If I Were You - 10: eBay Game Boy

Episode Date: January 8, 2024

In this episode we discuss Jake's poetry, Jake's math skills, and Amir's singing ability.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a headgema original. One last ditch ever to try to stop the crib of going to shit. Seven, another podcast. Seven. Each app different from the last. Seven. It's the Swiss Army Nightbook show. Seven. Meet your two pathetic hosts.

Seven. Now let me to two pathetic holes So let's... You got your neck removed. Yeah. Yeah. I look cute. Your shoulders are really tight. If you guys are watching the YouTube version of this, Jake's troubles are always that my neck

made me look skinny. But now that it's gone, I actually look pretty beefed. No, it looks like you're just raising your shoulders really high. And now I'm reborn for a back baby. Let's get started. This is a new year, new segments. Whoa, it's 2020 was.

Yeah, recording in 2023, but releasing on in 2024. Yeah, it doesn't feel like a new year to me, but it's cool that it will feel like one to somebody listening. Exactly. And you are gonna try to keep this evergreen and future proof. So nothing that we mentioned should be too timely slash topical because at the end of the day It'll be the new of the year. Exactly. You should be able to listen to this in 2029 and be like, wow, all this stuff still rings true. Honestly, this should be playing from a fucking broken radio in 3926 on a hellscape. Yeah. And this is the only thing we can hear. And historians will

be translating this impossible to decipher language. Right. and they'll be like, wow, we can't even pin a place in time when this was because it's so evergreen once they decipher our language. Nice. Yeah. All right, you wanted to start with another rousing game of poetry or noetry. Oh, okay, yeah. Let's go ahead. So far, I've had two poems you sniffed

out. One was Sadie, the other one was Ha-un. Right. And I've had one poem that you sniffed out. I forget the name of it, but it was something like last gasp of summer or something last leaf. Yeah, there was, there was something about a new phrase. It's like when Summer lasts too long and you would just get it. Yes, yes, and I already forgot it actually. Oh, Goose Summer. One last Goose Summer. That's right, exactly.

Okay, so the twist on this one is that I found a real poem. I wrote a poem and I also coached chat GPT into writing a poem. Okay. So this is between a poet, me, and AI. I think you should try to assign the best, you're trying to guess which one I wrote, but it'd be really cool if you could guess all of them.

If you sign the right, yeah. That would be pretty impressive. I'd also like to hear you rank them just in terms of which ones you like. Even if you think that, you know, like for instance, you sniffed out the goose summer one. Yeah. You didn't ever say if you liked it more than any of the other ones that I wrote. I didn't, you know? Or, okay, yeah.

That I read, I meant to say. Yeah, that's why I had it as pegged as yours because it wasn't that good. Right. Got it. Okay. Cool. So this one is called Ha-un. Ha-un. Then Ha-un danced across the stage. Then Ha-un and Harry.

It's pretty, it is pretty iconic. I don't think it was a bad poem. I just knew it was you. Okay. All right. Try to rank Ha-un. Then Ha-ri. Then Ha-res. This one is called the quiet sanctuary of the woods.

Okay. The quiet sanctuary of the woods. Yeah. In the quiet sanctuary of the woods, where sunlight weaves through leaves like threads of introspection, a subtle hum of cancer disrupts the natural cadence. Amidst the rustling leaves and the distant calls of unseen creatures, the body's silent struggle unfolds, a delicate dance between vulnerability and resilience. In these wooded realms where Mary Oliver's spirit lingers, one finds solace in the intricate tapestry of life and within the unexpected challenges and profound truth, the strength to endure lies within the quietude of the forest embrace. All right, that one has AI vibes.

Yeah, for sure, but couldn't they all coached it to have something to do with cancer? Because I remember that was one of your buzz words, so one of the poems I read is actually thinking about lung cancer, some shit. Okay. Yeah, the crop circles. Yeah, the cancer, the coffee. Okay, so that one has AI vibes, but I'm not ready to commit quite yet. Yeah, the Mary Shelley thing kind of threw me off.

