Jordan, Jesse, GO! - Ep. 248: Deep V with Andy Secunda and Brea Grant

Episode Date: October 29, 2012

Andy Secunda and Brea Grant join Jordan for a discussion of staying "on brand", destination weddings, different types of fans, and their new webseries, Game Shop. ...

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 Give a little time for the child within you, don't be afraid to be young and free. Unto the locks and throw away the keys, and take off your shoes and socks and run you. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. And I'm Jordan Morris, boy detective. And this is... Jordan. Jesse. Go!
Starting point is 00:00:17 Icicles, tricycles, ice cream, candy, lollipops, popsicles, licorice sticks, Solomon, friendly, maggoty, edgy, priddle, dumb and priddle, deep, go this week. Jesse Thorne is out, but never fear. I've got Andy Secunda and Bria Grant on hand to talk about destination weddings, crazy horror fans, and deep Vs. Let's go. It's Jordan, Jesse, go. I'm Jordan Morris, boy detective. Jesse Thorne out in New York City taping some live episodes of the Judge John Hodgman podcast that I think you'll be able to hear soon.
Starting point is 00:00:53 But not to worry. In his absence, I have two terrific guests, coworkers, cohorts of mine, two of my absolute favorite people recently. First, we have a comedy writer, sketch performer, Andy Secunda. Andy, welcome to the program. Hello. Good to be here, Jordan. Thank you. Yes. Alongside him, we've got a comic book author and an actress who you've seen on television
Starting point is 00:01:21 programs like Heroes and Dexter, Ms. Bria Grant. Hey. Great. Hey, great. Well, yeah. Woo. We should be cheering for each other, right? Yeah. I got nothing on my head. What we do, we will add in post.
Starting point is 00:01:33 This is a very post-heavy show. Oh, great. We're going to add like whooping from an old episode of Married with Children. So when I introduce you guys, we'll add the same whooping that happened when Al flushed the toilet. Oh, that's great. So people will just fuck. Yeah, it'll sound like. Can I be like a save by the bell?
Starting point is 00:01:52 Like they kiss and everybody goes, ooh. Yes, yes. Can we have those come in a couple times? And when I say something funny, I'm going to pause and kind of, you know, just in the next sentence for the laughs. Oh, good idea. Good idea. Yeah. Well, I mean, when I went downstairs and, you know, they always on a live sitcom. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:02:11 And then mug a little bit. And mug. I mean, this is an audio show, so I don't think we'll be able to physically see the mugging, but it'll come through. I think so. I think so. So, Bria, actually, if you I'll allow for you being a little fatigued during this taping. I saw maybe some chatter on Twitter that this is not your first podcast of the week. Oh, no.
Starting point is 00:02:33 No, I did another podcast earlier this week. You are – I mean you are just such a new media go-getter. I try to make the rounds, you know, go to all the – I don't know anything about podcasts, frankly. I don't know anything. I just happen to know people who do a few. Yeah, well, they're the new webinars, I would say. You know how popular webinars are? Sure.
Starting point is 00:02:52 I've seen them on TV. Right. Commercials for them, not actual webinars. No, you watch those on the web. Oh, sure. That sounds like how it works, yes. Bria, I would think that— Sorry.
Starting point is 00:03:02 People think I'm very—I know a a lot about technology and I actually don't I know nothing you don't you shouldn't advertise that I've been talking to you about your branding Bria and you really gotta I know
Starting point is 00:03:11 you really gotta focus it up I'm a very my branding is honesty Andy it's honesty that will get you nowhere yeah come on
Starting point is 00:03:18 nobody nobody ever sold a Sprite with honesty Bria I doubt that here's what I I mean here's just what I see for you moving forward, and this is an audio
Starting point is 00:03:27 program, so you can paint whatever mind picture you want to. You talk about your Native American roots. Right. We can talk about how you're constantly splitting your attention between us and your PlayStation
Starting point is 00:03:43 Vita that you love so dearly. Which you have on your lap right now. Absolutely. It's right here. I'm petting it. What do you do with it? I don't know. Yeah, you pet it.
Starting point is 00:03:53 Pet it, right? It's like a cat. Again, you're hurting the brand. I'm sorry. I thought it was a cat. Speaking of audio versus visual, so you were telling me at this first podcast you did this week you had to change mid-show or you were asked to change mid-show. I did. I showed up wearing – frankly, it's the same sweater I'm wearing today.
Starting point is 00:04:14 Well, I didn't show up. I Skyped in. I Skyped in. Oh, okay. What is this program, first of all? Okay, let me just back up. Okay. It's my boyfriend's show.
Starting point is 00:04:22 His name is Kevin. Kevin. Our audience will know him show. His name is Kevin. Kevin. Our audience will know him as Kevin Sprinkles Pereira. I don't know what that means. Former guest on the show. He brought donuts. That's so nice. That sounds like him.
Starting point is 00:04:34 Yeah. Is that how you get a nickname? I should have brought something. Oh, you'll get nicknames later. That comes. That'll come, yes. Okay. But if you want to be in charge of your own nickname, you bring something, which he clearly did.
Starting point is 00:04:45 I mean, again, branding. This is very important. That's what people know him for is donuts. Right. And so he, for the whole show, was Kevin Sprinkles Pereira. Gotcha. So he's hosting a podcast now. He is.
Starting point is 00:04:55 It was actually only his second one. Okay. But it's called Pointless! Exclamation point. I think he may be changing the name. I'm not sure. Exclamation point in the title of your podcast.
Starting point is 00:05:08 Well, I think it, when I've seen, I feel, you know what, I may have just made that up. Is that a no? No, we've got one. I may have also just made that up.
Starting point is 00:05:14 I may just, maybe it's the way I say it. I'm like, it's called Pointless and that's just, I just, I'm so out of it. No, I mean,
Starting point is 00:05:19 I can testify firsthand. If you have a podcast with an exclamation point, I mean, pussy avalanche. Really? Versus – I mean, I've had both. That sounds actually dangerous. That does sound gross.
Starting point is 00:05:32 Does that creeps – well, I don't know if it sounds gross for me. I don't know. One time this guy told me that he'd really like a truckload of tits and I could not stop thinking. It was like this guy in this weird gas station. I don't want to tell the rest of the story. But it was the grossest visual that I'd ever – because I kept picturing a truckload of tits. And I was like, that is so gross. That had been severed from the woman.
Starting point is 00:05:53 They don't even have to be bloody. Just them on their own. Yeah. Yeah. Not attached to any women. Just a tit without an abdomen. Gross. It's just a red state.
Starting point is 00:05:59 Same thing with an avalanche of pussy. And you thought this is the worst date I've ever been. It was not a date. It was not a date. It was not a date. The first red flag, we're going to the gas station. Second red flag. I have a special place, Priya, that's just mine. I want you to check it out with me.
Starting point is 00:06:16 My truckload. Right. Great self-service. Soda fountain. Make yourself a suicide if you want to. So you're Skyping in. This is a video podcast. What was Kevin's complaint?
Starting point is 00:06:31 Oh, yeah. About your beautiful mustard yellow sweater. Right. Thank you. Yeah. Well, I was Skyping in just for like I was his guest. I talked about our show that we're going to maybe talk about. Sure.
Starting point is 00:06:42 We will. It's called Game Shop. Good work. And then I also talked about a comic book but I was Skyping him not as like his girlfriend but as like a guest
Starting point is 00:06:49 but also I'm his girlfriend so he lets me do that which is really nice. That would be funny if there was a weekly feature where you Skyped in not as Bria Grant actress, comic book author
Starting point is 00:06:59 but as Kevin's girlfriend and just like nagged him about stuff. I just like bitched about stuff. I'm like, do you remember when you left your underwear on the floor? And I'm just really pissed.
Starting point is 00:07:07 We've got dinner at my mom's this week. Yeah, don't forget. Cut. Just as a recommendation, again, against branding in my opinion. I don't think you should even mention a boyfriend. I know. I think you should just talk right from the top about how hard it is. I'm out there.
Starting point is 00:07:20 I just can't click with anybody. I can't. No men understand me. It's probably this Xbox something in my lap. Yeah, right. Probably come up with a specific after Xbox if you can. Sure, sure. It's probably – I just spend so much time gaming.
Starting point is 00:07:31 I can't meet any men. Plus I'm so awkward because my boobs are so big. I know. It's such a bummer. Especially on radio. You can just elaborate as much as you want. Sure. It's true.
Starting point is 00:07:43 It's true. No, I mean I'm sure there – I feel like i just made fun of a whole group of women out there and that's i'm sure it is whatever they game and that's wonderful for them i don't want to have down gaming sorry no i feel like that was me backing up on my brand like no it's fine if you guys came sure uh so so you're you're skyping in as as guest not as girlfriend. Correct. And I was wearing a sweater. And he was like. A beautiful mustard yellow. And he said, Bria, you, he was like, is that what you're going to wear on the show? And I was like, yeah.
Starting point is 00:08:12 And he was, and this is live, by the way. It's just going. And he was like, I think you need to change into a deep V. And then the guy, other guys in the place, they were like, yeah, you really need to change. And I was like, what? I was like, I'm your girlfriend. And he was like, this is the internet, Bria, and you need to understand that you need to change into a deep V. Can we get a deep V?
Starting point is 00:08:27 Because otherwise there's men watching. So his hits are more important than his girlfriend's virtue. I'm questioning the priorities of Kevin Sprinkles Pereira. I mean, aren't you one of my friends in Texas watching? She's like, I'm not his crowd, but I think that was very rude. That was pretty funny. No, no, absolutely not. I was like, I'm not his crowd but I think that was very rude. That was pretty funny. And so I was like, I don't fucking change.
Starting point is 00:08:46 It was fine. So they wanted you to dress like you're dressed in at least three of the episodes of Game Shop that we'll have to see which ones those are. Right, right.
Starting point is 00:08:56 You have to watch all of them. Well, Bria, I think it was very polite of you while we were having that conversation to change into your slave Leia outfit. Right, so now to change into your slave Leia outfit. So now I'm wearing a slave Leia outfit while streaming.
Starting point is 00:09:08 Theater of the mind. Theater of the mind. We'll be back in just a minute on Jordan Jesse Go. La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la. Support for Jordan Jesse Go comes from Audible.com, a provider of digital audiobooks and more, with more than 100,000 downloadable titles across all types of literature, including fiction, nonfiction, and periodicals. Audible suggests that Jordan Jesse Go listeners might enjoy They Call Me Baba Booey by Gary Delabonte and Chad Millman, or My Mother Was Nuts, a memoir by Penny Marshall. Bonte and Chad Millman, or My Mother Was Nuts, a memoir by Penny Marshall. For a free audiobook of your choice and a free 30-day trial membership, go to audiblepodcast.com slash jjgo. That URL, once again, audiblepodcast.com slash jjgo. Also supporting the show this week, ask.metafilter.com, life's little questions answered.
