Jordan, Jesse, GO! - Stache Rules Everything Around Me: Smokey and the Bandit with Adam Pranica (Bonus)
Episode Date: March 23, 2023As a special MaxFun Drive bonus we present to you the first episode of our Burt Reynolds recap podcast Stache Rules Everything Around Me! This week Jordan and Jesse are joined by Adam Pranica for a re...cap of 1977's Smokey and the Bandit.If you join us today at maximumfun.org/join you will get access to all 6 episodes of S.T.R.E.A.M and much more!
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Give a little time for the child within you. Don't be afraid to be young and free.
Undo the locks and throw away the keys and take off your shoes and socks and run you.
It's Jordan, Jesse Goh. I'm Jesse Thorne, America's radio sweetheart.
Jordan Morris, boy detective.
Well, Jordan, I have some great Max Fun Drive news for the folks who are listening right now.
Yes, that's right. You at home. It's Max Fun Drive time and we have a
special treat for you. Yes. This episode that you are about to hear, this super special bonus app
is part of our mini series, Stash Rules Everything Around Me, an exploration of the films of Burt Reynolds. Yes, we recorded six of these bad boys that MaxFun donors can hear.
You're getting this one as a little taste, but if you want the whole meal,
MaximumFun.org slash join. This episode you'll be hearing is Smoky and the Bandit,
a gosh darn classic with Adam Pranica.
Spoiler alert, Jordan, not all the films are this good.
Yes, the films have a wide variety.
A breadth of amounts of good and amounts of try.
Sure.
These are often very fun, constantly very weird movies movies and they were a blast to watch i laughed
like a maniac while we were making this mini series here's who we got for you of course this
is smoking the bandit with adam pranica we will be watching the best little whorehouse in texas
with ali gertz gator with maddie myers hooper with d Drea Clark and Alonzo Duralde, The Cannonball Run with
Stuart Wellington, and maybe most special of all, Smokey and the Bandit 2 with Elizabeth Gilbert.
I was texting with Elizabeth Gilbert before we booked this, and not only did she watch
Smokey and the Bandit 2, she also prepped for watching Smokey and the Bandit 2 by watching Smokey and the Bandit 1.
She went to her best friend's house and watched them with her best friend's teenage children who had no idea who Burt Reynolds was.
Gilbert does the work. We are the only podcast bringing our supporters 90-minute discussions of Smokey and the Bandit 2 with acclaimed novelist and Eat, Pray, Love author Elizabeth Gilbert. Choose Joe Rogan. Watch out, Comedy Bang Bang. Why aren't you bringing people who have been on
Oprah a bunch of times to talk about second tier, third tier, Burt Reynolds movie?
Yeah. So in addition to this little mini series, you get over 500 hours of bonus content from all
these MaxFun shows. Jesse, we've been doing these bonus apps for a while now, and we have a bunch of fun, weird kind of format-breaking stuff in the bonus feed.
We did a JJ Go drinking game where Jesse chugged weed sodas. We recorded an episode from a
Craigslist boat in the middle of... Yeah, we bought a boat on Craigslist,
sent Brian to go get it in Orange County,
and then rode it around on MacArthur Park Lake while trying to podcast,
which turned out to be very hard.
Very hard. Is the episode good? Absolutely. And the only way you can hear it is by going
to MaximumFun.org slash join. This was a total blast. We've been wanting to do something like
this for a while, and it was really, really fun to have the MaxFunDrive as an excuse to get in there, watch these weirdo, weirdo movies with
some of the best folks out there. Yeah. So we hope you enjoyed this one. And if you like it,
go to MaximumFun.org slash join to hear the rest. Jordan, if you'll permit me a moment of sincerity,
the reason that this series exists is because of the members of Maximum Fun. And I don't just mean Jordan Jesse Go. Of course, Jordan Jesse Go is forever indebted to listener members of Maximum Fun.
premissless show can keep going is that people support it. It's really, really nice that folks don't have to, but they like the show, they want it to continue. So out of the goodness of their
hearts, throw us a little tip to keep going. Beyond that, though, this Burt Reynolds show
specifically speaks to the new stuff that we have been able to pursue because we were able to hire Daniel Zafran to
produce the program. Brian, our producer emeritus, had to squeeze it in alongside his other work
because of just the number of hours he had available to work on the program. We were able
to add a lot of hours when we hired Daniel and that meant doing a cool
project like a complicated to produce six episode miniseries where we watch and discuss Burt Reynolds
movies. So if you want us to do more cool stuff like that, we do have more cool stuff like that
in the pipeline. Go to MaximumFun.org slash join. That's MaximumFun.org slash join. That's maximumfund.org slash join. And
we promise that we will continue to goof around with you. In all sincerity, please join us,
maximumfund.org slash join. Now let's get into Stash Rules Everything Around Me. with King, 36 to 18, live from Lansing, doing his damn thing, the last movie star who wants
the gun smoke with Bandit, your grams voted him most handsome, he probably got a wetter
than Mark Summer's pants, the man in front of the camera, think of deliverance, you and
your boys shouldn't even trip, stash fools while you fools got dirt on your lip, I said
stash fools everything, I said everything, everything, stash fools, stash fools everything. Welcome to Stash Rules Everything Around Me, or STREAM.
These are our bonus episodes where we watch and discuss a different movie from the frequently fun, frequently phoned-in filmography of the studliest of all muffins, Burt Reynolds.
in filmography of the studliest of all muffins,
Burt Reynolds.
You are hearing this because you are one of our MaxFun supporters,
and we thank you.
I am Jordan Morris from Jordan Jesse Go.
I'm Jesse Thorne from Jordan Jesse Go, and this episode of Stream is The Burt Locker,
a recap of 1977's Smokey and the Bandit,
an hour-and-a-half a half long, high speed folksy chase that
also doubles as a taste of what James Bond would be like if he wore a cowboy hat and
always had his Targa top off.
Today, we're joined by our pal from The Greatest Trek, Adam Pranica.
Hi, Adam.
Hi.
How are you doing, buddy?
I'm just grateful that I was chosen
for Smokey and the Bandit.
Yeah, well, congratulations,
because it could have been Smokey and the Bandit 2, buddy.
I wanted to roll into Smokey and the Bandit 2 so bad.
I haven't seen the second one.
We can save this for the movie talk,
but does he just drive right into the sequel?
Because it looks like that's what happens.
The sequel, it's all about them
getting that clam chowder.
Yeah.
There's a Smokey and the Bandit 3
that I think Burt Reynolds
has like 30 seconds of screen time in
just as a favor to his like
down on his luck friend, Al Needham.
Well, David Fincher directed the third one.
I think that's why it makes it tonally so strange.
Very different aesthetically. Yeah.
It was really upsetting when Jerry Reed's head turns up in that box, huh?
Absolutely.
They tried to clone the bandit and that scene where you see like the containers full of the hairy bandits. Actually, that's not the third Alien film,
is it? That's Alien Resurrection, isn't it? You're thinking of Alien Resurrection.
Oh, geez. Well, the joke's not funny anymore.
Don't worry, Adam. It wasn't funny to begin with.
This one directed by Hal Needham, we mentioned. He was one of Burt Reynolds' best buds. This was his breakout film. He was a longtime stunt director, which you can see in the text, as they say.
And can I briefly address the return on investment of the film Smokey and the Bandit?
Yes, I wish you would, please.
Because it is a genuinely extraordinary return on investment. This was not a cheap movie to make.
$4.3 million, not nothing in 1977.
Not monumental amount, but not nothing.
The final box office for this movie was $126,737,428 American. That's like a 3,000% return on investment.
That's bonkers.
It's approximately 10 Trans Ams filled with cocaine.
Yeah. It was second that year to Star Wars, a movie you guys might've heard of,
and squarely beat Close encounters of the third kind and
saturday night fever which were three and four and movies that look like they had big budgets too
like yeah of for sure and honestly how many star wars's have there been so far like 12
no one's ever counted.
