Jordan, Jesse, GO! - Ep. 612: Functional Ribbon with Sierra Katow
Episode Date: November 26, 2019Sierra Katow (Stay Podsitive Podcast, Earth to Ned on Disney+) joins Jordan and Jesse for a discussion of how Jesse likes hearing about the notes of certain bottles of liquor and wine even though he ...doesn't drink, the recent beverage-shaming Jordan experienced at work, and Sierra's fancy jacket and the various ribbons attached to it. Plus, Jesse takes a few minutes at the end of the show to give a moving tribute to a childhood friend who overdosed last week. If you want to help bring some positivity to this tragedy, please consider joining MaxFun in donating to Homeless Youth, a SF charity that works hard to improve the lives of homeless kids in the Bay Area. Go to MaximumFun.org/evan Action Item: have holiday questions? Send them in -- 206-984-4FUN or JJGo@MaximumFun.org
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Give a little time for the child within you, don't be afraid to be young and free.
Undo the locks and throw away the keys and take off your shoes and socks and run you.
It's Jordan, Jesse Goh. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart.
Jordan Morris had a glass of wine at dinner.
Oh my gosh, Jordan.
So, you know, if my tongue is a little loose this episode, blame the vino, as they say. Can I just episode. Blame the vino, as they say.
Can I just say?
Blame the vino.
Loose lips sink ships.
Well, we're going down, baby.
Man the lifeboats, women and children first.
These lips is loose, and I'm going to tell you exactly what I think about you.
Finally, you're a great friend, and I love doing the show.
And Brian, you can go
fuck yourself. Yes, suck it, B.
Fuck yourself. I'm not even drunk
and I'm saying you can go fuck yourself.
Long walk, short pier.
Brian, you're
doing a great job and it's always a pleasure to see you.
Jordan, can I ask what type
of wine was it? Did you go
grige? Oh, no,? Did you go grige?
Oh, no, I didn't go grige.
I got the red.
Uh-huh.
Just whatever the house red is at Fatburger on Wilshire.
So I would say it had notes.
It had notes of kind of a floral bouquet, but I would say that the baseline was a headache I'll have later.
That was the main.
I have to say, Jordan, I don't drink.
Well, I am known the world over as the king of drugs.
Sure.
I don't drink alcohol. And I don't think there is anything I enjoy more than buying alcohol at an alcohol store.
Like at a BevMo?
Not a BevMo.
A BevMo is a little too...
Vast.
Yeah, vast and fluorescent lit.
Although I did, look, I went to the BevMo to buy some E40 tequila brand for our friend Ben Harrison from Greatest Generation Ones.
But no, I prefer to go to the fanciest liquor store on earth and then have them tell me about all the things.
And then I just like nod like, yeah.
I understand this.
Yeah, sure.
I also know about notes.
I also really like to talk to the wine guy at Costco.
Oh.
The wine guy at Costco.
Right.
He just wandered out of a Jimmy Buffett concert and into the Costco and they just handed him an apron and said, you're the wine guy now.
Right.
He brings his own folding chair.
Yeah.
And that guy and his ponytail are such a delight.
So which of these, I'll say to him,
which of these Chardonnays is okiest?
And he'll know.
He'll have something right off the dome.
Yeah, he demands an expert.
That's how he got the job, that.
And he was there at the right time
because of when the Jimmy Buffett concert went out.
And then you buy a unit of wine that is the size of an Arrowhead water jug.
Yes.
I only shop by Magnum.
Right.
Sure.
Can you just buy a normal bottle of wine at Costco?
Oh, yeah.
They got tons of normal bottles of wine.
They're not like drums or jugs, right?
You can also buy drums and jugs, but primarily it's normal
bottles of wine at affordable prices.
Right. I only want the amount of wine that would
be thrown at me by Donkey Kong.
That's how much wine I need.
I want to know what the notes are.
If I'm going to buy, like, I'll
go into
a liquor store.
The other day was my friend Dimitri's birthday.
We're headed over there.
We want to bring Dimitri a gift.
Right.
I know he's a whiskey fan, so I'm going to go in the fancy liquor store, and I'm going to have them describe to me all the whiskeys.
Right.
I'll nod sagely as though I understand what the difference between the tastes of wood are.
You look like a man who would have whiskey opinions.
That is absolutely.
I look like a man who would have those ice cubes that you freeze,
but they don't melt.
Right.
Right.
I've gotten my stepdad those for the last three Christmases.
He always stoked to get them.
But I love it.
I bought Dimitri something made by Welsh women.
Oh, really?
A whiskey made by Welsh women that came very highly recommended.
It's a little tongue twister.
From that guy at the liquor store.
Should we introduce our guest on the program?
I would love to.
She's a stand-up comic, comedy writer.
Her name is Sierra Cotto. Love to. She's a stand-up comic, comedy writer.
Her name is Sierra Cotto.
Wow.
That was great.
Thank you.
Sierra, welcome to the program.
Joy to have you here. Thank you so much.
I'm very excited to be here.
Thank you for wearing party jackets here.
This is my only jacket, and I wear it all the time.
You've already seen it, Jordan.
I have seen it.
And when you walked in wearing the jacket that
I had already seen, I judged you.
Okay. Harshly
too. Alright, well,
this is what I ordered online
and it came in the
mail and then I was like, only this jacket
from here on out. Sierra, I gotta tell you,
when I walked in, and I was a few minutes
late because I just recorded an episode of Go Fact
Yourself with past guest Helen Hong and of course the great J. Keith Van Straten. When I walked in, and I was a few minutes late because I just recorded an episode of Go Fact Yourself with past guest Helen Hong and, of course, the great J. Keith Van Straten.
When I walked in, I said, well, first thing I said, well, this must be Sierra Cotto because I had not yet met you.
True. First time.
And I said to myself, what a jacket.
That's what I said, Jordan.
See, that's appropriate.
Velvet?
No, I guess you don't know this jacket as well as you say.
Oh, yeah.
It's sort of a fake satiny kind of thing going on.
Okay, like a crinkly satin that suggests velvet.
Yeah, yeah, exactly.
And, you know, it's got this ribbon here that comes untied, and I have to tie it with one
arm, and it's impossible.
So lots of good features.
What does the ribbon do?
I don't know.
Is it purely ornamental?
Is it holding something up?
Oh, purely ornamental.
Okay.
Yes, yes.
No function.
That would be silly.
That's so that people can see that she doesn't have any cards up her sleeve.
Right, right, right.
Sure, when you do your close-up magic.
You really left that off her list of credits, Jessie.
It's okay.
It's an aspiration more so.
Yeah.
I guess I don't know.
We know each other a little bit.
