Keep it Positive, Sweetie - A New Season of Abundance with Miss Lawrence

Episode Date: March 26, 2024

This week I have the talented and fabulous Miss Lawrence on the couch. I knew we were going to kiki, but I had no idea that he was going to preach a good sermon. He reminds all of us to nurture the gifts that God gave us and to always be our authentic self.

Hello and welcome to this episode of Keep It Positive, sweetie. I am Krista Renee Haisland and today we have with us none other than Miss Lawrence. I'm so happy you're here. Thank you for having me. Yeah, no, seriously. It's been a long time. We've been saying we're gonna figure out something, whether it be lunch, whether it be a dinner or something. If you have an event or if I'm having one, but our schedules could never align. So, you know, everything works in divine order and time. And I think this is perfect.

Thank you so much. I'm so happy you're here. We like to start the show with the song or quote. And when I think of you I think of authenticity You are just so authentically you and I love that and this quote says True belonging doesn't require you to change who you are It requires you to be who you are and I feel like that is exactly what you embody Like you are just who you are what you see is what you get and people love you for that. Thank you. Yes, they do

the first time I really like learned about you was, I'm not really a reality TV show person, but I saw you on the show Star. Yes. I absolutely loved you on Star. Thank you. And then I don't know if you remember this, but my friend Siobhan, who was a costume.

Oh my God, the costume, yes! That's my baby, my daughter. Yes, Paige. My heart, yes. So I came on set to see her and you were walking with Queen Latifah and we stopped and spoke for a second before we actually met at Kim Blackwell's event. Okay. Last year the Galentine's event, but that was before we had met actually talked. Okay. So we like spoke shortly and I was like, oh my God, I love his energy. Yeah. And then we met again at Kim Blackwell's event.

Yeah, at the Gal Blackwell's event. Yeah, at the Galentine's event. Yeah, at GEO's. God, I don't, and you know, I do remember that, but I more so remember us talking a little more in depth at the Sisters event that BET did. Yes, she did. So I remember that, yeah.

Yeah, that's what we really, really did. We had a chat. Yeah, it was good. I love that. So I always like to tell people how we met but I remember that and ever since then we've chatted on instagram and I keep up with you on instagram what you have going on. Thank you. Yes but we're so happy to have you here and everyone knows you from television and social media but we want to take it back. Okay. I'm saying who

was Miss Lawrence growing up? Where are you from? We wanna know all the things. I am a real, real Georgia Peach. Hey! I have labeled myself as the Atlanta mother. I'm born and raised right here in Atlanta on the south side of Atlanta. I'm from the south side of Atlanta. Growing up, I was not Miss Lawrence. I was just Lawrence, you know.

I'm a junior, people always gag. I'm a junior, honey. But look, I just told somebody about it. Last night I was somewhere, they said, you were a junior. I said, yes, honey, turns out I was a junior Mrs. But yeah, you know, life was, it was good. It was interesting, but it was good. I think the best part about me growing up in Atlanta

is that I did not have one of those families that ostracized me for embracing the Mrs. in me. And I was able to just be myself. But a lot of that came from my mother, I would have to say, because my mother, her biggest teachings, and I think most households, especially in black culture, don't lie. Don't tell no lie.

Whether it's did you get them chips out the cabinet, or did you pick this up, don't tell no, don't you lie. But I applied that principle in everything. That's amazing. In everything. So I never knew how to be, how to hide. I never knew how to be something other than what I felt on the inside because I was taught not to lie.

Now, I don't think my parents knew that that principle would apply in that way. I don't think they knew that when I went outside, even with them, whether we were going to Piccadilly or going to Red Lobster for a birthday, I don't think they knew that when they said don't lie, oh I'm putting this Vaseline on this because sir is my lip gloss. I don't think they knew that. But again, I was taught not to lie. And I literally, you know, my journey as a, as a adolescent, as a teenager has been just that. I walked to the beat of my own drum and I walked and delivered what I felt in the moment,

in the era. Yeah. That's amazing. So what was it like when you realized there's something different about me? I'm not like the other boys that I see on the playground. When did you know like? Yeah, you know I had cousins and then they would remind me of it You're right, you know, you know, you know boy cousin, you know, but jokingly it was all love, you know

You know, of course, you would you know, I've got teased, you know, of course, you know, I got teased, you know, in school. I was never bullied, though. I have to say I was never bullied. But I, you know, we get teased and, you know, stuff like that. So I knew, I knew then that, you know, I was not something that society was used to, or that society necessarily wanted to see. But again, I didn't know any other way to be. And what age was this when you like start when your cousin started to like? Early, honey, because I was always the dancer. I would always dance and I always do the latest dances, the Cabbage Patch, the all those. So I would always be the one like, oh, come dance. And they would just fall out because it was always so gay. You know, it was always so, you know, and yeah, so I was young. I was young. I don't, not even a

teenager yet. Not even a teenager. And my parents, Lord, they tried their best. They had me play football. They had put me in the Boy Scouts. All of it, all of it, they tried, they tried everything. But see, when I started, when I played football, I became really good at it because, and me and my friend, we just talked about this yesterday. I'm gonna be good at whatever it is that I do, because that, you know, that's, it's no other way. If I end up committing to something, I'm going to give it my all and be whether I

like it or not. I didn't want to play football, but I became good at it so much so that the coach reached out to my father. The following season was like we want to have him back as quarterback. I was like, oh no, I'm not doing it again. I'm not doing it again. Y'all tried it one time. I'm still a sissy. It didn't work. I'm not doing that again. Y'all tried it one time. I'm still a sissy. It didn't work. Right.

So what did you enjoy as a kid? I'd always loved the arts. I loved singing. I loved playing dress up. Yeah, stuff like that. Okay. So when you said, I don't want to do this anymore, what did your dad say?