Right. Okay, this one is called the Swankinstein. No, Mary Oliver, it says Mary Oliver. Mary, I don't know who Mary Shelley is. Okay. Okay. The Swan. Did you see it drifting all night on the black river? Did you see it in the morning, rising, rising into the silvery air, an armful of white blossoms, a perfect commotion of silk and linen as it leaned into the bondage of its wings, a snowbank, a bank of lilies, biting the air with its black beak. Did you hear it, fluting and whistling? A shrill dark music like the rain pelting the trees, like a waterfall,

niphing down the black ledges. And did you see it finally just under the clouds, a white cross streaming across the sky, its feet like black leaves, its wings, like the stretching light of the river, and did you feel it in your heart, how it pertained to everything, and have you to finally figured out what beauty is for, and have you changed your life? Jesus, there was a lot of metaphors, a lot of questions. Like this, that and the other, like linen, like a cross, have you done it? Have you seen it? Have you changed your life? Okay. It's a lot. It was pretty good, actually.

You liked it. That one didn't feel like something you wrote. Like, how would you come up with fucking swans in a sky? And the questions, I don't know, it felt very unique. Mm-hmm, yeah, sure. Thank you. So right now I'm getting AI vibes from the first, real poet vibes from the second.

And now let's read this one, which is what about fucking... This one is called a shit. Ha-un continue. Ha-tune, the serisin walks his girlfriend down the aisle. Harrison walks in on Harry Jirkin. This one is called the poem. The poem.

The poem. Okay, yeah. Really feels like he's so far, but he's so far. Yeah. I'm sad, so I write a poem happily. I compose a poem out of boredom. I return to my unfinished poem. Sun, rain, sun shower, light breaking through the pages.

Atomic daybreak. The neighbors rise. They walk to work. I sit thinking of the last line. Then it comes to me. Okay. Clever, almost comedic. I mean, my initial hunch is AI real you. I guess there's a chance the AI is writing one about writing a poem, like a poem about

a poem is like, with the prompt you gave it. I will say it's very subtle the differences. It's like colorblindness test, where I'm like, I think that one's green and that one's brown, but like it's getting really similar. Are you talking about just the AI and the last, like, are you talking about AI and me? Are you thinking all three poems are very similar? All three poems are like different shades of grade of me. Like one doesn't stand out.

When I read a good one to you and you're like, that one made me cry, I know that one's real. I don't have that. I couldn't disagree more because there was one poem that I was reading and I was like shaking a little bit and I had goosebumps.

So I know that my poem is dog shit and the other one is amazing. I'm poem blind. I don't know how else to tell you this. I'm poem blind. I don't get it. I don't understand. I can't sniff them out.

All right. But maybe deep within me as a human, I can figure it out. And the hunches that I'm receiving, I actually read this down poem wise. The hunches that I receive, so deep down, Hunches, resonating. So deep.

My favorite part of this game is how uncertain we are that one of us wrote the poem and then once we're sure it's like, let's read it again now that I fucking down. That I know you're a loser and you spent time trying to write Christian sentence wrong one now just so that wouldn't be dissected. It's like actually that one's the real poem. Okay. The last one felt simple in a way that I think it was either you or the AI. The first one remind me was not the first one. It was the quiet solitude of the forest. Yeah. That was the quiet thanks to where I had the woods.

Yeah, I'll go. I think I'm gonna stick with my hunch. That one just felt like this is what a poem is according to an algorithm, light going through leaves and the guy I have cancer to and Mary Shelley's here for some fucking reason. Yeah, so that was AI. I coached it to write in the style of Mary Oliver,

who is one of my favorite poets. So that one, I was correct about that. That is correct. That is AI. And instead of writing in Mary Oliver's style, well, I guess they kind of did because, you know, she writes about nature a lot. But he just named drops her, which isn't ideal.

I hadn't read that part. When I read that my heart sank, I was like, this is a bad poem, chat GPT. You did a bad job. So yeah, I did try to get the chat GPT to write a poem. I believe I said about cancer and the changing of seasons in the style of Mary Oliver. Got it.

