I Don't Know About That - Wine

Episode Date: March 1, 2022

In this episode, the team discusses wine with Phoenix-based sommelier, influencer, TV personality, and online wine and social media consultant, Samantha Capaldi. Go to SamanthaSommelier.com to learn more and book virtual wine tastings! Follow Samantha on Instagram @SamanthaSommelier. Subscribe to our Patreon at patreon.com/IDKAT for ad free episodes, bonus episodes, and more exclusive perks! Tiers start at just $2! Go to JimJefferies.com to buy tickets to Jim's upcoming tour, The Moist Tour.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

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and which one's driven by an idiot? You might find out and I don't know about that with Jim Jefferies. Wow. I don't know. It's short notice. Damn.

Short notice. Short notice what? Oh my, if I could say in words. You drove here to do a podcast.'t know. It's short notice. Damn. Short notice. Short notice what? If I could say in words. You drove here to do a podcast. I know. I just did Arden Mirren's Bachelor podcast. We should do a podcast on The Bachelor.

I've already done it. Yeah. No, it was very fun. And then, you know, we're about to start this podcast. Jack, Jack, Jack, Jack, Jack. You're here. What gigs have I got coming up? Well, this comes out when you just did Boston and D.C.

Oh, they were good gigs. They were bloody good gigs. I'd like to say sorry to the people of Washington for ripping the roof off the joint. They're still fixing the venue. What a great gig. That was an outdoor show. Yeah.

It wasn't. Vegas. You got Vegas coming up. Yeah. It wasn't. Vegas. You got Vegas coming up. Viva Las Vegas, man. We're going to be in the Mirage Hotel as we always are. March 11th and 12th. 11th and 12th. And I know that that show is selling very well.

So get your tickets. Come along. I always enjoy myself in Vegas. And then that Sunday is Salt Lake City. I like them because there's short flights in there. The food is good, man. Oh, yeah. And then I'm doing Salt Lake City on the Sunday afterwards.

13th. 13th, which is also selling quite well. So, yeah. And this is my first time doing a gig in Salt Lake City, I believe. Wow. Really? Yeah, I believe so. I have been to Salt Lake City for the Sundance Film Festival.

Fuck me, I got sick after that, right? I got this type of flu that was like a funky, this is like six years ago, this funky-ass fucking weird COVID-y type flu that I was laid out, I was laid out, and I went to the doctor, and this is how unique this flu was. The doctor was checking me, and they go, did you go to Sundance by any chance? And I said, I did.

And he goes, yeah, we've been getting lots of people with this cold. Whoa. So he goes, yeah, it was like a thing. The Mormon flu. I've never had a doctor like just go, yep, that's what's happened to you, boy. That's crazy. So come on out to the Salt Lake City, guys. Yeah, the flu's probably gone by now.

It's been years. You're probably all immune. Herd immunity in Salt Lake. And then after that, a couple weeks later, you have San Antonio, Texas and Sugar Land, Texas. San Antonio, Sugar Land, Texas. A're probably all immune. Herd immunity in Salt Lake. And then after that, a couple weeks later, you have San Antonio, Texas and Sugar Land, Texas. San Antonio, Sugar Land, Texas. A bit of Texas action. It's like Houston, I think.

Won't be getting anyone pregnant because you can't do it in Texas no more. That's right. And then you can go to jimjeffries.com for all those dates. I'll be, again, I'm still going to be there April 7th through 9th. Side splitters, Tampa. Side splitters, Tampa. Side Splitters, Tampa. If you live in Tampa. And you don't care for your sides.

Yeah, yeah. Because they'll be aching. From the lifting. Yeah, you'll be watching Forrest. You'll be stitching him back up. You'll be falling out of your chairs. Sorry. What's happening?

I'm promoting my gig and that's what's happening. Kelly accidentally added a bit of porn just fucking you've ever had that where you just turn your phone on and the last thing you've been watching is porn and you go oh just check this on the internet you're on a train fuck my ass and you're like I'm so sorry everybody I don't know how

this got on to my or at work it's a virus I clicked on a link that Miss Alabama is dead, but it didn't play the video. The current Miss Alabama or an old one? The current one, I believe. Oh, that is sad. 27.

That is very sad. Yeah. If it was one of the old ones, just like fucking... She's 78. Back when I did the competition, it was sponsored by Marlboro. Also, our patron is doing well. If you, what do you say? $1.25 of entertainment? Look, this is the deal.

You join the patron. It costs you five bucks. You get four to four and a half episodes a week because there's more than four weeks in a month. Right? Except for February where we screw the fuck out of you. And if you're signing up now, it's the end of February. Yeah.

End of February. Oh yeah. You get the end of it. You'll get, you'll get the previous episodes too. You get to buy them all. They're all there. Yeah.

We got a comment recently that somebody said he's been listening since the Jim Jefferies show podcast listened since the beginning of this. And he said that the Patrion is the best content because he loves listening to us. Just fucking hang out. It's really just us talking shit. It's what the podcast probably should be. What the one that you listen

to should be. It's random. There's too many people doing these things where you're just chatting. Fucking chatting talkback radio. Well, sign up for that. Listen to the Patreon one because we really are chatting. If you enjoy chatting, you want to sit in your car and you go, I just

need company. Are you lonely? Jim Jeffery Show, Patreon. Patreon.com slash IDKAT. And if you go to Instagram and you follow us at IDKAT Podcast, there is a link for the Patreon on there too. You should be following us on IDKAT. And also follow all of us on Instagram. There's no links.

Well, not all of us. It's just me, Jim, and Kelly. So if you want to follow Jack and Louise, it says they're following IDK us on Instagram. There's no links. We didn't get, not all of us. We didn't get out. We didn't get out. It's just me, Jim and Kelly. So if you want to follow Jack and Louise, it says they're following ID Cat in there. So you go to where, follow by, you find them, then you follow them.

It only shows up that they're following because you follow Jack. You know us, yeah. Oh yeah. Well, good luck. You'll find them. You know their names. And we didn't get ads in time for this podcast,

correct? Are we going to wedge some in later? We didn't get ads in time. They didn't email us. So this is an ad-free episode. So this is an ad-free episode. Well, we don't get ads in time for this podcast correct? Are we going to wedge some in later? We didn't get ads in time So this is an ad free episode Well we don't know This is what you can experience on the Patreon There's a good chance I could be wedging it out in right now but I'll be wearing a different outfit

and then I'll be switching back to this outfit or there's another world where I just wear this outfit anyway I was going to say there's a good chance you're wearing a Santa. Yeah, this jacket's my go-to jacket at the present moment. It's a good one. Yeah, it'll start to smell, and then I'll have to get another jacket. That's how life goes.

Let's start the podcast. What about the jacket? We did start the podcast. No, let's meet our guests. Let's start the real bit where we meet people. Yeah, let's meet our guests. What do you think today's topic is? I don't know.

All right, please welcome our guest samantha capaldi good day samantha now it's time to play yes no yes no yes no yes no judging a book by its cover there's not enough barbershop quartets yeah um so samantha capaldi is here, and what do you think she's here to talk about? Okay, so Samantha has a poster of France behind her. So I'm going to say France. No, but. That was a good eye. I feel like we were all pretty impressed there.

I lived in Europe. The French are the only people that don't want stand-up comics from outside to come in. It is. Like, you can go perform in Germany. The French are like, we have our own people. There is the man who changes hats. All right. Energy drink.

Picture of a child. Some alcohol. Alcohol underneath the picture of the child. So, mums. Is it about mums and how hard it is? No, but you have all the clues there. You have so many clues. I thought when you said France, you were going to get it.

