I Will Teach You To Be Rich - 29. “I never know when spending money on something will be an issue with him”

Episode Date: February 8, 2022

Brad and Becca are in debt. Lots of it. Together they make $105,000 a year, but Brad makes impulsive flash purchases on credit cards. There is no saving, no long-term plan–only short bursts of grati...fication.  This is not how you build a Rich Life. I want to get them out of this unsophisticated loop with money, but is Brad finally willing to listen?  Connect with Ramit Website Instagram Twitter Facebook YouTube Linkedin If you and your partner have a money issue and you want my help, I occasionally select a couple to work with, free of charge. Apply for my help here. Produced by Crate Media.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 When it comes to money, I like to save and have a plan for the future, which doesn't include a lot of debt. That's just not how I operate. Becca actually said, if we don't get this fixed, this could have some long-term repercussions. And that's scary to hear. Probably been together over half of our lives and to hear that for the first time shook me to my core a little bit. That's what started our one and a half
Starting point is 00:00:31 to our conversation is I was like, I want to live. I'm tired of not living. I want to go and do things and I think we could go and do things but I also want to enjoy them while I'm doing them. I don't want to, should I order a glass of champagne or Or am I going to regret that later? Because he's going to ask me why I ordered a glass of champagne. Auto loan, 35,000. What kind of car do you have?
Starting point is 00:00:52 Please don't tell me it's a Ford truck. It is a truck that is not for us. I knew it. How much did this truck cost? 50,000? 50,000 dollars? You cannot afford a 50,000 dollar car when you make a hundred and 15,000? Mm-hmm. You cannot afford a $50,000 car when you make $115,000. I got some great feedback from you that you wanted to hear more couples on my podcast with different incomes and different networks, not just millionaires who aren't sure how to spend their money. And we listened.
Starting point is 00:01:24 Today, I'm talking to Brad and Becca. They've been married for eight years and they have three children. Brad and Becca are in debt. They have a $290,000 mortgage, a $35,000 car loan, a $25,000 RV loan, and around $10,000 in credit card debt. Brad is the primary earner and Becca works part-time. Together, they make $105,000, but Brad feels overwhelmed with their financial situation. His wife, Becca, has noticed how Brad behaves around money. He'll feel anxiety one day, and the next day, he'll convince himself it's all fine and he'll
Starting point is 00:02:05 go out and make a major purchase, often putting it on credit cards. In today's episode, you're going to hear me speak to someone who can't afford his lifestyle. And this is a different type of conversation than you normally hear from me, but I believe it's important. I'm Rameet Saytee and and this is, I will teach you to be rich. I'm Rameet Saytee, and this is, I will teach you to be rich. Becca and I had a discussion, actually just standing up in the kitchen
Starting point is 00:02:36 for probably hour and a half, two hours about my feelings around money and how it affects our relationship. It usually comes up every few months. Typically, it's the same discussion, ends the same way where I'm going to try to work on my feelings around money. But this was the first time where Becca actually said,
Starting point is 00:02:57 if we don't get this fixed, this could have some long-term repercussions. And that's scary to hear. We have a long relationship. We've been married for almost eight years. We dated a long time before that. So probably been together over half of our lives and to hear that for the first time
Starting point is 00:03:15 shook me to my core a little bit. So we've always talked about it, but it's probably been the last couple of years where we've noticed my emotions around money and how it affects Becca and how it can spill into other areas of my life. What do you think changed two years ago for you to start really talking about money more seriously, more negatively? Having kids.
Starting point is 00:03:42 We have three kids and they're all young. And once they got older to where we could start doing things with them, I started looking at things that I wanted to do, that we wanted to do with the kids. Travel in particular, take them places, Disney World, Grand Canyon, Europe. And that's when I started trying to really address what we need to do to get to that point. And I think that's when I started seeing more of how I struggle with money emotionally, mentally, that type of thing.
