Jordan, Jesse, GO! - Ep. 728: Social Link Achieved with Michael Rianda
Episode Date: March 7, 2022Michael Rianda (The Mitchells vs. The Machines) joins Jordan and Jesse for a discussion of the JJGo catchphrase that Michael almost got into a movie, what happened to Michael when he got nominated for... an Oscar, and the powerful eBay feedback Jesse ran across trying to buy his daughter a PSP.Watch The Michells vs The Machines on Netflix!! And for God's sake if you are Lupita Nyong'o please vote for Michael up and down your Oscar ballot!
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Give a little time for the child within you, don't be afraid to be young and free.
Unto the locks and throw away the keys and take off your shoes and socks and run you.
It's Jordan, Jesse Goh, I'm Jesse Thorne, America's Radio Sweetheart.
Jordan Morris, boy detective.
How you doing, buddy?
I'm doing good, and I wanted to maybe do a little something new up top, something kind of fresh.
Wow.
Something new and fresh, huh?
Yeah.
I thought, you know, year 14 is really the year to-
Try a thing?
Throw a-
I was going to say throw a wrench into the gears.
But yeah, I mean-
Jordan, we've been doing this show this long without trying anything.
Why would we start now?
You know, I'm just so, I've just been inspired and, you know, I'm about to turn 40 and I'm like, let's try.
Let's just try and see how it feels.
It could feel shitty, you know, but at least i'll know that you know i remember
that feeling i was 39 once too and i was i found myself thinking what is 40 and then jed apatow
made that movie to explain it to you right you're like oh yeah it's a little phil hendry cameo that's
yeah that's what i was about to say you like that movie remember when phil henry was in it um anyway
but so back to trying i thought you know i thought i'm kind of like looking at the podcast
landscape and like what do people like you know right and true crime true crime uh i don't have
any of that for you okay um false crime again nothing yeah not even but what i i have some i have some pop culture analysis oh my
gosh this is perfect i'm a pop culture addict okay i'm addicted to pop culture can i tell you
who's the most successful podcasters we know glenn weldon and linda holmes hands down right yeah what
what are they doing they're talking about their addiction to
popular culture exactly oh they love to film novel uh i don't know zoetrope other yeah
going down to the nickelodeon i actually yeah um yeah, the circus, a freak show that just has a monkey sewn to a fish and they tell you it's a mermaid.
Pop culture.
I'm an addict.
I gobble this stuff up.
This guy loves it.
Let's head down to the Midway and consume some pop culture.
Love it. Let's head down to the Midway and consume some pop culture. Love it.
So, yeah.
So I actually watched I watched a pretty fascinating episode of, you know, of a kind of a buzzy streaming TV show.
Oh, my God.
This is perfect.
People love to talk about the buzz.
We're basically Sam Sanders now.
So do you have a review of the show that you watched yeah i i thought i would
kind of just like describe it and you know and just kind of get into the weeds and okay see what
you think and offer some you know inside and i mean that sounds great just get into it just say
get into it because i'm addicted to this stuff i'm addicted i can't stop. Maybe you should go to PCA, Pop Culture Anonymous.
Boy, I go to a drying out facility with no pop culture.
Go to a nice methadone clinic, but for pop culture, not heroin.
Right.
So here's, I just wanted to talk about.
So it's so funny.
So this was just a great episode.
So the hero of this popular Netflix fantasy show, right?
He replaced a drinking vessel and made a rude gesture to a clergyman while he was paying a gratuity to an exotic dancer, right?
What he didn't know.
I guess I don't feel like I know what show you're talking about.
Let me, because sometimes these things start kind of obtuse, and then they reveal themselves.
Okay.
Is that something you learned from Glenn, or did Weldon teach you that?
No, I learned about queer subtext in Batman from Glenn.
Equally important.
Both are important.
The rise of fan culture and its meaning.
So here, what this guy didn't know was that she was providing information
to a famous British serial killer
who had a different receptacle
for his bow and arrow
than the ones belonging to Ronald Reagan,
a famous dolphin,
and the host of an HBO horror anthology
whose name was one letter off.
Okay?
Okay.
So this is on Netflix?
Things got really crazy when this old hbo horror anthology host whose name was one letter off had an alcoholic drink
with a famous nicholas cage character and a kid's youtube host all right so the funny thing
the funny thing about this kid's youtube host was that he was using the latch on his pants to perform a deception
and he couldn't get them on okay to perform a deception so just in just to so to sum it all up
the latch on his pants so to sum it all up what happened was yeah the titular witcher switches
the pitcher and flips off the vicar while tipping the stripper who tipped off the ripper whose quiver did differ from the gipper and flipper and old man crypt kipper who quickly sipped liquor with a man made of wicker and blippy.
Go figure.
He was playing a trick with a particular zipper and he cinched and he cinched, but his pants were too tight.
Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night.
For fuck's sake, Jordan.
We have an Oscar nominee on the show this week.
The fucking movie Oscars, dude.
Yeah.
I'm just trying to waste as much of their time as possible.
Well, congratulations.
We're a winner, asis mayfield once saying holy shit anyway the show we're just the show's just saying stuff so i just thought
fun to just say some stuff jordan 25 years we've been doing this show
25 years we've just been saying shit right we were performing it on a boardwalk with we were
opening for a mentalist at no point did we just say a bunch of words that were well now we do now
we do and it's a new thing and people are going to start demanding it is this some of those were
slant rhymes.
Is Peter Sagal going to get mad at us because we're doing limericks from the news?
I don't fucking care.
Bring it on.
Holy shit.
You're picking a fight with Sagal?
I don't care. Do you know how fit that guy is?
No.
He has a column in Runner's World.
Sure.
Well, I fight dirty so you think do you seriously think sagal's not going
for your nuts well i'll go i'll sagal fights like a chimp is what you're saying
he destroys the face and genitals
okay now i don't want to get now i'm sorry'm sorry. I'm sorry about the limerick, Segal.
Please don't rip off
my face and genitals like an
adolescent chimp. Yeah.
Pulls up on his motorcycle from his television
show about the Constitution.
Fucking does one of those power
slides and slides right through your legs
while ripping off your genitals. You know, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry about the rhyming
words. I'm sorry the slant rhymes. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done it. I shouldn't have done it. I'm sorry. You don't the i'm sorry about the the rhyming words and sorry
the slant rhymes i'm sorry i shouldn't have done it i shouldn't have done it i'm sorry
you don't have to tell me i was there i'm sorry i heard i apologize uh i'm i'm learning i'm learning
on the show i'm learning i'm growing and nominated for an oscar and now i'm just gonna take the time to reflect and listen do you know what jordan do
you know what do you know what word i apologize for a metro santa cruz goldie award yeah that's
the top local local in over 38 years of podcasting local os. The best award we've won is a printout with a picture of a golden surfboard on it.
A printout, Jordan.
Just out of a laser printer.