A lot of Star Warses.
Hard to say.
Hard to say.
There's a lot of Star Warses.
I guess-
Some movies are secret Star Warses.
You don't know they're Star Warses.
And then boom, Yoda.
It's true.
Yeah.
Star Trek 3.
Have you seen Tar?
Yoda shows up.
It's a Star Wars.
Tar is a Star Wars.
I'd like to see Disney Plus buy the IP for Smokey and the Bandit.
Let's see some spinoff series. Let's see some direct-to-video. Let's see some kids animated
shit. Yeah. Let's see a whole prequel series about Sally Field's dumb fiance.
Everyone's doing young versions of things, though. Young Smokey would be big fun, wouldn't it?
Yeah, Lil Smokey.
Okay, I have a question for you, Adam, before we get started.
Okay.
What is your emotional and sensual relationship to Burt Reynolds?
I'm already in my own head about misidentifying the bandit as Smokey again. This is something I'm
going to do the entire episode.
Like I'm going to call Burt Reynolds Smokey,
like an idiot.
Right.
But he looks like a Smokey.
Exactly. If you saw that guy and someone said,
here comes Smokey,
you wouldn't bat an eye.
You'd be like,
well,
yes,
of course.
A lot of people think that he was Smokey.
It's one of those Mandela effect things.
He was actually McGuff the crime dog
yeah i mean i think for me like a lot of film enthusiasts like i watch deliverance and boogie
nights and that is what i know about burt reynolds that's film enthusiasts under 60. Right. And I watched Smokey and the Bandit with friends as kind of like the thing that was on TNT on cable television on a Sunday afternoon. And I would watch 20 minutes of that movie, a different 20 minutes every weekend for a couple of months. And like, that would be how I saw it.
like that would be how I saw it. You can get a pretty good sense of this movie. I mean, each 20 minute chunk of this movie is roughly the same as each other. 20 minute chunk of this movie.
Yeah. Nothing ever gets better or worse for the main characters.
That's true. I think I, I, you know, I, I, I know that Jesse and I both enjoy this movie a lot,
but it is not a masterclass in screenwriting. No, I would say nothing changes other than at the beginning they leave and at the end they arrive.
Yeah. And I guess at the end they get a different car.
Yeah, that's true. And there's a helicopter. At some point it stops being cars chasing them
and a helicopter also starts chasing them.
But crucially, I don't think we ever see the exterior of the helicopter. We're shooting up at a helicopter pilot radioing the rest of the police, but I don't think that guy's in the air.
Too much money.
Well, yeah, let's get into it.
I'll just walk us through the movie, if for some reason you haven't seen smoky and the
bandit and yeah we'll give our thoughts along the way so the film opens up with close-ups of
revving engines pumping pistons and spinning tires accompanied by the first of i think it is
three songs in the movie about the main character. Three different
songs.
That will be a running theme in this
series of each of these movies seem to have
a song about the
main character
in the movie. And frankly, Jordan, match that Star Wars. Yeah. Match that Avatar.
It's only ever been matched by Amy Mann and Magnolia. Yeah, that's true. Which I found a
direct ripoff of Smokey and the Bandit in a number of ways. Wow. You are a film enthusiast of a certain generation just 1997 right and i will say that the
first song about the bandit we hear infinitely inferior to the second song about the bandit that
we will hear which i think we'll get to but this is i think maybe my least favorite of the three
bandit songs but i'm but I'm glad it exists.
So yeah, we got these Revan engines pumping pistons, and we move on to a very fun scene
at something called a truck rodeo. I don't know what this is. I think it's just trucks racing,
like big rigs racing. Did either of you know what was going on in this scene?
They were wrestling, I think.
Wrestling, yeah.
Nude, sort of oiled up wrestling.
Oh, okay. Kind of Greco-Roman style.
If you can ride the hood of a semi-truck for eight seconds without falling off,
I think that's a big part of this, right?
Yeah.
And then there's clowns and stuff.
Yeah, I think so. This is the dawn of truck culture. I think that this movie brought just like, this is 1977, the year when John Travolta brought disco to America.
And it's also the year that Burt Reynolds brought the timeless cool of the big rig driver to the great people of this great nation.
big rig driver to the great people of this great nation. You know, what's so interesting about that is that like for as interesting as semi trucks and semi truck culture might be how little about
that this film is like this, this film does not have the confidence of its convictions enough to
lean into semi truck. And instead we're in a trans am like almost immediately, right? Yeah.
to lean into semi-truck, and instead we're into Trans Am, like, almost immediately, right?
Yeah, there's no pictures of the cool things about semi-trucks, like different stuff you can cook in a miniature slow cooker in the passenger seat while you drive, which is a
big part of Big Rick culture, I understand.
This credit scene might be the coolest visual stuff about semi-trucks that we get.
Yeah.
All these pistons throbbing.
I guess later we're kind of introduced
to the concept of like truckers and other people who like cb radios looking out for each other
which is literally everyone yeah owning and operating a cb radio this was before the internet
man that all you if you wanted to communicate if this movie was made now, Kanye West would be yelling anti-Semitic stuff into a
CB radio. Loud and clear, good buddy. Adam, you mock CB radios as though if you were 22 in 1977,
you wouldn't have been passing out those shortwave cards that give your shortwave radio name and frequency.
I had antenna envy every time I drove past a car
with those giant whip CB radio antennas.
Love it.
You're right.
So we're at the truck rodeo.
We're introduced to two colorful characters,
Big Enos and Little Enos.
Oh, where might I find the bandit?
I ain't seen him.
Over there behind his rig.
Who wants to see him?
Who's asking?
I'm asking.
Because I'm the guy paying him $25 a day so all his loyal fans can look at him.
Enos, of course, spelled E-N-O-S.
Is that a name that people have?
Are there Enoses out there?
What about Enos Country Slaughter, the baseball legend of the 1930s? Oh, he was one
of the leaders of the Gas House Gang, Jordan. I stand corrected. Apparently, Enos is a very
popular name. Enos, Enos. How are we saying it? Enos? Well, if it's going to be big and little,
we're going to say Enos. Let's say Enos. For sure. Let's go with Enos. These two fellas in
probably not technically nudie suits, but something that kind of resembles a nudie suit, a kind of a fancy Texas tuxedo.
The guys are looking great.
They have a plan to get 400 cases of Coors Light from...
By the way, I think it is worth mentioning.
Certainly, the great Pat McCormick plays Big Enos.
Little Enos, played by Paul Williams, the guy who wrote the songs for Phantom of the Paradise,
if I'm not mistaken. Oh, really? That's a fun fact.
Legendary songwriter, Paul Williams, and sometime goofy little guy actor,
Paul Williams. He also wrote The Rainbow Connection.
Really?
Yeah.
Amazing dude.
If you ever get a chance to watch an interview with Paul Williams,
he's just a fucking delight.
Yeah.
These two are a ton of fun in this.
So they have a plan.
They have to get 400 cases of delicious, refreshing Coors Light
from Texarkana to Atlanta for some reason. Something is going on. Does anybody know?
This is something I should have looked up, but what was the historical context for this?
Why could you not... If you need beer in Atlanta, why can you not just get it in Atlanta? Can
someone explain this? I can, yeah. So you know how In-N-Out Burger, the famous Southern California burger chain, can only expand at a certain rate because they have to be within access of all of the ingredients that they need and all those things. It is kind of a similar situation.
Coors beer in the 70s was not pasteurized.
And for that reason, because it wasn't pasteurized, the further you drove it, the more likely it was to explode, basically.
The problem is that Coors beer, you take that east of Texas and that's uh
at bootleg does the audience know this the audience in 1977 if you're sitting down at
the movies to watch this do you understand why why this scheme has to happen do people in Atlanta
want Coors as bad as people that don't have In-N-Outs in their state want In-N-Out?
I don't know.
I mean, to-
Was it that kind of need?