Starting point is 00:04:19 I won't say that he missed managers, but he manages, manages, manages, and he feels good, feels good, he feels good, and then he panics, and he goes off the rails, and he's constantly, we don't have it for that, we can't do that, we can't do this. But then a couple of days later, it's like he's back on the horse again, and he's ready to just live life.
Starting point is 00:04:38 And so it's a roller coaster, which is a little bit hard to keep up with. And you never know when you're spending money, and it's gonna become an issue. And I just need help dealing with the internal feelings that I have because I know that it does bleed over. If I have a day where I'm stressed about money, no matter how hard I try, there's just something about my aura or the demeanor. And when I walk into the door that's, you know, he's probably worried about money and it just, it's not good.
Starting point is 00:05:09 And I hate that. I like to leave work at the door and I wish I could leave this at the door to enjoy the limited time that I do have with our kids. He just goes really far into the, we can't, we don't, and the negative side of it. But then he's like, I wanna get a new TV, and then we end up with a new television.
Starting point is 00:05:27 But last month, we didn't have the money for that new television. So where did it come from? And it's just, he's reframed it for himself. And what is the effect of this on you? Often times I find myself making decisions on how I spend money based off of his emotion. As opposed to, do I really want it?
Starting point is 00:05:42 Or do I really wanna do it? It's how is Brad going to respond? And then I end up not doing it or not buying it. Okay. Brad, what do you think about Becca's characterization? Is that true? Yeah, absolutely. I know for a fact that how I feel around money and how it can affect me absolutely prevents Becca from doing the things that she wants to do, living her rich life. I understand that you wanted to buy a shed. First of all, what is a shed? I have to ask, listen, I lived in a high-rise in Manhattan. I just want to make sure I know what we're even talking about here. A shed, like where you put your tools in the backyard,
Starting point is 00:06:26 is that what we're talking about? Yep. Tools, toys. You put toys in a shed? Yes. How many toys you have? Well, we have three kids. Okay.
Starting point is 00:06:37 Even with the shed, probably half of the garage because we have a garage is filled with toys. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Okay, we're going to get back to the shed. And I know I'm going to hear from about 100,000 people who live in places where people have sheds making fun of me for not knowing what a shed is. I accept your criticism. You have so many toys for three young kids that it takes up half your garage and part
Starting point is 00:07:04 of the shed. Did I hear that right? You did, yes. Yeah, but I'm sure it sounds worse than it is. I mean, you're talking like a power wheel. Like the little, the little, the cars that little kids can drive. They're four and six. Okay, listen, if you're going to write me to make fun of me for not knowing exactly what
Starting point is 00:07:21 a shed is, screw it. I deserve it. But more importantly, what I was trying to do there was to get a sense for why he wants a shed. I have a hunch from talking to lots of people who struggle with money. A lot of people who overspend also have a huge amount of stuff. You walk into their house and they have candles, they have piles of paper, they have three video game systems. It's just stuff everywhere. You rarely see that in households with much higher incomes. I was trying to find out if my suspicion was correct.
Starting point is 00:08:00 Based on their answers though, I can't say if my guess was right or wrong, but I'm making a mental note and I'm going to keep looking for clues. So you've got your garage, you've got your car, you decided you wanted a shed, and what was the conversation like, did you say we're going to Home Depot, we're going to buy one or we're going to build one, like how did this conversation start? So we've been having the conversation for years about we need a shed, we need a shed. And then two years ago, we decided to just go ahead
Starting point is 00:08:34 and do it, but we waited for a low's promotional period. We have a low's card from years ago and so we bought the lumber and everything we need to build the shed. I like to build things, my dad built things. So we stick built it, we didn't buy a pre-made one because they're cheap. She's just cost.
Starting point is 00:09:02 How much does this lumber cost? So when everything's said and done, we'll be in it for $2,500. So we didn't save up for it. We financed it like we discussed. And so I have ever since I can remember having a job, I've always had a credit card. The last time I can remember ever saving for anything was when I was a kid. And my parents told me if I wanted a TV, I needed to say for it. But once I was introduced to credit cards and found out I could get something now immediately and pay it off every time. That's been my go to.