Starting point is 00:10:05 the show this week, ask.metafilter.com. Life's little questions answered. If you have a question, no matter how trivial, go to ask.metafilter.com and a group of informed, intelligent people will answer it for you. No dummies here like you might find on other question answering sites. Ask.metafilter.com. Our sponsor, we love them. Also this week, Ting. ting what is ting you might ask ting is mobile that makes sense ting is a no bs mobile service there's no contracts no overage charges or penalties and if you are a jj go listener you can get a 50 discount for the purchase of your first device visit jordan jesse go.ting.com and you will get 50 off your first device that visit jordangessiego.ting.com, and you will get $50 off your first device. That's jordangessiego.ting.com. It's Jordan, Jesse, Go. I'm Jordan Morris, boy detective.
Starting point is 00:11:06 Bria Grant, mustard yellow. Terrific. It's great. Andrew Secunda, intergalactic space pirate. Oh, damn you. Yours is so much better than mine. Tough luck. Too great.
Starting point is 00:11:16 No, no, no. Those were both delightful. Of course, Bria, Andy, and I all co-star in the upcoming web series Game Shop on IGN's YouTube channel. We had a delightful time shooting that. Sure did. It's Clerks in a Video Game Store. That's right. And it was tons of fun.
Starting point is 00:11:36 That's a great little way to put it. I've been describing it poorly. How have you been describing it? I don't know. Where was I? I don't know. It's a web series. You describe it as that thing that happened while I was on Shrooms.
Starting point is 00:11:51 There's a lot of colors, a lot of shapes, sounds. You can feel the sounds. Very unprofessional of you to show up on Shrooms, by the way. Sorry. God, sorry, Andy. It's all right. It was interesting performances. Oh, good.
Starting point is 00:12:04 And the web series, Andy's directorial debut, if I'm not mistaken. Debut? Is that wrong? I directed the Children's Hospital webisodes. Oh, okay. That's cool. And I directed some other smaller things. But certainly—
Starting point is 00:12:17 Sure. You directed that second Riddick movie, right? Chronicles of Riddick? I had my name taken off that one. But yes. But yes, yes. I mean, there's just a lot of creative differences on that. I mean, Vin Diesel's, I mean, he...
Starting point is 00:12:30 He just has his own vision, so what are you going to do? Sure. I mean, he's the man. Yeah. Actually, that was very similar. That was Clerks on a space barge, was the way I originally saw it. Right. You thought it would have less punching and teleport fighting.
Starting point is 00:12:48 Less mythology. Right. And more just, you know, fun banter. Uh-huh. Fun banter. So finally I got my chance on Game Shop. Okay. So Game Shop you see as kind of your mulligan for the Chronicles of Riddick.
Starting point is 00:13:00 Exactly. Okay. Yes. Now the fact that you made me shave my head makes a lot of sense. Well, yeah. I mean, it ties in. It kind of does. I want to tell you guys about the weekend that I just had.
Starting point is 00:13:17 Before I do, I will kind of apologize to Jordan, Jesse, go regular listeners because this will be the like fifth wedding thing I've talked about on the show in the past couple of weeks. But I feel like my non-working life has been all weddings this month slash back end of the year. I'm having a similar thing. Right? Isn't October a weird wedding month? It's sweet.
Starting point is 00:13:40 I have a lot. I have a lot coming up. Like I have two coming up and It's a lot for me. My friends don't really get married that often. Right. Because you're only friends are your PlayStation Vita. Exactly. They never get married. And your steampunk armor.
Starting point is 00:13:58 Yeah. Andy is, I guess, the only married in the room now. That really sounds like a slur. He's The married. He's a married. Oh, boy. Look at the married over there.
Starting point is 00:14:09 Oh, boy. Are October weddings cheaper? Are they more romantic in some way? We got married in January for financial and for the beauty of the snow, guys. Right, right, right. Married in New York. But, yeah, so I don't know about October. Definitely, I guess it seems like July-ish, April-ish, May-ish.
Starting point is 00:14:30 That's probably the high season. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah, I feel like I've... Anyways, well, this wedding, this wedding that I went to was a destination wedding. It was in Cabo San Lucas.
Starting point is 00:14:41 Nice. It was my buddy Mike whose bachelor party I've mentioned planning and then going to on the show. And so, yeah, I had never been to a destination wedding before. I had been to Cabo for one day. I had worked there for one day a few years ago. So I kind of sort of understood what I was getting into, but I had never, like, hung out there.
Starting point is 00:15:03 You know, I had never tried to have any fun. I'm impressed that you went to a destination wedding because I've been invited, but I had never hung out there. I had never tried to have any fun. I'm impressed that you went to a destination wedding because I've been invited, but I never go. Oh, interesting. Where have you turned down destination weddings, too? They're all tropical like that. It's like, go to Costa Rica or some crap like that. I'm like, I'm not doing that.
Starting point is 00:15:18 What about that is not appealing to you? I just don't. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know why I never go. I just have never gone. Because you're going on a big trip, but it's on somebody else's timetable. Right.
Starting point is 00:15:29 No, yeah, yeah. It is sure. It is kind of like if you were on a budget, your year's vacation budget is just like, oh, you're spending it in Cabo now. And you're doing this. We love each other. Duh. I went.
Starting point is 00:15:40 That's my impression of married people. That's what married people seem like. That's what those marrieds are like. Right, those marrieds. Yeah, I'm doing of married people. That's what married people seem like. Those marrieds. I'm doing an offensive married voice. It's my offensive married character. You got your married face on. No, I love you.
Starting point is 00:15:53 Love kids. It's part of my SNL audition reel, too. Sure, great. It's great. I think I'm working on it. Which is the catchphrase? I mean, duh, I love you. Yeah, it's great. That's, I think, duh, I love you. Sure.
Starting point is 00:16:05 That's, I think, one I can see on T-shirts. Keep going back to it. You know, kind of workshopping some others, you know. Where have you been? Where have you been? We have a joint bank account. That's very specific. You know, I think these will be the new.
Starting point is 00:16:22 How many deductions am I supposed to take? That's a really. More tax humor. More tax humor. That's what this thing needed. I went to a destination wedding both in Rome in the last couple of years. Wow. That's a cool one though.
Starting point is 00:16:37 It was cool. It was really nice. But the best one I went to, which I met a guy on the street that I hadn't seen in years. And he invited me to his wedding a few weeks after that was in Poland. And that was the best destination wedding I've ever been to. Was he from Poland? He was marrying a Polish girl. Oh, interesting.
Starting point is 00:16:55 Were they married in a submarine with a screen door on it? Because I've heard a lot of – is that an old Polish joke? No idea. They have a submarine with a screen door on it because all the water would get in. Oh, the screen door. Sure, I understood. I immediately was trying to figure out the movie reference you were trying to connect it to. That's from Das Boot.
Starting point is 00:17:14 Polish submarine. I don't, and I screened out the screen door part. No, I was referencing a racist joke. Oh, gotcha. That's why my brain doesn't go there. Because I'm a good person. Oh, boycha. That's why my brain doesn't go there. Because I'm a good person. Oh, boy. But it was great.
Starting point is 00:17:27 Huh? Yeah. Yeah. What is Poland like? It was awesome. It's ancient and ancient is probably very insulting to them. But it's sort of – it has a lot of history and this was prior to my being married. The women are just breathtaking. They're
Starting point is 00:17:45 amazing. Really? Huh. In Poland? Yeah. And it's a sharp divide, at least this was a while ago, but it was a sharp divide between the people that were very excited that you were American and the people that were very angry that you were a rich, horrible American. Oh, great.
Starting point is 00:18:02 That makes anything more fun. Yes. Wondering if someone's going to punch you. Right. I makes anything more fun. Yeah, right. Yes. Wondering if someone's going to punch you. Right, right. I got in a couple of mere fights because we would hang out late at night. And people would just hear your American drawl. In fairness, we were drinking a lot and there were just a lot of social situations where you're talking to a girl and maybe you shouldn't be talking to that girl and then somebody comes up and there's trouble. Sure. Interesting. What was going on? Was there something politically going on at the time that people were mad about? My instinct was it was an
Starting point is 00:18:35 economical issue. It just sort of felt like most of the Americans that probably go there probably are horrible wealthy Americans. It turned out I was only mid-range, so I'm only a mid-range horrible person. Well, congratulations. Hopefully you got to tell them that before they punched you in the face. I did. I'm a mid-range. I'm a mid-range. I'm actually a fast runner, so I don't.
Starting point is 00:18:56 When the Polish punch is coming for your face and you scream, I'm mid-range, I'm mid-range, they think about it or they just drop it down to the body. They make it a body shot. But Jordan, please. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's hear about your wedding. So this was in Cabo San Lucas. And I think the most telling thing about Cabo San Lucas or a thing that I think is very descriptive of its whole vibe is when you get off the plane and you're going through customs.
Starting point is 00:19:25 Now, this is customs. This isn't the airport terminal. This isn't the place where you get a magazine and get some food. This is customs. This is a government area in an airport. They are playing videos of a wet T-shirt contest. Yes. That is their welcome to our land.
Starting point is 00:19:47 Sure. It's the equivalent of a slot machine in Vegas. Right. Yeah, yeah. But like with tits. Exactly. They play to their strong point. Kids are just in there and yeah, you were just – and while you're waiting in line, you just watch a video of a wet t-shirt contest.
Starting point is 00:20:04 That's amazing. Is it on loop? Yes, it is on loop. I saw the same wet t-shirt contest maybe two and a half times before I got through customs. See, now you can make fun of that, but they would have a very high-rated podcast. Right. Yes. Oh, true.
Starting point is 00:20:18 Sure. The Cabo San Lucas Airport Customs Podcast. Fascinating. Very. Lucas Airport Customs Podcast. Fascinating. Very. And it kind of – I mean I guess what Cabo is is it's a spring break destination.
Starting point is 00:20:35 And I had never spring breaked before. I mean there was a time when I was going to school and I didn't go to school for a week. But I never did the Daytona Beach, Cabo San Lucas Lucas we're too young to drink but let's drink anyway it's great and like that yeah let's crash a jet ski
Starting point is 00:20:49 oh yeah like that girl's doing shots and someone's I don't know did you guys did you guys do a traditional balls to the wall shot shot shot
Starting point is 00:20:58 spring break no no look at us yeah it wasn't that cool it wasn't very cool you just
Starting point is 00:21:04 there you go that's on brand I'm just kidding I really wasn't that cool. I wasn't very cool. You just – There you go, Brianna. That's on brand. I'm just kidding. I really wasn't. I really – You just took that time to work on your Sailor Moon costume. No. I think it was – I just like was like – just like had no friends.