Yeah, France was good. Okay, so there have been a lot of wars. Yeah, okay, so you want to talk about arrogancy. Flippant rudeness. It can be involved in this Okay think about France And the alcohol bottles Oh wine

We're doing wine I'm not a wine guy I've had about three glasses Of wine in my life And one of them was a very expensive Glass of wine It was Penfold's Grange Hermitage, which is like a $500 bottle of red wine from Australia. And it was very nice. And I took a sip of that and went,

yeah, I get it. But I don't, I just, I think I could get into wine, but I just have enough vices that I don't need an extra one. And I don't need a pretentious one. You know, even with beers, I liked Heineken and I liked't need a potentious one. You know, I, I, even with beers, I liked Heineken and I liked a bit of red stripe and that was sort of, and I could have a Cronenberg or a Becks or something like that. I didn't really dig American beers, but I didn't drink them, you know, but then as you go, I got an IPA with a fruity fucking, get the fuck out of here.

All right. Well, um, Samantha Capaldi is a Phoenix based sommelier, uh, influencer, TV personality and online wine ask me what a sommelier is. An online wine and social media consultant. You can hire her for in-home private wine tastings or virtual tastings. And she's also recently launched a wine club. For information on all of this, you can check out her website, samanthassommelier.com and subscribe to her email list.

And also follow her on instagram at samantha samia samia is spelled i think i'm saying that right is s-o-m-m-e-l-i-e-r yay yeah am i saying that right oh i don't even know if i say it right i just say like i'm glad i'm glad we got our expert from Phoenix by the way the last bottle of wine I bought was in Phoenix the John Cleese thing I bought a bottle of wine I couldn't find an expensive

bottle shop they call them bottle shops in Australia do you want to tell us a little bit more about your wine club or your wine tastings or sure I mean I just want to start off by saying my whole purpose with my business is keeping wine fun and approachable i hate when people are snobby or stuffy with wine it's just not necessary it's just alcohol the end of the day

so you're definitely gonna enjoy the way that I talk about wine because I hate using that extravagant lingo. It's annoying. But I will tell you what some of it means if you ask me. So, of course, I'll tell you that. I'm all for pretentiousness. I'm snobby with tequilas and scotches. I've bought a very expensive scotch and sort of, oh, yes, woody taste.

I've done all that. I just didn't need another thing totally totally but yeah i mean my business is pretty virtual i kind of hyped it up during the pandemic since we couldn't do in person um and that's what brought on my wine club so people could continuing to you know be with each other and taste virtually with friends and family and kind of still realizing they can see each other you know every month and other and taste virtually with friends and family and kind of still realizing they can see each other you know every month and they don't need like a special occasion to do it so the club is so much more than just wine tasting it's a community of people that have just become

friends and we're doing trips and all of that so it's been really cool and i have a wine label coming out in april oh it's a it's a wonderful way for people to drink alone at home and not have a problem. Yeah. Right? They feel better because there's people, like, moral support on the screen, right? And they feel like they're learning something. Yeah, yeah.

So those two bonus things for sure. I have a wine club too, but it's just me on my couch. I used to have a cocaine club where we all, oh, I can taste the overtones of fentanyl. Oh, my God. where we all I can taste the overtones of fentanyl oh my god oh it's got a real anus condom-y taste anus condom so I'm going to ask Jim a series of questions on wine, we'll see how he does

and at the end of that of me asking those questions Samantha you're going to grade him on his accuracy 0 through 10, Kelly's going to grade him 0 through 10 on confidence, I'm going to grade him on his accuracy 0 through 10. Kelly's going to grade him 0 through 10 on confidence. I'm going to grade him on etc. and we'll add them all together. And if you get 21 through 30, whine. 11 through 20, whimper. 0 through 10, kick up a

fuss. These weren't good ones. I don't have a lot of time for the categories. Yeah, it should be whiner. Yeah. Whining. Yeah. And why don't you come over? Okay. Which one is that? The top or the bottom? Why don't you come over okay which one is that the top or the bottom why don't you come over okay i'll make that the top one all right jim what is wine uh wine is an alcoholic beverage made from grapes that is fermented over time to bring alcohol content into it and it grows

uh i won't say all over the world but in places that have sun uh you have good wines from you know australia america you're all over europe and stuff like that where is it grown here it's not in there uh napa valley up uh the north northern california is a good place for wine yeah that's it i it. I'm just, you said where. I said, well, yeah, in the lovely Jersey wine. Oh, we just, we tread on it with our feet. By accident. Sucked in a barrel of gabagool. Yeah, sucked in a barrel.

This is the wine that Sinatra used to drink. Just the way he liked it. Yeah, yeah. The cigarette buds give it a smoky taste. How is wine made? Well, you grow grapes. You mash the grapes. And then it's aged in, I believe, barrels.

And the barrels can often give it the different overtones of taste and flavor and stuff like that. And it the different overtones of taste and flavor and stuff like that and it's fermented over time the longer it's there and then when people taste it they're like oh it needs another month it needs another two weeks it needs another whatever it's a lot of a lot of that stuff what it's it's pretentious people and grapes man what is vinification uh it's when you go i told you that was a good wine. Thought it was a Red Hot Chili Peppers album, but okay. I've been Vinivacide. It would be the vinegar going into it or something like that.

It'd be an extra ingredient or something to give it. Because I've never understood where they go, oh, I can taste. There's some nutmeg. There's some, oh, yes. So it can't all be the wood. They've some nutmeg. There's some. There's some. Oh, yes. So it can't all be the wood. They've got to put other ingredients in there. I guess so.

Or it's something that's within the grapes and the soil that give the grapes the flavor. It's got to do with the region and all that type of stuff. But I'm sure it's more complex than just grapes and barrels. Okay. How long does wine last once you open it um not not really long who's drinking i've yeah i've uh yeah yeah like if kelly's there seconds what do you mean like in the fridge or on the shelf like it'll if it'll go bad if there's it oxidizes if it's got air in it there's's been, there's more wine inventions to make wine.

I used to work in a bar where you put a plastic cork in there and you get an air sucker. You take the air out and that would probably make it. But without any type of little trick put into it, I'm going to say two days. What are sulfites? That's where earth, wind and Fire get into a knife fight. That's a small fight.

With Missy Elephant. With Missy Elephant? Missy Elliot? It's a deep, no, it's a different artist. She's an even bigger girl. Okay. Are sulfides dangerous? If you're on the wrong side of it. Okay. okay uh are sulfides dangerous what are some general it's like if you watch west side story but the music's like

i already know what your first answer will be to this it's like when shaft kills you sulfide okay i already know what your first answer is going to be this but what are some general differences between red and white wine? Colour? Yeah. There's more tannins. I know that word. What is a tannin?

That's another question. Another question for another time. There's more tannins in red, I believe. I believe that white wine should be refrigerated, where red wine should be served at room temperature or ever slightly below because people have wine fridges, you know. I believe, I don't, this is something I'm not sure. I've heard that, I would want to say that white wine is made

with green grapes and red wine is made with red grapes, but I've heard that they're the same grapes but you leave the skin on, but I might be incorrect about that. But I'll say that red wine leaves the skin on and white wine doesn't. I'm fine with not being good at this. Why do some wines give you a headache? Because you're an alcoholic and you've drunk in too much. Okay.

Why is there sediment in wine sometimes? Tannins are meant to give you the hangovers. Tannins are meant to. Why is there sometimes sediment in wine, sometimes. Tannins are meant to give you the hangovers. Tannins are meant to. Why is there sometimes sediment in wine? Well, it's the same reason there's pulp at the bottom of juice, man. Okay. It's made out of fruit, dude. Okay.

