Keep it Positive, Sweetie - Higher is Waiting with Tyler Perry

Episode Date: September 12, 2023

Season 2 Episode 1 | Welcome back SWEETIES! I am so excited to have my big brother, boss, and one of my biggest inspirations, Tyler Perry, on the couch. Ya’ll have no idea how monumental this moment is for me — for US! We talked about everything from his upbringing, to fear, my man issues and more! Get your notebook out for these notes, because he dropped so many gems.

Hello and welcome to this episode of Keep It Positive, sweetie guys. I am so excited about this episode. I have none other than my boss, the biggest boss. Multi-hypn, you are an author, You are a writer, a director, a philanthropist, a father, everything. Tyler Perry, my God. Hey. Hey.

How you doing, anything? Like, I literally feel like this is my first time doing this. I was so nervous. I could like, That's so crazy because we talk all the time. All the time. Isn't it crazy? Yeah, yeah, shit.

I just wanted to make you proud and do this right. I'm already proud. I'm already proud of the other episodes. I'm proud at the title. You got to tell me how they came about. Oh, okay. Yeah, keep positive. Yeah, keep positive.

How they come about? It came about because I had a young lady. I actually had posted a young woman's work who helped me organize my closet. And this woman got on, she was like, all this bragging and boasting, you need to go buy some land or a house. I said, I had time.

Normally I ignore, block, delete. Oh, we got time today. My little fingers got turned and I was like, I said, what you should look is, I'm supporting another woman's business. And not looking at it from a negative standpoint. I just look at hashtag, keep it positive, sweetie. Oh, okay.

And it grew legs. My fans were like, it just like literally, crazy. Denora, we were trying to come with a title for the podcast and she's like, I heard about I think of you, I think of abundance. And in that moment, I was like, at the back of my head, I said, what if it's not always like this? Yeah, abundant.

What if my life isn't, it was crazy. Glad to got to you thinking about it. And what if your life wasn't always, isn't always like this? What if it wasn't always? Because abundance, she's like, every time I think of you, I think of abundance. And a part of me was like, but what if it's not like this? Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. And now we know where that came from. Uh-huh. Okay. Yeah. We can get into that. We can definitely get into that. Yeah. That is clearly

just that unfethered fear from childhood or something that somebody said to you or something that somebody planted in you that immediately make you think this isn't going to last always. Yes. And that is a horrible, horrible sinking feeling and it's also a lie. But it can serve you well because it can motivate you to keep going and work even harder. Yes. So that's what I used to do for you. Yes.

I don't hear no more. I'll let hear it. I don't hear it anymore. I don't hear it anymore. I'm not hearing it anymore. I think I'm all right now. You are all right, Eddie. You are all right. So we were brainstorming. I was like, you know, I want to do a little segment

on the show called Keep a Positive Sweetie. And they're like, that's the name of the show. The name of the show. And that's how I came up with it. That's great. I don't like addressing haters, but that's good. I'm glad something great came out of it. Because people, you know, in social media in this world, they're sitting around, nothing to do,

and what you have to understand about people who post negative things like that, their algorithms in social media, if you click on something negative, you're only going to get fed negativity. So the negativity is showing up in their lives within other things. Wow. And if you keep letting that stuff in, everything negative, everything negative, everything gossip, everything business,

your life is going to become that. So I'm very much about keeping it positive, sweetie. And stay it and stay in, and staying clear of all of that foolishness. Yeah. You do a really good job of it. I try to, I try to. I don't let it in. I'll stop if somebody starts talking about somebody staying clear of all of that foolishness. Yeah. You did a really good job of it. You did. I tried to.

I don't let it in. I'll stop if somebody says talking about somebody in front of me. It got something like nothing. We don't do that here. You could cut it off quick. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I love that about you. That's why when I know they talking about me,

you're not gonna let them talk about me. No, no. No. I'm gonna say, I'll fight somebody over you now. No, no, no. Somebody tell me somebody's in trouble. It's you will. If somebody's in trouble. You will. If somebody's in trouble.

And if you're telling me something because there's a situation that we need to help, that's different. That's different. But not just to be known. If you've got no solutions to what people are going through, no offering, trying to help, don't bring that to me. Nope.

No, that's real. I love it. I love it. I want to do a little story time. We're going to go back to when we first started. Yes. When I first started working in Tyler Perry Studios as a PA, the first thing they told me, do not look at him and nod. Don't speak to him when you see him. No, do that. I was like, okay. And I don't, you know, I don't even know what year was this because 2012. I'm going into 13. We started having have not who was starting

all this shit. It's crazy. I mean, can I can I say shit don't keep you absolutely? Okay, who was starting all this shit because I hear rumors Two of the oh, oh don't look don't talk to don't I'm like what are y'all where does this come from? I don't know somebody told you that yes That was like a part of like my getting the ropes learning the ropes like so if you ever see him like don't go on the elevator And it reminded a capital hill when I worked on the like, if you see a senator on the elevator, do not go on. If they're on the train, go into the Capitol, wait.

And I had an Obama incident where I was running, trying to get some papers to the floor of the Senate. And he was on the train. And I was like, trying to get on there real quick. And I saw him and I ran back. He said, come on. And I was like, you sure he's like, yeah, come on. I was like, thank you.

Out of brands, I was like, Laura, but it reminded me of that, where it's certain rules. I was like, maybe that's just the thing. I was like, Lord, but it reminded me of that where it's certain rules. I was like, maybe that's just the thing. So one morning, we were walking, everybody points, okay, that's where his office is. This is where catering is. I was like, okay. And maybe a few weeks in,

we were walking past each other on sidewalk. You were coming, going to said, and I was going to get some coffee probably for someone at that point in time. And I just said, just speak. That's how you erase. You don't walk past, you acknowledge people when you see them. So I just said, good morning. And you spoke back and I just said just speak that's what how you raise you don't walk past you acknowledge people when you see them so I just said good morning and you spoke back and I was like it was like a movie like if somebody had a like a

camera it would have been so funny to see my reaction like he spoke back and I was like it was complete opposite of what everybody said I know it and and that's why I wanted like in the beginning I was like that's why force people to say hi now because I'll see you walking I forced people to say hi now, because I was seeing, walking, I'm like, hey, how you doing? You all right, because I don't know, if somebody's still telling you all that, that's not so, because I check in,

I wanna know how people are doing it. I was stopping the hallway and talking to you, you know, how's your mom, how things are going? You will, yeah. You complete opposite of what I was told, and I just, I love it, it was a complete opposite. I'm just thinking capital hill to here. Mm-hmm. Okay, go ahead, go ahead capital hill to here. It's not lost on me.

Go ahead. Go ahead. And then I worked my way up and a lot of people are always like, how did you, and Todd become so close, how did you even start working for him? How that even happened? And do you remember when we were doing Soul Cycle at Greenbrier? Yes. And I came up to you and said, we need more money for the cost of them.

Yes. And I was so scared, because we hadn't really, it was always just good morning, sir. Yep. Keep moving. And something was like, just tell him, because he has no idea. Yep.

And I'm talking about within hours, accounting was up in the department, figuring out how we can get more money to get more people out of help us, because the way we shoot, we needed that some good, good help. good help and you were like literally you were like we'll make it happen. Yeah because because the the thing that people forget it I can't see everything I can't be everywhere so it takes somebody bold enough to say hey you working we're all working side by side we're working really really fast we need the help And not everybody would do that.

And there'll be people in departments who are suffering who are shorthanded because accounting saying no, there's other person saying no, nobody's told me. Yeah. Yeah. So I was, I was glad you said it. Yeah, you made me feel very comfortable.

I was like, okay. And I don't, sometimes you're like, because why you didn't say nothing? I'm like, oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's so big. But that was the thing where I was like, I need to talk to him. I was so scared. And that was just another instance where you literally was like so cool. Like if people look at you because you're six, six, you're like, this giant is like, oh gosh,

like how do I even approach this man? Like you pro-dare everybody. But there's just another testament to like how you just make things happen, and you're like very. When people make me wear of it, yeah, because it's really important to me working that hard. That's what so many people love working at the studio because it's a, we move. We do. But we are still together. I'm right there with them side by side in the trenches.

So it makes it all just, we see everybody pushing in the same direction. That's why we've been able to do what we do. Absolutely. And it starts with you, because I remember even as a PA just coming on a set sometimes and we're all exhausted. Everybody's working these hours and you're right there with us from sun up to sun down.

And it's like, this man ain't got to do this. No. No. No. You can literally be on your island or one of your properties. No way. So. I don't have to be here.

