KILL TONY - KILL TONY #288

Episode Date: August 24, 2018

Too Short, Luis J Gomez, Josh Martin, Joel Jimenez, Chris Dillon, Jeremiah Watkins, Malcolm Hatchett, Tony Hinchcliffe, Brian Redban - Date: 08/20/2018 Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

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Call 1-866-531-2600 or visit connectsontario.ca. Please play responsibly. Hey, this is Red Band and you're listening to Kill Tony. Go to our website, deathsquad.tv. There you have all the past episodes. We also have tour dates. Click on tour dates and not only can you see us live every Monday at the World Famous Comedy Store, but we are going on the road. We are in Lansing, Michigan, Grand Rapids, Michigan, Detroit, Michigan. And then we're going to be in Toronto for Just for Laughs. And then we're going to Texas.

We're going to be in San Antonio, Austin, Houston, and Fort Worth. All these tickets can be found at DeathSquad.TV and click on Tour Dates. Go to TonyHinchcliffe.com. That's Tony's website for everything Golden Pony. That's TonyHinchcliffe.com. Ryan J. Ebelt, he's the house artist. He draws every episode. He drew the book and posters.

Go to RyanJEbelt.com. If you want the Kill Tony t-shirt, go to ShopSquad.tv. That's the official merchandise of the Death Squad universe. We to kill Tony shirt we have death squad shirts death squad hats mugs shop squad dot TV and now here's a brand new episode of kill Tony hey this is RedBang coming to you live from the world famous Comedy Store main room. We're about to episode of Kill Tony. Go for Tony Hinchcliffe.

What? Hello. Welcome. Make some fucking noise, everybody. We're here at the number one live podcast in the world. Brian Red Band is here. It's another fun episode of Kill Tony. We got Ryan J. Ebel drawing tonight's episode live from right there at the blank sheet of paper.

He's already started. It's going to be a good one. It's good to be here at our home of the Comedy Store. We've been on the road continuously lately, and it's good to be back here. However, for you watching via live stream on YouTube right now, some good news. More dates coming at you. November 20th, Lansing, Michigan. We do a stand-up show and Kill Tony.

The next night, Grand Rapids in Michigan. Stand-up show and Kill Tony. And then the next night, a stand-up show and Kill Tony in Detroit, Michigan. That's fun. Three days later, we're in Toronto. After coming back here and doing another Kill Tony, we fly from Detroit to here, and then two days later, Toronto,

Canada. JFL Just for Laughs with a Kill Tony on September 28th at midnight. That's a Friday night at midnight in Toronto. That's going to be fun. October 3rd to the 6th, I'm doing Chicago all by myself. Just doing stand-up comedy at Zany's

working it out at one of my favorite comedy clubs in the world and then breaking news we teased about it last week about October 12th and here is the official announcement October 12th will be

Kill Tony Mania. For the first time ever, there will be two Kill Tonys in one night in San Francisco, California. That's right, San Fran, after multiple sold-out shows at the Punchline.

This year, we've done multiple thing about that, multiple sold out shows this year. We are going back on October 12th to do Kill Tony Mania. That is its own one night only, two show event. Tickets are available starting Wednesday. The exclusive pre-sale

at LiveNation.com. Use the pre-sale code REMIX and you can get tickets exclusively There we go. LiveNation.com for that. General admission will go on sale Friday. Yeah, and that's at Cobb's Comedy Club. That's great.

Cobb's Comedy Club. It's huge. It's three times the size of the Punchline, owned by the same amazing people up in San Franz. So it's going to be a crazy night. First ever Kill Tony Mania. The next week I'm in Connecticut doing stand-up by myself at the Mohegan Sun. And then November 9th, Boston, Providence, Venus de Milo gets its own Kill Tony and stand-up show.

That is a huge venue. I looked it up. I'm pretty sure it's 1,200 seats that we have to try to get people to drive from Boston and Providence to. But last time we did Boston, had hundreds and hundreds of people. San Antonio, the 13th of November. Austin, the 14th. Houston, the 15th. Those are all stand-ups and Kill Tonys.

And then the 16th and 17th, Fort Worth, Texas. Four stand-up shows, one Kill Tony. And then... Breaking news. More breaking news. We're happy to announce that next week on this podcast, on Kill Tony,

we are crossing the streams and having the podcast known as the H3 Podcast. Ethan and Hila Klein will be here next week, everybody. They're huge. They're awesome. So, a little YouTube, a little incestual YouTube meeting. Should we say what we figured out about them? That I look like Ethan and you look like... Yeah, I look like his wife.

Yeah. It's true. Brian and I look like them. Yeah. That's going to be weird. If I had longer hair. We're beautiful people, her and I. Very Alanis Morissette-esque.

Yes. And you know what's fun, though, is I like to keep looking young. You know what helps me? Infinite CBD. It offers the cleanest, healthiest, and purest form of CBD available. What is CBD? I'll tell you. It's 100% legal.

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I put CBD on my neck. It goes away in like a minute. It's that good. You know all about this. It is incredible. My wife has full-blown scoliosis. She has pain that she told me. She goes, I never even complain about it anymore.

I've had it my whole life. She rubbed infinite CBD on her back the next morning, no pain, for the first time in her life. It was like a miracle. That's fucking crazy. It actually works. It solves chronic pain, inflammation, anxiety, and more. You can go to their website, InfiniteCBD.com, and if you use the promo code TONY15, you'll get 15% off any purchase. It's legal. Wherever you're listening from, around the world right now, Saudi Arabia, go to InfiniteCBD.com, use the promo code TONY15,

and you will get 15% off any purchase. It's great. It's not going to get you high. No, I've tried it. But it's going to make you feel good. It's going to make your pain go away. Yeah. All right. That's it. Cha cha-ching money in the bank we did it you guys ready to start this episode or what we've had a lot of fun times on this show over the past five years and every week I always have two of the

funniest human beings in the world to be guests on this show boy oh boy am I excited about this one ladies and gentlemen put your hands together for Too Short and and the world to be guests on this show. Boy, oh boy, am I excited about this one. Ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together for Too Short and Louis J. Gomez. What? Oh, shit. Two, three, four.

I go on and on. Can't understand how I last so long. Ladies and gentlemen, Too Short! Yeah! Ooh, ooh! Hell yes! One of the greatest humans in the world. Rap legend. Too Short is here.

Legion of Skank Zone. Luis J. Gomez is here. Octagon Fighter getting ready for a huge fight on October 25th. August. It's actually fighting. It's Saturday, Tony. It's not three months from now. It's fucking Saturday.

Did I say three months from now? Yeah, you said October 25th. Oh, August 25th. Live from Las Vegas, Nevada. Really took the steam out of that fight. That is Saturday, five days away. That's Ellis Mania, right? I can already see the post-fight report.

Louis J looked like he was three months out of training. Fuck, yeah. I'm excited about that. And too short, as here he has a new podcast called Blow the Whistle. I love it. What's up, what's up? Hell yeah. This is an honor to have you on this show.

I've always been a fan of your music, but this past week when I knew that you were coming here, I've been exclusively only listening to you. I've been calling everyone, everyone a bitch lately. It's been amazing. I'm pumped. We're going to watch some comedians do comedy. We're going to talk to them.

We're going to interview them, and it's going to be a lot of fun. I have a bucket absolutely filled with the names. You guys know how it works. You get 60 seconds of stage time. You know your 60 seconds is up when you hear the sound of a kitty. That's what it sounds like.

Wrap it up then. Earl, you're going to bring out the angry West Hollywood bear. Very good. You guys get it? You ready to start the show? This is it. This is how it really starts. Oh, yeah. The band. I forgot all about the band.

I can't believe that. Wow, I was so excited. That's why I was all jumbling. I was like, what are you doing? It's all about Too Short to me right now. I'm a little bit nervous, to be honest. By the way, I was on Too Short's podcast the other day. I got to go to his studio, one of the coolest studios.

It had a barbershop in it. That was fucking amazing. We got a lot of shit up in there, man. Yeah, it's awesome, man. I thought you were just making a racist joke. No, no. They really did. It was crazy.

They had a barbershop. They had a barbecue pit. It was crazy. The barbershop had a recording studio inside of it also. Like, it was craziness. It was awesome. It's crazy, man. What?

There was a recording studio inside of the barbershop that was inside of a recording studio? Yeah. That's some Black Matrix shit. We have a band on this show. They, every single week, do different characters. I never know what they're going to be or what they're going to do.

And amazingly enough, they're able to commit to these characters throughout the entire show. Ladies and gentlemen, put your hands together for the best damn band in the land. It's the Kill Tony Band. Jeremiah Watkins, Joel Jimenez.

No way. What? Oh. Wow. Oh my goodness. Wow. This is incredible. Oh my goodness. Wow. This is incredible.

Wow. This is clearly Back to the Future. I love how he had to borrow his mom's kitchen gloves for this outfit. Hello. You are clearly the doctor from Back to the Future Great Scott

I had a feeling you were going to say that You really know how to nail it, don't you? And, uh I traveled back to 1995 Is Too Short Still the number one rapper in the world? is too short still the number one rapper in the world? How dare you, Doc? And then back here, clearly,

we have what appears to be Selena Gomez's little brother. Tony, we went back to the future and the president wants me to go back to Mexico. That's Martinez McFly. Love it. Well, we're here. We're going to be here. This is going to be an interesting episode. We have the two main characters from Back to the Future for the next hour

and a half with us. This should be a lot of fun. So let's see what happens. I've already explained the game. After, if you get pulled out, you get 60 seconds, and after that we talk with you about anything in the world. Maybe I find out some special talents that you have,

something about your past life, your family, anything. You guys ready to start this thing? It's Kill Tony live. Luis J. Gomez, Too Short, Red Band, Tony, and the characters from Back to the Future. Wow. It's like that, it begins. You guys excited for this or what?

