Juicy Scoop with Heather McDonald - Selena Gomez, Jessica Simpson with Justin Martindale
Episode Date: November 8, 2022I’m live in Boston, Philly, and DC! Get tickets at heathermcdonald.net Justin and I are back from our Texas Live shows, and we have so much Juicy Scoop to discuss. There was a protester at my sho...w. I had a scary hotel situation go viral. A woman was thrown out of my show, and we went to the Round Up. Selena Gomez is taking heat for her latest friend announcement. Kris Jenner had a birthday and did not invite me. Jessica Simpson claps back to comments about her appearance and speech. Cher is dating Amber Rose’s ex-baby daddy. Aaron Carter passed away. Britney’s IG is crazier than before. Rebel Wilson is now a married gay mom. Sister Wives freak out about the future of their family and show. RHSLC re-cap involves a 50 yr old troll. Get extra juice on Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/juicyscoop https://heathermcdonald.net/ Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices
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Head of McDonald has got the Choo Six Scoop.
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Woo-hoo, and a McDonald.
Juicy scoop.
Hello and welcome to Juicy scoop.
I have the comedic legend tall to light, fabulous hair.
We are back from Texas.
Welcome back.
Yeah.
Justin Martindale, thank you for coming in.
Thank you. After Martindale. Thank you for coming in. Thank you.
After a whirlwind. A whirlwind of Texas.
Fun. We went to Houston and then we did two shows in Dallas. All were sold out and they were so fun.
Here we are. If you guys are watching this on the YouTube, subscribe. I'm just a few thousand away
from 100,000. When I get a hundred thousand there's gonna be a big things that happened
only fans yes
that
that
that you don't know
uh... anyway we had so for the list let's go through the weekend
first exciting part is when i was walking on the plane with you guys on a
way to Houston
we saw this cute
to see scoop or who was listening to do see scoop
i mean here she was listening as i walked in i mean made the day that was
exception right there
delight delight
and then we got we did the show in houston with truss fun
and then we got to dallas
i ended up making a tiktok that has since gone viral it has about a million now
wow and because it was an important message.
So I'm going to tell you the story which you already know, but for the people.
So we get into Dallas in the afternoon, like around 12, 30 or something.
And we're staying at a Weston, but now it's also a Marriott boy boy.
On-boy?
Yeah.
Bolly boy.
But we walked in and I immediately said, oh, this is nice.
I'm glad it's so close to the airport because you know make going leaving tomorrow easy
We check into our room. So we have three rooms and Annie and I on the sixth floor and you're on the fifth
Okay, and then we all meet now that's important to stories
So we all go downstairs and we have lunch there and then we go up and you get off at five and Annie and I get off at six
And we go into my room
which was 624 and I can say that now because I'm home in Woodland Hills.
You're room number? This is why I'm staying.
Um, so Annie and I are just going through some stuff about the show and then she leaves and I'm on the bed working on the show.
So normally every time I check into a hotel and every time I walk into my room I always
Lot do the bolt the bolt and the thing on the top always but because it was the afternoon and she just walked out
I just threw in city on the bed. I don't know how many minutes after but within
five minutes or maybe ten latest it could have been two
I really don't know but the door knocks and it was kind of an aggressive knock and it didn't sound like
Annie. Like she'd forgotten something. So I'm like yes, who is it? This guy is
like yes, I need to come in. They called me or something like that and I
immediately realized I did not double-dock it at that point. So I lock it, do
the top lock. And I'm like, no, didn't call for anything.
No, maintenance needs me to come in there.
I'm like, no, and then he's like housekeeping.
Like, it was so, maybe so nervous.
Of course.
And I said, no, I didn't, I don't need anything.
I didn't call for anything.
I don't need any house, I don't need any supplies.
No, I don't need anything.
And so I was like so scared that I wasn't even looking
through the people.
I was like standing back, talking to this guy.
And then I look in the people and I see him walking away.
And he definitely said maintenance and then he said housekeeping.
And he was, I don't think he was either,
because he wasn't, I saw the housekeeping people
and they were wearing like more like a uniform.
This guy just had like a shirt that was out and black or dark pants leaving.
And there was no kind of cart or shampoo or anything.
So, you know what I mean?
Like the car with the little shampoo.
Like do you need more supplies?
The big house keeping cart.
So then I go and I call downstairs and I say,
what happened and explain it and I said,
this is the floor I'm on, this is my room.
So please see if someone was in fact called
and if they made a mistake and let me know
because maybe I'm being whatever,
a parent, maybe I'm being or whatever.
And then after like 10, so I call, then I call Annie and I tell her the story and I'm like, make sure
you double lock your door and everything.
Now at this hotel, you did not need your key to go upstairs.
Right, you don't need the elevator.
And you can walk in and press the button and get right up.
Which I know a lot of hotels have made it that way.
This is not.
So then I'm like, you know, the only reason I knew to like call downstairs and be aware
that this was weird is because I watched a lot of TikToks on it and a lot of truth.
True crime.
Yeah, a lot of things like this.
So I did a TikTok about it and I told it and in it, I could look.
This could be a misunderstanding.
But since the time, since I put it up there, but I did tell people, always lock it,
looks at the people.
And I'm like, and also if you're a woman alone
and you do need more towels and stuff,
just say, leave it at the door.
Like you could never be to,
the comments that came in, it's almost out of million views.
The comments that came in, one person said,
I looked through the people of someone saying
they're house keeping, house keeping,
and it was a man and a woman,
and a woman was only holding a small white towel.
And people are like, is that chloroform?
I don't know.
Right.
And other people are like,
where are all these reports of people
getting kidnapped or raped or whatever?
I don't know either.
But it was weird.
They never followed up with me.
They never called it.
They never said,
oh, they never called back 10 minutes later and said,
that was, you know, Jeremy. and he meant to go to 628 he apologizes don't
mean to scare you ma'am nothing like that so then we go to the show and we have
so much fun yes and both shows great and then and because we gained an hour for
daylight savings right
we decided to go the roundup
oh yeah we had to go to the roundup
wait are we skipping the show are we gonna show is all great the show was
a great okay
you have to use on the show
yes wait you have to talk about the first show the incident
that happened
so first show i've told you guys this before that i love my audience
but sometimes these women
great too much uh... and i don't know if it's because they've been breastfeeding
for five years three different kids that's the first time this was their first
time out
they started to get for thirty when they were getting a blowout
i don't know
uh...
but sometimes they get loud.
And I had like quiet them down, I think once before.
And I think you guys, it's getting too chatty.
You know, this is not an interactive thing.
And then this, I was doing something about fashion
and like an ass thing, which I'll talk about later.
But anyway, I just said, oh, it wasn't even mean.
I wasn't even talking about anyone's specific ass.
I was saying, I don't think this is an acute fashion.
It was a keyhole skims butt cleavage.
That they're launching.
Yeah, so I'm like, now the new cleavage is butt cleavage.
Which we've talked about maybe a year or two ago,
that was gonna happen.
That's a little butt cleavage, side cleavage,
under tipped cleavage.
Everyone's just looking for the next cleavage. A next, I think it's gonna be, if I put cleavage, side cleavage, under-tip cleavage, everyone's just looking for the
next cleavage.
A next, I think it's gonna be.
Ball-sat cleavage.
No, I think it's gonna be the, well, we've already seen a little of this, but I think it's
gonna be full vagina cleavage, which is just-
Just the top.
Just the, from between your thigh and the part of the vagina, but before the slit.
Can't wait.
That part making a rave, okay?
It's gonna be a big deal so we're laughing
about it talking about it and this woman it there's two there's like a
balcony and then a regular side and she's like halfway in the middle
mm-hmm just start screaming stood up stood up and scream and said something
like you can't talk about people's asses yeah we were like what and I
right away I go all, you got to go.
And I thought, do I give her another chance?
And I'm like, no, I'm not gonna give her another chance.
I'm so sick of this shit.