Literally. But I love it. It's inspiring though, because it made me go harder. And I was like, okay, if I see this man who's already made it and doesn't have to be here. Literally, but I love it. It was inspiring though, because it made me go harder. And I was like, okay, if I see this man who's already made it, and doesn't have to do this, work this hard, I really gotta go hard. And it just inspired me. And you did.

I did. It started working for me. And Chris, the running behind me with my shoes, going on GMA, we hear somebody's schedule, see if we should show them some of the schedule stuff to do it was it was insane and up promoting a movie or something and there you are we're up up at going to bed at three up at up at 5.30 getting things ready and yeah big feet too so the shoes is heavy but

you know the thing the thing about it though that really moved me is just how much you honored the job and what you were supposed to do. That to me spoke volumes, because anybody who comes in and just, you know that their passion is what they're doing. I don't even know you had another dream. No, you didn't.

I had no idea you had no dream. Tell them about the audition. I had auditioned for a role on If Love and Years Wrong, and then also for Erica on Having Have Nights. Actually, it was Darcy on If Love and Years Wrong, and Erica, who played, she was one of the young ladies on Having Have Nights audition for those, didn't get any of them.

You were working with me every day, holding my clothes, went through the proper channels to audition, and didn't get the role. And when you asked me to style you, because that was when I was just like working in costumes, Tyler, I would literally, we would be a ingering buyer. My agent was sending me an audition. I would run upstairs, find something in the back back,

remember you said that big warehouse behind the costume department of stairs? I would find something that fit that character, changing to it, run downstairs, tape it, running it, lunch, run upstairs, change back, go back to work, literally grinding, trying to figure it out, even auditioning for stuff for you.

And once you asked me to be your stylist, I was like, this man don't think I can act. And I had no idea. You had no idea. I had no idea. I thought there was a way of saying, you can't do this, but I got something. But come on my shoes.

Yeah, hold my shoes. Oh, let me show you the world. No, no, no, no. No, but I had no idea because nobody ever told me. And I don't know why nobody told me that you auditioned. That's crazy. That is crazy. Until sisters, when you again,

because this you speak to anybody watching, about having the boneness to speak up, like the boneness that started us talking was you saying we needed help. The boneness of you actually getting the role of a team of started with you saying, I really would like to try to do this. Yeah, I'm like, oh, okay, first time.

I'm hearing it, I'm thinking, and I remember what it told you. Yeah, it's, yeah, it's gonna, I'm not gonna give you anything, it's gonna be small. And what you do with it is, Yep, if I give it to you, better kill it. You better kill it.

And I was like, I will not let you down. And the first day, I remember you shooting in a blue dress on Sisters, and I remember all of, was it blue or black? But all I remember is all of the crew coming forward, you know. Just, just to support you. Yes, it was so beautiful. Yeah, but our members, all of the crew coming forward. So just to support you. Yes, it was so beautiful.

Yeah, but that tells the world the kind of person you are that all you think, think how many of them co-workers gonna go to support you or something. All your co-workers came down. And when you finished just seeing they were all applauded. Yelling, we all did jump.

I have actually have footage that still on my phone. Oh, you should put that in the cut of it. You ready, Crystal? This is but don't get in there. This is my costume designer who wants to be an actress. And she just got casted for her first role at Tyler Perry's studio, where dreams come true. That's right.

And action. This is Farms. He's still in line to see you. And he said to bring the things. Yeah, friends, oh, yeah, friends, oh, yeah! It's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it's a brine, it I'm gonna get you a girl! I'm gonna get you a girl! I'm gonna get you a girl! Alright! Alright! But what's beautiful about it is I sat in a corner going,

hmmm. Oh no, no, no, that's something else. That's not just talent, that's not just acting, that's not, that's something else, that's something that is anointed, that is special, that is called for that particular purpose. And I'm always looking for that. So when I saw it, I was like, okay, I see.

Same way with Cassie and LeVan, we were on tour, and I'm in the Medea costume. We'd really go on stage, and I looked at them, sitting over the corner, I said, I'm going to sit here with you, too. Wow. I'm going to do House of Pain. I got to go, hello. Walk out over the corner. I said, I'm gonna do a sitcom with you too. Wow. I'm gonna do House of Pain. I gotta go. Hello. Walk out of the city.

And we did House of Pain. You know, all those episodes. All these years later, still going. Yeah. Hope my show does that. I totally 100% believe it will. And whatever it is, if it doesn't, you're gonna be in abundance.

I mean, we're only doing. We're only doing. Say what we want. We're doing. Hey, I love that. And even when I called you that day, I was still styling you to ask you about just to let you know this is what I wanted to do. Just to speak to who you are as a friend. You were backstage getting ready to go on to do your farewell tour. I thought you had the day off because it was so many days that

the calendar was really small. So I was like, okay, he off the day. So I called you and thinking you were off and you weren't. And you literally answered the phone and I was like, hey, what are you doing? And you're like, I'll just sit in backstage waiting to go and I was like, oh, I'll call you back. And you're like, no, what's up? And I was like, you don't know this,

but I'm reading the scripts and it's literally the stories I'm just jumping off the pages. And I was like, I really want to give this a shot. And you were like, I love this idea. I'm gonna call you back, one of the, it's in, hello. It's right, let me go back cause I got a walk on stage.

But the fact that you took the call, you know what I'm saying, that's easy to like, that's just type of framework. Cause some people are like, I call them back, you know? But as busy as you are, even when you're working, you still make time for your people. Of course. I just want people to know that that's who you are.

Okay, good. Cause there's like a lot of people think that you're just, as even, they for your people. Of course. I just want people to know that that's who you are. Okay, good, good. Because there's a lot of people think that you're just, as even, they don't know you on a personal level. They just see this huge giant man who just does so many great things and it's so talented, but like on a real personal, no, you are really that, you're available to your people. I appreciate it.

And I love you for that. I appreciate it. I love you too Chris. Thank you. That's people, that's because people always look at where you are. they look at the top. They're like, oh wow, look up there, look up there. They don't look at all the steps that it took to get there for how the bottom all exists.

Wow, you're all the way up there. No, look at all of that. That's the journey. It is the journey. Yeah, that's the journey. Yeah, wow. Was there any time in your life, like as you continue to climb, that you're like, whoa, even where you are now, billionaire, established new studio, still expanding,

you have the biggest studio right now, bigger than, I feel like it's in the United States period, you have yours as a large. The land mass, yeah. The land mass, yeah. So is there any time, as you're... Well, maybe pinewood, maybe pick it, but anyway, go ahead.

Yeah. Is there any time where you're maybe pinewood maybe pick it but anyway go ahead. Yeah, yeah Is there any time where you hit moments where you like ooh like God cannot go higher because you have a book Higher is waiting, but do you ever even doubt yourself like no at 53? I've had enough experiences to know that that I Have to surrender. When I bought my first studio, I thought, okay, this is great, I'm not building a studio,

I got, it's paid for, I grew it. Next studio, same thing. I grew it in no time, then it's Greenbrier. I thought I'd be there forever. I grew that thing, we were on top of each other in that building. We were. But what I learned is that every time I was supposed to move to the next level, and I didn't, because I was comfortable,

because I didn't want to pay more. I didn't want to grow. I thought I was where I wanted to be. Everything in my life got uncomfortable until I moved. So I completely, I take all right open it. Everybody all right. So I completely, I completely learned the hard way. Like Jason point, the Crock Street market right now, which was my first big studio on Crock Street. I was, I was hired at these bootleg carpenters to come in and fix it up and all

this other stuff. And I was, I was like, good, I got this building, I paid for it. This is where I'm going to make my studio. That thing wasn't even as big as the stage one is, right? Right. So, so I'm there trying to force it and ended up on the news. I'm Monica Kaufman, our Richard Belcher talk about, chapter two news, Tyler Perry's building a whole studio without permits. I tell you, so I was just like, I was so devastated because I had hired this guy to do a job

and the message came to me very clear. You're too big to do it wrong. Oh! Too big to do it wrong. You gotta do it right. You gotta do it right. You gotta do it right. I was still, still pushing for, try to make it work.

The neighbors started complaining every, we didn't have enough parking. It was only parking for maybe 80 cars. And I was mad. And I didn't want to go. And so when my lawyer called me and told me about Greenbrite, I went over there. And I was like, I want to be over here.