Starting point is 00:21:15 Like I didn't even have like cool hobbies. She's on track. She's got it. There we go. There we go. Interesting. So yeah. Because you were so awkward then.
Starting point is 00:21:22 Yeah. My boobs were so big. No one knew how to then. Yeah. My boobs were so big. No one knew how to talk to me. Your boobs came in early. It was horrible. So yeah. So this is – so Cabo kind of knows what the drill is. It's no – and yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:39 And he gets kind of like Vegas. It's like we realize why you're here. You know. Wet t-shirt contest. To see tits. As many as possible. To see tits in public. So, yeah.
Starting point is 00:21:53 But we went to a resort. It was very, very beautiful. And along the lines of. What was it called? It was called Hacienda Encantada. Great. Which means the house of tits. I don't know Spanish.
Starting point is 00:22:10 Yeah, I think the house of being in love. The house of... Encantada? Maybe it does. Similar? Yeah, something like that. And so definitely something I noticed was that the employees, you know, everybody is very, very accommodating and you get this wristband when you come in, you know, kind of like a paper concert wristband,
Starting point is 00:22:31 which means you are all inclusive. So, you know, you just walk up to the bar, you just get a drink, you just order food and then you just leave. Sometimes without eating or drinking the thing. So, yeah, it's kind of just this kind of carte blanche that you get. You're not a big drinker, are you, Jordan? Yes. You are. Yeah, maybe
Starting point is 00:22:51 a little too, even to the point where I maybe think a little too much. Okay. I'm being conscious of my alcohol intake. I gotta say, Jordan, I think that's off-brand too. Oh yeah? No, no, no. I enjoy a glass of port during... Maybe I'm pegging you Oh, yeah? Being a big... No, no, no. I enjoy a glass of port, dear Aiden.
Starting point is 00:23:06 Yeah, that is really... Maybe I'm pegging you guys wrong. Maybe I'm putting you in a box. Yeah, quit trying to box us in. People can be different, Andy. You're right. You guys are three-dimensional human beings. We're who we are. Yes, I enjoy a little sherry around the Christmas tree.
Starting point is 00:23:20 Just trying to sell the action figures, guys. No, no, no. This is interesting. Let's divert here for a second. Andy, we only met when we were kind of teamed up by our management to do this web series and then Bria kind of came on later. That's interesting that you think that the Jordan Morris experience doesn't involve maybe a little too much drinking.
Starting point is 00:23:44 What would you expect? What would you expect? What would you expect? Well, I base it on your interactions socially and your focus as a – or your interest as a writer, which to me seem, you know, very – Oh, because writers certainly never drink. No, because you're much more polished than sloppy drunk, I would say. You're kind of like a polished and like have a very mannered way of speaking. Exactly. And I think that that doesn't go along with blackout drunk guy.
Starting point is 00:24:11 Absolutely. And you're, I would say, amongst all of us, you would be the person I would most characterize as the mediator. Because no matter what conflict was going on, well, yes, that's true. All right. You're the logical. Are you a Libra? I don't know anything about that. I don't either.
Starting point is 00:24:29 You went first. That's what I am and that's what I feel like. I have no idea. I just guessed. That's okay. Me either. I'm glad that you don't because that's weird. I tried.
Starting point is 00:24:39 It was great. The astrological thing? Yeah. No, no. I mean I feel like I am – I mean, I feel like I'm a big, like, social drinker. I feel – I get a little antsy when I'm in my house too long. Oh. And my default is always get someone to go to a bar with me.
Starting point is 00:24:54 Oh. Interesting. Yeah. But no, but you don't do the drinking at home by yourself. No. Well, that's good. Sometimes I'll make a little cocktail. Sure.
Starting point is 00:25:02 But, yeah, I'm a big, like, if I'm in my house for too long and nothing is happening, my default is always bar. Oh, yeah. And then, like, hot wings are usually also involved, which is not the healthiest habit. But that's not your – what is your persona? See, this is where I'm rude. Sure, then we'll – Because we only recently became familiar with each other. I don't know that much about the podcast or your persona on it.
Starting point is 00:25:28 Sure. Are you more of a frat boy on this podcast? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. I'm just talking about how much I love LMFAO. Sure. Fucking jet ski accidents that I've gotten into. Absolutely.
Starting point is 00:25:41 Popping collars. No, I mean, but I, you know, I, right, I mean, I guess I guess I would call myself a big social drinker. I don't know. And also a very kind of boisterous, ridiculous drunk, too. Huh. Yeah, like, you know.
Starting point is 00:25:57 I've really been missing out. Do you not drink very much, Andy? I've only seen work Jordan. Oh, yeah. I have increasingly partaken more as my stress level has increased over the years. But really I'm a latecomer to drinking. I'm a latecomer to pot because I always sort of felt like, no, I don't want to hinder my faculties. I need to hold on to the ones I have. But every once in a while I'll do the drink or, you know, when I started smoking pot only a couple of years ago.
Starting point is 00:26:28 Oh, interesting. Was part of it moving to California where it's easier to get? Because you were a New York guy for the longest time, right? Yeah, I only became a California. I refuse to say I'm a California guy. I only temporarily moved to California. I wish they all could be California guys. David Lee Roth version.
Starting point is 00:26:48 No, it was the last two years in New York. I think I was just at a friend's house. And, you know, I'd smoke pot, but I've always been like, nah, I just feel like I'm slow and I'm not sure that I'm not saying anything wrong. Even more than usual. I'm not sure that I'm not saying anything wrong, even more than usual. And then I was at a friend's house and I was relaxed and I was like, oh, that feeling is gone. Yeah, yeah. The feeling that's just sitting in the back of my shoulders constantly is gone.
Starting point is 00:27:17 And that's when I was like, oh, maybe this is nice. How long have you lived in L.A.? Really only like four months. I mean, I've been coming back and forth for, you know, over a decade. Yeah, that's funny that you say that. I guess I would have pegged you for – I mean because I feel like since I've been going to – I was going to say I've been going to the UCB theater since I've moved here and I feel like I've seen you more than a handful of times. Yeah, than I do ASCAD or whatever, drop in on shows. But yeah, I've been a New York resident and just resisting every step of the way coming out here.
Starting point is 00:27:49 It's tough for those New Yorkers. In terms of? To move, to make that LA move. I mean, it seems like something that most showbiz New Yorkers eventually just kind of have to buck up and do, but it's tough. Yeah, there's no,
Starting point is 00:28:00 I'm just fighting common sense after a while. But yeah, but I was born in Manhattan. So it's even more in my bones to just be like I shouldn't be here. There's something wrong with me being here. People in New York, they have like allergies to LA. It's an issue. I literally think that's true. Just so you know, in New York, it's like this.
Starting point is 00:28:19 And I started a club for a while, which I called LA is not New York. LA is not New York. Just so you know, it's not New York. It's not the same when people are like, but in New York, it's like this. I'm like, we're in fucking L.A. Right. We're in like the worst city on the planet. Of course, it's not like New York.
Starting point is 00:28:34 We literally live in like the grossest, nastiest place where people are the evilest. Where are you from? Texas. Yeah, because you have, I mean, even a similar vibe, I feel like comes. You're from or you spent most of your adult life right in Austin? In Austin, yeah. Okay, interesting. So there's even, I mean, there's even its own little prejudice there I feel like because it is such a like fucking let's hang out.
Starting point is 00:28:55 Hang out, drink cheap beer and make art. We like to make art in Austin too. Oh, sure, sure, sure. We're very arty. A lot of turquoise. Yeah, of course. A lot of feathers. Yeah, some like wolf howling at the moon or something.
Starting point is 00:29:04 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. So yeah, it's a very different world it's very people are like what's it like in in big city la like everybody when i moved here i was really scared someone was going to pull out a gun and shoot me on the highway because that was whatever that was what my idea of la was because only the movie la story right but no i mean just generally people like you know there's they get road rage and they shoot you and i'm'm like, that would happen in Texas way more likely. There's way more guns and trucks in Texas than there are in L.A. But it was what I was really concerned about when I moved here.
Starting point is 00:29:31 Oh, interesting. And kind of to circle back around a little bit, what was your drinking life like in Austin versus how it is in L.A.? Were you the cheap beer every night, fucking punk rock, but with a slide guitar? Sure. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. Yeah. Very cheap beer, drinking most nights kind of thing. And then I moved to LA and it was really expensive and that really shocked me because I moved
Starting point is 00:29:57 here and I think I had saved up like $900 or something and I was like, this will be great, right? This is fine. And Austin, there's like a ton of money. That's three months rent and I can get a whole new living room set. It was like I lived
Starting point is 00:30:09 in the weird, like it was a, well, they can't see us, but we're in a very tiny room. It was about as big as this and I shared it with another girl. This giant studio that we're in. This huge, huge, massive room.
Starting point is 00:30:20 And it was like in some dude's backyard. on expensive leather couches. Yeah. Exactly. It was, yeah. Andy, there's Shayise lounges. My apologies.
Starting point is 00:30:27 But I go through phases of drinking. I drink sometimes, but I am much more of a social drinker. But I'm very much like whiskey on the rocks or cheap beer. I still have those Texas roots. See, that fits brand. I can see that. Because then that adds to the punk rock aspect. Gotcha.
Starting point is 00:30:45 By the way, you have written a comic book. I can see that. Yeah. That's sort of because then that adds to the punk rock aspect. Gotcha. Gotcha. Of the. By the way, you have written a comic book. Yeah. So you can't be that off brand. No. I mean, I love comics. I do.
Starting point is 00:30:53 I'm a big. I just don't. I don't. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You just don't want to be pegged so that you can be sold and have a successful career. You know what?
Starting point is 00:31:00 I'm already pegged and already sold. It's fine. It's fine. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not, you know, knocking it. I just fine. It's fine. I'm not knocking it. I just don't like to lie and be like, my favorite video. I love playing Dishonored because I don't even know.
Starting point is 00:31:11 Good pull, though. Good job. I read Twitter, guys. I read Twitter. You got to get to it every weekend. Well, that is something that we definitely like. That is definitely a plot point in an episode of Game Shop is that like faking nerdery
Starting point is 00:31:29 because it is such a strong brand and it is something that goes on a lot I think. Interesting. So it's yeah but it's definitely because I could see you going to a place where you do have these certain kind of nerd tendencies but it is nice to see that you will own up to the fact
Starting point is 00:31:46 that there are certain crevasses of that world that you just don't know about. Yeah. Yeah. And that's not, I mean, you know, and more power to people who like it. I mean, I think it's, I mean, yeah, it's just not something I've ever been into. You did, to be fair, you did give me a lot of wedgies on set. I did. And I would talk about Borderlands.