We've already hushed everyone.
And she's, I can see her with a friend,
and the friend is kind of like, annoyed with her.
Stacey's single.
And then the security, I'm like, no, security please take her out.
Yep.
And so they took her out, and quickly we got back
to the fun show.
Now, I said, I'm either gonna get an email from this girl and so they took her out and quickly we got back to the fun show.
Now, I said, I'm either gonna get an email from this girl at 2am saying I'm a piece of shit
and she paid a lot of money for these tickets and I'm gonna ask and I shouldn't talk about
asses or maybe the next day she's gonna be like, I'm so sorry I was drunk because I've gotten
all of it.
So what scoop did you get?
So I had someone reach out to me, Natalie. Thank you.
And she was like, here's what happened.
This chick was sitting right next to me,
and I can tell you everything.
And so I screenshot her DM, and I was like,
I'm going to read this on the air.
Now mind you, I want to say, I think
when the woman was escorted out, her friend went with her and this is my favorite part of the story.
Her friend, once the drunk girl got past security, the friend went outside,
outside the building, outside the theater park.
Yes, the friend went and I'm going back to my seat.
That's a true, juicy scooper.
Leave your drunk best friend to fend for herself on the streets of Dallas. You finished the juicy scooper. Leave your drunk best friend to fend for herself. Yes. On the streets of
Dallas. Yes. You finished the juicy scooper. Outside of the Lovis blind theater, the Grenada
theater. So she says, this woman was belligerent before the show even started. As soon as
Heather was on stage, she knocked over the table, spilling drinks. I just want to interrupt. This was the early show. This was the first show, 7 p.m.
7 p.m.
7 p.m.
God.
She was knocked over the table, spilling drinks.
She was taking flash photos during the show,
even though Heather said wait till the end.
Now I thought I saw a couple flashes going off,
but I didn't say anything as you did it.
While she was taking photos, her phone was playing jazz music.
Like hat on, jazz on Spotify.
It was taking photos.
Okay.
She also wouldn't stop getting up, knocking into tables and grabbing everyone's chairs
to stand up.
When you all started talking about love is blind, she was screaming.
Now I think that's when we hushed everybody because there was that weird commotion.
Okay.
She got hostile when y'all were talking about ozempic, ozempic, and everyone losing weight.
She was getting mad about Jessica Simpson, and she stood up and yelled,
quit talking about people's bodies.
Now, I remember that.
Okay.
Which we weren't.
And that's when everyone started screaming
that she needed to leave.
She was waiting outside for her friend
when the show was over.
So that's what happened.
I'd really love to hear from the friend.
Oh, same.
Yes.
Yeah.
But also, it's like one of those things too,
is a performer, like you have to make that step
and be like, okay, we've got it,
someone's a, you know, interrupted.
But as for us, we were like, okay, well shit,
now we have to like reset, which is hard,
but we did it, we were like, okay,
that happened moving forward.
I mean, it's even harder when I'm in like a standup routine.
Right, oh, of course. This was a little bit easier because we just like shook it off, went to the next topic. forward. I mean, it's even harder when I'm in like a stand up routine. Right.
This was a little bit easier because we just like shook it off when to the next topic.
But yeah, I mean, it's really distracting as a performer.
And then it's like, I feel that weird, like, codependent mothery thing.
We're like, I'm like, girl, like, I want to give you another chance.
And in the past, I have with people and I've been like, stop.
But I know that everyone around her,
their experience is being severely compromised.
It's mortified.
And that's what bothers me, it's about the other people,
like, not only is it hard for me,
but it's all the other people that are like,
fucking do something.
Yeah, they're like, what's gonna happen?
Like, this is happening, and I don't like it.
And so, we're in a theater and not a comedy club,
and oftentimes the comedy clubs, they're understaffed
and they are aggressive about getting people out.
But it really had to come from me to be like, no, go buy.
Mother has spoken.
And it was kind of really empowering.
Yeah it was.
Because I'm like, I don't care that you paid.
You're like fucking annoying.
Yeah.
This is why I support women.
I will say one thing about ozempic.
Uh huh.
Okay.
I did get a long DM from someone who said,
I know you're talking about it and I know people
are talking about it, everybody's on it
and you might find like just an interesting topic.
But apparently there is such a shortage now to get it
and the people that really need it are not able to get it.
I also have got, we also heard from another juicy scupper
who took it.
And some of the drawbacks or side effects were,
you can't drink alcohol or coffee.
I'm out.
I know.
And then you're extremely thirsty all the time.
Well.
Which if you're on this drag, you're probably thirsty anyway.
Like hydrating or like insuring?
Well, I think both, but definitely hydrating.
Okay.
And the thing, now I also heard if you have any kind of thyroid issues or any kind of susceptibility
to thyroid cancer, you should definitely not go on it.
And then the last thing this guy said was, it made him really tired and like his one friend
couldn't keep up with it because he couldn't function
with his job, it was making him too exhausted.
So for me, I can't be tired.
And I'm, you know, but now I'm also thinking,
not that I was even looking into it,
but I think the thyroid thing scares me.
And then also, I don't ever wanna be responsible
for taking a drug from someone else.
Cause I was like,
cause it's a diabetes, right?
It's a diabetes, but I was like,
well, wait a minute, it's not like I'm taking insulin.
Like, isn't this kind of a new drug?
And they said, no, this is just one person.
No, it's been around for a while,
and now it's really hard to get
for that people that actually need it.
So, I thought that was kinda interesting.
Can I ask something?
Is it because I guess during lockdown people gained weight and they want to lose it fast?
Is that what it is?
No, I think that someone that they discovered that this was a side effect just much like
when Latisse, which made your eyelashes grow, that came from helping older people with
glaucoma.
Oh, okay.
And that's when they realized, oh my god, there's something in this that makes eyelashes grow.
So I think they originally made it just for diabetic people and then realized this was
something.
It's a side effect.
And for some people, they can take it and just lose weight and they don't have diabetes
and they don't get sick and nothing happens.
For now, who knows long term, but of course they have all those warnings at the end.
So I think that's kind of what happened. I think then people were tuned into it and even though you
need the insurance you need to be diagnosed to get it for insurance or a discount. There's
enough people that are happy to pay a couple grand a month to lose 12 pounds. God I wish I had
that discipline and that bank account. But there you go. So, um, okay, so then I found out before I went to my Dallas show that I had my first
protester.
Aren't you excited?
Yes.
Yes.
This was sent to me.
And it says repent to Jesus with a juicy scoop pink poster.
I kind of, okay, as much as I want to make this about me, I think there's a chance that he's just telling
everyone to repent and not just Heather McDonald.
I think let's just keep it in your head that it was just because you're Heather McDonald.
And because Jesus flipped me when I fell.
Yes, but I also think that there's a group of guys who do this for women, for women performers.
Someone said in the thread or something
that they're like, if there's ever a female performer,
a headliner, they go and they call them whores
and all this stuff and,
Dr. Dr. Garwin, yeah.
And I guess you know, he couldn't get a group
of friends within that day and he said,
you know what, I'm gonna go solo on this.
I think I can carry it.
And the police took him away.
Apparently he said, if you go to the show,
you're going to have.
Oh, he did tell it.
Oh, yeah, he told you to do this first.
And he said he was telling juicy scupers that they walked in with their, oh my God, everyone
was dressed to the 90s by the way.
So good.
Dallas, I mean, every, all my juice scupers look gorgeous.
She said it was amazing.
But the Dallas people, they all had the best hair.
They all had great bags.
She all had like really good outfits.
Rolls, Royces, all.
Lots of cute cowboy boots. Yes. Like short boots, high boots. Just really
put together. Can I say that the men to the men that were there, like had their hair
on point, I felt very represented. Yes. It was very nice. And delightful husbands that thoroughly
enjoyed it. Straight husbands and gay husbands. So they all loved it.
So again, I guess they were saying, okay, it was about me.