We've known each other for a couple weeks now. But I guess I don't know. When we were having the drinking conversation, I guess i don't know i we know each other a little bit we've known each other for a couple weeks now but i guess i don't know in the when we were having the drinking
conversation i guess i don't know do you are you are you a wine person are you a non-drinker do
you like a cocktail oh wow um yeah how do you feel about the wine at fatburger now i gotta go try it
i haven't but it sounds delicious um okay great um yeah i would say i love oh i've gotten into martinis
okay which is a little bit much but it's a lot of fun and i feel like um a real
sophisticated kind of martini drinker girl it's such a good order you know it just sounds so good
getting ordered you know yeah the first time i the first time i felt like i could like order
something that sounded good i someone just told me order a seven and seven just do it like before i
knew what drinking was good and i started that was my first one and i haven't had one in a long time
what is that i don't know oh uh it's like seagram seven which is whiskey and seven up
so it is a it is a baby drink, but also,
but it,
it,
it sounds classy and it seems like you're ordering it deliberately because,
you know,
of Mad Men or whatever.
The thing about a martini that I,
as a non drinker,
don't understand.
And I don't think I've ever tasted a martini.
I'll occasionally taste my wife's cocktail.
Like it's fancy,
you know,
I feel fancy when I do it. And a martini. I'll occasionally taste my wife's cocktail. It's fancy. I feel fancy when I do it.
And a martini.
If you want that fancy feeling, just get some ornamental ribbons on your jacket.
I'd love to.
All these ribbons are so functional.
I feel like such a plebe.
I look at a martini and I say to myself, huh, an olive drink.
Ooh, but you got to get that olive in there.
You got to get the olive and the olive juice.
When someone orders the extra dirty martini and it gets served to them and it looks foggy and there's a little tint of brown.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Honestly, nothing grosses me more.
A little tint of brown?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Honestly, nothing grosses me more.
Nothing is more gross than that vague little ribbon of brown that is swimming around in the glass.
What about those Clamato commercials where the clam and the tomato dance together on ice?
Whoa.
Is that real?
Yeah, that was pretty gross.
Wow. That was a real thing that definitely—
Clamato is what you ask for, the one you raise your glass for, the pick-me-up that picks you up.
You don't remember that?
Oh, you know, I think I have seen a version of that commercial, but it's online only where they fuck.
Well, yeah, sure.
It's hot.
Honestly, I'll say it.
It's hot.
Yeah, Daddy likes it nasty.
Sure.
Something weird in this fat burger that I was having my glass of wine in was that they were playing the game, you know, the big game.
The football game.
Oh, sure.
Well, it's football time.
It's football time, and they were playing the football game.
It's autumn.
That means footballs are in season.
Pick them right off the tree.
Yeah, me and my family, we go up to Maine, and you pluck the football right off the tree.
Yeah.
And you crack it right into your mouth.
Yeah.
So they were playing the game on most of the TVs.
But on one wall, there were three TVs and they were all showing a soundless rerun of Saved by the Bell, The College Years.
Wow.
Yeah.
Yeah.
That's not a sight I want to see.
No.
And it had been like, it had been like, obviously these were shot in SD, but they had been like
stretched to HD, making it all the more unpleasant.
Wow.
I'd like to see a wide Slater.
Sure.
Slater looks good wide.
I presume you requested that.
Right.
Can we crank the volume on this?
Yeah, you're one guy standing
Can we turn down the Packers game?
And can we crank this
Saved by the Bell to college years?
That makes sense
I have a question
Is it a horny show?
I don't remember ever watching the college years
Yeah, I don't either
I think I had, you know, I had.
Sierra, what's your before we continue with this conversation?
R.E. Saved by the Bell of college years, horny or not.
Yeah.
What is your relationship with the Saved by the Bell franchise?
Oh, man.
Minimal.
Minimal.
Yeah, I know about it.
I think I had seen some, but it was never like my favorite show.
And I think it was a little bit before maybe I would have been into that.
I don't know.
We're dinosaurs.
We get it.
I don't know.
You were all about that one where the people live in California and they have their own band.
California Dreams.
Right.
The sophisticated after school live action teen sitcom.
Well, I mean, if you're drinking an olive drink, watch California Dreams.
Yeah, sipping that martini.
Dreaming that Cali dream.
The martini and the dreams.
I didn't know we were freestyle rapping, guys.
Oh, we're not.
I didn't mean to infer
because if I suggested that, let's shut it
down, please. Because that can only
get us into trouble.
What was the top... What is the thing that you would click on a clickbait BuzzFeed quiz about that showed up on Facebook?
The start of blank is blank.
You won't believe it now.
I didn't structure that correctly.
But you get what I'm getting at. Yeah, Of the time, the zeitgeist of my life, I would say,
well, probably like Gossip Girl. Okay. Or Great Scarves.
Good Scarves, style, fashion. Sure. Upper East Side Manhattan. What is it? What does it mean?
I don't know. Still don't know. Still have no idea. And yeah, I guess that.
And then what?
I don't know.
I also like I didn't have like cable for a while.
So I was sort of like catching up late.
So I was like watching SpongeBob into high school.
You know what I mean?
I was very like, ooh, this is what I was missing out on.
You know, when you when you happen to be on vacation in the hotel rooms have Cartoon Network.
Right.
I'm on that Dexter game, you know.
Sure.
Yeah.
Dexter's Lab, not Dexter Showtime.
Right, yes.
But, you know, so I think it was –
Who's this cat dog I've been hearing so much about?
It was a real crash course.
Sure.
But, yeah, so I don't know if I'm the best representation of what I should know.
I get it.
I would watch Danger Mouse right now.
If you put it on a television in front of me, I'm still so jealous of my friend Jody Scott for having cable, getting to watch Danger Mouse whenever I don't know what Danger Mouse is.
And the accompanying cartoon Bananaman.
Yeah.
Remember Bananaman?
I don't remember any of them.
No.
I didn't get to see it.
Well.
Only Jody got to see it.
Along with Premier League football, whatever that is.
Man.
One of his parents is English.
Oh, okay.
Yeah. Yeah. So Saved by the Bell. bell i don't know i don't never kept so saved by the bell based on the one that i kind of
half watched in fat burger today uh-huh um zach was there yeah slater was there i believe you know
screech was there oh yeah he was hanging on to Saved by the Bell franchise perhaps longer than any of the OG cast.
Yeah.
Then he moved on to his second career, Stabbing.
Right.
Yes.
Stabbing in Reno.
Yeah.
Reno, Tahoe.
Yeah.
Are those the same place?
Yeah.
Hard to say.
Roughly.
Reno, Tahoe.
Reno, Tahoe.
Yeah.
So, yeah.
But it did not seem particularly horny.
They did not seem scantily clad.
I mean, I think that, you know, for folks our age who Saved by the Bell was like the only thing on TV between 3 p.m. and 5 p.m.