Oh, they actually gave me that golden surfboard.
I've had it melted down.
God damn it.
Yeah.
And I used, I had, Jesse, I had to, I had to use it to buy pop culture, which I'm addicted to.
I had to buy DVDs, phonographs, play tickets.
Our guest on the program is running a reverse Oscar campaign by appearing on our show.
Oscar campaign by appearing on our show.
He's the director of the wonderful animated film,
Mitchell's versus the machines.
He's much more successful than us and shouldn't be on this show.
I mean,
granted all our guests are more successful than he really takes the cake.
Michael Rionda.
Hi,
Mike.
How are you? Hi, i promised not to rip off your
face and genitals that's the rionda promise i wish i could believe you i wish i could believe you
i i will also say um i'm revealing too much but um i have had that in my head like quote unquote
rip off their face and genitals like monkeys rip off people's face.
And I think I got it from you.
And I forgot that I got it from you.
And I put it in the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie.
It's about to come out.
Wait, what?
For some reason, they cut it out.
It was wild.
So this is quite a journey you took us on just now.
I'm really tanking the whole credibility with the very nice intro you did.
But the good news, Jordan, is that Bebop and Rocksteady are now called Chip Dipson and Dip Dobson.
I did slip in Chip Dipson and Dip Dobs Thompson on a previous script, and they were removed.
Jordan, Jesse, go.
Colon, on the cutting room floor.
Wait, so you worked on a new Ninja Turtles movie that's coming out?
Is that?
Yeah, very briefly.
And I don't even think it's official but i'm breaking it now baby yeah
break the nda and i will say um at one point the character rat king said um yeah let's have the
monkeys rip off their face for some reason the director got it i don't understand fool a fool
was that before you got nominated for the oscar can you make a powerful and get it back in there and the director cut it. I don't understand. Fool. A fool.
Was that before you got nominated for the Oscar?
Can you make a powerful and get it back in there?
I gotta do it.
I gotta go back in.
Especially if I win, I'll slam it on the table and I'll be like, let's do some rewrites.
Just pick up the red phone that connects you directly
with your agent and be like,
hey, hey, agent, get me Rat King.
agent be like hey hey agent get me rat king agent's name is agent right yeah exactly john john agent uh michael what happens when you get nominated for an oscar like did
does glenn close call you yeah it's weird glenn called um you know lapita nyong'o came to my
house wow gave me a kiss on the cheek and said you are now one of us um no uh it was it was really
it was really wonderful i mean it's like i you know i'm a you know nerd maniac who just should
not be getting any oscars um so I watched, I was watching it with my family
and we were all like having a party.
And, but I'm also an idiot.
So I lost my cell phone that day.
So like all these people were calling me
and I was like, I don't know.
And then I got a new cell phone
and then it was just a bunch of numbers I didn't recognize.
And I was like, who is this? Who is this? And then I, this is Lupita Nyong'o.
Which one is your house? I have to get you. And it was also very on brand because, um, uh, I was at my parents' house in this like rural area. And there was literally a woodpecker who took out the wi-fi cable so i couldn't contact
anyone and then i had to do all of the press in the back of my dad's pickup outside of a starbucks
where i was you were stealing their wi-fi uh i we bought some coffees i'm sorry i said stealing i'm
sorry i said stealing it was uh it I said stealing. It was great.
And honestly, the thing that was most, because it was really nice.
I mean, you know, people called and they interviewed us and a lot of, but the biggest deal to me for some reason was the local news station, KSBW8.
We're like, would you like to be on the news and i was like on ksbw eight with dan green
um and uh they're like dan green is busy but um we'll interview you you got big timed by green
huh i got way big time by green but um wait so is this this is where like in the town you grew up in
yeah and i actually i grew up in salinas, California, very close to your Santa Cruz.
I know all about the golden surfboard.
I've seen it in the window of the red room or whatever.
Nice.
Nice Santa Cruz dive bar pole.
I was trying to find something.
That's it.
Um,
good.
And,
uh,
and yeah,
no.
And,
and I,
I grew up in Salinas and it was,
um,
it was like a really awesome town to grow up in,
but yeah. And I, I sort of went back there to do all that it was like a really awesome town to grow up in. But yeah.
And I, I sort of went back there to do all that Oscar stuff and then I lost my phone
and I went back to the website.
So, so, um, here I am.
Uh, no.
And, and I've, I've, I've listened to you guys for 10 years.
Um, and I've like, I, I have such warm memories, like, like finding this podcast and then mainlining like 120 episodes, whatever was out at the time, just like doing fat lines of D.C.
Pearson and Mary Roach legends.
You have to look out because sometimes sometimes Mary Roach is actually cut with a little fentanyl.
I've got some strips.
Yeah, you test it. You have to test the mary roach yeah yeah you gotta test them you can get it from a lot of anarchist bookstores a little
vowel in there so you gotta look out party safe.org right um well congratulations michael i
was telling you this before the show but i'm gonna tell it to you now again for the benefit of our audience.
I have to watch many of the popular children's films of the day because I have children.
And you can't just watch Master and Commander with them.
And so I've seen a number of these films that have come out and as a general rule
i hate them but i really liked yours i didn't even know that means so much i didn't even know
that uh we knew each other or any of you like jordan jesse go or anything i just heard it was
pretty good and then i watched it and i was like man that was great i really enjoyed that uh so that means that means that means the world to me uh because i've heard you
rip so many things to shreds over the years it's uh i can feel i can feel the sincerity
michael i'll tell you what what i didn't like all other children's films ever so
let's get into it except for babe pig in the city hey pig in the city is a classic
i watched this that's not true because last night i watched this movie about uh these japanese
raccoons that have magic testicles and it was great pom poco that shit was tremendous that
shit was fucking hilarious it's so takahata it's one of his uh it's it's honestly
not my favorite one but um you gotta admit that shit's fucking hilarious they got those magic
testicles i love how big and round and bulky their balls i have to agree with you about that
how come there wasn't any fucking balls in your movie michael now that i think about it
great question they did uh just a parable about the
dangers of technology and the value of family they wouldn't let us put any fat bulky nuts
unfortunately this is a this is a theme so not only did the testicles from from
mitchell's get cut but also the testicle line from ninja so yes absolutely dude it's um it's i i feel like i'm being shackled by the man
from uh from from giving kids the ball content that they deserve is this because dreamworks
made all those uh minions movies about human testicles testicles with little pants on it's they are goals and um jesse that's the illumination
please jesse please i beg of you
and it's it's a real shame that that hollywood is ignoring all the best advice and neglecting
the balls i know it's a real tragedy it It's a shame. Totally in the animation space.
In the animation, of course, yes.
In the animation space, yes.
There's a lot of great live action ball play.
Guys, what would you say is your favorite Studio Ghibli movie?
For me, it's got to be Minions 2.
