Jordan, Jesse, GO! - Live at Sleeping Village in Chicago, with Peter Sagal and Sam Riegel!

Episode Date: May 8, 2025

This week’s episode comes to you from live from Sleeping Village in Chicago where we play games with guests Peter Sagal (Listen to Wait Wait...Don't Tell Me!) and Sam Riegel (Critical Role), plus we hear Momentous Occasions from listeners like you!Pre-order Critical Role: Smiley Day! By Sam Riegel!Go see Jesse at An Evening with Kruk & Kuip: An SF Sketchfest Tribute!Jordan’s new Spider-Man’s comic is out now! Pre-order Jordan’s new Godzilla comic! Be sure to get our new ‘Ack Tuah’ shirt in the Max Fun store.Or, grab an ‘Ack Tuah’ mug!The Maximum Fun Bookshop!Follow the podcast on Instagram and send us your dank memes!Check out Jesse’s thrifted clothing store, Put This On.Follow brand new producer, Steven Ray Morris, on Instagram.Listen to See Jurassic Right!

Give a little time for the child within you. Don't be afraid to be young and free. Undo the locks and throw away the keys and take off your shoes and socks and run you. Ladies and gentlemen, it's Jesse Korn and Jordan Morris and Jordan Jesse Korn! Welcome to the Dark Carnival. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart. Whoop whoop, I'm Jordan Morris, boy detective. For the folks listening at home, I know, there is the urge not to say anything about it. But for those listening on audio, Jesse and I are wearing perfect juggalo makeup. We, I literally, so Jordan had this idea, Jordan said we should wear juggalo makeup,

to which I for some reason said, okay. we should wear Juggalo makeup, to which I for some reason said, okay. And then I was charged with finding us a Juggalo makeup artist. We didn't have enough bath salts to pay them. I literally went on Reddit and posted on r slash Juggalo, weird request but dot dot dot and tried to convince a juggalo makeup artist to come here. Then we tried to get a real makeup artist to come here. And in the end, as you can see, we did it ourselves. And I have new respect for the juggalos. Yeah. Because mine looks bad. Let me just say whatever else is going on with them, they clearly don't have ADHD like we do.

I'm like, why can't I do this? A 16-year-old who's drunk on codeine cough syrup can do this. Anyway, it's awesome to be here in Chicago. We had, it's been a long time since we've been here. Great to be back here at Sleeping Village, Chicago, most beautiful city in America. Thrilled to be here. Did you hear what the pilot said? We were on the same Southwest Airlines flight.

Amazing flight overall. In fact, I literally had to start taking notes on shit that went down on the flight. But the first thing that happened on the flight was the pilot, you know how like they do bits on Southwest Airlines? It's awful. The pilot got in on it this time. Usually it's just, and the pilot went to the like phone that's in the aisle way, not on the phone in the cockpit, and he said, all right folks, you sure you wanna go to Chicago? Ah, that's fun.

I was like, wow, this guy, this guy, and then he did a bunch of shit. Um, it was really weird. I was like, I like Chicago. That guy's the bad guy. I'm the good guy. Anyway, other stuff that happened on this same flight. We took control of the plane and we flew to Chicago.

Pilot didn't want us to go to Chicago, check. Oh yeah. Our friend Janet Varney was on our flight. She's appearing at C2E2 where you were appearing. I love that we can get a pop just mentioning other podcasters. I mean, Mark Gagliardi and Hal Lublin were also on our flight. How about that? And you gotta say Mark Barron. Not on the flight, just wanted to say.

No, he just invented podcasting. Janet had, you know how in Southwest Airlines they have, you get like a letter and a number? Janet was A1. How the fuck do you get A1? Well I think if you lay down on a stake, that was better than the response. That was better than the response. That was better than the response. OK, I was sitting in my row, and I looked in front of me, and there was like a middle-aged man, maybe like 56,

older middle-aged man, sitting there. He was leafing through a stack this high, I swear to God, of printed out articles about the NFL draft printed out article case that wasn't even okay let's see what else have we got on my list of stuff that happened oh a woman went the woman in front of me reached to the woman across the aisle and went like this, the woman across the aisle picked up her purse, opened it up, and pulled out a full roll of paper towels.

An entire roll like this out of her purse. I will say the woman across from me pulled out a homemade sandwich from her purse and then pulled out a second homemade from her purse and then pulled out a second homemade sandwich. Hell yeah! Fuck yeah! Housed two homemade sandwiches over the course of a three hour flight. The woman with the paper towel in her purse was playing a video game that appeared to

be called Lonely Christmas. One of these cozy games. And then at the end, one of the flight attendants with no other explanation, as like people were like pulling their bags down just over the PA system, one of the flight attendants said, there is no golden retriever.

There is no golden retriever. Fucking leaving us with a mystery to solve. That was actually they were activating the winter soldier. Anyway, it was great. I've been having a great time in Chicago. We got in last night. I went ahead and ate a giant steak. Then at lunch I ate an Italian beef and then me and Mark and Hal went out and ate a giant steak. Then at lunch I ate an Italian beef. And then me and Mark and Hal went out and ate a giant deep dish pizza at Pequod's. My goal is to leave Chicago with no food remaining.

I'm actually here for the Comic Con and I had a salad at the convention center. You know, these Chicago foodies, they want you to talk about the famous food. You told me, Jordan, you mentioned to me that you thought they might have some, is there anyone else here went to the con this weekend, going to the con this weekend?

Yeah, C2E2 is this weekend. A few people. Yeah. Yeah, actually, this is not officially part of the con, but they did want us to make some announcements. So yeah, just a little bit of housekeeping real quick, and then we can bring out the guests and start the show. So these are some C2E2 announcements,

Comic Con announcements for people. If you want to feed Casper Van Deen, you can purchase pellets from the vending machine. Just make sure you hold out your hand flat so he doesn't bite your fingers. Please refrain from throwing panties and hotel room keys at Bill Amon, the creator of the comic strip Foxtrot, no matter how horny he makes you. If you're a piece of shit looking for something to complain about online, here's a preview

of some upcoming announcements for you. Superman is now bi, Indiana Jones is now non-binary, and the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are a polycule. This one just says, yes, that is how Anthony Michael Hall looks now, and yes, you are that old. Do not attempt to clothe the cast of Outlander. John Boyega will no longer be taking questions about Star Wars episodes seven, eight, and nine,

but he will answer questions about Star Trek 4, The Voyage Home. Sean Astin and Elijah Wood will not kiss, no matter how many times you ask. They save the kissing for their wives, who love to watch their husbands kiss each other. Having trouble remembering which thrilling adventure hour creator is Ben Acker and which is Ben Blacker? Worry no more.

They're now both named Frank Stallone. Just because you're dressed as Deadpool doesn't mean you can break the fourth wall. It's part of the maintenance room, and it's where the convention center stores the wet dry vac. If you see Spider-Man roaming the halls, don't ask him to stop criminals.

It's a nerd in a costume. If you see Dr. Octopus roaming the halls, run! That's the real Dr. Octopus! That's the real Dr. Octopus! Anyway, that's the end of C2E2 announcements. Yeah, thank you. Our legendary segment, C2E2 announcements. Love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, love you, It's Jordan, Jesse Goh. I'm Jesse Thorn, America's Radio Sweetheart. Jordan Morris, boy detective.

You know Mother's Day is right around the corner. Sure is. And look, we're all going to call mom. Sure. You're going to give her the old ring a ding. Yeah, the old ring a ding. That's a call. Yeah, okay. ring a ding. That's a call. Yeah, okay.

I'm talking, that's what I call calls, ring a ding. You're not gonna knock her unconscious. No, I would never, I would never knock mother unconscious. I would give her the old ring a ding, which is a nice phone call. Not a cartoon boxer's punch. I would never, I would never. Okay, but.

It's for kangaroos to do. If you really want to be a good son or daughter My recommendation to you is send mom an aura frame. Oh, yeah, can I tell you on what basis? I'm making this recommendation Jordan please Guess who's got a or a frame in my family. Yeah, that's right. My mom. Whoa, Judy's got one. Judy's got one Yeah, can I can I blow your mind? Yeah, Gail's got one, too. Okay. Well, Judy's got one? Judy's got one. Yeah, guess who else has one? Jesse, can I blow your mind? Yeah.

Gail's got one too. Okay, well, how about this? So does me, ma. Yeah, that's right. Beth has one. Wow, Beth! That's my mother-in-law. Listen.

That reminds me. I got to send one to my stepmother. These Aura frames are great. Moms totally love them. Non-moms love them too. I love my Aura frame because my sister can upload pics of her kids. I love seeing my little nephews there running around, totally fun. I have three Aura frames in my house for which I paid money.

Okay, so here's what they do. It's a digital frame. You can upload photos with an app, so you put it in your mom's house, your relative's house, your own house, and then everybody in your family, they get the app, so you put it in your mom's house, your relative's house, your own house, and then everybody in your family, they get the app, and you can upload photos, and it creates a beautiful slideshow. It's so much fun. Everybody loves looking at the new photos of the kids.