Right.
You had a lot of your early feelings about the characters on that show.
Right.
Hunks and babes, they all were.
Yeah, sure. Mandatory.
Mandatory, yeah. But this one
did not... I don't know.
Maybe if this was your Saved by the Bell,
you were having those feelings
as well. I still, by the way, have a mandatory
hunk policy. Hunks only!
Wow. Sure.
Yeah, bring me those hunks.
No dweebs.
Keep the dweebs out, hunks in.
Sorry, Poindexter.
If you haven't kicked sand on a dweeb at the beach, you are not welcome.
Kick sand or kick rocks.
So these hunks, the hunks also kind of have to be anti-dweeb.
Yeah.
Well, that's part of what being a hunk is.
Yeah.
Right.
Unless it's the kind of hunk who takes off his glasses and turns hunky.
Glasses make you a nerd.
An ex-dweeb hunk.
Sure.
Yeah.
Hey, you know, can I back up for a hot second to the topic of beverages?
I would love to talk about beverages.
Okay.
Well, this is actually less of a topic and more of a confrontation.
Okay.
Okay. Well, this is actually less of a topic and more of a confrontation.
Okay.
Sierra, I want to talk about the public beverage shaming that happened.
Oh, yes. Oh, yes. Ooh, sorry.
Wow. I was shamed publicly for a beverage choice.
So the two of you cyber bullied, I would maybe call it.
Yeah, cyber bullied and live bullied.
So, yeah, cyber and IRL.
The two of you have been working together as comedy writers on a television program.
So that's how the two of you know each other.
Was this something that took place in a work setting?
Making it all the more unprofessional.
Wow.
Yeah, I mean, but at the end of the day, Jordan here was fully, okay.
Yeah.
Let's rush him on this.
OK.
OK.
OK.
You tell your version and I'll say what actually happened.
Happy to do it.
Thank you.
Happy to do it.
Then finally I will tell my version.
Sure.
Exactly.
And I was in a duck.
Oh.
A duck, you say.
Yes.
And then Jordan Lucas will steal it all.
I don't know.
Anyway.
I mean, OK.
So I think the first time.
Well, it seems like you've keened in on, you know, making the after lunch pilgrimage to check out the dessert selection.
So, you know, sometimes you got a little cake.
Sometimes you got a little brownie.
You know, we're, you know, hashtag privilege.
Like, sure.
Hashtag blessed.
Hashtag blessed.
Hashtag set life.
Yeah, yeah.
I know.
It's great stuff. But, yeah, I think. Hashtag Hollywood. Hashtag Jeremy P So, yeah, yeah, I know. It's it's great stuff. But, uh, yeah, I think maybe Hollywood. Exactly. And hashtag daddy's no, no. Am I doing this right? I think so. No, none. And then I think you got, you know, maybe a brownie or a chocolate cake type thing.
Right.
And then he proceeded to fill, take a plastic cup and then go into the fridge.
So, you know, it's not like it's out.
It's like you got to make your, you got to make, go out of your way into this machine called a refrigerator.
What is this machine?
I'm unfamiliar with it.
Open that heavy door and pull out, you know, there's a selection of milks, but milk, milk,
cow's milk, and fill that up, carry it all the way back to the room, you know, up some
steps and then drink that in front of everybody.
So.
And yes, it was noted.
It was just noted.
There's a couple lactose intolerant people in the room.
So I think there's just a general like anti-dairy tone.
So people were angry that he was having a beverage they couldn't have.
I think that's wrapped into it.
Did they feel taunted?
Potentially, but it was shaming.
So they were trying to taunt.
I love to pound a beer in front of an alcoholic.
So here's what – but it wasn't just you remarking on it.
It was –
Then I took to the medias.
It was filmed and put on the internet.
Okay.
I'm sorry.
I'm saying my version.
We're not to my – I didn't mean to interrupt you.
Carry on.
I want to be clear.
I've known Jordan a long time.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
And he doesn't only drink milk.
He drinks lemonade sometimes.
I'd say roughly.
And then I'll go around the corner once in a while.
Two milk steams.
Per lemonade.
Right.
Okay, good.
One third lemonade.
I suppose you've got to cut the milk with some acid.
Right, yes.
Yeah.
Well, you know, if you plan on going around the corner.
So, Sierra, what happened?
So, Jordan sits down.
So, he walks over.
Was the food
in the writer's room
that he was eating?
Yeah, he also brought
the dessert bowl
with the milk.
But here's what I'm trying
to drive at, Sierra,
and this is important,
so please pay attention.
Did he
get the food
from a different location
than the milk?
Um, similar location,
but I would say it wasn't on the same surface.
Okay. So you
served the foods on surfaces.
It sort of feels like, say there's a buffet
What are you getting at, counselor?
Where's this going?
Your Honor, I stipulate that this is aimless.
Carry on.
I'll allow it, but watch yourself.
So he went to a food and drink area.
But you're suggesting that he took the cup and brought it over to the refrigerator when there was probably, what, squirt on the table?
I mean, sure.
I think there's, you know, the water dispenser.
Right.
We're thinking, you know, just the usual stuff.
But the milk.
Fresca.
Yeah, the milk was a bold choice.
Cactus cooler, of course.
Sure, sure.
A little, yeah.
Sure, a grapefruit haritos.
Those are all options. You know, but he swerved, went. A little, yeah. Sure, a grapefruit haritos. Those are all options.
But he swerved, went for the milk.
So then he brought this back up
to the writer's room where people were
trying to work, and
were those people,
did those people have beverages and food of their own,
or was he the lone wolf here?
I think throughout the day, probably
kind of the lone wolf. Throughout the day, we have our coffee.
We have our LaCroix.
Some water might get involved.
These are classic office beverages.
Yeah, but the minute you introduce something opaque, it's white and opaque.
Yeah, and there's also just a lot of selections of almond milk or oat milk, which is very trendy right now.
I don't know.
Again, I'm—
Are you accusing him of being off-trend?
I mean, I think that's possibly where all of our vitriol came from, you know?
We're just real trendy bitches over here.
I'm starting a new trend right now.
Buttermilk for breakfast.
Lots of buttermilk for breakfast.
Right.
Yeah.
I'm starting a new trend where you pound the jug of milk until your stomach can't handle the lactic acid and it forces you to throw up like in Jackass.
Yeah.
So, Jordan, what's your perspective on this situation?
So, okay.
So I am, as me, as a standard man.
Yeah.
A normal man with no.
A classic man.
A classic man with no quirks.
You're a man with desires.
Sure.
Yes.
You weren't born a machine.
No.
I mean, I listen when, God, what are the names of the characters saved by the bell?
Kelly, Jesse, and Slater and Zach.
I was great.
They did the sexy calendar where they all wore in workout outfits.