Good.
And then also, I've made it into a, my viral video has made it into a couple political ads
where they were like, you know, this is what the other person did.
They insisted on vaccines. And then they just show me falling.
What was the movie called?
Well, the movie is called Sudden Death
and that's about the vaccines.
And I'm featured in that along with a bunch of other people
that have been caught feigning on film,
which is interesting.
You did first, you did it first.
You started the trend.
And the other one is just this up this governor's ad from
Iowa yeah no I used Idaho it was Idaho we've been saying Iowa I said Idaho and
you corrected me and it was wrong and it was Idaho I'm anyway um anyway Peter said
should we copyright that video and I said no I just I like to be on TV just
anybody that wants to even have a three-faint hands eyes going back and I say okay so we had that
happened then we go to the roundup and you know we had some very powerful
Texan friends Kelly and Kim and there was a long line and they're very
confident that I'm a lot more famous than I am. And they're like, it shouldn't be a problem.
And it was until I think they paid them.
They sure did.
They were like, we're the lesbian mayors of this town.
We've got you guys.
My friend even had like a mayor hat on.
She looks cute.
They were awesome.
So then we go and we decide to go to the karaoke spot.
I mean, first of all, the brown, I remember going to the roundup,
which was made famous by Leigh Ann from Housewives of Dallas,
but I remember when I lived in Dallas,
the roundup was like a country bar saloon.
We walked in there and it was like,
Marty Grau.
It was like,
I doubt it.
I don't know if it was cause of daylight savings,
the extra hour, but it was.
I don't know, and she ran into us good.
So we go to the back,
karaoke bar, yes.
Oh, we just remind people of Leighon lock-in was a real house as a
talus and i think that show though i liked a lot of the girls was pretty
boring as it as like a four-season show
but the greatest moment was when leon lock-in was high on
uh...
not drugs but that to get her breast fixed case so she was on anesthesia
i think she's kind of out of it and she was miced she said to Brandy, who is one of the other cast members,
she said, I don't know why Kerry always comes for me. You know, her husband gets his dick sucked
at the roundup. I know the boys who did it. And that's where it became famous. And it's a big
venue. I mean, I hope she goes and gets free drink for the rest of her life. I bet she does
She asked you. I mean, it was the best publicity. I love that club and the staff was
Wonderful and yeah, we had a good time and anyway
Allegedly that's what she said and there was no proof of it and I've met Carrie Duber and her husband and I don't know
Anybody that did suck his dick at the round of I don't
Okay, just saying that's what I can see. I do, no, I'm just kidding, I don't.
So here I am pulling you Kathy Hilton,
trying to tell the host of the karaoke that I'd like to say.
And I'm like, do I have to wait in the long line?
Like I'm a little bit famous.
I mean, what a thirst trap that I just did two entire shows,
two meet and greets.
And I'm like, I think I still have a song in me. Mind you, can I just say we had been in
this room for maybe five minutes. Yeah. You what we walked in and we're like, oh, karaoke.
All right. Yeah. Yeah. And so then I went and I did my classic, I've written about it in
my books. I've told you it's Bonnie Rae
Let's give them something to talk about I'm gonna try a new song when I'm at the fucking round up
So here I am look at you
You got tipped I didn't get tipped
Yeah, this guy gave me a couple dollars. I put them on my spanks. He for you
Yeah, this guy gave me a couple dollars. I put him in my spanks. He's for you
Just amazing Here we are just having fun as the night goes on and then
Justin was gonna be part of this too
Wait, oh no, oh, I did not want to do this. I remember this. Oh, no, no, I definitely did not want to do this. I remember this.
No.
No, I definitely didn't want to do it.
If you guys are watching this on YouTube, Justin's been so shy right now and he's definitely
not wanting to participate.
No, you did it.
No, you did it.
No, you did it.
I was like, it reminds me of like an anthem, you know, and I was like, oh, I don't want
to do this.
I feel like it was a little too gay for you.
What's just why in C.A. is like the movie. i don't want to do this you know what's your sierra
so anyway we uh... had a lot of fun
then uh...
went to kelly
and kim's house had another drink which you probably could have a bit of that
then i come back to the
hotel at three
and the man is in your room at this note
and i did not have my
uh...
oh my god
the drama i'm trying to look over it.
I'm like, no big deal, right?
Here's my D, 624, I'm gonna get my key card.
This woman was like, I can't help you.
I go, what do you mean?
She's like, well, it's gonna be about 35 to 45 minutes
to get your key.
I'm like, how is this possible?
You're a huge corporation, it's 2022.
There's gotta be people coming home that don't,
I mean, we one thing about had no ID.
What time it was like three in the morning.
I had the credit card that played for,
I just was like, and she was like, sorry, no.
So, just it was like, just come into my room
and I have two beds and you can sleep.
I'm like, no, I wanna watch my face like, this is ridiculous. So then we did a tick talk about that.
Pretty buzz annoyed and then she called up for about 20 minutes and was able to
get us our key. But then when I checked out I told the person I go look it's not
her fault. It's not your fault. Like but this is crazy. Like what what what if I
didn't have Justin I was just gonna like lay like land accounts at three a.m. for forty five minutes
like
there should be a way to
to do a key at all hours
and and then i also said and did you
i want to tell you about my viral tiktok yeah
she's like there was a stranger that also try to get into my room that day
so what's going on on the way
yeah we don't know
and i don't know nobody i get it, no, nobody, I get it.
Like, I know you got, it's not your problem,
but you might want to tell your manager
to then tell other people that these things happened
because they might get back to them
since this video's going viral.
And I made very clear where, what hotel it was
and where it was.
I've never seen you more mad.
I was scared.
I got scared. Not for, I got scared because for the lady, because the lady was just like, man, there mad. I was pissed. I got scared.
Not for, I got scared because for the lady,
because the lady was just like, man,
there's nothing I can do.
And you're like, you know what?
Fuck this.
I paid for this fucking, and I was like,
oh shit, she's mad.
I'd like, and I can, and I can,
I can, and I can, and I can,
I go, I know it's not your fault.
Like, you've been trained to do this.
But I'm saying, you know what?
It's not right though.
Because then we got back to my room,
and we're doing the TikTok and the phone ring.
And we hadn't been there.
I don't think for 20 minutes.
So how she was able to do it.
She's like, okay, I'm gonna come,
I'm gonna come and let you in.
I'm like, why didn't we do this from the beginning?
Anyway.
So anyway, we love to travel.
And I love when I come and the shows are sold out,
but part of being a performer is you book your
shows and then you let people know on your podcast or whatever that I'm coming to this
place in a few weeks.
I won't you please buy a ticket because I'd like to come.
And I came across another comedian who lives just on the street for me with any comings.
And I didn't think this was very nice what she said about the Oxenard Club, which is who lives just on the street for me uh... Whitney Cummings and uh...
i didn't think this was very nice what she said about the oxard club which is a
beautiful club very new
levity livin a beautiful square in oxard and oxard is
uh...
kind of between l.a. and san obar bra
past like uh... thousand oaks
and it is beautiful and
this is like a little bit inland but you go and
you're right there at the beautiful Hollywood beach. It's called Hollywood Beach, million, million
dollar homes, okay, at the beach. But for whatever reason, when he comes, it didn't seem very excited
to go there. And this is what she recorded.
And to Oxnard on December 8th, 9th and 10th, to levity live.
Now, you're already pushing, like, I'm already coming to Oxnard.
The fact that I have to like promote it and tell everyone is so fucking embarrassing.
If we don't sell this out in the next 24 hours, how about this? I'm just canceling.
This is already so beneath me to even be fucking coming
to wherever the fuck this fucking wasteland
of a hellhole.
How dare it, why am I even reading this?
This is sick.
This is sickening, I'm sick, you make me sick.
Where even is Oxnard?
Santa Barbara.
