Keep it Positive, Sweetie - Wisdom Gained from Relationships, Love and Lust w/ Josh Powell

Episode Date: February 13, 2024

In this weeks episode, I have former NBA player now author, Josh Powell on the couch. I learned about Josh through mutual friends who shared with me how moved they were by his vulnerability and the open conversations he has been having about healing his relationship with love, lust and sex. So many of us can relate to his journey! Tune in and be sure to get his book, What I Wish I Knew: The Wisdom Gained From Relationships, Love, and Lust

Hi guys and welcome to this episode of Keep It Positive Sweetie. Today we are talking about what I wish I knew with Josh Powell. Josh, thank you so much for coming today. I've known you through mutual friends for years but we've never spoken. It's always been kind of in passing. But recently a friend of mine and her boyfriend went to your book signing event. And she called me and she goes,

could we go to church together? And she goes, yeah, she's like, my boyfriend asked me to come to this book signing. And she's like, I didn't think it was going to be anything special. And she said, girl, it was the most amazing, different book signing that I've ever been to in my life. And she talked about how you spoke about relationships

and did an open apology to women that you may have mistreated or that you felt were owed an apology in your past. And she's like, it was the most beautiful thing ever. And a day later, I get an email from your team to come on your podcast, Relationships Matter. And when I realized it was you, I said, hey, is this the same guy?

She goes, yeah, I said, we need to get him on, keep him positive, sweetie. So it all worked out. I'm excited to do your podcast as well. Absolutely. Cannot wait, but thank you so much for coming. Thank you. Yes.

And it's funny because it's kind of like one of those things, like what's an athlete gonna talk about in regards to relationships? And that's the thing that I love about this platform, is just being able to show that different side. Because when you see me, you know, you see an athlete, you see a guy with just all these tattoos and da da da da da, and it's like, man,

what he gonna be talking about? Right. And being in this place and space that I'm in right now, just service, that's it. Like I really want to make an impact each and every day and continue to grow and get better. So, I feel like I'm trying my best to right my wrongs, even though that's impossible for any of us to do,

but I do try to make the effort. So I really do appreciate you know, saying that with you. Some people don't even try to make amends. So the fact that you have the awareness, and I know that's come with the work that you've done, we'll get into the work that you've done. We're going to get into all that. But for the audience and members who do not know, Josh, you are a former NBA player, your elite champ, big three co-captain

of the Killer Threes in 2023. Shout out to my set. Yes. And then most recently, you're a podcast host of Relationships Matter. And now, you're the author of What I Wish I Knew, The Wisdom Game for Relationships, Love and Lust. Absolutely.

When I think, I'll always either open up with a quote or with a song. And when I think about what we're talking about today, is the saying that we've always heard is, if I knew then, would I know now? I would have done things differently. And that's what I think about based on the topics that we're gonna touch on today.

Absolutely. Yeah. Speaking of athletes, I've dated an athlete or two in my life and it has not been the best experience to a point where I'm like, you know what, I don't wanna do this anymore. I'm good. And I think a lot of times we don't understand just like you, with those young men

and little boys went through that made them who they are today. I'm glad you brought that up because I definitely, and I think this might be the first time that I've actually gotten a chance to speak to that. Because it's not necessarily like an athlete thing, but when you look at young men who are groomed, you know, or bred to be in baseball, football, basketball or whatever, you know, the exposure to things, you know, some of the experiences that we face. And then don't you be one of those ones

that have the opportunity to make it? Because now it's not just your peers, that's not the damaging part, it's the adults. It's the family, it's the friends, it's the coaches, it's all of these people that have access to you that kind of sort of allow the behavior, you know, that women who are on the other side of it experience when you meet this guy

that you like I'm attracted to and he plays this sport or he does this thing. And then it's like, I tried it with athlete and I'm not going there. It's like, no, he's a human being first. You have to look at him. Yes. But he has experienced so many different things

that have shaped and molded his way of thinking. So to try to break that, you talking about somebody that's probably been doing something for 10 plus years. You know? Even if you start young, right? So if you date them or meet them at 30, then if they started at 10,

that's 20 years of being shaped and molded. So I just think grace. Absolutely. One of my favorite words is so important. And the issue that we have is just amongst men and women. You know what I mean? Because understanding that so much happens before we meet the person.

And we have to be willing to peel those layers off first in order to get into a healthier space in place presently or how we move forward. Absolutely, that's so good. I opened up your book. I tried to order it but it wasn't going to be here in time so I took this from my good friend and as you can see I've got every like literally every page I was like ooh another gym another nugget like it was so much in this book. And like, I'm seriously guys, you definitely need to get it.

But one thing like that immediately drew me in was your upbringing. Like from that intro, that got me, I was in a chokehold. That's how you got to start it. That was good because people, we've all lived that. I think that's the one thing that we all have in common. No matter how we try to suppress it or push it back, we've all had that darkness.

And I think as a community for blacks, we definitely have been taught and basically race, don't talk about it, move on, it never happened. And we've literally been molded to just push things aside. And that's the thing that I feel is so hurtful because, and it's not a black thing, but I know we definitely experience it in our community, but it's the secrecy.

It's the fact that trauma is happening, abuse is happening, you know, things that are hurtful to young men, young women, and we don't talk about it. We always just sweeping under the rug, things that are hurtful to young men, young women, and we don't talk about it. We always just sweeping under the rug, oh, that's your business, it ain't mine, and that's so scary. And then me as a father now, when I think of

who would my kid run into, and we have a responsibility if we're talking community, in order for us to have the proper conversations and to be able to communicate these different things because I want my kids especially to be able to stand on business and to communicate if they feel that they're uncomfortable or there's something that's going on or whatever, but also too, any chance that I get to speak at a school,

any chance that I get to speak at a school, any chance that I get to talk to a young athlete, I share with them like your responsibility. Because if you bump into my daughter, you gotta do right, bro. Period. Respectfully, like be the example. You know what I mean?

That doesn't mean everything's gonna be peachy king or heartbreak won't happen, but it's a way you go about it. It's the fact that some of the hurt and pain that we're causing doesn't necessarily have to happen. That's so true, and it's so true. So I like the way you wrote this because you started us from the beginning, and I wanna kinda take the audience through that

without telling too much, because I want you guys to read this. But you started, because I think what you did was brilliant because you helped us to understand Josh, the man, who you were as you evolved versus just like, this is what happened and then, or this is how I turned out. Now we know the reason behind it

and it's much deeper than that. You said that your mother and father separated and you ended up moving with her and then she couldn't really take care of you so you ended up moving with her and then she couldn't really take care of you so you move with your aunt and then from your aunt your grandparents came but you never felt you were being shuffled it was just kind of like okay this is just what it is. It's going with the flow.