I went laid down, couldn't sleep, went over there late in night, and I was praying about it. And I looked closely at the gates, and it was, because it's all padded locked and chained up, and the gates had Bible scriptures on it. The songs 91, my favorite scripture was on the gate. And I was like, okay, God, I get it. So I bought it, thought I would not grow it, but I did. But right after that, out growing it,

here comes this offer for Fort McPherson. You know, I told him, I called the mayor and said, I'm leaving, I'm gonna move to Douglasville. He said, no, no, no, I want you to come see Fort McPherson. When I walked into Fort McPherson, the first thing I thought was, oh, I'm supposed to do this. Wow. It wasn't where I had been before with the thought of,

oh gosh, let me just get paid for this. I had to learn to be open to where I was going and build for where I was going rather than living and being closed and staying where I was, right? So understanding that through some hard trials, I learned to just surrender when it shows up. Wow. I want to touch on something that you've

helped me in my personal life when it comes to going higher. When we've been told about me. No, not yet. We're going to get better. OK, OK, OK. I'm going to get better. Yeah, because we talked about it. Relationships.

Yes, yes. But it was in my living, it was, we were shooting, I want to say, Medea, maybe in Halloween, the second one, one of the movies. And I was still styling, we were in the bathroom, changing Medea's wardrobe, and you were like, where are you living? And I said, oh, I'm written a townhouse. And you were like, okay, you're on it. And I said, no, and he goes, you need to go buy a house.

And I was like, well, sir, the way we work, I was like, we work and then we save our money to live and we're not working. It's hard to save when you're just like living, you know, saying basically, you live in paycheck to paycheck. And you were like, okay, well, how much is a house? And I was like, well, the ones I'm looking at, like, would be like, two, five to three hundred thousand.

And you were like, what, how much is a damn pavement? I was like, like, the ones I'm looking at, like, would be like $2,000, $250,000, $300,000. And you're like, what happens to their pavement? I was like, if you put 10% down, you may do like $15,000, between $20,000, $15,000. And you're like, OK, it's the way you wait no. I was like, well, you go get your house. And it was in that moment, I was like, good Lord. What about go get your house? So I got that house house and I came back to

it instead of had we by the end it was we were shooting having have nots because we we moved on to the next project. You like Chris a guy you she got a house he's like I give you four years you'll be in a mansion within four years I don't know if you remember saying that we were on set you called me and you like it's time to be out there a little apartment. He called my townhouse in the apartment. Yeah a four bedroom three and a half bath. He called my townhouse in the apartment. A four bedroom, three and a half beds, three. It was beautiful, it was beautiful, but I knew,

again, in my life, what I learned and what I understood was, be open when it shows up. That's not arrogance, that's not anything. There's so many people who, I know, I've met in this lifetime being, having been very poor and now doing very well, who on that side of it, they never apologized for.

We as black people constantly apologize when we have something good. Like you talk about the lady who talk about stop showing off, you should be, you should be. See, that's somebody who don't even understand that it's based on the experiences of what we have done as black people in this country, the things our ancestors did, our success has already been bought and paid for. If we could get our mentality around what that means,

you wouldn't walk around apologizing for. I know that's right. And you taught me to live unapologetically. Yes, it's okay. And even when I was living in a scarcity mindset, you like, Chris, I know you feel like you just got through the door or just one foot. You're in the door.

You're right. You're all right. Go get what you want. And I was like, why don't I know if I can, you like, stop living like that. Because you said that you would go by what you could afford. I know I can handle this. And then you're in there for two years.

And you're like, I should've just got what I wanted. Because God continued to multiply, multiply. I'd be like, I should've just got what I wanted. Cause God continued to multiply, multiply, to like, I could've just got what I wanted. Yes. And many times in my life, I've been in a situation. What about this? Why am I, why am I, why am I, I do, when that's right there?

Yes. Yes. So you help me to one dream bigger, to open my lens and be like, okay, I can do this. And every time I go higher, my life just makes room. It makes room. My ideas get bigger. The money it comes and it's never like,

okay, I haven't how about take care of this. No, there you go. And then you realize after four years, you go, and I just breeze through that. I wasn't even, that wasn't even a stretch. Because your mind became open to the possibility of what it could be. Yes, yes.

But that also comes with exposure. I'm a young girl from Martin Tennessee, population 10,000 people, like super small. And you have one, I remember the first time you invited me to the island. And I was sitting at the table with everybody. And I don't know if you could feel the timidness and you were like, if you're at this table it's because you belong. And I remember one more and just

walk around just touching the leaves. I'd never seen an island, a private island, a private island. I've been on island, but not an island like that. And I was like, this man, this is his own island. Like, just watch. If I, I don't even need all this, like, this is possible. Yeah. Then that's exposure, you know what I'm saying? Just knowing that I know somebody who has done it. This is something I can do as well. And the places you take me, we travel the world together, has opened my eyes to so much where a lot of people aren't privy to seeing.

You know, you buy a couple things, but that travel in the world. But, but, but let me just say this thing, I'm going to travel the world. Oprah, Oprah did that for me. When I first went to her house, she did it for me. I was like, but, but let me just say this thing I'm going to travel world. Oprah, Oprah did that for me when I first went to her house. She did it for me. I was like, Oh, this is possible. You can actually dream and be, and I've never forget I'm on video saying this. I'm probably 35 at the 36. My first movie

had just come out. And I was just like, Oh, I could have this. It took all of the rains and blinders off. And I was just like, Okay, God, what you got? Yeah. I'm gonna do the best I can to honor it. I'm gonna be good to people. I'm gonna, everybody comes in my life. I'm gonna make sure that they are touched

and affected in a beautiful way, that their lives have changed, that they're really sea and dream. I'm, everything you show me, God, I'm gonna try to pass it on to somebody else. And everybody who can get it, I'll take it, right? So that's the feeling I want the you show me got. I'm gonna try to pass it on to somebody else and everybody who get it, I'll take it, right? So that's the feeling I want the people around me to have that's the feeling I want the people at the studio to have because at this point was what else is

What else is there to do exactly exactly that's so good. Yeah, that's having the world just like She don't like roaches that traveling the world just like she don't like roaches. So we went boar boar. Really nice. So do y'all know them beautiful places over the water? Yeah, little bugle. It was nice. So, if you walk in a hotel, that's very expensive.

And there's Roach Spray in the closet. Something something's up. So. I didn't catch that. Yeah. I didn't read the road. As soon as I walked in, I saw that roast spray because the place of view for the glass bottom look a lot. I was like, okay, I put 100 one without Chris doing the hard room.

Screams. Just scream. You do the z-jokes, you go to the roaches. You don't do the roaches. I do not do roaches. I was like, they're like, the people came in the room that manager and he's like, oh, I'm talking about y'all, it was a big roast.

He was like, oh, this is a water book. I said, no, that's a cockroach. We from the South. And we get a was here. That's a cockroach. Y'all got to get that thing. Yeah. Y'all came in there moving furniture for me. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. First of all, it's hot and here. It's iron arrow. Turn arrow. Yeah. Yep. Or in time of sent-be I said Beyonce, she's ready to go. Oh my gosh. The first time I took me. I was in Miami, you guys on a vacation. I like to travel by myself sometimes, and then my girls come meet me after I've had

my meet time. And so it was before my girls landed. And I had unpacked. I was standing in Miami for a while. I had unpacked my clothes and I never do that. I never unpacked and hang things up. I just live out the suitcase. This particular while. I had unpacked my clothes and I never do that. I never unpack and hang things up. I just live out the suitcase. This particular trip, I had unpacked and I get a call.

He's like, hey, I need you to pack some things for me. I've got to go to Copenhagen. And I was like, okay. And I said, okay, I'll get some things done. So I had called Armani as I have money. Can you face him? He's like, you can help me this. I'm not in town.

And then I get another call. And he was like, well, I get another call and you were like, well, I need you to pack your things too because we're going to see Beyonce. Y'all, I ain't never packed, I ain't never got to the airport that fast. I called you back. I called you back.

I called you back. Because I know you had friends, I know you had packed. I call you back. I say, so you think you go, you go, I'm at the airport. I'm like, I'm going back. I'm going through security. I'm you back. I said, so you think you go, I'm at the airport. I'm going through the car and I'm going back. I'm going to be away. And that was the most amazing experience.

We flew on your jet to Copenhagen. I got to meet Beyonce for the first time. Y'all like, do we need a landing pass? She gonna faint. What's going to happen? Oh my goodness. And that was just, that was crazy. Thank you for the many experiences. But that and that was just, that was crazy.

Thank you for the many experiences, but that was that when it started. Exposure. Exposure. That's what I completely love and hope that more of us have. And it doesn't take, you don't have to travel the world to, you could just get out of your neighborhood, go to other neighborhoods, see other things.