All right, your first comedian getting an uninterrupted 60 seconds tonight goes by the name of Sam Wright. Here we go. Sam Wright, here he comes. A slow jog from the audience corner. I like it. Ladies and gentlemen, Sam Wright.

Hey everybody, how's it going? I just came in from Long Beach. Nice, somebody else is being financially crippled by parking tickets. I moved to Long Beach about three months ago, and I moved into an area that I come to find out is right in between a high gay area and a high gang area, which I didn't notice until I got pressed by a gay gang. And immediately I found out that I've been scared in life to be shot,

stabbed, but never fucked in the ass. So it's a new experience, but I'm acclimating well, I think. I don't know. Flattering, I guess. But I also thought about it. There must be a gay gang rapper out there also. And how depressing would it be if that became a top ten hit?

I mean, I'm going to be riding around in my car, and all of a sudden Drake is remixing All I see is this gang and this bitch And you know if I come you getting banged in this bitch All right. Fuck yeah. Sam Wright getting this party started with a poof. Fuck yeah.

Tony, I have something to say. Yes. I watched the set and I was like, jokes? Where we're going, we don't need jokes. Wow. We are off and running. Sam, Lewis J. Gomez, halfway through your set, leaned into me and goes, did you see where he put his hand in his pocket?

That's where he ran out of stuff. leaned into me and goes, you see where he put his hand in his pocket? That's where he ran out of stuff. There's a moment when you go back and watch a video where his first punchline didn't hit, and he went, and he put his hand in his pocket. And that was a moment where you saw a man be defeated.

And I don't know if anybody else noticed that, but I noticed it. I was literally looking for more jokes in my pocket. You did not find them. Did not. How long have you been doing stand-up? Actually, I've been coming here for two months trying to get called up, and so I could be my first time on stage here.

Wow! This is your first time ever on stage? Ever. Hell yeah. Look at that. You can tell he gave up because he's wearing his Lakers sweatpants. He's like, they're never going to call me. I've been getting cozy here.

I dressed up the first night, I said, and two months later. This is the what? Two months later. Oh, so you signed up every Monday for two months. For two months straight, yeah. And you decided not to practice anything anywhere else. I mean, on the way over here in the car is about it, but yeah. You're like, if I'm going to start stand-up,

I'm going to make sure I do it on the number one live podcast in the world. If I'm going to bomb, I'm going to do it-up, I'm going to make sure I do it on the number one live podcast in the world. If I'm going to bomb, I'm going to do it around the globe all at once. Absolutely. Keep a little something in my pocket to remind me about what my next joke is. Oh, paperclip. Paperclips are all bent out of shape. So what were you trying to say, Gay Gang?

Did you join it? Not yet. But, you know, the pressure, it's got a lot of bonuses to it I think, so we'll see. And how did you meet this gay gang? Is that a real thing? No, but I just moved over there and I live right in between the area they call the gay ghetto

and then there's like a high gang area that I moved into So it's just a fantasy for you, something that you wanted to happen. At this point, you look in that creek. It's called the Gay Ghetto? Why do they call it that? Why don't they just call it the Gato? It's right next to the hood.

The Gayborhood. The Gay Ghetto. Damn, that's interesting. Where's that area, so that I know to avoid it? No, I'm kidding. I mean, Gay Ghetto are two of my favorite search words. I knew you'd like that one. Listen to your hateful giggle.

The homo hood. So, Sam, what do you do for work? I work with developmentally disabled and I sell weed. That's so nice that you let them... Wow, that's interesting. Is there a connection there? You work with the disabled and you sell weed. Do you get people retarded high?

Just myself. I think it's so great that you let the disabled people you work with write your jokes for you. That is the coolest thing, man. It's such a nice thing for you to do. I actually thought about it when I took the job. I was like, I'm going to get some material out of this.

Hopefully next time I get a call, I'm going to work on those. Wow. Too short. What do you think of Sam Wright's style? This is his first time ever on stage. All I can think is, uh, let me get some weed, bro.

Alrighty. Cool. Hell yeah, there you go. So Sam, is this something that you've always wanted to do, or is it just something that sparked up two months ago? Have you always wanted to bomb in front of a room of 200 people? No, it's a

new goal for me. Yeah, no, I've been listening to your show a little bit. My buddy got me into it, and so since I saw that, I thought it'd be a good way right down the road. So I live in Long Beach, so I figured I'd try it out. Right. Yes, Doc. How long have you looked like a hipster Mr. Clean? Just look at him!

I was going to say he looks like Jason Gatham. For you podcast listeners, he's a skinny, clean head-shaven, a little bit of a beard. You have a lot of tattoos. I see an anchor with a girl above it. What's that? Some Sailor Jerry tattoos.

You drink a lot? Once upon a time. I try to know better now. You don't drink anymore? Not as much. Right. Man. Besides here, actually, every Monday.

How much do you have to drink to get a Sailor Jerry tattoo down your forearm like that? Enough. All right. Well, you are one of my favorite interviews I've ever had on the show, Sam. You really know how to keep the momentum going. You seem very nervous. Because describe that, I always feel like. People don't know what it's like to go up on stage the first time.

It's fucking, dude, it's terrifying. It's terrifying, especially when you're not funny. Like, another level of scary. I mean, could you imagine? I mean, Sam, what's some other stuff about your life that you could talk about other than the fact that you work with special needs people, right?

You sell weed. What else? Any other fun facts about Sam Wright? Do you have any special talents? I sew. You sew? I sew. Wow.

Close. I sew. You sew? I sew. Wow. Clothes. Like you sew with like a needle and thread? Or machine. You have a quilt?

You have a sewing machine. I have a sewing machine, yeah. You have a sewing machine. Absolutely. You have like an actual machine and you go like that and shit? Very slowly, yeah. Wow. How does that happen? How do you end up with a sewing machine? How did you learn how to sew? Very slowly, yeah. Wow.

How does that happen? How do you end up with a sewing machine? How did you learn how to sew? Goodwill went to school. You went to school for sewing? You did? Yeah. I went back in time and visited his father. His father is also a pussy.

I get sewing. Sewing's pretty cool. What do you sew? You sew your own clothes, like shirts and stuff? Yeah, you should talk about it. Your whole act tonight was so-so. Alright, Sam. Well, congratulations. It was your first time ever on stage. There he goes. That's what this show's all about.

Sometimes it's someone from America's Got Talent. Sometimes it's American History X's first time on stage show. It's exciting. Anything can happen here. We have characters of all shapes and sizes. Up next, wow, with three exclamation points at the end of his name. This sort of scares me.

Put your hands together, I believe this is his first time here, for Mark Henderson. Mark Henderson, here we go. It's three exclamation points. Mark Henderson. What's up, tall people? If you're a person that's out here driving around illegally,

let people know that before they get in the car with you. My boy got put over for the illegal tint that was on his windows. This dude driving, I'm in a passenger seat. He gonna turn to me like, so Cece me real fast, my license suspended. I'm like, so I can go to jail, my license suspended too. When the police officer

came to the window, we was both in the back seat till I see Bell song. Like, is there a problem officer? Like, is there a problem, officer? A little bit about myself. When I had a rough childhood, when I was real young, man, my daddy ran out and left us.

It was real sad. Had to replace my daddy with an imaginary daddy. Then my imaginary daddy left us, too. For the same reason my real daddy did. Because we stopped believing in him. Wow, look at that. That was awesome. That's how you do it in the pros right there.

Mark Henderson, ladies and gentlemen. Live on Kill Tony. That was great. Mark Henderson. Or as I call him, too shorter. Bill Tony. That was great. Mark Henderson. Or as I call him,

Too Shorter. Mark, that was fucking awesome, dude. How long have you been doing stand-up? A very long time. I say that because I ain't made it yet. Just moved out here to L.A. trying to make it, so. It's all good. How long have you been doing stand-up?

Maybe like 15 years. 15 years. No. I know the clock tower. Where at? Where you been doing it for 15 years? Chicago, Atlanta. I was in New York for a minute.

Wow. All over. Well, you know what they say about New York. If you can't make it there, you can't. I'm going to make it, though. Trust me. No you can't make it there, you can't. I'm going to make it, though. Trust me. No, I love it. Absolutely, Mark. There's no doubt about it.

This audience doesn't bullshit. I don't know if you saw the guy before you, but this audience doesn't bullshit. Wow. I love it. You put three exclamation points after your name, and Red Band made a point. He whispered to me when you were on your way up. He goes, this guy does not look like he needs three exclamation points after your name. And Redman made a point. He whispered to me when you were on your way up. He goes, this guy does not look like he needs three exclamation points. You're walking slow.

You didn't seem excited at all. It was the exact opposite of him. No, it really caught me off guard. I didn't have the space to go up. I love it. I feel like because he's so short that he needs the exclamation points. He's like, bam, I'm here. Look at me.

Yeah, definitely overcompensating or something. It's his version of driving a Ferrari. He just can't afford the Ferrari. So, Mark, this is incredible. You've been doing it, we'll say, 15 plus years is the answer. No, stop, stop.

Oh, no. Oh, no. We must strike lightning on the clock. And so you've tried it, you've done it everywhere. And that's incredible. Why LA now? Why all those other places first? People gave me a lot of bad advice about my career.

They were saying, don't come to LA until you're ready. I should have been came and grew out here. But it's a learning experience. Got to meet a lot of good, cool people. Used to open for Dion Cole. You think if you lived in LA, you would have grown. It's a sunlight issue. OK, I had no idea what he was talking about.