And it seems kind of like that's your energy still to this day just go with the flow. I kind of feel that. Yeah. And I saw that and then your grandparents raised you in the church. So you had an early foundation, which is very important. And I feel like when people are rooted in that, they always eventually come back to that, which we end up finding out that you did. But what I found so interesting was the dysfunction once your parents decided to move on to their respective spouses and you being implanted in those situations and how it just completely turned your world upside down to the point where you ended up pulling a gun, actually pulling a trigger

on your brother, step brother, to being sexually abused by a step cousin who was a lot older, we're not blood related and I've heard so many stories like that. So to address that, to kind of spare people from some of the people that did it, that's why I specifically just said a relative, not who. Okay.

Or whom. Whom, mm-hmm. Because it was more than one. Stop it. Yeah, it was more than one. And I just tried to be very strategic in how do I communicate these things that are going on. It's hard when you were the one that was hurt

but you still try to protect the people that did it. Because the thing that I have to answer to now, like for example, my mother knew nothing about this. Me and my mom had a conversation about it, maybe like three years ago, four years ago. Oh my goodness. And just kind of speaking to a lot of my experiences. And it's just really important to get into that place and space where you can.

So when I was writing this, right, depending on who picks this up, even my kids, I have a responsibility and that's the thing. I try to be very strategic on the intro and not go too deep because there's so much that I left out. So if you felt that way just about that, it's a lot that's left out. And I'm not mad at those people. I don't have anything in my heart

and that's why I was trying to share with people the overall. So I wanted to go dark because I feel like that's one of the things that allows us to make excuses for the behavior men and women, right? Yeah. Is they don't confront the trauma. So it's just tucked and this is just me this is the way that I am and that's not true. So I felt like if I can show you and be, put myself in your shoes, then I could be that example of,

well, if he can do that, then I should be able to do that. Absolutely, that's so good. It's crazy to say that I had a guest on recently, a good friend of mine who was sexually abused by family members as well. And to see where she is now and to have the heart posture of forgiveness a good friend of mine who was sexually abused by family members as well. And to see where she is now and to have the heart posture of forgiveness and how you say

the same thing like I don't have any ill will towards these people. You know you've forgiven them and moved past it. It takes a lot for a person to know that as a child in such an innocent phase of your life that you were taken advantage of. So let me say this. And I'm glad you brought that up, because I didn't address this at the book signing. Because it was the way the conversation was flowed

but I want to address it. In some situations, there might be an understanding that it's wrong. In my situation, I thought this was what everybody was doing. Right. Yeah, just as you said, yeah. So I just felt like this was just the normal thing. And we don't talk about it, we just keep it moving.

And then when you get way older or something comes up, and then, you know, like even today, the conversations that I'm having, it's like some of the guys that are opening up to me about the things that have happened to them, whether it's been because I've been open, because of the book or whatever, and it's just like, yo, it's not normal. It's not.

You know what I'm saying? Like the first time I understood that I was sexually abused was three years ago in a therapy session. When I was getting ready to go through, you know what I'm saying, my divorce at the time, like I say, you know what, when I get back out here, I gotta start over, I gotta peel back these layers, I gotta figure out me. Like I understand or I feel I do,

but let me figure out what's really going on in my spirit. And I was telling her, I'll never forget, I was telling her like, a lot of the things that had happened because in that session I was naming names, I was naming like, I still remember. Because you had to be open and very vivid. Like I still remember to this day,

I don't miss details, nothing. I know who, I know when, I know what, I know all the things that happen as the start. Yeah, mm-hmm. And she let me get it out and then she just looked at me and she said Do you realize you were sexually abused and I paused and it was like the emotion that came But nothing came out because I was super confused and I looked at her and I didn't say nothing for probably like ten minutes Because I didn't I didn't say nothing for probably like 10 minutes. Cause I didn't understand that like,

not that it was something hard to comprehend, but I just, for me, it was so normalized. Like the things that had happened started from the age of nine, 10, that just kept going. And it was just crazy. Like even now, just thinking about that therapy session, it was just, that was heavy.

That was a real heavy day, real heavy day. I can't even imagine. I can't. I've talked to friends who, staying, had therapy and realized that they had been sexually abused. And a lot of times at a young age, same situations where it was like step cousins, they were not blood related, or this is just what you do.

And she said, my friends have said that we didn't realize this is what was happening. It's like, your body's growing, you're like, oh, this feels good, or I like, I kind of like that. I don't know what's like that. And I don't know, I'm not supposed to be liking it with you, you know, and you go through these things and then you realize at an older age that was not normal and it wasn't right. And it just breaks my heart because people who know better, you know, should not do that.

You know, should not prey on younger people. You talked about how when you got into basketball, that's when you really, it's like your first crush, you know, falling in love with the game of basketball. It was the OG. And again, when we talk about community and we talk about certain things, these are like, this is the way it was, I'm sure, taught to him, and then it's just passed now. And I remember like, we would go play games in the weekend.

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And we would hit, we would go practice, we would hit them clubs, we would do everything. And this one you were like a junior in high school. How were you this one? So I was like 15, 16. I couldn't even get out the house at 16. My parents had me. Couldn't even go to sleep. I was like nothing.

It was a very strict home. Yeah, I left the names of the locations. But I for sure, we would, I mean grown women, that's like our age now. Like I was having sex with, and you know, receiving different pleasures from. So I was experiencing so much, and by the time I give back to school on Monday, I'm going to sleep in class, they looking at me like,

what you been doing? Right. And I'm like, bro, you wouldn't even believe it if I told you. Right. You know what I mean? But to me, again, if this is what we supposed to do, I don't know nothing different.

Right, yeah. I was 26 in my class. Yes, 3.7 GPA, yeah. Super smart. And I was still called lazy. I did handle business on the court, you know what I mean? So it's like nobody, people don't realize how we're functioning. How we normalize dysfunction.

And that was me now looking back at it. And then I had this situation with the fallout with my stepdad at the time. And a lot of people didn't know that I was homeless for a year or so. Yeah, because I was just bouncing around trying to find a place to go. It was a lot. It was a lot. And I was still hooping. I was still like, I was just show up like nothing because again, this is how I've been grown.