I felt feelings inside me.
I'm not made of stone.
You needed a cool thirst-slinging
shirt from the teat of a cow.
It was time
for it. I wanted to have a little dessert
after lunch to get that
end-of-the-day pep.
I selected a brownie.
It's been a great choice. Thank you!
With or without nuts?
No nuts. Yeah, that's the
preferred brownie. Yeah, I'll take a nutty brownie, but this was what was available.
Whatever brownie you serve me.
Obviously, I can't eat brownies because chocolate is a migraine trigger, but I imagine that I would like to eat any brownie you serve.
Based on past brownie experience, it's one of the best foods.
Sure.
I would love to have any brownie, but I think I'd prefer no nuts.
Yeah, me too.
I'm doing no nut November.
Oh, really?
Congrats.
I don't think that's what it is.
I think that's what it is.
Okay.
Have you been jacking off?
But not with nuts.
Not with nuts, but not using nuts.
He's so out of there.
Once you hand me a brownie, how could I not?
I'm tumescent.
I'm ready to go.
Okay, well. Again, you're not Metastone. of there yeah once you hand me a brownie how could i not i'm tumescent i'm ready to go okay well
uh you're not you're not metastone you're a man with desires exactly um so i so you know i wanted
to drink something and it's a brownie glass of milk very normal so i filled up a glass full of
two percent and i brought it up and sat down and as% is a nice compromise, by the way.
I admire that.
Thank you.
And when I sat down and when people eyed the milk, a shriek went up.
And three different cell phones from three different angles of the room came out and started filming me.
Wow.
Filming me like I was trying to break into a Scientology compound.
And three different Insta stories posted me drinking milk with, what's this guy doing
captions?
Weirdo.
Psycho, I think was actually the term that I used.
Psycho.
Psycho.
And a dancing milk carton was added to my shoulder.
Oh, yeah.
That was me.
That was my doing.
Digitally.
Thank you.
Yeah, mine was the best.
That actually was the best.
It was actually of the cyberbullying, yours was the most artful.
Yeah, I'm very good at that.
Jordan, I don't know if you know this.
I know that you're an elder millennial.
Yeah.
Exennial.
But that's called a deep fake.
So you're suggesting I didn't drink the milk?
No, a deep fake is when you take existing video and audio tracks and you add an animated dancing digital milk carton to it.
Oh, okay.
It's called a deep fake.
Deep fake, okay.
Deep fake.
Interesting. It's a type of May May Deep fake. Okay. Deep fake. Interesting.
It's a type of May May.
Is that like a Cybertruck?
Yeah, it's a Cybertruck.
Is a dancing milk a Cybertruck?
Do you...
Sierra, what was your objection to this?
Because I honestly, I'm trying to imagine eating a brownie with a glass of any of the
standard office beverages, be it Fresca, be it Squirt. I mean, coffee,
a little coffee and a dessert is good.
But it's the end of it. It's 2pm.
I'll be up all night.
I see it now. You know, and I think it's
good to reflect on your own bullying.
Yes, it's good to reflect. Because I do, you know, I realize
okay, I might have gotten a little carried away with the
peer pressure. You say, oh, that's a cool
writer, that's a cool writer, that's a cool writer. That's a cool writer.
But these two cool writers are filming this guy.
I guess I got to jump on board.
You know what I mean?
So I was definitely influenced by peer pressure.
But I will say my history with milk is,
it's also very heavy.
Let's get into it.
I was, you know, as we were,
and I think the knowledge,
the sort of mainstream feel about milk changed in recent years.
But, you know, it was sort of like, oh, you got to drink milk every meal or else you're going to be short, Sarah.
Right, yeah.
You know, you're not going to grow.
And I played basketball.
It was very important that I grew to be over six feet.
And it didn't work.
But, you know, I was fed that for a long time.
So maybe I've been let down by milk, you know?
By the milk industrial complex.
We should explain that you're 5'11".
Yeah, I know.
I was an inch shy.
Just barely.
Okay.
But, you know.
So you associate milk with lies.
Yeah, with lies, deception, and, you know, basketball.
And basketball.
Sierra, are there other instances where you so easily fall victim to peer pressure?
Yeah, for sure.
Like when everybody jumped off that cliff.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I jump off some of those cliffs.
You know, you got to do it.
How are you going to get that clout?
That's true.
Oh, God, I'd love to get clout.
You know, you get enough clout points to get three.
Do you remember the website Clout that gave you points for your social media followers?
I sure hope I would know, but I don't.
No, it was a very bad.
That was me trying to succumb to the peer pressure of knowing what clout.com was.
Later on, I'll be talking about flus, the internet currency, and I'll be talking about
swatch internet time, which was metric, by the way.
Really?
Yeah. That? Yeah.
That's fun.
Parts of 100.
The thing about this instance that I was the most shocked by
was that three different people decided,
I need to film this.
I need to film this man drinking milk.
Just for content.
No, not a nip.
I mean, I think the nip stayed in the shirt.
The nips were in the shirt, but the content,
you got to do it for the gram. I think that's part shirt. But the content, you got to do it for the gram.
I think that's part of the peer pressure thing.
You got to do it for the gram.
Did it occur to you it might be cruel, Sierra, to put a man on the gram?
Who's gram abstentious?
This is a man with no gram.
You're right.
I don't think we knew it at the time.
And then we were trying to tag him, and then he revealed no gram.
Not even his cat.
Not even my cat does not have a gram.
And because you guys all posted that, my kids' moms found me and now there's many child support.
Which is what I was trying to avoid.
Yeah.
Sorry.
Yeah.
You got to save that money for milk.
I got to.
I have a – listen.
I have a milk problem and I don't want my kids getting their hands on daddy's milk money. Daddy being
me. Okay. Let's take a break. I think we've settled this beef or I should say dairy. We'll
be back. You know what? That was good. What a, Jesse Go.
It's Jordan, Jesse Go.
I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart.
Jordan Morris, boy detective.
And Sierra Cotto, unfunctional ribbon girl.
Yeah, that's what she's known as.
Serves no function. That's how she's to be distinguished from, I was going to say her whole name, but Mary,
the girl I went to high school with who would do her interpretation of rhythmic gymnastics
in the cafeteria.
That was a functional ribbon.
She was professionally trained.
That's functional.
Just a thing she was, it was a passion project at first.
Just during the lunch period. That's functional. Just a thing she was – it was a passion project at first.
Just during the lunch period. She was a rhythmic gymnastics autodidact.
She had taught herself the art of rhythmic gymnastics and obtained a rhythmic gymnastics.
So I bet it was a little more raw than the rhythmic gymnastics you would see on TV.
than the rhythmic gymnastics you would see on TV.
It didn't have the slick sheen of the television performances,
but it had a certain authenticity that made it immensely compelling.