To me, the most analogous situation is the It's It, the ice cream sandwich that I love.
The It's It factory is in Burlingame, California.
And It's It can only extend as far as like Western Arizona because you can only drive frozen treats so far.
They don't use refrigerated trucks.
Well, they do, but they could use refrigerated trucks for the Coors too, Adam.
It's cost prohibitive.
It's cost prohibitive.
This is ultimately about ROI.
Yeah.
We maybe need to move on.
It's just a reason for them to get on the road.
But has the cultural
cachet of Coors Light changed over the years is it something people want really bad I feel like
now it's something you kind of settle on and you know could be a treat at a barbecue but it's not
like we have to do an illegal scheme to get it I guess I. It seems like it has to be analogous to television stations back then.
Like in the 70s, you get your handful.
Right.
Of TV stations and beers.
They don't have entire beer aisles in the 70s like we do now, right?
Yeah, I think that there were like tons of regional beers.
And so like if you wanted to get hamsms you could only get it in like the northern
midwest or whatever i don't know where hams is endemic to but but that all of them were bad
like i think there just weren't any even pretty good beers right unless you like knew a German guy. And for that reason, the fact that Coors was not terrible
was fucking thrilling. It was like when Pete's Coffee came to the West Coast and people were
like, wait, you don't just have to eat, drink Folgers?
So, okay, let's go with the premise that Coors Light is good and many people want it.
Enough to do a big, crazy scheme to get it.
So this is a science fiction movie.
Right.
So they're like, okay, we got to get this Coors to Atlanta.
We got to get the bandit who is famous for some reason.
Now, I'm finding a little flaw in their logic.
If we want to get past the cops why are we
hiring a famous guy to do it who everyone recognizes anyway i guess they recognize his
truck too yeah he has a famous truck with a famous mural on the side so yeah why anyway these guys
are clearly you know they you saw the outfits they're clearly concerned with maybe style over substance. Maybe they're
just like, this is the most fun plan we can hatch. And I agree. The plan is very fun.
Paul Williams is like, guys, I got to go write a number one hit for the Carpenters right now.
Right.
Why don't you take this crazy truck and do what you can?
Yeah. So they find the bandit at this truck rodeo and just a really, really iconic situation.
What a great intro to Burt Reynolds in this movie.
He's fucking chilling.
Cowboy hat over his eyes in a zebra skin hammock.
Oh, I love your suits.
It must be a bitch getting a size 68 extra fat.
Oh, my God.
So it's a vibe, as the kids say. God, I would love to lay in a zebra 68 extra fat. Oh my God. It's a vibe, as the kids say.
God, I would love to lay in a zebra skin hammock.
Jesus fucking Christ.
As a person who has had occasion on a number of times
to search for GIFs of Burt Reynolds,
it's surprisingly hard to find good GIFs of Burt Reynolds,
but there is a premium GIF of Burt Reynolds
taking his hat off his head
or away from covering his face and making a Burt Reynolds face that is gorgeous.
So yeah, Burt's here. He's famous for something. They hire him to-
Truck driving. I think he's famous for how good he is at truck driving.
Yeah, I think this is right. Is this a roadhouse situation
where you can be famous for being a bouncer? You can just be famous at good truck driving. I guess
people have signs with his name on it later in the movie. So yeah, he's a truck driver.
He will not be driving a truck in this movie, but he's famous for that.
They offer him a bunch of money to do this run. He agrees and goes to get his buddy,
of money to do this run he agrees and goes to get his buddy smoky nope the snowman this is a movie it's a two-hander called smoky and the bandit i guess smoky is code for cop but his buddy is
named the snowman so it could be called smoky and the snowman but at a later point in the movie
snowman calls bandit spider-man so i guess there's a world where
this movie could also be called spider-man and snowman which as a kid i probably would
have been more excited to watch when my dad recommended we watch it spider-man into the
smoky verse right can we just refer to the movie as spider-man and snowman i don't know why he
calls him spider-Man for one transmission.
He does.
Who cares?
Why does anything happen in this movie?
Who knows?
For the money, for the glory, and for the fun.
Mostly for the money.
It probably is CB radio talk for something, right?
Yeah, maybe.
There's a lot of code.
Right.
Probably means like super consistent hard-ons or something yeah someone who's
uncle ben has died if your uncle ben died if you ate boxed rice it means your uncle ben died
which means you're spider-man right so okay so what they're gonna do is so snowman's going to drive the big rig full of the beer and Bandit is going to block.
I've always been a little bit confused as to how this scheme works. Can either of you explain
kind of the logistics of this thing that they're doing?
This is the basic idea. The truck has to go really fast to get there in time. But if the truck is going really, really fast,
it's going to get pulled over. Somebody is going to check the manifest, give them a ticket,
take a look in the back and find that they have illegal Coors beer in there. And it's going to be
a whole operation. They're going to go to jail, thus impoverishing the snowman's family further.
And they're not going to get the prize at the end of the run. They're going to take Fred away. Yeah, exactly. So the blocker's job,
Burt Reynolds in the Trans Am, his job is to essentially take the heat. So as the truck
drives 96 miles an hour, if there are any highway patrolmen, et cetera, that would pull over the truck, it's Burt Reynolds' job to distract them and drive so well and fast that he eventually loses them. stops while the snowman and his adorable dog fred what's this dog's name fred fred fred the
basset hound fred the basset hound big big red eyes floppy jowls fred's a real winner how about
bringing me a hamburger for fred here i'm getting to worry about him he's looking a little thin in
the skin you got him eats hamburgers goes for a little swim He has the best time throughout this movie. He really does. He does
not get punched in the face by a bunch of Greek bikers. Yeah. Hey, it me. I love to eat hamburgers
and go for a swim. Even if I cramp up, I don't care. When Adam says Greek bikers, he's referring
to the fact that they're in a biking fraternity. Right. So the run begins and we get what i and i think we would all agree what is the
superior song about the main character in this movie he's bounded down loaded up and trucking
are we gonna do what they say can't be done we've got a long way to go and a short time to get there Which just fucking rules so hard.
Anytime that song kicks in, you're just so pumped.
The song blasts you probably seven times in the movie.
Better each time.
That's one of the miracles, right?
It's like they don't just do it the one time. It keeps getting better every time. That's one of the miracles, right? It's like they don't just do
it the one time. It keeps getting better every time you hear it. You're like, there's that song
again. Yeah. Telling me what's gone on in this movie that I'm watching. Right. I don't care.
It summarized the movie for me. Yeah, it really, really rules. So that kicks in. We're cruising down the highway and we meet
Sally Field, not in a field, but on the side of the road. She is in a wedding dress. She flags
down Burt Reynolds, jumps in the car. He says, I don't want to get married. And she says,
Terrific. That makes two of us.
And he just floors it out of there without asking her any more questions.
It's terrific. And yeah, this kind of like starts. It starts their thing. She is a model, dancer,
Broadway star type. She hasn't found her niche. She's trying a lot of things. She was on Broadway for 12 minutes.
We'll learn later. And she got haphazardly engaged to some guy and now wants out of the
wedding. That will cause some problems for our heroes later. But yeah, they kind of start to
banter in what is perhaps the most charming way possible. It really is great.
They have such great chemistry. Obviously, it's something that they're trying to replicate in
future movies, but not really getting. But yeah, it's pretty magical here. They're great.
I think if you're our age, these are two actors that i didn't quite understand why they were famous or popular
sure i think sally field by the time we were aware was like a lady who was famous for being
sad and crying in things forrest gump's mom yeah and burt rey Reynolds was already pretty washed out, like pretty much a drug addled disaster
who was famous for his failed marriage to Lonnie Anderson. In this movie, you get to see exactly
why the fuck these two were movie stars. Like, Burt Reynolds is doing Burt Reynolds shit,
and he is not an actor per se,
but the shit that he does is so spectacularly delightful and charming that you can never imagine him being,
and you're like, oh, I guess this, you know,
this guy is going to star in, like,
the great screwball comedies of the 30s or whatever.
in like the great screwball comedies of the 30s or whatever. And Sally Field is absolutely tremendous. They give her nothing to do. I want to be clear,
this is a poorly written character who's basically written to be annoying because women are bad.