Like, you don't make no excuses. You can't be emotional. You can't, like you just, this is life and this is what we do. So it's just being able to go through it. And the blessing in that is I still kind of operate like that today, but I try to address the different areas of my life to overcome it to be better.

Yeah, I love that. At what point in your various relationships did you realize I have a problem? Like that you had been over-sexualized at a young age and that you were, everything was just a physical transaction at one point. At what point were you like, okay, Josh? You know, what's scary is I still don't think I have a problem. Wow. I asked my therapist, I said, I understand you explain what happened to me, right, and

it's traumatic. Mm-hmm. Am I this way because of the trauma? Mm-hmm. Am I this way because I really like it now or is it both? I think it could be both honestly and there's no judgment in that you know. No absolutely but for me I feel like okay I acknowledge I understand I get it but I've moved past that and then I really do feel this way about

relationship. Right. So that's always my thing too because on the flip side let's remove the trauma. Now let's go to the experiences so let's look at this box and if I'm seeing everybody that's in my circle or their people or whomever nobody's being faithful. Nobody's moving according to what the monogamous standard is, male and female. I guess this is life and how it's supposed to be. So then there's that transition. And then here we are today. Where are we today?

Where we are today is I still believe the way that I believe but I subscribe to the best of my ability to the monogamous channel. Is it hard for you? Absolutely. Yeah, because your desires are like super strong. Absolutely. The fact that you can even own up to that is powerful in itself because some people don't even have the awareness to be like, this is who I am.

But finding the person, you know, because even with my old lady now, like I've caused pain and hurt. And she may never look at me the same way she did when I first met her. Yeah. So that's a burden that I got to carry. How do you like every day, what do you do to try to make that writer kind of mend those

wounds with her? I don't ever try to really, my belief system is the more I continue to grow and work on me, then it'll manifest in the areas of my life. That's true because you'll see the change. At least I hope. Yeah. Because the other parts of that is not saying her but maybe in other situations, somebody can carry, they can carry that pain and treat you as such. And then that's why grudges are formed. Yes, yes.

So it doesn't matter. I just heard a story the other day about a gentleman that loves his wife and feels like that's his person and he made one decision. He stepped out of their relationship. That know, that decision, mistake, whatever, whoever, because you know, well if you woulda, you know, so we get into that. But the point is he made the decision that he made and it is now probably cost him because she can't, she can't get over it.

So understanding that level of pain that you cause to people. You know, I get it. But at the same time, you know, I know where I come from and I know my background and it's not my intention. So I know, you know, you talked about earlier like the me asking for forgiveness, you know, at the, at the event. Yeah. And it was to do like two things. It was one, acknowledging like, even to most people, it's like, man, you're, you're healed and you're this and you're that. And I'm like, you might think that, but I'm still not everybody's cup of tea. So let me say that first.

But then also too, let me take the time for those people that I have hurt. It wasn't intentional, but I just need to own whatever I did to you. Even I'm saying my apologies at the level of, even if I feel I didn't do something, but you're hurt and you feel upset about something, I respect that. I don't have to agree, which is different. It is different, yeah.

But I respect that. So that's a part of my ownership. So it's a lot of things that's going on that I have to face daily and it's not easy. You know what I'm saying? Like it's not easy for me to feel the way that I feel or try to suppress or do whatever it is that I'm doing but I do understand the bigger picture, for example.

And I try to just stick to that. So that's my struggle. It's a serious struggle. Yeah, I can imagine. Is there anything that, what do you do for Josh daily to make sure that you continue to evolve in your healing process? What do you do?

Is there anything you do to try to suppress those urges or feelings? Or I know you said now you meditate, you do to try to suppress those urges or feelings or I know you said now you meditate you do yoga You take time for yourself or do you feel like hey this who I am and this is what it is It's both But I do try to Pray and And read more I try to So and read more.

I try to, so going back a little bit, right, the way that I was raised, I'm still Christian, but I found a new faith. And in my belief system, right, we believe at the church of God, for example, we believe in Heavenly Father, Heavenly Mother. I saw you wrote that. And we do all new testament teachings, but everything that we do is according to what

the book is. So like going to church on Saturday, which is the Sabbath. Third day for us is Tuesday. We practice the Passover. We do the Passover. We do the Feast. It's just a different way of moving. In this church, God bless brother David's hands

because that's who preached to me. But in this church, that was like my first time seeing... And we're back on Dealing Together where we help good people who fell for bad deals. First caller? I had to buy three identical sweaters to get the fourth free. Oh, you got fleeced. Next caller, what's your deal? I paid for 20 tanning sessions but had to use them in a month. Now I'm orange.

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Terms of restrictions apply. See ATT.com slash Samsung for details. Monogamous men. That was my first time seeing women who are completely monogamous. This is your first time actually seeing examples of it? Absolutely. Before I knew it exists but I just didn't see it. What do you think you saw with your grandparents? So I got a version of it. And I love my grandparents, but then come to find out my grandfather had three other kids. Oh wow.

So I just met some uncles and aunts. Are you serious? Like four years ago. I feel like every family has it. We're like, yeah, this is your, what? These are the secrets and things. So that's what I'm saying. So it's like, at has it. Like, yeah, this is your, what? These are the secrets and things. So that's what I'm saying. So it's like, at one point in time, my vision of them was,

this is the model. And I still feel that they're the model. It doesn't take away from whatever he did or whatever the case may be. I'm not here to judge or none of that. But it's just, how do I view that? How do I take that? So I was saying all that to say like these are the reasons why I'm trying to like do better now. So like beforehand when I would be outside now it's like if I do happen to go outside it has to

be with a purpose. You know what I'm saying? Or if I am feeling the urge or feeling whatever, I'll call a brother now. Can we get a study in? Yeah. Can you share a scripture with me? Can you pray for me? Yeah. Or I might write a letter to God myself.

And these are some of the things that helped me to stay the course more so. It's still hard because women are beautiful and attractive. I see I want. That's always been me. But just trying to cage that and keep knowing what I'm doing is what I give my effort to. So I guess you would say like going to this church

is helping you stay on the right path. If the people that you're calling now are like, hey, you guys hold each other accountable. It's that and it's just being around good brothers. And I think that's important too. Cause I do got other brothers that aren't a part of the church that are just solid. And we hold each other accountable, you know what I'm saying? I think that's important too because I do got other brothers that aren't a part of the terse that are just solid. Yeah. And we hold each other accountable you know what I'm saying?