Like when I was struggling and broke, and in my 20s, I barely had nickel or anything to eat, but I would go to an open house, and in the nicest neighborhoods, and I would drive test drive cars, just not for the materialness of it, but just to know it's possible. Yes.

And because in my neighborhood, there was the drug boys or the preachers, the only ones doing well. Wow. So I didn't see anybody else that, you know, was in the movie business or anything. I didn't see any of that. So coming to Atlanta, really opened my mind up to the possibility of there are other things you can be other than those two.

Absolutely. Wow. That's good. Something else that I have learned from you is generosity. I've always just naturally just been a nice person, speak to everybody. But it was, first it was Andy Norman, who we love, works at the studio.

We love him, but he's my right hand over there. Oh my goodness, love him. And he called me one day, he always goes to church on Wednesdays. And he said, I don't know why God put you on my spirit. But he told me to tell you you're living is in your giving. He said, I don't know what this why what it was. And at this time, I was I was in costume designing. I was just a costume. So that you know, that's just like, okay, what does that mean you know he's like your living is in your giving. So we take a break I get a call from Ozzy who was the president at the time and he goes hey talk on me to call you to see if you be interested in costume designing the

next season of shows. And I was like oh that's that's a big, it was a big job like I don't know if I'm ready for this. If I'm prepared, and I end up praying about it, and I end up taking the job. And when I walked in for my first day, Andy was like, I didn't know where you were going, or what was it about? He said, but you're going higher. And I was like, Andy, this is crazy.

And he's like, don't forget what I said. And he always reminds me, and I never forget that. But just being around you and styling you for the years, I styled you and actually getting a close up look at how you run things the way you give silently. People don't even know the half of the things you do. Because you can be sitting in your living room watching TV. I'm like, I want to help that lady.

And figure, find her. I want to help her rebuild whatever. You know what I'm saying I want to help her rebuild whatever you know what I'm saying. You always bless people and I remember it was during COVID and you called me and you said, hey, I just want to check on you. Are you good? Because we weren't working. You wanted to make sure I was I was okay. I said, no, it's how you take good care of me. I'm good. And in turn, I turned around and called Herman. Remember what he told us to throw.

And it just that's I feel like when you're around somebody, your caliber, those are the things you need to take from them. Like learning how to, that was a valuable thing for me. This man, he just gives freely and with a cheerful heart. And that was one of the things I was like, when I'm in this position, because I would already do it, when we come back to work out by people lunch, because I knew they weren't having been working for a while, so I would do what I could do. You know what I couldn't buy a car.

No, that's the same, that's the same thing, though. Giving doesn't have a value when it comes from a pure place. It could be $10 billion, it could be two pennies. It doesn't have a value when it comes from puring. Yeah. Giving is about what it does for the other person. Exactly, and I learned that from you. So I just, that what it does for the other person. Exactly. And I learned that from you.

So I just, that's another thing. Like, being around you, I've learned so many things. Just even how to carry myself. Because a lot of times, you don't know why guys put me around someone. I had no idea why you chose me. Or why guy put it on your heart to be like, her, I want her to come and help me with this. But in that, it was literally molding me to be able to sit in the space I'm in now and to be able to carry it. And you know what I'm saying?

That's why everyone who is around somebody who they are wondering, like I was around people like Oprah and T.D. Jakes and I was like, these people are so amazing. How am I? What am I? What is this about? But they were there to teach me something. And I watched the grace of how they carried themselves.

Yes. I watched the compassion. And I watched how they treated everybody around them. You know, all people want to do is be seen and heard. Right. So if you sometimes that's all they need. Yeah. And so when I'm helping someone, and as you said,

most of it's private because the world don't need to know it. But there are moments where people want to know it. And then there are moments where I say, okay, people shouldn't know this because there's so much hell in the world right now. So let's see, see how much good this can support. Yes, exactly.

But it's really, really important to be able to have what you have and be or have an open hand and heart to help other people. Yes. I get that from my mother. I mean, I would wake up when I was a kid and step out of the bed. I would step on somebody on the floor. Like, who would these people? She's like, they need to replace the state, right?

So she would, she wouldn't give me no money, but she would, she would, you know, you're going to get $20 out of my mother. But she would feed them. she would clothe them, she was just amazing. I love it, I love it. You talk about your mother, I know she's someone who holds a dear, dear place in your heart. And you've talked about the dysfunction of your home growing up.

What was it with that little boy? Because you say in your book, hire is waiting. You say that ever since I was a little boy, I've known there was something greater than myself, something bigger, something stronger, something higher. Yeah. I know for me as a kid, living in Martin, Tennessee, I didn't see anything that got it put in my mind.

I didn't see anything that even reflected that. I'm like, so why do I feel like I can, I only saw it on TV. What was it with that little boy living in New Orleans? It was like, it's something bigger for me than this. That was the most frustrating part of my life and career is having all of that vision inside and did not sing a path, not sing anybody else who had done it,

not sing anybody around. I was just like, how is this even possible for me to obtain this? But for me, my mother took me to church all the time. So I just would hear my uncle preaching about, you know, if you pray God will answer your prayers. And I just believed from a little boy that God was answering my prayers, especially when I got these. I thought that the television, Floor Moutlet television, y'all don't know what that is. Oh, I do.

Floor M, my television. I thought that the people inside on Gilligan's Island, the TV show, were inside the TV, and I wanted to go behind it and open it up and find them. And my father would have killed me though. So I prayed, I said, God, send me some little people to take care of. And I'm leaving school, I come home, and there's a house, a bamboo house, sitting on the porch, the lady across the street had left, had moved away, and she asked my mother if I could have her parakeets,

P.P. and Pierre, and they spoke. So as a little boy, I'm like, God, heard my prayer. They heard it. Yeah, so from then on, from then on, it was like, okay, this prayer thing works. It works, yeah, it's prayer, you can still work. Yeah, yeah, okay, this prayer thing works. It works. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. just doing something. Yeah, I like to ask that question, because a lot of times when people see us where we are now,

it's like where did that start? So I definitely wanted to touch on that. I know, you can't just say this about God. If they don't know, the world is changing and people are getting away from so many things. And it makes sense because of what church has become. But my whole hope is that if people have a relationship with God in believing that they never, ever equate that

to something that man is, because they will always let you down. Preacher, pastor, priests will always let you down. They are not God. They are human. They're allowed to be flawed. They're allowed to make mistakes. You have my business.

So, so, I give them the grace of being human. But when I need grace, I go to God, not for them. Absolutely. I just literally, just yesterday, had this conversation with my brother, Marquis. And he was like, you know, I just church hurt. He was like, I just don't feel, I just don't want to go through this again. And I was like, I literally told my Sam Marquis, I was like, the pastor is not a guy. I was like, he's human just like we are.

I said, we're going to church to get close to the guy. If that person is delivering the message the way you need it, we have to get them grace in their personal life. Like we can't judge that. Or they're in your business. You know, if God sends a message and you know when that message is yours, coming through that person,

you know God spoke to you through that person. It's easy to start to see the person as God and miss the spirit that came through. Yes. Listen, I've gotten messages from Wino's on the street that was like, oh, that was God just spoke to me. Uh-huh. So I've learned to completely be when you when you listen and you're open and you hear, you know, you know. Because in my life, if I pray something, and I have friends who are praying for me, a prophet like Andy will do you,

God will send somebody to confirm the exact prayer, the exact thought, the exact thing I'm going through, almost in the exact words, and I go, okay, yeah. Did Norich, he's talking to me. He all in your business. Oh, right. Right. What you been listening to? Right, right.

So good. So good. So I was talking about something that you would not talk about. My man. Oh, no. Oh, you got it. My man, my man, my man.

So for the longest, you see me go through different relationships. And recently, it was a night that we all went to dinner after you moderated Michelle Obama's book tour here in Atlanta. And you said, Crystal, you are vibrating here. Your man is here. And I was like, oh, you trying to tell me I'm a little vibrational Tyler? But each time I say, and I was like, oh, I had to think about that. I was like, wow, like, am I, you know what I'm saying?

You were like, you're here. He's up here, you gotta go higher. You know, you get to find him, yeah, yeah. And I was like, wow, that's crazy. I was, I was probably had a gummy that night. So I was, I look, I give super spiritual when I'm on gummies, but that sound good. Okay, go ahead.