And she is so fucking delightful and beautiful. Like every line she makes better.
They literally refer to her as a seat cover
at one point in this movie.
And she's so great.
And they really were falling in love
and had a very intense and tumultuous relationship
because of, mostly because of Burt Reynolds' problems
in his personal, because of his drug
addictions and just general fucking diciness in real life. But gosh, are they great in this movie.
Yeah, they really are. This is actually kind of interesting. This came over the old entertainment
newswire. I actually dropped this into the chat. This is just kind of interesting.
Sally Field was on Watch What Happens Live recently and said that Burt Reynolds is the worst on-screen kisser she had ever experienced.
Apparently, he had a lot of drooling. Yeah, which kind of goes against what you would hope. You
would hope Reynolds would know how to smooch. In Burt Reynolds' defense.
Yes.
Okay, thank you.
Thank you.
Someone's finally standing up for this real life asshole.
I guess I waited a couple of seconds.
I guess I need to be in defense of Burt Reynolds here.
Even if that were true, because they're exes, I don't think it's very cool to say about
him if you're Sally Field.
That's all I'm going to say.
Okay.
Okay. Okay.
So you think a rare, unclassy move from the usually classy Sally Field.
Yeah.
When I first read this news blurb, initially kind of shocked.
Obviously, Burt Reynolds, sex appeal for days, a sex symbol spanning multiple multiple decades you're like this guy can't kiss
but maybe it's a situation where it's just like this guy never had to learn to do anything good
just like is all natural charm probably never learned how to kiss maybe died without ever
having eaten pussy perhaps died without ever having what a having performed oral sex.
And yeah, maybe also kind of it's an explanation for his acting style.
Jesse, I've never had a mustache.
Is it possible that his mustache was just wet all the time?
Oh, interesting.
Yes.
Jesse, maybe you could provide some mustache insight.
Yeah, I mean, I guess it ultimately is going to depend on how much soup the man's eating.
Yeah.
Right.
But, you know, there are those who call it a soup strainer, Adam.
Sure.
I'd never stoop to such a hackneyed description, but there are those.
You wouldn't stoop to the soup.
No, I'm not a soup stooper, Adam.
You know that.
I might throw to our mustache correspondent from time to time.
Okay, great.
Just to hear back.
You know, this is a good time to introduce our antagonist,
a man whose mustache is the exact opposite of Burt Reynolds' mustache,
putting them in direct opposition.
This is, played by Jackie Gleason,
just a fucking great character named buford t
justice hold up on that car wash gentlemen you look tired boy rest yourself the red-faced southern
sheriff who will be chasing burt reynolds throughout the rest of the movie it's just a
really funny performance that i think I knew the parodies of
before I actually saw this. There's so many spoofs of this kind of character, but I guess
this is kind of where it all started and just hilarious. And yeah, with the wispiest mustache,
the thinnest drawn on with a micro pencil mustache you have ever seen and i kind of wondered as i was watching the movie is
this a you know is is this to make burt appear more virile you know is his is the mustache a
phallic symbol in this situation is this thick you know bushy bushy i like where this film paper's
going yeah anyway paging dr freud are you Are you saying that Burt Reynolds mustache is a
thick daddy? I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I don't know. I think that's
fair to say. I had read an article where an unnamed actress said that Jackie Gleason was
a great and dry kisser. Wow. So I think, I think relative mustache height, is it height that we're talking about here?
Makes a big difference.
Yeah, I think that's probably true.
Was it, can I say it?
Gleason loved to munch box too.
Gleason went downtown.
Oh, yeah.
That's how he died.
Is it okay for me to say that it was Gwyneth Paltrow?
Allegedly.
Allegedly it was, yeah.
So the chase is on. You know know you can buy a candle that smells like
jackie gleason's mustache on your website the inciting incident of this is that jackie gleason
is offended by the idea of the bandit because he is a blustering law enforcement officer. He also has an idiot son,
played by Michael Mann, the director of Miami Vice and so on and so forth.
No, I think it's a different guy with exactly the same name. He has an idiot son. Jackie Gleason's
character, Buford T. Justice, has an idiot son. His idiot son was the one who was engaged to Sally Field's character.
There's not any explanation as to why she liked him at all.
And she briefly says like, oh, he was handsome, so I figured why not or something like that.
Yeah. There's a scene in the movie where she describes the most heavy relationship she's
ever been. And it was an eight and a half day relationship with the singer of an
acid rock band back when acid rock was a thing that you described. Very cool reference, probably.
That was a pretty hip, hip reference. Some songs are eight and a half days long in the acid rock
genre. And so Buford T. Justice is both chasing a man who offends his sensibilities as an absurd caricature of a law
enforcement officer and the woman who left his son on the altar so yeah so at the altar or maybe on
the altar this guy's an idiot yeah i will say the extreme dumb guyness of this dumb guy is so funny
he maybe has five lines in this movie and they're all hilarious.
It's a wonder that his movies aren't funnier.
I mean,
collateral,
not a lot of laughs,
not a lot of laughs.
I think it's interesting.
You bring up heat because if you have not seen Smokey and the Bandit and
maybe you don't want to, I think Jackie Gleason's character is the Al Pacino and the
Bandit is very much the Robert De Niro of this movie, right?
Yes, a classic dyad, yes.
I think that's how most people would describe those characters. That's the analogy they would
reach for.
So yeah, so the chase is on. We kind
of keep adding and subtracting cops. Because this is a Burt Reynolds movie, we get to the legally
required broken bridge jump. There's a bridge out. They got to jump it. But maybe these movies are
all a commentary on infrastructure. Do you think? What's with all these broken bridges in these movies? Are they saying we need more money for public works?
How many of these cars did they make just to wreck, too?
What I like about these vehicles that the cops are driving is that... So Burt Reynolds is driving this famous T-top Trans Am with the fucking Firebird painted
on the hood. Just one of the most, if not the most legendary cars in all of cinema.
And it's fucking cool as shit. Like I'm not even a dude who's like into American cars or like
muscle cars or whatever, but it's famous because of how fucking cool it is
it rules he was unable to get the vanity plate bandit though and i think that that has got to
really burn him up somebody already had it but he did he was able to get spider man right
yes it says bandit 69 yeah right burt would never 69 jesse
that's never 69 in his life that guy won's didn't need to college football star movie star
never learned how Hey, we're breaking into Stash Rules Everything Around Me to remind you that it's Max Fun Drive season.
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is. It's a beautiful apron. It's like, this immediately became my best apron. So yeah,
but look, the reason to join is not just that you get stuff, not even just that you get all this
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Five bucks a month makes you a member, gets you access to streams, stash rules, everything
around me, and makes Jordan Jesse Go's wheels turn.
So please go to MaximumFun.org slash join. So that's what the bandit is driving, right?
And the American motor vehicles of the 1970s,
not the most high quality vehicles.
This is probably the nadir of motor vehicle quality
in America. And boy, do you see it in those fucking cop cars. Every single one of those
cop cars looks like they went and bought it at a junkyard. They all look like a fender is about
to fall off. None of them look fast. It is truly just a dire parade of pathetic motor
vehicles that the cops drive. And they all drive them with those kind of like, you know, that style
of flashing light that looks like someone like took it from the passenger seat, reached out
the driver's side window, and then like magnet glued it to the roof you know guys know about magnet gluing right
that's sure magnets are attracted to metal yeah the glue the glue of the earth yes but just to
be sure you want to use some glue where magnets are involved right yeah like all these guys are
just driving cars that are left over from dragnet in 1965 like These are sorry ass vehicles. So yeah. So we have a lot of just like
general driving around. It kind of cuts to the snowman talking to his dog in the cab of the truck.