Right, sure.
Speaking of... So she was the first one to do rhythmic gymnastics at CBGB, right?
Yes, absolutely.
Back before it was just a T-shirt logo.
It's just a fucking airport restaurant now, man.
Fuck.
Fuck.
I want to kill myself.
I already did.
Whoa.
This is my ghost.
Whoa.
Hey, guess what?
What?
Jordan and Jesse Go is coming to San Francisco Sketch Fest.
Yeah.
We just announced this.
We're going to do San Francisco Sketch Fest January 15th at the Punchline, which is one
of our favorite clubs.
8 o'clock, we're going to have special guests.
We're going to have music.
It's going to be a good old time.
You can get your tickets at sfsketchfest.com.
You can also buy Judge John Hodgman tickets.
It's going to be a good old time as well.
I always love going to San Francisco Sketch Fest.
Used to work there.
It's the most fun.
That's where Todd Berry once spent 20 minutes complaining about my car to me.
Sure, so come relive that
magic. It's a death trap, man.
That's what he said.
Good Todd Berry impression. This car's a death
trap. Was it, though?
Yes. Okay, well.
It was a 65 Dart, no shoulder belt.
Oh, boy. Yeah, drum brakes.
Yeah, definitely a death trap. He made it out
alive. Yeah, he did. And so did you. Oh, wait, no, drum breaks. Yeah, definitely a death trap. He made it out alive. Yeah, he did.
And so did you.
Oh, wait, no, maybe you're a ghost.
Yeah, I died after I dropped him off at that party I was driving him to.
I thought you had killed yourself because you were so depressed about CBGBs.
No, no, no, no, completely unrelated.
I actually first visited CBGBs after that in my spectral form.
Cool.
Yeah.
Did you get the T-shirt?
Yeah, absolutely. You got to get the T-shirt yeah absolutely fell right through me of course
that was a disappointment but at least i had enough real money to pay for it that's most
ghosts don't have real money sierra i mean i i would know this all makes perfect sense if you're
looking for a place to spend your real money uh there's a sale in the Put This On Shop for your
Thanksgivings and Black Fridays
and Cyber Mondays and Small Business
Tuesdays. It's 40%
off all our pocket squares and 20%
off everything else.
You can use the codes SQUARE
JJGO for pocket square orders
and HOLIDAY JJGO
for everything else
orders. That's at Putthisonshop.com.
We also have some new t-shirts in the Max Fun Store.
That's true.
These things are sweet.
You know, I bought one of them.
Yeah.
We don't get them for free.
We sure don't, yes.
I own the company.
When people ask me if I could hook them up with a free Jordan Jesse Go t-shirt,
I say it's rude of you to ask.
Yes, number one.
And then two, I couldn't help you even if you were a polite person because all the t-shirts
are made off-site and shipped from whatever this other site is.
Yeah.
Some place I don't want anything to do with.
Yeah.
Who knows what's going on there.
Yeah, probably something shifty.
Probably something shifty.
So yes, but yeah, these something shifty. Probably something shifty. So, yes. But, yeah, these are handsome shirts.
There is a Prank Bear t-shirt and a Bart Simpson Always Has Table t-shirt.
Yeah.
Of course, Jordan Jesse Go listeners know what that is.
But, Sierra, Prank Bear is a bear who comes in the autumn, plays a prank on you, then double flips you off and goes, see you in the spring, asshole.
flips you off and goes, see you in the spring, asshole.
And, of course, Bart Simpson always has table is what my son said to me because he was trying to figure out what a skateboard was.
That's good.
Just a picture of a skateboard and says table underneath it.
So, yeah, you could see how these things on T-shirts would make perfect sense.
Yeah, love it.
Got to have it, but can't be hooked up with it.
My only disappointment is that people won't have
time to wear them to their Thanksgiving dinners
with their families, but I think
you could get it there in time for Christmas.
Oh yeah, confuse your family at Christmas.
Round the Menorah.
Absolutely.
Office holiday party. That's a good place to confuse
people. Kwanzaa. Sure.
It's an example of collective enterprise. Confuse people there. That's one to confuse people. Kwanzaa. Sure. It's an example of collective enterprise.
Confuse people there. That's one of the nights of
Kwanzaa, I think, if I remember correctly.
MaxFunStore.com
to get all your
Jordan, Jesse, Go!
and other MaxFunShow merchandise.
A lot of cool stuff up there at MaxFunStore.com.
So much cool MaxFunStore stuff.
Actually, John Hodgman, my co-host on Judge
John Hodgman, there is this type of
Canadian generic groceries
called No Name Brand
that has distinctive yellow packaging
and Helvetica type on it
that just says,
like if you buy corned beef,
it's just a bright yellow can
that just says corned beef
and Helvetica on it.
They're very amazing.
Sold at grocery stores in Canada.
And John Hodgman, because he got so obsessed with these things,
made friends with the people who work at the corporation
that owns this generic food product
and got them to license us the design
so that we could make a Judge John Hodgman T-shirt
in this universally recognized aesthetic.
MaxFunStore.com for all your deep cuts.
Yeah, we'll be back.
No album tracks.
Oh, shit.
And Jordan, if anybody's in the Southern California area,
we're having an in-person Put This On Shop sale on December 15th.
So go to Putthison.com.
You can find the details there.
It's going to be at the 2B headquarters
of Maximum Fun,
which is currently just an empty brick building.
So if you're in LA,
come stop by on December 15th
for all kinds of gift items and records
and all kinds of cool stuff.
Okay, we'll be back in just a minute
on Jordan Jesse Go.
Love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, cool stuff. Okay, we'll be back in just a minute on Jordan, Jesse, go.
It's Jordan, Jesse, go. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy
detective. Siricato, unfunctional ribbon girl'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective.
Sarah Cotto, unfunctional ribbon girl.
Sticking with that.
Stick with that.
Look, I think beauty is a function.
It's true.
Sierra.
Can be.
I think this is a spectacular ribbon.
You should be proud of your ribbon.
I know.
I'm shaming the ribbon like I did poor Jordan drinking the milk.
I feel bad. So when you get home, just dunk that ribbon in some 2%.
Yeah.
And then it'll all be right.
That's good.
And then squeeze it into your mouth and think about how –
This is really upsetting.
Yeah, you're right.
Milk and clothing?
Gross.
Actually, I'm going to start filming you real quick.
Okay, but make sure you add a cute animated character.
I know how to make a deep fake, Jordan.
Okay, sorry.
I didn't mean to imply that you didn't know how to deep fake.
When something momentous happens to one of our listeners, we ask them to call us at 206-984-4FUN.
That's 206-984-4FUN.
Or just send us a voice memo at jjgoe at maximumfund.org for our segment,
Momentous Occasions. Let's find out what momentous things have happened to our listeners this week.