I think that's super important. We need community. Absolutely. I don't think we understand how important community is whether it's you know relationship, whether it's friendships, whether it's you got kids, whether you're single no matter what like to have good people in your life, people that hold you accountable, people that want to continue to uplift you, make sure you're okay, that check on you. You know, it's just really important. So I can't stress that enough. We have to get away from feeling like that's your business, that's your life. If you love somebody who care about them, they should be just as much a part of yours as you should be of theirs.

Yeah, so true. I love that. If you were to speak to young men today who are maybe struggling with monogamy or struggling with their own past traumas, what advice would you give them? Well, first, forgive yourself. Like, it's okay.

That's a great question question by the way. But I think that one of the most powerful things you can do is accountability. So when I wrote this book, I took the eight mile approach. I literally thought about the scene with Eminem and Papadot and him figuring out as he's moving round to round to round and then getting to the final like how am I gonna approach this situation and for him it was I know what I can address that

removes power from anything that you're gonna say. Mm, wow. And I feel like in this day and age, you make a mistake, just own it. Mm-hmm. If you make a decision, own it. Yeah. Right, wrong, and different, because that's your power, it sure is to have.

Yeah. I'll be the first to say, I don't do everything right. Mm-hmm. I don't, Queen, and I'm forever trying to grow past that. But I'm a man and I'ma own it and I'ma stand on it. And I hope that that's something that encourages men, young men, women, young women, to just hold yourself accountable.

When we get into trouble, it's like the embarrassment, we don't want people to think some way about us. Or you're judging me, yes and no. Because it's a judging world, we live in a very judging world. I'm so pat, right there, I told y'all I was coming to it. I give zero F's. And I'm saying that respectfully. I am not worried about what nobody says about me.

How you think about me, no, none of that. Cause the reason being, right, is I done been drawn through the mud by the closest people to me. So why would I worry about what the judge would say? Why would I worry about what the teachers or the coaches or the family or other friend like it doesn't, it doesn't, because some of the things that I've seen and witnessed, like my experiences is crazy.

Wow. Do you feel like you would ever open up fully about everything you've been through? Or you thought this is maybe just breaking the tip of the iceberg and then you may eventually like share everything? Because I'm not gonna lie. When I watched this, I mean when I watched it, see, because when I read this, I felt like I was watching something.

So when the camera's cut, I got you. Okay. I literally was like, this could be a movie. Like, because I could tell there was more. I was like, there's so much more to this than we're getting told right now. You know what I wanted to do is create the conversation. Yes I mean well you started it. Because I study, I study what other people do. I really am a student

like I want to, I'm watching how people are going about their life stories, I'm watching how people are talking about their relationships and doing this and doing that and so many people are either secretive or private and I get it. I get it. I'm not here to say that I don't understand. But when we talk about healing and when we talk like if we have a platform, you know, my platform, you know what I'm saying, you know, the 24,000 people that follow me for whatever reason, you know, that see me on other platforms.

I always have a responsibility, no matter where I'm at or what I'm doing. So I try to just be the example of that. That's amazing. You know, and for me, what other way are we going to heal if you don't speak to it? I know pain when I see it. I walk by it every day.

I see broken people, hurt people, people that are suffering from trauma and all that. I see it. I feel it. Even when you smile, I'm like, Big Doll, come talk to me, man. What you got going on? I am you.

Queen, what you, that ain't you. Come here, let me talk to you. Wow. So you're in there? Let's be, because it ain't no way. I remember in my dating stages after my divorce, I was having a conversation with this young lady, beautiful young lady.

And we were talking about and breaking down so many different things. So I expressed, because I was like, I didn't do it my first go around. I'm gonna be honest, I'm gonna do it this go around. I was like, listen, I I'm into polygamy like that's my thing one is not enough I need multiple so what did you say it said well what if I did it oh and I said that's if that's on your spirit let's

talk about it but don't say you're gonna do something to see or get a reaction out of me if you're not about that life. She just wanted to know like, how would you feel if I did it? We different. But if you wanna have this conversation, then let's have it. It's worth a conversation.

I'm not gonna sit up here and shut down anything or however we move it. But let's have a conversation. That's me. I was a fool for it before. Like suppressing and not talking. And maybe a part of that was, I didn't quite understand it. So out of fairness, I'll throw that in there too.

But I feel that we all should have real transparent conversations about who we are, what we want, what our expectations are, the things that we would like to see, what our visions are, all of these different things because that'll help you where you're trying to go in regards to your personal relationships, business, friendships, whatever ships you got going on in your life, that'll help you establish better foundations across the board. I love that.

Now have you let go completely of the idea of polygamy? Now you're really geared towards monogamy. You just look to be like, girl. Like, is that still a thought? Or are you like, I'm cool with one person now? So, as heartfelt as I can say this, because of my belief system,

I have to change my thought process, I have to change my behaviors and I have to really grow and conform to things the way that God was. So good. But in the New Testament, if you live out the New Testament, the New Testament they had different wives. This episode of Keep It Positive, sweetie, is brought to you by McDonald's Best Burgers Ever. McDonald's classic burgers are hotter, juicier, and tastier than ever before. So much so that hamburger is on the loose. The patties are cooked to

juicy perfection. The cheese is perfectly melted. The Big Mac has more special sauce in every bite. They're topped with a pillowy soft golden bun. Mmm my favorite. These are truly McDonald's best classic burgers ever. Or in the words of hamburger, robber robber. Grab your McDonald's best burgers ever before a hamburger does. At a McDonald's near you. I know we hear the stories but but but too, at the end of the day, there's a reason why the system was designed the way that it was. And to be honest, the stories that are in the Bible

go to show and lead us for the things that we deal with today. So it's already happened. Yeah, everything's just. That's why the Bible, everything just repeats itself. So for those that think a certain way It's like we can go to this book show this version of the person that did what they did and make it They can say at the end of the day when it's time to go back to heaven None of this yeah, right because when you get to that point

You got your brothers and you got your sisters. You know what I'm saying? We ain't supposed to be on none of that. We all want big family. So for me, that's really my main focus, is to try to live according to that. And hopefully that helps me to continue to grow and to change a lot of my behaviors. That's good. You know what I mean? But on the flip side, I still, I'll tell you now, I would scream it to whomever, any other time, if it wasn't for my spirit and it wasn't

for my belief system, I still feel the way that I feel. Yeah. Wow. That is really my, that is really deeply embedded in me. Yeah. So I know you said before this is what you want. You want to polygamy. Do you feel like that was a choice that you were making

because it would make sense of why you felt the way you felt in needing more than one woman? Almost like this is a justification as to why I feel so I'm gonna choose this life. I don't want to say it's justifiable because you know we still have our experiences. It's But I do think that being who we authentically are is super power. And so many of us are subscribing to channels that we don't necessarily agree with. And we're being a representative. So I speak about that too. You know how many people can

honestly say that you feel safe in your relationship? How many men, how many women can say that you feel safe, that you can speak your mind freely, that you can express something that is a displeasure, you know, that you can come forth about information that has been weighing heavily on you, that you can come forth about information that has been weighing heavily on you that you need to be set free from And not many people can say that they're doing that. Yeah No, that's so true. I don't know for a young man. Are you comfortable enough telling? You know your significant other that you were molested as a child for a young woman Do you feel comfortable telling your man that you were raped at 19?