Oh, I mean, I, you know, I think he was like, okay, this ain't, you know, this ain't working. But again, there was no, there was no harshness. That's amazing. Yeah, that was, that was, I mean, don't get me wrong. We, we had moments that did not feel good, you know, but the older I got, the more I looked into why we are the way we are as black people, as black families and our discontents. I understood their position and the lack of knowledge around acceptance. And that helped me to heal any wounds from that period of my life. Yeah. Could you tell me because I do want to expand on that because I know there are

some younger men right now going through that same thing and trying to navigate that with their parents. Would you share like some of those tough moments and like how you actually navigated through that and heal through that? You know what? I'm going to tell, I kind of delved into my purpose, right? So going back, I said, I always loved the arts. I love singing, I love, you know, the performing art,

dancing, all that kind of stuff. So going into my mid to late teens, I became a hairstylist early, like age 15 years old, because I was really good with my hands and I always loved beauty. And in particular, I love black women and beauty, right? All things beauty. But, um, and I became really, really, really good at it. And in my late teens, early 20s, I started making some really good money. And because I felt like in my mind, I had to show my parents that the idea that they had are the ideals that have been put out there about black queer people or about about black gay men or

flamboyantly black gay men that we won't be successful or that we won't have a fair shot at life was not true. And so I became really, really successful at an early age. And I think that's when a lot of the barriers broke as it relates to my relationship with my family. Now, a lot of damage had already been done. Kind of a lot of unspoken stuff. There was always an elephant in the room. There was always a lack of communication,

not knowing how to have that real conversation about the birds and the bees. Because it's like, how do I have that conversation with my gay child when I know nothing about gay sex or anything like that? But I later learned that it's not, we make it hard. If it's a conversation about sex,

it's a conversation about sex, whether it's gay or not, whether a person is same gender loving or not, conversation is about sex. But to their defense, they didn't know that. Yeah. They didn't know that. So a lot of hard conversations that a person

would typically have with their parents, I didn't necessarily get that because they didn't know how. They didn't know how and that's okay. And that is when I leaned to my friends in the streets, my sisters and my brothers that are also a part of the LGBTQ community that I now call my chosen family. That's where chosen family comes from. When you don't get all of the, you know, I guess the emotional support that you might need at home or the emotional intelligence that you need from your family,

you venture out and you find like-minded people, people that can tell you, no, you are spot on with who you are. And it's those people that added a lot of growth factors to me. Now, a lot of my foundation, again, my relationship with God, my commitment to working and providing for myself, having stability and structure. I did get that from my parents.

Gotcha, okay. I love that. We talk about your relationship with God. I know a lot of times there is a lot of stipulations when it comes to church and the homosexual community. I had went to a church before, it was here in Atlanta, and the pastor spoke out against homosexuality and how he did not agree with it.

And then the moment that I ended up leaving the church was when, because it made me a little uncomfortable because I feel like we're supposed to love everyone no matter their choices, because God told us to lead with love. We talked about that last night, leading with love. You do what you want to do, I'm not here to judge you, only God can judge. God is love. Yes, and leading with love. Like you do what you wanna do, I'm not here to judge you. Only God can judge.

God is love. Yes, and lead with that. And this homosexual, I mean, he was clearly a homosexual man. Had come into the church, he was sitting on the front row, like where like the deacons and the, you know, the mothers of the church was sitting. I was like.

No, he did that on purpose, but go ahead. Yeah, so, right. No, what had happened was we ended up finding out because the pastor had to like get up in front of the church and like. I was like... Now he did that on purpose, but go ahead. Yeah, so, right. You know what had happened was we ended up finding out because the pastor had to like get up in front of the church and like admit what had happened. This man had like said he was going to give the church all this money and that completely turned around. I said, so you'll accept him for who he is because he's going to give the church all this money. And that was my exit. I was like, it's time for me to leave because you not a couple months ago, you were preaching against it. But because... You wasn't using the girls some months ago, you were preaching against it, but because-

You wasn't using the girls some months ago, but now the girls came with some coins. And now, oh, you sit right here next to mother Mitty. Exactly, literally. A mother Hattie. Yeah. A mother Beverly. Yep.

Yeah. But a few months ago, you- Yeah, you- You did that. Yeah, and I was like, wow. I went to a church here. I used to, I grew up in church. I'm singing choirs, all that.

And when I started going to one church that I was not active in, I just went to the church and I was going faithfully and it was a mega church. And I remember the pastor giving like this whole sermon against or condemning homosexuality and I was like what so I got up and left in the middle of service I got up and I was done too I had to I was fendi head to toe I was beat but anyway I grew up like that I watched my grandmother go to church and she was always done oh my goodness so

you put the clothes you put your clothes on and go to church anyway absolutely so I got up and left and I didn't go to church for years. And I mean for years after because honestly, I didn't feel like I had to, right? Because I knew God for myself and I knew God was in me. And I always did his work. I always walked in his wheel. And another principle is that you are judged on how you serve. Did you give your brother or your sister or the mothers and fathers food when they were hungry, clothes when they were naked, or water when they was thirsty?

I can check all those boxes. I didn't have to go to church. I felt like I don't need it. Because I'm not gonna sit there and allow that to fester up inside of me when I know him for myself. So I don't need to hear man's perception of what God is and what God thinks about me, because I already know for myself.

So I left church and I left for a very long time. And a few of my friends, two of them in particular, was started, they joined this one church and they said, you should really come. I was like, I'm not going to, uh-uh. I had given up singing in a choir and all of that because by this time I was full, I was in full bloom, honey. I was, I was in full, I had done gave up the suits and stuff, child. I was in full bloom blouses and things. I said, well, I ain't singing in a choir no more, clearly, because, you know.

So I had let all that go. So I was like, there's no reason for me to go to church. I know the word, I know God. I do what God asks, you know. I honor my mother, my father, da da da da da. And they said, no, but you should really, you should just come.

So I went to a church here in Atlanta, the Vision Church, and I fell completely in love. My bishop is from the LGBTQ community, we have a first gentleman, and it literally opened up a whole new portal of teachings that I would not have gotten had I not gone back to church. New principles that I now apply to this day, along my walk and my journey.

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visit their website at thisisl.com. And the next time you're in the peer care aisle, look for L pads and tampons. Choose love, choose L. You know, I tell people that have experienced church hurt, especially within my community, the black LGBTQ space, is, you know, let's not lean to the church and lean to man. Let's lean more on our relationship with God and let's ask God for discernment to lead you to the proper teacher. Come on now. To the proper teacher. Yes. And that's what happened for me. Wow. Yeah. Lawrence, I love that because I feel like anyone in the faith

can really like agree with and identify with what you're saying because I've had church hurt. I've had, and I've been guilty of like putting faith in the person and really connecting with the person that's delivering the word and forgetting this is a human being. Yeah. You know, and a lot of people get church hurt

from just like, well, he shouldn't be in the public because he's doing this and this and this. it was tyler that actually had to check me He was like chris. So you're not there for the the man you're there for god because that man like you said that man is human as well That man could be in spiritual warfare That man could be battling stuff himself. Yes. He's not exempt. He's not exempt He could be preaching but preaching to himself in that moment. You know what I'm saying? And so when I got up and left out of the church, I wasn't judging him. I just knew that he wasn't the teacher for me. Right.