He used to open up Dion Cole? Dion Cole, currently opening up for Rodman, tour with the Dale Givens, Lil Rel Howery, I was one of his first openers. They all fired me for some reason. Well, you're very funny. What's the longest set you've ever done? Five foot two. Oh, come on.

I hope you win on Saturday. Oh, thanks, man. He's rooting for you. There you go. I hope you win on Saturday. Oh, thanks, man. I like this guy now. Mark knows how to do a set, the interview, and keep the energy going. I like this guy. Will you come out and be my mascot? That'd be hilarious.

Put you in a leprechaun suit. I just came from the future. Bad news. You lose. You lose. Bad news, you lose. Jeremiah Watkins is in full destroyer mode again. Wow. Coming off that red hot chili peppers last week.

I mean, this guy is on fire. So Mark, other than the fact that Jeremiah is going to make it way before you did, how long have you been in L.A.? It'll be a year in September. A year. And how's that gone for you so far? L.A. is very different. It's hard to get up out here. It's like if you're not friends with the person that's over the bucket.

Too short. You're laughing over there. Is there something you want to say to Mark? Do you have any advice for him? Yeah, I do have advice. You said D.C., Atlanta, where were you? Atlanta, Chicago. Chicago's my home city, but Chicago, Atlanta,

New York. To me, it just seemed like a lot. I don't have nothing negative to say, so I feel like I've seen a lot of comedy shows, and you probably should fix it up a little bit. Come out in your comedy clothes the night you're going to perform, because you're funny. I'm trying to figure out what the fuck is wrong. I do dress up. How are you funny and you don't fucking make it?

What happens? What are you doing? Why did everybody fire you? Something's going on. You some kind of asshole or something? I just want to know what's going on. There's something wrong, man. I can't answer the question. I cannot answer that question. I would like to know myself.

Go on and on. Can't understand how I last so long. I must have superpowers. From Short Dog, man, hey, try a new outfit every time you tell jokes. Just try new clothes. Bitch! I literally, I literally do agree with Too Short's

advice. There is like a lot going on here. You really need those glasses? Yes, I do need the glasses. I cannot see without them. But I do dress up better when I'm on stage, when I'm on tour and stuff like that. I'm just doing open mics out here. I don't agree with any of these guys right now. Listen, dude, you're a fucking nerd.

That's what you are, okay? You need to be the fucking nerd that you are. Dude, you don't need to fucking dress up and fucking try to be what you aren't. By the way, I'm not saying... Doggy, listen, there are no tiny black nerd comedians. This is a specific niche that you can get into. I'm not even saying dress up.

I'm just saying don't wear that shirt again. All right. Anything but that. It goes great with that jacket, though. Mark, I got good news for you, dude. You're absolutely fucking hilarious. He's on Instagram at comedian Mark Henderson with C at the end of the mark. Anything else you want to promote or anything like that?

Is there any other way people can find you? Yeah, I got sketches on my Instagram, my Facebook, YouTube, all of that. Comedian Mark Henderson. Clean comedy and TV. I do clean comedy. I love that. That was a clean set? Yeah, everything I do. That's actually

a great mark of a good clean comedy is when you don't even notice that it's clean and it just kind of just blends in. These are fucking animals. They want to hear filthy shit and nobody gave a fuck. That was awesome, dude. That's actually a really good sign. It's actually incredible, yeah. Appreciate y'all too, man. A lot of love.

It's very easy to be clean when you can stand up in a bathtub when it's filled and it only goes up to your neck. We're about the same size. Come on, Tony. You are absolutely hilarious, Mark. Thanks for coming on the show. We're about the same size. Come on, Tony. You are absolutely hilarious, Mark. Thanks for coming on the show. There you go. Mark Henderson.

Comedian Mark Henderson. On Instagram, on Twitter. There we go. From someone's very first time ever on stage that's waited for two months before doing a set to do their first minute to a guy that's done tens of thousands of minutes

in 15 years. Oh, my God. You guys having fun yet? All right. I pulled another name out of the bucket. Put your hands together for Robert Thompson. Robert Thompson. All the out of the bucket. Put your hands together for Robert Thompson. Robert Thompson. All the way from the back.

All the way from the farthest corner. Here he comes. Wow. All right. What is this? Put your hands together for Robert Thompson. And if you all have PTSD, I know I do. When I was 14 years old, my family left without me to see the Lord of the Rings film.

And I had a cold, but I kind of played it up like I had pneumonia in the 1800s. Like, Mama, Papa, I'll be okay. I'll watch Jerry Springer. Ciao. And they left me, okay? So I did what any other 14-year-old boy did, and I looked up some porn. And I found that there was a lot of pop-ups

that weren't to my liking. You know, you're kind of exploring things. There's a grandma fisting popping up. I'm like, I don't know if I fancy that. But something very shocking popped up in my 14-year-old eye view. It was an orangutan on top of a woman. And yeah, my boner went inverted. I cursed that computer that brought me to such a dark place. I still have nightmares about it, actually. It's taken me a lot to eat bananas again or go to the

zoo or even watch the Jungle Book again. I just think of King Louie the big old boner. I want to fuck like you. Thank you. Robert Thompson. Wow. You bombed in a suit.

I know. I knew that was going to happen. Oh my god. Where'd you get that big was going to happen. Oh, my God. Where'd you get that big and tall and unfunny? Oh, yes. Yes. I've never seen a white guy in a Steve Harvey suit before. Wow. Grimace had a yard sale.

I don't know. Wow. Steve Harvey had a yard sale? No, no. Grimace, the purple guy from McDonald's. Oh, wow. Grimace had a yard sale. I don't know. Wow. Steve Harvey had a yard sale? No, no. Grimace, the purple guy from McDonald's. Oh, wow. Grimace, yeah. You're dressed how Tushar thought the last comic should be dressed.

I actually took it as... See, now this is a nice outfit. This is some shit right here. This guy's going to make it. I don't know nothing about comedy, but this motherfucker's gonna make it. Hell yeah. I took his advice real quick, man. Robert, you have incredible luck on this show.

You've gotten pulled out of the bucket three or four times in the past couple months. We know quite a bit about you. Why are you wearing that? What happened? I don't know. I think, yeah, maybe it was a premonition from Mr. Short happened? I don't know. I think maybe it was a premonition from Mr. Short here. I don't know, man. I felt like this was just a fabulous night.

I got Luis J. Gomez. Too short. Let me ask you something. Did you buy that for tonight? No, no. I had it. What did you wear that to before this? Halloween Joker costume, something like that.

Did you go to a grapes funeral or something? You look like you showed up to audition as the bucket. Yeah, it was for something, man. For a bar mitzvah. I don't know. I found it at McDonald's. What? Whose bar mitzvah are you going to? My.

It was for a show. My band was playing, I think. for you going to? My again. It was for a show. My band was playing, I think. Your band is? It's Dick Neptune. Yes, yes. I wear suits. A lot of fun suits. Dick Neptune, yes, yes is the name. No, yeah.

That was the funniest thing you've said so far. You lost all the confidence in it. I know. I uh telling my buddies here i'm like dude fucking too short loose jay gomez i'm more a purple suit and bomb i just know it and i had that premonition yeah yeah you were correct you were wearing a purple shit i knew it but it feels good though you did that oh Oh, thank you. Thank you. Good issue, man. You made it all come true. Oaktown, man. My badass lesbian aunt lives in Oaktown.

I have fond memories of that place, man. That's her suit, isn't it? Yes. Wow. Robert, tell us something honest and real about you. Tell us something that scares you or that makes you. Oh, dude. Actually, I just found out I have pre-diabetes.

Because my, I have the palate of a fifth. Yeah. Fuck yeah. Bring that shit, man. Pre-diabetes. Yeah. Too many big gulps, dude. It's, yeah, I have the palate of a fifth grader.

So, I don't know. It's just taking a toll on me. Oh, my God. Yeah. How did they tell you? Was it like, what'd they do? Was it scary? They were like, you need to sit down.

Oh, yeah. Did they broke it down? Like, I thought it was going to be way worse, but yeah, it was. So why do you? Sir, first of all, you're going to need to take that suit off. We can't take you seriously. Yeah. Wow.

What did they prescribe to you? Oh, just to eat, not like a second grader, you know, take care of yourself, stuff. I drink way too much soda. I don't drink beer. It's like my vice, man. I don't know. I'm visiting Dr. Pepper too much. Who?

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So you have pre-diabetes. What else is going on? How's your love life? Oh, it's good. You getting laid wearing a suit like that? Oh, you know it, man.

You have a girlfriend? Yeah, yeah. How long you been with her? Two years, yeah. Do you think she's going to leave you because of the diabetes thing? Oh, dude. If I don't change, man, I don't know. I might be leaving her soon.

I might be wearing this to my funeral, you know? Fuck. So I didn't mean to bring it down. Jesus Christ, Robert. It's a realization I'm trying to live with. Oh, my God. Yeah. Can't you just go keto or something and reverse it?

I've heard that, actually. Yeah. No, we're saying go keto and reverse that jacket, please. It's disgusting. That thing is incredible. My God. All right, Robert. What scares you?

Oh, diabetes. High fashion. Other than diabetes. Bombing in a giant purple suit. Have you ever worn that suit to do comedy in before? In Brea, so it's okay. It's all right. Wow, Robert, you are completely out of touch tonight.

You are cracking yourself up, and you keep looking at them, and they're just staring right back at you. It's an amazing... He thought he was going to connect with the crowd on that one. He was like, in Brea, you know what I'm talking about? Just one chick, his girlfriend, fake laughing. Thank you.