Starting point is 00:32:01 Yeah. And like some, and I'd put your head in the toilet and flush it. What's that called? Swirly? Swirly? Swirly. Classic bully. And I wouldn't stop it, but I would say that's off-brand. You're acting like a so.
Starting point is 00:32:13 She need to act like a nerd. Oh, so yeah. So circling back around to Cabo. So yeah. So this – so hard drinking is kind of the order and definitely the guys I'm with. I was this guy. This guy, I was his only like work friend. We worked together at Fuel TV for years.
Starting point is 00:32:34 And it's a small wedding. It's a destination wedding. So everybody else there is one of his bros from San Diego. Oh, wow. Capital B bros. I mean, yes, these guys, yeah, just wanted to talk about Pennywise and the Misfits. Amazing. Wearing their tuxes with backwards baseball caps.
Starting point is 00:32:51 Right. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. All terrific, nice guys. But, yeah, but very much how you would imagine, you know, how you imagine San Diego bros to bro down. Anyways. Bro down a good title for something. Right.
Starting point is 00:33:04 Yes. Let's put a pin in that. Andy, I'm glad you're trying to turn this into business. I Down, a good title for something. Right, yes. Let's put a pin in that. Andy, I'm glad you're trying to turn this into business. I just feel like... I'm sorry, I already sold that
Starting point is 00:33:10 to Warner Brothers. God damn it! She texted so fast. Oh, TJ Miller's in it. I fucking know it. Oh, I fucking know it. Is he your nemesis? I mean,
Starting point is 00:33:20 I have a little bit of a friendly rivalry, and by friendly rivalry, I mean intense mind rivalry. So he doesn't know about it. He has no idea. Any other dude with curly hair, I kind of look at their success a little bit sideways. Like Stephen Wright. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:33:36 Whenever fucking Stephen Wright. I'm the same with blondes with short hair. When I see them, I'm like, who is that? What is she doing? Right. And I'm the same with white, middle-of-the-road human beings. So your life is a living hell because everyone, all people – oh, no. So my point about the staff of this place in Cabo, Hacienda Encantada, kind of along the lines of the ugly American thing we were talking about earlier is that like every time I would like have a question or a – just – I think my all-inclusive bracelet included a certain kind of whiskey but not Canada Club and I ordered a Canada Club and they had to tell me that my bracelet didn't get me that particular liquor. But there was another one.
Starting point is 00:34:26 Reasonable misunderstanding. But they would recoil. And their tone would be so apologetic as to make me uncomfortable. Like it was – The people who worked at the place. Right. The people who worked at the place. And I was like, oh, that's so weird that every time you know there's just a little misunderstanding the that apology comes so hard and fast and
Starting point is 00:34:52 intense like i'm like oh but the people who usually come to this resort are probably the fucking worst like there are probably so many ugly americans there with like a kindle actually ugly people. Oh, yes. People who are like hideously unattractive. Right. Yes. The ugly American stereotype and also unattractive.
Starting point is 00:35:12 Lots of boils. Yeah. They probably do get that kind of awful treatment that a resort staff would get. Anyway. So, yeah. That was an interesting thing that I had to deal with is like being apologized to too much that just made me really sad oh i'm sorry it's kind of a bummer well you know it's good the podcast has ups and downs right you want to have a fucking bummer right in the middle uh but the opposite of a bummer uh we went into town one night to Sammy Hagar's Cabo Wabo Cantina.
Starting point is 00:35:46 Oh, my goodness. Oh, Jesus. Speaking of Van Halen, I think I said David Lee Roth earlier. So Sammy Hagar, of course, the replacement singer of Van Halen, has a restaurant and a signature tequila brand out there. Sammy Hagar's Cabo Wabo Cantina. Just as a mind exercise, what do you guys think? When I say that,
Starting point is 00:36:10 what do you guys think goes on there? I can just picture bright green. Everything's green because of the Cabo Wabo. Yes. Orange, probably. And maybe it's a little psychedelic? Why? Yes. Right. Orange, probably. And maybe it's a little psychedelic. Why?
Starting point is 00:36:25 Yes. I'm guessing Van Halen plays in, at least in the soundscape in some way. Yes. Or maybe the Sammy Hagar solo stuff. Yes. Yes. Both yes and yes. Pictures.
Starting point is 00:36:37 I Can't Drive 55 probably came on five times in the hour that we were there. Themed drinks. Mm-hmm. Toward the song. The Wabo Rita. There you go. Oh, my God. The hour that we were there. Themed drinks. Mm-hmm. Toward the song. The Wobbo Rita. There you go. Gross. And a lawsuit from Jimmy Buffett's Mexican restaurant.
Starting point is 00:36:55 I know this is one of the most obnoxious things to hear a comedy guy talk about, but I wrote a sketch once that was a mediator trying to get Sammy Hagar and Jimmy Buffett to merge their restaurants, but they hated each other. Amazing. That's good. That also makes its way into my SNL packet. I am currently not a writer for SNL. Jordan, when Game Shop hits the, I was going to say airwaves, but it's not.
Starting point is 00:37:17 Computer waves. Just over some wires. The wire system. I guess my point about the Cabo Wabo Cantina, it is maybe the place that I've been to that is the most like I had imagined it. Like I walked into it and I'm like, this was in my brain on the way over. Like psychedelic parrots going crazy on the walls. Yes. Lots of Van Halen and just like 50-year-olds in Dockers and Crocs making asses of themselves. Yes. Lots of Van Halen and just like 50 year olds
Starting point is 00:37:45 in Dockers and Crocs making asses of themselves. Right. Like it was it was exactly like it
Starting point is 00:37:52 it existed in my brain. Very interesting. And yeah. Horrifying. And terrible cover band that kind of alternated between
Starting point is 00:37:59 a Van Halen song or a Sammy Hagar song and then just name your bad band. Name Nickelback you know Red Hot Period, Red Hot Chili Peppers. Yeah. It's interesting just the phenomena of the cover band, particularly in that scenario where it's like if you have any love of Van Halen, you're only going to be disappointed by the cover band. Yes.
Starting point is 00:38:24 So it's strange that that would be the choice. Yeah, but they're live. They're here. It's a band. This terrible version. But I'm looking at, yeah, they were all kind of, I can talk to these guys after. Yes. So that's kind of what that was like.
Starting point is 00:38:42 So that was a fun evening. The reception was lovely. Nice. On the beach. Great. Great. Did she wear like a bikini dress or was it like an actual dress? It was very classy.
Starting point is 00:38:53 It was a classy number. Yeah. Fantastic. Definitely. V-neck. Was it a V? Deep V. Deep V?
Starting point is 00:38:57 We got so many hits on that wedding. Fucking the sexy thumbnail on that wedding. You brought it back. Yeah. That's right. Unblocking the sexy thumbnail on that wedding. You brought it back. Yeah, that's right.
Starting point is 00:39:12 By the way, as a side note, they're asking for – the publicists are asking for Bar Pally. Is that how you say your name? Oh, sure. The faux nerd from the – Yeah, we had a very lovely actress come in for one of the episodes to play this character we were talking about is the babe who doesn't really know about nerd stuff. Just trying to capitalize on it. Right, right. And the publicists were asking what now? They were asking –
Starting point is 00:39:34 Which I don't know if that girl would ever have to capitalize on anything. Like I think she's fine. She's going to be fine. She's doing fine. Whatever she wants to do, I would let her do surgery on my heart if she was like, I'm this. I'm like, I'm glad you are because you look the way you look. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:39:47 She is a dish and just the most alluring accent. Where was it from? Israeli. Israeli. Yeah. Very interesting. That's a perfect one because you don't have any associations with it. Right.
Starting point is 00:40:06 Right. But they wanted a photo. They want a photo of us. They asked for photos. And I was like, oh, all right. Photos of us. Oh, not of us. Nope, nope, nope.
Starting point is 00:40:17 Colton happened to be standing behind her in a shot. And that was one of the ones. That's amazing. That's amazing. Yeah, so we will their audience they know their audience yeah no i was definitely afraid that whoever would play that part it would be an uncomfortable day because they would be kind of playing that up while we were on set i was totally afraid we would get someone who's like this is so me i love mario kart. I loved Spider-Man. They wouldn't get it.
Starting point is 00:40:47 I love Hugh Jackman in the X-Men movies. You know, just that shallow, like, I did no work for this. Right. Anyways, but she was great. And definitely not one of those and just an Israeli babe. Absolutely awesome. She was so hot, it made me hate Iran more. Iran. I pronounce that wrong.
Starting point is 00:41:03 You really blew it there, Julian. I did, sorry. Sorry, guys. People in mid-laugh are like, how did he pronounce that? My mom always said Iran. She's like, oh, they're over there in Iran and I feel like I cannot bring myself to pronounce it Iran.
Starting point is 00:41:20 I think Bush also pronounced it. Oh, yeah. Didn't he? My mom was married to George Bush. Oh, your mom was married. Or is George Bush. My mom is also pronounced it. Oh, yeah. Didn't he? My mom was married to George Bush. Oh, your mom was married. Or is George Bush. My mom is also George. Yes, my mom is George Bush. Absolutely.
Starting point is 00:41:30 George Bush is a woman. Weird. Oh, yeah. There's a lot about. And your mom. Yeah, and also my mom. So, yeah. Lovely wedding.
Starting point is 00:41:37 Classy dress. And since I mentioned, I was kind of like the odd man out a little bit. I was the only work friend in the wedding party and everybody else was just – So all the women wanted to make out with you. Yes, they didn't. And I was like, ooh, work friend. Get him over here. Well, so here's kind of the relationship I had to that was that, you know, so me and the groom had worked for years together on Fuel TV.
Starting point is 00:42:05 And it was kind of like I was the host and he was the camera guy. And later we were both kind of made producers together. Nice. But, you know, we always had that kind of host-camera guy relationship. So I think and— You're saying you were in the power spot. Yes, exactly. I acted like a dick.
Starting point is 00:42:22 And, you know, so I was clearly this kind of, you know, and they asked me to make a speech. So I think kind of what happened was to sell me to the family. What the bride did was to kind of get them excited about who I was. They were like, oh, that's Mike's friend from work. He's an actor. He's an actor. And then where are they from? They are's an actor. He's an actor. And then. Where are they from?