So I was sort of, I was in on that hunch, that was correct. And now it's down to the last two. One of them is just like, I can't imagine you wrote this one about swans flying and have you done this and have you done that. And then the last one's a cheeky little, ooh, I'm going to write a poem. And now I sit to write the last line, real fucking clever. Yeah. It was really clever. I wonder if I wrote it or a poet wrote it There's only one way to find out

I think I'm gonna stick with my original hunch you wrote the last one a real poem wrote poet wrote the Storks one That is correct Mary Oliver herself wrote the swan an incredibly moving poem and I Farted out the poem just before we started to record a poem about a poem and yes We will start from the top. What was the first line? I'm sad. So I write a poem. Yeah You know this one is this is it's not a bad poem. It's not perfect. But I think it's not bad. I'm sad. So I read it. It can be it. It harkened me to like a middleing poem in like where the sidewalk ends. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That's I mean, I feel like that's pretty solid for my second ever poem for Shell Silverstein. Yeah. Like that guy worked all year on something that's sounds like what you farted out

in that fucking waiting room. All right, let's see. I'm sad. So I write a poem. Yeah. Happily, I compose a poem out of boredom. I returned to my unfinished poem. Sun, rain, sun, shower, light breaking through the pages. Now that was where I started to get a little artsy. You know, light breaking through the pages is good. Yeah. The first kind of life, like, you know, rain or shine,

but then I'm like, how do I make it a little weirder, you know, rain, sun, and then I added the sun shower thing. Yeah. Which I thought might trip you up, because I don't know any time you've ever heard me say sun shower. But I guess, I guess it's good. What just weather in general is a go-to for us.

I liked the next line, which is just atomic daybreak, but it doesn't really make sense in this poem. And I feel like that also might have tipped my hand, because it definitely speaks to my spirit. Yes. The neighbors rise, they walk to work. Tell me if you think my previous iteration was the baker rises before the dawn.

That sounds like a song or like a dark night. The night is darkest before the dawn or something. Yeah, okay, so I'm glad I changed it. I'm glad I changed it. Again, I still knew who your poem was, but yeah. Yeah, the neighbors rise, they walk to work. I sit thinking of the last line, then it comes to me. I mean, what a sweet little twist to death.

A smirk, a smile gleaming your eye. A cheeky little tear rolls down your face. I said, stick the dick in my ass. And I sit on a desk to write this shit out. And it goes a little something like poem. I'm writing a poem every day. And I think of a poem. And the second one is one you like. Something about Storks flying through this guy. Yeah, Mary Oliver. Actually, one of her poems was read at my wedding. I almost wanted to read that one, but I thought you might have remembered it.

Oh, yeah, probably not. You probably wouldn't have, huh? It's just so hard to come up with a poem that doesn't sound like something we would, like everything that comes through my brain is something that comes from my brain, and I can't change it. It's like, all right, what about one about me walking?

No, that's what you would think of. It's like, yeah, everything is one. And I could have in theory just come up with one about Storks, but I would never. I don't know why. Yeah, you would, I guess the best thing we could do is probably just pleasureize and change everything just a little bit.

Yeah, but that's not in the spirit of the game. I wanna come up with a poem that's so originally on me. But then it's that, but you tried to do it with how- You tried to do it with how- You tried to do it with how- But we knew it because then you dipped into school by accident. You love math and school. It'll always come out. And me, I like weather.

I'm obsessed with the sun and the seasons and the the bakers and the candlestick bakers always. I have. Yeah, we have to come up. We have to write a poem that not a single one of the lines is is true to us That's how you write poetry The worst thing a poet teacher can a poet teacher can tell you is like all right What's completely unnatural to you and dig into that? How can you be your most inauthentic self?

Write a poem as somebody else. Don't be yourself. Be some try to fool the poetry. All right, over four. The game continues. The game continues. The game continues. All right, you just said something in the last segment that reminded me of this segment,

which was I like math, I like school. Yeah. So we just spent about 15 minutes in your wheelhouse, AKA English writing. That's true. Creative. Yes. There are no right answers.