It's a blast. Jordan, I feel like I obsess over this when we're describing the Oriframe, but the thing that I like is you can have the app on your phone, and if you want to do a bunch of app shit, you can. OK, if you want if you're the kind of person that likes fucking around with an app, you can if you just took a picture of your dog and it's a cute picture of your dog. All you have to do is press the little send icon at the bottom.

That's the same one you would press to press to like text message it to somebody. And then one of the choices is send it to your mom's Aura frame. You can do it. It's that easy. It's fun. Your parent doesn't have to be a tech whiz. Very easy. Very fun. Named best digital photo frame by Wirecutter. And it's easy to see why. Aura has a great deal for Mother's Day for a limited time. Listeners can save on the perfect gift by visiting AuraFrames.com to get $35 off plus free shipping on their best-selling Carver Mat Frame. That's A-U-R-A, frames.com, promo code GO.

Support the show by mentioning us at checkout. Terms and conditions do apply. Jordan? Yes. I can't help but notice your grotesquely swollen eye. Yeah. I didn't want to, you know, I didn't want to interrupt the show by draining all the puss out of my eyeball.

Jordan, are you doing home lancings? I've been doing home lancings because- Is it because it's so hard to get an appointment with a doctor? That's the reason why. I've been lancing this thing myself. I don't know what it is. Sometimes I'll go online. You find info.

Is it good info? I don't know. My eye is just so full of pus. I know. Well, good news is Zoc Doc can help you. It's a free app and website where you can search and compare high quality in-network doctors. And this is the important part, Jordan, and this is going to help you with your grotesquely swollen eye. You can instantly book an appointment.

So you don't have to worry about you look up the reviews and then you try and find the office phone number and then you call it and you have to talk to someone and that person might be nice or they might not. And it might be one of those kind of doctors where they're not taking new patients or you can get an appointment, but six months from now and you're like, my eye is grotesquely swollen right now. This is so, so helpful, so, so handy. The next time I need to make a doctor's appointment, I'm going right to ZocDoc.

Stop putting off those doctor's appointments and go to zocdoc.com slash JJ Goh to find and instantly book a top rated doctor today. That's Z-O-C-D-O-C dot com slash JJ Gogo, zocdoc dot com slash j-j-go. Your website for real doctors. Hey, Jesse. That's not their sluts. That's just a slogan I improvised for them. Because I was like, what if people were worried that they're not real doctors?

They're false doctors. Sure. No. These are all real doctors. I don't have time for those guys. Got a medical school, residency, the whole nine yards. That's really cool. Hey, Jesse, if we have any Canadian listeners, specifically Canadian listeners in the Toronto

area- You're talking about Joey Votto? Rats legend Joey Votto? Yes. Joey, if you're out there and you want to celebrate the art of comics, why not come visit me- Wait, hold on. Yeah.

I've got Drake on the phone. He's looking for a comic book event. He can attend in the Toronto area Drake he wants to bring the whole OVO crew Drake there's room for you and everybody at the Toronto Comic Arts Festival June 7th and 8th at its new location at 50 Carlton Street Oh, that's a great address. Yes. Oh wait, Drake has another question. Is it by the way, I'm holding my phone up to my ear. Just to talk to Drake to talk to Drake. He's wondering if the Degrassi crew can come as well. Everybody that's all his friends from Degrassi high school.

Everyone from Degrassi can come everybody from you can't do that on television can come. Okay, great, perfect. Everybody from, what are some other Canadian shows that were kind of like weird? The Wreck of the Zephyr? No, that's the Chris Pennells. The Voyage of the Mimi? Was that Canadian? The Voyage of the Mimi, yeah, maybe not. Maybe it wasn't. That's why Ben Affleck's not Canadian.

He was on it. You know what, he's not. He's not, you're right. Well, we'll figure out another Canadian show soon, but first. Today's special. Today's special! That's the pull! That's the pull we were looking for. With that weird store detective that ate jelly bean sandwiches, I think, and there was a mannequin that came to life named Jodie. It's a wild country, Canada. And they've got a great comic arts festival that I'll be in.

And a very small hobo. The littlest of them all. Talking about the littlest hobo. Yeah, that's June 7th and 8th. It's free. I'm gonna be there both days Please come see me and get some books. I'm really looking forward to it I'm excited to see Canada and I'm excited to meet our Canadian listeners. That sounds awesome Yes, by the way Jordan every week on putthisonshop.com. We have been doing new drops. So we just did We just did pants. Mm-hmm. We got sunglasses, vintage t-shirts. Every week, new stuff. So go to putthisonshop.com.

Sign up for the email list. Check out the new stuff. We have hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of things that we have finally gotten the listings together for and are publishing a new set of shit every week at putthisonshop.com. So please go check out my antique and vintage store, because you're going to find something that you love.

We'll be back in just a second on Jordan Jesse Goh. La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la. You want to bring out our first guest? Yeah, sure. You know him as one of the hosts of the much more popular than our podcast, Podcast Critical Role.

He is, of course, also best known as the voice of Phoenix Wright, Ace Attorney. Please welcome to the stage, Sam Riegel. Sam Riegel, everybody. Yeah? Yeah yeah sure. How you doing buddy? Oh should I move this? Throw it in the audience. Somebody can keep it. Oh yeah there's a beach ball on stage. And now there's a beach ball in the audience. We don't have the sportiest fans Sam. When you... Is it just sitting there? When Sam threw the beach ball in the audience, most people covered their faces. You have to, you have to move it around.

Just have fun and throw it around. Have some fun. Yay! Oh, that's so fun. That's enough, that's enough. Do we need to pause for people to get their inhalers? Hello. Sam, you're a con pro at this point, right? You're a man who goes to cons.

Do you enjoy it? And do you have any like tips for con going? As an attendee or as a person who's signing autographs? Oh, either or. Okay. Well, I do do some call. Hi, everybody. It's so great to see you guys. As an attendee or as a person who's signing autographs? Oh, either or. Okay, well, I do some call, hi everybody. That's so great to see you guys. Look, it's Sam Riegel from Critical Role. The reason you bought tickets to this show.

By the way, side note, we can't hear anything back there, so I don't know what you said, and I still don't really know why you look like this. Sam, don't worry, still don't really know why you look like this Don't worry we haven't explained it okay, okay, okay good then then we'll keep going Sam that's on a need-to-know basis Listen stuff just happens in a show you don't need Sure. It's a little something called show business. Maybe last night at the college basketball arena that you played.

Is this like one of those cold opens of a modern television show where something happens and it's very bizarre and it'll be explained by the end? Maybe. This is prestige TV, Sam. This is the dead body at the beginning of White Lotus? Yeah. Sam, my wife and I have been watching the television show Bad Monkey.

It's pretty good. I really enjoy it. But it has one of those credit sequences, sort of like Mad Men or some of that. You know how all prestige television shows now have a really at long abstract, like ever since, uh, what was the funeral home show? Six feet under. Yeah.

Ever since six feet under, like every television show, if it's important, has to have like a two minute long. Sure. And this one involves piles of sand and stuff and we were watching it and my wife just turned to me and said, I hate credit sequences. The's the meanest thing I've ever heard her say about anything in the world. So she's never seen a little show called Step by Step then. Because that credit sequence.

Tips about cons, Sam. Tips about cons. You know, I go to cons, I sign a lot of things. I post with people for pictures. I've signed some really strange things. Do tell. Do tell. I've signed people's cell phones,

I've signed people's, every part of the body that you can think of. Guitars. Wait. Earns. Have you signed that part of the body that I'm thinking of? I believe so.

Yeah! Yeah! The back of the n-n-n-knee? A supple ankle. Jordan is a Victorian gentleman. Oh, mercy. Bring my fainting couch and smelling salts, for I saw the back of a knee. An urn? An urn with ashes in it?

Like of a dead person? I think so, yeah. Sam. I was asked to. No, no, I'm not. I was paid to. What, do you know who was in it? I did at the time.

I think it was more meaningful to them than me. Wait. Sam? was it Jimmy Carter? Yes. Huge critical role, huge critical role fan, Jimmy Carter. Love the show. He was making houses for the poor and he was like, I got it. Every nail he drove in, he was like, fuck dimension 20. He could like more than one.

Yeah. I am having a, oh, sorry, go ahead. No, I've also, this is my only tip to you, a fellow signer of things. Have a doodle that you're good at, because sometimes people want you to draw a doodle on them that they go then get a tattoo of. Oh my God.

Yeah. Sometimes they'll, you'll sign your name and they'll go get that tattoo. Do they just like, they'll want you to draw something and then they go get a tattoo and come back to the convention hall and show you later that day. No way. Do they just like think you're Sergio Aragonese or something? Yes. And I hide a secret message in each one, yes.