Starting point is 00:42:46 They are all. They're from. Let's see. I mean, mostly San Diego and kind of. I don't know. Points slightly north. I don't know where. Why would actor really be a positive selling point?
Starting point is 00:42:59 Well, I think for everywhere except Los Angeles, it's a positive. Oh, that sounds novel. It's novel. It's novel. Right. Exactly. Like he works at Staples like that. You know, like, oh, I want to ask him about reams of paper, you know. So it was just kind of like and I could tell was just like, here's what we'll get them to talk to him.
Starting point is 00:43:19 Anyway, so I the show that Mike and I worked on together ended at the beginning of the year, but he kept working for the network and I did not. As a camera guy, they still needed his skill set. And as goofy host, they did not need mine. So there's this thing is I have not been on that show. And it's been a pretty good year for me. The best. Post that. Game shop. that's right but and you know i i hosted a road trip show for uh for internet yeah yeah yeah at the beginning
Starting point is 00:43:54 of the year and you know i i had this other kind of sketch series that was just canceled but and so you know it's like i'm sure they're wonderful they yeah and you know, it's like I'm like, yeah, they're wonderful. Yeah. And, you know, the podcast is going great. So, you know, it's not like I've taken a hit after not having this job. It's like, oh, it's I've been kind of steadily working and things are still good. But try try explaining to a 50 year old aunt what a web series is. Sure. They all came up to me with this like, you know, they're like, so, Margot tells us you're an actor.
Starting point is 00:44:30 Where can we see you? And I'm sure they were expecting. Are you on King of Queens? Right. Are you on King of Queens reruns? That's right. Like, I'm on it five. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:44:40 I mean, I could see they were expecting CSI or a movie that was coming out and then I had to like just have this – First you had to explain the internet. Yes, I had to explain that thing that your cousin used to forward you. The Russians in America came up with this technological communication system. Right. So interesting. So I so yeah, so I definitely had to like have probably five solid conversations with older ladies where they started out really excited and then just started looking around while I tried to explain what a podcast was. That's amazing. And then they always the follow up question was and and this and I had I went to my mom's wedding last weekend and I kind of met some of my new extended family. And they all asked me, their question was, so you make money doing that?
Starting point is 00:45:31 I love that. You make money doing that? I love that. Awesome. That's an appropriate question. Right. So blunt. So blunt.
Starting point is 00:45:36 I know. That's really crazy. And then makes you go like, I don't know. Do I make money? I don't know. Should I be making more? I have a similar, people like to, because I directed this movie like a year ago. People are like, oh, so do you make money doing that?
Starting point is 00:45:47 I'm like, no, actually I make my money acting, which is harder. Yeah, yeah. I don't know if it's really harder. But that's my new sassy comeback. Good. Nice. Because I have a lot of – although if you ever do – I did – I'm just going to drop my resume if that's cool. Do it.
Starting point is 00:46:00 I did Dexter and then right afterwards I did NCIS LA. And I was on Dexter for like, you know, a few episodes. Sure. And it was getting a lot of – whatever. People were really excited. But when I went home, no one cared and everyone was like, I saw you on NCIS LA. Right. Definitely.
Starting point is 00:46:13 And I'm like, really? Who watches NCIS LA? And I'll tell you, everyone I know from my hometown. NCIS is just – it's one of if not the top show. I mean, I guess it is. It's just I don't watch it. And so it was such a weird like – everybody saw it. I played this goth girl. It's weird that we if not the top show. I mean, I guess it is. It's just I don't watch it. And so it was such a weird, like, everybody saw it. And I played this goth girl.
Starting point is 00:46:28 It's weird that we're. It was very, everybody remembered. We're the Hollywood people. We're the people making the media. And yet we don't watch any of the things that America is interested in watching. Yeah, we're totally out of the loop. I remember being a – I remember in LA going to Best Buy the day that the Arrested Development season one DVD set came out and not being able to find one. Oh, wow. Going from Best Buy to Best Buy in LA because everyone had bought these Arrested Development DVDs.
Starting point is 00:46:59 Oh, wow. Okay. Great. But further evidence that like the media consumption here is just nothing like it is beyond. Yeah. Anyway. But yeah, I mean I guess – right. I mean tons of people I know watch Dexter and have little parties and make little cupcakes. Totally. But –
Starting point is 00:47:16 Not the rest of America. The rest of America is very – yeah. Which is a common question. I think it's a really weird thing and it's one of the only like jobs where people can say like I was renting a car in Dallas like not too long ago and the guy was like
Starting point is 00:47:29 what do you do in Los Angeles and I was like oh I'm an actress and he was like well do you make money doing that and I'm like I don't know
Starting point is 00:47:35 you just rent me a car I didn't actually I was it was like 2 in the morning and I was a little grumpy about it and he's like would I have seen you
Starting point is 00:47:40 in anything and I was like do you recognize me then I guess you haven't seen me in anything I was like in pure bitch mode at the moment. Just say porn. A lot of porn.
Starting point is 00:47:48 Porn. That'll end that conversation. That'll end that conversation. That's a good idea. What is the thing that you're recognized from the most? Heroes, usually. Still heroes. Some Dexter stuff.
Starting point is 00:47:59 But people actually don't recognize me from Dexter as much. Do you think that that's just sort of fanaticism of fan base? I think so. I mean, and Heroes was such a phenomenon, though. I mean, the first season was crazy. People were so insane about the show, and then it started losing audience second season, and then by my season, which was the third,
Starting point is 00:48:18 it lost a lot. But people still... But those Heroes people are still the Heroes people. Yeah. I mean, it wasn't a big top ten hit, but fucking Heroes people are still the Heroes people. Like, I mean, it wasn't a big, you know, top ten hit, but like fucking Heroes people are serious about it, right? Yeah, yeah. And they were very serious. And yeah, and still like people constantly, like that's the main thing. People are like, oh, I loved you in Heroes.
Starting point is 00:48:34 People still say like that pretty often. Yeah. Well, that's good. Yeah. who mainly is a writer and a behind-the-scenes guy, when you have to meet, you know, your wife's cousins or a random guy, what do you say to make the conversation as comfortable as possible?
Starting point is 00:48:56 It's usually a toss-up because the credit that gets the most response is that I was a writer on Late Night with Conan when I was in New York. But that, of course, in and of itself is sort of a can of worms of then, you know, I then have to have probably a hundred identical conversations about Late Night with Conan. Yeah. Right.
Starting point is 00:49:15 What's Conan like? Yes. What's Conan? That's exactly. That's exactly the, you know. So sometimes I'll just say porn. I write porn. I feel like it is sort of a choice in most of those conversations of I can allow myself to seem less interesting or I can, you know, or I can tell them a thing that's going to lead to a conversation that I've already had a million times. Sure.
Starting point is 00:49:43 Because, guys, I got nothing else of interest to say. Two hours. You have not read any books. You have not seen any movies. Sure. Well, I can talk about movies. But I don't find that in most of those conversations, man, I think we're all snobs, right? We're snobs.
Starting point is 00:50:00 Yeah, I was just thinking how snobby I like all those things sound. But it is like the weird, well, one, I mean, because I don't want to get defensive as part of it. I mean, people are like, oh, I've never seen Heroes. Was that a big show? And I'm like, yeah, it was – I mean, I guess not if you haven't seen it. I mean, I guess my life is unimportant. They want you to defend. Yeah, and like this weird like where I start to feel really like, yeah, go home and snob.
Starting point is 00:50:20 Guys, let's never leave this sound booth. I know. We get each other. All those horrible regular people. I know. With their not watching Arrested Development. That's right. Oh, those.
Starting point is 00:50:32 And their reasonable questions about Conan O'Brien. How dare they be excited about something. How dare you not know what a podcast is, middle-aged woman. Be on the cutting edge. I would like her to bring up things that you would not know about like where she starts talking about like like her needlepoint and stuff and like you're like i don't get and she's like you don't get that and like she's really bitchy back to you i like that yeah but i think the thing that i the thing that i don't like about it not is
Starting point is 00:50:58 explaining what a podcast is which is fine i'm happy to do it but it is that like feeling like i'm disappointing them like that to me to me is the main bummer of that conversation is that they don't know what that is and just assume you're a bar those particular situations you can't get to without rocking the boat too much. Like, who don't you like in this family? Where's the conflict in this room? Oh, you could absolutely get to that point, I think. If you really worked at it, you'd be like, so what's his story? And like a good aunt will tell you the whole story, which would be great. Right. Yeah. So what's his story? And like a good aunt will tell you the whole story. Right. Which would be great. Right.
Starting point is 00:51:45 Yeah. Well, that's why I kind of actually like my wife's parents because they'll – They shit talk? They'll kind of – well, they don't shit talk, but they are interested in having the amusing conversation about the people in the vicinity. Sure. Who disappeared for a few weeks. Exactly. That's great.
Starting point is 00:52:02 Interesting. for a few weeks. Exactly. That's great. Interesting. So, Bria, you kind of have been in three kind of really interesting
Starting point is 00:52:09 different pools. Like, you've been in the Heroes pool, you've been in the Dexter pool, you've been in the world of comic book authorship. And porn. And porn, obviously.
Starting point is 00:52:19 Yeah, I mean, most of it was in a pool, right? Right, right. Aqua porn. God, that's probably a thing, isn't it? Yeah, I bet. Sure. Always wearing a deep V, which actually worked against you.
Starting point is 00:52:30 Yeah, in the porn. The porn name was never – You were the prude in that one. I couldn't not wear it. That would be horrible. In that, because you are in those three different sections, I guess, which one has the most crazies? Oh. Well, you're leaving one out.
Starting point is 00:52:46 You're leaving a big one out. Well, I mean, I guess Dexter falls into this, but there's like the horror world because I did. Oh, that's right. You were in the Halloween sequel. I was. I was. The Rob Zombie Halloween sequel.
Starting point is 00:52:53 And that has like- Not Season of the Witch. No, no, no. Not- You're not 50. Five more days till Halloween. That's the third one. That's not the- Season of the Witch is the third one.
Starting point is 00:53:03 Season of the Witch is the third one without Michael Myers. Right, right, right. That's unrelated to the Nick Cage. Oh, it is unrelated. To what? Nick Cage did a movie called, it had I think a zero percent on Rotten Tomatoes at one point which was amazing. Season of the Witch. Oh, I've seen that. It's on Netflix. Him and Ron Perlman hunt the devil. Right.
Starting point is 00:53:20 I don't know why people don't like that. Who knows? Brilliant on paper. Yes, there's a third Halloween that. Who knows? Brilliant on paper. Yes, there's a third Halloween movie. They just took out Michael Myers. It's some murderous little kids. Yeah. No, it's not kids.