Jesse. be minions too jesse kayao miyazaki's wonderful tale shrek the third yeah it was my personal favorite you i will not do this bit with you guys because i do not want to commit at mention suicide
i refuse like that time i said on this show that i didn't like shrek jesus christ oh man oh the storm of
shit i but you know what i take it back i'm glad someone finally took fairy tales down a notch
okay oh boy i was sick of their bullshit not doing not doing this bit with you glad someone took
okay i have a different i have a different subject do you guys ever bought or sold on ebay the electronic bay absolutely no i have not what do you like to buy and sell on ebay michael
um when i was a kid i would buy animation memorabilia because i'm a huge nerd um i
bought a picture of bob clamp it's original 1946 unit um uh and it was original. So top that. Wow. His unit?
You neglected the ball?
Yeah, his huge unit.
No, it was his team that made his films.
Yeah, I mean, that's pretty good.
Yeah.
Maybe you bought a Mr. T lunchbox at some point.
Yeah, why not?
Why wouldn't you?
Look, we've all gone on eBay and bought a Mr. T lunchbox.
It's just part of.
You know what I bought?
I wish I could turn my computer.
I did.
I bought something on eBay recently,
something like in that zone from my childhood.
I wonder if it's worth turning my computer.
It's like above me.
I don't know that this is,
please.
Okay.
Let's see.
Go ahead.
Yeah.
You can turn your computer around.
Jordan's turning his computer around.
See it.
Oh,
it's just,
it's justice league international.
Yeah.
The 1987 team with Blue Beetle, Booster Gold.
Anyway.
Is this a fold-out from a comic?
It is, yeah.
So it was like something that you would get for free when you bought it.
And I had one as a kid, and my mom threw it away.
Doesn't she know about Keith Geffen?
Thank you, Mom!
She doesn't know about Keith Geffen, doesn't know about jm demadius my mom doesn't even know anything about guy gardener
the rogue lantern your mom's got a brush up on booster gold but jordan you've replaced it and
now you'll never die yeah oh I think you mean never have sex.
For the listeners at home,
there's 14 nude women behind George.
I'm almost done, ladies.
They love to watch me podcast.
I went on eBay
to purchase something for my daughter.
She had saved up to buy a PlayStation Portable.
Whoa, cool. Really?
The top gaming system of 2007 or whatever.
Does she want to watch UMD?
Get her a Vita.
Whoa! Rihanna had a Vita right at arm's length.
That's great.
She does want to watch UMDs.
She's currently arguing for a UMD of the Twilight Zone, which, look, you haven't lived till you've watched the Twilight Zone on a three by two inch screen.
And, hey, if you find any UMDs, why don't you ask George W. Bush where the WMDs are?
Thanks, Jordan.
You hear that, Colin Powell?
We're going to watch the Twilight Zone on a three-inch by two-inch screen.
He's shaking right now.
We're going to watch specifically half of it before the batteries run out.
So I was looking around on eBay, and you guys know about the feedback system on eBay.
I've been an eBay member since 1999.
I've been using eBay longer, obviously, but I've been a member since 1999 with my current account.
I have 1,487 feedback on eBay, 100% positive.
Powerful.
That's the number that you want to hit if you're if you're talking about
ebay feedback you want to hit 100 so i was doing some research on some people who were selling
playstation portables and one of them had a good price on a playstation portable said it would
been tested new battery that's what we were looking Right. But they had like a 96.4% or something like that.
And that is big trouble on the electronic bay.
That is, uh-oh, what's wrong?
Because anything that goes wrong on eBay, to get to the point where someone actually leaves the feedback, something has to have gone badly wrong.
So I went into their feedback to see what
it was. Because sometimes, you know, you never know exactly what it's going to be, but you want
to be able to sort of cross-reference it against what you're buying to decide whether you're taking
a reasonable risk. And I was going to say four or five dollars by using this seller rather than
somebody with a hundred percent. I was serious I was serious. I was all in.
Yeah.
You're a thrifty shopper.
And I found the negative review in the past six months that had been left on
this account.
I thought you guys might be interested in hearing it.
Yes.
Well,
this was item number four,
zero three,
three,
three,
two,
nine,
eight,
three,
six,
eight,
four.
I don't know if you guys remember that item.
I've actually, I've, I six, eight, four. I don't know if you guys remember that item. I've actually,
I've,
I'm writing all this down.
So,
um,
this is,
I'm just reading it.
This is not a bit.
I mean,
it's a bit in the sense that I saved it to read it later,
but this is word for word.
You should make all the words rhyme.
That'll make it better.
It's been done, Jordan.
I only do new stuff.
Okay.
All right.
Okay.
All right.
Here's the feedback that was left there.
And I found it edifying.
I thought you guys might find it edifying if you're looking to buy a PlayStation Portable.
I am.
Ordered two container of nuts.
Large one didn't arrive.
Cellar silent in catbird seat.
Rip off.
God is going to punish this guy.
Whoa.
People don't realize if you rip someone off,
you curse yourself and your loved ones
whoa i lost money he is selling his soul planters mixed nuts with sea salt 56 ounce resealable
canister so oh my god this person who is selling a PSP
is also selling
bulk mixed nuts?
56 ounces.
Does that count as bulk?
What's that? About 4 pounds?
I think that's a big boy
of mixed nuts.
How long would it
take you to eat? I could do that in a week.
It'd probably take me months.
I don't like mixed nuts that much.
You don't like mixed nuts?
You've got to pick around.
Not enough peanuts?
I like to eat mixed nuts until I'm...
So they're there when I'm starving.
Right.
And then I eat enough to be not starving, and then I stop eating them.
You know what a lot of people don't realize?
If you rip someone off, you curse yourself and your loved ones.
That's true. I did hear that in the review.
Yeah, I feel bad for this guy's loved ones. They didn't rip
anybody off and they have to endure God's curses.
When you order nuts, Jordan, how many container do you order?
Well, first of all when i'm order i order container
because i never neglect the nuts we know that jordan i never neglect the nuts yeah um but i
order one or two container jordan when it comes to my nuts i of course have large one and small one
but large one didn't arrive
did you get the psp yeah we order the psp it's coming in the mail jordan it's coming in the mail
i have this question though yeah how does your daughter know to get a psp she saw it in a movie
oh my daughter has a persistent interest in old
technology. And this is
the way you can tell the difference
between old technology
and new technology.
The older technology
doesn't quite work right,
but the stakes are really high
and dad has to fix it.
I remember I was a little like Lord fauntleroy child and i remember
asking my mom for a um super famicom and and like 14 import games right she's like i don't i don't
think santa can handle that you know i don't think he knows the routes to Japan. Yeah. He's not into proxy buyers.
Yeah.
I think he can maybe handle a new NES game.
That's kind of worth that Santa's level.
Yeah.
Santa's got a used Rob the video robot.
Is that anything?
Let Santa know.