Name as many types of wine as you can, like different types of red and white. Red, white. No, no, no, no. Like within the reds. Yeah, but then rosé. Yeah, but there's like, I'll give you one. Cabernet. I know, I know. I'm about to do that. Red, but then rosé. Yeah, but there's like, I'll give you one. Cabernet. I know, I know.

I'm about to do that. Red, white, rosé. We have chardonnay. Yeah, but chardonnay is a type of white. Oh, no, you just want the red categories. No, no, red and white, but just the types within them. I'm giving you the blanket ones. You don't just say red.

No, no, no. I'm giving you the categories, and then I'm going to do things underneath. Okay, okay. Under the white. Okay, so red, white, rosé I'm giving you the categories and then I'm going to do things underneath. Okay, okay. Under the white. Okay, so red, white, roast, eh? And then under the white, we have Chardonnay. Yeah. Riesling, which is a sweeter wine.

Yeah. Semillon Blanc. Right? Which is another one. And Frankie's Taste of Paradise, which is, you can get that at Margaritaville and Margaritaville only. Is that right? And then in the reds, Cabernet Sauvignon.

We'll have a Merlot. We'll have a nutty little Cabernet Sauvignon Blanc is the other one. Is drinking one good for you? If you ask wine drinkers, they'll fucking harp on about this all day. Oh, I had one glass of red wine for the antioxidants. Yes, yes, they all live forever, wine drinkers. Okay, what is aeration? It's where you pour the wine and you leave it to air before you serve it.

That's sometimes why you want to put it into a decanter. That's also why you want to put it into a big glass so you can swish it around so the air can touch the wine so that it is more palatable to your potential taste buds. What does it mean if a wine is dry? It's a very dry wine. It is a good question because I actually could taste something and tell you a truth, but I don't know how to describe it.

It's less sweet. They've taken the sweetness out. Because when they say a dry martini, you want more olives in there than you want just vodka or whatever. So it's less sweet. What are tannins? Remember those? Tannins come from the skin of the grape, and they affect your headaches.

I'm not sure about this, but this is the things that I've heard. Okay. What do these terms regarding tasting mean? Legs. Legs. Legs. I would say that like so a Merlot has a long taste. It sits on your palate for a long time, and it sort of shifts down,

and then it goes over your tongue. So I'll say that's a wine that has legs because the taste goes on, and then, oh, it's hitting the back of my tongue. It's hitting the front of my tongue. Okay. All that type of stuff. What about cork taint? Cork is when a-

No, cork taint. Well, if a wine is corked, and I'm assuming this is where the cork taint comes from, it means oxygen has gotten in through the cork and has ruined the wine. What about, these are referring to tasting, so mouthfeel. That's how it feels in your mouth, man. Okay. How do you pair wines with food and what are the best general rules?

You go to the liquor shop and they sometimes have like a picture of a fish next to the thing and they go, this one's good with steak. There's never a's never a hamburger wine hamburger wine but what are the best general rules like if you didn't have those pictures uh red wine goes with um uh beef is a thing red yeah red wine sauces on on different beefs and stuff like that white wines are better for fish okay and seafood all right a couple more questions does a cork versus screw cap affect the taste of wine? Ah, see, the eternal thing. I believe now, no, it does not. But for many years, they believed it did. But I worked as a waiter where I had to, you know,

there was people that were very, is it corked or screwed? And this is in the 90s. And I believe now it's not as much an issue. And I believe you can get very fine wines now that have a screw top on it. But historically, it was believed that corking was better. Okay. Are all wines aged? Of course.

Everything's aged, whether it's for a minute or fucking five years. It's been around. It's like saying, does it just instantly appear on your fucking table? No, it does not. I think you know what I mean, but okay. You never heard of Jesus? He aged. You got to 33, man.

The wine he made immediately from water. 33 yeah it's immediate yeah but it was still like by the time he lives has been aged for like 10 seconds okay fair okay you win you always do last question uh podcast last question what is the samia a samia is a person who is a wine connoisseur and taster who can tell you about the wine and what it does. See, with the wines, right, when you go to the restaurant, I've been with people who are into wine and they look at the wine menu and you'll be in a fancy restaurant. There'll be 50 fucking wines there and they always do.

It depends on how much you like the person. If you date this person for a very long time, you get the cheapest bottle. If you're trying to impress this person, you might get the fifth cheapest bottle and then like for most dates, the third cheapest bottle is where you sort of sit because you think i'll get a good one nobody really fucking there would be some people but most people wouldn't know the difference between all those 50 different wines and if they did they're a full-blown fucking alcoholic if they show up and they look at a menu and they go, oh, yes, from the Barossa Valley in South Australia, I'll take a sneaky Merlot red.

No, they don't fucking know. Everyone's looking at the price. You get what you pay for. That's the gauge in the world, right? So I go to dinner parties, I go to buy someone wine to take, and I just sort of go, $20 bottle, depending on how good a friend they are. $20. But then I get given, like, $20 bottle, depending on how good a friend they are, $20. But then I get given wine, like the last bottle of wine

that I've been given, and I cook with wine. I still use wine. Snoop Dogg gave me a bottle of his rosé. I have a Snoop Dogg, and I got given, Vanderpump gave me one of her rosé, which both of those rosés I made a Jamie Oliver pesto and rosé shrimp pasta. Wow.

Let's just see if we can get one from Missy Elephant. Can you have Vanderpump send over a crate, please? I tell you what, because I'm almost a year into drinking, the last real big drink I had was Vanderpump gave me a bottle of vodka and I don't know how it tastes, but I drank it quick. And one night I drank the whole fucking Vanderpump bottle by myself and watched vanderpump rules and i had a wonderful day and that was rock bottom that's why you haven't drank in a year

i gotta turn this shit around all right samantha um how did jim do zero through ten ten's the best on us answering these questions on wine just like as a whole problem yeah oh my god you did amazing i'd say like an eight i thought you did very well too those were hard questions too so like you say you're not a wine person but most people even in my wine club that like know this but not know any of those so you're you're very knowledgeable that was impressive I'm never taking heroin either but I know things yeah I'd say a solid A good job man thanks thanks a messy elephant

you know he kept he kept talking about how he didn't know things so i would only give him a five on confidence i could have done i think i think you did better than your confidence showed well i was a waiter i was a waiter and i've been around people drinking wine okay well for etc i'm gonna give you Oaky Finish. And if you add that all together, it means why didn't you, what was yours? Why didn't you come on over? I like to be called wine, oh my God.

Wine-om-g? Wine-om-g. Wine-om-g. All right. One of the top podcasts in the world, people. Wine-om-g, yeah. So I asked him, what is wine? one of the top podcasts in the world wine OMG Samantha asked him what is wine he said an alcoholic beverage made from grapes that is fermented over time to increase

alcohol content was there anything else to add to that that's spot on yeah do they grow it in New Jersey he said New Jersey they grow it is there wine from New Jersey I mean let's be honest they grow wine everywhere these days wine from New Jersey? I mean, let's be honest. They grow wine everywhere

these days. Yeah, like it is what it is. I mean, Arizona makes wine and I think it's pretty decent. But then again, there's a lot of people who would say that it sucks. So just depends on who you're talking to. But yeah, I believe it. I like that Jersey wine. They're like, I got

a vineyard next to my cousin's body shop. You get your car fixed and press some grapes. It's a good day out for the kids. That would be a good way for a mob to kill people. Put them in the barrels. This one tastes like

Fat Tony. I remember in Florida where I'm from, there was a winery there. And I'm like, Florida? It doesn't seem like, it's so hot there. But I thought it had to be kind of cool to grow. No, the way they grow it in Australia is boiling hot. But it's very dry heat.

I don't know how it works. But, you know, Australia, it's all South Australia. Where Amos is from? Adelaide. Oh, and then that's where it all comes from. And Australians really think we have the best wine in the world. I don't know if the rest of the world sees us like that, but we think we grow the best wine in the world.