He was real good. Just five milligrams a week, so like I do. You know, if I try anything else, I'll be like, no, no, y'all come get me I'm going to hospital. Five milligrams. Good, it's an awesome. Yeah, five milligrams.

But understanding, yeah, and having people meet you at your worth. That's why I was, yeah. So when you said that, we were, one of our many nights at your island island, in the King's Landing Room, at the table, you said, you just hit you, you probably was on the government there, too, you was like, meet me at my word,

we were all like, wow, that's it, that's it. And anybody who can't do that, that doesn't mean they're not worthy of you. That means that they need to either attempt, try, learn, find out enough about you to be able to figure out what that is. And either attempt, try, learn, find out enough about you to be able to figure out what that is. And that's not money because, yeah, because you listen, a lot of women, especially black women, and a black introvert for Sanis, but I will, in our society right now, black women

are making a lot more money for the most part than black men, right? There are a lot of black men who are successful, but for the most part, Black women are making a lot more money for the most part than black men, right? There are a lot of black men who are successful, but for the most part, black women are making the money. So you, if you can find love, if that man works, you know, at whatever job, and it's a good man, and it's good to you, and honors, and honors the house, and honors what, and does what he can, because his, his gift for me and I be your gift. Exactly. That is okay. That's not somebody who's beneath you.

That's somebody who came to love you at your work. And as long as he's secure in himself to know that, yep, she makes most of the money. All I can pay is a light bill. As long as she's comfortable enough to say, I'm gonna cover the mortgage and all the other stuff. You've handed light bill, baby, you can take me to dinner and everything down there.

That is fine. Yeah. That's fine. Yeah. But that's so hard for a lot of people to take in because that means, no, no, no, I need somebody to, who was, I need, I need, they need to make five times more and I got to have, I got to have, but you can, but go and keep your list, baby. God bless you. Hope it happens. Don't keep your list. But when you talk about just someone to love you and support you, I know people who have, who, whose men can't touch

what they made. But when you see them together, that love, that support, that I got you, babe, it's a beautiful thing. It is, it is. I remember I was having a conversation with you and I was going, I can admit that I had fallen under that, like, okay, I actually may have misunderstood what meet me at my worst, man. I thought meet me at my work, but meet me at my network.

You've been my network, right, right, right, right, well, not your network. Right. Meet me at least meet me at my network. Okay, yeah, yeah right, right, Mel, not your network. You're right. Me being at least me being my network. I was talking to you all, I was like, and Tyler, I was like, this is this and this and this and I've done this and you're like, well, well, well, well, like, stop.

You was like, don't make it about money. And this is when I was like, oh my gosh, like it was like, it just went off and I was like, I see what you're saying. You were like, Christa, I see the same thing. I was like, be doing all these things for someone or people around me and I'm like, I see what you're saying. You were like, Chris, I see the same thing. I was like, be doing all these things for someone or people around me. And I'm like, they're not doing,

I'm not getting anything returned. You know, and we follow into that sometimes. And you said, but then I thought about it, they can't do for me the way I do for you. No. It's just like, they can't. You got to mean when you explain to like that, if he is giving you all these other things,

then that's something you work with. And I did, I literally completely misconstrued, but maybe at my worth in the day moment, but worth is more than that. Right. You know, and that sounds like, wow, this is way deeper. You got to remove the money from the situation because it's just going to cloud it. And then you have your girlfriend and this friend, Dev's saying, he's doing his thing, he's got that, you don't understand the love that we have for each other. And that is what is important.

And I'm telling you, there are some good men who came to meet you at your net worth. Yeah. And if you can find a man who is secure enough within himself to stand in that space. Yeah. I'll tell you the story. Oprah tells a story about her and Steppen.

And she was, they went Hawaii. And she was walking this years ago. She walked in the store. He was behind her. And I'll tell you this story. This is because I was there for this one. We were coming out of the color purple premiere in New York. And it's Tina Turner, Oprah and me and Gail,

we're all kidding the car. You just said that so, you just said that. Well listen, that's when I first knew something had shifted. Okay, wow. Cause Oprah walks out and they scream, Oprah, Oprah, Oprah, Tina walks out of the, Tina, Tina, I go out and hear Tyler, Tyler, I go, whoa, this is very early on.

So I, they're pushing us into the limo and I've turned back and statement, the security is pushing them out of the way, not letting them in. Wow. I watch him, Captain Man on the shoulder, say, hey, goes, oh, oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Graham, and he let him in the car. But do you know when I saw that man who six foot six

in that situation, I went, wow, look at the grace in how he carried it. He didn't get a car with attitude. He wasn't mad, which takes me back to the story in Hawaii when they were in the store and everybody swarmed around. Oprah, he was watching protectively. And after she was leaving the store, the store owner, older person said to her, listen, I watched that man, how he loves you. I watched that man, how his aura is all around,

you're making sure you're okay and safe. And Seppman does well in life. But I don't know, nobody doing well is open. I love. You know what I mean? So it can't be about the money. It can't be about the money. That was a good nugget that you gave me recently. And I was like, wow, because you do get caught up in the what your girls are saying and what society is saying. Because that's going to, but that's, and if you try to make it about the money, then it's always going

to be about the money. And the money is, you have to understand that when you start to make money and do well, that becomes a part of the perception of who you are. Wow. And that's OK. Yeah. That was the thing that bothered me about it. It was like, all he sees my money, all he sees my money, I'm, I'm a good person. I have to let all of it go. I'm like, you know, well, the money is a part of your person now. So let that be. Wow. And that's okay. Yeah. Now when you started making money, we talk about money as a part of the person listen

That's a whole other podcast the financial literacy. Yes. Yes, but I didn't go ahead. Let's yeah Even like with like family and friends. What did you go through when you start? Because like I'm that's the thing I start to deal with now, you know Just the entitlement are like give me give me give me and the random text messages And like I'm just waiting on the asking for something. Yeah, because we usually what happens is, you know, they don't talk to you forever. And then they're like, hey, how you doing?

You been on my mind. God told me to pray for you on my heart. I'm thinking, okay, 10, 9, 8, can you send me $30,000? Cause I need 30. And then I had another family member sent, and it said, and I was hurt by it. I said, listen, you sent me a text asking for $30,000. That's offensive.

Like call me. See how I'm doing. You want? Yes. And then I don't mind, you know, I don't mind giving you the money. Well, this family member got offended. So I've never asked you for nothing else. I was just saying how impersonal of the text is.

Yeah, absolutely. So. The while later, get another text. Well, I was just saying how in how in personal the text is. Yeah, absolutely. The while later to get another text, I need $30,000 same person. And then the follow of text was make it 40. Tyler, I kid you not. And I was hurt by the fact that make it 40. Yeah, yes, just that it was just so blatantly like,

I'm just the money right yeah and I get to this place called come because it's a thing called compassion fatigue where you just get exhausted from giving like and you and for me I have to go away and pray and get get myself back together because I get to get the on my face kind of place you know what I mean so yeah so I have to go back and get right with that. But having that, having family members, you know, that's crazy. I just wonder how you do on your level because nobody's calling me for 30, well, I'm trying to do a call for 40. Right, right, so let's go back. Let's go back. But you know what, I learned to accept them as who they are, and the family doesn't necessarily have to be the people that are your blood

So I started surrounding myself with people who Genuinely cared about me. Yeah, if we were on a boat on just someone we're now groups on the trips If we're on a boat if we're on the island for you know these people care. Yes, they can't pay for it But but they are there because they want to support you and care for you. And that feels more like family. So my family gets money, but they have to work or they won't get money because I'm not a bank and I'm not the government. Yeah. And I think it's important that people work. Yes. So, working is so important.

I agree. I agree. Was there ever a moment where you have survivors in Morris, where you, the only person in your family that has made it, where you feel like, no, I feel bad that I'm the one that made and everybody else did, and so I got it, I have to do these things. First year, I made money. I went from dead broke, I was 28 years old, I made $130,000 so I got it, I have to do these things. First year I made money. I went from being dead broke, I was 28 years old, I made $130,000, I was like, oh my God, $130,000.

Got to the end of the year, had nothing to pay my taxes because I'd given it all away. Wow. As so much guilt that I've given it to all family, all friends. Next year, I think I've made a million and a half. Same thing happened again. Wow. Next year, I made and a half. Same thing happened again. Wow. Next year, I made seven million.

Same thing happened again. Because I had so much guilt because I had it. And I think this is something that whiz black people carry because of what we've been through. And when you have, you think, oh my God, I need to bring everybody else up with me. That's a beautiful thought. Yeah.