I want to play Ranma one half in the original Japanese
Jordan you're exactly
right Ranma one and a half was
I also yeah I've been
version of it oh yeah oh yeah sure
okay top five Ranma's
go three quarters
what do you
got on that Vita there oh dude
Vita it's unbelievable I loved my Vita my Vita got stolen on vita there oh dude vita it's unbelievable um i loved my vita my
vita got stolen on in a break-in that's i i feel so bad because the vita is a wonderful machine i
have not used it in years i will say it's currently dusty but um i played all of persona 4 golden on
it and i i actually played persona 4 golden um if you don't know what that is it's it's sort
of like this like life sim slash rpg where you play the role of a of a gorgeous gray-haired boy
who every girl is in love with for no reason to play the role of that's my life baby
and you um and i actually started playing it when i turned 30 in in a sort of um almost manic state
where i would be playing it for like 20 hours at a time and my then um fiance and now wife was like
should i be concerned and i'm like no no i'm just working stuff out you know i'm just i'm a beautiful
gray-haired boy i'm in love with chie. I don't like Sasuke as much.
I just got to beat this demon.
And she's like, all right, I'm going to give you space.
You don't understand.
The magical raccoons have enormous.
They're on our team.
They can use them to fly.
It's beautiful.
I tried to play one of those persona games because everybody loves them
everybody i know like who who i like to talk about games with loves them and like they're
there's so much like so there's a lot of like demon fighting but there's also like
minutiae there's also like life minutiae so when you're not fighting demons you're just like
doing life stuff and you know i liked the demon fighting but you're just like doing life stuff. And, you know, I liked the demon fighting.
But when it came to the life stuff, I'm like, all right.
And I so I did not play for I think I was playing five.
And you like live in the back of a coffee shop.
You're that your uncle owns.
Does this simulate that sort of like 65 year old poet guy that
used to wander the streets in my neighborhood it got close yeah that's that's the vibe did you
used to know lawrence ferlinghetti this is this is the world of persona 5 okay one quick thing
about it that is amazing is is when you're um when you're
going around the town and you're sort of like talking to chie or asuka or whoever whoever it is
and you ask them a question about their personal life and it's like how's your dad all of a sudden
a sword slash comes across the screen and a choir sings and it's like social link achieved it's like craziest
thing and you're like you're like no um uh you know you look different today are those new glasses
and there's it's it's the wildest thing in the world and um i hope it is training children to
believe that that really happens in real life. I love that.
I love an announcement of achievement in a video game.
I could use more of those in real life.
Nightmare slaying. And Jordan's old pal Nathaniel Chapman, who still works in the video game industry.
He used to be, I used to be his housemate.
And Jordan would come over and they would play burned cds of japanese fighting games on a
dreamcast um and uh hell yeah bro college was fucking rad i mean nathaniel played garu mark
of the wolves nathaniel nathaniel got me playing this super mario game where super mario has a hose
that hoses off walls oh yeah yeah mario sunshine yeah
and then every so often i don't remember what you did to get this but every so often just on the
screen a big thing would say shine get yeah fucking i think about shine gets every day of my life
that was 20 years ago every time like my dog is lying in a pool of light
coming through a window i think oh fuck yeah shine get and then a sun explodes from his
and it gives you power yeah it's a firestorm the nuclear man situation
i'm playing this game and i'm liking the demon fighting but kind of
struggling with the day-to-day minutiae stuff and then you know that my my little you know heads up
display gives me like oh i have a new mission and then i follow the thing to where the mission is
and what it wants me to do is change the coffee shop sign from open to closed and and i was just like i guess fuck this
i guess fuck this and i i yeah i my time is not valuable it's certainly not but also i don't know
i guess fuck this i guess i don't really want to change the sign from open to closed. You just need to be super lonely and be having a crisis, and then you'll love it.
Jordan, have you thought at all about watching some lore videos?
Oh, yeah.
Maybe that would help me get into it more if I just knew more about the Persona lore.
Oh, I just presume that you would want to know specifically more about that sign at the coffee shop.
I know.
Who built the sign if it's
imbued with any magical talismans i do i do watch enjoy watching lord videos though she's so talented
very talented she's so very talented yeah um you guys want to take a little break and watch a lord
video and then come back for some more yeah we'll be back in just a second with Oscar nominee.
By the way, if you're listening to this and you've got Oscar votes, you know who to vote for.
Oh, yeah.
Okay, vote for Rwanda.
In fact, just put him in in all the categories.
Boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.
Straight on down in case he's in competition for one of the other ones.
Who wants to vote for fucking P.T. Anderson or whatever?
Just boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom.
Rihanna, Rihanna, Rihanna, Rihanna, Rihanna, Rihanna, Rihanna.
And then you're done.
Dunzo, you've settled the Oscars.
Michael, this is going to fucking blow your shit up.
These fucking minions.
These fucking minions.
These little yellow balls with little pants and Googles.
Don't know what's fucking coming for them.
It's the Jordan Jesse Go Oscar voters.
You know who listens to this show?
Yeah, that's right.
Lupita Nyong'o.
And she has 10 votes. We'll be back in, la. It's Jordan Jesse Go. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart.
Jordan Morris, boy detective.
You know, Jordan, I was recently brought an episode of Jordan Jesse Go,
and you know who brought it to me?
Who?
The members of MaximumFun.org and our thanks to every single one of them.
Love them.
Love them.
Thank you very much.
We love those little diaper babies.
That's something that's going to come up later in the show.
Wait, did we do that in segment two?
Okay.
I take it back.
It's a fun tease.
It's going to be some diaper baby stuff.
A fun tease.
This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy.
Now, Jordan, you and I are real therapy advocates.
Oh, yeah.
I was just recommending EMDR to a guy.
I'm not going to say who the guy is,
but I was recommending EMDR as a type of trauma-aware therapy.
Yeah, something we do and that we like to talk about because we realize that sometimes people put off doing therapy because they feel like it's weird or they feel like it's strange or they feel like if they do it, then people will think that they're weird or strange.
But we're just you know, I put it off, Jordan, and I did put it off for a while.
I've been in therapy quite some time now. It's been immensely helpful to me, but I put it off for a while. I've been in therapy quite some time now.
It's been immensely helpful to me.
But I put it off for a while just because I was like, I'm not that broken.
You know?
Sure.
Yeah.
And I think that for all of those reasons, you know, people put off this thing that is really, really great for them.
And yeah, we think that you should try.
It's not something that you just need in crisis times.
But when you're having a crisis, it's like, oh, fuck, I'm glad I have this.
Yeah.
And however you can get to it, whether it's locally, community clinic, whatever it is.
And BetterHelp is online therapy that offers video, phone, and even live chat sessions with your therapist.
So you don't have to see anyone on camera if you don't want to. It can be more affordable than in-person therapy,
and you can be matched with a therapist in under 48 hours. So give it a try. See why over 2 million
people have used BetterHelp online therapy. This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp,
and Jordan and Jesse Go listeners get 10% off their first month at BetterHelp.com slash JJGo.