Yeah, he fold their skin in on itself. You can see a funny joke. I am loving C2E2. I've only been here one day. I am prepared to say it's the best con in the whole wide world. For one simple reason, beer on the floor. You can drink at C2E2.

You can just sit at your fucking little nerd table and drink while people come by. It's so much fun and like, I don't know if you've experienced this, Sam, but when you're signing comic books, a lot of people come up to you and tell you their ideas for comic books. Oh boy.

Oh no. And nine times out of 10, the idea is, what if Superman was bad? And I hate to break it to him, but some people have tried that. But like that conversation goes so much better when you've had two beers, I'm finding. That's true. Did you enjoy that today?

Did you enjoy some beers? I did, and they were like crafty. You know, it wasn't just a $17 Budweiser. It was really good. I had a lot of fun. I saw an advertising billboard for something that said it was Chicago's IPA, and I said, ha ha ha ha ha. As though there are other things.

How was it last night playing a basketball arena? Doing D&D in a basketball arena? Insane. It was so great. I don't know if you guys know or care who the fuck I am, but I do this D&D show. He's Phoenix Wright, ace attorney. Sam, I would say that probably half these people have a doodle you did tattooed on their arm. I do this D&D show and we did this D&D show in a basketball type stadium in front of 6,500

people or something like that and the place was, it had monster truck energy. They were going big shit. Yeah, it was crazy. And we had some props that we threw into the audience. There's no better joy than throwing something at people who want you to hit them with it. It was great. You hold the thing up and they're like, yeah! Bludgeon me, Sam.

Put my eye out. You did that a few times on the Dew Tour, right Jordan? You know what? I did work on the Dew Tour for a period and I did hurl some T-shirts at some screaming teenagers. Yeah. And it felt pretty good. It does.

It feels pretty good. Sam, do you wanna play a game? I love games, yes. Okay, great. Well, we're gonna need a contestant from the audience to play against Sam, who would like to come up here and is nice and won't fuck up the show. You right there, come on up.

Steven is gonna help you come up. Steven Ray Morris is gonna lead you up the stage. And do you have, and this is about conventions. Do you have like a fave convention that y'all have been to? Is there one that like stands out? Steven, you might wanna bring our prizes too. Oh, our prizes as well. I feel like I should say C2E2.

C2E2, besides C2E2, which we all love. C2E2's in Chicago. Yeah! Yeah! Where you get the salad at the convention center. Yeah, they love that shit here. I enjoy New York Comic Con a good deal. Oh, is this my, is she my rival or my partner?

She's your rival. Oh, well. It's your job to destroy her. I'm Sam, nice to meet you. Don't shake hands, you're too nice! Crush, destroy! Young lady in the cardigan in the front row with the eyeglasses, you look really trustworthy. Would you mind keeping track of the score during this game?

Okay, what's your name? How about, let's hear it for Kaitlyn, the scorekeeper, huh? Thank you, Kaitlyn. We appreciate that. Contestant, what's your name? Rita. Hi, Rita. It's nice to meet you.

Thank you for joining us. I'm so excited to be here. Are you a Chicagoan? Originally, yes, but I currently live down in Carbondale. How do we feel about Carbondale? Oh, good. Weird rivalry that's hard to explain. OK.

All right, Chicago. Well, Rita, we're going to be playing a game called The World Comes Together. Every year, millions of Americans gather in hotels and conference centers to share their special interests, business expertise, and once they're drunk enough, bodily fluids. We're gonna give you a real conference in the names of three conference sessions. It's your job to

tell us which session is a real session at that conference. So one will be real two will be false. One will be real two will be false. Okay. You guys ready? Ready. Oh do we buzz in or is it one at a time? No we're gonna go to you one at a time. Okay. Jordan should we start with Rita since she's from Carbondale and we like Carbondale? What about Evanston how do we feel about that? Yeah! Cleveland? St. Louis! Oh! There we go!

That's a thing? I didn't know that! I know! It's the baseball stuff, usually. Oh, baseball. Okay, baseball, baseball. Okay. I rode in a Lyft yesterday with a Lyft driver who was originally from Cleveland, but he's like, but I live in Chicago now because it's way fucking better.

Rina, this is for you. One of these is a real session at the International Pizza Expo at the Las Vegas Convention Center in Las Vegas, Nevada. Which of these is real? Fry like a champion. That's a mild meatball. Don't put that in a pepperoni slicer. One of those is real.

Ooh. One of those is a real session at the International Pizza Expo, Rita. International. I am gonna say fry like a champion. Rita, you are right. You are on your way to destroying Stan Reigel. Is it, did you know that it was that because they clearly copied and pasted that

and they kept the capitals? As gaps. There might be some hints in the slideshow. I did not get that reasoning. Rita at Fry Like a Champion, Tony Gemignani and Franco Pepe show that deep fryers aren't just for french fries and panza roti by creating unique delicious menu items. How much do you have to pay to go to this session? Forty thousand dollars. It's worth it though. How much do you have to pay to go to this session? $40,000.

It's worth it though. Our next conference, this is for you Sam, is Origami USA at the Museum of Natural History in New York, New York. Wow, okay. Here are your sessions. Make a space cat. Cats? Fold a space cat. Cats? Fold a space cat.

Oh no. Oh no. Eat a space cat. Talk it out. You can talk through the possibilities here. I know that folding is a big part of origami. That's right. And I'm not aware that eating is.

To more of a bigger part of Alf. I think that was great. I will go with fold a space cat. B. In fold a space cat, you will make an attractive, stylized cat in a mid-century modern aesthetic. Makes a great gift. That does not look mid-century modern to me. Nor does it make a great gift. I mean, there's a lot of problems with it.

But that is correct. Thank you, Caitlin. Caitlin, what's our score so far? They're tied 1-1. Thank you, Caitlin. Let's hear it for Caitlin. She's doing a great job. Keeping track.

Rita, this one's for you. This is from the Consumer Analyst Group New York Conference, Cignea, Botten Creek, Orlando, Florida. Which one of these is real? Candy Grab Free For All, Brandy Grab Free For All, sponsored by Hennessy, Brandy Grab Free For All, featuring R&B legend, Brandi Norwood, who is consented to being grabbed by a bunch of anonymous consumer analysts of all ages, races, and genders,

because it turns out she's a total freakazoid who's into that shit. Talk it out. That last one sounds like a Yoko Ono performance art piece. It's a Radiohead album title. I mean, I'm from a generation that really wants to go towards the Brandy Norwood answer, because I love her. And that one does seem real.

It does seem real. I mean, I always knew she's a total freakazoid who's into some shit. I just didn't know what shit she was into. Um, oh man. Um, I'm, uh. Big stinks. This is really hard.

There's a t-shirt on the line. Oh man, t-shirt? Yeah. Jeez, I love it. What's it say? She's holding up our beautiful Actua t-shirt. It's the Actua shirt. Uh, candy grab for up our beautiful act to a shirt. Oh, candy grab for all is going to be my final.

Well, the conference description reads as such candy grab free for all, according to the Wall Street Journal every year about 80 consumer analysts swarm a table snatching cookies, cakes and chocolate bars. It's every man, woman and child for themselves. So, yes, there is a candy grab free for all at the Consumer Analyst Group New York Conference. I was almost fooled by the Hennessy. Yeah, almost.

Let the consumer analysts have something, you know? They can't have happy lives. I wonder what their cosplay competition is like. Oh, it's probably wild. Yeah. NSFW. Caitlin, are you keeping score on your whiskey meat? It's a beer. OK, great. What's our score so far, Caitlin?

Thank you, Caitlin. You're doing a great job. Our next convention is the California Mermaid Convention at the Hilton Homewood Suites in Rancho Cordova, California. That's a good Homewood Suites if you tried the waffle bar. Which of these is a real session at the California Mermaid Convention? Thingamabobs, how many is too many? I hope it's that. The mermaid's bubble ball or shell bras for the extremely juggie. It's an issue. It's a logistical issue. There's a lot for less juggie or medium juggie mermaids, but for the extremely juggie mermaids? Yeah, talk it out.

No, it's a problem because when they're on land they have to hop and that could be a lot of movement that they have to control. Right, exactly. Yes, they have to do a lot of land hopping and yeah, because when they're on land, they have to hop. And that could be a lot of movement that they have to control. Yes, they have to do a lot of land hopping. Yeah, that could be tough. Plus, how big of an undersea snail can they find? It's boring, but I feel like B is the answer. So I'm going to go with B. The Mermaid's Bubble Ball is a celebration

of all things mermaid. Yes, there it is. Enjoy a four hour underwater themed extravaganza where we slip into a- Four hours? They have to be in that shit for four hours? Well, do you mean they have to have slipped into a realm of elegant enchantment?

If so, yes. They're gonna suffocate in there it's like a Springsteen concert this is for you yeah this is the festival of dangerous ideas Sydney Opera House Sydney South Wales Australia festival of dangerous ideas ending the tyranny of pregnancy. Oh! Babies are bad, a celebration of truth telling. Or child labor, pros and cons. Whoa!