Starting point is 00:53:34 There's a mask factory. Oh, that's right. A hypno mask. And the masks – and on Halloween at a certain time, all the kids wearing the masks turn into like little demons. Right. And so this guy is trying to stop it and he has a crazy mustache and like lots of chest hair. It's amazing. It's actually a really good horror movie. If you don't like – if you take out of – you take it out of the like the Halloween canon and you're like, this is not a Halloween movie.
Starting point is 00:53:55 Right. If it was just called Season of the Witch before. Yeah. Yeah. Oh, interesting. So yeah. So you're in four different places that have kind of enthusiastic fans. Right.
Starting point is 00:54:08 Who's the nuttiest? You know, I don't know. I don't get that many nutty fans. I'm, like, really lucky on those lines. I mean, horror fans are the most, like, loyal, which I really like. Like, they will just keep – they keep coming. They're, like, loyal and they keep coming they're like loyal and they keep coming back and and that's really fantastic like anytime i do something horror
Starting point is 00:54:29 related they're like they're like oh my god it's a horror thing which is great because that means like you know i know i always have that like built-in group of people who will come and watch whatever i do which is like so lovely i always notice when i go to a comic-con when um you know there's kind of that upstairs area of comic-Con with all the autograph signings. Oh, right. And those can kind of range from- How does your booth do? Huh?
Starting point is 00:54:49 How does your booth do? Oh, the Legends of Podcasting booth? Sure. Not a huge lineup. No? Not a huge lineup. There is, there are those, and it can range from like kind of cool to, oh, you know, no one is there to see the honky tonk band from the glory days of WWF. But the lines that always have just fucking, you know, that are out the door with crazy, crazy, happy to be there fans are like Ken Foray from Dawn of the Dead and Elvira and like, you know, people who were in a legendary movie or thing but, you know, maybe didn't do a ton after that.
Starting point is 00:55:29 Sure. Like, you know, the guy from Monkey Shines, you know, like are super beloved. I wonder why that is. I don't know. But they are like – I mean I would say like just regarding your question, like comic books – I don't know if if people don't take me that seriously as a comic book writer I mean they kind of I mean I've done this is my third series
Starting point is 00:55:47 but I mean I've seen like major fans come up to like bigger people and maybe they've been a little weirder towards other dudes or whatever
Starting point is 00:55:54 but for the most part the comic book fans are pretty tame pretty like really nice really you know whatever but and a little
Starting point is 00:56:01 maybe a little brainier you know right right really intelligent yeah yeah I mean sure because they read I mean. Yeah, yeah. I mean, sure, because they read. I mean, they read something. Reading is involved.
Starting point is 00:56:08 Yeah. But the horror fans, and I mean, I don't mean this as a slide off. They're like really loyal. They're really loyal. And they have no idea what it is. But it's like once you have that like in your blood. And I'm a little like this. So I kind of get it.
Starting point is 00:56:20 I love horror movies. And I love sci-fi movies. And like that kind of I do freak out a little bit when I see some horror people. Nice job, Brie. Oh, do you like that one? That's good branding. That's good.
Starting point is 00:56:31 No, that was true. That's true. But I, I don't know. I don't know what it is that makes that like the more like beloved thing
Starting point is 00:56:39 where they don't turn on you. That's what it is. That's what it is. Is that like, I mean, I love some Heroes fans and they're lovely but they will turn on you and like they will be like, That's what it is. Is that like, I mean, I love some Heroes fans and they're lovely, but they will turn on you. And they will be like,
Starting point is 00:56:48 I did not like this episode. And it's like, I offended them. And I'm like, I'm sorry. I don't write it. Yeah, there's a real love hate. Yeah, they'll be like, I never bought your, they'll be like, oh, I loved Heroes, but I never bought your relationship with Greg Grunberg. And I'm like, okay, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to like hurt your feelings. You know, but the horror fans,
Starting point is 00:57:04 they don't really turn on you that much. They're more like they're like, oh, that movie wasn't that good. But I thought you did a good job on it or whatever. They'll be like, I didn't really get it, but I loved it anyway. Like forgiving or something. You know, it's interesting. It's like there are those guys like like Robert England, who was Freddy. Like if you just watch a lot of horror movies and maybe like a lot of direct toto-DVD horror movies or kind of, you know,
Starting point is 00:57:26 not lesser but like lower-profile horror movies. Robert Englund is just in that shit. All the time. Tony Todd, who has a cameo in Game Shop. He totally does
Starting point is 00:57:35 and I was excited to meet him. Right. Candy Man. Like, those dudes... And people are excited immediately. Right. Just even seeing that he's in it.
Starting point is 00:57:41 But he also did Hatchet. Or did you do Hatchet 1 or Hatchet 2? He's in the second Hatchet. I know he's in the second one. It's been a while since I've seen the- The first one also, I think. Is he the villain in Hatchet?
Starting point is 00:57:50 He's like the doomsayer. He's that like, don't go into that swamp guy. Yeah. Gotcha. Try to make that not sound racist. Don't go into that swamp voice. I thought his voice- That was pretty good.
Starting point is 00:58:01 I tried to do it without- I saw the hesitancy though. So it was like halfway between the character and, you know, just backing off of it. So, yeah, it is. Do it full throttle. You should. Right. What about Mary Doomsayer?
Starting point is 00:58:15 Duh, don't go into that swamp or I'll divorce you. Great. What a character. Yeah. You should just do that for the aunts at the wedding. Just do that character. Yeah. I'm these guys who
Starting point is 00:58:26 just got married. This is my acting. Do you like it? So yeah it is interesting that like those guys like you know maybe they don't pop up in you know
Starting point is 00:58:36 sitcoms or anything but they're just always being in horror movies. They're not even in like Sinister or like the movies that are like in the movie
Starting point is 00:58:43 theater right now. They're like in the like straight to DVD or the horror festivals because the horror festivals are a pretty big thing too. Oh, that's right. The Fangoria stuff. Yeah, the Fangoria. I just went to Screamfest and like, you know, and they have like little indies alongside of bigger movies at Screamfest, which is kind of cool. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:58:57 But like, yeah, the people like they're just like, yeah, loyal, loyal. That's a good crowd. You guys should make horror movies. Have you thought about doing that? Seriously. Yeah. Maybe a horror podcast. Was your film a horror movie?
Starting point is 00:59:09 The movie I directed? Yeah. It has horror elements. Horror elements. That's the way I put it. Horror elements. Horror elements. It has one Hydra toward the end.
Starting point is 00:59:17 Just right in the middle. A Hydra kills everyone. I just scream at one point. That doesn't matter. It's just working in an office. It's not causing terror. Yeah, right, right. Oh, yeah. It's just chilling. It's just working in an office. It's not causing terror. Yeah, right, right. Oh, yeah.
Starting point is 00:59:26 It's just chilling. It's just an office hydra. Yeah. And it's married. And it's married. I have seven heads. Well, we'll be back in a love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, Morris Boy Detective. Bria Grant. What was mine again? You can come up with a new one. Yeah, you can come up with a new one.
Starting point is 01:00:05 I'm going to go Bria Grant, Deep V. I'm going to switch it every time. Love it. Oh, great. It's on you, Secunda. Do I have to come up with a new one? I mean, or you can go back to your other. Do you feel like it beats Deep V?
Starting point is 01:00:16 No, I feel like now I'm not prepared, so I'm going to stick with Andrew Secunda, Intergalactic Space Pirate. No, boy. I liked that one. I liked it. Both good nicknames. You guys are both doing very well in the nickname department. Sad Intergalactic Space Pirate.
Starting point is 01:00:32 There's not as much intergalactic booty as there used to be. Plundering stuff when you're weightless. I made the Kessel Run in 19. run in 19 parts. Bree and Andy appear with me in the very fine web series Game Shop, which is on youtube.com
Starting point is 01:00:54 slash start. And I think it's probably when this episode is up, the first episode of our show will probably be up too. So check it out. It already has 900,000 hits. Go check it out. Cool. It already has 900,000 hits. Totally. Go check it out.
Starting point is 01:01:06 It's crazy. Just go to the internet. The feature film. It'll be the first one offered. Yeah. Whatever you Google. Just type in internet. That's right. It's the first thing that comes up when you Google internet.
Starting point is 01:01:18 It's true. Is our show. We are leaving here to shoot the feature film. That's how successful the first webisode has been web episode honestly that's how delusional I've been is like I've liked it so much and the chemistry between all you guys is so much that I'm like immediately thinking I really think this could be a feature film we gotta figure
Starting point is 01:01:34 out are you plotting a web series yeah well I mean you want the web series you know I think this is kind of like what I see for a game shop is kind of like what they were planning with Dark Tower for a while is where you would like what they were planning with Dark Tower for a while. It's where you would have three feature films, but then they are bridged by a TV series. Oh, good idea.
Starting point is 01:01:51 So I think that like, you know, the webisodes can lead into a feature film, which can then lead into like. We just need a billion and a half to just make sure that they all get done. That's all. Very reasonable. At least the first one will get done for that much. Yeah, absolutely. It'll kind of be like the Lord of the Rings. Right.
Starting point is 01:02:07 I mean, monetarily, I would say. Yeah. Like those were expensive movies, but I mean, they paid off. Absolutely. Absolutely. That's the way that people have to – if there's anybody out there with a billion and a half dollars, check out GameShop. A sound investment if there ever was one. Sound investment if there ever was one.
Starting point is 01:02:25 So, yeah. So once in a while, and by once in a while, I mean practically every week, we like to dive into a bank of phone calls that we have received from listeners. And we're going to do that now. Lindsay, can we hear the first one? Hey, Jordan, Jesse, possible guest. I just got out of the dentist getting two fillings done in my front teeth on my way back to work. The car behind me is driving with a skeleton in the passenger seat wearing
Starting point is 01:02:51 a clown wig and like it's hands up like it's waving. Kind of freaked me out. Thanks. Bye. That may be the grim specter of death. Who wears a clown wig? But he's just trying to like, he's like people are always so bummed out to see me. Sure. Let me pop this up a little bit.
Starting point is 01:03:09 Oh, so you're saying maybe the car he was riding in was about to get into an accident. Maybe he was there to take the driver. That would be even more – I was thinking that it was a sign to her. But I think it's – Can we check and see if she's still alive? Yeah. Is there a way to call her back? Yeah, let's see. Is there a way to—
Starting point is 01:03:25 Maybe wait until the end so it doesn't bum us out. Right, right, right. But in any event, if it's— Like my abused resort employee story. If it's the first option, I like that better that death is in the backseat of someone's car about to claim someone and is waving to other people. Buckle up, guys! Hey! It's a major fuck you reference.