You know, do you feel comfortable telling your man that you got daddy issues and vice versa? Like it's a long list of things that we could throw in there. But instead of doing that, we have people that want to portray perfection and it's dangerous. And now we live in this day and age of the internet and everything else. So we're gonna do that times 10. We're gonna let people know I'm happy, I'm good, or that relationship is way beyond me, I'm good. Like I ain't trippin' on him, I ain't trippin' on her.

I didn't get hurt. I break up, they don't break up with me. Whatever it is that we want to touch on. Yes. Our pastor literally just talked about that yesterday. And we don't even want to give people the power or the recognition of hurting us. It's like, I'm good. Like, I broke up with you.

You didn't break up with me. Or I'm cool. That's so silly. Yeah. Like, he literally just talked about it. That's so silly. And the other part that's crazy is majority of people think that way. So that's the sad part, right? If you're a beautiful woman, how dare he breakup with you? Girl, what's wrong? Do you see who you are? Right. Or, Brooke, you got this bag of money, like how dare she treat you like? Like,

bro, that's not it. Y'all ain't addressing this. Exactly, it's deeper than that. Y'all ain't addressing this, so, even when you look at you, you get uncomfortable. Because you know you live in a lie. Yeah, that's so true. I sleep peacefully at night because I know that,

yeah, I effed up, I said some things, I probably shouldn't have said, I did some things, I probably shouldn't have did. I did some things I probably shouldn't have did, but I own that. Take full responsibility. I've apologized, even if it ain't been the sexiest thing for me to do. If my kids look at me sometimes,

they'll be like, bro, I can't stand you, but at least you know the truth. I'd rather you know that than be having this relationship formed off of a lie or formed off of a half-truth or whatever. I'd rather you know who your father is. I'd rather you know who your friend is. I'd rather you know who your son is or your cousin or whatever whatever I am to you. Because I know the dangers of these fake people that come into your life and they come to seek and destroy, you know what I mean?

And I've been dealing with that from childhood up until today. Yeah, speaking of your children, what do you do as a father to protect them? And do you feel like a lot of things that may have happened to you are a reason why you're overprotective or, I know you said you naturally are overprotective but you know some things they have to learn themselves.

You can't be too overprotective but. You kid and it has to be tough love and you know, I gotta own mine because I know a lot of times people will say man you're such an amazing dad. You're so dissing, you're so that. and I always challenge those people if I'm so amazing then why does my 17 year old not talk to me? Why why does she have a level of hatred towards me? Based on what this one is saying or what that one is saying If I am who I'm supposed to be to her

Then can't there be some type of foundation that she would have where, okay, even at that moment she heard something that wasn't easy to hear, but that she can feel comfortable enough to come to me and say, dad, can we have a conversation? Right, right. There's a disconnect.

There it is. And there are some things that I've done, and even for the things that I didn't do, I'll still take responsibility for it because she's hurting and she's hurting because of me. I own that, I own that. Like, and I was there with something I could do to change it, but as much as I wanna protect her,

as much as I wanna shield her, I'm gonna let her go through this process. Yeah, I know that's hard. It's not easy, you know what I'm saying? I'm blocked from a phone that I pay for. Wow. My last actual sighting of her was in a courtroom and she was testifying against me.

That's the last time that I pretty much got to lay eyes on her. And then everything else has been me trying to get her on the phone or try to something in a bench lap just stop. And some people are like, bro, you gotta keep fighting. You gotta, and it's like, listen, I can keep fighting, right? But she's in a very different place.

So my fight could push her even further. Yeah, especially this age. She already feel like, you know, she a young woman. She told me she was like, I'm different. This ain't the same old patients, like I'm different. And I know it was hard for her to hear, but I said, I don't like this version of you. Was I right for saying that?

Was I wrong for saying that? But that was on my spirit. Because I know the young lady that I raised. And I don't need to be experiencing this new version of you because this new version of you is coming from a place of hurt. And I'm not saying you wasn't hurt before, but you're definitely in a place of pain now.

But to you, it looks like happiness. You know why because I Ain't around my dad no more. We good He raised me on survival my mom raised me from a place of love like yeah, she got me right Was nothing nothing about His upbringing that was conducive like that was in the best interest of me, right? I Gotta swallow that. Yeah. When I go by, you know, and I'm in my house

and I go by pictures or go by a room that could be dedicated to her or whatever, like I constantly am reminded. And that's a deep thing to feel. But I'm constantly reminded and that's where the numbness comes from. Yeah, oh. So at at that event it was interesting. I was talking to was talking to

Think one of my home girls about it, but I had like I had I had felt like some emotion and I Was like yo, I'm growing. Because before I was super numb. And I wasn't. When I wrote this book, when I've done other interviews, the way things come out and there's no nothing. That was the first time you felt something.

You were like, ooh. And it felt good. So I'm hoping that the more I can express, the more conversations I can have, that tears will actually flow, which will probably be another chapter, right? Another level of healing that I'll be able to reach because that was the first time it's like I got choked up

because I felt myself like, wait a minute, what's going on? But it was this rush of like it was just pain it was it was all kind of things that I felt you know what I mean like and it happened like at the beginning because I was thanking my brother you know for changing my life and being a big part of that there was another point where you know my cousin so my mom was there my cousin was there I had family there and you know my cousin was there, I had family there.

And my cousin who just lost both her mom and her dad within the past year, but she talked about her mother that was in an abusive relationship until she passed. Like her husband was abusive. And I looked at my cousin and I was just like, the amount of pain that I felt because it's like, you wanna do something to bro, but I can't, that ain't my battle.

Yeah. And how many of us are in situations like you love a person, you express what you express, you be there for them, but some things people just have to go through. And I share that to say, my daughter's in a place where she got to go through whatever it is that she got to go through. Yeah. I'm not carrying that guilt no more. Mm-hmm.