Talk it out. Oh, man. Keep in mind, these are supposed to be dangerous ideas, so these are supposed to be dangerous ideas, so these are, it's very appropriate. Oh man, I, you know, as an older first time mom, I'm, you know, with a two year old back home. I'm drunk right now. There's a laugh of desperation.

Thank you for spending your one night out with us. Exactly, yeah. Because you couldn't get tickets to Patton Oswald. Five people run out the door. I'm like... I'm gonna go with the babies are bad. But not yours. Yours is great. Well, it's a celebration of truth telling.

I'm sorry, but the actual description is, ending the tyranny of pregnancy, three experts ask, is the emergence of artificial wombs and womb transports a boon or bane for women. Oh God, it's a terrible image. Very real. And yes, we have an image of birth on the screen, which I think is beautiful.

Thank you, Jordan. Some may find it screen, which I think is beautiful. Thank you, Jordan. Some may find it gross, but I find it beautiful. Thank you. Single mothers are the real heroes. No, no, no. I thought it was beautiful. Also, I just thought that particular baby was very ugly. The birth part was beautiful. Oh, yeah. Baby itself.

Weird eyes. What a weird eyes. Sam, this one's for you. At the Flow Expo Plumbing Convention at the Fairplex in Pomona, California, which of these is a real session? The grease interceptors, hydro jetting, colon, these pipes are clean. Or poops, just don't think about them. Jordan,

I have a comic book pitch called The Grease Interceptors. Oh boy. Somebody give me a beer. Oh really, that sounds cool. Man, if you're gonna go to the Flow Expo, I hope you have a sense of humor. I have a feeling it's A, but I'm gonna go with C, because I hope that those guys have a fun time, right?

The Grease Interceptors is your chance to learn more about the dynamic world of separating grease from wastewater. Ah. But yes, it would make a great comic book. Yeah. It's for you, Rita. Jordan, by the way, would you say there's more plumbers in the audience

or people who drive cars powered by biodiesel? People who get their gasoline by backing up into alleys behind Chinese restaurants? It's toss up. OK, this one's for you, Rita. Which is the real convention from the Mufon UFO Symposium at the Northern Kentucky Convention Center, Covington, Kentucky.

This one got identified. Walk-ins, starseeds, and hybrids, vital aspects of the ET phenomenon. The X-Files, why did our wives leave us? X of course spelled E-X. Oh man. Talk it out. Hey, since Peter Sagal's here, can I get a hint?

Like that's a thing, right? Can I get a hint? To get a hint from Peter Sagal? Hey Sagal, can you hear us? Are you in the bar drinking Malort? I think Sagal might literally not be able to hear us. I'm gonna guess B. What is a wakim?

I don't know, but it sounds. Your reasoning is correct, because Walken's starseeds and hybrids in this session we may unlock the mysteries of the universe and find the seeds of our awakening? In the end, Rita, we may never forget that we are

stardust woven from the same cosmic fabric that binds the universe together in a tapestry of infinite possibilities. I mean, this is just a talk about alien cum, right? Like, I mean, they're dressing it up, but... 100%. Caitlin, how are we looking score-wise? Oh, Rita 3, Sam 2.

Rita 3, Sam 2 has that beer. Oh, woo! Okay, good. Is that Chicago's IPA or...? It's a London Pride. It's a London Pride. How many rounds are... is this it too many halfway done it wouldn't be a Jordan Jesse go quiz if it wasn't a little too long three more three more

Sam this one's for you our next convention is fairy con international at the Hyatt Baltimore inner city in Baltimore Maryland. Do we have somebody over here who's been to FairyCon International? No? Okay. Somebody who just loves a second-tier slur? You're like, I'm more of a pixie guy. Okay. Here are your choices. Which of these is a real conference, Sam? Tinkerbell, fact or fiction? The bad fairies masquerade? Or if these wings are flapping, let's get to fapping. One's real.

Sam? I feel like if you're going to give... Hey, Sam? Yeah? Fapping means jacking off. Oh! Oh! I thought that was just a Chicago, sort of a term for someone from St. Louis.

A fapper. Oh, get these fappers out of here! If you're gonna go to a fairy convention, you're gonna want to dress up, you're gonna want to mingle with other fairies, you're gonna want, you're gonna be covered in glitter for weeks I'm gonna go with me Sam at the bad fairies masquerade art dance friendship and music all move easily across the boundaries transcending language race

and time I mean maybe don't throw race in there. That looks like it's transcending something. Does not appear to be race. Who's that guy? That's a fairy? Yeah there is just a guy there who looks like Danzig. No costume. I see that Danzig guy over there. OK, Rita, this one's for you. Fairies. Which one is... You wanna flap wings with me? Which one of these is real?

A real thing from Sexpo 2025 at Larry Flint's Hustler Club in Las Vegas, Nevada. The puppetry of cleanness and adult tribute to Marie Kondo. Pricaso Live. Cirque du Soleil presents Dump'em Out. Which is real. Oh my God. Okay, Larry Flint. I was worried that Rita was going to start crying. Not to be confused, it's not Larry David. We're talking about Larry Flint.

Right, yes. Larry David's hustler casino. A lot of fun. Oh, this is a total guess, honestly. casino a lot of fun. Oh, this is a total guess. Honestly, I'm going to go with Pricaso live. Pricaso live since 2004 Pricaso has stunned audiences all over the world, painting portraits, using only his penis as a brush. And we have an image of Picasso on screen and he looks at once exactly and not at all what you think he would like to look like. It's going to be a fun Google for the

folks at home. It's the sign. He signs. He signs the piece. Like Disney, like Walt Disney signature. And people get it tattooed on themselves afterwards. So yeah, if you have a real Picasso. Okay. You wouldn't want someone to think that Leonardo DiCocchio or whatever. Uh. These are your final two questions.

What's the score going into the final two, Katelyn? Your final two questions, Katelyn, what's our score? Rita, four, Sam, three. Rita, four, Sam, three. Is this our final question? Final, yes, these are your final questions. Okay. So Sam, you can tie it up here. Final, yes, these are your final questions. Okay. So Sam, you can tie it up here.

Or I could let the nice person from the audience win. Or, we'll find out. But you want this t-shirt! Wait, I didn't actually see it, can you say it? It says, it says, actua. Oh boy, you're going down. Okay. Yeah, what do you think, Sam?

Which of these is a real session from the Cactus and Succulent Society at the Huntington in San Marino, California? Australian bulbous succulent plants? Tiny spinies? Cacti at Bonsai scale? Or the peyote cactus. I just fucking solved it. Solved it.

Like literally everything, man, seriously. Write this down. It's kindness. It all comes down to kindness. A coyote just told me that and his crank was huge. Talk it out. Let me know if you need me to repeat any of those. Um, man. That last one sounds...

Tiny spines. That's a good rhyme. That last one sounds fun. As hell. I'm gonna have to go with A, the Australian bulbous succulent plants. Pretty boring. You know Sam, Australian bulbous succulent plants offers a fresh change from conventional attitudes and ideas about the diversity and beauty of Australian flora. So fucking sick of those fucking people and their old ideas about Australian flora.

We are all tied up. That one looks like a precasso over there. Wow, a real precasso. Yeah, a lot of these cactuses look like dicks. Caitlin, can you confirm the score for me? Okay, that means that this is for all the marbles, Rita. Ready. Sam, if Rita gets this wrong, you'll be ashamed.

Okay, which one of these is a real, yeah, a real session from the National Funeral Directors Association embalming and restorative arts seminar? art seminar. Genital makeup and adornment. Hair placement techniques. Head zo. Go wild, I guess. Nobody's around and he can't get any deader. Talk it out. I mean, I want to guess B, but I have no idea what head's over first.

The head's over, the head's over really throws it off. What does that mean? Yeah, yeah. But maybe that's a clue that. Only embalmers know that, like that's an inside term. It's lingo. Okay, I'm gonna go with. Any embalmers here, any funeral directors?

No? I'm gonna, I'm gonna. So what are you, a bunch of fucking librarians and graphic designers? Mighty cheer. Chicago, there's a couple of improv coaches, right? I do work at a university where like mortuary science is a big thing. OK, big deal. I'm going to go with B. Yeah.

Hair placement techniques. Heads up. The real description is hair placement and head. So this seminar uses Edzo models and specifically addresses hair placement techniques, a crucial aspect of restorative arts and embalming. You win the T-shirt. Let's hear it for Rita. Let's hear it for our friend Sam Riegel! Sam Riegel!

Good extorts! Thank you, that was awesome. Thank you, Sam. You can leave now, too. Oh, I go now, too? Yeah. Well, hey, any exciting Critical Role stuff coming up, people should check out if they're here in the audience

or listening at home. Like, have you written any in-universe advice books? I have, as a matter of fact. I had a therapist robot character and they wrote a Therapy advice book that's coming out this fall called smiley day. Well, we'll look forward to that book won't we Samuel? Sam Riegel everybody coming soon to a basketball arena near you. will face off in Basel, Switzerland, to determine who has the best song in Europe. On our show, we've argued about all the songs, and we are heading to Europe to bring you our reactions straight from Switzerland.