Starting point is 01:03:44 Check this out, guys. And he holds up a little sign that says, don't text and drive. Did she say she also got fillings? Yeah, she did also say she got fillings.
Starting point is 01:03:51 Maybe she was hallucinating because she was on some sort of fillings. Oh, could be. On the phone, hallucinating. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:03:59 So she got an immediate wreck after that. I guess a skeleton clown could be a result of some nitrous oxide residue. Maybe. I'm not sure. Perhaps.
Starting point is 01:04:08 Okay. Well, let's just assume that happened. Great. Very good. We'll hope that she's okay. Lizzie, can we have the next call? Hey, Jordan, Jesse Goh. This is Mark from Oregon.
Starting point is 01:04:17 I am right now at about 3 in the morning walking back from my girlfriend's apartment to my dorm room. And I'm calling to say that at 19 years old in my second year of college, I just had my first kiss. Oh, my God, I love it. Oh, honey. Still, though, he didn't say hello to the guests.
Starting point is 01:04:43 Yeah. No, that was great. No, he didn't say hello to the guests. Yeah. No, that was great. No, that's the sweetest thing. Interesting. Because, I mean, a genre of call that we get a lot is I just lost my virginity or I just gave my first blowjob or I just had my first sexual experience X, Y, Z. And that's kind of where I thought this was going. I thought, I mean, because we've heard these types of calls before. But I don't think we've ever had a first kiss.
Starting point is 01:05:13 And kind of what I was thinking is like, I'm walking back from my girlfriend's apartment. I'm like, if you fucked, why don't you just sleep over? Why are you walking back, you weirdo, at three in the morning? You immediately turned on him. Yeah, I did. Oh, I did. I will lash out at the listener. I hate them. But no, this guy,
Starting point is 01:05:27 he was walking back at three in the morning because they kissed, and he's like, he probably cannot He's probably so excited. You know when you're just walking, and you're like, I don't know where I'm going. Where am I? You know, you're just so excited. Oh, totally. He's probably going to wander into traffic and be hit by a car with a skeleton.
Starting point is 01:05:43 You know what's interesting is it's sort of an audio Rorschach test because I immediately, based on his energy, thought he's going to tell us that she just broke up with him. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And this is going to be really sad. But he was just nervous because he had just kissed someone for the first time. That's really cute. Yeah. Adorable. And it's nice.
Starting point is 01:06:00 And it's nice. You know, you hear about these young people and their sext sexting and they're IMing pictures of their genitals to each other. Yeah. It's nice that this young man. How about some good, clean American fun? Right. You wait till you're 19. Right.
Starting point is 01:06:17 You make sure that the timing is right. Right. And yeah. And you endure the harassment and critiques of your peers. Sure. And the long walk back from an apartment complex to a dorm. Yeah. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:31 I wonder why she lives in an apartment and he lives in a dorm. Do you think she's much older? She's an uptown girl. Could be. Yeah. I hope she's like 45. I hope she's 45 too. And yeah.
Starting point is 01:06:40 And I hope this is her like, this is just some extreme pool boy situation for her. I hope she is like a wealthy – No, that would turn out terrible for him. A wealthy cougar. Well, that's a good story. He would have a good first kiss story. He'd be like, my first kiss. Whatever the case, good for you.
Starting point is 01:06:55 With a wealthy countess at the other side of town. I guess she would have more than an apartment. Well, yeah. Let's think more about her. Yeah. Who is that woman? Well, good for you, Alyssa. I mean, I think we, in general, as a podcast, support kissing.
Starting point is 01:07:11 Sure. I think we like it. We think it's a great way to show affection. You should put that on their banner. Do you have a banner? No. I'm sorry. We probably should have a banner.
Starting point is 01:07:21 If you had a banner, you should say, you know, supports kissing. Right. Right. Exclamation point. Because you know what? So you should say, you know, supports kissing. Right. Exclamation point. Because you know what? So many people come out as anti-kissing. I know. Such a strong anti-kissing lobby.
Starting point is 01:07:35 You've got Mitt Romney and Paul Ryan up there saying don't kiss. Sing it, brother. But you know what? I think we should be able to. Call me a bleeding heart lefty. You know, maybe I'm leading the other pinkos to the Kremlin here. Finally, someone is saying this. I think kissing is okay. And I don't care which Republican right-wing hayseed knows that that's what I think.
Starting point is 01:07:57 God bless you, Jordan Morris. Thank you. I'm sorry. I don't like to get political on this show, but sometimes I just get so angry. He has such heart, you know. That's really amazing. That's what I always say about him. Passionate. St, but sometimes I just get so angry. He has such heart, you know. That's really amazing. That's what I always say about him. Passionate.
Starting point is 01:08:06 Stands up for his beliefs. Passionate. Yeah. Lindsay, do we have any more calls? We have one more call. Let's listen. Hey, Jordan, Jesse Go. This is Melissa Hahn in Asheville, North Carolina, also known as Beer City, USA.
Starting point is 01:08:19 And I work at a brewery, and today I got to make my very own beer for the first time on their awesome equipment and it was amazing. Also, it's my birthday. So pretty amazing. Love the show. Thanks. Drunk or not drunk? Oh, certainly drunk. Yeah, absolutely. Certainly drunk. Do you think they let her make it from scratch? What do you think is the – I wonder. You know, I don't really know. I'm aware that home brewing is a thing, but I don't really know what goes into it. It seems like a process. Isn't there something that has to ferment? Yeah, it takes a while.
Starting point is 01:08:55 It takes a while. And I guess that is quite an achievement if you can ferment something and time it so that it's exactly right on your birthday. Oh, I hadn't thought of that. I don't know. Is that what she was doing? Do you think that? Maybe they just have like a quicker. Or did she just start the process that day?
Starting point is 01:09:08 Oh, maybe she started a process. It sounded like she did whatever she had to do and then drank it. Yeah. Yeah, maybe. We should dedicate at least 20 minutes to this thing that we don't know. Not even a few of us know. Speculating about home brewing. Tune in next week.
Starting point is 01:09:22 We'll be talking about farm equipment and how it works. Open heart surgery. How do you do it? It seems like that they would take some kind of a sharp object and just kind of make an incision of some kind. Yeah. How do you – it's behind the ribs. So if you go through the slot, do you remove the rib? I think you crack it open.
Starting point is 01:09:42 Well, I don't know. There's literally no way to find out check out my webinar um so this is an also interesting what she said uh ashville north carolina um beer city usa bria as as as an austinite do you take offense to that do you think that austin should be beer city usa oh i don't think so. Yeah? No. Okay. Sorry. Have you been to Asheville, North Carolina? No. Is that why you're saying that?
Starting point is 01:10:07 Oh, no. I mean, there's actually not as much brewing happening in Austin. Oh, I guess there's more drinking than there is. Drinking. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We have like quite – for some reason we have more like tequilas and stuff happening there. And vodkas. A couple of vodkas from there.
Starting point is 01:10:22 But yeah. Tito's Handmade Vodka. Correct. Austin. God, that is good. I only had that for the first time. I've never had that. It's an Austin thing. Yeah. and vodkas a couple of vodkas from there Tito's handmade vodka correct Austin god that is good I only had that for the first time I've never had that
Starting point is 01:10:28 it's an Austin thing yeah it's a thing Tito is like a guy he's a dude he walks around Austin is he? I mean not like
Starting point is 01:10:35 walks around Austin that's like if Mr. Peanut was a guy I know people who say that they've met him I've never met Tito wow he's everywhere
Starting point is 01:10:42 he's just like hands out vodka on the street to children has a sack yeah he's like Santa Claus I'm Tito. I don't know if I'm acting like him. He's everywhere. He's just like, hands out vodka on the street. Doesn't he? That would be great. To children. Has a sack. Yeah. He's like Santa Claus. I'm Tito. No, but he is. He is like an Austin institution. How interesting. Huh. Yeah, but I guess, so I guess Austin, I guess I mean, every time I've been to Austin, I have just had more beers than I know I could drink. Because they're like a dollar. Right. That's, yeah.
Starting point is 01:11:03 So maybe it's not the beard capital of the world. It's the drunk capital of the world. Yeah. It's the lush capital of the world. Okay. A little bit. That's fair. Well, if you have had a momentous occasion or want to ask us a question or just want
Starting point is 01:11:16 to hear your voice on a podcast, give us a call at 206-984-4FUN. We'll be back in just a minute on Jordan, Jesse, Go. Once again, I would like to mention that support for Jordan, Jesse, Go comes from Audible.com. They're a provider of high-quality digital audiobooks and more. They've got over 100,000 downloadable titles across all types of literature, fiction, nonfiction, periodicals, and tons more. They suggest that Jordan, Jesse, Go! listeners might enjoy They Call Me Baba Booey by Gary Delebate and Chad Millman
Starting point is 01:12:01 or My Mother Was Nuts by Penny Marshall. You can get a free audiobook and a free 30-day trial membership if you just go to audiblepodcast.com slash JJGO. That's audiblepodcast.com slash JJGO. And we've got Jumbotrons this week, folks. Jessica Alpern cuts paper. It's an Etsy store with handmade paper cut art for unique people. Hey guys, Jessica just recently quit her day job to pursue this full time. So if you like that, if you like high quality
Starting point is 01:12:33 unique art, go to Etsy.com slash shop slash Jessica Alpern. That's J-E-S-S-I-C-A-L-P-E-R-N and add some color or silhouette to your life. Also this week on the Jumbotron, S-V-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E-L-T-S-V-E- Svelte Design. They've got a Kickstarter going where you can get some special discounts. Search for SVLT on kickstarter.com or visit svlt.net for more information. That's Svelte, high quality, minimalist, concrete furniture. Supporting Jordan and Jesse Go this week. If you want to get up here on the Jumbotron, email Teresa at MaximumFun.org. Reasonable rates. Loyal audience. The Jumbotron is the place to go for that. Okay, now back to the show. Love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, Oh, I was going to. Okay. All right. Yeah. We love Deepfee. Yeah. Brea Deepfee Grant. Terrific. Andrew Secunda.
Starting point is 01:14:06 Really just kind of lost and aimless intergalactic space pirate. Yeah. I mean, just looking for a crew, looking for a barge. Yeah. Just need some work. And I don't know. There's something wrong with the ship and I can't quite figure out if it's in the engines or what. You know what maybe I would suggest?
Starting point is 01:14:25 What's that? Maybe get your notary license. Maybe that's it. Maybe it's just change of pace. Intergalactic notary. Real estate maybe? Could be. Real estate license?