Starting point is 00:09:44 But then when we have credit card debt that we already have to pay for, throw this on top where yeah, you can pay $30 a month, but at the end of the promotional period, you've got to make some larger payments, or you're going to be paying the interest, and then throw other promotional cards on top of that. Suddenly, you're having to make significant credit card payments every month just so you pay it off in time. And that's where my anxiety kicks in is that we can barely afford to buy the groceries that we need, put gas in the car because we've got these credit card bills that we need to pay.
Starting point is 00:10:26 Ding, ding, ding. This is the second clue that tells you Brad is unsophisticated with money. The clue is Brad telling us that he puts purchases on his credit card instead of paying them in full. He even mentions using a 0% promotional period. This is a classic tell for people who are unsophisticated with money. Now, yeah, some people are very sophisticated. They can pay it all off and they intentionally take the 0% promotional
Starting point is 00:10:56 period for 12 months and then they pay it off. Why? Because they can make more money in the market blah, blah, blah. But that's not how it's typically used. Typically it's unsophisticated people who cannot afford what they're buying. And so they take these promotional periods and they think they're beating the system, but really they're just gambling that they can figure out a way to pay off their credit card before the interest kicks in. It's a gimmick and they fell for it. You want something and then you don't get it for a long time,
Starting point is 00:11:29 you think about it, ruminate about it, finally get it, and then you start to feel bad afterwards. I think so, yeah. When I first got a job after college, I couldn't decide on a floor mat for inside the door. Cause I just was overwhelmed, didn't want to make the wrong decision. So you're at the store, you're looking at the floor mat
Starting point is 00:11:53 aisle at Target or wherever, you see like 30 different floor mats, what goes through your head at that moment? I just couldn't make a decision. And I think as silly as it seems, I was worried I'd make the wrong decision. And it wasn't 30. It was two. It was two. It was two. Like this one or this one. Why were you worried about making the wrong decision? What does wrong mean to you?
Starting point is 00:12:14 That I didn't choose the optimum. I didn't pick the best. If you had made a better decision, that would have meant what? That I didn't make a mistake. And what kind of person makes a mistake? Unintelligent. Mm. Now, when I say Brad is unsophisticated with money, I'm not judging him.
Starting point is 00:12:39 I'm being descriptive, not prescriptive. Brad isn't sophisticated with money. That's fine. We all start somewhere. I'm not sophisticated with cooking French food. Okay? No judgment. It just is what it is. But what's strange is that until recently Becca had been handling their finances. In fact, later in our conversation, it turns out that she works part-time as a bookkeeper. In other words, she is sophisticated with money. And she was doing a pretty good job. But at a certain point, she handed that job over to Brad and then things got worse.
Starting point is 00:13:16 I'm confused Becca, because you were doing this, you understood it, you were handling it, and then you handed over the budget to him. How come? handling it and then you hand it over the budget to him. How come? Because of the emotional, it was causing arguments by him not being as involved, which the better thing hindsight is just get him involved and show him, but it just was leading to arguments. Every time we talked about money, it was leading to arguments. So I said, fine, then you do the budget and you'll see that it's going, okay,
Starting point is 00:13:46 he didn't understand. His brain works different. Okay, so your response was like, I'm tired of fighting. You do it. You basically shove it over to him. And let me guess, you didn't get the reaction you thought. You didn't get the outcome you wanted. No, I did not.
Starting point is 00:14:02 He didn't really take it. He just, what a surprise. Yeah, he's still it. He just... Yeah, what a surprise. Yeah, he still used that checking account as the gauge of our success. And I'm like, look, tomorrow something came out early. It's okay. That's why we have a buffer in the checking account. That's why we have savings and investments and things like that. Yeah. Again, this stuff is not that complicated. But there has to be a foundation and just shoving a spreadsheet at someone.