I knew that he needed a teacher. Yes. Wow. Oh my goodness. That is so good. I love that. And I love that you have found a home. I did not know that church existed. Oh, it's everything. That's amazing. Yeah. It's progressive Pentecostal, so they jump pews and they flip and run around.

Girl, they, I got a bullshit head. Girl, they can say, they can say, it's a, oh, it's, it's a beautiful, I got a bullshit.. Now girl, you ain't felt no spirit. It's cause he said, but I love it. I love, I love the antics. I love all of it. That is amazing. I really want the Christian community for sure to just leave with love, you know, I think that is so important.

That's what they're supposed to do. But you know what they, a lot of them have not done is studied the book for themselves. They've not studied where the book came from, the different versions of the book came from. One of my friends mother always says study and show thyself, well that's written but she always reiterates it, study and show thyself approved. See the problem is so many people have been listening to man meaning our bishop and our pastor and they are chosen, they are chosen, I'm not going to say that they're not,

they are chosen, you know, but you still have to study and show thyself. You go study for yourself. Yes, because you'll get something else. Because they might, what they're studying and what they get from it is what the Holy Spirit gave them. But all of our connections, all of our connections are personal. Yeah. I might get something from reading one scripture that you might not get you might get something totally separate

That's how the Holy Spirit talks to it is, you know And so for that reason I can now sit in the church and I said, mmm, I didn't get that from right exactly And that's okay. Yeah, but a lot of a lot of our Christian community They've not done that they've leaned solely on what they have heard and what they've been taught, opposed to listening to the teachings and then going back and studying yourself. It's no different than what you do in school.

It's no different than what you do when you study for your doctorate, or your masters, or your bachelors. I have neither one of those, by the way. But I know the process. Yeah, right, exactly. That is so good. Pastor Darius Daniels, I go to Change Church. Oh yeah, oh,, I love that church. I went there. I went there with Carlton. My friend Carlton.

Oh, yeah. I mean, your other friend. Y'all went together. Carlton. Y'all went together. Carlton. Yeah, But I'm quiet. Yeah, no, I don't want to change. I came in on business 10 crowd. Yeah. Okay. Amazing. Yeah, I love my church. We did a whole series on God did not say that and we literally went through scripture and broke it down and like even like how we pray in the things that we've been taught all of our lives.

We're like, wait a minute. That's not what God intended. And then we're going through the scripture like wait a minute, wait a minute, God, he did not say that. And you're like, this what they, but they so wrong. Yes. But imagine, now listen, that's one congregation. Imagine the thousands of black churches. And we wonder why we still to this day

can't get on wanna call it as brothers and sisters. It's a lot of unlearning and unpacking and rebuilding and bridge building that we have to do. And so when you discover these things, or when you've been given discernment and, you know, it is now our responsibility. It is now our responsibility, even when it's uncomfortable. Even when I have to try my best to foster a relationship

with a black straight man who has been extremely antithetical to a black gay person. I have to look beyond that and be willing to teach. Yes, wow. Because that is what also serving. Mmm. Come on. Listen.

This one. This one. Right. Please. What is it? It is digital. No, he's like, my cash app. My cash app is Lady Law.

No, but I, listen, I have to say, I'm bugged out right now as you've kept speaking, thinking about like how so many churches will kick LGBTQ people out, but I'm so happy that there's a home for them at Vision and at churches like that because again, the command is to love. Why would you think that God doesn't want to have, like the righteous Christian thinks that you don't deserve a home, you don't deserve a church home.

So we're gonna kick you out. That in itself is a complete contrast to what God is. Yes, like why would you think that God does not want relationship with you? You know what I'm saying? It's so crazy to me because... We need that pastor on here. Because we like, yeah, Bishop O.C. Allen, I connect y'all.

Okay. Because the reality is, God uses everybody. And people would want to condemn the pastor for starting a church that's gay welcoming instead of focusing on the fact that the same community that you guys feel is so wrong is still finding God which is still the biggest goal. The biggest I can add to that, really. Yes, please.

I would just say when you talk about studying and showing our self-approved, once again, it's we fall in love with the traditions of men. You understand? So when you talk about, if you're not approved for something, that means you're in a not right now situation, you're in a decline situation, because you haven't shown up for who you are,

and whose you are. And once you turn it up, you know who you are. This is what we do. We know this all day. I love this. I can touch on that. That's what you mean by study and show that someone who didn't know God for yourself.

That's what it is. So when you think about the interpretation that you falling in love with God for who he is when he was done in your life. That's saying you'll speak differently, you'll walk differently. That's what I mean'll see different, you'll walk it. That's it. Yes. Yes.

I let him go to the church and they broke it. See? See what I'm saying? But you know, it's like, Jesus went out and sat amongst the people. The people. Not amongst the righteous. No.

He went and sat amongst the people because it was the people that was gonna go out and do the work for him. Yes, yes. But think about those chosen people. Oh my gosh. Yeah. All of them murderers.

Yeah, a murderer. He killed people. And we over here judging somebody for loving somebody else. You can go down the list. And they were all sinners. Yes, every last one of them. Every last one of them. Every last one of them. So who are we to judge?

Who are we to judge? When God chose, like, he said, I want y'all. Oh, this is so good. Something else I want to talk about, now that we're on like the judgment, and there's so much discrimination like on social media and people trying to expose people and out them. I was having this conversation with my brother Marquis. We're like,

it's nobody's business. Like why are you so worried about what somebody else is doing? It's so sad. And I just, I, I'm like, why are we going backwards? Man, why are we going backwards? It is so much work that has to be done with us, in our culture, in our community.

First of all, let us pay attention to that thing, that phone. Oh my goodness. That tool, social media. And how if we have allowed it to be the thing to weaponize us and our relationship with each other. And I have my theory that that is exactly what it was intended for.