That's B-E-T-T-E-R-H-E-L-P dot com slash JJGo.
We're also supported this week by Wealthfront.
Now, Jordan, do you know about apps?
I love them.
I love them.
Do you know about stocks and bonds?
No.
Okay.
Well, look, if you did know about stocks and bonds, if you knew everything about stocks and bonds, well, sure.
There's a million apps that'll help you buy stocks and bonds.
You know what I mean?
Yeah.
By the way, I would love to buy stock in an app that helps you buy apps.
Talking about apps for the table, Jordan.
Sure.
Yeah. Those are similar words.
But look, there's...
All right, sorry.
Should have just rhymed.
Should have just rhymed.
But there are a million apps
that can help you just buy some stocks.
That's easy enough.
The cool thing about Wealthfront,
which is our sponsor
on this program, is that it makes it easy to invest, easy to grow your savings with a diversified
portfolio that balances risky bets. So that means they have portfolios literally programmed into the
computer, Jordan. That sounds so easy. Like in the movie War Games.
Wow.
And, you know, all you have to do is press that enhance button and you can choose between their classic portfolio or you can choose a portfolio that's about something that you
care about.
For example, technology, as in the movie The Mitchells vs. the Machines, or social
responsibilities.
You can just only pick socially responsible
stocks and bonds, Jordan.
That's great.
And you'll know that Wealthfront
was designed by financial experts
to help you turn your good ideas into great investments
without the hassle of doing everything yourself.
Ugh, I hate doing everything for myself.
$28 billion in assets being operated by our friends at Wealthfront.
And to start building your wealth and get your first $5,000 managed for free, go to Wealthfront.com slash JJGo.
That's Wealthfront, W-E-A-L-T-H-F-R-O-N-T dot com slash JJ Go to start building your wealth.
That's Wealthfront dot com slash JJ Go to get started today.
And we've got something up on the Jumbotron, Jordan.
Yes, we do.
This is from one of our listeners who has a special message that they would like to
share with other listeners.
Don't you hate when you find something you just want to bookmark and listen to later
as a podcast, but there's no easy way to do it? Try PodQ. You can save audio from anywhere around the
web, easily listen to it later in the podcast app you already choose. And you know what, Jordan?
PodQ works with links from YouTube, SoundCloud, Apple Podcasts, NBR, the BBC, and more. There's a 15-day free trial, and it's just
$5 a month afterward.
With no credit card required at sign-up,
visit podq.fm and start
your free trial today.
Talking about PodQ, baby.
That sounds really good and helpful.
It does sound nice. If you have a message for the
Jumbotron, whether it's promoting
your Q, or
just telling somebody you love them
because you know someone else who listens to this show.
Go to MaximumFun.org slash Jumbotron and you can sign up right there.
It's MaximumFun.org slash Jumbotron.
It's very affordable, Jordan.
And you know what?
It goes to support me and Jordan.
Don't worry.
Your money goes to support Jordan and me.
And Brian.
And Brian.
And Val.
Indirectly.
Yeah.
And you know what?
If Jordan gets some money, you know he's not going to spend it on Justice League Domestic.
International.
International only.
We're talking Captain Adam.
We're talking Black Canaryary who else is in this
thing jordan you know what i'm not going to spend it on russian manhunter huh you know what i'm not
going to spend it on right what a domestic man of mystery no it's it's austin or nothing yeah
austin can i tell you what i saw at the flea market today? Hmm. This is just in our ad segment here.
Saw something at the flea market today.
I didn't spend the $6 because it felt, frankly, exorbitant to me.
But it was a Mr. Bean themed Hot Wheels.
You know, sometimes it's just enough.
You don't have to buy it.
You can just see it and go, you know what?
That exists.
Yeah.
I saw that. I saw that Hot Wheels and it lectured me on how you can't have to buy it you can just see it and go you know what that exists yeah i saw that
i saw that hot wheels and it it lectured me on how you can't do jokes anymore but honestly you
fucking blew it you should have bought that thing yeah i probably didn't this is mr bean in the you
can't do jokes anymore crap yes oh bummer i know another one bites the dust i'd say he's really got
his head up his own ass but he's got his head up a turkey's ass.
You know what I'm talking about?
Yeah.
A raw turkey.
Right.
And that turkey is saying, I can't do colleges because of all those snowflakes.
Gobble, gobble.
Okay.
We'll be back in just a second on Jordan, Jessica. Love you, love you, love you.
Love you, love you, love you. Love you, love you, love you. Love you, love you, love you. it's jordan jesse go i'm jesse thorn america's radio sweetheart jordan moore's boy detective
and i'm my granddad i have no nickname i can't think of one oh Oh, God. Oh, the walls are closing in on me.
Michael, great nickname.
The walls are closing in on me, Rihanna.
A plus plus.
Yeah.
A plus plus.
Guys, can I tell you something that I saw with my own eyes today?
Please.
Sure.
I was driving on the freeway.
Driving on the freeway headed to Torrance, California.
Not to brag, just kind of a lifestyle thing for me, heading to Torrance, the gateway to the South Bay.
And I saw someone smoking a cigarette in their car with the windows up. And I just remembered that that's something people used to
do. Like you would get into your friend's parents' car and they would be smoking in the car with the
windows up. And it just was a normal thing not that long ago. And my thinking on this right now is you know when people say like we need to
get america i'm not going to use any slogans but you know how these people say sometimes we need
to get america back to when it was good right you know what i mean and usually people use an example
like oh you know like there's gay marriage now or you know there used to be jim crow laws or that
kind of thing and that it feels excessive to me.
It feels like we don't need to go that far.
Like we can have that in our back pocket if we need it.
But I don't think we will.
We can just say people used to smoke in the car with the windows up.
Fucking Jesus Christ.
That's all.
It just, you know, had that in my sights, had to take it down, you know. Holy shit.
Was it when you looked at them, there was like smoke filling the car? I can't even imagine. That's how far we've come.
Yeah. Maybe they were just hotboxing it, bro.
They had a cigarette in their hand. It was like, so when I was assistant news director of KZSC-FM in Santa Cruz, California, again, this is just lifestyle content.
This is not.
Look, I have an aspirational lifestyle.
Everyone knows it.
From Torrance to assistant news director.
Jesse Goop Thorn.
Well, I had one of those marble eggs up my butt, if that helps.
I mean, it doesn't help me, but it might help you.
In between the breaks, he did try to sell me on a pyramid scheme.
The news director was just...
I bought $13,000 worth of leggings from Jesse?
Look, we all did. It's fine.