Starting point is 00:14:27 It doesn't work, as you learn. So by him checking all the time in the wrong place, I was like, I don't know what to tell you. The money's coming, it's there. It's not in the checking account right now because that's not how I set it up. That a checking account isn't a savings account. So money goes from there. It's not meant I set it up. That a checking account isn't a savings account.
Starting point is 00:14:45 So money goes from there. It's not meant to have thousands and thousands of dollars and it's meant to have what you're paying for. And then, and then so when he was using that, it says, gauge, I'm like, I can't, I don't know what to tell you. I get it. It's driving me insane to even imagine these conversations.
Starting point is 00:15:00 If it were me, I have all these flows and stuff. And if somebody was pinging me every four days, saying, why isn't this here? I'm like, do you understand how sophisticated my flows are? Look at the model that I built. It's all there. Of course, that's not very productive. I get it.
Starting point is 00:15:17 So, Brad, do you understand the concept, like, if, well, you have kids. So let's say that, you know, your baby isn't crawling at six months exactly. And I came up to you and I go, when's she gonna crawl? When's she gonna crawl? It's six months, it's six months in one day. How do you think you would feel
Starting point is 00:15:37 if I did that every four days? And get it annoying. We've experienced that actually, we have a niece who's very close to an age by only a few days off from one of our kids. And we were always getting that comparison. Yeah, it's annoying. And it makes you defensive.
Starting point is 00:15:57 And also, what does it matter? If it's six months in one day or seven months, eventually, baby's gonna crawl. So Brad, you got this spreadsheet from Becca. And let me take a wild guess at how many times you open that spreadsheet after she sent it to you. Is the number zero? He created his, he without looking at the one
Starting point is 00:16:16 that I sent, he created his own. Okay, that's interesting. And Brad, how come you did that? What was your thinking behind that? That's interesting and Brad, how come you did that? What was your thinking behind that? In case I would think of something that she didn't, ultimately I compared the two, but I thought that I was more likely to think of something if I had nothing to go off. If I look at one that's been put together, I felt that there was a better chance that
Starting point is 00:16:42 I would overlook something that maybe Becca overlooked too. Like, you can't trust somebody to mow your lawn and you can't trust your wife to build the spreadsheet. Any similarities? It sounds like there is. I trust my wife more than anybody in the world. I know you trust her. Obviously, you trust her. You know, she's your wife and she's mom of the children. But did you see what her face looked like when you were talking about how you built your own model? No, I didn't. Okay, Becca, you want to tell him? It was a look of, I'm sure you did build your own model. It kind of undermines. It's a look of, I'm sure you did Vildredron model. You, it kind of undermines. It's a little bit, it's undermining,
Starting point is 00:17:29 and it doesn't make you feel good that, okay, well, I've been using this for months to keep a gauge on our finances, and then you can't even look at it and you got a Vildredron. So it just makes you feel like you don't trust me. What do you see, Brad? Yeah, I see probably other areas that I may do that
Starting point is 00:18:00 where she may have a way of doing things and rather than implement her way, I just do it on my own. Start from scratch. And what percentage of the way do you get when you implement it on your own? 80 percent. Mm-hmm. Maybe. Anybody else in your life that got 80% of the way there? My dad. And then it becomes one more item when you're to-do list.
Starting point is 00:18:33 Mm-hmm. How many credit cards do you have? Probably around 10. That's yet another clue of how Brad and Becca, like so many of us, are not particularly sophisticated with money. Brad doesn't review his spending regularly. Together they have a ton of credit cards. In fact, I bet I know what kind of cards they have.
Starting point is 00:18:54 There's not that many with balances on there, but he's also including store cards. Yeah, never get a store card. Remember what I said in my book? Don't ever get a store card. Let me guess, would you have a gap or an old Navy card as well? Which one? That was me, but we haven't used that.