Burt Reynolds and Sally Field are kind of bantering and flirting. Cars are kind of
crashing around them. The next time something happens is when they go to a diner. I don't know if this is the
name of the diner or just what they call diners, but it's called the Choke and Puke.
I think that's CB Radio Lingo.
Right. Okay. The name of the diner isn't the Choke and Puke.
No, I think there's a lot of fun CB Radio Lingo in there. And I think in a contemporary context,
it can be difficult to separate the CB radio lingo
from just things from the 70s we don't know about.
Sure.
I was expecting this to be a Jordan Jesse Goh formatted show,
and I was expecting to introduce myself
as Adam Pranik, a choke and puke.
I'm going to have to chamber that.
Okay, take credit now, Adam.
For the next time I'm on the mainline show. But yeah, I think a choke and puke is what truckers call a roadside diner or a truck
stop. So they're at one of these. Getting a burger for the dog. Getting a burger for the dog and a
large iced tea. And as he's enjoying his iced tea, which really made him relatable to me because I
really enjoy an iced iced tea. What a great beverage. As he's enjoying his iced tea, which really made him relatable to me because I really enjoy an iced iced tea. What a great beverage.
As he's enjoying his iced tea,
the sheriff comes in
and they really
make him so over
the top disgusting in this scene
that it is hard not to laugh at it.
What does he order? He orders
the El Diablo sandwich.
Let me have a Diablo sandwich
of Dr. Pepper. make it fast i'm gonna
goddamn hurry he's just like yelling at the waitress he like eats it and it like chokes on
it while he's eating it him and burt have a little back and forth he doesn't know so they've been
taunting each other over the cb radio so he doesn't know what the bandit looks like despite knowing who he is but knowing
only of him but not what he looks like anyway that part of it didn't seem to make a lot of
sense to me whatever who cares I think he must be famous just as some were famous on the internet
in the early days of the internet like they know his handle yeah i think he's famous
on cb radio but he they don't know necessarily what he looks like by the way diablo sandwich
a lot of research into what this is yes please the leading idea is that it's a pulled pork
sandwich with a lot of hot sauce that sounds good but some argue that it could be a Sloppy Joe style sandwich with ground beef, corn, and sour cream.
The stained shirt would lead me to believe that it might have been the second one.
Which of those would you guys prefer?
Honestly, they both sound great to me.
Yeah.
Yeah. This diner scene is basically, it is the two of them interacting while Jackie Gleason,
Buford T. Justice, doesn't recognize Burt Reynolds.
And apparently this was a scene that was not in the script, but was suggested by Jackie
Gleason, a guy who knows a little bit about a bit of business.
Yeah.
And I guess according to the fun facts that our producer Daniel provided
in our preparation doc, I guess the idea to have- Hold on, Jordan. According to our
encyclopedic knowledge of the film. Right. Yes. I forgot. What did I say?
We all listen to the commentary track, right? Yeah, you have to. To come on this show,
you have to listen. You have to watch it once and then once with the commentary.
I'm glad I didn't do that for nothing. we insist you buy the physical media of these movies how did they get pauline
kale to do that commentary track by the way just just a fan i guess that the idea to have the
dumb son in the car the whole time was also jackie gleason's idea which is it's kind of brilliant
because you know like because their little dynamic is so fun, so funny.
At some point, the top of their car is ripped off so that the dumb son has to
hold the sheriff's hat on his head while they're driving. Very fun, very fun physical gag.
So yeah, it's sort of like when James Burroughs directs a TV show and they say it's not that he like changes the script.
It's just that he knows exactly on a sitcom how to add the perfect business to it.
Like he just gives somebody a little something to do that makes it perfect.
And you feel like Jackie Gleason's 7000 years of entertainment experience are informing every moment of the film as he does this ridiculous half accent.
She assaulted my body and that's nothing but pure and simple old fashioned communism.
other movies that we'll be watching there's clearly like rift moments that like burt reynolds thinks is funny or that like cracked up the crew or whatever and these are uniformly bad these are
uniformly like unfunny or offensive or nonsensical you know and it's like his his effectiveness does
not come from like having studied anything you
know it's it's all just kind of natural and effortless so it is it is nice to have like
jackie gleason and sally field in here being like good at something you know so then everybody else
is like natural charm can shine through yeah because I think the natural sidekick, like the second billing
in this movie goes to Jerry Reed as a snowman, and he is not an actor. He is a fun guy. And he
is very fun in the movie. Don't get me wrong. Every time he says a down South weirdism.
Because I need to pull off here and suck up a
little go-go juice and put some groceries down my neck so y'all be careful and i'll catch you later
which is basically the premise of the character is that sometimes he'll say like uh you know a pig
and a poke is is two in the dirt right when you're talking about black eyed peas or whatever down
south weirdism is genital warts right yeah exactly but he's not i think he's
worried about getting a divorce too that's also a part of the character he's concerned about his
wife divorcing him he's like a guy that they knew that they thought was cool yeah and he is cool
jackie he's great no he's very cool uh jackie gleason and sally field are such fucking like you get it's funny because you know
like if you watch like the hustler you know the paul newman jackie gleason like almost two-hander
about a pool shark where jackie gleason's like a legendary kind of older pool shark
which is just one of the great movies, just like a truly exceptional movie.
You like see Jackie Gleason and you're like, oh, this guy's a show business legend who created the
sitcom, but he is a real actor and a real performer. And he got that way because he's
captivating. Right. In this movie, you get to see him do something that is more ridiculous than The Honeymooners by like 70%. Like just true vaudeville bullshit. Just absurd nonsense with a goofy mustache and a ridiculous accent. And you're like, Jesus Christ, this fucking show business.
Yeah.
Oh, this is what entertainment is supposed to be the fact that this works is so
amazing the fact that this character is like so fun to watch throughout this movie and isn't
annoying immediately is is is totally amazing and so he's he's in the diner he's scarfing down the
el diablo he goes in the bathroom he says i'm gonna you know i gotta squeeze out a groundhog
or something like that and he comes out of the bathroom trailing a long
stranded toilet paper god damn it if i didn't laugh at that great toilet paper gag uh-huh
it's so long it's really long adam you're right the toilet paper was long
this was long give the let's give the audience a sense of scale on this toilet paper. How long was it?
How long was it?
A short piece of toilet paper you're trailing.
What did that be?
24 inches?
Maybe.
I don't know.
Let's talk about the scale of this piece of toilet paper that's trailing behind Buford T. Justice.
Adam, how would you characterize this toilet paper?
I mean, a double roll at least.
But I don't think they were making double rolls back then, guys.
Right, so this is an innovative film as well.
A lot of people think this is just workmanlike filmmaking.
It predicted, yeah, right.
Yeah.
And this toilet paper, you can't exactly see,
but it sure seems quilted.
Maybe, yeah.
Let me ask you a dark question.
Yeah, let's get into it.
A person from the restaurant comes out
and gets buford to understand that he's got this mile of toilet paper stuck to him oh the toilet
paper is long yeah the way she takes it off of him suggests that she plans on rolling it back
on the roll she is so careful with it did you notice this yes she's gonna put it back on the roll. She is so careful with it. Did you notice this?
She is.
She's going to put it back, isn't she? Can you imagine?
Okay.
So as technology is introduced, over time, it becomes less and less expensive, like logarithmically or whatever, right?
Look, I'm no math genius, but it is not even a direct descent in price.
It starts real expensive, pocket calculators for $500.
And then all of a sudden, after a few years, they're 99 cents.
So think about the fact that if we went into the grocery store right now to buy
quilted double roll toilet paper, we're going to lay out $4 a roll or something
because this is a premium
product it might even have lotion in it okay yeah imagine what that cost in 1977 when this
is something that had to be made bespoke okay this is one square at a time choke and puke doesn't
have the budget for that imported from italy adam a choke and puke has to hang on to every fucking
they don't have a square to spare
yeah they're making their chili out of the scrapings exactly so we got this great toilet
you gotta get your pulp somewhere adam we got this great toilet paper gag and then as i alluded
to earlier there's a cool pretty cool car stunt where they're the top of the sheriff's car. They try to go under a truck.