Jordan and Jesse and Sonny D and guest, this is Steve from Pennsylvania.
After basically a decade of dealing with major depression and being on dozens of different
antidepressants and none of
them really doing what I wanted them to, I finally got my insurance to approve TMS therapy,
transcranial magnetic stimulation. So now every day for the next six weeks, I go sit in a chair
and I get magnets shot into my brain to try to make me less depressed.
And I just finished up my first week of treatment.
I have four more weeks to go, and then hopefully after that,
I'll be back to, you know, the way I felt 10 years ago.
So it's pretty exciting, and it feels like a pretty momentous occasion.
So I just wanted to call and let you guys know,
and also thank
you for helping getting me through some of the worst parts of uh all that time with your uh
hilarious gags and love you too nick offerman yes and i wouldn't call what we do gags but i don't
know whatever it seems like uh no it's very sweet. Yeah, congratulations on trying new things to get help.
I think it's so easy when you're having a bad time and something doesn't work to just say fuck it.
And yeah, it seems like this guy's really doing the work to get healthy, which is great.
I've got a headband that electrocutes my head.
Really?
This is for migraines?
Yeah, this is for migraines.
It's called a cephaly.
Okay.
It is, I bought it from a Canadian Costco.
Now what's their wine guy like?
It's actually Graham Clark from Stop Podcasting Yourself.
Oh.
Doing double duty.
I had it sent actually to Dave Shumka from Stop Podcasting Yourself, and he was kind enough to send it to me.
And it is like – it looks like Geordie LaForge headband.
And I put it on – it's a little helpful to me but not super helpful.
But it like stimulates the occipital nerve, which is the one that like runs from your nose up into your brain.
nerve, which is the one that runs from your nose up into your brain.
And it goes on the center of your forehead, like where you would put a bindi or something.
And it truly makes me look like an insane person.
I mostly use it on airplanes.
Airplanes are a big. But sometimes at the theater.
Yeah, exactly.
And like every time I put it on, I feel like I'm trying to do the math on how many nearby people I need to explain that it's a medical device.
Oh, right.
Like I'm like, well, definitely this person sitting directly next to me has to get a heads up.
What about this?
What about this flight attendant? Should has to get a heads up what about this uh what about this flight
attendant should this person get a heads up because i feel like every time i put it on there are two
ex-college football players in the back uh hunching together and talking about how they're
gonna bum rush me sure take me down it does from the description oh sorry go ahead oh i'm just like
what do they think it is some Some sort of something. Sure.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Something dangerous.
Maybe not a normal or appropriate thing.
Yeah.
Maybe not.
They're not less worried about the thing itself and more worried about the kind of person who wears it.
Like you might be a supervillain.
Yes.
It has a super the way you describe it as a supervillain.
Sure.
Aspect to it.
It has a super villainy, sure, aspect to it.
But, I mean, if it's like the headpiece that Magneto wears, it's just to make sure that people can't read your mind.
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Who wants that?
A little privacy on a plane.
Who wants that?
Privacy.
I know I keep getting advertised but have never used this thing that, like, you can put on your stomach and it's supposed to get rid of your cramps.
Really?
Oh, wow.
Like, right away. They're like, oh, why even bother taking a painkiller because it'll do it instantaneously
instead of like you waiting around.
But I don't know.
Who knows if it works.
It looks like the future.
Does this go under the clothes?
I think so.
Probably just like right on your skin, like two little node things.
I'll tell you, Sierra, I used one of these.
It was advertised to me on Insta. I used one of these
and I have not had a menstrual
cramp since. Wow
Testimonial. Had you had them
before though? No, I don't menstruate
Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Well, you
know, I think that's a
cool
specific case. Yeah. You know, they gotta test
everybody. You gotta test everybody
Otherwise, are you really doing it? Thank you. I put it on my butt too specific case. Yeah. You know, they got to test everybody. You got to test everybody.
Otherwise, are you really doing it?
Thank you.
I put it on my butt too.
It's just good science. I should mention I put it on my butt.
Yeah, well, you know, you never know where they're going to pop up.
Yes, that's true.
That's true.
You're being, and thank you, you're being very positive about this.
Right, right, right.
I mean, listen, we all experience life differently.
My, back to my milk drinking.
Yeah.
Okay.
My milk drinking became a kind of a
recent habit yes of mine it came kind of in conjunction with like dealing with a tough time
i think like this guy like our caller was talking about um you know i had i had a little i had a
had a rough patch and was kind of worried about money and kind of all this other stuff.
And I'm like, well, you're going through a rough patch.
What do you do?
And I'm like, hey, Jordan, sometimes you deal with this by drinking.
Maybe don't do that and see how things shake out.
Is it better?
Is it worse?
What's this going to do?
But then there was this other kind of stuff.
I'm like, OK, well, but I would like to do a self-carry type thing something i
enjoy you know have something to look forward to um and that thing became whenever i would go to
the grocery store i would go to the bakery and get one of the slices of cake they have for two dollars
uh-huh just stick her in the fridge maybe i would eat it that night. Maybe I would save it. But I had this $2 cake that became like the thing that always like blew my mind. And I think I was looking forward to. And I started having that, you know, kind of at the end of the night with a glass of milk. And it's kind of made its way into my into my kind of diet when I'm having a little something sweet. I want that savory milk.
So what you're saying is we made fun of you for the one salvation you had.
For my self-care.
Beautiful.
Thank you.
Even better.
Yes.
Well, that's beautiful.
Anyway.
I do like that.
But I was telling that to a friend recently, this kind of cake thing about like, oh, you
know, something I really like doing, something that's always fun,
not a big expense.
I was like, hey,
I go to the grocery store and you go to the bakery
and they'll slice off a piece of the cake there
for two bucks. My friend's like, wow.
You know, that's really
sad.
Just right in
my face. Just right
in my face. And telling it out out loud it did seem a little bit sad
but um i don't know i mean i like that you know you found something very accessible sure and then
i like to get a little roll cake what's the roll um a little roll cake uh swedish roll cake i find
it in i find it at the japanese market in little tokyo Anytime I'm there, I'll pop that in the little basket.
And then you put that in the fridge and you can have that whenever.
It's like green tea, so it's not like so, so sweet.
Oh, yeah.
Sure.
And I'll have it with green tea.
So you double up that green tea.
And to get those antioxidants.
Yeah.
But also with the milk, though.
Yeah.
You're getting your calcium.
Strong bones.
See, I'm really trying to make up for all this bullying.
You're getting your calcium strong bones see i'm really trying to make up for all this you're getting your calcium i come from a real thin bone little little tiny little bone little asian women family so we gotta take our calcium pills oh sure but if i're drinking
milk more i wouldn't have to do that that terrible routine and pop in a big old calcium pill in my
mouth and also maybe something you also didn't know going into that was my mom says I'm going to hit my growth spurt any day now.