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It's just, it just looks different now. If you go back to, you know, when they tried to cause division amongst us with classism, in black families, you know, you had the upper-leaning mobile Negroes, and then you had the Negroes in the hood. Yeah. You know, you can't sit with us, you can't, social media has become that exact same thing

and we are disproportionately, as black people, affected by it. And it is so easy to use homophobia as one of the greatest tools to conquer and divide us. While we are on the precipice of another presidential election, you know, while we are still fighting for women's rights, while we are still fighting to make sure that our black brothers and our black fathers and our black sons have the protection and the support that they need from social injustices, police injustices, you name it. All of these things that we should be standing

as a united front for, we can't do it because we are so distracted by this little thing in our hand and somebody's weird, negative, ill-informed opinion about someone's sexuality, and who they choose to love or lay down with, you know? And I don't know, I don't know how to get, I don't know when we will all get on one accord in trying to fix that. For myself, during the pandemic,

I started having these dinners called Plated Purpose. Miss Lawrence Presents Plated Purpose. And it was created to bridge the gap between the black straight community and the black LGBTQ community. And it started for several reasons. One, when I was a hairstylist before I retired, one of my long-term clients told me that,

one of her sons was gay. I had never heard about him, but I knew some of her other kids, but I never knew about that one. And I said, oh, I never met him. She said, yeah, well, he doesn't talk to us. And I'm saying, oh, okay. And I said, oh, I never met him. She said, yeah, well, he doesn't talk to us. And I'm saying, oh, okay. And I said, well, she said, I don't know,

he just, he won't talk to us. And I said, well, did you all ever make him feel by certain type of way, you know? And she said, oh, no, you know, it wasn't our intention. When he was younger, we, she said, we would try and buy him little trucks and shit, but you know, and she said, we didn't know what to do with them. We didn't know what to do, wow.

And I, and she was broken. Here's someone in their late 60s, going into their 70s. And she's broken because she does not have wholeness in her family because of a construct that shouldn't be there. And I told her, I said, well, what happens is when you all lack the emotional intelligence to support your child because they are gay,

are gay presenting, are trans presenting or whatever. Anything that doesn't align with what you think values are, with what you think how they are supposed to go, and you don't know how to show up for them emotionally and support them mentally. I said, when they become of age and they go outside, they go find it somewhere else. And that is where chosen families come

from. And so they go find the support that they need. God gives them what they need. Maybe you couldn't give it to, maybe God couldn't use you because you wouldn't allow him to use you to show up for that baby the way that you should have. But God get God place it on somebody else and he got it. So there is now no need for you all. So that is where the absence come from and when I saw the hurt in her eyes I could feel her pain and I said it's so unfair because it's not your fault and it's not his fault and we just got gotta communicate that. We have to both understand,

on both sides have to understand where we have our faults in it and the part that we played in it. That was one thing. Another thing was the whole thing about when the baby, the rapper DaBaby, when he had his whole debacle about what they called a homophobic slur, a homophobic comment

or whatever that was made. And in my opinion, when I went and listened to it carefully, and I did not hear him use the F word. I didn't hear him call anybody a sissy. I didn't hear any of that. I did hear exactly what he said. He said, put your phones, a light your phones or whatever.

If you ain't out here giving nobody AIDS, if you ain't got AIDS, da da da da da, which is very wrong to say, because that is something that affects all of us, not gay, not straight, but everybody. But everybody, now his DJ said some homophobic stuff, but he himself did not, however, when it came out, the baby getting canceled for homophobics.

And I said, no, no, no. Who's putting that out there? Because that's not what I heard. Now what he said was really wrong. It was terrible. Poor judgment and worse. He definitely shouldn't have said it. And if you look closely,

if he was getting canceled for homophobic remarks or slurs, wouldn't every rapper from back in the day be canceled? Every one of them. So how was he, what was, no, what it was, was that you said something about HIV and AIDS, and that not only affects the black people, it affects the white people too. Come on now. Yeah.

And so when you looked at the people that spoke out about it, when you saw Elton John, when you saw Madonna, when you saw them speak out, now he's canceled. Now he's canceled. But our black brothers and sisters, they perceived it as,

oh, the gay community canceling our straight brother. Cause he said, that's not what happened. But that's how it was put out there, which caused further division. And so that was another thing. And I got on the phone with my dear friend, April Ryan. And I said, we've got to figure something out. We got to have a family meeting

because what's happening, it's happening on purpose and somebody got to educate and matriculate us on each other on what's happening on purpose. And somebody got to educate and matriculate us on each other on what's going on. And so it had just been sitting on me and sitting on me like, what can I do? And I'm only one person, but somebody got to start somewhere. And I'm not saying that I'm the first to start it.

I don't know. I knew I had to do what I felt on my spirit. And I was like, what can I do? I got to figure out something. And I have like, what can I do? I gotta figure out something. And I have a very close friend, Ashana Ayers, and I was talking to her, she was like, well, do something about it. What are you gonna do?

Do something about it. Because I'd be in arguments with her or some of my other straight friends. They're like, well, no, well, no, because the gay community, y'all already got that. I was like, no, don't do the y'all thing. Yeah, right. Don't do the y'all thing.

We don't, everybody don't fit under that rainbow umbrella. Don't do the y'all thing. Yeah. Don't do the y'all thing. Everybody don't fit under that rainbow umbrella. That's right. Know who that umbrella was designed for. And you will discover, you will discover a lot of bifurcation there. You will discover a lot of separatism there. You will discover that a lot of separatism there. You will discover that a lot of your black gay brothers and sisters is left on the outside

of the umbrella. So we don't have full protection like people think we do. Again, we are not a monolithic group. And she said, okay, what are you going to do? Figure out something. I said, maybe I need to have, maybe let me figure out something because I have been put in a position where I know the language of both sides.

I was a hairstylist for 20 years. And I was able to live a very good life for myself because of black women that allowed me to be in service to them. At an early age, when society told me I would not have a lovely home to live in, or I would not be able to do this or do that, God said, yes you will, and I'ma use these sisters

to make sure it happens. And in return, you're gonna edify them. You're gonna affirm them. And so that is what our relationship has always been like, myself with black women. And for every black woman that sat in my chair That was a whole family that I got to touch. Yeah. Oh Including their husbands including their children

Yeah, so I understand the language of both sides and then when I go over on This side to my community my people my oysters my village this side to my community, my people, my oysters, my village, my black LGBTQ brothers and sisters, and I understand their frustrations, but they might not have been, you know, as fortunate to have the type of relationships that I've had with heterosexual people, or straight people. I know their language too, because it is also my language.