They can't do it.
The top gets ripped off.
There's just this great take where the dumb son just kind of pops his head up and goes,
Daddy, the top came off.
No shit.
Very funny.
Jordan, there are Burt Reynolds movies where you feel less than enthusiastic about the volume and sort of
car action. How do you feel about the car action in this film in general? Is there too much? Is it
too boring? Too samesy? Yeah. I mean, you know, the movie has like a, you know, it's got a pretty
saggy middle. But the cool stuff happening is pretty cool. Yeah. I mean, I think this is the cream of the
crop for me. A lot of other movies we're going to be watching for this series do feel like weird
photocopies of this movie and not understanding what makes it work and maybe learning some of
the wrong lessons from this movie. But yeah, no, this this is pretty entertaining the car stuff is a lot of fun
it you know it seems to me like how i've heard they put together those mission impossible movies
they just figure out five things tom cruise wants to do he wants to you know hang off the side of a
plane he wants to you know whatever be underwater for 10 minutes and then they kind of write the plot around that
right and i love those mission impossible movies i'll watch any they're fantastic crank them out i
say crank them out but they do really have that quality of like the plot of this is it's you know
kind of strung around these set pieces that they've already thought of and i think in some
cases maybe even shot like they shoot them and then they have Simon Pegg do something to make it make sense. You know?
I think that this, at every moment, is a film that is directed by a stunt guy
and stars a stunt guy. Later on in this series, we'll cover a movie where Burt Reynolds essentially plays himself.
That's actually a little bit sad.
But Hal Needham directs this film.
He's a legendary stunt guy.
Burt Reynolds has stunt experience.
He was close friends with Hal Needham.
And I really think that this is an excuse to do stunts that just happened to blunder into the extraordinary talents of
Burt Reynolds, Sally Fields, and Jackie Gleason.
And the dumb son.
Yeah.
I mean, it's not like the jokes are good.
Like the jokes wouldn't be funny if these geniuses weren't doing.
Yeah.
There's some like, there's some like fun kind of pattery writing in it.
But yeah, for the most part, it's like all vibe and delivery but don't you need like the symmetry and the
ridiculousness like you were talking about buford's you know vaudevillian delivery and how that comedy
works but i don't think it works as well if this if the action set pieces aren't as super heroic as they are, right?
Like, if you had Buford T. Justice chasing after the driver from Drive,
like, tonally, it's a mismatch there.
You need it ridiculous all the way through.
I think that's why this works.
And the other symmetry there is that
every time Jackie Gleason does his ridiculous bloviating,
Burt Reynolds' response is to just kind of look askance. Just get a little grin on his face
and shoot his eyes to the corner and then peel out. And every fucking time, it's great. It works
for me every time. I get excited every time I see an e-brake turn in this movie man there's so many
and they're so great there's so many flat spots on that tire so we kind of leave the we leave the
sheriff for a little bit to kind of concentrate on the burt reynolds sally field relationship
yeah which leads to kind of thing what i think is the actual best moment in the movie or my
favorite moment in the movie i should say sally field is
kind of like talking about the like all the jobs that she's tried and she's you know but she's been
a model she's been a you know she's been a dancer she says she was on broadway for 12 minutes and
she's kind of like trying to tell burt reynolds about broadway stuff which is kind of hilarious
like what about this guy makes you think that he's interested in musicals yeah you know she's kind
of just going on and she's like you know who i think is really revolutionizing the theater is
stephen sondheim and burt reynolds just with a mouthful of gum just goes yeah yeah who's that
it like says everything about the characters it is just a a perfect moment. It is her being a tryhard. It is him
just kind of being hilariously blasé. That's the moment that is why this movie works for me.
It's so great. It's kind of sweet how he doesn't shut her down, though, either.
Yeah, it is. He's trying, you know? He doesn't make her feel stupid ever for her interests.
It's just clear that they don't have that compatibility.
Yeah.
He goes, who's that?
And she says, Stephen Sondheim?
And then he says, does he do a lot of musicals and stuff?
Yeah.
And she says, yeah.
And then he asks her if she's ever done anything with Brenda Lee.
Right.
The, like, rockabilly singer Brenda Lee. Right. The rockabilly singer Brenda Lee. So this bit of the movie,
I think really, really works. It's like they pull over because I think the dog needs a bath or
something. So they pull over and just kind of hang out in a meadow. And yeah, and they kind of like
come to the realization that like they're from these two different worlds. She asked him if he
likes elton
john he says he's never heard of him it kind of made me wonder about like oh i wonder what this
reference meant at the time was like elton john hipster shit you know i guess it probably was
maybe it was sort of like city shit yeah like it was like i don't know if elton john was ever like
hip hip i think he was always elton john to some extent but like his gay urbanity even in his
middle of the roadness i think would be a like a direct contrast to the the brindleys of the world
so they they decide that they're from two different worlds but the you know the attraction is just too
powerful i don't think they kiss here. Like he puts his
hat on her and they kind of walk away together. Is there an actual kiss? Did I, did I miss it?
I remember there being a kiss with two hands and in a two hander of a movie,
that's what I thought that you were referring to, but there's like the clutch, this clutching of
the face. Yeah. I've never held someone's face like that to kiss them.
In that same interview, I believe it might've been in Sally Field's autobiography, but
she does describe that when they dated, he would grab her face like that. Like that is a real thing
that I just read her talking about with Burt Reynolds, that like when they would meet a man
from her past, whether it was someone
she had dated or someone who was just her friend, he would grasp her face like that.
Let's call it Macaulay Culkin style, but nonviolently and then be like, well, who,
who is he? And what is he to you? This is not a bit. This is not a bit. No, this is 100%,
100% for real. I have a question for you guys. As horny boys.
Yes.
I think Adam and I are famous for our horniness.
Sure.
Sally Field was almost not cast in this film.
The studio was opposed to her casting because she wasn't sexy enough.
Now, there are some bodacious, sexy babes in this movie.
There's a woman whose name is Hot Pants, for example.
And obviously, that's not Sally Field's shtick.
But since we've discussed horniness for Burt Reynolds a lot in this program,
describe for me your relative horniness for the great Sally Field.
I'll start. Extremely horny. Yeah. I think
part of it is a little bit of a trick because you have other people commenting on how hot Sally
Field is in the movie. And I think that helps. And also every other woman in this movie who isn't
Sally Field looks like Vanessa Bayer playing an SNL character.
Yeah, that's fair. I like even like there's a running joke in the movie that she is teaching herself to smoke cigarettes. Yes, have a smoke. It seems to help.
I love that scene. And every time she has like a cigarette in her mouth and she's not quite sure
what to do with it, I am like rolling on the floor immensely
charmed and just like god i would love to kiss with that lady yeah i i again i think i think we
talked about it up top but yeah that she i think i grew up watching her play moms and oh is she the
like scoldy mom and mrs doubtfire i think I think she is, right? Oh, yeah. Anyway. Good pull.
Yeah, a classic, classic stick in the mud.
Going back and seeing
her in these movies is I'm like,
oh, yeah, great. Yeah, she was
a pretty legendary 70s babe.
And yeah, she's, you know, she's dressed
pretty tastefully in this, but I think
with other movies in this series, we will see
her in a lot of hot pants, etc.
And yeah, she's one of the all-timers.
Jerry Reid, by the way, legendary guitar player.
Like, singer of great semi-novelty country songs.
I was just talking with Daniel before the recording about how much I love the song
When You're Hot, You're Hot hot which is like a gambling crime narrative that like borders on like shaft
level 1970s goofy pop guitarness but like jerry reed like one of the greatest country guitarists
of all time if not the greatest and And wrote Eastbound and Down, right?