Mm-hmm. Let's shift gears so severely that people will get intellectual fucking whiplash. Yes. Do you remember taking the ISEE test? Did you ever take a private school entrance exam in like fifth grade? No, I wouldn't have taken a private school entrance exam. But I think, I mean, we took like math placement tests.

Yeah. Got into fifth grade. I remember when I was applying to seventh grade schools, which is kind of fun to do imagine, like I had to apply to get into a difficult middle school. I would take these ISEE exams, where it's like you throw a 12 year old in a room, be like, all right, let's see how smart he is. And my scores weren't good enough to get into the schools that my brothers went to. Really? Wow, and you're pretty smart.

Pretty smart, but I didn't do well in these exams. I remember in like fifth and sixth grade, like my friends would get like eights and nines out of nine, and I would get like fives and sixes. Wow. All right. So this is gonna be hard. Well, it's easy for me now because it's tests

given to fifth and sixth graders to get into sixth and seventh grade. But that's something that is going to be impossible for me. Yeah, some of them are hard and a little convoluted and I'm going to stick to the math ones because reading comprehension is just like read this paragraph and I'm going to ask you what this guy was thinking. That's not what we're at. Yeah, that one I would probably kill at.

Yeah, you would kill at that one. Let's start with something easy. This is quantitative reasoning for lower level ISEE. It's a practice exam. Okay, so this is like if this and this is that and this and this is that. It's more like word problems but math. So for example,

here's an easy one to start. A total of 28 students were asked, which one of three snacks, ice cream popsicles are frozen yogurt, they preferred. 17 students preferred ice cream. Four preferred popsicles. How many students preferred frozen yogurt? Okay, so at 17 plus four,

which is 21, you said was 28 students? Yeah. So then it's 17 plus four, which is 21. You said it was 28 students. Yeah. So then it's 21 minus 28, or 28 minus 21, seven. That's correct. A, I didn't even have to give you the choices. That was seven. It was multiple choice. Yeah, how?

Nailed it. All right, great. Nailed it. Sweet, next segment. I'm a genius. Next segment. I and second. And second.

Let's think so. Okay. Okay. Wow, where is the fact? I'm a genius, next segment, and second. And then, thanks. So, okay. Okay. Wow, where is the value of the expression 2000 minus 165? Do you want the answer choices? What is the value of two? All right, so I'm writing it down. What, minus 165? Yep. What is the value of two? All right, so I'm going to write it down. What minus 165?

Yep. What is the value? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, give me the choices. 1735. 1835. 1935. Or 2835. 25 So 2000 minus 165 and what is the value? Yeah, basically what's 2000 minus 165? That's it. It seems like there's a trick question That's it 2000 minus 165 and my love to use a calculator You're gonna use a calculator on this test, right? Can you use a calculator? I already kind of used a calculator. Use the calculator. You're not. You use a calculator on this test, right? You can't use a calculator. I already kind of used a calculator. Use a calculator, yeah, you did. Yeah, I thought, I mean, you would,

you would be able to use a calculator. And I threw you out of the exam. And as a proctor, I have to, I have to disqualify you, not a proctor. It's a dream. I would have, I would have had the TI-83 on my desk and you could have told me earlier. Am I really not allowed to use a device?

You're not allowed to use a calculator? Not a 12 year old. You didn't have a pop calculator? You're stalling. I'm not stalling. Well, I know the answer is 1835. I already did the, I already minus that because I thought it was going to come into play for the value later on down the line. I was trying to get the number to start from. I didn't realize that was the whole last question. Let's get a little sexy now. This is, and I'll let you use a fucking calculator. That's how sexy these problems are. They're like, use a calculator and I still don't know if you use a fucking calculator. That's how sexy these problems are. They're like, use a calculator, and I still don't know if you could figure it out.

Great. Ready? Yeah. Which of these four fractions is between one half and nine tenths? Okay. Got it? Yeah. A, one quarter.

B, one quarter. B, one third. C, two fifths. Or D, four fifths. It's a D, four fifths. That's correct. Four fifths is in between. Yes. And segment. You're keep getting, you're keep answer correctly. So I'm going to keep getting, you're keep answer correctly. So I'm gonna keep getting a little bit harder for you. Okay. Again, you can start using a calculator because these ones are a little bit for me to calculate on that.