And I said, well, I'm in a position where I could bring it together and let's try to fix this. And so my friend Ashana said, well, do something. So fast forward, I said, I'm gonna do a dinner. I'm gonna do a dinner and I'm gonna invite maybe 10 people from the black LGBTQ community, 10 from the black straight community.

I reached out to Ingrid Best. You know Ingrid, right? I love Ingrid. I have to shout her out. I love Ingrid. At that time, she was head of marketing for Serac. And I asked her, I sent her a text and I said, Hey kids family, it's time to celebrate Black History Month at the Walmart Black and Unlimited Clock. One at Flatiron Plaza in New York City, one at Ovation Hollywood in Los Angeles, from 8am to 8pm, with giveaways dropping every hour on the hour. It's the perfect time to try, like, and share black-lead products.

It's free! That's right, and it's for everyone. And it's your chance to see how you can level up your daily routine with black led products that are creating a new world of choices at Walmart. Trust me, you don't wanna miss it. We are approaching Black Pride Month in Atlanta. I said during Pride Month, during Pride Month in June, we're approaching Black Pride Weekend in Atlanta.

However, in June, it's Pride Month. And you have a, there's an outpouring of brands that support Pride Month. But if you go and take inventory of who benefits, at that time we were very far and few between, I mean, black LGBTQ people. And I said, I would love for a black founded liquor brand to support Black Pride in Atlanta.

I want to host an event. I want to put together an event to bridge the gap between the black straight and the black LGBTQ community. What could you support me? And she said, whatever you need, yes. Literally funded my whole dinner and it was the most beautiful thing. Everybody came that I invited.

I had Bevy Smith who came and did a Unity toast. Our brother Kenny Burns, Andrew Day came and she had just won her Golden Globe and she hopped on a plane and came to the dinner. Our dear sister, Devine Joy came, Patrick Ian Polk. I mean, you name it, Kim Page from BET, I mean, everybody. It was a lot of support, a lot of support from my brothers and sisters on both sides.

And I knew that I was onto something because, some of the people came up afterwards and said, I'm charged and what can we do? Because the goal is, and then the call to action is to go out and share the information, not about the event, but share the information about the disconnect and why the disconnect has happened and why it's been done on purpose. And so I started Plated Purpose for that reason.

And so far so good, we just need more of those. Now here's the ugly side to it, right? When you out doing good, it gets no attention. What is that about? When you're trying to make a difference, when you're trying to make it, it gets no attention. But I do have, my first thing I do have to thank BASEP and Bala Alert because they did they covered it and they mentioned

it. But when you're when you're shedding light on what our issues are and a possible solution to fix it, it garners no attention. That's the part that we the powers that be the people that have be, the people that have influence, the people that know the people that know the people that run the people, that run the board and click the buttons, spread the information about how we're wrong. The stuff they out here doing with Meek Mill

and who else, they clowning, Shannon Sharp, they clowning on Shannon Sharp right now. Why? But then at the next breath, oh we got to protect our black brothers. But you're not protecting them. You're creating lies and just it's crazy. You're forcing them to go into a hiding space. Not that they have anything to hide from, but you're now playing or trying to push them into this space of insecurity. That they can't welcome themselves,

their whole selves into society without somebody judging them. Because they may gesture a way that some people might think is inappropriate or isn't of the norm. Right. It is baffling. It is.

And I, yeah, I did see those, both of those, and I'm actually really good friends with Meek. I don't know Shannon, but that like, I was like, why do people do that? And then your heart goes out, because people don't understand. I was also talking to Marquise about this too, like how, and Deval, how our life, when we're in the light,

it becomes other people's entertainment. And they literally do not have any concept of how that can have an impact on us when they're constantly judging or making accusations or just making a comment and having an opinion about every part of our lives. It's crazy because not to make this about Meek Mill, but he has had one of the most, I don't even know,

glorified turn up songs, lit, whatever they, you know, dreams and nightmares. Yes, classic. I don't care where you go. In this world. Yeah, in this world. In this world. Yeah.

When you hear that, you feel a sense of power. You do. It's crazy. You feel a sense of power. It inspires you in some way in that moment. It could be as small as inspiring you to want to buy a bottle. Yeah. It can inspire you to go work harder

so you can get your dream car, your dream house. That's what it does for me. Whatever. It really does inspire me to go harder. But isn't that the work that we're supposed to be doing? And he's done it. Come on, we doing the Lord's work. That one song has done it for so many people.

Not making this about that song, I'm just using that. Yeah, as an example. But look how quick people can forget. But look how quick people forget. It's crazy. It's crazy. People have real life stuff going on that you have no idea about. And then you just want to tear somebody down.

You want to tear somebody down. Now don't get me wrong. There are some people that have done wrong. That have done some really ugly things. Yeah. And yes, it is our kind of innate reaction to blast them and clown them. But in all things, I think everybody deserves grace. They do. Oh, that's good, Miss Lawrence. I think in everything, everybody deserves grace. And until you can get to that point to extend grace, keep your mouth shut.

Come on now. So that you don't create stripes of your own. That part, because if the same people who are doing that, that will not give other people grace, they forget the grace they've been given. Keep living. And like what if the stuff that you've done was exposed? You know what I'm saying? Keep living.

You want that. Yeah. Keep living. Because you will do something, whether people see it or not, you will do something that is going to set your spirit so uneasy. Yeah. Keep living because you will do something whether people see it or not you will do something that is going to set your spirit so uneasy. Yes. You know. Yeah. Grace, I love that. That is so good. All right. So I want to switch gears a little bit. You went from hairstylist, being a stylist for 20 years to becoming a hairstylles on Real Housewives of Atlanta. Then you ended up being a star on Lee Daniels star. You played Oh, I forgot this. You were so good in this movie.

United States versus Billy. Billy Holiday. So good. Thank you. Yes. And then the movie Bros. What really made you want to tap into the acting part? It all came to me. It fell in my lap. I swear to you, I didn't go after any of it. I did not.