Alright, Robert. Well, I mean, there's nothing that can change what happened here tonight. No. You live and you learn. Doc, what do you got? If you keep this up, you're going to disappear from human existence! Alright, well. Anything else for Robert, guys?

What do you think? Keep it moving? Robert Thompson, ladies and gentlemen. Rob T. Comedy 1. Let him know. Some people on YouTube, I bet they'll say that they love this suit. Let him know soon. Might not have much time.

Yes, it's pre-diabetes. Imagine how many sodas he's gonna have to drink tonight to calm the nerves. Great Scott! This looks like a new name put your hands together for Gerardo Alcaron. Wow he's got a he's got a pop from the open micers, from the comedians. This guy must be liked on the circuit. That's my guess.

He has a full table going crazy right now. Here he is. Gerardo Alcaron. Yeah. Hey, what's up? How's it going? What's up? How's it going? I'm, uh, what's up? How's it going? I'm Gerardo. I'm a French-Mexican.

Yeah, feast your eyes, yeah. Mexicans call me Gerardo. French people call me Gerardo. Saying I'm French-Mexican is like saying I'm an average thief. You know what I mean? Like, French people, they're great thieves. You know? You know?

But a Mexican dude's always speaking Spanish and saying what they're about to steal in English. You know what I mean? Mira, compa, vamos acá y chingarnos este pinche Dodge Charger, okay? Después entramos a la tienda y salimos con, como se dice, that old lady's purse right there. I need money, bro. I'm a pot smoker. You guys like smoking pot?

I had a job interview recently for Amazon. But when I got there, it felt like an orientation, you know, like a bunch of people looking at a PowerPoint. I was like, I got this shit. How's it going, guys? You can go ahead. You can finish it. Oh, yeah, I just, I felt like I got it, you know. I got really fucking confident. Took out my phone, took selfies and shit, like Amazon life,

you know. Like, this is what it's like and shit. But then this lady came out and was like, time for the drug test. I was like, fuck. Ah, yeah, that was long. Gerardo Alcaron. Alcaron. Alacon. Alacone. Alacone.

Alacone, yeah. Alacone. Fuck yeah, Gerardo. This is your first time on the show. First time on the show. Yeah. It's nerve-wracking. Sorry.

It's crazy. Why'd you step back so far? I don't know. I'm scared. What are you doing? That was kind of weird for me, bro. Yeah, I know. Maybe get away.

Gerardo, can you move up a little bit? We've got no bathroom or something. The fuck? Too close. Too close, my bad. Yeah, too short, too close. Gerardo, so you clearly just had a meltdown as a UPS driver today, signed up, stormed in here and said,

I'm French-Mexican and I'm going in to steal this fucking show. Hell yeah. And then you slowly migrated towards Joel Berg thinking he would protect you. No. Gerardo, how long have you been doing stand-up? Four years in December. Wow. All here in Los Angeles?

In the IE, Inland Empire. Oh, okay. There's a whole carpool of you guys here. Good fiat. I lived out here for like three years in Sherman Oaks. And what made you move back to the Inland Empire? Just I lived

in the house. What made the Empire strike back? I lived in a house with like 16 people. There was a lot of people in the house. In Sherman Oaks. Your family? No. Yeah. Your family? No. Yeah. And now who do you live with? My parents.

Look at me. I'm killing it. How old are you? I'm 27 years old. 27. You live with your parents. You've been doing stand-up for four years.

What do you do for a living? Right now I work for this thing called Blackstone Entertainment. I just do like grip work on set with lighting. Oh, cool. You've you do for a living? Right now I work for this thing called Blackstone Entertainment. I just do grip work on set with lighting. You've been doing that a while? For like three months. What did you do before that?

Before that, I did a lot of jobs. I was working at UPS recently. That's hilarious. Great Scott, have you been time traveling, Tony? When UPS hired you, were they like, what can this brown do for us? In the future, that joke is still racist. Did you get fired from UPS?

No, I quit when I got this Blackstone gig. Oh. Yeah. I got really excited. I quit. I had two jobs. I was working UPS and at the improv as a dishwasher. As a dishwasher?

Ontario improv. As a dishwasher. You're not going to say anything about how that's racist? Yeah. Nope. All right. So what else is your life like, Gerardo? What's it like living with a... Which one's French?

Which one's Mexican? French mom? My mom is French, yeah. My great-great-great-grandpa was French. Great-great-great-grandpa. He's a fucking Mexican. Yeah, you're clearly just a Mexican. Are you out of your fucking...

You can't claim French Mexican If your great great great grandfather was French Wow Yeah I'm African True Too short do you allow that I was interested in figuring it out After like

Let me see your haircut We got the same haircut I know one thing man figuring it out after like... Let me see your haircut. We got the same haircut. Here we go. We're gonna look like if you just adjusted your screen. When I was a struggling, starving rapper who had nothing, I had a fucking iron. Every comic up here tonight has fucking wrinkled ass clothes.

What the fuck, man? Absolutely right. I'm not even into fashion. And everybody's fucking like wrinkled as fuck. What the fuck? Yep. And this guy's got a Mexican mom in him. He probably has seven irons. He's not using any of them. It's absolutely true.

That's something I've noticed tonight as well. Even the guy with a felt suit, somehow it was wrinkled. It is incredible. It's something that I noticed. They're in every parent's house. They're in every hotel room across the country do you ever iron things no what is that what are you surprised it's not one of the many jobs you've had Gerardo I put the clothes in the dryer and then wear it afterwards okay what do you do for fun when you're not doing stand-up or living with your parents I get the

splits oh that trail yeah we have you can do splits. Is that true? You can do splits? Who would like to see Gerardo do some splits here tonight? Wow. Wow. That's incredible. Uh-oh. Wait a second. Jeremiah, no fucking way

No way, no way Wow Damn, damn, damn It's becoming one of my new favorite things that's been happening the last ever since Nashville we learned that anytime anybody can physically do anything that Jeremiah can do, that he'll just start to do it for no reason. Yeah. You know who he kind of looks like?

He kind of looks like the new Incredible Hulk, like halfway in turning, before turning into the Incredible Hulk. Oh, yeah. He looks Mark Ruffer than Ruffalo. Yes. Mark Ruffle. People call me Juan Belushi. They call you what? Yeah, you do a lot of open mics.

I do. I have way too many open mics. Right. Gerardo, what's your favorite thing about your life? His Juan Belushi joke. Yeah, exactly. Yeah. Favorite thing about your life? His Wambaloo-shee joke. Yeah, exactly, yeah. Favorite thing about my life?

I think I like playing music. I play a lot of music. Yeah, what do you play? Oh, yeah, I play a lot of things. Do you play any instruments, Gerardo? Just answer the questions honestly. Yeah, I do. Yes, what instruments do you play, Gerardo?

Well, I play guitar. I What instruments do you play, Gerardo? Well, I play guitar. I play bass. I play piano. Oh, God. Get on with it. Drums. You do play drums. Not as well, I think, as the Joel Berg himself.

But yeah, I do play drums. Would you be willing to give us a little sample of drumming? I'll try it. We do this thing on this show called a Mexican Drum Off. Joel Berg is Joel Berg is undefeated. Here he is trying to steal Joel Berg's spot

on the show. A drum solo from Gerardo. Yes, Joel Berg? I was going to say, I ain't getting naked for this one. Yes. Okay, go ahead, Gerardo. Give us a sample. Wow. All right. Defending his throne.

Defending his throne. All-time undefeated. Let's see if Joel Berg can top that. Joel Berg? Hold on, hold on, hold on. Wow. Jolberg. Jolberg with a drum solo. Well, Gerardo.

It's funny because that wasn't even that good and it was still better than his. That's fine. He was pretty good, though. Yeah, Gerardo, you got to be bad at like three things here tonight. It's incredible. Only three, really. Gerardo looks like he'd be a good-looking dude if he just got his shit together.

Like his hair stinks. He's a little fat. His skin kind of stinks. His clothes stink. But he could do a split. He looks like he'd probably fuck pretty good. I don't know. Gerardo, stop touching the people on stage.

He looks like royalty if you live in the Inland Empire, though. I just feel like he's trying to do his hair like a Frenchman. He's really leaning into this fucking French great-great-great-grandfather thing. He just needs some product. All right. Well, Gerardo, there you go. Thank you very much. There he goes. Gerardo Alacron. He's on Twitter

at Gelaldo. G-E-L-O-L-D-O. Tony, he looked like Aladdin if it was spelled A-L-A-T-I-N. I like it. Say it again. Say it again. He looks like Aladdin if it was spelled A-L-A-T-I-N.

There you go. Thank you. That is a good one. Wait a second. Aladdin. Say it again. All right. I pulled another name out of the bucket.

Let's see what happens. Put your hands together for Charlie Adams. Charlie Adams. I'm not seeing any movement here. Charlie Adams. Wait. Black listed. That's a shame.

Poor Charlie Adams. There was a guy last week who was stuck on the toilet when his name was called. And he was very, very sad and disappointed. After the show, he's like, you know, I was on the toilet. Dude, I've been having stomach issues for four weeks. Can I shake your hand? No. He goes, I've had serious stomach issues for four weeks. I'm like, can I shake your hand? No. He goes, I've had serious stomach issues for four weeks.

You think maybe I could just get a spot? I go, show business is tough, dude. Whoa, I pulled a name out of the bucket. I actually met this lady outside the back door. I specifically saw her and made a point to ask her if she signed up

for this show. I am excited to meet her. Put your hands together for the first time on this show for Valentine, everybody. Valentine. Wow. This is going to be great. I've never seen her before. She was sitting on the stool out back. Keep coming. You're doing a great job. She's only been in town for three days. She's from Las Vegas, Nevada. That's all I know about her. Let's all meet her together.