Yeah. That guilt, that burden was heavy. I can imagine. It was really heavy. How does that affect your other children? Do you make sure you're present and that you don't let that relationship with her tarnish your relationship? That relationship, there's a lot of things that have affected so many things in all of their lives. Because my oldest daughter who's with my ex-wife like she's hurt. She lost her sister sister they were close in age she's 14

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You know, that was always her big sister. Like they talked, they kicked it, they bribed. Right. And now she don't have that. So we as adults gotta think about the things that we doing when we getting children involved in adult business. Yeah, oof. That's real too. My story is a product of that.

Me as a man, I may not have been the best partner, but don't let that get in the way of me being a father that's separate in the park. Yep, yep. Too many times women treat men the same. You wasn't a bad, you wasn't a good husband or a good partner or a good boyfriend, so you're a terrible father too.

And vice versa, and it's not fair it's not fair yeah no for sure so I have to I have to deal with that yeah I'm sorry and I'm definitely gonna pray for her because I know what it's like to be in a lost state at a young age and you think that everything is fine until you hit that wall you know and eventually it's gonna happen. You talked about privacy earlier. You're super private about your personal life. My team tried to, we tried to find out everything we could. They were like, we just can't find, we just,

we literally, after all the digging we allow, he's actually married. How long have you, I know you got divorced three years ago. You've recently- So I got divorced five years ago. Five years, okay. So you recently married, how's that going? Been married a year.

Yeah, okay. Working through it. Even when we got it done, like nobody knew we got married, nothing. Why are you so private? I don't think it's intentional. I think that I know based on my experiences, it always weighs on me because people that I thought would be happy for me or be supportive or love me have done the most damage.

So you want to protect things? So now, I don't even view it as that. That's what I'm saying. Like I'm having, like I wish she could be here right now to hear this because it's like this is another thing of my thought process. Because it's not that it's like it's the secret, but it's like who do you turn to for the good news? I've been through that.

Yeah. My mom was the only person that was a part of that zoom because when we got married it was just me her our young our son and I think she had one of her best guy friends or whoever it was it was like five people in the room. Oh wow. That's as real as it gets versus. It's huge. The huge situation, and there's so many people in this space

that you don't know what they're on. Yeah. I have the utmost respect for her. Because we've had a lot of hard conversations. And the thing that I respect the most is whether we do or we don't work out. We're in this place of love and just understanding and trying to grow

and be the best that we could be for each other. That's good, I like that. And I think just me being in the space that I'm in as a celebrity and dating, learning that everything. You get it time. No. You get it time. I get your flowers.

Thank you. But it is different when you're like dating someone and you want to keep it private. A lot of times other people are like, why can't we post? I don't want to take a picture because I'm not going to post it anyway. But you got to do what's best for you. I feel like us has grown men and grown women. If we're in a place in space where we're focused on people? They're part.

Because this will be my thing to your guy or whoever else. How many people did you see post that put on as if they're going to be forever? Mm-hmm. And then you hear something. Mm-hmm. You like. Or you see something. What? Yeah. And then you hear something. Or you see something. And it throws you off. It's a tremendous thing.

I don't have nothing in this world to prove other than to her. Now I do have a responsibility to these kids, but that's it. How many times somebody had hit my brain, even though you was married, like I didn't even know, like, and it's like, my bad. Because it wasn't intentional, right?

And I'm not trying to be, excuse me, secretive about it. If it come up, it come up. Like, I don't have a problem doing that. You know what I mean? Like, I'll address it, I, it come up. I don't have a problem doing that. You know what I mean? I'll address it, I'll speak to it. I'm not holding some secret because it's like I got this whole shlouful of women that I'm whatever that is.

Can you tell that's what people would think? I can't speak for everybody else. I'm just saying for me. Because me being honest with you, even in other relationships, when I was involved, I let those people know I'm married. When I was living that life. I'm living that life, yeah. Absolutely.

You never like shot, cause some men would be like, I don't know or act like they're leaving their wife or Completely x single. I've said that and I actually was I was in that process. Yeah, right. So I'm not trying to say that these weren't things that were going on But I've been on both sides of it I understand yeah, I understand why people have the notions that they have, but I do think that however people decide to move, just respect that. That's what's important. And then me and you, we share because, you know, I may not have been like

film and this and that, but being a public figure. You know what I mean? Like, it's my first time ever saying that. Like, it's crazy. But you, yeah, you are. I don't, because I don't move that way. You know what I'm saying? You always move like super sad.

I understand to your point, because it's like people know you. Even if they don't, hey, that's Josh. They're like, hey, bro, you should play for the house. Or, hey, bro, you should play for the Lakers. Or, don't, hey that's Josh, they're like, hey bro you used to play for the house or hey bro you used to play for the Lakers or you know all that. So I get it. But I don't know what people are on. And that's the thing that plagues me because I have personal situations personal situations where people who I felt could be trusted have done things that have made me think otherwise. And that's probably another reason why you're so guarded. I just now I moved away that I moved. Yeah, rightfully so. And I honestly feel like

everybody should do what they feel is best. For them. You know what I mean? Like you do that. Yeah. But then too when I talk to her it's like she's a little funny about stuff too. So I don't know. I get it right sometimes.

Because just things that she might like I remember when she was pregnant and I did a podcast This was a while ago and one of the one of the co-hosts was like, you know Oh, so you got your wife here. She's pregnant. Did it and you can see she's like a deer in headlights Because it was and she told like she told her people like I gotta cut that Didn't want that to be Everybody different man like you know what I'm saying? It's not my business, yeah. Everybody different, man. I try to uphold to the best of my ability. And I know that there are days where I succeed at it, and there are days that I don't.

But I own that. And I try my best to be better every day. That's awesome. There's this thing going around about a list of places that women don't want men to take them on first dates. What was you and your wife's like first date or how did y'all meet initially? First of all, outside of my wife.

I'm gonna look at this camera again, because this is silliness, right? This is pure silliness. When you rocking with somebody, if you truly rocking with somebody, that means y'all should be able to go on walks, go to Starbucks, go to the movies, do the smallest things, take a yoga class, whatever.

The places to go to eat, there has nothing to do with anything. Yeah, that's what I thought, because some of those ways I'm like, I actually think these are great first dates, you know? But again, like, is your focus on the person in the conversation? Or is your focus on the ambiance?

Or are you trying to get a taste of this life depending on the person. And it's like, I'm not doing that. Right. So what's your first date? Like if you were to, let's talk about, cause you're married, so let's talk about your wife. What was your first date?