But in the beginning, that's bullshit. Talk about it. That's real. Bullshit. Get that out of your mind because I'm gonna tell you right now, if you have a boat that can help you get to one from this place to that place so that you can get a bigger boat and you can only take two or three people, don't let everybody on that boat. And you got to be also careful because when you put too many people on the boat, there's some trying to put holes in it because they wanted to sink because they don't like that you're sailing. Yeah. So you have to be careful, right? Yeah. Or there's some that are putting holes in the boat because they don't feel that they're worthy of it. And I've had that too where I

was trying to pull people up to, come on, come on this as far as we can do, we've been together all these years, we can make this happen, it's going to be wonderful, it's going to be great. But the whole thing that I had to realize is that some people cannot survive in certain altitudes. So if you're pulling somebody up a hill who, when you get to 10,000 feet, they can't breathe, you're going to kill them. So it's okay to leave them there until they learn the conditioning of what it takes to be at 10,000 feet. Wow, that's good, too.

That's good. I'm going through a season. I just did an episode called on purging season and season nine. And it was just about God. I said that again, I'm sorry. Purging season, season one, yeah. Yeah, season one, I did an episode called purging season.

And his literally, like I was just removing people, like friends, family, he was just like, Lord, what is happening right now? And you're starting to see that, like you said, people can't breathe that the outs are too, that you go on to, or you did a speech about, I think it was a commencement speech on,

you talk about rocket boosters. Yeah. And I was like, when you said that, that's exactly what came to mind when I thought about, Lord, what is this that you're taking me through right now? Yeah. Because I felt like I was losing people I was really close to. Yeah.

But everybody can't go. Yeah. And it's, you ever seen a bunch of kids on America around who goes faster and faster and faster and faster and faster and faster? What you find is that the people who are closest to the center can hold the tightest. The ones who are out toward the,

who are holding on are getting the most of the G forces. It's too, they can't handle it. So those are the people who are falling. So I call it the spin there. Sometimes in your life, you'll start to spin, and you're spinning up to the next level. And people start to fall off.

And let me tell you something, it hurts. It's lonely. Expression when it's somebody that you really, really loved and had a great time with and wished that they could be there with you. But you have to understand and realize that that toxicity is poison to your wings. It will cause you to crash. So you have to be able to say, I love you, but I'm sorry, this does not work for me. Then you get this shit all you booze you you changing. What's the oh no now you got all this and you don't want none of that matters. Yeah. Walk through the pain of the loneliness.

Come and taste them. How do you go the smaller that circle gets? It is. You're so right. Yeah. Yeah, I'm just getting started and I see it. And it's okay, it's okay because I promise you, if you ask God to give you what you need, they show up. Wow, they do, yeah. They show up. And I have what I need.

I do, like, I really have a good core and everybody that's around me, I know they love me, they support me wholeheartedly. We all have our own thing going on. And it's no jealousy. Right, that's what you want. Because jealousy will show up in ways that you didn't even expect it. And people who have been right up under you as long as you didn't exceed what they thought you could be. The minutes you start to go

higher than they believed you could go. It's ugly. Yeah, no, absolutely. Yeah, that's a real thing. And it is lonely. It is. They say it's lonely at the top of it. No, I'm not lying. But here's what I had to learn how to do. I had to learn to get all of my friends.

Nobody can give you all everything you need. So all of my friends were brought something. It's like a, like a, you have a potluck what you can bring everybody brings it something to eat. And some people may be able to bring fruit, some can bring vegetables, some can bring chicken, some can, so I had a, all of my friends bring me something different. So that I have all that I need.

Ooh, I like that. Because you can't get it from one person. Absolutely. That's so good. I love that. Denora had actually spoken on something recently that piggybacks off of what you said. She goes a lot of times when God brings people in your life, you're like, why am I not getting what I'm putting into this? Like I'm pouring, I'm pouring, I'm pouring into this person, but I'm not getting it back. And she said that sometimes that person isn't putting your life to pour back

into you. You're on assignment to them and if if somebody else is gonna bring you what you need. That's, that's, you're 100% right. That's exactly right. And, and you have to understand that when it's your time to pour, do that. Yes. And, and hopefully, that seed that you're watering will start to grow

in that person. Because I've seen this like in you. Like seeing you come up to this place of like, look, I poured into it and now look. And I've got thousands of those examples in the studio. Like I poured in, look at him now. And it warms me so much because when you're pouring,

pour with pure intention. Yes. And then you don't worry about being hurt if it doesn't work out. Yeah. Just be pure and your intention don't let people change your intention. Even if they give you the ass to kiss

after you were trying to help them. Don't stop who you are going and help the next person. Yeah. You know? It's so that is so important. It's just so important. That's really good. Yeah. It's really good. Yeah. Yeah. It's so that is so important. Just so important, that's really good. That's really good.

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it's so good. Yeah, she's been dropping some nuggets. I'm like, oh, God, it's really talking to you. And me, I love it. So I want to go back to some of your journey. You started off in the children's circuit

with media plays. You worked way up to owning your own studio. At the time that she would like doing the smaller plays, what was it from, like even actually I want to go back to when you decided like, but what was that in between phase of like right before things went crazy? Like when you were doing the smaller plays,

what was that like? There was no in between phase. I was 28 years old, those 27 broke homeless, 28. I had 28 years old. I was 27, broke homeless. 28, I had been trying to do the show for seven years. And in 1998, the show took off. So it was famine, famine, famine, struggle, struggle, desert, desert, desert. And then all of a sudden, it was abundance.

It was the abundant rain pouring. So I went from, when I started in 98, this is what I feel like I missed 12 years of my life, though, I was working so hard. 98, I kind of came to myself at 40, like I woke up going, whoa, you did it. You did it, but you missed everything.

Ah, because there's so many of those moments, I don't remember. I was so laser focused on making the success work. And also, I was afraid of going back. That's what we talked about earlier. I didn't want to be broke again. I need to have my medicine for my mother. That's how it all started.

I just need to do it. My prayer was all just letting me make enough money to take care of her. And I had millions and it still wasn't enough in my mind. So I was still going really, really, really hard. Until she died, when she died, it had resetted me. Like everything I was pushing for was gone. Yeah. Yeah, but but those those times were so Such a blur because I just worked all the way through. Yeah, do you have any regrets? I sometimes I do because I look I feel like I'm 12 years younger because I've went into this silo of working and I came out 12 years later of like, okay,

oh wait, this is what the world is. This is what, wait, people, well, they were enjoying themselves at these parties and Oscars and award shows. I wouldn't, you know how I would walk in. Even out. I was like, I'm not enjoying, nope. This is work.

Back to work. Okay, yeah, we're good. Back to work. Literally. So I feel like I missed 12 years of my life, even though now I look back at some wonderful things happen. I'm telling you I missed them all. Like I'll see photos or somebody remind me, you remember when I go, you're right.

Yeah. That's amazing. But instead of being 53, I'm 41. There you go. There you go. There you go. There you go. So, there we go. There you go. There you go. I love it.

What does a billionaire like you who has a busy schedule, what do you do for yourself? Like, you know, a lot of people say, like, this is my me time, this is what I do. What do you do for fun? What do you do to like take care of Tyler's of your body? I know you work out, or do you like the travel, but like, what are things that you do?

Because a lot of people like, you're working all the time. When do you have time for just you? You know what, people think that I'm a lot busier than I am, but because we work so fast, and because I build in breaks, I don't try to kill myself. Like I would have backed in,

but now, no, I build in, but I'm gonna work three months really, really hard, non-stop, I'm gonna exhaust myself, and I'm gonna take two months off. I'm gonna go to my place in Wyoming or Colorado I'm gonna walk through the woods and be a nature. I'm gonna talk to God. I'm gonna go down to the island I'm gonna cry. I'm gonna pray. I'm gonna lick my wounds to see who who who stayed who didn't what work where where my hurt Am I okay? Am I feeling loved? Am I feeling supported? I check in with myself. I talk to God about it. It's so important. It's so important. But the biggest thing that I do, because I can do it every day that I'm working, is just build airplanes, build my airplane.

Yes, I love it. Me and my son will sit there and just he's loving it. We're, you know, it's just the simplest thing. But to build something that we can fly, I feel like I'm teaching my son how to literally fly. Wow. So those moments are really beautiful. That's so beautiful. I love that. And this kid, you know he's amazing.

Yeah, brilliant. Oh my gosh, I can't wait to see where he goes and what he decides to do with his life is gonna be amazing. Yeah, brilliant. Oh my gosh, I can't wait to see where he goes and what he decides to do with his life is gonna be amazing. And you know, whatever it is, I just want him to be the best at it and be happy. I love it. Yeah, just be happy son. Yeah.