It's in, it's like north of Santa Barbara. If I come to Santa Barbara, if where even is Oxnard Santa Barbara. It's in it's like north of Santa Barbara
If I come to Santa Barbara if I come to Oxnard and there's not a line
Seven fucking miles long down the street. I will set this entire state on fucking fire. I hope I'm being clear
We good
Yeah, good Well now as a native Californian I'm being clear. We good? Yeah. Good.
Well, now, as a native Californian, as a native one, I tell you to die.
As someone who's lived your whole life, unlike Whitney, she came from the East Coast.
I didn't like this Whitney.
This is not the Whitney I like.
I know she's trying to be funny.
I think it's really rude to people that live in Oxard.
It's making like, it's being very elitist.
You joke about fires, okay?
When we have the worst fire situation ever.
Setting fires.
Setting fires.
And you put down a area of town, which is very nice.
And also has working people as well as wealthy people
that all came have come to
the show the theater is beautiful
great food i'd love to perform in the past
and
it's just it's so elitist and it's so great i get it
you you are
of a higher level then maybe comics that you feel have to say hey come to my
show
but you know people can't pay for gas
and christmas is around the corner and maybe the tickers were going as fast as
previous times but like not a great idea so anyway i'm like
i don't know but i saved it because i wanted to talk about it as a native
californian who loves my at all the cities that are involved in this state
and i didn't like it and uh... i didn't appreciate it
now if she was joking she's i think she sent to cut down
she took it down uh... i i couldn't find it
i couldn't find it so i think someone said hey
if this was a joke
somethings don't hit
but talking about
start setting the path of the gunfire and ripping on account
and it's not north of Santa Barbara.
You don't know that because you're not from California.
It is south of Santa Barbara and it's great club.
And there's a Larson's you can eat at three four.
And there's a yard house that you can eat at before.
And I would love to go back and I know I can
because they're very happy with the times I've been there.
So and when i go there
yes i will invite people to come and ask people to come and whoever comes
i will be grateful that you bother to come
so what we're saying is oxenard heather and i will be doing juicy scoop live
one day problem i would love to get in my car and drive forty eight minutes
two i just couldn't imagine that i i love coming on planes and seeing you guys in Texas too
But like it's so convenient. It's so great. It's so easy. I don't know. It's so weird too because it's just like what how
So do you think by shitting on the town people are gonna be like you know what let's go? Yeah
I can't be like yeah
I live in bum fuck Oxnard. Yeah, I will go.
Like, you know, I don't think it was a great, it wasn't a great move.
It's not cute.
But you know, she is so famous, which is why I'm able to talk about it.
Okay, so speaking of famous people, this is a real juicy topic that Justin and I have
discussed before on the show. Selena Gomez said that Taylor Swift is her only friend
in Hollywood.
I never fit in with a cool group of girls
that were celebrities.
Now, do you guys remember when I was walking through
Galston's and I saw a cover of a magazine
about a year ago and it was Selena Gomez saying
my best friend, she did a photo shoot with my best
friend and I said I wonder if this girl she's claiming is her best friend is the
one who gave her her Francia Riza if it was Francia Riza who gave her her kidney
let her have her kidney because Selena Gomez suffers from leopus and needed a kidney transplant so
But it wasn't and I we and I talked about it and I said
I'm sorry
I think if you gave someone your kidney
You can have other friends, but you should be the best friend like you should be the B fry
And they should be the S-DAN on the little heart necklace charm that I would think when blood is going through their kidney inside of your body that should
constitute a great friend.
However, little side note, you know, my other favorite story, you know, who also gave
their husband a kidney.
George Lopez's wife gave him the kidney and then he divorced her
oh and now he has a new show with his daughter
low piz versus low piz coming out you're welcome and
just gave you a shout out hope that kidneys working out for
you anyway so so we talk about it yes and that night
something very scary happened for you and me
the bots came after us. Oh right.
Maybe not the bots, maybe real fans.
They came after me how dare I say anything
they were about Selena Gomez.
Which we did.
I did a, the TikTok was going viral.
It was just us talking about it from the show.
I had to take it down.
Justin, you had to go on hiding.
I had to go into hiding.
People were like kill yourself.
Yes.
Take a bath with a toaster.
And it was like, I'm on it, relax.
So many
rat and snake emojis everywhere. And crazy, terrifying. And I was like, yeah, you're right.
You fucking scared me. Well, now I'm not worried about talking about it. And let's see. Let's
see if Elon Musk has cleaned out the bots. Let's see what I post on Twitter. What reaction
I get? Because I kind of want to see if it's true.
So, yeah, what happened?
So, she left, she has a new movie out and she did not.
She has a documentary about her being bipolar, which I've not seen.
It just came out like while we were in Dallas, yeah.
And it's very talented, very beautiful.
But people talk about this friendship thing.
Now other people, Selena Gomez fans are saying, well, she just meant that her only famous singer
friend, well celebrity friend, this girl's an actress.
So they said, well, she's an actress, maybe she meant my only famous singer.
Okay, she said her direct quote was, she's my only famous friend in the industry. That is my real friend.
My only friend in the industry is Taylor Swift.
Now this girl is in the industry.
Now if she was a roofer, I would say, all right, your statement's okay.
Because your famous, your industry friend, but entertainment industry is what people refer
to industry.
They don't think dancing industry. You say, yeah.
When you talk about the industry in LA,
it's entertainment, which includes every asset of entertainment.
So yeah, I don't know what I would love to get this girl on.
Have her come on, Francia, Raza, please come on by show.
And if you have no problem with it or anything
if you'd like to maybe shed light on giving kidneys to people I don't know I
want to know how you feel about it I want to know how like you did this next
thing and then every maybe six months to a year the story comes up again
yeah it's stuff like this and it's that bothers them to you where you're maybe
you're like good you're fine you don't need to be the best friend you don't even like
hanging out with that.
It's not bringing it out.
I don't know.
Yeah the stories like the mick rib but it's like the mick kidney.
It's like it always just keeps coming back.
Yeah so you know but I can relate because this weekend Chris Jenner had a beautiful party
for her birthday and the theme was dress like Chris Jenner had a beautiful party for her birthday.
And the theme was, dress like Chris Jenner.
And everybody came dressed like Chris Jenner.
All the daughters and I think many of the girlfriends that were invited.
Now, I was not invited, which I wouldn't expect to be invited.
And I couldn't go anyway because I had my sold out shows with Justin and Dallas.
However, I was like, you know what's interesting?
You guys know, my was like, you know what's interesting, you guys know,
I just keep her's now.
It's annoying when I've created everything and everyone copies me and I was always the
first to do things.
And I was 100% the first person to ever impersonate Chris Jenner because she was on the e-show
and I was the first person who wrote a sketch about it, had her be it.
The first sketch she played, had her be it. On the first sketch, she played herself,
and I played Chloe, but after that,
I always played Chris, and I actually went to Halloween
and surprised her as Chris.
And Peter went in the Chris Franjola,
we borrowed Chris Franjola,
it was the original Bruce Jenner from the Olympics,
and we did this bit,
and then I took that outfit and let Peter Barth for Halloween, and we did this bit and then we then I took that
outfit and let Peter Bart for Halloween and we showed up at their house and the
two of them loved it loved it loved it and that's all I just wanted to say
you know so I did a little post and I said when you were the first person in history
to ever dress like and impersonate at Chris Jenner and they forget to invite
you to a party title dress like Chris Jenner good thing i have three sold out shows
and then i said uh... to get me over the snap happy birthday christ just
kidding
hashtag bitter beddie
juicer scoop cardashions
happy birthday just kidding
that's what you said
happy birthday just kidding
and i'm kind of kidding about this, but I'm kind of not. Okay.
But honestly, we haven't hung out in many years,
so it totally makes sense that if she had a small girls party
that I would not make that cut,
it's completely appropriate that I did not make that cut.
But I just want to remind people that it was my idea first.
Did she see it?
Did she like it?
No.
Well, so there you go.