Do you remember? I don't know if we can say that at the first date, but I mean the first time I met her we went to a cool little restaurant in Buckhead. That's a date. And I met, but it was like a group of us. I don't know if we consider that a first date, but I mean the first time I met her we went to a cool little restaurant in Buckhead. That's a date. And I met, met, but it was like a group of us. You know what I'm saying? I didn't even know her. You feel me?

So like the way that we kind of just bumped into each other, and I think the next time, you know, outside of that weekend, the next time that she came, I think the first thing that we did was we went to my boys, Hookah Lounds, super south side was in McDonough. Oh, he was way out there. Because he had some type of event we came through and supported and that was it. Like yeah, it wasn't about none of that. Because we also, when she came to visit, we went to the movies, definitely hit the Waffle House, all from Atlanta. Period. We definitely hit the Waffle House. I'm from Atlanta.

We go hit the Waffle House. You think we're gonna get me scrumbled? You feel me? That all-star special. Scattered top. Come on now. So I feel like we all that's cute, man. It sound good.

But if you don't know who you rocking with, and I talk about this too, man, we got people laying up with each other. You're doing all these things. You're seeing people in that form. But you ain't seeing they heart. You ain't seeing who's actually the person that when something hit the fan,

that's the person you're gonna have to deal with. Hello, that is so true. So, listen, man, you wanna go to Applebee's, do you? Right. You know, cause some, and I think, I feel like for you, right, if somebody did like the simple things, I feel like that would be very important to me.

Yeah, absolutely. You know what I'm saying? Like somebody taking the time to write a letter or, Oh my God, I said that. Just doing just little things that are like heartfelt because it's not, we're all busy. We are. So the fact that you took the time

to even write a sentence on a piece of paper, even if it's that small little thing, just to share your appreciation of thoughts or, hey, let's go do yoga, let's go, you know, whatever. Or like, let's make this sexy, like let's go have a therapy session together. Why not? Let that be the first day.

High five. That's right. I'm about to lay it all on the table. Still want to be with me now? I'm telling you. That's real. We would cut, you know what? We would cut through a lot of BS if we did that too.

I like that. I'm a big fan of that. That's good. For me, like, you know, everybody's like, you know, take your time and do this and do that. Nah, I don't mind. Let me share this with you. I got all these kids, I got these different women, I got this, I got that.

Are you cool with that or not? Right, that's good. Josh, thank you. This has been good. Thank you so much. Thank you for being open. Thank you for being vulnerable. Thank you for being vulnerable. And guys, please go get the book.

You can order. I know it's on Amazon. Where else can you get this? It is, so Relations Matter Live. We got it on there. So Amazon, bars and novels. We try, we out here. Now you out here, so proud of you.

You see, that's your girl's copy. Yeah, I got my own. You got your own, so you know. But I'm to buy my own, too, because I like to support. So thank you for bringing me. I'm going to have you sign this one for me. But thank you, because hers was signed, too. And look, I did this on purpose. It's a super easy read.

It is. I love easy reads. Because a lot of times people, either because you're busy or you may be the person that don't like to read, but I wanted to be very, I wanted those hundred pages to be very impactful and kind of like the alchemist. So maybe, you know. One of my favorite books. I read it every year.

So you end up going back to it because there's different things that you get out of it. And that was my goal along with creating the conversation. So I wanted to be and do something different. I'm not sugarcoating nothing that I went through. I'm not putting no media training in the book. I want people to know real raw me and that way you get to understand into who I am, the way that I move, the why, the everything.

You know what I'm saying? And I know some people, you gonna be in that one? I still love you. Because I am you. Even though you might feel the way, but the same things that we share stories or whatever guarantee you, there'll be a lot in there. Where you're like, wow, I didn't know you went through that.

No, seriously, reading this, it was a lot of parallels. In the healing, that's the most important thing. Yes. What do those steps look like? And that's why I wanted to make sure I put those in there, because that's important. Give you this, but how do we overcome it? I love that.

But thank you so much. No, thank you. There was one thing I wanted, before we close, I thought this is important to share with the readers. You said, repeat after me, I know my value and worth and my decisions reflect self-love. And I wanna leave you guys with that before we close out because I thought that was really powerful

to tell yourself that every day. Because a lot of times we lose sight of our own worthiness. I do it. So I have a piece of paper and I wrote down these affirmations and it's in my like toiletry bag. So I gotta brush my teeth multiple times a day. My goal is every time I come to that bag, I'm gonna crack that paper open.

It takes me probably 45 seconds to read each line as a reminder because I'm human. I get frustrated, you know what I'm saying? Sometimes I don't feel loved or respected. Sometimes I'm bothered because I see dads that receive love from their kids and I yearn for that. I see, I mean the list goes on and on and on, but I can speak to that because I go through my battles too.

And I want people to know that, you know, I'm no different. So I put the time and the effort in and I just, you know, I don't do it for the accolades or the shine, but it's nice to be acknowledged. Absolutely. You know what I mean? So I'm human, man. And the acknowledgement that I want is for my loved ones. That's all.

For sure. Because I really do try. I really my loved ones. That's all. For sure. Because I really do try. I really do. That's good. Well, my hats off to you. Congratulations on the book. Seriously. In closing, we do what's called positive outcomes, where we give advice to a listener who wrote

into us. Okay. And this week, her name is Sherry. And it says, Hi Ms. Fristel, my name is Sherry. And it says, hi Ms. Crystal, my name is Sherry. I've been in a relationship for eight years. I have two children, ages six and seven. We live together and have been through a lot together. We aren't engaged or even talking about marriage.

And anytime I bring up the subject or attend another friend's wedding, he refuses to go and doesn't show interest or enthusiasm. I would love for us to get married someday soon, but I think he's more worried about the financial aspect, which I understand, but I'll settle for the courtroom wedding. I don't know what to do,

but I can't go on like this anymore. Should I give him an ultimatum? Well, first thing, men hate ultimatums, so I wouldn't do that. But, ooh, eight years. You've been with somebody for eight years, Well, first thing, men hate ultimatums, so I wouldn't do that. But, eight years, you've been with somebody for eight years and you already have children, already having children with someone. This is an easy answer. Tell them.

Tell them. To your point, you never give an ultimatum, but you got to put yourself first. And you know how many women, at least that I've heard, that have regrets. Oh yeah. And regret is a silent killer. And in order for us to move past, we have to be able to put ourselves first because in a way it sounds like settling, right?