Yes, I was a hairstylist for quite some time. And because I was good at it, one of the best, and I try to stay as modest as possible, but I was one of the best. Did you do hair shows? I used to do the hair shows. I used to do the best. I was battle hit. Did you do hair shows? Ah! I used to do the hair shows. Really? I used to do the hair shows, all of it.

Uh huh. And I garnered a very, an extensive clientele. And one of my clients early on was Sheree Whitfield from Real Housewives of Atlanta. She was a very close friend of mine, or is a very close friend of mine. And when they were starting Housewives,

she asked me to come on the show with her. I didn't think much about it. I'm like, okay, come on in and do your hair. Okay, cool, whatever. I do that anyway. And I did it and I became a fan favorite, so much so that eventually Andy Cohen asked me, would I be interested in doing another show?

And that show was called Fashion Queens that I did with Bevy Smith and Derek J. That was very successful. I love Derek J. Oh my God. Yeah. And it was very successful. We ran for three seasons.

And during that time, Lee Daniels was a fan of Fashion Queens. He and his partner would watch Fashion Queens and I met him one day in Los Angeles and he came and introduced himself to me and he just said he was a fan and he loved the show and for me to tell Bevy Smith he said hello because he and Bevy are friends. Fast forward to one day he reaches out to Bevy and he's like someone told me that Miss Lawrence can sing and she's like oh my god like a bird. Yeah. And he said have him record something and send it to me and I did. I recorded because he was he was entertaining doing a movie on

Sylvester who was an iconic disco artist, legend, icon. And so I went to my hotel room that night and I sang one of Sylvester's song, Mighty Real. And I sent it to Baby and she sent it to him by that Monday when I had got back home from New York. He called me and he was like, oh my God, I didn't know you, he said, I'm gonna do something with you. And I was like, okay, great, I didn't think much about it. Let me tell he's like, Oh my God, I didn't know you. He said, I'm going to do something with you. And I was like, Hey, great.

You know, I didn't think much about it. Let me tell you really quick because I know we're, but. You'll know real when you get it. It'll say eBay authenticity guarantee and you'll feel it. Maybe it's a head-turning handbag, a watch that says it all. Jewelry that makes you look like the gym. Sneakers in streetwear so fresh every step feels fly. When it comes to style and luxury

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unlike any other with eBay authenticity guarantee you can trust that feeling of real is always in reach. Ensure your next purchase is the real deal visit eBay.com for terms. It it was always been kind of hard for me to get really excited off the bat when it comes to stuff like that. Because there's that imposter syndrome. There's those small voices in my head,

I guess you would call it trauma or whatever, that says, oh, you ain't gonna get me so far now, calm down, you ain't gonna get me so far. So it would be hard for me to get excited, but I listen, I'm like, okay, great, I can't wait. Fast forward, he reached out and he says, I'm gonna put you on Empire, I'm gonna put you on Empire. I'm gonna put you on the first episode,

second season of Empire. And I went, I did it. He had me singing Mighty Real on Laying on a Piano in one of the scenes. I got invited to the premiere at Carnegie Hall. And when my scene came up, the room went crazy. And because of the response, as he was creating the show Star,

he created the role for me, Miss Bruce. And from that, when he was developing a writing, the United States versus Billie Holiday, he said, there is a person that was very close to Billie named Miss Freddie. He said, I think you would be great for that role. He said, but you gonna have to audition for this one.

And I said, okay, no problem. And I studied and I studied and I got the job. Thank you. I got the job and that led into the creators of Bros. Billy Eichner and Judd Apatow, all of them, they noticed me and when they were creating the movie Bros, they reached out to my team and had me to audition for that

and so I got that job. And so it all just kind of fell in my lap. So I didn't have, I never had that period of silence. I've always worked from the time I was, my first job, I was 14 years old. I lied on my application and everything to get a job. That's one time you lied. That one time, that one time I did lie everything to get a job. That's one time you lied. That one time.

Now that one time I did lie because I wanted that job. I wanted that job at the gumbo shop at the airport because I wanted to buy my own blouses and lip gloss because my mama would not buy it. So I had to get me a job so I could buy the stuff that I wanted. Right. And so I did lie that time. So I never had a break. And I love working.

Yeah, same. Fast forward to, so that's how it all fell in my lap. That's how my career just kind of fell in my lap. But it was all about divine order, right? Because remember, my original passion was the arts. I love singing, dancing, da da da da. But I abandoned it because listening to the naysayers,

the world was not gonna accept me for that. And probably back then, no, but look where we are. And so I gave the beauty industry 110% of myself. I nurtured that gift. I gave it away. I taught it to seven phenomenal hairstylists that are all very successful right now. And because I did my work and I did my job there, that is the thing that created space and the gift that made room for me to come back to my original passion. Cause had it not been for me being good, had it not been for me being unselfish,

I don't think I would have made it to a housewives that led to a fashion queens, that led to empire, that led to star, that led to United States VersaVilla holiday, that led to bros, that led to the deliverance. United States versability holiday that led to bros that led to the deliverance it wouldn't have been any of that so I my my biggest note to people is nurture the gifts that God gave you don't be selfish with it pour into other people because the more you pour the more you can be filled up and that is the thing that's going to make room for you that's going to make's gonna make room for you.

That's gonna make room for your gifts, for you to grow in places that you didn't think you were gonna be able to go. Cause I had no idea. I had no idea. Now, the challenging part came when we go into a pandemic. Come on now. And ain't no work.

Ain't no work. Now I'm sitting at home. Now I've always had a very healthy appetite for nice things. Me too. Clothes, handbags, jewelry, you know, and I said, okay, ain't no work. How am I supposed to get my things? I'm gonna get my things. I wasn't thinking about bills because those were still, you know, everything was set up on automatic,

I don't know, okay, cool, but how am I gonna get my other stuff? Well, fast forward, it's another year into the pandemic, still ain't no work. So now I'm concerned about bills. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Now I'm seeing them little numbers trickle down

that I at one point had stacked up so high. Oh, I got a bullshit taste, so high. And I said, okay. So then I got into, you know, I had speaking engagements here and there, kept the lights on great. Come out of the pandemic, strike. We going to a strike?

What you talking about strike? Strike? What is the work? Where are my things? Where is my Alexander McQueen? Where's my Chanel? Where's my Vuitton? Where are all of my silly material things? I need it.