Just a reasoning and less just arithmetic. Right. Use the number sequence to answer the question. And then it gives you a sequence, ready? Uh huh. Two, four. Two. Four. Great. Eight.

Amazing. Fourteen. Uh-huh. Twenty-two. Thirty-two. Blink. What's the next number in the sequence? Okay, wait.

I need a pen and paper. And time. No. No. Not as close to time. I think we have ADD. And you can't tie HD. Or that's an eight crime. The numbers are ready. No, no, no, not in close the time ADD. And you can't tie HD or that's a eight crime.

The numbers are two, four, eight, 14, 22, 32. Blank. Okay. What is the next number in the sequence? Okay. Do you want the choices or do you want to just know it? Hold on. Okay.

I don't, I don't need it. Yeah. 44. That's correct. We're adding two than four than six than Yeah, 44. That's correct. We're adding two than four than six than eight than 10 and now you're adding 12. That's right. No fucking issue and segment.

Nope. End of the segment. Wow, in the head. We're ending it. And and we're getting a little harder. We got two questions left. So you made it this far. You only have two harder questions left.

Is this giving you like cold sweat flashbacks or like this is an exciting, let's see how fucking good I am now. I was very nervous going in. Then after getting two, I felt pretty good. Now that I've gotten three, I'm back to being nervous because I want that perfect game. And that last one was pretty hard. There's two left and one of them is like pretty hard. And last one is maybe the hardest one. Okay. Okay. On the scale of Tonji's map that shows 1.2 inches represents 10 miles. He's writing down folks.

He is getting the zone. Tajji skips across the stage. First 10, then Terry, then finally, Tajji. So Tajji's map shows 1.2 inches represents 10 miles, okay? How many inches would it take to represent 25 miles? Eh? That's...no, that's easy. So it's 2.4 plus 0.6. 3.1. You're very close.

Really? I think you tripped over the easy part. It is 2.4 plus 0.6. That's just three. It's just three. That's correct. 3.0 inches. And segment.

Actually, no, now we have to keep going because I need to get this one right to redeem myself. Perfect score. This is to get into one right to redeem myself. Perfect score. This is to get into Algebra 1 honors. It is sixth grade somewhere in Connecticut. I don't think you'll get this right, but if you prove me right, that'll be awesome. Or prove me right, let's find out.

Miss Hammond put the names of all of her students in a hat. Oh, and I should say, guys, if you're listening, feel free to play along at home. Of course. Mrs. Hammond put the names of all of her students in a hat. Okay. In a hat. Yes.

In a hat. In a hat. In a hat. In a hat. In a hat. Yes. In a hat. In a hat.

Yes. In a hat. In a hat. In a hat. In a hat. Don't be any that's correct This is ham and puts the names of all her students in a hat Got it. Yeah the probability that you'll pull out a boys name at random is three out of seven Okay There are 12 girls in the class. Okay. How many boys are in Miss Hammond's class? I don't even want to like, I don't even wanna try.

I wanna just say, I ran out of time. And I got all the ones I answered right. Yeah, this will be a classic, I'm just gonna guess. Give me the choices. Okay, again, the probability that she pulls out a voice name is three out of seven. Right. There are 12 girls in the class. Again, the probability that she pulls out a boy's name is three out of seven, right? There are 12 girls in the class.

How many boys are there in Mrs. Hammond's class? Three, four, nine, or 11. Nine. What do you say nine? I don't know. Yes, it's a random guess. The first two seemed like there was two few and then 11 just seemed like it was too close to 12. Nine feels good.

And I'm just gonna guess nine. Nine is correct! Yes, dude. I didn't learn shit. This is how I got by in school. Just fucking dumb luck. Nine out of 21 is three out of seven. Is how you do the math on that.