And then the Europeans do, the French do. So does the French, yeah. Yeah. Do you rate Australian wines? Do you think they're good? I have one of my tasting bundles is Australianralian wine yeah i had some wine that was good from australia all right so how is wine made you grow grapes you mash the grapes aged in barrels barrels give overtones and taste of flavor jim said there's other ingredients added into the

barrels i don't know how i think i'm wrong on that one yeah Yeah. Yeah. So it's like, so not a black and white answer. So I think you answered it really well, but basically the flavor of a grape starts with the grape itself. So before it's even planted anywhere, like Sauvblanc is known for certain characteristics, right? Pinot Grigio is known for certain characteristics. And then when you plant it in what the French call the terroir, which is like soil climate environment that impacts the flavor profile.

So that vintage year, like what was the heat? Like, you know, the weather, all of that, what's the soil type, right? Like, and then the last thing is the winemaker. So when did they harvest it? What did they ferment it in? How long did they ferment it in? And yeah, winemakers could add all sorts of shit to their wine. Like egg whites, for example, is something that's added all the time to make a wine smoother. So that's why it's such a big discussion for the vegan community on like what wine they're like 100% vegan. Because it's so normal to add those things.

Yeah. And I would say that when we talk about like cinnamon and nutmeg and all that stuff, that's coming from the barrel. They're not actually like adding, know those ingredients and stuff but i wouldn't put it past a lot of different additives and kind of going into the headache question how you mentioned the tannins it's not so much the tannins as it is the other shit that wineries could get away putting into their wine and i just call them additives they're they're just the unknown that we don't know what it is like in food that's who knows but that's interesting i was always wondering about the when like because recently vegan wines have

like popping up on instagram and all that stuff i'm like what the fuck does this mean like why would it not be vegan okay yeah no animal products yeah do they have to write the ingredients on the side of the bottle i've never checked look that's such a good question. No, no. And that's what makes it so hard. And I feel like on every tasting, once I like open that lid, like there's endless questions and it's just, there's no simple answer because wineries aren't going to broadcast, you know, every single step that they took. There's something called a tech sheet. That's usually public information that will say like how it was made, what barrels, but as far as little additives and stuff like that they don't have to disclose that a lot of european wine regions have

a lot more stricter rules than we do in the states so often i tell people most of the time europe european wines probably don't have a lot of that crap going on you know that's a big you know statement but to keep it simple i usually say it's a little bit less of those additives coming out of those areas but even okay so when we buy groceries like my wife won't let anything that's not organic come into the house she's very particular about it and you know i'm a bit more neither here nor there about it but um do you have to even say the grapes are organic or can the grapes be covered in pesticides and stuff like that? Or is it none of it? Yeah. Yeah.

That's like one of those other open-ended questions where everyone asks me, should I only look for organic? But here's the thing. There's so many wineries in Australia, Spain, you know, France, Italy, that are already organic, but they didn't pay for that label to say that, if that makes sense. It's kind of like being really smart without getting your degree or whatever, right? So a lot of areas, wineries are naturally organic and pesticide free, but they didn't go that extra step to have that credential labeled on the bottle. So I typically say, if you're actively trying

to search for organic, sure, buy the wine that says organic, but there's also so, so many that are, they just don't literally say it on the bottle. It's like the Hollywood walk of fame. Like everybody who has a star paid $35,000 to get a star and it's just for the accolade. Now with the, you said egg, egg whites was one of the things. Is there any other suspect ingredients that, uh, that people are concerned about?

Is there any other suspect ingredients that people are concerned about? I would say the biggest one would be like histamines and stuff like that, but that's naturally occurring in wine during the process. Same with sulfites. So sulfites get a bad rep as well. I know that was one of the questions. What are sulfites? We can do them out of order.

I don't believe I was right on that answer. was like one of the only ones you were like wrong on i mean there was like two that's why i give you eight out of ten but anyways they're basically um compounds in the wine uh process that help preserve the the length the time frame of a wine once it's bottled so here's the thing like there's all these different studies that there's more sulfites in like a bag of dried apricots than there is in a bottle of wine. So when people say that they're allergic to sulfites, they might just personally have a really, you know, high sulfite allergy, which is again, in dried fruit, potatoes, like French fries, I always say if you could eat a container of In-N-Out fries, and not like feel like shit from that, like you can drink a bottle

of wine so basically sulfites are natural it's when wineries add more on top of the naturally occurring sulfites which could increase you know that sensitivity and additives for people um but they're they're nothing to be scared of they're not necessarily bad for you um only bad if like you consume way more which is like i don't know like multiple bottles of wine a day, plus all these foods that have sulfites, right? The more you eat of anything, it's going to be bad for you. So kind of jumping to the question is wine good for you? I honestly say no, it's alcohol. Like I'm pretty honest about that. Like if you're putting alcohol in your body,

I don't think that's good. Maybe the whole red wine theory because of the antioxidants and shit, but at the end of the day, it's booze. So I wouldn't say it's good for you. I would say as you know, with anything too much of anything is not great. If you do a study, even if it's five people and it's on wine or chocolate being good for you, you will get on good morning America and they will fucking talk to you about your findings.

Those, those, those, those two ladies that are always drunk on the morning TV, Hoda and what's her name? Hoda and Kathy Lee. Hoda and Kathy Lee who are sourcing it up at 8 in the morning.

They have my dream job. They will have you on at fucking, if you just say you drink wine and it'll kill cancer. Just say it. I know. We gotta give the people what they want to hear, right? So anytime it goes with like, I'll be drinking

on Instagram all the time and I get these DMs and people are like, you make me feel so much better about my alcohol intake. Sam, thank you. And I'm like, that's just to be a compliment that I'm an alcoholic. But cheers. Go open a bottle. Hey, if it's good for your mental health as part of your health. So if it's good for your mental health, it's part of your health.

So if it's good for your mental health, it's good for your health. I have done research that cocaine will help you lose weight. I should get on it. I hope me and Hoda should be sitting there going, what? Really? We should do this every morning? Where are your findings published?

Well, if you lose weight, it's better on your heart. Where are they published? I wrote it on a napkin you have to bartender take this show people what is vinification jim says when i told you that wine was good or vinegar or something going into it it's just the conversion of fruit juices you know so great juice you know turning into wine fermentation that's all it is yeah so how was wine first discovered i'm always fascinated by this i know how it's discovered some bucker but he had some grape juice and he left it too long but do you know the history of how it was made korag what did he do different i've heard different stories on that and to be honest i don't know what the truth is.

People told me that the first ever wine discovery was in Turkey. But then if you'd ask Europe, like Spain, Italy, and France, it was there. So there's all these different answers, honestly, out there. I don't confidently know the true origin. We know that cheese was accidentally left in there. Someone is using the sheep's gut or something as a bag. And then he had some milk in there and then it was all curded up. And then that's how cheese... Also, here's one for you. How did it get mixed up with cheese wine?

Like, how did that relationship kicked off? Like, weren't you damaging your body enough that you go, I should eat a plate of cheese with this? And then when did walnuts fucking step in? Like, I'd like to be involved. I'm a walnut. I'd like to be at the party. Like, they just seem like a group that should never be hanging out. What happened?

The cheese and wine came from the old world, which is Italy, Spain, and France. You know, that's where we started getting, like, all the imported, like, fine cheeses and wine from originally. And so they say what grows together goes together. So, you know, all these areas of France that are making certain style cheese, you know, are going to go with the wines that are in that region. So it just became, you know, a cultural phenomenon. Like think of like Italy, like how they always have like table wine with like pizza, pasta.