It's Valentine. Female Speaker 1st. Female Speaker 2nd. Female Speaker 1st. Female Speaker 2nd. Female Speaker 1st. Female Speaker 2nd. Female Speaker 2nd. Female Speaker 2nd. Female Speaker 2nd. All right. Woo! Okay, you ready? Ready? I haven't had sex since 86.

I haven't seen pricks or sucked on dicks. I'm glad I'm not young anymore. My nipples and buns have healed just fine. I haven't been groped since 89. I'm glad I'm not young anymore. I'm a born again virgin that's what I am

so why don't you zip up and scram put it on ice no faking it just to get it done pretending what's boring lots of fun.

I've won the Oscar for best leading whore. And I'm so glad that I'm not young anymore. Dance segment. Wow. Valentine. more. Dance segment. Wow. Valentine. Hell yeah. That is so exciting.

Wow. That is awesome. Sorry, Tony. We brought her back in the trunk of the DeLorean. Tony, we might have to hook up my boner to the clock tower. Valentine, you are one hot little old lady, aren't you? Look at you. Yeah, yeah. At least I'm waiting to be hot. Oh, my God!

Was that a cremation joke you just made? Waiting to be hot? Yes. Wow. That's probably the next time I'm going to get any ash. Hey! Woo! I like your fucking style lady yeah thank you for being a friend down down down down hell yeah Yeah. Marry me! Marry me! You are one hot little old lady. Her and Doc are flirting with each other over there.

Valentine, so I met you... I'd like to put it in your Doc Brown. I'm sorry! It just shot out of me! Valentine, so I literally... That's a true story. I'm sorry. It just shot out of me. Valentine. So I literally, that's a true story. I met you at the back door, asked you if you'd signed up. You're from Vegas. You've been here a few days.

I didn't ask you how long are you in town for? Three more days. Three more days. What are you doing here? What am I doing? Other than doing comedy. I wanted to be in the capital of comedy. I've been to New York.

I lived there for a long time. I did the open mics in New York. I did the open mics in Vegas. And I know this is the place. Am I right? Yes. I can't believe I got picked. I know a lot of bitches this bitch is not fooling me

she is far from rusty did you see how she grabbed the mic when she first came out I was watching like okay I love that comedy is timeless I love that she was like you know nostalgic and the shit was funny but I was like this bitch is a slut

I've seen her a mile away I'm just saying I've seen her hips wiggle she's a she's an expert oh for sure can we come you can confirm this right the doc knows what I'm talking about. He's damn right too short.

Valentine, can you confirm this? You've been around the block a couple times with some guys. You know how to to you look like a you look like, you know what I mean. You more of a blanch. Well, if I can remember because it's been since 1986. Really? 1986?

Wait, since the last time you had sex? It's military time. Oh my god Shortberg But somebody is stalking me So there is hope Is that true? Who's stalking you? The Grim Reaper?

Is that true? Who's stalking you, the Grim Reaper? Hey, I had everything lifted, you know? Wow, you are adorable. So Las Vegas, you ever think about doing like America's Got Talent or something? I think you would destroy. They wouldn't even know what to do with you. They'd give you that fucking little bumper.

Oh, we've had it before. We've had people on this show that we told would kill on that show and they got straight the pass. Jeremiah? Preacher Lawson. Preacher Lawson. He was like in the top three or five or something like that. Yeah, that guy does theaters now.

Yeah. And he has a full-blown career. Valentine, you ever think about doing anything like that? What are you thinking? I did. I went on auditions for America's Got Talent. You did? Yeah. What happened? You waited out in the heat and passed out?

I was too... I was a little too smutty for them. Really? Is that true? I see that you have an entire bag there. What else is in that bag? Can you show us any of your... Her memories.

This used to be me. I have a song about it. I lost 100 pounds. Is that really true? Can I see? Can I smell? Oh, come on, you guys. Red band.

Is that really true? You lost all that weight? Pull those out again. That's why I had to get everything lifted. You know, 100 pounds kind of falls. Valentine, you mind telling us how old you are? You like all the other female comedians, and you're going to lie to me. What's that? Do I like...

What's your age? 67. 67. Look at that. Look at that. Bright, bubbly energy. Look at that. Bright, bubbly energy. Six or seven.

What do you think about that, Doc Brown? Two more years to the golden age. Valentine, what's the craziest thing you've ever done sexually? Do I have to say it? Yeah. Okay. I was cheating on my husband because he was cheating on me. I figure, you know, that's even, right?

Two wrongs don't make a right. Yeah. Hold on. Go ahead, Valentine. So I went out with my boyfriend, and then I went back home to pretend I'd been there, and I waited for my husband to go to sleep, and then I met my boyfriend again. Wow. That's it?

Look at you. I thought you were going to make your husband eat your boyfriend's jizz out of your pussy. Yeah, that's what I... I honest to God thought that's where this was going to. That was pathetic. That's the craziest thing you've done. I've done crazier things sexually today. That's all I have. I'm a Catholic girl school.

Me and Tushar are going to double jean this lady tonight. Hell yeah. Is that your real name, Valentine? You're so cute. You have little hearts all over you. Is that a real name Valentine you're so cute you have little hearts all over you is that a real tattoo man you are so cool Valentine that's amazing

so you're in town for six more days any other crazy plans while you're here just do every open mic I can you are adorable I love your spirit this is a good example for a lot of the younger people to see. Look how good of an interview that was. Just being honest with the questions, smiling and having fun.

There she goes. Valentine, everybody. What a great show. So many shapes and sizes of people happening here. Come on, it's her last comedy show ever. Valentine, everybody. Put your hands together for her. comedy show ever. Valentine, everybody. Put your hands together for her. There she goes.

Be careful. If she sees the light, she's going to start walking towards it. All right, we're having fun. I pulled another name out of the bucket. Put your hands together for Antonio Montello. Here we go. Again, from're having fun. I pulled another name out of the bucket. Put your hands together for Antonio Montello. Here we go. Again, from the deepest corner. We got a yellow hat coming at us. Alright. It's a long walk. Hell yeah. One more time for Antonio Montello.

Dan, what's up, you guys? Hello. You guys all look like really good people. Man, and I like to talk to good people. Especially good people that can keep a good conversation about me. Anyway, oh, fuck that. Okay. I just got real nervous. I'm a big fan of Too Short.

I just kept putting the songs on repeat in my head, but whatever. I'm 23 years old, you guys. I got married when I was 19 years old, and I'm really excited because me and my wife just got all settled into my mom's house. And like, living with my mom and my wife

is like living with lesbian parents. But they're both Mexican, so I can never tell which one's yelling at me. They're like, Antonio, take out the trash. Antonio, come do the dishes. Antonio, come eat this pussy. There you go, Antonio Montello. You've been on this show before right Remind me of what happened last time Last time I was on it

It was in the belly room and I bombed Well you did that again For the first 30 seconds here tonight Then somehow you pulled out of a tailspin Towards the end Yeah I just breathed Yeah that helps. Breathing's a pretty important thing.

Is that true? You lived with your wife and your mom? Yes. Under one roof. How long has that been going on for? Maybe like a year and a half now. We lived in Santa Monica before. No, Sherman Oaks too.

So your mom moved from Santa Monica to Sherman Oaks? No, no, no. Me and my wife lived in Santa Monica, and then we lived in Sherman Oaks. And then I wanted to move in with my mom. It's more comfortable. You did not want to move in with your mom. What the fuck? You skipped a bunch in that story, okay?

The part about you losing your job, not having any future, career. Your wife screaming at you a bunch. Why did we get married, Antonio? What are you doing to me? You didn't promise me this life, Antonio. His mother has the best pussy. It's clear. No, he knows what's up.

Mom's got the best pussy. I heard it. Read between the lines. What's your mother's name? You're 23? What's her name? Her name's Courtney. Courtney from where?

Chicago. I know that bitch. Guess what? Your mom is Blowjob Betty. So, Antonio, does your mom ever bring any dudes home? No. Never? No. Never?

No. Why do you think that is? I mean, I don't know. That's my mom. I don't know. Yeah, but don't you want her to have fun, too? You saw Valentine up here. She's getting plenty of cock.

I think she just stays out because she thinks it's weird. She stays out? I think, like, if she wants to get some, she'll go somewhere else. You don't ever talk with her about it? Nah. You don't ever say, Mom, you ever get laid? Nah. Do you and your wife have sex? Actually, I sort of got asked her last week, and she just said, Antonio, shut the fuck up.

Right. Well, she probably thought you were about to run jokes by her or something like that. Nah. So, Antonio, do you and your wife have sex when your mom is home? I mean, usually not, but yeah.

Usually not, but yeah. How is your sex life? Is it good? How long have you been married for? I've been married for four years. I got married when I was 19. I'm 23. Four years. Don't applaud that. That's not good. People just clapping. Very unhappy people in the crowd.

And my sex life's really good. The fuck was the music for? How often do you have sex? Probably every day. Every day? Yeah. Every day. Is that your wife over there?

No. No. Because she acted like she was getting the dick. She's like, hell yeah, he does. Hell yeah, he does. Get that pussy, Antonio. Oh, shit. And your mom never hears anything?

Are you quiet in the bedroom? Just tell the truth, Antonio. His mom is deaf, Tony. She usually has the TV pretty loud. Yeah, what does she watch? Other comedians. Antonio, so far you've had trouble with every question I've asked. My mom is re-watching ER right now.