So for nine boys, 12 girls, that's 21. Whatever. Doesn't matter if I pass your teach you. Go to privacy and make it. That's a free ride to college, isn't it? Yeah. Keep gonna teach you you're gonna drive a safe man right? That's a free ride to college. Yeah, yeah, keep it on. You're gonna have to know this is a movie connection there. I want to make sure that anything all is networking get that into a scene where you got into a full time. Think of the ratio. I read a Saturn. I'll never have to do math in my life. I can delegate that to 21. I can fail up to 21.

Until I'm making these three times three, and then seven times three. Putting a lot of things into a retirement. And to crypto and to robobomvesting. I am selling my portfolio and I am hiring. I can reduce it to a percentage. Like a 43% chance. Yeah.

Yeah. Take that, Miss fucking, what's your name? Blue and Felt. Ha-un. First Harry, then Henry, then Shmooll. Nobody puts me in a hat. Good job. Thanks.

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This is a segment I coined as eBay Game Boy. eBay Game Boy. E Game Boy. That's right. Oh, thank you. Thank you. Oh. Oh.

Game Boy, of course, an homage to our old friend who used to search our Gmail for a word that only yielded one result. Not so rare that nobody would email and not so common that we'd have thousands, but we're looking to search eBay for something that has one result. One result.

If we can't get to one, I would say the lowest number wins the game Okay, and I thought it stakes for the game Mm-hmm enough of this Venmoing each other 40 80 110 dollars who's paying attention anymore? We're going broke. Yes. It's not fun. It's not fair. It's not good. I thought of a A consequence that would embarrass us on live slash the show. Amazing, I love it. And that is loser of the game. You have to make the noise.

Oh, has to sing a song, has to sing a full song. You can look at the lyrics and it can be any song. You can't sing along though. You have to pull up the lyrics and sing in your entire song. Go Acapella. Yeah, three minutes. And it can't be like happy birthday. No, it's gotta be like fucking Mr. Jones by the counting rows. And you have to give it your all. And you have to give it your all. And it does have to last an uncomfortably long part of time. So much so that people feel bad for you while they're listening.

It has to be so uncomfortable people will skip over it because they don't want to hear you do that for that long. Right. And we've never heard each other sing full songs before. Of course, because it's like, you know, we sing a few lines and we laugh, but like to do it in the entire song all the way through. It's shameful. Maybe I'll do Aladdin.

What, who do you think is a guy in my range? Oh, yeah. Yeah, head of the long man. I'll say it for a non-frient joke. I'm so sorry. We're gonna try. N-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-n-A-Boo. I'm gonna do that. I'm gonna do that. I love Disney. Okay. Well, just testing out this game, I actually got one perfectly in one, but we can't use it because I've already searched it.

And that was Wet Candle. There's one example of, quote, wet candle on eBay, only one listing. All right. Cool. So that just puts you in the right mind frame of it. Yeah, so it's it's two words Not necessarily just one one word because yeah, cuz if you search card or vase or camera There's gonna be thousands you can search like little blue camera or something try to like specify to the point where there's only one listing And I'm sharing my screen so you guys can play along with us

um and Let's also say if it's something I want, you have to buy it for me. Okay. Ornate Crow. Okay. Hashnate quotation. Ornate Crow.

Crow. Crow. Did you instantly get one and I started going to song? SRIP IN SIDE, YAY, OF YELL MY. Oh my. Ornate Crow, I'm searching. Two. Wow. Wow. Wow. Oh my. Or Nate Crowe, I'm searching. Two. Wow.

Oh God. Wow. Oh God. All right. Yeah. That's gonna be hard. Okay. Thank God for this fucking necklace.

So right now I see an ornate skull crow tea light candle, which is scary but fine. And then our Nate Crow is a gothic necklace. That's actually kind of tight. I want that. Okay. Oh, shit. It was really over for something in the 20s.

Let's keep going back and forth a few more times because I can't end this quickly. Okay. Yeah. All sorts of things. It feels like each of us, we should get like three, three tries each maybe. Yeah. So if you can beat two, okay. All sorts of wax, Homer.

Hmm. Like maybe there's a wax, Homer Simpson out there. Yeah, there's gotta be a bunch of them though. Zero. No. Okay. No. I'll just go, I'm going to go for one. Yeah, we're about the year. Going for one.