Yeah, you got the eight year relationship, there's kids involved. But those feelings can harbor into something else. And that's why it's important that she address what she feels is important to her. Yeah, communicate. And have that conversation. I'm not saying do anything drastic,

but there's so much power in having that conversation. I'm not saying do anything drastic, but there's so much power in having that conversation. Now if this gentleman, God bless him, if he continues to avoid, then you might need to do some self-searching and kind of seek where you're at, what it is that you want to do, and how you want to move. Absolutely. Because for me on the flip side, and let me share this with her, you, her, both. Yes, right. I was with my ex-wife for 11, 12 years. We had three children together.

I already had a child outside of the relationship that I brought into that relationship. And making a decision to walk away was hard yet one of the most fulfilling things that I've done in my life. Because that person, that situation was stunting where I needed to be in my life. But at the same time, that person in that situation

woke me up as to how much more work needs to be done. So no matter what, I'm still grateful for her and that experience because it helped me to grow and mature into a much better version of myself. Right, that's amazing. And sometimes people can be there for that moment, but please don't allow the fact that you have those children to stop you from where you need to go.

And that's a hard decision. A very hard decision. For anybody to make. And I wouldn't be able to tell her that. If you hadn't done it yourself. If I hadn't done it myself. Because the other thing too is, I don't know if she has two boys, two girls, son, daughter,

but you're teaching your kids. To settle and to stay. Not only that, you're just setting a foundation for so many behaviors. That you don't even realize what you're doing. And kids know. You think they don't? They do. And then know. You think they don't? They do.

And then the other thing is like, you're now, so now basically my son or daughter gotta meet your son or daughter. That's it. That's so good. I think that was a good answer. That was so good. All right, so we do what I'm going through and what I'm growing through. And based on where I am in this episode, I am going through, continue to evolve and heal

from my own childhood traumas and growing through understanding that everything is a season. When I feel like it's too heavy, this too shall pass. I got a question for you. Yes. What is one of your childhood traumas that you're going through? Who's doing the interview? Wouldn't be right if it wasn't conversational. That's good, you're right.

I want you to know too like Which your work and this platform that you have you're helping heal a lot of people Yeah, so don't don't take that opportunity lightly But I would like to know you like to know if you were open for sharing. Yes. I would I've touched on this on my Get To Know Me episode, but it's something that I still work on and it's just the upbringing. And I think that's where a lot of things

that I read in your book, I was like, I've been through those things, you know, growing up and as like you said, you wanna be careful how you say it, cause don't want to hurt people. So we can talk about offline. OK. That's fair. But yeah, definitely.

But I want to get a chance to, because I know this is your platform, but still, it's important. I appreciate that. I want to tell you, I appreciate you. And I love you. And I'm proud of you because everything that you're doing in your life and just trying to be the best version of yourself

is not easy, it's the hardest job that we don't receive enough appreciation for facing you. So I wanted to genuinely tell you that, I don't even know you, but I do think that you're so amazing. Thank you. Thank you. And I just want to tell you, man, keep, keep, keep going to work.

And, and you have a brother in me now. Thank you. So, you know, I know that it's not, it's not easy. And, you know, hopefully, you know, I've done my part. Hopefully we can continue to serve together. Yes, absolutely. But I'm really proud of you because this is, this is really amazing. Thank you. And I know it's not easy. Yes, absolutely. But I'm really proud of you, because this is really amazing. Thank you.

And I know it's not easy. It's not. And I could tell it wasn't, even when I threw that back at you, it was like, yeah, nah, we gonna talk, all right, cool. Now for sure. But I think, you know, for your supporters to be able to see you have this moment,

it's truly powerful. Thank you. Because there's beauty in that. Yeah. And you just took another step. I did. Thank you so much. I'm gonna give it back to you. I don't want no problems. No, all right now we got to have a no-hold-nother podcast. Come on now. We ended with Keep It Blank, sweetie. And for this one, I will say, I think I've used this before, but keep it healing, sweetie. Keep healing and keep evolving. Yeah. Keep it gracious, sweetie.

I like it. Keep forgiving, sweetie. Yes! That's good. Keep fighting. Keep fighting for you. That is so good. Thank you so much.

Wow, didn't expect to be brought to tears at the end of this episode. But guys, I hope you enjoyed this. Josh, you were amazing. Seriously, such a good conversation. Guys, if you want to write into our positive outcomes, listen to the letter, write into keep it positive, sweetie, at gmail.com and it's sweetie with an IE. You can follow Kips on all platforms at keep it positive, sweetie. You can follow me on all platforms at LUV, Chris, Renee, Josh, tell the people where

they can find you. Josh 21, Powell on Instagram. Do we still do Twitter? Not really. People do everything. Yeah. I'm on TikTok but not really. Mostly everything is Instagram but you know check us out what I wish I knew. This lovely project. Yes and then your podcast. Oh relationships matter. The podcast. We actually just our first episode, we're airing on In the Black Network. Awesome. On the 15th.

Amazing, congratulations. So please watch that. If I'm not mistaken, from what I heard, I think we're gonna start with this Steven Jackson episode. Oh wow, oh that's gonna be good. Y'all do not wanna miss this episode. And then you don't wanna miss mine because I'm gonna be on there too. Definitely don't want to miss yours for sure.

But this is so beautiful and amazing. Thank you. I'm truly humbled. Me too. And this is also a big deal to be in your space. Yeah. So I don't take it away from you. I'm very particular about who I let in this space.

Absolutely. Definitely because we knew mutual people, like even just inviting people into my home for safety reasons. Absolutely. I'm very particular about who I bring in here, but also because this is a space and people leave energy in your space. So, I knew you were good people,

so I'm so happy that we got to this. Truly humbled, and I took my shoes off. You did. We appreciate it. Thank you. Thank you so much. Absolutely. All right guys, in the meantime and in between time,

you know what to do. Keep it positive, sweetie. Bye. I wanna give thanks and praise to Heavenly Father and Heavenly Mother for allowing us to come together. I ask for all the blessings and support as we continue this mission to serve. I'm continuing to open the hearts and minds of many praying that you continue to bless these two queens on their journeys and everything that they have on on.

Bless their families, bless their loved ones. Protect this King behind the camera. Make sure that he continues to say bless. And just continue to bring healing amongst all of us. Continue to bring understanding, continue to bring love, continue to bring a plan of action that serves you and where you want us to go and how you want us to be. And we love you and we truly thank you

and we lift this prayer in your name. Amen. Amen. You better. Come on man, you see if you want to be silent.