ER. So she's into doctors. Yeah, she's a nurse. She's a nurse? Yeah. At like a hospital or something like that? She's a home health nurse, so she goes to people's houses. Oh.

So people that aren't able to get to hospitals and stuff. I wonder how many houses she goes to where the kids all live with the moms still. How old are you? I'm 23. I've said it three times. Oh, shit, Tony. Pay attention, bitch. Oh, wow. Wow.

Wow. God. Jeez, this is really going to bother me when I get back to my mom's house and have to go to bed tonight. You fucking little pussy. Mom-living-ass motherfucker. Yeah, you're going to bed tonight. You fucking little pussy. Mom living ass motherfucker. Yeah, you're going to repeat yourself.

How old are you? Son of a bitch. Why would you get married at 19? What was going through your head where you're like, dude, this is fucking, this is it? Well, I just loved her a lot, and she's from Mexico, and I didn't want her to leave. I wanted to stay with her, and I love her.

So I was like, fuck it, and I bought a ring and married her. Wow. Oh, yeah. I hope she's fucking another guy right now. I hope she's getting double teamed by two other dudes. She's just sitting in the corner fingering herself like a cuck. Yeah. How old are you again?

Hey, 23. I already told you. You asked me three times. Tony, what the heck? Wow. This guy. You got her a ring, huh? You got the Mexican girl a ring.

Is there ice on that ring? There is. You better hope there's not ice at your mom's house or she's probably getting deported. She's a U.S. citizen now? Yeah. How does that make you feel? Good? Sure, yeah.

That's a lot of power. Yeah, I got jokes about it, I guess. She can do anything now. Yeah. She could leave it for someone guess. She can do anything now. Yeah. She could leave it for someone that doesn't live with their mother. Yeah, if she wanted to, she could. Yeah, if she wanted to, she could. What does she do for work?

She's a nanny. She's a nanny. Yeah. That's what she tells you. Awkward. Are you guys about to stare each other down and have sex? What's happening right now? Are you talking to me?

No, he's 23. Not even looking at it. All right, Antonio. Well, anything else? Any other redeeming qualities about you? Is there anything good about you? Yeah. Like what? I don't know. I have a big heart.

What's the nicest thing you've ever done? Married that Mexican immigrant. Gave her a home in this country You know Man I don't know I just do nice Try to do nice things daily Even if I don't have a lot of money

I'll try I'll get like what I have left I hate you so fucking much I don't give a fuck I don't like how all the girls hearts are melting in here right now Fuck all you two Anybody who's going, he's a phony. This guy's

a date rapist? There's going to be 25 me two stories. Anybody who's like, do I have a big heart? That guy rapes. That's right. He's right. That's just a fact. There he goes. Rapist. Antonio Montello, everybody.

23 year old. 25 he goes. Rapist. Antonio Montello, everybody. 23-year-old. 24. 25-year-old. He's not a rapist. Just to clarify, he's not a rapist. Tony Hinchcliffe is a professional comedian making a roast joke right now. Yes, he's definitely not a rapist.

He has a big heart, you idiot. Too Short made a great point. There is a redeeming quality about him. He is the only comedian that ironed his shirt before coming out tonight. There he goes. Antonio Montello, everybody. Not a rapist. He's on Twitter at the only...

We don't know that he's not a rapist. We're trying to stay... It's not guaranteed that he's not a rapist. We are keeping our stream going live on YouTube, and he's not a rapist. We're trying to stay. It's not guaranteed that he's not a rapist. We are keeping our stream going live on YouTube, and he's not a rapist. You don't know that. He kind of did admit that he ate his mother's pussy. He did. I heard that.

And did she say yes? We don't know if she had given consent to that, Tony. So God bless Antonio, and I hope he's not out there hurting more women. One of the cool things on this show, we're going to take a break from the bucket for just one second because one of the cool things on this show is we have a regular on it. This young man writes and performs a brand new minute every single week to put out there in front of everyone,

and then we talk to him about his week. He's everybody's favorite young top rising comedian. Make some noise for the great and powerful Malcolm Hatchet. Yes. What's up, y'all? I used to work at McDonald's and I sold drugs. I was dedicated to both jobs. But sometimes working at McDonald's, I still thought I I sold drugs. I was dedicated to both jobs.

But sometimes, working at McDonald's, I still thought I was selling drugs. Like, I'd be at McDonald's, and a dude come in. Hey, man, let me get a quarter pounder. Shh, you can't be saying that shit out loud. My boss right there, now get some chicken nuggets. I mean, one time, this dude showed me all my money He bought a sweet tea, tea was a dollar and seven He put a dollar on the counter and I said give me my money

Wait that's a spatula Give me my money I hate whenever I go to girls homes and shit They be all over me Why you on me? Cause I'm cold Go get a blanket I wanna be on you Girl I'm 90 on me? Because I'm cold. Go get a blanket. I want to be on you.

Girl, I'm 90 pounds. My back hurt. I got scoliosis. But I care about you. Care about your thermostat, bitch. It's cold in here. You really have Malcolm Hatchett, ladies and gentlemen. Hell yeah.

You really have scoliosis? I was gonna say InfiniteCBD.com Tony15 You could save 15% from anywhere around the country Right now you can still order it I just got a little bag Put it on your feet Bitch

Malcolm that was another hilarious brand new minute Is that true you worked at McDonald's? Hell yeah. That was my first job out of high school. Damn. You were what, 16? No, no, no. Out of high school?

22. I was 19. I was 19. I was 19. You actually got a new job this week, right? You just started today. Yeah, I just started today. What's that job?

Working with the Miskins. It's a recycling job this week, right? Like, you just started today. Yeah, I just started today, yeah. What's that job? Working with the Miskins. Oh, it's a recycling job. It's straight. I'm just standing on a conveyor belt and just throwing shit. It's easy as fuck. The dudes be breaking the belt on purpose, so we ain't doing shit, so I'll be chilling. Damn. I think I found a job.

Wow. I gotta say, Tony, I think I've done this show three times when Malcolm's performed and literally every time fucking smashes it with really funny material. You're just really likable too, man. You know what I'm saying? I'm rooting for you. I want you to win.

Even when you're saying you're not working and you're fucking wasting my money, my tax dollars, when you're fucking breaking the recycling machines, I'm like, you know what? Good for him, man. You can tell he's a good dude. He actually has a good heart. This guy does not rape. wasting my money, my tax dollars, where you're fucking breaking the recycling machines. Mike, you know what? Good for him, man. Hell yeah. You can tell he's a good dude. He actually has a good heart. This guy does not rape.

Malcolm, yes. Does not rape. Too short. Just to let you know the cool story, Malcolm came on this show. We've always had regulars. We've been doing this show for over five years, and we've always had a female regular.

It always was, in order to counteract the balance, so many men, more men doing it than women. We've had a lot of great female comedians, Kim Congdon, Sarah Weinshank, Vanessa Johnston, Allie Makovsky, they've all gone on and have great budding careers. And when our last one, Allie Makovsky, went away, we went months without a regular, and Malcolm came on, crushed it like three out of four weeks in a row. We made him a regular. He was sleeping

in his car. Still is. Yep. And over months here. Were you still sleeping in your car? Yeah, I took a plant-infested shower before I came here. Yeah, I still be in the car. They don't even have towels. I got towels.

He had to dry off with a pizza box. That's fucked up. With my drawers. And it's awesome. Now he's working all the time. He chooses to still stay in his car. He has a buddy that also sleeps in his car. And he's got a cool, fun-budding career.

Malcolm Hatchet. Too short, you have any advice or anything for Malcolm? Where you from, man? North Carolina. You know what I say, right? Huh? You know what I say? What?

Get your mother fucking money, man. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Fuck that shit they talking about, nigga. Yeah. You know what I mean? That's the real nigga. Hell yeah. What language are they speaking? Look, look.

Hey, look. Hey, look. Even though they don't know what we saying, I fuck with you. I fuck with you, too. Hell yeah. I'll tell y'all what I said later. Wow. That was incredible.

They just spoke African American to one another. That was nigga American. I think I've cracked the language. Let me give it a shot. Is it mine? It's on there. Yeah. Did I get it?

Did I get it? Ah, back to the drawing board. Damn. I asked him where he was from, and I said, no matter what you're doing, homie, get your money always. That's what I said. Well, why didn't you just say that? That's a good, valuable lesson for all the big-hearted people in here.

I like you too, shorty. I said, you know, you got it? My mind is blown, and I'm a physics scientist! Hilarious. Malcolm, anything else crazy happen in life this week? Anything you've seen? Got a new job? Oh, I did a self-tape for a movie like a week ago.

It was straight. How High 2, I did a self-tape. How High 2. Wow. Can you imagine that? Our little baby boy, Malcolm Hatchett, perhaps being in How High 2. Make it or not, it was just cool to do it. It was straight.

Of course, exactly. That's what's fun. Did you do it by yourself? Did you have a buddy tape it for you? I did it with my manager, and I did it also with a comic who's a real funny girl. She made me the character, so it was dope. That's great. Heck yeah.

Well, there you go. Malcolm Hatchett doing it again every single week on this show. He'll be at Kill Tony Mania on October 12th in San Francisco. How's that for a little fun fact? Back to the bucket we go.

You guys having fun out there? This guy's looking at his watch over here. This little fucking Law and Order guy. Pulled a name out of the bucket. Put your hands together for Christian Pierce. Christian Pierce. Here he comes.

Ladies and gentlemen, Christian Pierce. Being single in L.A. is tough. Even for me. I haven't hooked up with a chick in months. I mean, I would go back. It's just stressing me out being an adult, you know? I would go back to being a kid, back when I didn't have to worry about dumb adult stuff. You see, back when I was a kid, I was just always getting my dick touched.