Starting point is 00:19:10 I knew it. Yeah. Everybody who has bad financial situations has a gap or an old Navy card. What else? Just tell me right now. Hold on, hold on, hold on. I'm gonna guess.
Starting point is 00:19:21 You have a gas credit card. No, I don't. No, okay, I stand corrected. And Amazon. We do have gas credit card. No, I don't. No, okay, I stand corrected. And Amazon. We do have an Amazon card. Okay, that one's okay, but what else? It's paid off monthly. It's paid off monthly.
Starting point is 00:19:32 It's just very evolving. What else? What's the one you don't want to tell me about? Best Buy. Oh my God. And I have. What did you say? You saved $13 on some purchase like 10 years ago?
Starting point is 00:19:43 Well, I used to work there. That doesn't mean you have to get their credit card, but okay, what else do you have? Loads. Yeah. And then we have, I've had an American Express, that was the first credit card I've ever had. And I still have that.
Starting point is 00:19:57 It's a Hilton card. I used to travel a lot for work. And I was able to charge to that and earn the points. How many points you still have now? We still have about, we just use them. I think we have about 150,000. But it was up to a million at one point. Yeah, well, that Hilton card is going by by as well.
Starting point is 00:20:16 All right, so you have a bunch of cards that you don't need to have. A lot of these cards aren't even that good of cards. So we're going to act those real quick. But what else do we need to do? Because you're papering over the real issues here. Yeah, we'll get the credit card debt taken care of you'll close these horrible cards But what's gonna happen two months from now when we're not talking and you're sitting there saying oh my god I need to repair the fence and you know, it's gonna cost me six grand and on and on and on What do you think's gonna happen? They're on a card again. Yeah, and why? It's not just the fact that you have credit cards. You're gonna have credit cards.
Starting point is 00:20:54 What is it? I get it now. Yeah, I don't have to wait for it. Maybe at gratification. What is the benefit of waiting for something to pay for it in full when you can get it now and pay the same amount in the end? Now I know the answer. What is it? It's not having the anxiety if we save up the cash and we pay for the shed and cash. I wouldn't have that guilt or the anxiety around paying it off years later. But is there a butt here? I don't think there's a butt there. Then why didn't you do it?
Starting point is 00:21:33 Because we didn't have the money. And that's why you save up for it. Well, we weren't saving. Yes, bingo. I think that, I feel like that I was held to a pretty high standard. I'm the oldest and I didn't want to disappoint anyone. How many kids in your family?
Starting point is 00:21:50 I'm one of three. Okay. So when you say held to a higher standard, tell me about that. I think that, and it was probably just something that I projected, that just because I was the oldest and had the most years compared to my siblings, that I was just expected to be better. I don't think that was intentional. My parents were great parents, so it's not something that they did, but I just felt like that if I screwed up, it was a big deal.
Starting point is 00:22:23 Both of my brothers got their first TV given to them. Didn't have to work for it. That was one of the first things, probably the last thing that I think I ever saved up for. Because if you want this, you need to save up for it. The uncomfortable truth is that for millions and millions of people, they simply do not plan for anything financial whatsoever. They simply don't save. If they see something they want, they buy it, and
Starting point is 00:22:52 then they deal with it later. And you'll see this impulsivity in other parts of their lives as well. If they invest, which many of them don't, they'll impulsively buy hot stocks. And then the instant it goes down, they'll sell it. I also have not been able to correlate this to other parts of their lives. Some people are excellent parents, which obviously requires lots of long term thinking. Some of them have really healthy lifestyles, which requires long term thinking, but with money for whatever reason, they're impulsive and short term oriented. By contrast, I really love speaking to people with a long term focus on their finances. They have a healthy savings account. They know what they're saving and what they're investing for.