If anyone needs leggings, please slide into my dm they make
your ass look amazing jordan thank you they do he's posing right now it's incredible and
they're wicking that's true you're wicking they're the girl who was the news director of the radio
station who was my boss she had a car and she would give me a ride home after we recorded the news and it was
either get a ride or it was like a half hour walk so it was a fucking thrill to get a ride and she
had a really cool car she drove a dots and honeybee which is a really cool car and she was cute and uh
so it was really exciting except that she smoked cigarettes in the car with the windows up
and so it was like an eight minute drive she smoked cigarettes in the car with the windows up.
And so it was like an eight minute drive.
And I would be like dizzy and nauseous.
No, this isn't the 20th century.
This is the 21st century now.
Anyway, when you're in a Datsun, it can be whatever century you fucking want it to be.
Yeah, that's what the good folks over at Datsun us yeah want it to be the bronze age it can be in a dotson they are a sponsor there's a little dotson
logo in the bottom right corner of all your there is yes if everyone just looks in the bottom right
corner of the podcast you'll see that dotson logo dotson honeybee it could be the bronze age and the dots and um have you ever you
know about this michael since since the main media that you consume is jordan jesse go hell yeah
you probably know about this thing we've been talking about which is seeing media or consuming
media at inappropriate times in one's life or an inappropriate contexts. Sure. Is this something that has ever happened to you?
Of course. Like you
saw Mitchells versus the machines at a porno
theater. Yeah, exactly.
Exactly. And everyone
loved it. No, I'm kidding.
It's a parable that I was going
towards and I'm pulling back. Yeah. Yeah.
This is great. Yeah. Good call.
But no, I
did see. Congratulations the oscar nomination
i'm really tanking tanking the whole thing right now um but hold on glenn close is texting me
tell rihanna it's off
he's unnominated um but uh but no i did um one time me and my cousin were so excited to see scary movie two
or scary movie one i don't know what it was one of the scary movies and i was like we're like
grandma scary movie is great and she's like sure i was like it's like airplane or something
and then there was just a scene of a woman getting blasted with semen into a ceiling and my grandma was there and she
was just like she was really she was like trying to be nice she's like oh oh oh okay okay they must
like this so i shouldn't make a big deal of it because she's a really nice lady and she's just
like averting her gaze as this is happening she's like i loved in living color i want to make that clear before we
talk about i love the wrote a song about it like to hear it here it goes guy yeah totally she was
a big fire marshal bill what happened between mo money and this she said i loved mo money
yeah because i bet you because you're selling it like Airplane,
where the main joke is, I had a drinking problem,
and then the guy splashes himself in the face.
I love it.
Everyone's having a good time.
Everyone can enjoy that.
But then a woman gets blasted to the ceiling with cum.
It was also in Salinas, California,
which sometimes has gang issues so there i think
there was also like a night fight in that screening and someone and like the call cops
came and had to get kicked out and for some reason we didn't leave we were like no we're gonna ride
it out um it was a bad bad decision all around that's a classic uh let classic decision whether to ride it out.
That was a decision made many times at the mission pool in my childhood was knives are out.
Should we stop swimming?
And the answer is you're safest in the water.
It's a reverse Jaws situation.
No one dove into the water knife first.
Yeah.
situation you know and dove into the water knife first yeah just swimming towards you hard to get a good stab uh well someone called with one of these uh someone called with one of
these and look we have this thing that records it and then brian plays it so we might as well do
that shit hi jordan jesse brian and guest host. Let me guess, the combined ghosts of Peter Cushing and Christopher Lee.
I'm calling in for the inappropriate content that you were exposed to on the wrong occasion segment.
I can't actually remember this one myself because it occurred under the age of four years old.
because it occurred under the age of four years old.
But this was a day where my father was watching me.
I was on the living room carpet in front of the television playing with a pair of My Little Ponies.
And my father was also watching Die Hard.
When my mother came in from grocery shopping and found us that way,
she was very angry at my dad for showing me Die Hard.
And he said, it doesn't matter.
She's so little, she's not going to remember any of it.
It was at this moment that I made one of the My Little Ponies say, yippee-ki-yay, motherfucker, to the other My Little Pony.
I don't know if this was the beginning of the end of my parents' marriage.
if this was the beginning of the end of my parents' marriage,
but I do like to think that it was certainly one of the first chapters in that epic downfall.
Thank you so much for what you do.
Have a good one.
That's why they call Bruce Willis the original brony.
Nice.
That was as good as a moth segment.
Yeah.
If it had been that guy with like the crazy high voice, we could have that to the moth you know he kind of talks like no wait that was uh more of a like a time that was like a mike
tyson voice you know the guy i'm talking i don't know the guy with a crazy voice i'd want you to
keep trying crazy voice guy yeah he's like, remember when I fought you in the Holyfield?
Oh, my God.
I mean, Mike Tyson, I bet, has some great stories.
Yeah.
He has to use notes, though, so he can never be fine.
He has to use notes.
He's like, I got my notes app out.
Sorry.
I'm studious.
Sorry.
Yeah. yes sorry yeah um that i mean that should be that feels like a feels like a you know because i mean
what's good that's that's what pop culture is now you're just they're just selling it back to us
selling our childhoods back just do a fucking my little pony where you push the tail and it says
yippee-ki-yay it's the horse theme kind of works the horse it a horse you because it's a kind of a horse guy
thing to say you know a horse guy wild west horse guy you know just it's it's it's right there it
works you can put a little stubble on the horse its feet can be bloody because it had to walk
over glass barefoot yeah yeah perfect i think that's a great idea jordan um can i pitch another sort of uh related nostalgia project
reboot type situation the return of the return of bruno that's the new bruce willis album right
we need to talk we need to talk about the return of bruno
make it an in the universe in kanto huh yeah oh okay i'm thinking about in kanto you're
thinking about the movie in kanto i do you know what i liked in kanto a lot there you go i haven't
seen in kanto i don't only tear things down i build things up and finally someone's supporting
the movie in kanto which i really enjoyed uh mike are there mitchell's versus
the machines toys um no guys i wrote a lot of impassioned emails oh boy and um for you know
for some reason i just think it's like i don't know whatever it's like it's like um how the
logistics work but they were like we promise you we refuse
to make money off this like there we i will be dead in the ground before you make money off
merchandising and i was like but it could be fun and it helps support the movie and they're like
no um and you know maybe maybe they have their reasons i don't yeah i know what the fuck their
reasons are what are they they sign their rights over to george. Yeah, I know what the fuck their reasons are. What are they? They signed their rights over to George Lucas.
George Lucas gets all the money from merchandising.
They don't have any interest in it.
Well, he needs it.
Poor guy.
Yeah, he does for his museum.
His museum of shit he had.
I will say one of my family's for some reason, my family like um stories that they tell is my aunt was one
once at a restaurant in san francisco and they saw george lucas and he literally had 12 model
beautiful women sitting around him like he walked in with them like you know that old infomercial
with the guy who was on the cruise ship and he's surrounded by beautiful women in bikinis?
It was kind of like that.
And they were all laughing hysterically at all of his jokes.