He did.
He wrote, yeah, The Man.
The Man was a powerful entertainer.
So yeah, actually, it was actually during this scene, them kind of cavorting around
in the woods, we get the third song about the bandit.
I call you the bandit, an outlaw on the chain shackles only five feet up you wear no man's chain
this is about what a fuck machine he is um it's okay i mean no eastbound and down of course but yeah so i think
this is my second favorite song about the bandit but explicitly like lyrics about not doing oral
right yeah he says it's unclean yeah wait this song is called bandit don't eat fish
wet mustache and in parentheses but not from from that. Right. It's Coors Light, I swear. That's why my mustache is wet.
All the Coors Light I drink.
To me, Eastbound and Down stands with the greatest songs in movie history. It's Rainbow
Connection level song. Absolutely.
The rest of them bottom out at A minus. I think that these are all fucking delightful.
Yeah. Across these movies, the song about the main character always fucking rules.
But obviously, Eastbound and Down is the greatest of all time.
And I think they speak to a great strength of country music, which is they are goofy
which is they are goofy on purpose. Like there is an on purpose goofiness to them.
That is part of what makes them great.
And they are also great on their just straight ahead merit.
Like they are both of those things at the same time.
It's no problem for them.
It's not sweaty at all.
They're fucking funny and delightful in addition to being jams. And all three of those
lanes coexist perfectly. So that's the last like thing that happens in the movie or the last like
kind of important beat in the movie for the, you know, remaining half hour or so. It's it's it's a
lot of car chasing. We see a lot of CB radio enthusiasts coming to's it's a lot of car chasing we see a lot of cb radio enthusiasts
coming to their aid a lot of fun characters in that the babe known as hot pants jesse you
mentioned there's some sort of mobile prostitute wagon that helps them out some sort of like
prostitute rv did you guys were you guys able to make heidner hair of this? That was neat. Yeah, there were some cool prostitutes who agreed to waylay the cops.
This is Foxy Lady Bandit.
We heard you were coming by and we decided we'd take care of those bears for you.
You know, a little personalized service.
And did a great job.
Buford T. Justice tries to arrest someone he found in the prostitute trailer, but it turns out to be a cop.
And he says that he should be wearing a badge on his dick.
It's a lot of fun.
As a car fan, I'm not look, there's going to be a lot of people listening to this who are like true car nuts, like people who can identify every car and say, oh, that's a 76.
That's a, you know, like,
like our friend, Adam Pranica with airplanes or whatever. I can't, I'm not that guy, but I will
say that there's a scene where, where hot pants is working at like a, like a drive-in burger joint,
basically like a classic Americana drive-in burger joint. And the bandit catches her on the CB.
They're old friends.
It suggests that they like to fuck much to Sally Fields dismay.
Back when he used to do oral.
Yeah.
Back in the oral sex days.
Exactly.
That's why I grew the stash.
It's an oral blocker.
Do not pass.
She agrees to lead a group of customers from this place out onto the freeway
to inconvenience the many many cop cars that are following them at this point and like
sort of you know sort of ace them out right and it is the fucking coolest parade of trucks
like personal trolley pickup trucks and shit, like a fucking
awesome Bronco. And maybe it was an international scout, like just a fucking parade of great trucks
of the 1970s. Like I'm not even into a truck and there's like eight different awesome trucks.
And it's clear that they were just like, they just had a brainstorming meeting.
What's 12 different awesome trucks we could have?
And they just threw them all in this scene.
Yeah, so that's kind of the climax of the movie.
They pull into Atlanta with one minute to spare.
It's some sort of stock car race, I think.
Big Enos and Little Enos are there.
They deliver the beer. And they say,
How about double or nothing?
How about forget it?
Oh, wait a minute.
What about double or nothing?
You went up to Boston
and bring back some clam chowder
for me and my daddy?
He throws them the keys to a Cadillac,
like a classic, you know,
Crystal Palace, Buck Owens Cadillac
with horns on the front.
And they taunt the sheriff one last time.
And the chase is on yet again we get one more line from the dumb son i think it's don't leave me who's gonna hold your hat
fucking slams into east mountain down one more time roll credits everybody's loving their life
yeah that's smoky and the bandit uh i i have not
seen smoky and the bandit 2 we will be watching it later for this series i hope it just picks up
where that leaves off and it's about chowder obtaining chowder want to see the bandit run
up against some boston assholes that's probably going to be a lot of fun. Yeah. So let's go around because we're,
let's say, paying tribute to the Great Max Fun Podcast, The Flophouse, with this format. And
by paying tribute, I mean we're just stealing it. We're going to go around the horn and say,
is this a good bad movie, a bad bad movie, or a movie you liked. I'll go ahead and go first. This is a
movie I like. It's a ton of fun. It's obviously kind of a popcorn movie classic. The music's
great. Everybody is doing their best version of themselves in this movie, I think I can say.
Yeah, it's the platonic ideal. You really understand why they tried to do this so many
other times with varying degrees of success just because it
absolutely fucking rules uh smoking the bandit it's a treat if you haven't seen it do yourself
solid adam what'd you think i really liked it too it's so unusual to watch a movie now where like
the entire culture is so uniformly anti-police,
anti-authority.
Like, I love that feeling.
And like, there's something so,
like the stakes are so low in this movie throughout.
It's fun for the entire hour and a half for that reason.
Like there are 200 police officers in this movie
and yet I never feel like our characters are in any danger.
It's just,
it's so fun like that.
And,
I mean,
fucking Reynolds.
He's so charismatic.
He's so beautiful as a man.
Even though he doesn't do oral.
We don't know.
That's just the theory I had.
Listen,
I think we're taking this burt doesn't do
oral burt didn't do oral thing as a fact well he's dead he can't speak for himself that's true
anymore he's not doing oral in hell right now he grew that itchy ass mustache so no one would want
oral from him maybe his version of hell is just assembly line oral for eternity. Right.
I want to be clear that I have a soft and silky mustache now that I've said that.
All right.
Thank you.
Now, I liked it a lot, and I'm glad that I was made to watch this movie because it's been like 20 years since I have.
I really want to see the sequel, though, also.
I was sincere about that.
I will be very disappointed if the next film does not begin exactly
where this ends up.
Adam,
we have a guest booked for Smokey too,
but if they can't,
if they cancel,
you're the first guy we're calling.
Okay.
And also you could just watch it.
Like that's also an option that's available to you.
I don't watch anything that I don't have to then recap on a podcast.
Why would you watch something if you didn't recap it on a podcast later?
I have 74 Star Treks to watch.
Yeah, there's a lot of Star Treks now, aren't there?
Yeah.
Jesse, it's your turn.
What do you think?
Years ago, my old producer, Julia Smith, wonderful woman, told me that often she wanted to watch like an art film.
And her lovely husband, Adam, who's not this Adam, but a different Adam and is a great guy
and very artsy himself, a professional musician. He just would always just want to watch Smokey
and the Bandit again. And I had not at the to watch Smokey and the Bandit again.
And I had not at the time seen Smokey and the Bandit. You will hear me say on this show many times that like, I came to Burt Reynolds very late in life because of just where we hit and,
you know, my fundamental NPR-iness. Most women don't come at all.
Yeah. Thank you. Not with old Burt.
and don't come at all.
Yeah, thank you.
Not with old Bert.
So I went out and watched this.
This was like the inciting incident for me to watch Smokey and the Bandit.
I was like, well, I like that Adam guy.
This guy's one of the fucking Yo Gabba Gabbas.
I should find out why he likes this movie so much.
I watched it and like,
as an adult, it is rare for a movie to rocket into your pantheon. Like your pantheon is generally established between the ages of 12 and 21. The end, right? This movie immediately became like one of my, I don't know, 15 favorite movies of all time.