Starting point is 00:23:36 Some of them even have a 40 year time horizon, which allows them to accumulate serious wealth. If I asked them, would you ever buy something? If you didn't have the money in the bank to pay for it, they just look at me blankly. It's a totally different perspective on short-term versus long-term thinking. One of my money dials is generosity. For example, I love tipping big,
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Starting point is 00:27:40 BAKA BAKA BAKA BAKA BAKA BAKA BAKA BAKA BAKA BAKA BAKA BAKA Back to Brad, there's a lot more to unpack here. And I think Becca has helped me see that kind of continues that I'm held to a different standard. How so?
Starting point is 00:27:53 That I shouldn't make mistakes. I have a really hard time asking for help. And can you connect that with your upbringing at all? My dad, he did a lot of things around the house on his own. And he'd let us help out. I see that in myself. If we have stuff that we want done around the house, I'll say that I don't want to pay for it because I can do it for myself. Part of that is I have a hard time trusting people to do something well, even something as simple as cutting the grass. But then especially the projects we have around that Becca's wanted is a deck.
Starting point is 00:28:40 So she can go out back and sit with our kids and watch them play And that's something that I'm hell-bent on doing myself because I don't want to pay someone else to do it What if your dad had said I? Want to put a shed in the back and you said to him Why don't we just hire somebody to do it for us? What would your dad have said? I think he would have said I can do it myself. Maybe that we couldn't afford it. Is that true? Could you have afforded something like that? For me or for my parents?
Starting point is 00:29:14 For your parents. I don't know. Something that Becca and I have talked about is that I have no idea where my parents stood financially. We went to dinner with them a couple of years ago, and my parents offered to pay, and we got the check, and my dad, you'd think, well, way he reacted to the check that it was a $500 tab, and it was $80. I remember them asking us as kids,
Starting point is 00:29:42 if we wanted to move to a bigger house, or if we wanted to stay where we were at. So then they met with an architect, they drew up these fantastic plans. The house is going to be awesome. They were getting a bedroom off the back of the house. We were excited. I can't remember how well I was. But then I remember them saying that building material prices went up over the course of a few months. And now they couldn't afford what they wanted and that this is the best that they could do. I remember my dad installed the insulation so we wouldn't have to pay somebody for do that
Starting point is 00:30:17 to do that. He built the cabinets in the kitchen so we wouldn't have to pay somebody to do that. And it's been probably 20 years, maybe 15, 20 years since they started the addition. And it's still not done. Another characteristic that I see is it's a 80, 20 thing projects that my dad would work on. He'd get 80% of the way there. And then the last 20% it would either not get done
Starting point is 00:30:52 or it would take a long time to get done. Yeah, yeah. And it's just one more thing on your massive to-do list next to mowing the lawn and going to work and on and on and on. And we talk about paying people to do those things. But that's kind of get I feel trapped again because while we can't afford to pay somebody to finish this stuff, because we have these bills to pay. And now we've got all these things
Starting point is 00:31:25 that we want to do to the house, but we can't because we don't have the money for it. I can understand you using the word trapped. It does feel like you're trapped. You've got this project that's 80% of the way done. You want to finish it, but the tools are expensive. You can't hire anybody else. And there's a massive other to-do list of other stuff that's important too.
Starting point is 00:31:55 And you mentioned, hey, I'm concerned about having enough to fill up the tank of gas. Brett, what state or general area do you live in? So we live East Coast, Coast of Virginia Beach. Okay. I'm just asking because sometimes people pick up the financial values of the people around them. And I'm just curious about, know, some of these decisions like,
Starting point is 00:32:18 you've been in credit card debt for a long time. And I'm wondering, is that normal for the people in your community or the people around you? Do you feel like it's normalized in your family? And my family, yes. I know for a fact that my siblings have a credit card debt. This is very interesting. How do they talk about it? I don't, not the same way as me. It doesn't seem to stress them.