And on our next episode, we're going to predict who's going to survive the semifinals, compete in the grand final, and ultimately win Eurovision 2025. Albania, baby! It's Malta. Latvia! But we won't be alone.

Glenn Weldon of NPR's Pop Culture Happy are with us, sharing his own predictions and telling us why we're wrong. So make sure you're ready for Eurovision by listening to Eurovangelists on Maximum Fun, available everywhere you get podcasts. You never know what you'll learn more about on the Celebrity Trivia Show Go Fact Yourself. For over 150 episodes, we've welcomed guests like DJ Jazzy Jeff, Audie Cornish, and Andy Richter

to tell us why they love what they love and then get quizzed on it. And past quizzes have included some pretty unexpected topics like reverse painting, the perfect flip turn while swimming, Prince's house party playlist from that one episode of New Girl,

and so much more. Plus our guests meet surprise experts in their topics. Like the time we met an actual celebrity cow. So listen to Go Fact Yourself twice a month, every month on Maximum Fun. Do it for the cow! No! La, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la, la.

Jesse, I think we should introduce our next guest and get one step closer to explaining our Juggalo makeup. Our next guest is a public radio legend and a Chicago legend, as well as a columnist in Runners World Magazine. Please welcome to the stage, Peter Sagal. Peter, I hope that I'm not speaking out of school. Do you still have a column in Runner's World?

No. God damn it. Why did we invite you? I don't know. Who has it now, Guy Raz? I wrote a column for Runner's World for a decade. And you know what's interesting about writing about running for 10 years, eventually at about that point you realize there's nothing fucking left to say about running.

Yeah, I mean, once you cover... It's just running, basically. By the way, how many people at the moment after he said, public radio legend, Chicagoan, you were like, Ira Glass is here? Anybody? No, he lives in New York. Yeah.

Anyway. It's great to have you here, Peter. It's a pleasure to be here, guys. Peter, is there a is there because we're you know, we're here. We're here. We're talking comic con stuff. Is there an NPR equivalent of comic con? Is there a place where NPR fans gather? There there used to be and this is true.

So there used to be the public radio convention, the PRC, People's Republic of China. It fits when you think about it. We're all communists. Anyway. Wow. And it would happen every year. I work for NPR so I don't do political stuff. Yeah, I understand. Neutral. I abide by a certain code of ethics. And it would happen every year. It was one year in Washington at NPR headquarters and one year somewhere around the country. And I used to go to it, as one does. And then they did a survey.

This was about 15 years ago, maybe more. And they said, all the people who came to the public radio convention, they said, what could we do? This is all true, by the way. What could we do to improve the convention for you, to make it more worth your time and investment?

And the answer was cancel it. And they did. And this is true. The reason was is the people who did programming had nothing to talk about with the people who did like fundraising, and the people who did fundraising had nothing to talk about with the people who did like fundraising and the people who did fundraising had nothing to talk about with the people who did marketing, etc., etc. So basically it just became these individual conventions. So it ended.

I went to the public radio program directors, the programming a few different times. Once when I was with Public Radio International, they had this whole weekend lineup and we were supposed to do a presidential debate parody. That was going to be like the big PRI session with 500 program directors from around the country. We were going to do a presidential debate session. It was me, Kurt Anderson from Studio 360, past Jordan Jesse Goh guest, the very funny Faith Saley,

who was hosting a PRI show at the time. Was a lovely and talented. And Michael Feldman from What Do You Know? And Feldman wouldn't wear a necktie or a monkey suit. Well, to be- We literally were backstage having a yelling match with Michael Feldman. To be fair, he'd been in the system a long time.

It was rude to make him dress up like a monkey. Yeah. But then him throwing barrels wouldn't make sense. I know. He had to read the sketch. Couldn't get him to climb up to the top of the scaffolding either. That's an initial debate parody. Michael Feldman, gee whiz.

Nice enough guy though. By the way, can I tell you something just completely random? Sure, oh my god. The head of Nintendo America is named David Bowser. No way. Just something I wanted to mention. You're a Chicagoan.

Well I am now. You are now. This thing with St. Louis. It's just baseball based? Or is there something deeper going on? It's based on baseball. This thing with St. Louis, it's just baseball based or is there something deeper going on? It's based on baseball. Okay.

Okay, there's genuinely a rivalry and on our part here in Chicago, indulgence. Okay. We let them think there's a rivalry. Ah, gives them some. It makes them feel better. Yeah, a little nugget. This guy in my lift had really strong feelings

about something called tavern-style pizza. Yes. Woo! What's the nature of this pizza? Well, as everyone knows, Chicago is famed for deep dish pizza, and as everyone knows, deep dish pizza is bad. No, I ate it tonight and it was hella good.

All right. Well, I mean, it and it was hella good. Alright. Well, I mean, it's a little bit like, you're from the Bay Area, right? Yeah. I mean, you know, it's a little bit like going to get an Irish coffee. The tourists do it, and this is great, but nobody lives there, does it, right? Like clam chowder in a bread bowl. Right, exactly. Like never eaten clam chowder out of a bread bowl in my life.

Exactly. So we here in Chicago, we're like, no, no, don't eat the deep dish. It's bad. What we Chicagoans do is we eat Tavins style pizza, which is thin and crispier and cut on a grid. But here's the secret. It's also bad. Ah!

It's not as bad as deep dish. I don't know, man. That deep dish I ate today was hella good. Alright, I had an amazing bread bowl filled with clam chowder that I still dream about. I just want to point out the biggest pop we've gotten this whole show is from someone describing pizza. That gives you an indication.

Caliber of our program. Now Peter Segel, you of course host, god damn it. You're doing great buddy. I'm also a public radio host. You are. Peter Sagal you of course host Public Radio's premier quiz show, Wait Wait Don't Tell Me. Thank you that's true. Thank you to everyone who applauded for being here with us tonight instead of being at the David Sedaris show that's also happening tonight. Patton Oswalt, David Sedaris, the thrilling adventure hour. We were listing these things backstage and Sam Riegel said, it's a big night for white people.

It really is. I wanted to give Sam credit for that. Really, every other, it's all happening in Chicago. Every other city in America is like, where are the white guys at? Where'd they go? There's this whole Bon Iver concert that no one's at. I know.

But Peter, we thought you might be able to stand a taste of your own medicine with a quiz that we've devised. We're going to need a contestant from the audience to play against the quiz master himself, Peter Sagal. You right there with the beard. Come on up. Steven will show you.

Go this way and Steven will show you how to come around. Yeah, I just want to come over here to the stage. Steven Ray Morris will walk you to the stage. Yeah, have you ever been quizzed on your own show? You know what would be cool? While he's gone, we all leave. Comes back, empty theater. Great break. Cool joke. I'm sorry, say again? Have you ever been quizzed on your own show?

I've never been quizzed on my own show. Quick question. Yes? Could you get us tickets to see Patton? Because it'd be amazing. I was going to ask you the same thing. Are we all going to go over? I mean, anyway, I have never been quizzed. Hello, welcome. I have never been quizzed on my own show,

but I get quizzed on other people's shows all the time, because it only seems fair. I mean, people are like, hey, well, since you're here, we thought we'd turn the tables. Hold on. So this idea we had wasn't totally original. OK, wait, so Peter. You'll do it better than the 4000 people. I have an idea for a comic. What if Superman was bad?

That's a callback to something we said earlier that maybe you couldn't hear. I did. And I was really upset, because that was my idea. And I was. Aw. I mean, maybe you could have a fresh spin on it. Maybe. Jordan, it's one thing if they get that pitch from some rando at a comic book convention.

It's another thing if they get that pitch from the screenwriter of Dirty Dancing 2, Havana Nice. Havana Nice. The original screenwriter only ended up getting second story credit. There you are. credit. Important distinction. Peter, can I tell you, there are like, when I watch television with my kids and I see like Brian Posein or something, I will get excited and I'll be like, oh, that's my friend

Brian Posein on the show. He's such a nice guy, he's from Sonoma County. And they will go, boo, shut up, dad, how many friends do you have? If nothing but contempt for the idea of me having friends. When I told my daughter that I knew the original screenwriter of Dirty Dancing 2, Havana Nights.

She lost her fucking mind. She was literally running back and forth because she couldn't contain the excitement that I knew. The only other time this has happened is when I told her that I knew the voice of Gex from the video game Gex. I, um... So nobody cares about Dirty Dancing 2, with one exception.

I was at my niece's Bat Mitzvah, and it was... Did somebody just go, uh? Was that discussed aimed at nieces or Bat Mitzvahs? Peter, I think they're suggesting that, uh, that saying someone at a Bat Mitzvah cares about dirty dancing to Havana Nights is anti-submitted. I think so.