Clear. Beetle. Clear beetle. No, you have to spell beetle like a beetle. Not like a beetles. Okay, like that. Yeah. Two again.

And one of them is a fucking necklace. You're obsessed. Wow. There's a lot. But there's a lot of that. Yeah, but that's not. All right. So the other ones are actually have a little clear.

And one is sponsored, which feels. It feels like I got one, honestly, with the two results. Yeah. Yeah. But I mean, one sponsored, I don't know. I don't know about that. Okay.

All search. Stinky? No, that's, no one's gonna sell a stinky thing. I'm not sure. I was just starting to think of a song. I would use this time to think of what song you want to sing. For me. I'm actually sad I can't sing a lot.

Gray? Everything is gray this summer. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Ha ha ha ha. Uh, Matt Poole, MATTE pool. Okay. I don't know what this could possibly be.

But I'm hoping for one. Here's one of the truth. 20 results. A lot of Matt Poole sticks. Yeah, Matt Poole toys. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay. Here's one.

Frog pill. Frog pill. Frog pill. Yep. 11. There's a lot of frog pill boxes. That's kind of cool. I like that. These are actually kind of neat. Now that I think about it. Yeah, these are nice. There's a lot of frog pill boxes. That's kind of cool. I like it. These are actually kind of neat

Now that I think about it. Yeah, these are nice. There's a lot of there's 11 frog pill boxes It just shows you how much stuff in the world. There's a lot stuff. Yeah, these are just the ones being sold Yeah, there's a lot that are being hoarded. Yeah, and preserved Go last chance Go last chance Um, golden chance, right? Gold last chance. Golden. Uh, golden. Little cream.

Little cream. Uh, window. Can I have cream window? I'm nervous about this. Why? What can this possibly be? I feel like three words is a little cream window. I think three words should be illegal,

but I'll reserve that stance until you win or lose. That's fine. I got some zeros with two. Okay. Little cream window. Honestly, I might just do cream window. No, little cream window. Cream window might be better.

Yeah, cream window is like, who would say little cream window? Yeah, I'll just do cream window. Yeah. Jesus. You should have said little 111. What if a 111? 111.

Let's see what a little cremundo. Oh my God, if it was one I would cry. I would literally cry. I would end this episode of just fucking start shedding tears. What is the song going to be? I guess little cremundo by the doors? Yeah, that's all it.

It sucks. Any song you like? I did it in the fucking rehearsal wet candle. One. Absolutely wet candle. Cougar candle company. Thick uncle, zero. Zero.

How about Thin Uncle? How 150,000? What? One. One. Wow. Thin Uncle. It's that a vintage vote, Thin Uncle, Sam pin back,

pizza crust advertising. This is actually kind of cool, vote thin. Interesting. A thing that would have been perfect. Yeah, they actually came up with it. No, you didn't. You came up with thick uncle. Well, of course I came up with it.

Okay, what song do I know all the words of? Yeah, you can look at the famous song that we all know or like an obscure song. I guess it should be more of an enjoyable karaoke song. Right. Do you ever request? I wouldn't mind hearing that Aladdin song. Oh, one jump ahead.

Yeah. Let's see. One jump ahead, lyrics. Okay. This one's pretty good, because I can be a little silly with it. Yeah. But you have to try to sing it.

It's weird. This is just a podcast, but I'm a little bit nervous. Okay. And there's different voices too. There's characters. Right. You want me to, I can do the chorus kind of.

This feels unfair because I thought of the game and the consequence, so it felt like rightfully that you would do it. Yeah. Mm-hmm. Well, I mean, you don't have to do this song if you don't want, because I can, I'll do this one when I lose another time.

You know, you can do a wiser song. Okay, I'm not gonna sing it, I'm not gonna help you sing it all. I've decided. So this will be all you. Okay, I'm not gonna sing it. I'm not gonna help you sing it all. I've decided. So this will be all you. Okay, I'll do this one just because it's probably more enjoyable than a Weezer song. Great.