Starting point is 00:32:44 They, I mean, I don't ever really hear them talk about it in a negative way. It's just, yeah, if I have it, and I don't have any way to pay it off, but they don't have the emotional ties. Even if they can't pay it off, there's, there's no stress around that, which I don't think is a good thing either. Another clue here. In many ways, debt is contagious. If your friends and family have credit card debt, you're more likely to have it too. That's also for a variety of structural reasons, by the way. It doesn't just mean that credit card debt is like someone's perfume that rubs off on you.
Starting point is 00:33:21 But if you're surrounded by people who think credit card debt is normal, people who buy lots of stuff on incomes that can't support it, you might start to think it's normal too. Now that I've heard the background, I'm going to start giving Brad and Beck as some candid feedback. So this is not surprising. Do you both realize you're a product of your community and your upbringing? I'll just tell you point blank, while it may be statistically normal to have credit card debt in this country, it's not normal, okay?
Starting point is 00:33:55 In my opinion, it's not acceptable for somebody making $115,000 to have credit card debt. There's no reason for it. The fact that multiple people in your family have credit card debt. There's no reason for it. The fact that multiple people in your family have credit card debt, it's not surprising to me at all, because in many ways debt is contagious. The type of people who have debt surround themselves with others who have debt.
Starting point is 00:34:19 Not saying debt is always a choice. A lot of times it's just unforeseen circumstances, healthcare, student loans, etc. But the fact that we're talking about credit card debt, not student loan debt, credit card debt is very revealing. When it comes to money, I like to save and have a plan for the future, which doesn't include a lot of debt. That's just not how I operate.
Starting point is 00:34:47 Brad, what do you prepare to do to change? Anything. Okay. I would do anything. Okay, that's a good answer. Let's take a look at your debt. Student loans, $600. Okay.
Starting point is 00:34:59 Credit cards, $9,500. So what do we have on there? The shed, What else? The shed, last year we got a new TV and surround sound. That was something we got. There's probably a Disney World trip on there. It's a few years old and I can't even remember what all the debt was. Okay, let's keep going through the debt. You have an RV loan for $25,000. Auto loan, $35,000. What kind of car do you have?
Starting point is 00:35:31 Please don't tell me it's a Ford truck. It is a truck that is not Ford. Fuck, I knew it. What kind of truck is it? It's a RAM. Okay, and do you do work that involves you using a truck? No, no, you don't. Of course.
Starting point is 00:35:46 It's a pool of the RV, though. Oh, yeah. Exactly. You need to spend a bunch of money on an RV which then forces you to spend even more money to buy something that can pull that thing. You're right. How much did this truck cost, by the way, the total price of the truck? It was actually a good deal, but not good.
Starting point is 00:36:04 50,000 dollars. By the way, the total price of the truck. It was actually a good deal, but not a deal. Yeah. $50,000. Mm-hmm. You got 10 for my trade-in. Okay, another lesson from Remeteer. This is called Remete's Fables Tonight. Okay, I'm gonna impart some directive wisdom. You cannot afford a $50,000 car when you make $100,000
Starting point is 00:36:21 and $15,000. Okay, you cannot. This is crazy to me. How did you decide how much money you could afford to spend on this truck when you bought it? Let me guess, was it about the monthly payments? Yeah, ultimately. Oh, damn it.
Starting point is 00:36:37 I got pretty heated right there and I have to apologize to Brad and Becca. Sorry guys and I appreciate you sticking with me. Let me tell you why I got so mad though. These are some of the biggest reasons that many of you stay stuck in your financial situation. You worry and you agonize over three dollar coffees and then you go out and take loans to buy a $50,000 truck and an expensive trailer. Plus the $400 in gas it takes every month. And the worst of it is you bought these things based on the monthly payment. Guys, you have to stop doing this shit. This is how unsophisticated people act with money. First, they buy things based on monthly payments. Never do this. Sophisticated people look at the total cost of ownership.
Starting point is 00:37:25 If you buy a $50,000 truck, but your payments are only $350 a month, by the time you factor in all your interest and fees, that stupid truck might cost you $70, maybe $80,000. Oh, but Rameeth, maybe it's their rich life. You're just a coastal elite because you don't like trucks. You're coming down and judging other people. No, you can't just point at something you want and then use my concept of a rich life to justify it. You actually have to be able to afford it.