They've always seen wine as a food pairing component. Us in America, we're like, what has the most alcohol to drink on the couch by myself? You know, like no food, no other people in Europe. Like it's always been an experience with that food and that wine. I don't think necessarily it's just cheese, but that's like the biggest pairing component that they figured out really balances out the wine between acidity and tannin.

What do you, what food do you think goes best? Because I will jump to that question where I said, I think I said steak for red, seafood for white. Was I right on that? Oh yeah, no doubt. I feel like it's fun to get more like creative with the pairings instead of saying all white wine goes with white fish and all red wine goes with, you red meat i like to kind of think of other outside the box pairings which is my job if i wasn't like an expert i probably would just stick to that but i always tell people think of like the weight of the wine the body like the tannin level so kind of jumping and

combining the tannins i think you've got this one right or you didn't answer it i forget but it's the skins of the wine grape and that's what you know helps make a red wine red and then what gives it like um that you know that like drying sensation you get in like a really tannic red wine like chianti you know uh bordeaux's where it's just like lingering on your cheeks and your tongue i get a locked your thing i get a locked your thing when i when i eat like chinese food but i thought that was from m MSG or something like that. But I don't know. Maybe it's with wine. I have to go like that and my whole jaw locks up. Are you sure that wasn't the cocaine? No, no, no. I never eat Chinese

food with cocaine. They don't pair, Kelly. Yeah, it is the weight loss drug. I forgot, my bad. I'm going to pair this cocaine with the lovely water oh my gosh but yeah i mean that's probably the tannins but what was my point on that oh the pairing component so if a wine is like really tannic and heavy right you probably do need like a steak or a burger but if it's like a light wine like a bourgeois it's like this really light you know kind of lighter than a pito noir style grape i'm like pair that with salmon pair that with turkey like it's not too heavy so even though it's red it could still go with like fish light meat stuff

like that it just depends on the style what grows together goes together and so it's like here here you got the grapes on the land and they go with that lovely fish over there. Sure. Like think of like Sicily, like they grow a grape called Grillo close to the coast, like a soft blonde Pinot Grigio. So if you're in Sicily, the table white wine with like your fish is always the Grillo. Does that make sense? So like whatever the grape bridal thrives there, they're going to pick a berry that

also is popular. So this is interesting. So to make a Riesling or a Merlot or a Cabernet Blanc or whatever like that, it's the grape. So you know that grape is a Riesling when you look at it, or it's not in the fermentation that does it. That's a Riesling grape? Exactly.

Oh. Exactly. Like the grape itself. Yeah. So it's like Arizona, before we like planted our own grapes, we would buy like bulks of the grapes our own grapes, we would buy bulks of the grapes to plant here to have. So we'd buy

Tempranillo, right? We'd buy Pinot Noir. So yeah, the grape itself before planted is going to be, you already know, the varietal. And you said, just to get back, so the tannins is from the skin of the grapes, but then also the red and whites, was Jim correct on that? Where the white is just the skin of the grapes but then also the red red and white is was jim correct on that

where the white is just the flesh or is and without that was that was so impressive that you said you said white wines are green grapes yeah that's true white wines are green grapes red wine right and so the but then the big difference after is so you've probably heard of orange wine that's like a big thing going on right now. Orange wine is white wine with skin contact. So even if you left the skins on a white wine, it still wouldn't ever turn red. You know, it would only turn like orange, like that on my paper or whatever. Red wine will always be able to turn that red color.

That's like how we get like rosé and stuff. The light blush pink from the red wines skins is tannins. But yeah, white wine before it's planted is a green grape. And do the, do red grapes and green grapes grow in the same area or do they need different climates? Yeah, they can. For example, like Napa does really good Chardonnays and like Cabernet Sauv next to each

other. Cause both of them need like a good amount of sun and they both need to be full bodied. You probably wouldn'ternet Sauv next to each other because both of them need a good amount of sun and they both need to be full-bodied. You probably wouldn't grow Sauv Blanc and Cabernet Sauv next to each other because Sauv Blanc is such a light grape that it doesn't need to get really rich and full-bodied. It thrives from a cooler to moderate region. So depending on the grape style, for sure, they could grow in the same area. and do you mix grapes together to make a different flavor yeah so blends for sure so like a big popular one you've probably heard of it a gsm blend grenache thuramavedra that started in the rhone valley of france um now it's popular in washington oregon you know california but they found out that those three grapes together

go really well because Mavedra by itself is really strong and tannic. So mixed with the Syrah and the Light Grenache, it balances each other out. So a lot of wineries, they do it purposely, but say like it just was a bad year for their Cabernet Sauve or their Syrah, then they'd probably blend it, right? To try to make the most out of it. So blends can either be purposely planned or you know um a solution to make the wine better if one standalone grape wasn't the best now i i um when i did well i um i don't drink wine but i do drink champagne um champagne i found a lot more palatable and you know i can taste a good champagne versus a bad champagne um is this champagne before it's aerated or it's got bubbles in it is it would it be a good quality wine or

is the bubbles doing a lot of heavy lifting on this thing i would say the bubbles do a lot for champagne however uh pinot noir chardonnay and pinot meunier are the three grapes that thrive in champagne so they could make a decent standalone but they usually harvest the grapes early so it would probably be acidic if they were standalone they go through that process to add the sugar

and the bubbles and all of that so I really do think that's possible. Are they add sugar to champagne they don't add sugar to wine? Both, it just depends sugar could just be natural through the fermentation process, or they could add extra to make it more of a sweet wine. So that dry question. So basically, the wine is dry or sweet based on the end process after natural fermentation.

So at the end, if they, you know, went through the fermentation and they had the sugar levels and they measured it, and they wanted it to be sweeter, they could, if they wanted it to be drier, they can make that happen. But naturally they wouldn't do anything to it as if it was more of like a pure vineyard, you know, bottle to wine type of thing. So wait, champagne is just a region and it's the, that's not the type of grape. Exactly. Yeah. So Europe likes to call the wine by the place. So like champagne is a physical place. And that's why everyone like gets all like you can't call all bubbly champagne.

Right. Because they're not all from champagne. Most of the time we're drinking California Spark later. We're drinking Prosecco or we're drinking Cava. So champagne is usually more expensive because of the prestigious area of the region, the grapes involved and all of that. But usually we'll say the wines made in the champagne method. So I know Kelly follows my Instagram and I like savor all the time. Like I love savoring wine. So I always tell people, you don't need to savor an actual champagne, just make sure it's made in the champagne method, which is a traditional method process where it

goes through oak, it's a little bit fuller bodied it has more bubbles so for example prosecco doesn't go through oak it doesn't have as much um co2 so i say don't savor that champagne method style wine does so it's it doesn't really matter in my opinion if you're drinking actual champagne or if you're drinking just a good quality bubbly brew from napa um but that way that it's made is exactly the same. I feel like the Coopers deserve more credit than almost the grape growers, right? So when you're saying the barrel that it goes in,

like can you get just a good barrel or is there like guys that like they make the best barrels and then maybe do they treat the wood or is the wood just like that? Or is the wood slightly, you know, burnt to bring out flavor or what goes on there? Sure. Yeah, the barrels are a huge part of why you like certain wines, you know. So I give an example of say you're going wine tasting in Napa and you go to three wineries all on the same block and you try all their Cabernet Sauv's, but you liked them or disliked them all very differently. The end result was probably that barrel. So there's bourbon barrels, you know, which is obviously where whiskey was primarily made in and then they're using it for wine.