And so it was all the... It was... I think it was like 2005. So the movie had come out just a couple years ago. There were all these obviously 13-year-old girls, and they had been about 11 when the movie came out. And they could not care less that I had this radio show. Their parents, of course, were thrilled. But the girls didn't care. And could not care less that I had this radio show. Their parents, of course, were thrilled, but the girls didn't care, and then somebody told them

that I had some connection with the Dirty Dancing to Havana Nights, and they literally, all the girls carried me around on a chair. It was really... A lot of upper body strength. They didn't know. Hi, audience member, what's your name? I'm Jason.

Hi, Jason, it's nice to meet? I'm Jason. Hi, Jason. It's nice to meet you. Where are you from? Chicago. Yeah. Yeah. What do you think of both deep dish and tavern style? I think they're both really good.

Pea Quad specifically, probably my favorite pizza place. Can I ask you, what do you think about that salad at the convention center? Best in the city. Whoa. I'm going to have another one tomorrow. And Caitlin, do you mind keeping score again? You can trust Caitlin because she's wearing eyeglasses

and she has a nice smile. I think she's finished four beers at this point. Caitlin, are you keeping score on the side of a beer glass? Yeah, she is. I love it. Yeah, I fucking rule. Cool move. Caitlin's the best. You know what, Caitlin?

You get this t-shirt that says, radio sweetheart and boy detective and repeat and clankety car and explodo. Explodo, of course, my former PRI colleague, Kurt Anderson. This game is called Do Juggalos Dream of Electric Creeps? I guess we should just... hey they explained the makeup! Cool, the prestige! Every year Juggalos from around the world come together to celebrate the mysterious forces of the Dark Carnival. And every year in semi-abandoned big-box storefronts, Spirit Halloween stores hang up crudely animated puppet ghosts and charge $250 for them. I'm gonna give you three choices. Your job is to determine which

is an act at the gathering of the Juggalos, which is a Spirit Halloween store automaton, and which is some shit we made up. Okay. Are you ready? So I'm gonna back up a little bit. So you're gonna give us three choices. There's gonna be three choices, Peter. One of them.

First of all, don't tell me how to do my job. Technically, I'm telling you how to do my job. Okay. You got Sagal'd! One of them is a Gathering of the Juggalos thing. One of them is an act that performs at the Gathering of the Juggalos. An act that performs at the Gathering of the Juggalos. The second is an automaton, some sort of scary thing that you could find at Spirit Halloween

during their business period around Halloween, and the third is something you made up. Exactly. And our job is to pick the one that you made up. Exactly. Okay. Jason, do you wanna go first? Sure. Okay. Here are your choices. Johnny Evil Seed,

Bleed the Wicked, or Jacked Up Jill? Uh. Talk it up. Ha ha. And there's a lot of these, Jill. Talk it out. And there's a lot of these, so you don't even really have to talk it out, because this quiz is way too long. I'm gonna go. Got it.

All right, I'm gonna go with it. I'm just working this out in my head, but go ahead. I probably gotta go with Jacked Up Jill. Johnny Evil Seed sounds like a really dope show. Wait, Jacked Up Jill is what? One of them, you have to tell us which is the Spirit Halloween story. Jacked Up Jill is the one you made up.

Johnny Evil Seed is the show. And then Bleed the Wicked is the Spirit Halloween. You got zero out of three. Yeah. Jacked Up Jill, of course, is a spirit Halloween automaton. It's a kind of a creepy Jack in the box. And the Juggalo act is Bleed the Wicked, Bleed the Wicked, which is an upset man with no pupils.

Peter, this one's for you. Your three choices are Leprechaun Spirit, Emerald Bile, or Darby O'Trill. Which is the juggalo? There's a theme, I see. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Kind of Irishy.

Leprechaun Spirit, Emerald Bile, or Darby O'Trill. Hmm. I'm gonna say Leprechaun Spirit is probably the spirit Halloween. Emerald Bile. That's a pun. That's like an intentional pun. And you guys are not below that. So I'm gonna pick that. I'm gonna pick that for you. And Darby O'Trill is the musical act.

Fucking three out of three. Go mess with Segal. Impeccable logic. Yes, I believe that is Darby O Trill. We just saw there Leprechaun Spirit is a, you know, seven-ish foot tall creepy leprechaun that I'm sure people online call daddy. And Emerald Bile is of course a pun that we made up because we are not below that.

Do you think Darby O Trill performs with little people? I don't know. It's like you would gathering in the jugulis. OK, are you ready, Jason? Ready. Babble the demon, ouchie the clown, Jonathan the certified arborist. Jonathan the certified arborist. I'm going to go Babble the Demon is someone who performs.

Ouchie the Clown is Spirit Halloween and Jonathan the certified arborist is made up. Ouchie the Clown is a Spirit Halloween store automaton and Babble the Demon performed at the gathering of the Juggalos. You are absolutely correct. Very good. Hell yeah. All right. Can I tell you guys a true thing. We recorded our show last night at the Studio Baker Theater downtown. It'll be broadcast starting tomorrow and our quiz, the theme of our quiz that we actually offered to Austin Gouldsby, the president of the Chicago Reserve, was Spirit Halloween.

Wow. New story. And you did mention backstage that you tried to put together a Juggalos thing. I did. And found them to be lovely. This is true. We do this thing on our show where we,

I don't know, we have this quiz where two of them are made up and one is real and people love to pick it. It's just this idea we had 27 years ago and, and for a long time it's been my job to do it and I was like, oh, you know, it'd be funny. We can make fun of the juggalos. So I started researching the juggalos and the juggalos are lovely. The juggalos, you start reading about the juggalos and all these people like you saw in the picture are like, yeah, I grew up and I hated everybody and everybody hated me. And then I found these people here at this event

and I felt finally at home and I found my family and everybody's really kind. And it's like, family, family. And in saying clown posse is like decent people who have decent values. And I've got nothing bad to say about any of them. I mean, if you don't want to say anything bad about them, don't discuss their rapping ability.

But other than that, they do seem very charming. OK, back to Peter. No, me, yes. Peter. Peter, this one's for you. Flapjack Wilson, Cornstalker, Turbaki Lou. All right, this is a little harder. Flapjack Wilson, Cornstalker, Turbaki Lou.

Yeah. All right. Flapjack Wilson, Constalker, Turbaki Lou. Turbaki Lou, huh. I'm really at a loss. Let me, can I ask the audience what they think? Oh yeah. You know what, letbacalu, huh. I'm really at a loss. Let me, can I ask the audience what they think? Cause then we'll have- You know what, let's ask Peter Segel.

Peter Segel, are you back there? Can't hear us. No, no, no. Flapjack Wilson. You know, let's do it. Everybody gets one. Let's ask Caitlin. Caitlin, what do you think?

Caitlin's like, I am so fucking hammered. Let me ask, let me just ask this. I'm just gonna ask you guys, what are the ones you think that All right, let me ask. Let me just ask this. I'm just going to ask you guys, what are the ones you think that these guys made up? Is it flapjack Wilson? Is it corn stalker? Do you don't think they made up corn stalker, even though that's kind of a pun.

Turbaki Lou. Turbaki Lou. All right. I'm going to go with Turbaki Lu you made up. Cornstalker is the spirit Halloween because he sounds like a kind of scarecrow and Flapjack Wilson is the musical act. Another three out of three.

You helped! You helped. Cornstalker is kind of a pumpkin head man, kind of looming. I can also see people on the internet calling that daddy. I'll just do that to whatever. Flapjack Wilson, can we see them? Yep, that looks about right.

Looks like a guy who reviews fast food in his car. And Jabacky Lou, of course, something we made up. All right. All right, Jason. Belly Buster, Corpse-ulint, Lardy B. Talk it out. All right. I think Corpse-ulint is a Spirit Halloween thing.

Actually, I think it's somebody who performs at the... Isn't Belly Buster an entree, Dairy Queen? I'll get one later. I think Belly Buster is the Spirit Halloween, and then Lardy B is something you made up. At the Spirit Halloween store, you'll find Belly Buster. It's a kind of a pregnancy demon that looks like it's coming out of your belly.

But at the gathering of the Juggalo, you'll find Lardy B. No. What a betrayal. She doesn't give a fuck, she's flipping us off. Oh no. She is showing her opinion of intellectual property and fair use.

This is license parity, bitch. I don't really know how I feel about this, but it's possible that Lardy B does it for me. What if I'm into Lardy B? Peter, this one's for you. Your three options are, Bonehead the Talking Skull, Blood-E Blood,

or Blaze-Ya-Dead Homie. Bonehead the Talking Skull, Blood-E Blood, Blaze-Ya-Dead Homie. So, Blood-E Blood, that's sort of like Dug-E Dug, or... Yeah, yeah, yeah. Probably where that came from. Boney coyote.