Kind of a big change in mood. As you can tell by my face, my dad is 100% white, but my mom is 50% Native American, which makes me 25% drunk right now. Get him. The Oedipus Complex, I just learned what that is. It's one of Sigmund Freud's theories. Do you know what that is? Do you want to finish it?

No. Wow, look at that. No. Uh-oh. At least he has the wherewithal to know it wasn't going well. Christian, all right, that was fun. You always look like that? Yeah. Wow.

You look like you're about to turn into a gay superhero or something. He looks like that part on Deadpool where he's growing back his legs. Gay superhero, Pooperman? Pooperman? Did you say Pooperman? Poop Man.

Okay. Alright. So, Christian, you've been on this show once before, right? Twice, yeah. Twice. Did those go good for you? They went alright.

Yeah? It didn't change your life? No. What do you do? I am an actor. Yeah? What have you been in? Anything that we would recognize you from?

Fuck no. The Yellow Ranger or something like that? Mask on. Uh-huh. How long have you been acting for? About two years. Ian, you're not in anything that we could recognize you from? Probably not, no.

Have you ever pulled a butt shake? Yeah, of course I have. Look at me. Right away, I didn't like this guy whenever he stepped on stage, and still I don't like him. He said, of course I have. Look at me.

I've been in short films. I was just in a feature length. It's not like a big fucking movie. It's just like a movie. They do it, they sell it, they try to. God, I've always wondered what it would be like if Anthony Juzlemek's ball sack

did comedy, and I'm pretty sure we're finding out right now. Christian, the only thing I think I've seen you in is a Charlottesville rally video. He's a rapist, you're a racist. We're all having fun here. You know what?

I'm going to blame you for my pooper man bombing joke. That was really your fault. I think it would have worked with anybody else. We have a clip from one of his movies right here. Okay. It's a porno. Brian, alright. Wait a second.

So Christian, we've all unanimously agreed that you seem unlikable. Can you change our minds? What's something that'll make us like you? Is there anything nice that you do? What do you do? Honestly ever, what do you do? Honestly, you look like you go

puppy hunting. How would you describe the size of your heart? It's not giant. Not that big. Alright, good. Thank God. Likeable thing? Hmm. What is your most likable quality?

That's a great question because he's having a tough time with it. Yeah, what is it? Come on. Fuck. I can't think of anything. My positivity with my friends. Hey, let's try another thing. What tribe is your mother's family from?

She's Navajo. She's Navajo. Two shorts. Damn it, damn it. I love it. Everybody's mom's a hoe tonight. What the fuck? It's like fucking hoe mom night. I love it.

I wish every night was hoe mom night here in Kill Tony. Christian, try again. Let's try to think. What's the nicest thing you think you've ever done for anyone ever in your fucking life? Yeah. I started about a year ago.

I started making like short videos, just dumb. And that kind of made my friends also want to start creating shit for themselves. He's not saying shit. You started a YouTube channel and that's the nicest thing you've ever done for humanity? I've been helping people. He inspired a generation.

You inspired your friends. You're saying that the nicest thing you've ever done. That's the only thing I can think of. I've created like three or four YouTube personalities. Okay. Christian, let's try again. Nicest thing you've ever done for anyone ever in your life.

Ever. Ever. Anyone fucking ever. Listen to the question. Look at me for a second. Ever, dude. Ever. For anyone ever. Anything nice fucking ever. This guy sees

a family of ducks crossing the street and literally speeds up. Just fucking. I mean, I've volunteered. You've never volunteered, you liar. You're a liar. You're a fucking liar. What did you volunteer for, liar? I volunteered to be the captain of my yacht club team.

When they asked who wanted to be captain. I volunteered to get a handjob from Sarah Johnson in the eighth grade. No, fuck comedy. You need to learn how to lie, bro. How to lie. Yeah, right? I'm a fucking actor. I can't lie.

That's crazy. Oh, my God. What did you volunteer for? It was just a can sorting drive type thing. I'm being dead serious. A can sorting drive type of thing. Can sorting? Did you find any plutonium? That was in high school

and then in college. Where'd you go to college? Everyone loved me even more yeah they were both mandatory they weren't just like it's not volunteering that's not calling mandatory thing volunteering Wow wait a definition you know it was actually you know public service wait a Biff, is that you? Wow. You look like you've been told a bunch of times,

take your damn hands off her. Christian, let's figure out how you got this way. Your parents have a lot of money. They're successful. Your dad's like a surgeon or a lawyer or something like that. He looks like Val Kilmer's pre-cum. I like that one. I'm sorry. This is the beautiful thing about comedy.

He's so good looking and has it all. And then it's like, we just fucking tear into him. Like, fuck you, dude. For one night, you don't get to be cool. I love it. He just doesn't look like he's built for stand-up. He looks like he's the neighborhood watch of a cul-de-sac or something like that. No, my dad does pest control.

He owns his own pest control business. Pest control? Are you scared he'll take care of you one day? Really? That was the first truth he told all night. The first one. That's the first thing he told the truth all night. Oh, my God.

How about your mom? What does she do? She stays at home. I mean, she's a photographer. There you go. He's lying again. Stop lying, man's a photographer. There you go, lying again. He's lying again. Stop lying, man. Stop lying.

Why would I lie about my mom? Why wouldn't you lie about your mom? So a pest control guy married a photographer who really stays home, and they had you. Yeah, she was a photographer. Fucking lying, man. She wasn't a photographer her whole life. She's not really a photographer. They're rich. She just takes pictures. She's not really a photographer. They're rich.

She just takes pictures. She's like, look at me. He's telling us those bar stories that he tells little bitches at the bar. She just has an iPhone 7. Christian, do you break a lot of girls' hearts? Are you into that? You seem cold as ice. I'm not.

I have a girlfriend. You have a girlfriend? How long have you two been together? Two years. Yeah? Where'd you meet her? The lacrosse field? I think we met at a party.

This bro's habitual, man. He'd be terrible at like a lineup or like a fucking police inquiry. You're terrible, bro. You're terrible. You gotta work on that shit. Fuck the comedy. Work on your lies. When people ask you how it went tonight, you tell them Too Short told you

you're terrible. Okay? There he goes. Christian Pierce. What do you think? Should we go to the bucket one more time? Alright. Let's do one last one. I just feel bad for whatever hooker he's going to order later on and beat up.

Give him a chance. He's got a big heart. Volunteer. Mandatory volunteer. We know this young lady. She's been on the show a few times. Put your hands together for Joy Eileen everyone Joy Eileen

Hi So last week I found out That I was going to be an aunt to twins. Today I found out that the babies didn't have heartbeats. Yeah, and I heard somebody told me, like, the term for miscarried babies is angel babies. I call them quitters. Angel babies. They don't deserve that name.

That's like giving them a participation trophy. They didn't participate. Like they didn't participate. Like, they didn't even get to the hard part. They didn't get to life. Like, life is hard. They are the closest to a fish that a human will ever be. Like, they're in water, and they get to do this. Sorry, fucking quitters.

There you go, Joy Eileen. Yikes. Is that true? It is true. Wow. Today you found out? No, I found out last week, but... Is it worth giving up your relationship with your family for that minute?

Yes. Yes. My God. Did you make those jokes in front of them yet? No. No, I did my mom, yes. And she laughed. Tough womb.

Tough womb. Double, so one could call that a double miscarriage. Yes. Wow. Yeah. And who did this happen to again? My brother's girlfriend. Your brother's girlfriend. Oh, it's not real family. But they were going to again? My brother's girlfriend. Your brother's girlfriend.

Oh, it's not real family. But they were going to be mine. They were my baby. Are the babies still in there? No, no. You said they just had a, you didn't hear the heartbeat. They had a DNC on Monday, so. What does that stand for?

It's a DNC. It's the Democratic National Convention. That's exactly it. Man, these people are looking for any candidate. Hillary couldn't do it get two dead babies nobody can vote against two dead babies it's brilliant

Trump could never beat two dead babies four more years two more babies wow my goodness what does your brother do for work Wow. Good, man. Which one? The neck one or the... My goodness. What does your brother do for work? He is a security guard at a casino.

Wow, it's a shame he couldn't protect his babies. You know what I'm saying? Oh, shit. How about the mom? What does she do? She's a nurse. Oh, really? Oh, Jesus.

Wow. Too bad she couldn't nurse her babies. Nurse them back to life. Wow. My goodness. You're going to have a lot of problems with this material in the future if you try to do this again. I know.

Do you ever invite your brother? You should invite them out. Perhaps do a show in the belly room sometime. I lost that show. Oh my god. Well, they say laughter is the best medicine. But anyway.

So a DNC. Explain to me what that is. It's basically they go in and clean it out. And that is the scientific term. Turn them into angel dust. You know what I'm saying? Angel babies. That's incredible.

Is that true? They call them angel babies? Yeah. When I wrote the joke, I thought it was rainbow babies. But John was like, no, it's angel babies. So I changed it. Now let me ask John was like, no, it's angel babies, so I changed it. Now let me ask you something. Let's be honest here.

All right. You know, there's nobody watching or anything. Oh, we have your dead baby. Oh, man, they're calling in from heaven right now. Can I just say I do not support what is happening right this second. Doc Brown, will you please stop throwing us under the bus? My God, you are a cast member

on the show, sir. I love it. Hell yeah. So, let's be honest here, right? You've never really liked your brother's girlfriend to begin with. Do you think she did anything? Like maybe drank a Red Bull?