Starting point is 00:37:55 If you can't afford it, that's fine. Save your money. Use my earnable program to earn more. Start investing. But you don't get to just wave your hands and repeat rich life three times and then buy whatever you want. No, I don't care if it's a truck or a beach house or even one of my self-development programs. And another thing, let's talk about these fucking trucks.
Starting point is 00:38:18 Virtually every person I talk to in financial trouble has a truck. Why is that? When I asked them, they always have these logical reasons. One guy I talked to, he said, well, I needed to get up these steep hills in the winter. I was like, dude, what are you telling me? Grandma can't get up there in her four door Kia. Then they shift to something like, well, I need it for my trailer. No, you don't need a trailer. Finally, they just admit, I want a truck. And when I probe even more, why do you want a truck? They want a truck because everyone around them has a truck. It's fucking status. You guys spend all your
Starting point is 00:39:00 time on social media mocking Louis Vuitton bags as stupid status items, yet all of you owned these trucks. I looked it up in 48 out of 50 states, a truck or SUV is the most popular purchase. Now, I have a lot of compassion for people's spending and money dials and invisible scripts, but I have zero sympathy for people who buy huge trucks or SUVs and then get on social media to complain to pop a government about gas prices.
Starting point is 00:39:28 Take control of your life. This is what I'm talking about when I say you have to change your entire worldview. Unsophisticated people buy cars for the monthly payment. Unsophisticated people buy things, he's saying, well, I can afford to have it for 12 months without paying interest. Unsophisticated people buy things and say, I'm going to put it on credit and then I'll
Starting point is 00:39:49 figure it out later. No more of that. That's exactly what I do. Exactly. I'll figure it out later. Yeah, you're living the unsophisticated financial life. And then it's no surprise that you're stressed out. All the same people who walk in the
Starting point is 00:40:05 car dealer get swindled because they don't know any better by paying them on, oh, it's only 350 a month. Oh, they just didn't mention to you that it's 72 months of this, including a shitload of interest. I'm getting mad, not at you. I'm getting mad because I hate seeing unsophisticated people take an advantage of. I don't think you should have to be a master of personal finance to not get ripped off. That makes me angry to hear that you have been taught these things, and I will say it makes me a little angry that you haven't taken responsibility for this, but you are now, which I respect.
Starting point is 00:40:39 I just don't see a way out. Lots of listeners ask me to feature couples in different financial situations, not just multi millionaires. And today you got it. I'm very grateful that Brad and Becca are sharing their story with us. And I think for a lot of listeners, their situation is very relatable. Here's what we've heard so far. Brad is unsophisticated with money.
Starting point is 00:41:07 And instead of learning, he alternates between ignoring the problem and obsessing over it. Brad and Becca use all kinds of gimmicks, like 0% balance transfers, 10 credit cards, and car trade-ins. And if they keep going like this, it's pretty predictable where they'll end up. Just like tens of millions of other Americans, they'll be in debt, treading water, and frustrated, and being stuck. And finally, beyond the money, Brad and Becca are playing out parts of their upbringing. Their invisible scripts are highly reflective of what they saw in childhood. In the second part of my conversation, you'll hear us put together a plan for Brad and
Starting point is 00:41:54 Becca. You'll hear if they can commit to that plan. And you'll hear about the particular struggles they face, which I think you'll instantly recognize in your own life. Coming up next week on I Will Teach You To Be Rich, part two of my conversation with Brad and Becca. Thanks for listening. Thanks for listening to I Will Teach You To Be Rich.
Starting point is 00:42:22 I'm Remeded Saiti. Please follow the show on Apple, Spotify, or wherever you listen to podcasts. Head over to iWT.com slash podcast to find our entire back catalog of episodes and links to all the places you can listen. you

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