So you're going to get smoky flavors, those spices, all of that. There's French oak barrels that are known for certain characteristics, American oak neutral, all these different things. And usually the price points are how old they are, for one, I mean, I feel like a lot of wineries like, you know, like, used barrels, right, because they developed all those flavors over time. So it comes down to that, you know, the quality of them, all of that, but there's like hundreds of styles of oak aging and barrels. But French oak, American oak, stainless steel and bourbon barrels are probably the top few that we hear about. So like those plastic barrels in Breaking Bad, they would make a bad wine? There's plastic ones? Yeah. No, he's talking about

that was what they were using. They were storing acid in it. In Breaking Bad, yeah. That was what they were using. They were storing acid in it. Oh. Yeah. I'm like, are they making wine and meth? I don't remember that. Could I make wine in like, I got a bucket, like an earthquake kit. I've got all the stuff kicked out. Could I, if I sealed it up right, could I do it in a plastic bucket?

Honestly, shit. You could probably make wine however you want, but it's going to probably be really bad. Because when you make beer, when you have a home- Toilet wine. When you make home brew beers, they give you a, you know, the yeast and all that, and they give you a plastic barrel. You know, every bloke when they turn 20 thought, that's what I'm going to do.

I'm going to brew my own beer. Because these people who make them for a living can't do as good as I can in my fucking toilet. Yeah, they make it in like toilets in the prison. They do everything in the toilet in prison. Make what you can get when you're in prison. Is there wine that you can make that doesn't involve grapes? Fruit wine? Yeah. I mean, people like how we talked about like basically wine is grape juice you know fermented

into alcohol i guess you could ferment someone sent me um apple wine before right so there's different fruit wines that people have like if you watch it's crazy i might sound as dumb as fuck right but like so vodka you know there's several different ways to make vodka but a lot of it's potato based right and so is there an argument that that's a potato wine I've never heard of one if you find one you get what I'm saying

vodka's distilled though there's a cooking process and then you got like gin's got juniper berries but those are all distilled so they're like cooked they're added the heat's added to it and yeah it's not just aged in a barrel the way wine is in the fermenting process. So I don't think it's the same.

If you age it long, does it reach a maximum alcohol content? Or if you age it for a thousand years, can it get even higher or something? Yeah, because I was going to ask about the years. What is it? Yeah, so alcohol, after the wine is bottled, right? And say you were aging it in your cellar, whatever, the alcohol won't go up after it's bottled, you know, the alcohol remains stagnant. So it's only

ever going to get higher if you're fermenting it longer in the barrel. Does that make sense? So alcohol is done after bottling. Vintage year is just the date that the wine was harvested, right? So harvest, you know know could be anywhere from september to november so every year i was talking about like the terroir which is like climate soil all of that so as we know like climate change and all of that is going on so vintage years right are gonna vary between each year fires like when fire season hits that can make the that vintage year more smoky because of the burnt soil stuff right so you. Right, so you don't want to eat that Australian 2019 wine. That Australian 2019.

Oh, my God, yeah. It's got a very smoky taste to it. I can taste a bit of koala flesh in here. Oh, my God, that's so sad. So why would someone say, oh, this is a nice 18-year-old bottle? It's not how old it is it's what year it's from is the important thing right yeah i i don't really get into aging because like i live in a tiny apartment in phoenix i have no room to age wine and it's like basically like

having another job to make sure it's like stored properly but yeah there is supposedly like good vintagers good years where it got like that great amount of sun and rainfall. Right. And so a lot of people who are into aging will will research that and will know that like just top of my head. Bordeaux is like an affordable, budget friendly, like good year in Bordeaux was 2015. So I tell a lot of people, if you want like a Bordeaux under $30, that's pretty good. Get a 2015, if that makes sense. So it's just kind of researching the climate of those years. But I usually tell people like how, you know, you were saying when you go to a restaurant, like if it was a blind tasting, you know, you

don't really know the cost of these wines and like all of that. The vintage year, you could probably tell by the color. So in my virtual and private tastings we'll talk about that and basically red wine gets lighter over time so if you notice a red wine looking kind of orangey that's probably an older year you see a white wine looking really um dark you know more brown that means that it got older over time so visually you could tell age um or you would have to look up the winery's tech sheet and see other Other than that, it's not very prominent of a thing. I'm sure your taste tests, you've been put to the test. Have you ever had to taste a $5 bottle of wine next to a $300 bottle of wine

and then tell us which is the better? Yeah. And have you ever fucked up on that? Oh, my God, yeah. I do this. It's called the millennial wine competition. Um, my friend started it basically as kind of a proof. So it works, but everyone whinges the whole time.

There could be a really like awesome $5 wine, you know, that sommelier is like gave a good score too. And also the average wine consumer and it's a mix of different judges in it or whatever but yeah every year that i do that competition i've given gold medals to like under 10 bottles like barefoot i've given a gold medal to fucking barefoot and i felt like so bad i was like i quit stop calling it fucking barefoot man it bested you you call it barefoot the gold medal winning wine. No, listen. And then after I like went through my fit about it,

feeling all, you know, not confident. I was like, you know what? I like this wine. In the moment, it was like a total porch pounder. It was juicy. It was delicious. Like I liked it for what it is. And it doesn't mean that I, you know,

don't think a $300 bottle deserves credit, in applied tasting you're not really thinking about that you're just thinking on what tastes good so i always tell people like don't feel bad if you like a cheaper wine you know buy that one but then just you know appreciate the quality of an expensive one just because it probably did go through more steps to be what it is it probably was a really good vineyard all of that be what it is it probably was a really good vineyard all of that but yeah to me it's not a big deal i drink franzio boxed wine now it's 14.99 for 34 glasses oh wow what a porch pounder i'm not talking about the wine bodega bodega bodega boxed wine is one of my go-tos yeah i love canned canned wine. Australia is very proud of the fact that we invented the cask wine,

the wine in a bag. That's one of our, yeah. I think we even mentioned the Olympics. We're like, we brought out all of our inventions. It was like the lawnmower, wine in a bag and the clothesline.

Australia. It is funny with wine though because essentials well we call it we call it goon right the wine in a bag and i remember okay i've got a couple of goons so there's a game that when you're a teenager you play in australia called goon of fortune which which puts two australian inventions in the hills hoist which is a rotary clothes hanging line that you can spin around and hang your washing on. So it's not hanging across the garden. It's in a block like that, right?

So what you do is you all stand under it. You peg the bag of wine on the clothesline and then you spin it and that's your goon of fortune. And if it lands underneath you, you've got a skull from the lip. That's a great game. Now my other story is when I was about, oh, God, I was in university. I was 19. 19, I was in university. I was 19. 19, I was in university.

I was going out to a concert and I think I must have been drinking wine this day because we wanted to sneak alcohol in. And so it was a winter day and so I was wearing a light coat because it's Australia, Perth we're in. And I got a bag of goon and I strapped it to my stomach with another belt. So it just looked like I had a bag of goon and I strapped it to my stomach with another belt. So it just looked like I had a pot belly and that was my device for pouring out free alcohol when I was in the thing.