I don't think she liked that photo, but that was the only one I had of us together.
Okay.
So Jessica Simpson did a pottery barn ad in which she used pottery barn to decorate her daughter's
room.
And people were very disturbed because they felt like she had trouble speaking her appearance.
She's lost a lot of weight.
She looks a little different.
Her eyes seem a little sunken to people's opinion.
And they all wrote about it.
And I do want to say one thing someone brought up was, you know, if you ever watched the
show with she and Nick Lache, sometimes she would have to do like commercials or ads
or whatever.
And she would have to do commercials or ads or whatever, and she would have to do a lot of takes.
So I don't think she's great in a commercial, in presenting stuff.
So I think there's that.
I think she's definitely lost a lot of weight.
And her weight has always fluctuated over the years, so I think she's had issues with
weight.
Also, once you're over 40, and I think she's about 40 can look up her age.
And you're like a size two. You're not going to look the way you looked when you were 25 in a size
two. It's totally different. She's 42 and so it's like her face is going to look different. And so
then she went on in her studio and she said, you know, fuck you.
And like, I don't need to hear this.
She wrote a caption about it and really kind of clapped back.
But I can't why people were concerned, but you know, also, she sees this all, you know,
too. So she was upset by it.
Do you think that she's on what's it called?
Ozempik? Possibly. Or something like it. Do you think that she's on what's it called ozempic?
Possibly or something like it because it made me think like one of the side effects or side effects include Yeah, tired. She seemed tired. Yeah, and just kind of like it. I even said it sound like it kind of gave me a
Flashback to when Anna Nicole Nicole was on the MTV movie awards
and she was doped out on Trim Spa.
And remember when she was talking, she was like,
oops, yeah, that's my phone, okay.
When she was like, she was like,
you want my body?
Had that weird tremble to it?
She was like, ah!
And everyone was kind of like, what's happening?
And she was really skinny.
I don't know.
She also thought T tuna was chicken.
And she thought buffaloes had wings. So maybe she's not the best for commercials.
Right. Exactly. That was one thing. Then this was juicy. A juicy scrupper wrote me this.
Harley Pasterdack. This is a weird coincidence. but the same trainer Harley Pastor NAC that allegedly threatened
to have Kanye institutionalized again where they medicate the crap out of you.
Now you're wondering what is this about?
Kanye posted exchanges he had with this trainer Harley, and which I'll get to in a minute.
Then he took it down, but he did post that and and where he said Harley sent to him I will
institute you will be institutionalized again where they mitigate the crap out
of you and you go back to zombie land forever is also this guy apparently is
Jessica Simpson's personal trainer and she she said in an interview, she was following his diet plan to lose over 100 pounds.
He also is the personal trainer to Lady Gaga,
Katy Perry, Brittany Murphy, Rest in Peace,
and her husband, Mack Miller, Rest in Peace.
Who's husband?
Brittany Murphy.
Was, her, Mack Miller wasn't married to Brittany Murphy.
Who's Mack Miller?
No, Mack Miller was a rapper. britain murphy who's mac miller no back miller was a rapper he was with the area on a grand
oh no he was britain murphy and her husband who did also pass away
from the new monea and her husband
okay so but remember she got really skinny before she passed away to yes and
she passed away then the husband passed away and then also mac miller passed away
so i don't know i don't know this is the k is the Kanye West text that he shared on Instagram,
apparently, allegedly from this trainer, from a while back.
I'm going to help you one of a couple ways.
First, you and I sit down and have a loving and open conversation,
but you don't use cuss words and everything
that is discussed is based in fact, and not some crazy stuff
that dumb friend of yours told you or that you saw in a tweet.
Harley, I'm with you.
I understand, okay?
Second option, I have you institutionalized again where they medicate the crap out of you
and you go back to zombie land forever, play date with the kids just won't be the same.
Jesus.
So very threatening.
Yeah.
And so Kanye and whatever he's trying to get his message out of how he believes he's
been mistreated in the media and through other people, he wanted people to know this about
this guy that this was sent to him allegedly.
But it didn't come out of a place of like, like, I'm gonna get you.
It's like, no, like, this is...
Well, he says again, right?
Oh yeah, just...
Well, you go back, so it's like, was he part of it
the first time that Kanye went away?
Right, is there malicious...
And he was writing it again, he's threatening it again,
and he has some connection to the powers that be
to get somebody institutionalized
as their trainer.
It's so nurse ratchet.
It's pretty scary.
It is scary.
So, let's move to some fun.
Share.
Yes.
76-year-old share is dating Amber Rose's ex-boyfriend Alexander Edwards and they after having dinner with Tiger and the three of them
were having a very quiet dinner which you go this you go to you guys go to this place if
you just honestly want to have like a really private dinner and no one to know that you
went out to dinner with anybody and it's called Craig.
Thanks.
And um popperazzi just happens to always be there.
It's just casual just a casual
popper hot see and uh got a photo of them they definitely seems romantic and he
was holding your hand in the car and like kissing her hand and he also has
doubled down and said yes like age is not he's something like age is not a
number something like that
for a really happy I'm really happy with this would you say it was a May
December romance definitely a May December romance? Definitely a May December romance. And I said, if it's a leap
year, I'm ready. I think shared shared deserves this. She's been single for a
while. Why does Madonna have to have all the fun with dating younger guys? And
you know what, if she if shares getting new dick, that means we're probably
gonna get a new tour.
And I'm all for it, because she's done her farewell tour
like 12 times.
And I love someone that says this is the final thing,
whether it's going to Oxnard or share going on tour,
and this is it if you don't show up.
I will say though, I believe he came to, I think it was,
it was him. We see if he's the father of Amber's younger son, this guy, but he cheated on, he was very charming when he came, he
was very sweet when Amber came on the show. And they were very in love at that time. And
she also said, but then he admitted to cheating on her, like on a radio show.
She found that she cheated, she got rid of them and then he confirmed it was true.
But one thing that Amber did say was that her mother adored him, loved him, loved him, loved him, loved him.
Now, I'm not saying the mother was romantically involved, but I'm just saying older women find him charming.
Good.
The last electric Alexander Edwards is their child.
And this is their child.
So this is the father of the child.
How what a weird world we live in.
Yeah.
Like share could be Amber, like Amber Rose's kid stepmom.
Right.
Whoa.
I didn't even remember that time. Oh, holy god, that's so wild. stepmom right whoa and chaz could be that child's step sibling right chaz bono step
brother yeah that's great step that could be the new step brothers yes chas Bono and this little kid. Yeah.
Do you think they're like boning?
Yes.
Do you think so?
100%.
Because I'm just wondering if it's just like taking care of her and just kissing her and
just being romantic or for it's just like, you know, he's share, can you handle this
and she's pinning them down like, I'm strong enough, you know, and you're like, I mean,
who knows what kind of how they are in the sack together?
But I think they're in the sack.
I know, but also you're 76.
I don't think she's still got it.
You still got it, but I don't know if you can do like the tricks
and the spinning and like.
She can do the tricks.
Okay, good for her.
Very sad news, of course.
We heard this on Saturday, Aaron Carter has passed.
He struggled with drugs
and alcohol for so long and he was found in his bathtub in his home and landcaster which
is like an hour outside of LA.
Have a great improv there.
No do they?
No, of course.
We will be coming to link. It's like out on the out skirts of LA, like an outside of LA.
Yeah.
And, you know, communities are there.
It also has trouble with drugs and selling of drugs.
And with the rise of fentanyl, I'm just guessing I wouldn't be surprised
if when they do do an autopsy if they do,
that besides maybe they're being prescription type drugs
in a system, maybe he tried to buy some type
of prescription drug thinking,
but he can't buy it on the street
because he needed so much of it.
And then of course those things,
there may, there's like these copycat like Xanax
where they actually have the thing
that looks like the pill.
Oh, right.
And then it has other things in it, like a fentanyl or something.