Starting point is 01:14:34 Yeah, that's a great way to make a little fast money for sure. Thanks, guys. Yeah. Appreciate it. And maybe franchise a Cinnabon. Open up one of those in an airport or something? Cinnabons are very different in space. Oh, really?
Starting point is 01:14:47 Oh, gross. They're just, yeah. They're not edible. Sounds gross, yeah. Okay. And they're alive. Yeah, you have to kill it before you eat it. Yeah, and it plants an egg in your sternum.
Starting point is 01:14:58 And then when it comes out, it's delicious. So the three of us have a new web series that will be online as of this broadcast. It's called Game Shop. It's at YouTube.com slash start. I think there is a lot for everybody to enjoy in this program. This sounds very couched. Well, I was going to say – I was going to make the distinction that I think it is set in a game store and it is bankrolled by a video game website, IGN. Correct.
Starting point is 01:15:27 I think that a general audience can appreciate this, but I also think we've slipped in some deep cuts too. I think that's an accurate evaluation overall. Let me ask you guys a question that we haven't talked about off the air. IGN is now for sale. Ooh, you want to buy it? Guys, let's pool our money.
Starting point is 01:15:45 I just didn't know if that affected anything for us. Oh, that's a good question. This shows you how little people usually know about the things going on behind the scenes where I'm an actor and people are like, how's NBC doing? I'm like, what? I don't know. Sure. I hope it's not sold before it's put up.
Starting point is 01:16:01 Well, I know now it is a News Corp property. It is owned by the same kind of tentacle monster that owns Fox and the Wall Street Journal. Yes. So, oh, interesting. I didn't know. I don't know if it's for sale or not. It's for sale.
Starting point is 01:16:18 It's not on the internet. On Craigslist? It's on Craigslist. One, yeah, one all-purpose male-focused website. Can send photos. Oh, interesting. It fits in that we have almost universally right-wing rhetoric in the show. Yeah, there's a – I mean I know that I went off on a little bit of a partisan jag, but I think for this series they wanted it to be very heartland, very – so yeah, there is a lot of right-wing rhetoric.
Starting point is 01:16:45 Interesting. But yeah, but we do – I think I alluded to this on last week's show, but I'll say it again because I think it speaks to the amount of detail that went into this show. And it's something I'm very proud of is that we wrote a joke where Andy, your character, his one big success was creating a ripoff of Tetris that only appeared on the Panasonic 3DO. Correct. A Jordan Morris detail. We wanted to see a 3DO later in the series, so some poor PA had to drive out to Pomona,
Starting point is 01:17:18 which is one of the assier suburbs of L.A., and get a Craigslist 3DO because we had to see it in the show. Correct. And we put it in there. I said 3DO at some point. Yeah. Yeah. It's in there.
Starting point is 01:17:31 And Bria wires it to create – I'm giving away a little bit but I think it's OK because it's so out of left field. Yeah. She creates a temporal rift by wiring it to an Xbox and a PS2, which is just a great convergence of several nerd and sci-fi specifics at once that really pleased me. So gamers should watch it. Non-gamers or casual gamers. I kind of blew your argument that it appeals to everyone. Just said. No, no, no. I think non-gamers or casual gamers I kind of blew your argument that it appeals to everyone just said just said
Starting point is 01:18:06 no no no I think it's I think non-gamers also will enjoy I think it's yeah I mean we I think we were pretty careful to structure it in such a way
Starting point is 01:18:13 that even the deep cuts has context so everyone understands there's still jokes it's not just someone leaning in and saying Dreamcast which would be hilarious
Starting point is 01:18:22 which would be hilarious and probably probably good for good for our numbers now that I think about it. Season two, guys. Season two. Season two. Somebody will just yell Dreamcast. If IGN still exists at that point.
Starting point is 01:18:34 Right. Or if it's – yeah, or maybe it will be sold to a – Bill O'Reilly. Bill O'Reilly. Bill O'Reilly will personally buy it. Bill O'Reilly's. Bill O'Reilly's. Bill O'Reilly will personally buy it. Bill O'Reilly's game corner. He's like a big fan of him playing video games. Yeah, Borderlands 2 is great.
Starting point is 01:18:53 Also, Mexicans should get jobs. Bill O'Reilly. Bria, you alluded to a comic book that you had written is coming out soon or might even be out as of this broadcast as of this broadcast I believe so what is it and where can people get it? it's called Let's Play God and they can get it at any comic book store it's on IDW so it's
Starting point is 01:19:15 it should be out at any comic book store as long as they ordered it and if they didn't you should tell them to go fucking order it because they should have it because if there's one thing that guys who work at comic book stores like, it's being confronted. They like hard confrontation. They respond well to it. No, but yeah.
Starting point is 01:19:36 But just fucking request it. Be polite about it. Request it at your local comic book shop. If they say no, then urinate on the counter. Right, sure. Exactly. Standard procedure. And then just tell them I sent you.
Starting point is 01:19:49 Yeah, there you go. The author personally said. She said. The co-author. That this was cool. The co-author, yes. Well, terrific. Anything else anywhere on the internet that people can find you if they want to follow you on Twitter?
Starting point is 01:20:02 Twitter. You're delightful on there. Yeah, it's just Bria Grant. I was like, at? You don't have to say at. I wonder. At symbol. I feel like I still say at when I do Twitter.
Starting point is 01:20:13 But is that like your mom saying, go to www. HTTP. I don't think it is yet, but it depends on who listens to this in the future. I'm Bria Grant on Twitter. I'm good about tweeting the things that are happening, I think Bria Grant on Twitter. No, it's just... And that's... I'm good about tweeting the things that are happening, I think.
Starting point is 01:20:28 Yeah. Kind of. If a thing's happening, you'll tweet about it. Sure. Like a couple of things, not all things. Right.
Starting point is 01:20:35 Like not everything in the universe. Sure. Right. Am I being clear? If someone invents a new kind of sandwich... I'd probably tweet about that.
Starting point is 01:20:43 Oh, okay. So sandwich news. Yeah. Comic book news. This morning I saw you wrote, I lost my keys. Oh no, wait probably tweet about that. Oh, okay. So sandwich news. Yeah. Comic book news. This morning I saw you wrote, I lost my keys. Oh, no. Wait. I found them.
Starting point is 01:20:49 No, no. I did not write that. Oh, no? No? I guess I'm sorry. I must have been a genius. But I would tweet that. Yeah.
Starting point is 01:20:53 That would also count. Sure. That's a good thing. So key locations. Maybe links to videos of yourself wearing deep Vs. And deep Vs. Yeah. Guys, tune in.
Starting point is 01:21:02 Andy, I think, I suggest after people go and watch Game Shop, which they should, they should watch some of your Children's Hospital webisodes. They're very funny. Why not? They're like what ifs, right? That's right. What if, you know, they're like, I mean, to use a comic book parlance, they are kind of what if stories. Right. And are they, do they have the same cast as the Children's Hospital?
Starting point is 01:21:23 Same cast. Oh, I love it. Malin Ackerman, Rob Corddry, Henry Winkler, all the gang. Yeah. And are they, do they have the same cast as the Children's Hospital? Same cast. Oh, I love it. Malin Ackerman, Rob Corddry, Henry Winkler, all the gang. Yeah. It was really exciting. That's very fun. Not part of the official continuity. No, they're not canonical to coin a Jordan Morris term.
Starting point is 01:21:37 I don't know that you invented that term. You made that up, right? I do enjoy talking about it. But it was referenced in the show. But yeah, I don't think they're, that's the whole charm of it is that they're – although Children's Hospital has no continuous universe. I don't think so. Corddry is very proud of the fact that it's completely a new world every episode. I was very excited at the prospect that it would sync up with NTSF SDSUV.
Starting point is 01:22:08 Yeah. And I think we asked Paul Scheer about that the last time he was here, and it hadn't crossed his mind that they could do that, and I was very disappointed. I'm like, guys, build a world. Build a complicated world. I think I was at a Q&A with them where someone asked that same question. So clearly there is a desire for it. People want you to build a world. Sure.
Starting point is 01:22:29 A complicated world. I'm with you. To build graphs and charts about. I'm with you. I really hope that on season two of Game Shop we have enough time to really build a complex, just huge, depthful backstory. Sure. I mean, Tolkienian, I think, is what we want. A new language.
Starting point is 01:22:46 Just everything. Lineages. We'll have people from the guild come over, buy things at the store. I would love that. Oh, yeah. We'll do some crossovers. I think there's some hints that our show is in the same world as the guild. I think that's true.
Starting point is 01:22:57 Sure. Well, yeah. Yeah. I mean, we didn't write it in there. Tabletop gamers next door? Yeah, sure, sure, sure. Yeah, that could be. That could be.
Starting point is 01:23:04 Yeah. Maybe we'll work it in there. All right. Those guys were sure sure yeah that could yeah maybe we'll work it in there those guys were really funny I'm excited for the episode oh yeah some
Starting point is 01:23:09 there are rivals at the game shop are the guys who work in the strip mall at the tabletop gaming store yes
Starting point is 01:23:17 and some great guys came in to do some guest work on that I think you should watch the show Andy you're on the you're on the Twitter,
Starting point is 01:23:25 at Secunda? That's right. At. I'm saying at. Fuck it. If you're going for it, sure. HTTP. Because otherwise it doesn't sound
Starting point is 01:23:30 like it's anything. Twitter.com slash. At Secunda says, I've accomplished something. Yeah. True. Well, yeah, guys, thanks so much for being here.
Starting point is 01:23:41 Jesse will be back next week. Thank God. Boo. I know. Or maybe he won't. Maybe the fans will just demand that this is the show now. Is it? A permanent fixture on Judge John... Jordan Jesse Go. No, the other one. Oh, yeah. Judge John Hodgman.
Starting point is 01:23:55 Judge John Hodgman. Yeah. I had to settle a continuity debate about Judge John Hodgman and Jordan Jesse Go, too. Those are parallel universes. Are they? Yeah. So he is the same character or he is not the same character? No, Jesse is a different character in Judge John Hodgman than he is on Jordan Jesse Go. So just to clear that up. Gotcha.
Starting point is 01:24:14 So he could be killed on that one and still be on this one? Yes. Yes, he could. Gotcha. Yes. Great. So we've cleared that up. I've said it.
Starting point is 01:24:20 It's canon. It's basically like George Lucas is saying. The novels count. Right. I'm lost right now. I have no idea what's going on. Case closed. Are we still in this room?
Starting point is 01:24:28 We are. We'll see you next week on Jordan, Jesse, go. Take care.

There aren't comments yet for this episode. Click on any sentence in the transcript to leave a comment.