Where is it? Then, then Mother's Day of 2023, I woke up to a phone call that my father was not well. Actually, I didn't know my father at the time. My sister called and she's really upset. She's like, you gotta get here. And I get to the house, to my parents house, and my father is on the stretcher and they're working on them. My father, to my knowledge, had always been

very healthy. Not one thing wrong with him. He was, he would have been 80 this year. No, he would have been 80. He would be 81 this year. My daddy was still mowing lawns. He was a workaholic. That's where I know a lot of my work ethics came from. Remember going back to my foundation. Yes. Lo and behold, my father passes away abruptly

on Mother's Day. God, what part of the plan is this? Right. What is going on? What is going on? I now have my mother that I have to take care of, her household. I have to help out with, you know, my niece. That's a lot.

Ain't no work. So now I'm not concerned about my things anymore. I'm now concerned about making sure my mom and them is okay. You know. That's a different type of pressure. Damn me. I'm gonna be I'm gonna figure it out. Yeah. But now how am I about to do this? You know. And I have always been, since a teenager, a late teenager, since I've been working, I have always been a lender.

God has always blessed me to be a lender. Not one time had I ever been put in a borrower's seat. But I have to say that 2023 showed me what it was like to tap into your village, meaning your friends, your chosen family, to allow them as your ointment to rub on you and heal you, to help protect you. I had to be put in a borrower seat so that I can, so that I have a new awareness about what it means to lend on a whole another level once I'm placed back into a lending seat. And it took a while to get that. And it was, someone told me that you're the reason you're still above water and you haven't sink and you won't is because you spent your entire teenage life into your adult

life, pouring, depositing into others. At some point you have to be able to make withdrawals. And so I have been in a season of withdrawing, pulling out of my spiritual savings account. And so the revelation that the Holy Spirit gave me was, it's not even about money. It's not about the material things. It is about the relationships and the connections and utilizing the vessels that I have placed in your life. That's what it is.

And I'm so thankful that I had the experience in 2023. As painful as it was, I'm thankful because my outlook and my optimism on 2024 is unmatched and I've never been here mentally. Wow. I've never been here and been so more assured of what's coming.

You know, I feel like a whole different type of adult. I ain't concerned about that foolishness. I don't keep your bags, keep all of that stuff honey. Cause it's not important. Baby, God showed me that's not important. The same thing happened to me last year during the strike. I think too like when we start making a lot of money the things that we've always wanted it's like oh now I can get it. So now we're like give me that give me that give me that give me that give me that and then once you buy it it's like

okay what else I want and then you go get the cars you want, and you're like, what else? Honey, cause let me tell you something, when life happens, like it did for me, like it did for us, like it did for a lot of people, you sitting at home with all that stuff in your closet, and you can go out and you can fake like everything is peaches and cream, but you so crazy feeling on the inside

and that stuff don't make you feel good. It does not. It does not make you feel good. You might look good. Yeah, you might. I don't look like what I've been through. Right. But that's a gift and a curse

because the more you go out and you don't look like what you going through and you don't know how to open your mouth and tell people about what you going through how you go get help come on now How you go get help? That's real. I had to unlock another level of vulnerability Yeah, and transparency With my friends. Yeah with my closest friends, you know, and now even with strangers. I open my mouth now when I need help. Yes. You have to. Yeah. I love that. And I'm glad you're on the other side of that as well. Yeah. God is good. He is so good. He is at that strike.

And that time it set me down for a minute. And then it made me realize coming out of it, things I thought were so important and just like wanting to look a certain way and oh, I can get this and this is what I really want because I'm into fashion and bags and all the things. And then once I came out of it, I was telling one of my castmates, I was like, you know,

I'm not gonna wear my money as much. I wanna put it in other places. You know, it really opened my eyes to a lot of things. I'm like, I'm spending, like one year I literally spent like $100 thousand dollars just in Neiman's alone. Baby, listen. My rep was so happy. He was like, oh girl. I'm still, that Neiman, my Neiman Marcus charge, cause I'm still paying that down. I'm like, Lord have mercy. Wow. Still paying that down, you know, but you know, I learned that it's not, it's not what's on you, it's what's in you. And if what's in you is right and in alignment

with your purpose, the purpose that God gave you, that's gonna always shine brighter than any Rolex, than any label, than anything. Yep, that's the word. We're gonna leave it on that one. I love that. So good. Thank you. No, thank you.

So we're going to do what we call positive outcomes where the listeners write into us and we give them advice. Okay. All right. So this one says, hey Crystal, I grew up in the church and I want to start off by saying I love God with everything in me. I've always known that I was attracted to women. I'm literally happier than I've ever been that I was attracted to women. I'm literally happier than I've ever been with my fiance who's a woman. Why is it so hard for people to see that

you can love God and be gay? It's literally the hardest thing I've ever dealt with, the judgment by the church. I've lost Christian friends just by coming out. I literally fasted and prayed that God would take it away if it wasn't right. I've struggled with my sexuality my whole life. Last year I came to a crossroads whether I should take my own life or live in my truth. While I'm choosing to live in my truth it's still so hard. Do you have any advice for me on how to navigate my truth and make people accept me for who I am? First of all, thank you so much for writing in. We talked about this. We talked about the judgment of the church and Christians

and how they choose certain things that they wanna be very harsh on when it comes to being judgmental and being against. I would say to you, one, do not go into life wanting to make people accept you. You know, you have to know this is who you are. You've prayed and fasted over this. If this is what you feel is for you,

then you have to go with it. But you are never gonna find happiness seeking acceptance from other people. It doesn't matter what it is. You accept yourself first. Yeah, you have to. You accept yourself first, know God for yourself. Not for, don't understand God based on what somebody else told you who God is.

Understand him and learn him for yourself. And allow him to show up in you, you know, for yourself. And then you ask God to place the people in your life that get it. That get it. And then you go back when you're strong enough. And then you go back and you teach those that was ignorant. You know, you go back and teach because that's our job.

Yeah, that's good. I love that. All right. So next thing we're going to do is what I'm going through and what I'm growing through. And for me on this day, I woke up, I've been very open about this. I'm working on my potty mouth. You know, I have a cousin spirit. And sometimes what I'm working on and the things that I want to, you know, I don't want to talk like that, but sometimes you get around people

you're comfortable with and a video had come out and I was like, I didn't know to talk like that. But sometimes you get around people you're comfortable with and a video had come out and I was like, do you know where I was like, is this bad? And she's like, no, it was funny. And when you watch the whole video, it is actually funny what I'm saying. But I was like, dang, I want people judging.