But right now it's a race car driver, astronaut, and a track and field runner and a comedian. So we had a business meeting in my office a few weeks ago and I was asking him, you know, he was in the room and I was having all these meetings. And then he comes, okay, pop us my turn to meet. Okay, great, have a seat. What do you want to talk about?

I want to talk about my life and my career and what I'm going to do. He's like, okay, eight years old. You better, man, I love it. So I recorded it and I can't wait to show him when he's older. Like this is what you wanted to talk about that day. That is amazing.

It's amazing. When you are dealing with things mental health is really big. Like a black community is really honing in on it and understanding it more. We're more open to therapy. Who does someone like Tyler Perry talk to? Do you have someone that you can like say,

hey, this is what I'm going through? Jesus. Yeah. Jesus. No, Oprah, this is what I'm going through. Jesus. Yeah. Jesus. Yeah, no, Oprah, T.D. Jakes. I have Michelle Obama. I have really good people who have been through some things.

I used to talk to Sicily Tyson about things, just that level of history and lessons that she's learned and Sydney Portier. I went to the masters. Yes. I was flying to Africa and I invited both of them to fly with me So I literally sat at their feet listening to their stories to you know, Clarence Avon died Yes a couple days ago, and he just was

He was the black offer He was absolutely and anytime you needed anything or something put together, this or presidents or that he was the man. So I had a chance to spend time with him. That's just Quincy Jones, these guys. Harry Belafonte on the phone with him. That's what I mean. Those are the people, but all our legends are getting out of here. There are, yeah.

So I'm hoping that more of us will be open to sharing. When I talk to Jay, Jay, he is one of those people who's like, listen, I got the information committed. But as far as mental health goes, I tell you the main problem that's how. You look at the tobacco crisis when everybody is talking about how cigarettes were in the beginning they were safe, but people made billions of dollars on it. Then you look at all the other opioid crisis, crack cocaine, right. There's another crisis that is happening that is affecting people's mental health in ways that nobody's talking about, and I'm hoping one day that it comes crashing down like the tobacco industry,

like the opioid addiction industry Purdue Pharma. And that is social media. I know you're gonna say that, oh my gosh, you are right. If you don't believe me, try to turn it off and put it down. I think of my phone randomly like, I'll be doing something before I know that I'm just scrolling on Instagram.

It's like a drug. Yes, and you're being fed, whatever algorithm you chose, because it's attached to where you go, where they are tracking everything you're doing. And whatever mood you're in, that's what it's going to enhance. Yeah.

So if your person is already struggling to sad and depressed and dealing with some things, it's going to be really, really tough to come up higher when you're constantly being fed things that make you sad and depressed. I'm not talking about clinical depression. I'm talking about people who are sad and depressed. Yeah. No, I used to, I went through a phase where I had body dysmorphia because I would look on Instagram and I would see all these perfect bodies whether it was

plastic surgery bodies or just everything is perfect. Everybody's just showing their highlight real. Yeah. It's all you're seeing. You never seen the down times and I'll try to be more transparent with that because people just think our life is so perfect. I'm like, no, it's not. And listen, I know a lot of those folks, and I'd be like, this your life for real. Cause that ain't what you really gonna do. I, so it's just like, stop with the madness, stop with the madness of trying to give this perfect

image that everything's perfect. Cause there are people who are really struggling, who are really looking to these images and thinking, this is how my life should be. Now, if it's aspirational, great. But if it's something that, you know, Dan, where you got 38 filters on, 2000 retouches, and 48 something else to make sure it looks great. Come on. I was a girl. I'm a vegan. It's like, let me go ahead and meet that right? To digital Botox, Nittalk. Yeah. I worry about it for my son who's not on it, who doesn't see it, he doesn't. to read. To digital Botox, knit talk. Yeah. All the things.

I worry about it for my son who's not on it, who doesn't see it, he doesn't. He reads books. So, I don't want him to be so unaware of it, but I want him to know who he is before the world starts to try to tell him who he is. That's so good. I love it. I love it. So, when we talk about God and aligning your vision with God,

how do you create the space for God to really like talk to you and say, hey, I know you said sometimes things get shaken up when you try to go against what God is saying, maybe because you see something totally different. Because your vision's not aligned. Yeah. And I've learned to surrender to God's vision. I don't try to align, have him align to my vision.

I let the opposite happen. I'm like, okay, where are we going? Yeah. What are we doing? And I've learned so much God to trust you that this is the way I'm going to go, because I don't want the resistance and the fighting or the other stuff.

It's just a surrender to it. But again, I keep going back to social media because it is so hard to hear from God in noise. And if you are the type of person that is seeking advice from every friend you have online, every Instagram, every TikTok, if you're seeking advice, how can you know the still small voice that I believe is God. That's why I have to remove myself and not be on anything digital and just listen to see what I hear. Walking in nature is the best way.

I was out in Colorado and the wind just whispered pat. I heard it. I thought it was traffic coming because we were up on this mountain. I thought it was traffic and I asked the guys, I mean is that the traffic is, no, that's the wind it's coming. And I heard it come that over the mountain

down through the valley and come up over it. And for me, that's like how I think God will speak, like there'll be over there just this little bit of something that you missed. Wow. And then there's another something, okay, you missed the acorns, so now the branch has to fall. Okay, you missed the branch, now the tree's got to fall on you.

Okay, you still missed that, the whole forest is burning. So I've learned to just, when I see the acorn, I'm gonna be like, oh, no, no, no, no. Let me get that, because I don't want the tree at the forest, so no, just give me the acorn. Mm-hmm, oh, that's good, because the whole forest would be burning around me. Yeah. I'm like, no, I see it this way. Yeah. And I need to get better at surrendering.

I always ask for God to order my steps, but I still am very much like, okay, this is the way I see them. So I'm going to go this way until God is like, girl, get out here. Yeah, God, God in the Bible says, my thoughts of you are pure and of a good report and that you be in health and prosperous, your soul prosperous, right? So all of that's good, right? So if your vision isn't aligned with what's good, then I don't know how that can be God. Right, that's so good.

And what's good for you may not be the thing that you're supposed to do at the time. And that's normally what I be doing. Yeah. I always do things that I don't really be doing. And guys like, girl, we've been through this before. Why are you still doing the same thing? But let me tell you something. I really didn't understand the love of God until I had a child.

Wow. And if God loves us more than I love my child, that I can't even wrap my brain around that because this and he does, because this, when I see him making a mistake, or when I see him going the wrong, doing something wrong, I'm like, okay, how do I correct him? How do I get him on this right now? And I'm gonna choose the level of correction

based on how hard he's going at it. Yeah. Yeah. That's good. I love it. I love it. I love that. So we talk about you having vision as a little boy. So as an adult, what do you, once you have that vision,

how do you decide, okay, God, I'm gonna partner with you to bring this to life. Is it through prayer, through meditation, or just always keeping him involved? It's his vision. Mm-hmm. So you, you riding long. He gave it to you.

Yeah, you ain't, you ain't in partnership. It's his vision for your life. So it's it's it's surrendering to where is this taking me. That's the thing like where is this taking me and how that's what I was saying the most frustrating part of my early life was having all these visions and not seeing the past. Yeah. So I could have did a million plays and never saw anybody ever saw. Never God had to line all of that up for it to start to work. Wow. And I had to be willing to get in the middle of it and go hard.

That's why I missed those 12 years because I was in the will. In the will. We were in it too. Yeah, still. Yeah, still, yeah. But I'm enjoying my life a lot more. Now I'm enjoying the moment. I're in it too. Yeah, yeah, still. Yeah, still, yeah. But I'm enjoying my life a lot more. Now I'm enjoying the moment. I'm taking the moments now.

I was just at an age where, you know, I'm just running hard. I love you in this phase of your life. Yeah, I'm pretty happy. And enjoying it. Yeah, we're in nice clothes going concerts. You know, stuff. We got some blame playing on.

I love reaching. Yeah, I see it. Things I've never bought before. Like, yep, no. But you can't, you know. Yep, had my zoops, zoops, my Steve Hobbit, zoops back in the day I was clean. Ah!

And my rabbit, Jeremy. Where's your? Mm. They told me it was a mink, but it was a rabbit when I bought it a green bride. Ah! Mm. Never bought it a green bride.

I should do it. I wanted that store still there. I need to go buy that store. Just to think. It probably is. It is hilarious. Tyler, thank you so much. I appreciate you. I am beyond proud of you, mother. Thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you.