And I'm thinking, hopefully something like that didn't happen.
So it's like, yes, he was abusing drugs, but I think, of course,
it sounds very much like an accidental thing.
And it was sad he had a girlfriend, he had 11 month old child.
Oh, I didn't know that.
Yeah, and then his brother, Aaron Carter,
I mean, sorry, Nick Carter the brother,
sobbed during a touching tribute to Aaron
at a back boys, a back street boys concert
on one day after he passed.
They were in London.
Yeah, I saw this video yesterday and it was,
oh, heart wrenching.
I'm breaking. I'm a back street boys fan for life. Like, I love them to death.
And it's just so sad. He, like, I have to give props to Nick for, I mean,
finding out your brother passed away less than 24 hours and then performing in London.
Like, I don't know exactly the venue. I don't know if it was the O2 or whatever, but like,
Exactly the venue. I don't know if it was the O2 or whatever, but like
And they did a tribute they like like they were on top of it being like photos of the family and stuff and
I'm glad they went forward with the show. Yeah, they rallied around it because you know It's just because I mean by going forward with the show he was getting
love and
Attention on him and his life versus if Nick said I'm not going to do the show.
I'm going to cancel the show and then all these other people were not only sad that Aaron
died, but that they also didn't get to see the show.
So I think it was like a really great thing for him to know.
Well, and it shows like how much he loved him because even when Aaron was alive, like Aaron
would get on TikTok and say
like the most horrible things about his brother,
like where it was like sexual assault or...
Cusing, accusing him of a lot of stuff.
Yeah, and it's like at the end of the day,
he was like, no, I loved my brother.
It's just he was just in such a dark place
and couldn't get the help that he needed.
And it's yeah, it's just tragic.
And I think Hillary Duff posted about it,
like you were my first love.
I mean, he was such a big like Disney,
was he Disney or Nickelodeon?
Well, the other sad thing is,
in certain states, at least California,
you can't force your loved one to get help.
There's, you know,
unless you're that, I guess that trainer.
Yeah, exactly.
Or Lou Thornton or something.
I don't know know but for a regular
person who has a loved one like a sibling
that they really want them to go in a drug they cannot
force them to
so that's what's really hard to
uh... another prediction came true did we not call that
jingle bell rock
is lindsey low-hands new movie and no no no no no falling for
Christmas is the movie but jingle bell rock is what she's saying as mean
girls when we're with it they wore the hot Santa outfit yes so she has in
fact recorded a new version of that song and it's everything it's everything we thought it would be and it's here prediction come true watch out Mariah because
Here we go. Jingle Bell Rock. Have you heard it yet? There was a clip of it, and it's it's it's something I want to jump to
a very juicy prediction that Peter made wait what?
Peter has his own prediction okay
he sent this to me first of all he filled it off the news and was like this is
fake this is fake and then he sent it to me and he goes I predict this is fake so
the today show this story came the story behind the surfer who got photo
bombed by a great white shark Peter believes that this is not a real photo. Where what am I looking at?
Do you see the shark in the back? Oh, oh what is that a fin? Yes. Okay. Peter says he
doesn't believe it's true. His experience as a photographer, but more importantly as a San Diego native and
ocean side lifeguard. I don't know, we'll see. Peter, investigate it, tell me what
you guys think. Do you agree with Peter or not? And where is this supposed to be in San Diego?
Peter, where was this supposed to be? Southern California. He doesn't believe it. Now why don't you believe it Peter
because the shark is too big? The sharks do not come above the water like that.
The sharks do not come above the water like that. Now I will say in your defense
I will say in the defense of other people, he says ever, ever, 35 years ago when you were
a lifeguard in ocean side, the earth was different.
And apparently sharks are getting bigger or aggressive.
PNGF.
I don't know if you saw jaws three.
I don't know if you saw jaws three, but the baby of jaws went from the Atlantic ocean into
the Pacific Ocean to find the person that killed its mother.
So yeah, shit happens with sharks.
And that only happens in South Africa
on the very cold southern.
It's called Cape Town.
Peter, you're saying it only happens in South Africa.
Okay, you guys, I watched documentaries
and I've seen sharks, the green witch jump out of the water to eat in South Africa. Okay, you guys. I watched documentaries and I've seen sharks. The green which jumped out of the water to eat. All right, let's see. So in California,
is that they're all stoned and just swim under water? I know. Is that just in
successfully predicted that Lindsey Lohan would re-release the song, Jingle Bell Rock
for her Netflix Christmas movie movie and we will see
where peter's prediction lands we should probably know
in a couple weeks right me just talking about it will start
an investigation
up there with watergate
and david and baron the show and
what is the bbc documentary got all okay get him that
the christmas rock jump above the water we're to figure it out. We don't know.
Okay. Um, I know you stopped following our girl, Brittany.
I did. I couldn't let me look.
She had a weekend. Did she?
Why do weekend? Good. She.
Did she get out of her kitchen?
These is what, no, these are what people are concerned about.
Okay. So she's doing her normal dancing, crop top,
bikini bottom, white boots.
And she says my crop top with my sleeves is my bear,
she explains it as her very expensive blouse,
which is weird.
And she goes, I went back to my old house
and danced in it.
And people are like, okay, so when you sell your house
to someone, you just don't come the door.
And they happen to have all the same furniture
and you're dancing around.
So more and more people are like, I think she's losing it.
And I also really don't know if any of this is true.
Where Sam, what is happening?
Do they keep both houses?
Is this an old video?
What's happening?
And then she posted the same thing,
one, two, three, four, five, six, or five times,
which was strange.
And then this was pretty weird.
This was one of her posts this weekend. My new expensive white butterfly, t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-t-tattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattattatt as fucking heels. My second year in, I think maybe my feet got younger and I wanted to fucking run.
We will let you know when we are ready for you.
I don't know what that means.
Did you get your tea?
We made you beg two hours for it.
She's always talking about how she didn't get
to have coffee or tea when she was under the conservative ship.
So obviously my performance has went from mother fucker
to barefoot, a barefoot emoji.
Slave for you, performance.
We are all in the jungle.
Let's get ready.
Guess it was interesting.
Face with a little, what does that come from?
Monaco.
Monaco.
Entertainment.
The madlibs of it all.
It's just like pick a verb, pick a noun, pick an adjective, put it all together.
Yeah, as someone who's been studying
the Britney Spears Instagram for a solid two,
three years, I think I've been covering it,
this really doesn't make sense at all.
There were a couple that didn't make sense,
and then there was this girl on TikTok
that's like, I'm from Louisiana,
and I can, I know what she's talking about,
and she'd break it down down and i'd be like okay
this is by far the weirdest in my opinion
so i don't know i mean at this point terri's like hold my beer yeah like
she's like i got it from here girl
okay uh... very exciting rebel wilson and her girlfriend of seven months, they were engaged and then
they got married, her name's Ramona.
And then today, that was over the weekend, then they got married.
And Rebel Wilson is very beautiful and she was always a fuller girl.
She was a funny girl and pitch perfect in bride's bates.
She really slimmed down and then left her boyfriend
who was the heir to the Anisor Bush thing that also dated Adrian Maloo. They broke up.
And then she announced, I'm dating a woman, I'm in love. And today she said, and I have
a baby girl.
I mean, the ultimate lesbian. So I mean seriously, she said, thank you to my surrogate. She's 42. I don't know if she
retrieves her eggs and put it into circuit. I don't know why she didn't want to carry her own
baby, maybe medically. She couldn't and let's just be fucking honest. You've been having your whole
life and now you're like a size four and you have the money and you're also working as an actress as this size. And we have the ability to have someone else carry your baby.
I don't, I think that's what made sense.
That's my opinion.
That's what made sense.
It wasn't like she was getting it knocked up with the lesbian.
So it was going to be a planning situation no matter what.
So I think she planned to harvest the egg, whether it's her egg or someone else,
or maybe it's the
wife's egg I don't know and then put it in another woman who carried it successfully
in the baby's healthy.