And they said, he said, wow.
Well, they were probably impressed with his collection of science fiction memorabilia and Norman Rockwell illustrations.
So George Lucas eats dinner like iPodcast?
Exactly.
Whoa.
Jesse, is that like a Bay Area thing?
You grow up and you get George Lucas sightings?
Yeah, I don't know about George Lucas sightings because I think he lives in like the northern part of Marin County or in Sonoma or something like that.
So he's pretty far from San Francisco most of the time.
But you definitely would like like a dad at your school would have met an Ewok.
OK, like that was the main shit.
That super fast Ewok that I talk about all the time is friends with you know vicente's dad
he comes sprinting out to shake your hand sprint you know what speaking of tearing shit down
something that i've been stuck in my craw for a boy for 33 years now okay fucking vicente
vicente from my elementary school you guys know this guy okay this is not okay i was worried this
is gonna be a town this is i was worried this was gonna be at the expense of a beloved entertainment
property but no it's just you know all right an eight-year-old yeah i can yeah expensive an
eight-year-old this guy said the 1989 loma prieta earthquake was fun like a roller coaster to him you know what fucking vicente how about
this i was in a door jam in my mom's apartment and you know what your boy was fucking crying
okay that shit was not fun i was in tears i was scared for days afterward and would not leave the
house so fuck you vicente and your fucking roller coaster
ride is it possible and again jesse we've that he tackled me in a game of flag football on asphalt
once yeah fuck you vicente people died in the loma prieta earthquake you they fell through a bridge
into the ocean i'm a part of this bullying circle now for this 30-year-old kid.
Now, I've never met Vincente.
Vicente, yeah.
Not Vincente.
You've been my friend for years.
Yeah.
So, you know, like, I want to take your side.
You haven't been my friend as long as Vicente has, but yeah.
Is it possible that Vicente was right and that you were being like a diaper baby?
Like a baby who needs a diaper.
You're talking about making a mess in my diety?
Yeah.
Making a boom boom in your nappies.
You're talking about stinking up my trousers.
Just as a thought experiment.
Let's say, what if he was right and you were being a diaper baby?
diaper baby so like if i was being a diaper baby but vicente who said that a horrific natural disaster that not only killed dozens of people but caused millions of dollars in damage and
stopped the world series dead in its tracks my grandma called us because she saw it on tv
when she was watching the world series that he was right and i put a boom boom in my diet
i mean i don't know i don't know i don't know i'm not an earthquake expert i'm a pop culture addict
right we have to check political facts yeah yeah how many Pinocchios did this get
three Pinocchios for that statement
because his diapy is full
three diapies
I'd say this
in response I'd say this yes it is
possible but no touch football
games should not have linebackers
it should really just be defensive
backs
receivers and quarterbacks
and look if there's an odd number of players you just have an all-time quarterback okay that's
going to be tony mccauley because he's little but he's got a black belt in karate everybody
knows that about tony mccauley and he had a nintendo and a fucking Sega Master System. Whoa. Cool. Jeez.
That is cool.
And he had his birthday party at Pizza and Pipes.
Pipe organ themed pizza restaurant.
Okay.
1% needs to be taken down.
All about finding kids from your grade school and bringing them down.
Yeah.
Yeah.
There's no moral way to get a Nintendo and a Master System.
Right.
No, you can't have a sega and a nintendo okay guys uh we create a lot of cool segments for our show we're very creative and think of
a lot of things uh we don't just come in here with a list of words that rhyme um and so when
someone calls in for one of those segments they usually just say which segment it is because there's so many that we've thought of at 206-9844-FUN or JJGO at MaximumFun.org.
And here's one of those segments that was our idea.
Hello, Jordan.
Hello, Jesse.
And I'm going to guess Hollywood hunk Mike Mitchell.
This is Chris in Northridge.
And I'm calling in for your beloved segment, Juicy Jams.
And I believe today I have found the juiciest of jams.
Juicy by Jume.
I present to you, Christian Hot Tubbin'. around this is what i said thank you lord for another day all the blessings just in my way
this okay you guys should know that existed this is real this isn't like some shit he made
first of all because somebody sent me this shit on uh somebody sent me this shit on Instagram. So I texted Ashkahn.
So wait, this needs some setup.
Okay.
So our friend Ashkahn from college who directed Jordan's student play that he wrote that I was the star of but probably should have been like fourth on the bill based on my skill and talent.
But they ran out of dudes.
skill and talent um but they ran out of dudes um but the other dude in it was not only did a good job but he's very charismatic intensely charismatic but he had the same name as the guy who may or may
not have killed somebody from the first scene of from the first season of serial so i think people
have the background now right i don't think i had the background and I was there.
His name was Adman.
So Ashkahn, our friend Ashkahn is a very talented actor who's got some notable theater awards.
He's also a talented singer and rapper.
And Ashkahn wrote a totally hilarious, totally great song called Hot Tubbin that is a huge hit on YouTube and is really great.
Everybody should look up Ashkahn's hit song, Hot Tubbin.
It's 10 fucking stars.
It's really great.
My kids sing it to each other.
It's a really, really awesome song. And this is a Christian song that apparently is built on a loop from hot tub in which I can, I can only presume they did not clear this sample.
Um, and maybe Jesus cleared it for them.
Hard to say.
Um, this is what, uh, Ashcon sent to me, uh, laughing emoji, laughing emoji, laughing emoji.
I said, I said, somebody on Instagram just sent me this and sent him a link to it. He wrote laughing emoji, laughing emoji, laughing
emoji, ridiculous. And then I was like, well, then he's taking it well. And then about five or 10
minutes later, he texted me again. Okay, full disclosure. Just saw my text of myself to you from MaxFunCon 2012.
Thought you were sending that.
Now I realize you're sending me a song that has maybe ripped off Hot Tubbin.
Or I'm just confused.
Hi, pal.
Good to hear from you.
So Ashkahn is on the case.
So good.
Ashkahn is on the case.
Ashkahn is there.
Don't fuck with Ashkahn is on the case ashkahn is there don't fuck with ashkahn devaron is this uh is this
gonna be a is this gonna be a blurred line situation where yeah he's gonna have to end up
this christian guy's gonna have to claim that he was so high he doesn't remember what happened
and he just went along with whatever pharrell told him to do
is that robin thick's defense yeah and then pharrell told him to do. Is that Robin Thicke's defense? Yeah, and then Pharrell's going to be like,
I got off scot-free and no one knows
why.
Remember when my hat
had its own Twitter account?
It was a fucking great hat, to his credit.
A lot of people were talking shit about
that hat. You know what? I'm all about building stuff
up, and I'm here to say that I really
liked Pharrell's hat that one time that he had that crazy
hat on. I thought it looked great.
And I really liked that time in social media where something would be in the news and then it would get its own Twitter account.
Yeah.
Like a snake that escaped from the zoo.
Left shark.
Come on.