Let's hear it. If you're driving everyone pull over, let's give him your the attention that he deserves. He's doing chores around the highway. Let's settle down for a second, give him your beat to sing, let's give a mirror the floor. And this is a mirror blooming felt singing one jump ahead. By Meena Masoud.

Okay. So vulnerable. All right, ready? Gotta keep one jump ahead of the bread line, So vulnerable. All right, ready? Mm-hmm. Gotta keep one jump ahead of the bread line, one swing ahead of the sword. I steal only what I can't afford. That's everything. One jump ahead of the law, man.

That's it. And that's no joke. These guys don't appreciate I'm broke. Riff, raff, street, raff, scum, trail try a little harder take that try a different tack guys Rip him open round the back line so I could take a hit gotta face the facts could use a really friend or two, huh? Oh Oh, it's sad Aladdin said the bottom. He's become a one man rise and crime. I'd blame parents, except he hasn't got him. Gotta eat to live, gotta steal to eat. Tell you what we're about it when I got the time. What job? Head of the slope, folks. One skip ahead of my doom next guys gonna use a nut next time gonna use a nom

Deplume Wow these lyrics are weird one jump ahead of the hit man one hit head of the flock I'll think I'll take a stroll around the block Stop thief Vandal a boo scandal, let's not be too hasty. Still I think he's right. Hurt hasty. Someone's gonna eat him. Got to eat, live, gotta still to eat. Otherwise we'd get along.

Wrong. One more time, here with the chorus. One jump ahead of the hoof beats. One hop ahead of the hump. One trick ahead of the saster. They're their quick but I'm much faster here goes better throw my hand in which we happy land in all I got to do is jump that was great man that was really good let me do can you feel the love tonight yeah I looking for like, that's good. Son of man by Phil Collins in the Tarzan soundtrack.

And then at the end of the podcast, well, we can put together a Disney compilation of all the songs we sang. That's right. It should have to be a Disney song every single time, because they are funnier than you remember. Gunny is a nom de plume. How many eight-year-old boys knew what the fuck that meant? Yeah. I mean, I did not remember any of these lyrics. I very, very, very rarely remember them now. This lady's gonna eat them.

Still, I think he's rather tasty. Or is that like, a sex joke? She's trying to smooch him. Yeah, yeah. She thinks he's hot. She's gonna eat him. Still, I think he's rather tasty. Or is that like, piss him? She's trying to smooch him. Yeah, yeah, yeah. She thinks he's hot. She's gonna eat his ass or something. Yeah. I really think that's what it was about.

I don't know if it was about tossing salad or running, but it could have been. Because when the genie comes, that was like his first wish, wasn't it? Like, he wants to make sure that nobody eats his ass or something like that. Why would he wanna make sure sure no one ever did it? Because like the lady that does it, it's like he wasn't interested in her at all right, right? Right. Antically, maybe not her, but somebody else that we had like a Jasmine type. Yeah, exactly.

Or a Raja type or a Nala tight. Yeah. We should write a Disney movie. Okay. All right. That was it. That was three solid sex. Yeah. I like the eBay game. eBay with a song. I don't know what the name of that segment could be, but I think it's a great recurring one. I also do think we should be buying.

I mean, that pin is $5. If there's only one thing of its kind, vote then. Like, it's literally the only thing that comes up when you search thin uncle. I feel like we should have it. We should put it in some kind of like museum. It's a thin uncle Sam pin. Yeah. All right. Maybe I'll buy this one as well. I love that. For more only friendly. You're only friendly, boo. For more of us, we're on Patreon. Patreon.com slash J.A. watching, and yes, even now writing some J.A. in a mirrors.

This is true. This is true. We wrote a scroll video and we wrote a long story video last week, right? Yeah, a story about a Christmas party, I think. Amazing. So check that out at patreon.com slash J.A. A story about a Christmas party, I think. Amazing. So check that out at patreon.com slash J.A. Thank you for watching.

If you're watching on YouTube, thanks for listening. If that's how you still consume podcasts because you're in the lender like us. Yeah. And we'll be back of course next week. Ciao for now. Later. You're my only friend, da boo.

Ah! That was a hit-dum-a-riginal.