Looking at you, come through all of this. And I was right there with you to see it. No, all the time. There is things. Yeah, to see it. Look at you. It's crazy. And when you wake up in here, do you like?

When I open those doors and walk in here, I'm like, what? This is my life. Yeah. I'm like, what? I'm like, what? I'm like, what when you wake up in here, you're like, when I open those doors and walk in here, I'm like, this is my life. This is my life.

Yeah. Yeah. It feels so good. Yeah. It feels so proud of you. Thank you. I appreciate you coming today. At the Closed Up Show, we do what is called positive outcomes, where our viewers actually

write into us, and we're going to give them some advice. So our listener letter today says hi crystal thank you for taking the time to help me lately I've been feeling like I'm stuck it's like I'm being pushed to bigger and greater things but I feel like I'm getting in my own way my fear and insecurity keeps holding me back and I feel myself battle with the fear of others saying, who does she think she is, by fully stepping into whatever it greater is? The best way I can describe it is that feeling when I'm on a boat

and God has called me to the water, but my fear of drowning is greater than my faith that God will help me float. So I'm just standing at the edge of the boat, not jumping. How can I get myself to jump? Go back and read again. Read again. Okay, all right.

Hi, Crystal. Thank you for taking the time to help me. Lately, I've been feeling like I am stuck. It's like I'm being... She's problem number one. I have been feeling like I am stuck. She's speaking that I have been feeling like I am stuck. So you speak things into existence,

it's probably life and death's in the tongue. I have been feeling like I am stuck. Rather than I am not stuck, God it's gonna make a way I am not stuck. Go on, what's there's something else she says. She says, it's like I'm being pushed to bigger and greater things, but I feel like I'm getting in my own way.

It's like I'm being pushed, no. I am being pushed to bigger and greater things, but I feel like I'm getting in my own way. It's like I'm being pushed. No, I am being pushed to bigger and greater things. But I am getting in my way and understanding your own words. When you give me answers to yourself, I am getting in my own way. Well, why? What is your motivation? Why are you getting in your own way? What did Mama say?

What did Daddy say? What did daddy say? What they say at school? What did what did the little girl and you deal with that makes you get into the way of the successful woman that's trying to figure it all out? So you've got to go back and undo some of those voices. And every time you hear something negative, when I was coming through all this stuff, every time I hear something negative, like, no, I'm not letting it in because I believe I can do this. God said, I can do this. This is going to be okay. It's all going to work out. Every time. Don't let negative voices in your head become your reality

because they will. Mm-hmm. They will. That is so true. She is. And then she said, my fear and insecurity, he was holding me back. I feel myself battle with the fear of other people saying,

who does she think she is, fully stepping into that? My fear is holding me back. Here's something you have to understand about fear. Fear and excitement can mimic the same emotions in you. Wow. So you can be excited, but you think you're afraid. Yes. So you have to be clear about what you're identifying.

Right? Good. Yeah, yeah. That's good. Wow, you helping me. My goodness, and it says, the best way I can describe it is that I feel like I'm on a boat, and God has called me to the water,

but my fear here goes fear again. Of drowning is greater than my faith that God will help me float. Yeah, where did it come from? Let me take some fears, good. A healthy dose of fear is greater than my faith that God will help me float. Yeah, where did it come from? Let me take some fears good. A healthy dose of fear is good to have, because it keeps you grounded, it keeps you humble, and it keeps you praying.

I never would have gotten to this place if I hadn't been afraid. Yes. Every major decision was like, what if this doesn't work? I hope I can open that out of your head, because you cannot be afraid. And as I, the more,

and I say this to her, the more success she has, even if she looks back in her over her life, nine times I'd say when I ask people this, it blows their mind. I look back at your entire life and tell me how many times God has let you down. Our entire life. Yeah.

And if you really think about that, your'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm going to say, I'm I learned so much and the things that God didn't let me do. And when a door is closed, that is not a no. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That is, there's another way. That's another path. It's like being in a maze.

When you hit that brick wall, you don't stop. You could, okay, maybe I got to double back. I got to go this way. I got to go this way. But you'll get there. Yes. Wow, that's so good. And her last question is, how do I get myself last question is how do I get myself to jump?

How do I get myself to jump? Yeah, by undoing all of those voices that cause you to have those for you. Yes, that's good. Wow, well, you all heard it from the man himself. Like, I ain't got nothing else to add to that. That was good. He broke that all the way down.

Wow, thank God bless me, my goodness. I only want to look at this work, I know she probably cried and I'm scared to wake her up. So the next thing we do is what I'm going for. I like that outfit. Who fucked you that outfit? You need it. Go ahead, what you saying? Darling, this came from the Dogehanger-Binistore in Puerto Fino.

Was it Puerto Fino? It was Puerto Fino. It was Puerto Fino? It was Puerto Fino. It was somewhere where Darling was so long ago to remember. I had a rough night at sea and I was, I couldn't get out to shop in my different Tyler Perry's. That was a rough night. I got you. Yeah, well, that is sinister.

It makes you feel better. I did it. Immediately. I was like, oh, I think I can get up now. I did. And the black card and make a girl get out the bed. She like baby. Real with everything.

That's so good. That's so good. That's so good. So we also do what is called what I'm going through and what I'm growing through. And in this season of my life, even based on things we talked about, I am going through, especially right now we're on a strike, just stretching my faith, learning new things that I want to do, and not putting all my eggs in one basket, and just having faith that God is going to move. Is that going through or growing through?

This is what I'm going through, here right now, but then I'm growing, yeah, then I'm growing through. This is what I'm going through here right now, but then I'm growing, yeah, then I'm growing through. Right now I'm really growing through, and I feel like this is always growing through, not like having control of everything, and allowing things to just be, so that'd be what I'm just letting go. What value are you going through? What I go through is just battling compassion for D.G. as we talked about before. And understanding that everybody's not going to get it. And being okay with that, I still have to remind myself of that.

That's what I'm growing through, or I would say. Yeah. Going through, I'm actually pretty good. You are baby. You're good. I'm really, really good right now. I've lived these 53 years and learned a lot of things. And all I want to do at this point is just take this wisdom,

these things that I've learned and share them with anybody who wants to receive them, take them. But I also don't want to, oh my God, the older you get, I see some old people who just, they are just impatient. The older you get is like, listen, I have one friend I've been trying to help for years. I was like, we've been over this. I've told you these things 10 different times

because I never say you should do this. When I'm giving advice, most times I let people talk so they can hear themselves work out the issues. But other times, I'll say, well, if I were in your shoes, if I were, here is my thinking on that. But after sharing and sharing and sharing and sharing, and you still don't start making progress in that direction, like you're wasting my time because there's somebody else who could be using this. And who listen and figure it out. Yeah, take those nuggets you're giving in a quiet. That's so true.

And anybody who can get to me, what I mean by that is like anybody who can get in my presence. Like I'm, I say this in the best way. No, I know exactly what you mean. Yeah, I'm, I'm, I'm Tyler Perry, you know, and I'm, I'm a loner by nature. I like to be alone. And so when people make their way into my life, I go, oh, you are clearly somebody God has sent for me

to pay attention to, because you broke through all of that stuff and you're this close, I'm like, okay, what am I supposed to teach you, God? I can't be selfish, can't be about you. I know about how tired, exhausted, here's a moment. And because that moment may be something that saves or changes that person's alive. Yeah. I'm a witness.

I'm a testimony. A live and proof example. Okay. And the last thing we do is keep it blank, sweetie, because the show is called keep it positive, sweetie, but we feel in the blank. And I would say keep it open-minded, sweetie, because opening your mind to new things can like get you further.

I think we were saying same thing, but guys say keep it growing. There we go. Keep it growing, just keep it growing. Yes, here we go again. Here we grow again. Here we go again. I love it, thank you so much.

Guys, thank you so much for tuning into this episode. If you want to be featured on our positive outcomes, listen to letter, please write into keep it positive, sweetie at gmail.com. You can follow me on all platforms at LUV, Crystal Renee, and then you can also follow Kip's on all platforms at Keep It Poses, sweetie. And you guys can follow Tyler at Tyler Perry

because he's Tyler Perry. So anytime somebody is being some negative and you don't want them to know what you're saying or they're being all that way, you just say Kips. Kips, Kips, Kips, Kips, Kips. Kips, T-shirts. Oh, it's coming, March. March.

March, March, Kips. The March is coming. Yes, thank you, T. My pleasure. I love you, man. I love you too.