Bonehead, the talking skull seems like it would be obviously the spirit Halloween, but it might be might be trying too hard. So you're trying to fool me, Peter, just so you know, in bloody blood, it says here the E stands for entertainment. So that was you. Then you could have you could have made Bloody Blood as just a very subtle reference to Richard E. Grant, something only I would see.

Sure. Yes. Lazy Dead Homie. I'm going to the Juggalo's love with Nail and I. Yeah, they really do. Favorite Juggalo movie. I'm going to say Blazy Dead Hom Homie's gotta be the musical act. And then I'm gonna say that just because, just come on, Bonehead the Talking Skull

sounds like something you find on a shelf. I'll go that for Spirit Halloween and Bloody Blood is what you made up. Can't catch Sagal. Can't catch Sagal. At Spirit Halloween store you'll find Bonehead the Talking Skull and at the gathering of the Juggalos you'll find Blazehead the talking skull and at the gathering of the jagalos you'll find blaze ya dead homie. Is it weird that he does it for me?

Jesse don't judge this it's okay just feel it. Just let it happen and call it daddy. Okay back to you Jason. Oh by the way, Katelyn, what's the score? Peter has three, Jason only has one. Pretty fucking pathetic, Jason. You'll never host a quiz show now. Well, hold on. Maybe after this we can do whatever Jason does for a living. What do you do for a living? I purchase fabric for an apparel company. Let's do it! We'll price the tablecloths, he'll walk away with it.

All right, Jason. Deddy Bear, Hearse Boy, or Salvador the Extra Spooky Ghost? So just, if I can help you with this here, Jason, imagine a ghost. Think of a ghost in your head. Pretty spooky, right? What if it was spookier? I think Hearse Boy is an act. Daddy Bear, something you buy at a Spirit Halloween. And Salvador the Extra Spooky ghost is something you made up.

He's back, he's back. You find yourself at the Spirit Halloween store, you might buy yourself a Deddy bear and if you're at the gathering... Before we say it, how many people think that Hearth's Boy is really gonna do it for Jesse? Show of hands, show of hands. All right. Yeah. I am so soft right now. Just completely flaccid. Sorry, Peter, I don't mean to disappoint you. Peter, this one's for you. Gore Leone.

Underworld clown. Edward Gangsta Robinson. Just to explain that one, it's like if the gangster film actor Edward G. Robinson, like if that guy, if his middle name was Gangsta, so that's why it's funny. Yeah, it's funny and the show's good. Yeah, it's funny and the show's good. By the way, the winner of this contest will receive this t-shirt that says, saying words, which is all a podcast is. How you can tell we're doing a podcast right now. This is for me.

This is, so Gorlione, Godfather reference, underworld. Edward Gangster Robinson. So obviously there's a there's a mafia theme here. So I'm thinking two of them obviously are real. They're sort of linked in the mafia kind of thing. If you were you were like, I'm going to say underworld clown, I'm going to say is Spirit Halloween and Gorlione and Edward Gangster Robinson. I just I feel like, I see I guess it's a toss-up. Which one did you make up? If I'm

right about the first one I'm gonna say you made up Edward Gangster Robinson. Gourlione, oh sorry, underworld clown you buy at Spirit Halloween. Right. Is it weird that he kind of does it for me Like a scary clown Gorlione, of course is the rapper The photo of Gorlione on screen is just a cartoon of a werewolf so maybe it's like a gorilla's thing Well, like it does it for me obviously Well that I think that does it for all of us actually. Yeah yeah. We're all in with you on that. That's a pretty hunky werewolf. That is a that is a jacked werewolf. Jacked werewolf. Yeah there's another one. Those other werewolves are totally

about to suck his werewolf dick. Jason this one's for you. Hey Peter don't tell NPR I work for them. this one's for you. Hey Peter, don't tell NPR I work for them. I was about to say they know, but I'm not sure they do. I don't think they do. He's usually on kind of late at night, and you know, it's the weekend and people are out. They're all asleep by the time they come up. Okay, this one is for Jason, right?

Okay. Die section with three Xs. Swamp Hag, Salamander X. Ooh. A lot of Xs. Yep. Yeah. Between section and Salamander for an act. So like dissection here, so that's like dissecting

something, but it also, the X's mean fucking. And there's three of them. They keep trying, I'll just point out, at least with the last one, they kept trying to explain their own joke. True, that's a good point. But the musical acts have been really horny. So?

So, okay. You think anybody at the gathering of the Juggalos is like, no thank you, I do not wish to fuck. I keep forgetting I have the makeup on until I taste it. Oh yeah. I keep forgetting I have the makeup on until I taste it. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah, that's right. I've made these choices.

All right. I think Salamander X is a musical act. I think Swamp Hag is a really generic Spirit Halloween toy. And then Die Sexy and You Made Up. is a really generic Spirit Halloween toy boy. And then Disexion you made up. I mean, you can use them how you want to. Joke. Swamp Hag indeed is something you buy at Spirit Halloween.

And Salamander X is an Insane Clown Posse affiliated rap group and we're just seeing a logo that is hard to read. One of those hard to read logos. Guys we are down to the final two. What's the score? Katelyn what's the score? Peter has the lead. Four to three. You know what that means, Jason these last two questions are both for you. You control your own destiny, Jason. Mushroom head. Peeper Reaper. Horn dog the magnificent. All right.

Jason, can I help you out here a little bit? Yes, please. So just think about a horn dog. Okay, horn dog, all right. What if it was even better? Okay, all right. All right. Peeper Reaper has to be a musical artist, right?

Cause I can't imagine they can sell it. Okay, nevermind. Mushroom Head has to be an artist? Yeah, it seems like like mushroom head might be. Mushroom head Peeper Reaper is clearly something you get at Spirit Halloween. And Horndog the Magnificent, going off the advice of Peter, is the joke you made up.

You know, if you went down to the Spirit Halloween store this October, you might get yourself a peeper reaper and of course if you went to the gathering of the jugulose you might check out mushroom head it has anybody in the audience been a fan of any of these musical acts somebody there was a woo was that an ironic woo or is there something you're a fan of here okay just like it in general? Wait, are you talking about these musical acts or just like pussy or something? You're like, yeah, I like it.

What? You got any? Okay, Jason, this is the final question. I'm sorry, I thought you said poppers. You can win it all here. Jesse, you want to do this one? Yeah, I do. Okay. You want to do this one? I do. OK.

You ready for this? This is for all. Caitlin, what's the score? 4-4. Caitlin, is that a tie? Thank you, Caitlin. Caitlin just did a Chicago handshake. You can trust Caitlin because she wears eyeglasses.

She has a nice smile. OK. You ready for this, Jason? Your choices are nibibbles the Clown, Finger Blasters, and Rakim, who is literally the greatest rapper of all time. Literally the greatest rapper in hip hop history who revolutionized and created modern rapping, Rakim Allah, the god himself,

of Eric being Rakim. Well, since I still have it, I wanna ask that guy. The guy who likes stuff? The guy who's into this stuff. Yeah. It's Rakim, right? Yeah. Is the artist.

And then, well... I didn't make Rakim up. Yeah, that's what I'm saying. That's a real guy. There's a Rakim automaton? Has he just not ever played at a festival? Is that what you're telling me? I could see there being a Flava Flav, but...

Okay, well. Nibbles the Clown is what you buy at a Spirit Halloween. And the audience is telling me that Rakim, what, they made up? No, it is, it's what I said! He's real. It's real, yeah, it's what I said, and then Finger Blast is what you made up.

If you go to the Gathering of the Juggalos, Jason, you might, wait, no, if you go to Spirit Halloween Store, Jason, you might see Nibbles the Clown. If you go to the gathering of the Juggalos, you might see literally the greatest rapper of all time as a supporting act for the Insane Clown Bossy. Opening for the Insane bossy also scarface has done that iced tea has also done it performing alongside

teal a tequila what is this event? Jason, you are our champion. Jason, you are our champion! Whoa! Enjoy your t-shirt that says saying words. This is kind of what I do. I know. Thank you so much. How's the quality of the fabric there, Jason?

Fantastic. All right. What's the best fabric in this room right now? This shirt. Yeah, that's your shirt for Jason, everybody. Yeah. Thank you so much. Go Jason.

Well done. We're going to have, we have a lot of stuff coming up after the program. We have some posters that we are glad to sign. Jordan has brought some of his books and comics which he is glad to sign for you. Yes, come out. I'll sign your books. We hope that you will hang around because as soon as we are done signing stuff, I'm going to be playing Classic Soul 45s out there in the bar. It's Friday night. This is Chicago. The only thing there is to do is drink.

That's your main shit. That and pierogies. Peter, you wanna hang around and hear some momentous occasions? I'll be happy to, yeah. Oh my gosh, let's do it. It's time for some momentous occasions. Let's hear it for Stephen Ray Morris, producer of the show It's time for some momentous occasions. Let's hear it for Stephen Ray Morris, producer of the show,

bringing us out some momentous occasions. Here we go. Okay, let's see, Jane, is Jane here? There's a microphone right here that you can come step up to. Jane, if Jane is here. Jane, Jane, Jane, Jane, there's Jane. Jane, come on.