And the baby's name is Royce as in Rolls Royce.
Royce, Royce Lilian.
What a weekend.
Like this is, I think this is the fastest a lesbian has ever done it seven months in a relationship
Mary, oh wait, I just realized something it's not this girls. It's not this girls egg then the baby was already
Cooking when she met her. Yeah, wait have they met seven months ago or engaged seven months ago
They got married so she So she may have already been pursuing single motherhood,
then fell in love, and then was like,
the babies here or the babies coming any minute,
let's make it official because I want you to share
this experience with me and be her other mother.
I mean, this is the ultimate.
There really is post together, there was no Vembran 2021,
but they did not make their relationship official to janeuary twenty twenty
two so the first post was november twenty
twenty one
argument which means
no november twenty twenty one
which means just a year ago
and it takes
approximately you know ten months
and might have been in the works
not have already been in the works
she might have already done the agritrival
or whatever met her and
Then come January they were a full-blown couple and the baby was already now in a surrogate by January the baby would have been in a surrogate
Yeah, because it's ten months. It's actually not nine
It's ten the whole time. Yeah
I was more it's more it's well, it's 40 it's 40 it's more like 40 weeks not 36 weeks. I don't
know who cares. Some of them sure will correct me. Okay. I mean that was the fastest you
haul lesbian relationship. I've ever witnessed like everyone's like oh lesbian wedding. No
this was a lesbian wedding. Well these girls fell in love after one pageant. No I don't
know they may have known each other but Miss Argentina and Miss Puerto Rico also got married.
And both the sets of lesbians, Rebel Wilson and her wife, very beautiful, but very similar
looking.
And these girls are their blonde beauties, and these girls are rave and hair, very pretty
beauties.
Both, you know, darker skinned and dark hair.
So, I mean, people like to marry themselves.
I mean, they like a lot of like-
I'm using a thing.
Yeah.
Have you seen gay couples on Instagram?
They kinda, you know, look a little the same.
Yeah, it's true.
It's true.
I don't, I don't look this I do no we don't we do
No, you don't really look the same but you do have similar good hair. Yeah, you and Evan. Yeah, that's fine
Yeah, yeah, I mean we're not like twins. No, you're not like same physical bodies or anything like that
Yeah
Like it tracks, you know?
I also think May, December, gay role-mances
are very much similar looking guys.
May, December's?
Like, so if the guy is like, you know, 50,
it's like, and he has a younger boyfriend or husband
who's like, let's say that is 28,
it always looks like a younger, like better version
than hit.
Like, you just married someone, not always.
But I've seen a lot of couples like that.
And there's been times when I literally been out and talking to two men and assuming they
were a couple and it was just father and son.
Oh, hi.
We're like a March July couple.
If that's a thing.
Hilarious.
This guy from the Fire Festival, Billy McFarlane, he has gotten out of prison.
And back to his old ways.
And he's going to be doing a whole festival.
And no, we don't know what he's going to be doing.
What I saw on Primetime is he, they're like, oh, you're up to another
adventure, he's like, and he's teasing it.
And so then people wrote about it, like, what do you get out? You're doing another scam and
Vulture went and saw what it was and he's like, you're to get a clue to play this
pirate game that everyone can be included in. This like, I don't know if it's going to be a festival
or a game or whatever, but he asked for your information. And so this writer
from Vulture was like, absolutely not. But someone from TMZ did. So someone
from TMZ is going gonna go through and report
what happens and if their bakey cow gets cleaned out
or if they actually go to a pirate party or what?
Could you imagine a pirate party?
Like, what do pirates do?
Plunder.
They steal from people.
They sell fire.
Sounds good, it's a treasure map.
Fire to villages, fire festival.
It's treasure map. Like This is just a scream for
He did spend 10 months in solitary solitary confinement. What time to come up with some ideas?
Anyone with pirate theme no go back back here and and I run to me of Anna Delvey our favorite
She's out of prison. She did not go to Germany, she's living in New York and and since you're
do the best Anna of anybody, I just want to ask you if I was interviewing you Anna, I heard
that you're doing a kind of festival.
Can you explain a little bit like who's going to go, what's it going to be?
It's only going to be the most exclusive party.
We're going to have everybody, all these celebrity chefs,
we'll be cooking the food, all the grilled cheese sandwiches,
we'll be made by Golden Ramsey.
Oh nice.
We're going to have like the cast of the crown will be there.
Oh wow.
Also the dragons from Game of Thrones will be there.
You can actually...
They're all going to the music festival.
You have to ride the dragons. They don't know.
Yeah, but we will have dragon riding.
So yes, it's only exclusive and very VIP. You're right. Nobody's done anything
like that. I know. I can't help it, but I'm a I'm a genius. You know, you are a genius.
And you know that she looks, you know, she looks like in this picture. Do you remember
the little, the little Russian guy, Hasbola? No. He's like a little tiny person, but like, I'll send it to you.
Looks like Hasbola in an Anadalvi wig.
I'll show it, I'll show him to you.
He's a viral sensation.
Oh, I love that.
Justin, thank you so much for coming this weekend.
Thank you.
Everybody check out his fabulous podcast, Just Say.
Yes.
And of course, follow you at Justin Martin Dale.
Please do. If you aren't already, follow you at Justin Martin Dale. Please do.
If you aren't already.
And do you have any upcoming things besides just being a juicy skill.
I think we have, let's see, we've got Thanksgiving.
Okay.
Great.
We also have a Christmas party coming up, which we'll find the date for that.
But yes, yes, I'll be around.
I'll be here in LA until probably I think, yeah, yeah, the end of the year.
We'll have you back on in a couple weeks. Please do.
I need to talk to you about the most important television show ever in my life.
And that's sister wives. Oh my god, it's gotten really good.
Boringness ever moves like molasses, but I can't stop watching it.
As you know, we have Cody and his four wives
and Christina's leaving. So last night, they have their outdoor meeting. They still are, I guess,
concerned about COVID. So they sit outside with, you know, their five chairs six feet apart.
And Christine says, my house is sold. They live in Flagstaff, Arizona. And I am taking
my youngest daughter. And the two of us are leaving Cody and all of you to move to Utah,
where my older daughter is married and lives. And she said, you know, that's it. We've
been struggling for a long time. And Mary is totally better because she's like, you
don't just give up on the family.
Like Cody, you know, and I haven't gotten along for years
and we haven't been intimate in years,
but I'm still staying because I think they're still hope.
And then they cut to Cody who's doing his interview
and he goes, I wouldn't care if Mary left for good
and found somebody else. I wouldn't care.
She has no idea. Meanwhile, she's at her Airbnb that she had with her mother,
but the mother passed.
And then she goes, I'm here.
She does like a video.
They're doing a lot of filming by themselves,
which by the way, these are the poorest reality stars
I've ever seen.
I don't know how little money TLC has been paying them, but they've been on for 12 years.
And they film a lot of them, their stuff themselves.
They show them putting a bed together, they just put a camera in the corner.
She's doing like a Instagram live with her best friend Mary, which that doesn't require
any TLC video professional.
And she's sitting there with her friend laughing so hard.
And Cody's like, I'm glad that Mary has a friend
outside of the family,
because the family doesn't really like her.
I mean, it is so awful.
Okay, so she's pissed because she's like,
I stuck through it, why don't you?
And Christine is like, well, I'm just,
I haven't been happy for a long time.
We haven't been romantic for like a decade.
And, you know, and she has, and Cody plays favorites,
favorite wives and favorite kids.
And that's not myself or my kids.
She basically says that.
Janelle, the one in the orange over here, she's nice.
She and Christine love each other.
They raise their kids together. Her kids,
like they, their kids all like each other. And Janelle's daughter, Maddie lives in North Carolina with
her husband Caleb. And Isabelle is Christine who's leaving. That is her daughter. And she's going to
go to community college, which is near Caleb and Maddie's house and live with them.