And so I had my goon of fortune hanging around my stomach. Anyway, later on, I'm drunk as a fuck, 19, and I crossed the road and like a car honked and I sort of gave him the finger like, yeah, fucking drunk drunk fuck you like that level of drunk and that car happened to be a police car and so the cop didn't notice it was a police car I was fucking they might have been two cars behind or something it wasn't my I don't think I said fuck you I sort of gave my hand like I'm crossing the road you know it was nighttime it would just be I was being a belligerent 19 year old right so anyway so the cop pulls out and then all of a sudden you're trying to act like you're all

sober and he's like what did you know blah blah blah jaywalking like there wasn't anything quite that he could get me for just being a drunken disorderly was what he was going for and this guy was just going to give me a talking to like that i was standing with my friends and i knew i was the one in trouble the rest of them weren't and then like i said i'm sorry officer yeah no no i wasn't wrong there officer oh yeah no problem and then he goes lift up your shirt like that because they're the little pot belly that every time i was talking was jiggling about jiggling yeah it was jiggling and then he goes lift up your shirt i go i'd rather not like this right and he goes lift up your shirt and then i just slapped it i went boom and it went like that right and i went i'm

kind of sensitive about it and he laughed so hard he said go home I think we answered a lot of these here. Why does someone's give you a headache? Jim said, cause you're an alcoholic or tenants. He's not wrong, but kind of going back to what we were talking about, that whole additive stuff, like the basic way that I put it is,

you know how everyone's doing those food sensitivity tests and they're like, Oh, I can't eat pepper anymore, garlic and all that stuff. Like the basic way that I put it is, you know, how everyone's doing those food sensitivity tests. And then like, Oh, I can't eat pepper anymore, garlic and all that stuff. So think about how much those little things can be added to the wine and mess with your system. Just how, you know, food, you know, processing does. So it's really, really hard to say what wines are going to give you more headaches, but drinking too much of it. And then the alcohol content. So like people don't realize that when you're drinking like a 14.5% wine, that's high alcohol. And maybe you're used to drinking 13% wine. So kind of factoring alcohol content, tannins. Yeah. Cause that adds more alcohol into red wines for sure. Additives, stuff like that, more sulfites than they need to have stuff. Stuff that have. Stuff that's put in more than needs to be is usually

where the headaches are coming from. And forgetting to eat before you binge drink. I should have said James Brown. And not drinking water. James Brown over Missy Elephant would have been a better thing because then I could have, during the fight when he knocks you down, he could have shoot and go, get up, get on up. Do you want Louisa to edit that in? Yeah up that's a good do you want louisa edit that in yeah that's a good soul fight put that in there yeah earth wind and fire fighting james brown the jokes are written over time um and the sediment maybe you answered this but the sediment is just like the pieces of grapes is that what that is uh sediment is basically just like the byproduct of winemaking

and it settles at the bottom of the glass, you know, and it happens, you know, after the fermentation process, we call it like wine crystals to make it sound a little bit nicer. My God, I was spot on with that answer. It's like pulp in your juice. It's fruit, man. Yeah. I thought that was a great, great explanation for real. But it doesn't, it doesn't, it's not bad for you it might taste a little crunchy so i just tell people if you notice there's a lot of sediment in your wine then you bring out what we call a decanter or aerator um which answers the other question and i i think you answered it flawlessly but you're basically bringing off into your wine it's like when you

leave come in a cup and the chunky bits go to the bottom It's like when you leave cum in a cup and the chunky bits go to the bottom. I'm not in a cup. I haven't. I'm at a fucking, I'm at a, I'm donating. Kelly will like this. No, no, no. The reason I'm doing this is because the last couple of podcasts Kelly has gone, it always comes back to cum.

We always manage to bring cum. So I try to find one cum gag in there every time. That was pretty sweet. That was very thoughtful of you. I appreciate that. Can you name, I mean, Jim named some. You might not like this gift, but the sediment's good. I like that.

Let's edit that out. So Jim named, maybe, Jim named some, and I know he was right about some, but can you name a bunch of reds and whites for us because it's all the grapes right is that the can I just combine them all Cabernet Sauvignon

Cabernet Franc Pinot Noir Sangiovese Petit Verdot Syrah Riesling Pinot Grigio Pinot Green Nebbiolo San Giovese San Vendel

She passed the test You know what wine needs? It needs some cross promotion like vodka does See vodka isn't just happy being the best spirit of it all because it doesn't taste of anything and it can add flavor to anything Every now and again, the good people

at Smirnoff will go, Cinnabon. And they'll just throw it in. Vodka's always fucking around with things that people don't want. Arby's made of vodka. Yeah, yeah, yeah. They add a little flavour. So I reckon that they should do that with wine. They should go,

this is a Merlot infused with nerds. Oh, nerd candy. I would have that. No, they just did that. Nerd vodka, my friend. They just made an Oreo wine. Boom.

They made a red wine? No, but they should. We'll make it. Yeah, they made an Oreo wine. That's been, yeah. I think it was like a big company. It might have been Frenzy even. But it's like a box and it comes with like the Oreo wine wine like oreo infused wine and then a box of oreos with it and i asked a couple people

and they said it was good so you gotta try that for your food review the oreos in it i don't know i guess you could that's just a lot of oreo action going on do you ever just like because there's an episode of the office where michael scott is eating his steak and he just dips it into his red wine is that a thing that people do i like it we have soft teeth yeah yeah i have soft teeth yeah okay i've never i've never seen that happen but in italy old ladies dip their like cookies like their biscottis and all of that into their wine to like which is slang for tits and nearly. That's so gross. Kelly played out.

Who says you shouldn't watch this online? In that movie, Sideways, what's the wine he doesn't like? Merlot. Is that what he keeps saying? Merlot. Like Paul Giamatti? And didn't that affect sales or something?

Everyone hates Merlot. Oh, yeah.. Oh yeah. And I love Merlot. So it's just, it's funny how, you know, pop culture and TVs and movies can do all of that. That's how Rose got popular. I mean, Emily in Paris, Kelly, you might watch Emily in Paris, but now everyone knows what Sancerre is, which is the French Savant. So yeah, everything's kind of dominated by what people hear. I'll say this about wine, and I've done this several times. Wine is very good for comedy when you want to play a character who believes they're smart but is actually stupid.

So you go, a lovely glass of Merlot, and then you go, call it champagne. I always love calling champagne champagne. Peanut, peanut, champagne. You do that. You go, have some all champagne. I always love calling champagne champagne. Yeah. Peanut. Peanut. You go, have some champagne, my dear. It's a celebration. I do the stupid smart guy all the time.

That's a good character. Here's some tasting terms. Legs. Jim said this is how long the taste sits on your palate. Yeah. Legs are easy. So, like, that's just the stains sits on your palate. Yeah. Legs are, legs are easy. So like, that's just the stains on the wine glass.

So legs means the same thing as stains droplets. And typically that's just the sugar levels in wine. So the longer legs, the thicker they're staining the glass. It sticks to the side of the glass. You want legs? You don't want legs? I think that's like a big funny thing in the industry where people are like, oh, beautiful legs, beautiful wine.

I mean, I don't think it means anything to do with the quality. It's just a showing alcohol level. So it'd be kind of interesting if like a Cabernet Sauvignon, which is supposed to be pretty high in alcohol, had no legs. So I think people are just trying to like, you know, gauge it based on what they know about the great varietals. So more legs usually means more alcohol, more sugar levels, less legs usually means less alcohol, less sugar levels in the mouthfeel. Like you just said, yeah, how you get in the mouth. Totally.