Well, some are lucky, I guess.
And then maybe the girls will start noticing me.
Bit of a show off.
Let's take another call.
Hi, Jordan, Jesse, and guests.
I'm calling in with a momentous occasion.
So I'm a medical student, and I recently finished my clinical year.
And it was a super long and
exhausting year and I finished on my surgery rotation which was also very exhausting but
in the last week of my rotation I hit like the high point of my medical career so far
because one of the surgeons let me sew a dude's scrotum back together
all by myself.
I did a beautiful job.
The scrotum still looked like a scrotum when I was done.
God, I'd love to sew a scrotum.
I decided I want to be a surgeon.
Yeah, well, just go back to med school.
Maybe I just do more years of study.
Yeah.
I mean, and that's good.
I mean, because I think, you know, she took, I mean, it's clear that she's a fan because, I mean, what do we say on this show constantly?
Don't neglect the balls.
Especially if they've experienced trauma.
Yes.
So, you know, it's good to know that people are out there listening because I don't think we do this.
I mean, I'm speaking for you, Jesse, and let me know if I'm wrong.
We don't do this show to entertain but to educate yeah i'm a sierra you don't know this
about me you work with jordan so you know a lot about jordan but just so you know i'm a really
big fan of uh the love of lifelong learning right um so i'm really committed to whatever it may be, going to the writer's annex. Sure.
Taking a community college pottery course.
Reading a book out loud at the farmer's market.
Sure.
To anyone who will listen.
Yeah, yeah.
And of course, let's not forget-
Outdoor classroom.
The great courses.
Yes.
I can't get enough of the great courses. Hell,
I finished the great courses.
I'm on the very good courses now.
Wow.
Congratulations.
I mean, just hunker down
before you get to those bad courses.
How to eat change?
Okay, I guess I'll listen to this.
It's kind of a bad course uh yeah i mean i bet when you
i wonder if the scrote when sewed up i wonder if it loses sensitivity well i think they cut open my
scrote to give me a vasectomy i think it's either It's either immediately below the scrote or on the scrote.
I can't quite remember.
And
yeah, like my balls are
extraordinarily fast.
Oh, cool.
Yeah. Speaking from experience.
Sure. Well,
more so? Yeah.
They don't, unlike
this scrote, though, they no longer look like a scrote.
Now, they look a little bit like a volleyball.
Oh, interesting.
Yeah, sure.
But, I mean, what is – I had a –
What is the male scrote but a Rorschach test?
You're seeing what you want.
Yeah, right, right.
You're going to project your, you know, idea of the scrote.
Also, when I look at it, I see my dad being disappointed in me.
I mean, it's tough.
My surgeon was named Wilson, and he always signs his work.
Well, that's probably.
Big fan.
Probably it.
Okay.
Yeah, Wilson's great.
If you have a momentous occasion for us, 206-984-4FUN or jjgoatmaximumfun.org.
Jesse, can I give our listeners a special assignment?
Yeah, I would love this.
Because, I mean, I know our listeners.
An action item if we will.
I know our listeners.
They're a homeworky bunch.
Yeah.
We're going to have some special holiday-themed guests coming up.
And we wanted to – I think we would call them holiday experts.
So, you know. We've got Dasher, Dancer, Donner, Blitzen. We wanted to, I think we would call them holiday experts.
So, you know.
We've got Dasher, Dancer, Donner.
Sure, yeah.
And if you'll recall, the most famous guest of all, Chris Fairbanks.
Oh, okay.
Yeah, anyway, I kind of abandoned the tune of Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer. I wish I had kept it going.
It's a tough one.
It's, you know.
Anyway.
Someone re-record that.
What were we going to say?
Oh, so we have some special holiday experts coming up on the show.
So if you have any holiday conundrums, holiday issues, maybe some stress around going home, dealing with family, presents, that sort of thing, give us a call.
We're going to be answering special holiday-themed questions with holiday experts.
So 206-984-4FUN.
Yeah, that sounds awesome.
I'm pumped about that.
You can post them on Reddit if you want to, but you can also give us a call.
Can I prime the pump with a
holiday question of my own? Sure. Yeah, what do you got?
You know those silver balls that are on
holiday cookies sometimes? Enough about your
surgery!
Sorry. You know those little silver
balls? You know the kind of silver balls I'm talking about.
Where are they at? They're on
a holiday cookie. Where are those balls?
Holiday cookie? They're on a holiday cookie. Oh, yeah, sure.
They're on a silver fox, like a handsome guy, like that guy from Mad Men.
John Slattery?
Yeah, John Slattery.
Right.
No, they're on a holiday cookie.
You know, they're like a little silver, shiny silver ball.
What are those and can you eat them?
I don't know if I've ever seen that.
Don't know and no.
Okay.
Well, we'll be back.
Definitely don't eat that. Oh, no.
You can know. Those are good. You can nom those all day
long. I like to eat handfuls of them
at the farmer's market. Those are BBs,
Jordan. Yeah.
I know. You can spit them back
out. And then afterwards, it's a
little scavenger hunt in the toilet.
We'll be
back in just a second on Jordan, Jessica.
This week on Bullseye, Lin-Manuel Miranda on his dark materials, hip hop and life after
Hamilton.
I know it's the first line of my obituary.
So if that line is handled, then what else can I do with my time here?
It's Bullseye for MaximumFun.org and NPR.
Hey, it's Jesse Thorne.
Hey, it's Jesse Thorne.
We're very happy to announce that tickets for MaxFunCon 2020 will go on sale Friday, November 29th at 11 a.m. Pacific.
I also want to let you know this coming year, MaxFunCon 2020 will be our last MaxFunCon for the foreseeable future. For 2020 and beyond, we're going to be looking for ways
to connect with more of you in person
and spread the spirit of MaxFun
farther than it's ever gone before.
In the meantime,
if you want to join us
at the last MaxFunCon in Lake Arrowhead,
June 12th through the 14th,
you can find details at maxfunCon.com.
It's Jordan, Jesse Goh.
I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart.
Jordan Morse, boy detective.
And Sierra Cotto.
I'm going to say functional, Ruben girl.
Yeah.
We've evolved.
Wow.
We've grown a lot. We've grown a lot.
We've learned a lot.
And you know what?
You have grown a lot to the point where I think that it's not the ribbon who's functional.
It's you, Sierra.
Oh, thank you.
That's very kind.
You're really adding a lot to this great nation and to your community.
Yeah.
Wow.
Thank you.
I needed that.
Sierra, you're a stand-up comic as well as a comedy writer.
Where can people see you perform stand-up comedy or follow your working career?