She drank a Red Bull. She drank a Red Bull, You know? She drank a Red Bull. Sat in the steam room. She drank a Red Bull. Gave those angel babies its wings. Did you do it? No, no. I wanted them. Because we're done having kids.

So this was my way of having babies again. Oh, did they let you keep the jar? They did, yeah. Wait, is that true? No, no, no. All right. Great. I was just trying to play.

What did you guys do to those babies? Wow. I was just trying to play. What did you guys do to those babies? Wow. It was her? My goodness. Joy, anything else interesting happening in life? I'm working on the fourth Jet Calls book, so that's going to be coming out soon.

That's right. Joy Eileen is a writer. Yes. If you like that material, there's more. Yeah, trickling down her sister-in-law's leg. Fuck off! No, no. Oh my God. And then I just started a podcast.

Are your brother and his girlfriend married? no so one could call her a miss carriage alright anyway not a missus carriage alright forget it I think we're I would call it beating a dead horse but it's two babies so I can't really call it that

if it was funny I would have ended up laughing in the fetal position horse, but it's two babies, so I can't really call it that. If it was funny, I would have ended up laughing in the fetal position. Those babies are like a pair of shoes, because they have two souls as well. Does that make sense? Alright, we're done. We ended on a roll. Let's move on. Sorry, Doc.

I got a few more I got to get through here. It's very rare that we have a double miscarriage. And when in Rome, you know, take the miscarriage. I've seen the future, damn it. Don't do it. What can happen? We're on YouTube. The babies are in a tube, too, for those of you paying attention.

They're also streaming right now. They're also being uploaded. To the cloud? That's so messed up. Joy is a professional writer. She has a series of books. She does stand-up comedy as well, but she's literally a professional writer. She has a series of books. She does stand-up comedy as well,

but she's literally a professional writer. Do you have a pen name or something like that? I just Joy Eileen. Joy Eileen. I knew all that shit already. I was like, what is Jack Holes? The Jack Holes is a fictitious band. So I write rock and roll romance,

so you go with the rock and roll. Awesome. I once knew a pimp named Jack. Did you? Was he an asshole? He had a lot of hoes. I was just wondering where you're affiliated. Yeah.

Where you wanted Jack's hoes. I didn't know. I didn't know Jack hoes. That sounds crazy. All right. Joy, you did it again. That was an interesting minute. I'm glad that you're writing about what's happening to you.

It's a pretty depressing topic, but we were able to get through it all together. And there you go. Joy Eileen, ladies and gentlemen. You know, something just... I'm going to be honest with you, and maybe I'm crazy, but something just doesn't feel right about ending it on two dead babies. Should we get one more person up here?

All right, let's go one last time. We're going to make it quick. Quick interview. Oh, my God, it's the two dead babies! They're hilarious! Put your hands together for Steve Torelli. Steve Torelli? Steve Torelli. I don't see anyone coming.

Is that Steve Torelli? Here you go. Here he comes. The band is playing like professionals, and here comes Steve Torelli. Here he comes, everybody. Steve Torelli. Steve Torelli, your final comedian of the night.

Come on. I don't know who my real parents are. It's true. I was adopted. So I was born in South America, in Colombia. If you don't know about that country, that exports mainly three things. Cocaine, coffee, orphans.

You're looking at one of them. It's like, my parents are white, but I'm sure they probably wanted a white baby, but the waiting list is way too long, guys. Celebrities can't even get white babies. They gotta get them from Africa. You know, Brad Pitt. But yeah, so I do stand-up comedy. Do better than I thought. I do stand-up comedy. Do better than I thought.

I do stand-up comedy and I'm adopted so I'm disappointing two sets of parents. Imagine the birth parents find me. They're like yeah, call us when you learn how to sing. Yeah, that orphan Annie, she sings. Does a lot better than you. That's it. Alright, well well there you go

we went from talking about two dead babies to this orphan clearly we all recognize from the evolutionary chart you have an incredible look to you Steve what are you I'm Colombian

you look like a caveman's attorney Tony this guy's the Geico guy Who are you? I'm Colombian. You look like a caveman's attorney. Tony. Geico. It's the Geico guy. Tony, this guy's the cover of Mad Magazine in Colombia. Right. Okay.

Wow. Actually, he kind of looks like Joel Berger Little, right? He looks like him and his twin were aborted 30 years ago, but he survived and climbed out of the sewers. Right. Steve. Could happen. I don't know. How long you done stand-up comedy for?

It'll be four years real soon. About four years now. Four years real soon. Yeah. All right. How do you survive? I work in a retirement home. You do?

In the cafeteria. Yeah, I serve food. You serve food? Uh-huh. That seems depressing. How long... Thank you, Louis J. Gomez. Way to contribute to the interview.

That seems depressing. It does. It really fucking does. I mean, you seem like you probably have a lot of sadness inside of you because of what you have to deal with day in, day out. Oh, definitely. Yeah. What's the best thing on the menu?

Best thing on the menu? Oh, they got good food on there. They got like chicken marsalas good. They got enchiladas, all kinds of stuff. Really? Valentine, what's your favorite thing that you eat? Remember Valentine from earlier?

The good old days. Steve, I'm going to be honest with you. I'm interested to find out, you ever flirt with any of the ladies at the retirement home? No, not really. Not really? No. What does that mean? You ever put a little something in the meatloaf?

You know what I mean? Well, they're really old, so their time's running out, so they'll flirt with me mainly. Like, if they see a guy they like, they'll flirt with them. Is that true? Yeah. You ever show them a little? Give, like, the head of your dick or anything like that? No, never.

Why not? No. What's the kinkiest thing you ever did working as a lunch lady in a retirement home? It's like, put your dick through the bottom of a Jell-O cup. Like, here you go. No, nothing kinky happens at work. You want some of this warm milk? Can I change your diaper?

Man. So how long have you been doing that for? I've been doing that job for seven years. Seven years serving food to elderly people. Yeah. Wow. Steve. God damn.

Do you ever get sad when they die? Yeah. I do miss them. Now that was depressing. Who was the person you were most attached to? Tell us about that experience. Yeah, tell us about that person. Well, some guys will like...

One guy really liked college football, and that's one of my favorite sports. So whenever I see... What was his name? His name? Yeah. Titus. Remember the Titus.

Yeah, we miss you. And Titus loved college football and every, what, Saturday you would do what? I would just remember him. You know, he's from your home state. He loves Ohio State football. It's his favorite team.

So, yeah. Looks like one more season ticket just opened up this year. State. He loves Ohio State football. It's his favorite team. Is that true? Wow. Looks like one more season ticket just opened up this year. Hell yeah. Remembering Titus behind that music was the funniest thing I've ever seen. Yo, bro. Too short. This is LA.

What's up? This is Los Angeles. Yeah. You probably could make a lot more money with your cocaine connections. Yeah. Too short with some good advice. Go back to your Colombian roots. Yeah. Go back to the family business.

Cut the bullshit, bro. Yeah. Go back to it. Cocaine. You could make a lot more money. You could be sliding cocaine to some of those retirement people. Oh, yeah. Right between the buns.

Hey, the sloppy Joe's thick tonight, Ethel. All right, let's get out of here. That's Steve Torelli. He's on Twitter. It's Torelli. Guys, we did it. Luis J. Gomez and Too Short. Make some fucking noise.

Look at this amazing drawing from Ryan J. Lewis J. Gomez and Too Short. Make some fucking noise. Look at this amazing drawing from Ryan J. Ebelt. You got Too Short driving the car. Lewis J. J-Walking. See that? Lewis J. Walking. Make sure you check out Blow the Whistle, the podcast from Too Short, Legion of Skanks,

Lewis J. Gomez on Gas Digital Network, and check out Ellis Mania this Saturday, August 25th, live from Las Vegas, Legion of Skanks, Louis J. Gomez on Gas Digital Network. And check out Ellis Mania this Saturday, August 25th, live from Las Vegas, Nevada. We're going to be in Lansing, Grand Rapids, Detroit, Toronto, San Francisco. That Kill Tony Mania is huge. The exclusive Live Nation pre-sale code is remixed this Wednesday. You'll get them first.

Boston, Providence, San Antonio, Austin, Houston, Fort Worth. You're all getting Kill Tonys and stand-up shows. Next week, it's the H3 podcast. Ethan and Hila Klein, that's going to be epic. And how about you make some noise for the great and powerful Jeremiah Watkins, everybody. Doc Brown. He has an unbelievable podcast called Jeremiah Wonders. Go ahead.

Sunday, August 26th, Phoenix, Phoenix, Phoenix, Arizona. Myself, Joel Berg, and Pat Reagan are going down there to headline, so come on out to Phoenix Valley Bar this Sunday, August 26th, and listen to Jeremiah Wonders. Thank you! Make some noise for Joel Berg! Joel Jimenez!

The backbone. Joel Berg's on social media mostly sorry anything else Joelberg my mom and brother are here special shout out to the mom the brother the Jimenez are here should be very proud of this little boy

Momberg Momberg Momberg yes indeedy. Life is good. We did it again. That's another episode of Kill Tony. Thanks to Josh Martin, Ryan J. E. Belt. Those prints are ryanjebelt.com, including the poster.

Yeah, and if you want the Kill Tony shirt, it's available in the lobby right now. Heck yeah. Live audience, thank you so much. Have a great night everyone 35,000. I was going to say, it's very expensive. So, we're gonna get a little bit of a walk around the town. So, we're gonna look at the... What? Get in there. Get in there. Get in there.

Get in there. Get in there. Get in there. Get in there. Get in there. Yes! Yes! Yes!

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I'm definitely planning my trip. Thank you for it. Stand for us. Stand for us. You guys are... We're going to do three days next year at...