I don't know, 15 favorite movies of all time. Like I was like, this is the fucking funnest shit in the history of the world. Burt Reynolds is the greatest actor of all time. All movies
should have nothing happened and no jokes. Just like a lot of emergency brake turns as I am
identified and just fucking Sally Field is the most delightful and beautiful woman in the history
of the world. Like I was completely sold on it. 100% movie. I loved I'm upgrading it from kind of liked a movie. I absolutely love
just a joy. I mean, once in a while, I imagine what if there were
like legit good jokes in this movie, like real great jokes, then that's the only thing that
could make it better.
They say fun things and nothing could be more fun than to see Sally Field and Burt Reynolds and so forth say fun things. But like, it's pretty close to a perfect, just no character development,
fucking no emotional anything. It's the right amount of it you know i think again in other
movies we will see they take these swings at like melodrama that just you know for the most part
absolutely eat shit yeah in a every fast andious movie, there's just fucking two serious scenes that
make me want to put my face through a window. No one is equipped to do them. No one-
No one involved is equipped to write them. Yeah.
None of the directors are equipped to direct them.
Yeah. It is just like, it is nice that this movie, like,
it is punching exactly at its perfect weight class and knocks it out.
It knows what it is. There's a moment where Burt Reynolds messes up a little and he says,
oh man, I seen him do it in movies. And there's another part where Jackie Gleason
is in traffic and he goes, what the hell is this? A drive-in
movie? And you're like, yeah, it is, buddy. It's the best one ever. Did he spike the camera when
he turned the lights out to flee that first police officer that was chasing him at night and he kills
the lights and he parks behind that building and then he coasts past the camera? Does he look at
the camera in that scene? I thought for sure he did the camera does he look at the camera in that
scene i thought for sure he did fucking he looks at the camera 7 000 times in every movie and it's
great every time that's what i'm saying that that is a that's a fun genre thing that he gets away
with because he's burt reynolds yeah i think it has diminishing returns i think it works in this
movie and yeah drives me a little up a wall in other movies.
And again, because this was the first one.
Smoking the Bandit 2 is basically The Office with how much of that there is, right?
Yeah. A lot of Jim in the camera.
Well, yeah, we have a couple of categories that we like to talk about when we talk about
Burt Reynolds movies.
Horniest moment. Now, overall, the man has a pretty horny filmography. The sexuality in this movie is pretty PG-13. Was there any notable horniness that we didn't address?
Yeah. The horniest moment in this scene by far is Sally Field field asks burt reynolds do you ever take that hat off he says i took it off for
one thing and one thing only then they go for a little walk and then there's a scene moments later
where burt reynolds hat is hanging from his CB antenna, which means that they have fucked.
A very phallic CB antenna.
Yeah.
Very, very long flapper.
It's as horny as you could possibly get in a scene that is exclusively depicting headgear and electronic equipment.
Like communications device.
And fucking in a car that was not made for it.
No. One of the best things about this movie that is very horny in a Quentin Tarantino type way
is that Sally Field just makes so much hay of that passenger seat. Like she flaps and flops all over there.
She is sometimes you're like, is she fully upside?
Like, is her head in the footwell and her feet are up out of the T-top?
You can tell all the dialogues looped because you'd be hearing nothing but vinyl seat squeak
the entire drive.
But yeah, extreme horniness involving him hanging his hat from the CB antenna.
So we are going to end this podcast, every episode by Jesse reading a letter out of a
book of letters that were supposedly written to Burt Reynolds from fans. These were books that
were actually published in the 70s or 80s that people read when they needed to
masturbate, I guess. Hard to say why these were published, but they were and they're a ton of fun.
But before we get to the letter, Adam, thank you so much for joining us.
Thank you so much for having me. I really enjoyed this. Do I get to stick around to
listen to the letter?
But I would like for you to, before Jesse reads the letter, tell the listeners about your podcast. Oh, right. Yeah. I have two podcasts on the Great Maximum
Fun Network. One of them is about old Star Trek episodes called The Greatest Generation
and a Star Trek podcast about new Star Trek episodes called Greatest Trek.
They're a delight. Our regular Jordan Jesse girlfriend, Ben Harrison, is Adam's co-host.
Right. I should have mentioned that. But he refused to do this episode about a Burt Reynolds movie. His basement is flooding, Adam. You know that. And I know he's got a baby and his basement is
flooding right now. Right. Oh my God. You know who else's basement got flooded this episode?
Sally Field. That's right. Thank you very much.
Although that's not why Burt Reynolds'
mustache is wet. Yeah.
Not at all. We got to the bottom of that. It's from Coors.
God damn it. It is from Coors.
Thanks for having me, guys. Yeah. I really appreciate it. This is fun. But yes, but
please, Jesse, take it away.
Here's a letter from Strange Lulu
in Philadelphia.
Dear Burt, you'll never guess what my hobby is.
Blush, blush.
I collect hair, men's hair.
But just hair from a certain region of the body, not the head or arms or chest or legs or whiskers or mustache.
Do I make myself clear? Now, I usually get this hair just off guys
I've been in the hay with and really dig. I snip off a little hunk or a curl and put it in an
envelope and write the guy's name on it. In my old age, these envelopes will be the souvenirs of many happy occasions. Ha! Bert, I know the chances
are slim I'll ever meet you, let alone getting in the hay with you, but I'd love to add you to my
collection. How about it? Couldn't you please, please snip a little locket from down below and ship it on to me.
I'd love you until I died.
I'm a real hair crazy.
Jesus Christ.
Could you imagine going through grandma's things,
finding the accountant style accordion folder full of envelopes and pawing through them. You put on a green visor and some sleeve garters and get to work.
Here's grandma's old brooches.
What's in here?
You're counting it up with the fucking pocket calculator that's mounted inside Jerry Reed's
truck cab.
Our producer is Daniel Zafran.
The theme music for Stash Rules Everything Around Me
made by the great Von P of the rap group Tanya Morgan.
You can check out Tanya Morgan's records.
Check out Von P on social media at V-O-N-P-E-A.
Our thanks to Pete the Retailer
for coming up with the title for this episode.
Thank you so much for tuning in to Stash Rules Everything Around Me. And thank you so much for
being a Max Fund donor. We'll be coming at you with lots more Burt's. So stay tuned.
We hope that you enjoyed that episode of Stash Rules Everything Around Me. I know that we
certainly did. Yes. So we have a lot of other Burt Reynolds movies for you as part of this series.
Again, they are The Best Little Whorehouse in Texas, Gator, Hooper, The Cannonball Run,
and Smokey and the Bandit 2. Are they as good as Smokey
and the Bandit 1? No. Only time will tell, but the answer is no.
They were a blast to watch and a blast to talk about with some of our favorite people.
Yeah, and we want to keep doing stuff like this. So if you go to MaximumFun.org
slash join, you can keep the show coming. You can keep cool
projects coming and get yourself some fun thank you gifts and a ton, ton, ton of bonus content.
This whole series was made possible by MaxFun members, not just Jordan Jesse Go, but
Stash Rules Everything Around Me. We couldn't have done it without the producer hours. We were able to add when we hired Daniel to produce the program. We've got lots of cool other projects that we are
working on for this coming year. And we're able to do that kind of stuff because of your direct
support. It is unusual, Jordan. It is unusual for a podcast to be directly supported like this. It's especially
unusual for us to give away so much of the show and then come back afterwards and say,
hey, was that worth paying for? But that's exactly what we do at Maximum Fun.
So if you think this show is worth paying for, just like your newspaper subscription is,
newspaper subscription is or your subscription to Hulu plus your subscription to your PBS Living add-on to Amazon Prime. That's the one. I got that one because they got Julia Child on there.
Then just go to MaximumFun.org slash join. Five bucks a month is probably manageable for you.
If you got more, you can join at higher levels. But the thing that
makes a big difference to us is that you become a member. It is easy. Will you become a member
at MaximumFun.org? Please do. I'll hug you and kiss you and love you.
love you