And I started getting the comments like, well, I've never heard her say that word and I hate that word. And I don't know if I really like her and all these things. And I was just like, oh gosh. I was like, I make a mistake. I'm just like, oh gosh, I was like, did I make a mistake? So for me, it's working on my language

and how I talk and express myself, but also not worrying about what everybody else has to say. You know? 100%. Yeah. Let me ask you a question. Mm-hmm. You don't want to curse anymore, why?

One, because I mean, I feel like the spiritual journey. I'm on right now. I want to feel like I'm completely walking in that, you know, and I was just some things I just need to kind of let go of so let me ask you this because this is something me and and and my friend's mom. Okay, she meant

is it because you have you understood the Bible to say cursing was not right? Because if so, where in the Bible? Is there anywhere in the Bible where I can't curse? Because I know you know it. The Bible only speaks of cursing as it relates to a curse on someone. It doesn't speak on cursing. There's no a curse on someone it doesn't speak on cussing there's no such thing

wow it's another false teaching God did not say that I ain't saying it nowhere oh I don't be cursing at people by the way there's a difference between cursing and cussing we say cursing when we talk about words uh-huh

it means cussing cussing that's it because cursing oh yeah the cursing is a curse I only speak of cursing that's it but not cuss just cussing. Cussing. That's it. Because cursing, oh yeah, the cursing is a curse. That's it. But not on cursing. Placing negative pejoratives on people. I think you just free me from it.

What the, now play it. You know, yeah. Speaking on people in a negative way. No, I don't do that. That's cursing. Yeah. Cussing, somebody just made them worse. What?

Who said that was bad? Like, where the fuck you get that from? Where the fuck you get that from? Now, out of respect to my elders, because they're not there, I don't. I won't cuss in front of my mama. I won't do that. Yeah.

But I'm gonna cuss. And I'm gonna cuss you out sometimes. I'm not gonna curse you. I'm not gonna wish anything bad or ill on you, but I might call you some cuss words. I'm gonna do that. If you cut me off at a light or you do something stupid, you finna be every

MFA you name it. You gonna be all of that. But I think that that that that though is I'd love that you asked her that question because I think that it's a thing of like, is it because you believe that because of the walk that you're on, there's an expectation of perfection or is it because you have the conviction? What is perfection? Yeah, a cancer.

That's what my therapist, she's like, because I used to be like, I'm just perfection, because the Bible says strive for perfection, but she was like, when you're literally trying to be perfect, she was like, it's a cancer. You go drive yourself crazy. Crazy. Go drive yourself crazy. Just be honest. Yeah. Just be honest. That's it. Yeah, you are beautiful woman. You speak well, you're smart, you're talented. That's it. Yeah. That's it. But I could. And you just don't happen to close from time to time. Come on, PK. family and that's a blasphemous language. Come on PK. It's pretty much giving emphasis on something in which you're deterred by. So if you're saying a **** or whatever you're saying, it's like I'm giving emphasis on it, but it's still addiction. like, I'm passionate about this and I really want you to know what I'm trying to get across. So yeah.

What about you, Ms. Lawrence? What are you going through and what are you growing through? I am going through a growth spurt right now. And it's not, it's uncomfortable, but in a good way. Because I have opened up new areas that I've never tapped into in my life that I'm excited about. So I'm growing to, you know,

venture into new business arenas, into real estate, into, you know, a deeper level or a bigger level of entrepreneurship, all of that, and growing pains comes with that. And the growing pain part is, you know, having to really exercise your faith, which is believing and seeing the things that are not there yet.

You know, but you know it's happening. And so you just keep walking towards it because you see it, you see it, but you know, in your mind, you don't have, we think, the enemy will make us think that we don't have you rethink the enemy will make us think that we don't have the necessary tools to get there but it's there is that that's the growing pain part yeah yeah yeah but I am I am growing into a new level of abundance that I am so excited about. We love that word. Yeah, because I am now a more aware and responsible individual.

I will now be more responsible with my gifts and my fruit. Yeah, come on now. Yeah. That's good, I love that. Oh my gosh, I'm taking all that. That's good, I needed that. And thank you for helping with that whole cussing. You're welcome.

That was good. I'm not telling you to go on Instagram, I'm like, yeah, I'm ****, yeah, I'm ****, yeah. As soon as we hit, I was like... But I don't want you, you know, beating yourself up because you might be online and you might say a cuss word here and there. What? We human.

Right, yeah. You're right. Yeah. Right, yeah, you're right. So to close it out, we say, we fill in the blank of keep it blank, sweetie. And this week, and based on what we've been talking about, I'm going to say, keep it graceful, sweetie. Have grace with yourself and grace with others. Yeah. I'm just, I'm gonna have to say keep it honest. I love that. Yeah. Keep it honest. That is it. Oh my goodness, ladies and gentlemen, Miss Lawrence, you've been amazing. This was amazing. Thank you. Oh, your energy was just

phenomenal. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. I love this. Yes. All right, guys. Thank you so much for tuning in. If you want to write into our open listener letter, please write it to keepitpositivesweetie at gmail.com. That is Sweetie with an I-E. You can follow me on all platforms at lovecristorenet. That's L-U-V-cristo-renet. Miss Lawrence, tell the people where they can find you.

You can find me on all social media platforms at misslaurance, and that's M-I-S-S Lawrence. Love it. L-A-W-R-E-N-C-E. Oh yeah, let him know. There we go. All right, we'll have that on the bottom too. Make sure you guys tap in with him. Thank you so much. Thank you. Seriously. In the meantime, in between time, you guys know what to do. Keep it positive, sweetie. heavenly father. We thank you so much for this moment. Father God, we thank you for bringing us together today. We thank you for bringing Miss Lawrence and Carl here safely. Lord, we just ask Father God that you bless this time together. Lord, open up Miss Lawrence's and crystals heart. Father God, so that they can speak openly to the people, vulnerable

to the people. Father God, so that they may receive what you want them to hear, Lord. And we just ask you to guide their tongue, their speech, their hearts, Father God, as they share openly and vulnerably. We thank you for this time together and may it glorify you. In your name we pray. Amen. Amen.