Jane and then Mike S. Mike S, you're after Jane. So,'s Jane Jane come on Jane and then Mike s Mike s you're after Jane so hi Jane how are you Jane where you from st. Louis no I'm from Michigan oh we got a we're having some mic issues here Jesse's helping out with the mic and we'll get Jane's momentous occasion momentarily. Can you hear me? I don't think we can, Jane, sorry about that. Yeah, can we get a little... Hello? Hey, there's Jane.

There you go. Hi, Jane. Hello. What's your momentous occasion? Where are you from, Evanston? I'm from Michigan. From Michigan. Are you in the Insane Clown Posse?

No, unfortunately not. Where in Michigan, hold on Jane, where in Michigan are you from? Southwest Michigan, we live in like the middle of nowhere. Are you supposed to show me on your hand or something? Yeah, I'm originally from California. Okay, cool. Tell us about your momentous occasion.

Well, I have a dog. She's a year and a half old, and she is the weirdest dog I've ever owned. And she is obsessed with babies. She, today. You're like, she's got these green feathers all over her. She keeps repeating stuff I say. That's right.

That's right. Today, and this is not the first time this happened, we had a toddler in the conference room and they come to the office with me. And I turn around and I see her with her paws pasted against the window of the conference room because she saw a baby. And she's just pawing at the window because she wants to get in there and she starts just screaming.

She's a German Shepherd mix, and she starts just screaming. She's a German Shepherd mix, so she's very vocal. Jane, this is an adorable story. I will say that because of your penmanship, I thought this was a story about your dad being obsessed with babies. And pawing on the window of a conference room. So the dog was fun, but I was a little disappointed

it wasn't about your dad. I mean, I don't like, it's sort of my job to speak on behalf of the audience. Did you let the dog eat the baby? No, that would be a liability issue. That would be a liability issue. That would be a liability issue. Let's hear it for Jane from Michigan. And also California.

I think the, just thinking about it, the level to which it would be a problem or a liability issue would really depend on how much of the baby it ate. Right, yes. If it's just the little toesies, it's not a big deal. If nobody knew where the baby was at all. Right? That's a good point. You're a shrewd legal mind, Peter Sagal.

Mike Gatz, what's going on? Oh wait, yeah, where are you from so we can boo it? Yeah, well, I'm originally from Naperville. Hey! Whoa, what? Okay, what's Naperville? Why did you boo it? You psychos. Naperville

Naperville is a very lovely suburb. It's where Bob Odenkirk is from. You got cred. You got cred. My dad originally was a college roommate of Bob Odenkirk too. There you go! Originally? What happened? Do they have a fight? You know he never talks about it at Marquette. Is it like when Better Call Saul comes on he turns it off and walks out of the room? Or my dad has been lying to me my entire life.

It's probably true. Oh and Mike Zilla you're next. Mike Zilla you'll be next. After Mike S tells us his momentous occasion. Mike, what's your momentous occasion? My momentous occasion, King of Drugs. For folks who don't know, I'm the King of Drugs. Because once in a while, I eat marijuana gummies. Got an offer code for those? Can we offer these people an offer code? Did you go at checkout? I don't know.

I literally, because we have this sponsor that is a marijuana gummy company and because I so infrequently do drugs, I have so much marijuana at my house. No idea what to do with it. I'm 113 days sober today. I have a... Congratulations! I'm not, I'm 113 days sober today. I have a... Congratulations! I'm not done. I have a new job that I could pay to bring one of my best friends to the show that I never actually thought I'd see in live.

That's fabulous! That's really great. Congratulations, Mike! That's fantastic. What's the new gig? It's like a IT support job for law firms. It's a lot of sitting around waiting for calls to come in. Hell yeah. Wow.

At home, so I love it. And you're staying sober, man. That's awesome. That's great. One day at a time, bro. Yeah, it's doing great. That's awesome. That's great. One day at a time, bro. Yeah, it's doing great. That's awesome. That's adorable. Weird to be in Chicago where everyone's drunk all the time.

Yeah, I can't wait for these 45s. Yeah, that'd be awesome. I bet they got some nice hot water out there you can have. Yeah, well hey, how about a round of applause for Mike Kessler. Mike Kessler. Yes. And then we got Mike Zilla coming up. Mike Zilla hitting the mic.

There he is. Hello. I like that Mike Zilla knew to distinguish himself and prove that he was superior to Mike S. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Mike Zilla, we should do this for everybody. Where are you from? Chicago.

Okay. Cool. We love it here. And what is your momentous occasion? I finally got a bidet. My life. This came up on the show the other day, but I moved about three or four years ago,

and in my old house, I had one of those electric bidets with a fucking toilet seat warmer, a thing that warmed up the water that shot it into your butt. It could do pulses. It could warm the water whichever way you want. It could go back and forth like a... like... Like a lawn sprinkler. Yeah. whichever way you want, it could go back and forth like a, like, vrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr self-cleaning mode. And last week on Jordan Jesse Go, I addressed the fact that because there are no electrical outlets by any of my toilets,

even if I spend the money to buy one, I can't install it. And now people are fucking bidet shaming me. And you know what? If you want one that's not electric, that's your fucking problem. I've tasted the perfect bidet. I've felt its sweet trickle on my butt.

To say nothing of my taint. And I'm not gonna go to some fucking foot pump ass bidet. You pumping that thing yourself, Mike? Yeah, it's analog. It's better for the environment, right? The self-cleaning though, you don't need electricity for that, technology-wise anymore. But you don't get the seat warmer. Mike Zilla, let me ask you this, what's it like to have a fucking swampy stank ass because you don't have an electric bidet?

It's awful, I hate it. This is a moment of moment of shame really actually. Let's have Colleen and Emily come up to the screen next. Colleen and Emily. Hey Mike Zilla everybody. Mike Zilla. Cleanest butt in the room. Can I tell you something else that happened? So I posted a plug for this show on my Instagram. I was wearing a beautiful scarf, a nice army jacket. I was wearing a beautiful furry hat that I own that I bring with me when I travel to colder climes. I looked like a million dollars last night, 37 degrees outside. I'm recording this video on the riverfront.

Fucking immediately, four comments making fun of me for being too warm. For dressing too warmly in 37 degrees? Yeah. Supposed to be wearing shorts. You are like, it's spring, dude. Lol. You're weak.

Literally, I got a comment that said, bro, it's spring. Come on. Lol. It was a woman that posted it. Fucking over-incidulated bidet-less asshole. I know. Colleen and then Emily, we'll end on Emily if you're here. Emily, line up.

Colleen, hi, where are you from? I'm scared to say. Oh boy. Wait a minute, hold on. Is it St. Louis? No, I'm from Oak Park. Hey! Okay.

There's nothing wrong, I lived in Oak Park for many years. Oak Park is great, what's wrong with Oak Park? I mean, I don't know, it is technically a suburb. Anybody wanna let us know what's wrong with Oak Park? Frank Lloyd Wright sucks! Oh boy, oh boy, someone yelled, Frank Lloyd Wright sucks, now. That's true, that's true.

Prairie style, more like bitch style. He was a bad person. In the nature of my ass, that's a very obscure joke. It's very good, it was very good. He used to work for NPR until he came on our show. I know, I know. Well, Oak Park is great. Oak Park is like the suburb you go to when you still want street cred because you're on the Well Oak Park is great. Oak Park is like the server you go to

when you still want street cred because you're on the L and there is crime. So. Exactly, exactly. Exactly, yeah. Colleen, tell us about this momentous occasion of yours. I was very excited because my nephew is now old enough that I can send him cash for his birthday.

That is what he wants. He just wants to play arcade games. So I thought hard about getting him something else, but I knew he just wants cash. So I sent it to him and I got a video of him opening it up. And he's like, wow, these are some crispy 20s. Like he was very, very. Hard wait, is your nephew a drug dealer?

He might be. How old is your nephew? He's nine. He's nine. And he knew what cash was. Yeah, yeah. He was like, oh, aunt sent me some weird colored papers. It wasn't like that.

He likes vintage 1990s games as well. Vintage? Yes, yeah. So old ass. Old game. Like the one in the 1990s where the video games ran on Steam and Clockworks. You had to pedal Mortal Kombat to get it started.

People sitting on manual bidets playing analog video games. Yes. You say this is your nephew? Yeah. I didn't even know I had a sister. She's describing my children. Is Emily here? Maybe Emily has not lined up.

We had a pretty good momentous occasion from Emily. Let's hear what the fuck Emily's is. All caps. I had weed soda for the first time and that's it. She freaked out. She's too high. That's Peter Segel. This is my friend Jordan Morris. Stephen Ray Morris is our producer.

Thanks everybody, we're Jordan and Jesse Goh. Come outside, hang out, get some books, listen to some music. We'll see you at the lobby, buy books. I'll hug you and kiss you and love you. Love you. Love you. Love you.