Left shark.
Left shark.
A classic in the genre.
Yes.
Yes.
The genre here is sided sharks um if you if look if you have a call for a segment that we've created give us a call 206-984-4-fun
or send us a voice these were nice sounded. I bet these were voice memos. Send a voice memo to JJ go at maximum fun.org. Um, and look, if you're going to call in for one of our segments,
just know that it's not just something that you wanted to talk about. And then you name a segment
after it and claim that we invented it. That's not what this is. This is shit that we thought of
using our creativity. We use a lot of, we wrote these down and mailed them to ourselves.
Writers Guild of America.
I'm SAG eligible, folks.
I'm SAG eligible.
All I got to do is
write that check for $3,000
and I am in.
I am in.
I'm a union man, baby.
Someone cast Jesse
in something that pays $200
so he loses money.
We'll be back in just a second
on Jordan, Jesse, go.
Hi, I'm looking for a movie.
Oh, I got you.
There's that new foreign film
with the time travel.
There's an amazing documentary
about queer history on streaming.
Have I told you about this classic
where giant robots fight?
Or there's that one that most critics hated, but I thought was actually pretty good.
Ooh, I know.
The one with the huge car chase.
And then there's that scene where the car jumps over the submarine.
Wow.
Who are you eclectic movie experts?
Well, I'm Evie Wadiwe.
I'm Drea Clark.
And I'm Alonzo Duraldi.
And together we host the movie podcast Maximum Film.
New episodes every week on MaximumFun.org.
And you actually just walked into our recording booth.
Oh, weird.
Sorry.
I thought this was a video store.
You seem like a lady with a lot of problems.
Well, Manolo, we have a show to promote.
It's called Dr. Game Show.
It's a family-friendly podcast where listeners submit games
and we play them with callers from around the world.
Oh, sounds good.
New episodes happen every other Wednesday on MaximumFun.org.
It's a fast and loose oasis of absurd innocence and naivete.
Are you writing a poem?
No, I'm just saying things from my memory.
And it's a nice break from reality.
Are we allowed to say that?
I don't know. It sounds bad.
It comes with a 100% happiness guarantee.
It does not.
Come for the gains and stay for the chaos.
It's Jordan, Jesse Go.
I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart.
Jordan Morris, boy detective.
Mike, the walls are closing in on me, Rihanna.
There you go.
Say it with confidence.
You know what the walls you're talking about really are?
What?
The walls of Oscar success.
Because you, my friend, just went on Jordan Jesse Go.
We just closed the deal.
I just got a text from Nyong'o.
She said the fix is in.
I love it.
If Lupita, if you're're listening anything you can do talk to
your friends in the academy please you know how the voting works on the it's different for every
category so like if you're an editor now you have to be in editing to vote on the editing award or
whatever that kind of thing um for the animation award it's the same thing only lupita niango gets 10 votes and glenn close gets nine so close basically her decision
is whether to to dissent or just go along with uh she will submit a dissent from time to time
a fiery dissent like elena kagan mike we're gonna get this for you just like we got Chris Fairbanks' best documentary short subject.
Hell yeah.
He didn't even make one.
Yeah.
We got Ashkahn an EGOT.
Did we steal it from Lin-Manuel Miranda?
No, but we stole most of it, and pretty soon we will have stolen all of it once he wins.
Half-scarred. Mary Roach? What? No, but we stole most of it. And pretty soon we will have stolen all of it once he wins. Half that Oscar.
Mary Roach? What? Unbelievable.
She has an insatiable curiosity.
Half from him, half from John Legend.
She deserves the recognition. I will say, I'll say it one more time. Mike's movie is a delightful movie that you can watch whether you're a grown-up
or a child but if you have a child in your life and you want to watch something that you will
enjoy you're on the perpetual quest to watch something with your child that you will enjoy
this is a home fucking run because it is it is a delight it's it's touching uh it is moving
and it's very very fun and funny.
Wow.
Thanks, man.
That's why I did this, to get your approval.
So thank you.
Congratulations.
All you had to do was make... It's like six years.
Six years making a movie.
Yeah, it is a very special movie.
I am one of the childless ones that watched it and totally loved it.
Yeah, it's a very...
Jordan, I think maybe you're the one who told me I should watch it.
I think that may be the case.
I enjoy texting you children's cartoons that I'm watching.
I just want someone with a kid to know.
And it's on Netflix.
Check out Mitchell's.
And also there's a DVD.
I got to say, I'm going to be be honest no one's buying this DVD I saw it
in Target I saw it in Target but it's got a lot of cool stuff on it so if you're interested you
know what a lot of people got one of those minivans with a DVD player in it buy that shit
for the minivan keep it in the console baby absolutely uh yeah it's that it's it's a very
special movie all the characters are great the main character
is uh it's just a really like beautiful well-drawn character and particularly there's a little
montage where she's trying on she's a young person she's trying on new personalities
and you very briefly see her have a ska face it's it yeah great loves less than jake that's canon yep thank you and
she's uh you know she's a big nifty tom 50 fan i don't know that's not that's not a real one that's
a weird christian ska band anyway there were non-christian ska bands there were do you mean
like desmond decker or something no is that what you're talking about? Only lame third wave stuff, which I still listen to and like.
Madness, we're Zoroastrians.
Mephiscoffelies, the satanic ska band.
Yeah.
Well, anyway, Michael, it's an honor to be visited by you on our program.
Congratulations on the amazing movie. Congratulations on the amazing movie.
Congratulations on the Oscar nomination.
Congratulations, frankly, on being the first successful Jordan Jesse Go listener ever.
And I also want to congratulate you on being the first Jordan Jesse Go listener ever.
So between those two things, please tell your friends let lupita know please
tell lupita when she comes tell glenn tell glenn no it was uh it was an honest honest to god delight
i love this show i think you guys are hilarious so um it was it was my treat thank you our producer
on the program brian sunny d fernandez on the stream this week valerie moffitt uh look we're we're
on the max fun youtube channel live streaming these things people ask me well can i how can
i watch it afterwards no you can't you got to watch it live baby 8 to 10 p.m pacific time on
sunday evenings although we usually start about quarter after because someone's microphone is always not working uh that's just
the reality of using computers in the 21st century uh and in the pandemic but uh yeah just what you
can watch it live it's fun you know we're just fucking around over here you know it's not like
this is a real show um but valerie moffitt helps us with that our theme music is love you by the
free design courtesy of the free design and Light in the Attic Records.
Thanks to The Free Design.
They're fucking legitimately fantastic
and you should actually listen to their music.
And we're on Reddit, maximumfun.reddit.com.
We're on Twitter at Jordan underscore Morris
and at Jesse Thorne.
We're on Instagram at Jordan David Morris
and at put.this.on. And that's about it.
We'll talk to you next time on Jordan, Jessica. MaximumFun.org
Comedy and culture. Artist owned.
Audience supported.