And she's like, I am just so excited for Isabelle to be with Caleb and Maddie.
They're so excited for her.
She's so close to them.
And Caleb just can't wait for her to come.
And I just so great for her to see a wonderful marriage and how a wonderful marriage looks.
Am I the only one thinking that this might be maybe not the intention? I'm just saying prediction would not be surprised if in a few years, Isabel was
quote unquote marrying into this family.
I know some people, I, if the sister-wise watched this, they might get very upset
with me.
I know some people, if the sister wives watch this, they might get very upset with me. You came from a polygamous family, Christine.
You were in one.
It didn't work out because of Cody.
So if Caleb could be great to two wives, I'm just saying, has anyone else thought this?
Okay?
So anyway, Robin, who's been the favorite, favorite is the fourth wife,
who is the actual only legally married wife
because she brought three children
into the marriage with Cody as the fourth wife.
And he was like, can I marry her, Mary, can I divorce you?
And can I marry her so that her kids can,
I don't know, have health insurance or something,
I don't really know why,
but they did it that way and Mary agreed.
And since then, during the three years of COVID,
Robin and Cody were like, COVID terrified COVID people. And so he really used that, I think, as excuse to like, never really see any of the other wives, any of their kids, and it ruined an already
bad situation with Christine. So Christine's's like i'm leaving that's it
and robin starts getting so mad
and she says um... christine goes it's been bad since we all lived in the cul de
sack
in lost vegas
and robin goes that's not true your lying your lying it wasn't that bad it wasn't
that bad
and it's like so weird because it's robin who's a fourth-wife it's like
i just don't think
i want to be stuck with this guy forever and i feel bad because now the whole
world is going to think i as fourth-wife
like runes this polygamous family when that is not what i signed up for at all
and that's what i find so interesting
and now
kody says signed up for at all. And that's what I find so interesting. And now Cody says, we have
been public for 12 years. And I set out as my purpose to show the world that polygamous
marriage works. And by you leaving, and you deciding that it's over, even though I didn't
want to have sex with you and I never came to visit, but by you leaving,
now it puts a crack in the facade that polygamy isn't as great as what we said, and now I look
like a fraud.
So again, it's not even about Christine's happiness or about the happiness of the family.
It's still about him because he's like, oh my God, now everyone's going to say this doesn't
work.
Well, it doesn't.
It doesn't.
And you know who's the most miserable of all?
Cody.
Cody's the most miserable of all because he has to live with himself.
They only have to live with him just a little bit.
And now, one's in a trailer.
It doesn't have room for him in his hair products.
That's Janelle.
Mary, he wants nothing to do with.
He's like, go live far away in your Airbnb.
And Christine is leaving to a whole nother state back to Utah.
And Robin is like holy shit.
This I have to deal with this guy and his narcissism and his ego alone.
And then also where does the show go?
I think they're all also freaking out like where does the show go?
Of Christine leaves.
Now the kids are getting older.
We're not doing all this stuff together.
Oh, by the way, the oldest son of Janelle's.
He got married and I guess once you turn 18, you need everyone to be on the show or anything,
but they were all invited to the wedding.
I found out that behind the scenes.
So there you guys go.
Very juicy.
Watch it.
Real also, Salt Lake, just all about the Mormons.
I'm going to just do a fun recap on Salt Lake City of what made it juicy this week.
Well, this guy is like a cute bear, and he, I guess, left the church too,
and he's going to start a choir for Heather Gay to sing in,
and like she's going to have auditions.
So it started out like that.
And then Lisa Barlow talked to her son about going to college, and he's like, Fudge College
Mom, and she's like, I know you have your products that we set you up with your companies,
but I still think that you should go, you know, I still think you should go to college.
I mean, I want you to go to college.
And she's in a lot of turmoil because the season has started where rumors are flying
that Lisa Barlow who has Vita tequila which by the way don't know it very hard to find
sent sent to me Lisa you send it to me when I was in parks in Utah I don't know where else
to get it anyway the girls were saying that she was blowing people to get Vita to keel it into restaurants and
things and that she was also blowing some guy to get jazz tickets for the family. She has
since totally denied it. Meanwhile, this part said Whitney who talks like this, her
husband Jason, he comes home and tells her he's been fired from his high position at a big MLM that sells,
I think, vitamins.
So he was like, top tier helping with sales.
And he starts to cry and she's like,
let me get you a paper towel,
which I thought was kind of rude
because I don't think that's very soft.
He already has kind of a little bit of a rosacea,
but she's got her own skin care line.
Maybe she can help.
And she's crying, she's thinking,
wait, what happened?
Why would they fire you?
What did you, you're so good at your job.
What happened?
And he's like, well, they said it's because you're a public person.
And you have a public image and it's just not working
for the company anymore.
Why, what have I ever done as a public image and it's just not working for the company anymore. Why? What have I ever done as a public personality to have any type of embarrassment on you or the company or my family?
And then they cut to this scene from a year ago when she and just in her husband are in their...
I don't know, I think she's topless, by the way, she's topless, she is just a G string on or tiny underwear.
He has shorts on, he has like tidy shorts on.
And they, I don't know if they have mud or paint,
but they're wrestling with all the cameraman
and all the audio people, and then they put it on the show.
I've told you this before, I don't know why housewives
is so into showing nude women all the time,
when 98% of the people that watch the show are straight
women.
I don't get why they think that's so enticing to us, but maybe it's a way for us to
rip on them after.
I don't know.
I don't know.
He got fired.
She sat about it.
Then we find out that this other girl Angie, her husband, like just admits.
He's like, yeah, I started a fake Twitter account just to
troll some of the other housewives.
What?
This girl Angie is like a friend, she's trying to be on a housewife.
And then he goes, well, Angie was just, you know, got so much press, so much got trash
in the press.
So I didn't know how else to defend her, but to create a fake account, call Shaw Exposed
and go after Jen Shaw and Lisa Barlow.
And so creep, it's like a grown like 50 year old man that I believe has a lot of money.
And he's doing this like so weird.
And Meredith is like, oh my god, that's so disturbing.
But you know what, they've been awful to you.
You've been awful to them.
At least you're owning it that you are a troll so weird and but a stroll
account I guess was doing great and he was going after all of them and I thought
that was so bizarre and then at the end of the episode Jen Shaw goes out with a
megaphone to rally up
All the people that came to audition for Heather Gays
Choir which looked like there was about five guys it looked like it was 5 p.m. At the roundup in Dallas
Like there's literally like five old gay guys like waiting to like sing their heart out like the nobody showed up to this thing
It was frickicking hilarious.
Okay you guys it's here it's almost the end of the 2022 live jesuscoup tour.
I do not want you to miss out.
I have a few tickets left for Boston that is Thursday at the Wilbur Theatre Thursday November 17th with Chris Franchola.
This is going to be such a great all of them are gonna be so great, you guys.
We have had such a fun time doing these shows.
There's only a few tickets left there.
We just open a few great, great seats that are left.
Friday the 18th in Philly, Philadelphia, you guys get that.
And I don't know, there's probably a handful of tickets
of each.
There's an early and late show on Saturday,
November 17th in DC at the Kennedy Center.
All of that is at Heather McDowell.net. Pull over right now if you are in any of those cities and get your tickets right now.
Because after that, it's over. I do not enjoy hearing your crying emails and messages about how you didn't get the tickets.
Because I really don't know when you'll ever get to experience something like this.
This is a completely brand new topical show, whether you came to any of my other shows
or the streamer or saw my stand-up last year.
This is why it's so great.
Especially if you've seen our stand-up and you like our stand-up, you're going to enjoy
seeing Chris and I together in a live setting doing crazy stuff that we can only do in
a live juicy scoop.
HeatherMcDollon.net.
Thank you.
and I together in a live setting doing crazy stuff
that we can only do in a live Tuesday school.
Heather McDonnell.net. Thank you.