It's the fancy wine term would be like the weight of the wine, the viscosity, the complexity. And usually people are basing it on like those lingering sensations tannin acid you know how long does it sit in your cheeks on your tongue stuff like that the finish of the wine you know how much it stains your teeth and what's cork taint cork taint jim has got oxygen's gotten through the cork yep oxidization exactly and that's when the cork you can't even notice it sometimes that you know air got into it and that could make a wine taste like vinegar um really gross like penny like so you you know pretty well um and then the screw top versus cork i love screw tops like

i'm pro screw top whenever i do like tastings or when I was in the serving industry, like I always just get, you know, nervous and I break my corks like every time because people are watching you, you have to do it like in the air, you don't have a table, you know, and you're talking. So to me, like the corks are a pain in the butt. I'm all for screw tops. As far as I know, in research, there's not, there's not been proven research that one is better or worse than the other i just think the cork will always be that like cultural like wine aspect especially for the old world italy spain and france like smelling the cork all that shit like when people would smell their cork i'd be like do you need like a room with your cork like i'm gonna go now what i tell you what you using

a waiter's friend not like a big one not a wine one with the two handles like an old school waiter's friend that is a skill i have in the world i will i will get a no cork in no thing the the the spark the the corkscrew will go in there without touching the side i'm excellent at that yeah i worked at an italian restaurant one of us i worked at an italian restaurant and i had and and there was a lot of wine there and that was the first two or three weeks I would like shit my people would order these very expensive

bottles and they just sit there and watch you they just stare at you and you're like you're shaving the little thing you gotta go within an angle before you think and then go after it I mean by the end of working there yeah people tell me that I didn't cut the lip of the bottle like

the foil part clean enough and like they had me go back and it was not even like a high-end restaurant and I'm like these fuckers I would cut this up but in the end I just pull that top bit off just like that and then I'd have a bit and I'd get going but I can do that properly I want her

eventually to teach us all how to saber. What's saber? I thought you were saying saver earlier. Oh, that's for getting off the champagne. She teaches those. I get champagne out well as well. I don't make the pop, I just do the pop. Yeah, I can do that.

Do you know how to saber? I want to be able to do that. So we'll get a lesson with you sometime and we'll film it for Patreon. I can open wine, man. You give me some cheap old wine. I won't fuck up one of them. That was a question we missed. How long does it last once it's open?

He said two days if Kelly's around seconds. Yeah, I think you brought this up too. There's so many like wine saver gadgets out there. So it's going to depend on what's going on. But typically, I keep it simple. If you're using the cork or the screw top, I usually say for ultimate freshness, two to three days. And especially if you're serving it in the restaurant industry, barely two days is what we'd serve a paid person. Up to a week. So it really can last up to a week so it's like it really can last up to a week it's not going to be as flavorful but it will take longer than that to actually go bad

so that's for still wine rosé white red for sparkling wine bubbles i say day one because even if you have a champagne class for stopper the next day the bubbles are always more dissipated do you believe putting the uh spoon yeah spoon? Yeah, that's a spoon trick. Oh, yeah. The spoon trick works. Have I told the Liam Gallagher story? But the spoon is you just put the spoon in. You put a spoon or a fork.

Yeah, apparently like the metal prolongs the bubbles or something. Yeah. Okay. And then I think we got to all the questions. We jumped around. I'm just looking through them. Yeah. Missy Younglefin. Yeah. Okay. And then, uh, I think we got to all the questions. We jumped around. I'm just looking through them. Yeah. Missy Yunglefin. Yeah. Okay. Uh, and then, Oh,

are all wines age Jim said, of course, everything's age, whether it's a minute or five months. Yeah. I mean, to begin with, sure. I mean, the only one I could think of that actually doesn't go through any aging is Beaujolais Novez. So the third Thursday or fourth Thursday, I forget of November every year, there's this wine called boat coming out of Beaujolais Nové. So the third Thursday or fourth Thursday, I forget, of November every year, there's this wine called coming out of Beaujolais called Gamay. I talked about it a little bit. And Beaujolais Nové, they basically harvested the grapes bottled or fermented bottled within

like a month or two, and then put in a mass production. And it's just this light, fruity, like easiest, basically grape juice of a wine by being like a smidge alcohol. So that's like the one exception. Other than that, like aging wine, like, you know, putting it in your cellar or whatever depends on the wine, you know, easy red wines are a little bit more age where the white wines typically are age worthy unless they have oak. Um, so like a Chardonnay or a Vionier or something like that. I've always had, there's a rhyme that I always say to remember that. The third Wednesday of November, Beaujolais, you will remember. Wow. Oh, that's so good.

I love that. Isn't it Thursday? I don't know. It's Thursday. Did I say Wednesday? No, no. The third Thursday. The third Thursday of November, Beaujolais, you will remember.

Drink it quickly. It will make you sick. But fruitiness, you will always remember. Drink it quickly. It will make you sick. But fruitiness you will always pick. Damn! That was good. That's good. Alright, this is the part of our show

we call Dinner Party Facts. We ask our expert to give us a fact that's obscure or interesting that people can use to impress at a dinner party. Is this specifically a good one? Because people will be drinking wine at a dinner party. This is specifically a good one because people will be drinking wine at a dinner party. You know that most wine has traces

of cum. Well, let's try a different one. Only if you're drinking at your house. Is it like if you're attending the dinner party or hosting it or both? Both. Just any fun fact about wine. I'll make it easy for you. It's a

surprise party for you at your house. So you're doing both. We just call it dinner party. It's just something you could be at a bar or something, but if the subject ever came up of wine, you could be like, oh, did you know XYZ? Yeah, you're talking to a boring person. You have to have something to say. Immediately,

that makes you look classy is if you have a decanter out like if you're decanting your red wine it's looking at that beautiful decanter and you know why you're decanting which is why it which would be like the age of it it's an older bottle so saying hey this is a 2012 it's really going to thrive from decanting because it's been you know trapped in this bottle for so many years it needs to breathe the tannins and the acid needs to mellow out so kind of talking about that aeration so being able to like swirl it you know one-handed you know in the air and not on the table and being able to like pick up on something on the nose other than grapes or red wine so i always tell people red wine you'll sound like a pro you just give like a dark fruit and something like smoky,

like tobacco leaf. There you go. You're a genius. White wine, give like a crisp fruit, like a lemon, crisp apple. And then for a non-fruit, say like white blossom. There you go. You'll be good. So give me the full fruit.

That's how you get laid. How does the lemon get into it? Is this all wood? Where's the lemon come from? You just say it. Apple. Say apple. There's no apple in it. We just said there's no apple in it.

Just trying to get loose. And also, we didn't do the oxidize. So you do that. I was right on that question. You switched it around. I don't know. How long do you aerate it? How long is it? Anywhere from... Decanters are separate from

aerators. So decanter, you guys know what I'm talking about, like base that you pour the wine in. So if you're going to pour your wine in that, minimum 30 minutes up to two hours. Aerators are those little pops you could easily put onto any bottle of wine and that's just immediate.

You put it on the top and then pour your wine and it's basically aerating as you pour it. So that's like the lazy pack i use i have a decanter in my house like one of those bowls with a thing and a big bottom at the thing like this so i reckon if i ever have like a wine party in like i don't know six years or something like that i'm gonna pour i'm gonna pour i'm gonna pour the wine out but i'm gonna have a face mask over the hole and i'm just gonna pour the wine out, but I'm going to have a face mask over the hole. And I'm just going to pour it through the face mask. It's a 2020.

Please do that. That's how you get the COVID out. Well, if you want to follow Samantha on Instagram, it's Samantha Sommelier. And also her website is SamanthaSommelier.com. So if you have like a group of friends and you want to do a virtual tasting, you can go on there and sign up for that. And she will provide that service for you. That sounds like a fun thing you could do. Now with the virtual tasting, do you send the people the wine?

Do you tell them what wines to buy? How does this work? Yeah, good question. So I have a online wine shop that could ship directly to them if they choose to order online. They want to pick up the wines locally from like Trader Joe's or their own, you know, custom wine shop. I'll pick up the wines for them and send them the bottle links and stuff like

that. So super easy to do that as well. So that's a fun thing you can do, even as you know, pandemic times, or if you have friends across the world or whatever, you'll get together online and you drink wine together and get drunk. And you can learn how to saber.

Yeah. Saber. Kelly loves that. I wanted to do it for this episode, but. Samantha Capaldi, thank you for being here. Thank you for being on the podcast, Samantha. I really appreciate it. Thank you guys for having me.

That was so fun. We all learned something. If you're ever at a party and someone comes up to you and goes, this wine tastes of elderflower and hints of lemon, go, I don't know about that, and walk away. Goodnight, Australia.