Yeah. I mean, I post my stand-up dates on my website, SierraCotto.com, and my Instagram at SierraCotto, S-I-E-R-R-A-K-A-T-O-W.
And then, yeah, I'll just, you know,
I run a show in Koreatown that may be ending,
so maybe it won't happen anymore.
But if it is, it'll be there,
and you can look up the details.
Yeah, that's most of the stuff.
I think a lot of our listeners would love to follow you
on Instagram at Sierra Cotto
if you promise to further humiliate Jordan.
Oh, yeah.
The content will be flowing.
You know, lots of little milk gifs, lots of deep fakes.
Mm-hmm.
So, yeah.
We could talk about our show.
People could get excited about our show, I guess, if they wanted to.
Yeah, it's a thing.
Yeah.
It's been announced.
Sierra and I are writing for a show that's coming up called Earth to Ned.
It's from the Jim Henson
company. It's going to be on the Disney+.
Yes.
It's about an alien who
traps celebrities in a tractor beam and
forces them to be on his talk show.
I saw our friend and past Jordan
Jesse Go guest Eliza Skinner post a
picture on Twitter of herself
in a puppet control
area with puppet switches and a puppet microphone
and all kinds of cool stuff.
Very cool.
And I replied to her tweet, cool.
And then I got really worried that she would think I was being sarcastic when I actually
just meant it literally.
And I had to reply to my own reply.
Just so you know, I mean this sincerely.
I actually do think it's really cool.
You should have added an exclamation point.
Did you have an exclamation point?
Yeah, I put two.
Is that good?
I think one is good, too.
Wait, sorry.
I put an interrobang now that I think about it.
Well, there you go.
Like I was incredulous.
Cool.
Yeah, Eliza's the head writer and co-EP
yeah there's gonna be a lot of
I think there's a lot of MaxFun adjacent
to participation you'll find so
yeah if you don't already have
those Disney Plus subscriptions
scoop them up
scoop those subscripts
baby Yoda won't be there forever
you know that's true baby Yoda will
be dying.
You gotta move on.
They've shown us.
That's the top secret stuff we got.
We can't say.
Yeah.
As employees, they have shown us every episode of The Mandalorian.
Yeah.
Baby Yoda does get ripped from limb by a rancor.
Wow.
Yeah, but we got pieces of it, so.
Yes, they gave us his.
This is really cool.
They did give us his pieces.
Where does grown-up Yoda come from? A graft? Yes, they gave us his. This is really cool. They did give us his pieces. Where does grown-up Yoda come from?
A graft?
Yes, exactly.
Yeah, it's like when you cut a starfish up.
Every piece grows a little Yoda.
Oh, they're good.
So listen, before we go.
Our show's far cuter than Baby Yoda.
Everything on our show, far cuter than Baby Yoda.
Before we go, I want to say one thing, and I apologize in advance because it's a little bit of a sad thing.
But last weekend, I got a call from my childhood best friend, Peter Fraunfelder.
And he said to me, did you hear about Evan?
And Evan was a friend of mine since I was two years old.
We went to preschool and elementary school and high school together.
His parents were like extra parents for me.
And I said no.
And he said, Evan died.
And he died of an overdose.
And I didn't know he was using.
And it was a real gut punch.
It's, I mean, I hope everyone knows.
I'll be okay. Um, uh, but it's, it's a,
it's something where it's, it's, uh, been really difficult for the whole community of people that,
um, I grew up with and went to school with and, um, uh, my family and obviously Evan's family and Evan's parents.
And Evan was a really special guy, a brilliantly talented artist.
He did visual art at School of the Arts where I went to high school.
He was a very gifted comics artist and a very gifted fine artist.
He was a very accomplished graffiti writer. I was just talking to his mom and she told me that
somebody called her the other day because they saw a piece he did. His graffiti name was Spesh.
And they saw a piece he did in Brooklynoklyn 3 000 miles from where he lived
but he was up everywhere and also a really uh a really gifted artist um and he was just you know
he was the guy we used to hang out at his parents house and listen to weird al tapes and um
uh and in his passing i've talked to a lot of talked to a lot of people online in real life
and he just – he added so much joy and happiness to so many different people's lives
by just being that guy that everyone liked and wanted to hang out with.
being that guy that everyone liked and wanted to hang out with.
So it's really horrifically sad that he passed away.
But I have another friend who also went to preschool with us and went to high school with us.
And he was like, we should do something for Evan. So I talked to Bucky Sinister, who's a past guest on this show.
And Bucky is in recovery from heroin addiction and has worked in recovery for many years in the Bay Area.
Wrote a great AA, NA book. And I asked him who was like the creme de la creme of organizations working with
addicts and in recovery in the Bay Area. And he up and down recommended a group called the
Homeless Youth Alliance who work with young people in San Francisco who are living on the streets
and meet them where they are, no matter where that might be, including addiction, but all other kinds of assistance as well.
And I called them up and I talked to the Homeless Youth Alliance in Evan's name.
I was like, I want to do it so that it feels like we're really doing something.
So we're going to donate $5,000 to them in Evan's name.
And I hope that you Jordan Jesse Go listeners might consider joining me and making a donation of really any amount.
If you go to MaximumFun.org slash Evan, E-V-A-N, we just, you know, there's a picture of the two of us in goofing and goofing around together when we were 15 and a link to where you can donate.
And if you just follow the link and type in that it's in Evan's memory,
it would mean a lot.
I talked to Evan's parents about this and everything.
So, yeah, he was just a really special guy.
And he means a lot to me.
And it's something that can really –
it's something that could have happened to any one of us
or to any one of our friends or family members,
a horrible tragedy.
But also, like, I would like to have something positive come out of it.
And I also, in doing something in his honor,
And I also, in doing something in his honor, I have been remembering all the light that he brought to my life and hearing about all the light that he brought to the lives of others.
And I don't think – I think he lived a very full life and left the world a lot better than when he got there.
So, yeah.
So I hope that you'll go to Maxim help people get their lives together and on track while they're young and their lives are ahead of them.
So MaximumFund.org slash Evan, and that's it.
Sorry to be sad, but I hope everybody will throw a few bucks that way.
It'll make everybody – it'll help people and I think it'll make a big difference for his family.
And I know I'll be really grateful for everybody who does that.
So thank you for that.
Sorry, guys.
Sorry to bring down the mood.
Brian Sonny DeFernandez is our producer.
You can find us on Reddit, MaximumFun.reddit.com.
You can find us on Twitter at Jesse Thorne at Jordan underscore Morris.
Hashtag your tweets.
Hashtag JJGo.
And we love you all very much. We'll talk to you next time on Jordan Essigel.
go and we love you all very much we'll talk to you next time on jordan dissey go maximumfund.org comedy and culture artist owned audience supported