Leah on the Line - Bonus 64: GIRL TOPICS! Periods, friendships and making the first move

Episode Date: November 10, 2023

Hey babes! Welcome back to another episode of Leah on the Line. Thank you so much for all of your love and support on the podcast, it honestly means the world to me. I hope you love this one!Head to l...eahontheline.com to send in your dilemmas and confessions. Love you! Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 Hello. Hi, everyone. Welcome back to a brand new episode of Lear on the Line. Happy Friday. Happy Friday, everybody. I'm really excited. Today, today this episode we're going to be talking all things girl things girly things just girl stuff you know and I'm really looking forward to it we've got period talk coming up any male listening to this is just crossed off we've got period talk we've got how to hit up someone um girl friendship dramas all girl problems girl stuff okay so I'm really looking forward to it but I hope you're all doing really well I don't actually have much to update you on apart from right I feel like it's in spirit of the episode so obviously you guys know I did mention I'm going to the doctors at the moment about my periods and stuff, right?
Starting point is 00:01:06 And so did I actually, did I mention, have I spoken to you about that appointment? I actually don't think I have. Well, I'm really sorry if I have. I'm a bit concerned if I have because I've totally forgotten. My memory may be a bit messed up. But anyway, so if I haven't I'm gonna say it again if I have but whatever so I have an appointment right obviously very scared you you guys know me by now and I've built up the courage come on let's get to the bottom of this
Starting point is 00:01:35 let's find out what's going on down there right I'm sitting there yeah you know like I feign I vomit you know it's like I'm in labor. It's like I need to call an ambulance. Only thing that stops me from calling an ambulance is the fact that I've been here hundreds of times in my life, probably not hundreds, but whatever. Anyway, so I'm telling her how awful it is, how awful it is. And she's like, okay, okay. So I'm going to examine you today. And for some reason, guys, it didn't cross my mind that she might want to do that it didn't I have no clue why right so I was like yeah of course guys I am not ashamed to admit I hadn't showered I hadn't showered I you know doctors I was an anxious mess I just had to get up take a deep
Starting point is 00:02:23 breath get ready and go like it was it was stressful right so I've had an even child I thought oh god you know hopefully hopefully it's all right down there worst part I hadn't shaved and listen nothing wrong with a hairy puss but when you're someone like me who you feel you're freshest when she's soft, soft, soft, freshly, freshly shaven. It feels so like, oh God, because it's not like nice and neat. It's just prickly and messy. Like it's coming down the leg at that point. You know, you guys know, right? Whatever. Anyway, I was like, oh yeah, of course. So I had my smear not long ago, didn't I? So I was like, this is, oh, you know, this is clockwork to me right now. And I know how it works. it works yeah but anyway I get past the fact that I hadn't fucking
Starting point is 00:03:09 showered because I'm a scab and then I haven't shaved either whatever I just think do you know what she's seen every vagina you can imagine who cares she's not judging me she's a doctor so anyway I get on the bed open my legs exact same way I did for the smear I'm stood there sat there led there even not covered by anything my doctor doesn't cover you you know when I went to my doctor in London and I had the internal ultrasound they cover you with like a thing to wrap around you so you're not just sat there with your whole pussy out but anyway my one's just like get it out babe so whatever I've done this before only last month so whatever i know what i'm doing that's what i thought i'm laying there with my legs open yeah she's turned around getting all the equipment and i'm waiting
Starting point is 00:03:53 for her to turn around puss in the face right anyway she turns around she's like okay if you just want to put your feet together i was like i'm mortified I've been sat there with my whole fanny out and she's like okay pop your feet together honey and then lower the knees okay I was like oh okay I said they're feet wide apart hun do you know what I mean so she was like right feet together knees down I was like oh okay lamp big lamp desk lamp comes fucking sliding down up to my fan yeah like a dentist lamp she gets that up in the purse I was like okay what the fuck you are seeing a sight I even I have never seen I have never shone a light and looked at my vagina and I could never see it from that angle unless I did it in a mirror and you know we've all looked at our vaginas in the mirror but not with a bloody lamp do you know what I mean anyway so I'm like okay and she puts the thing in that opens you up and
Starting point is 00:04:49 she said I'm just gonna use a little small one I thought perfect you know I thought perfect right and then she's like right I'm just gonna take a sample blah blah blah and she goes you look lovely and brown you've been on holiday this year i thought don't try and convince me this isn't happening i'm so aware of what's happening right now chatting to me about holiday it's like i'm getting my hair cut i was like literally laying there puss open little things scraping my insides yeah just come back from Tenerife yeah really nice it's so funny right anyway and then she has a proper look so she gets the sample puts it in the bag whatever wherever it goes I don't know I wasn't looking and then I was just staring at the scene and like god make it make it end and then she goes I'm just gonna have a little look and
Starting point is 00:05:41 just see how it's looking I thought oh that's good because I can't see all up in there so I'm just gonna have a little look and just see how it's looking I thought oh that's good because I can't see all up in there so I'm quite pleased that she's gonna get a good look right she goes yeah this all looks normal all looks normal bit of mucus in there listen that is so normal obviously discharge basically mucus discharge she meant she was talking about discharge right mucus is just discharge whatever so when she said it for some reason i was really embarrassed was i embarrassed i do you do like but for some reason she's like bit mucus up there's like okay and then she went but that's totally normal i was like right you so what you're telling me is you could have just not said that do you know what i mean normal so that comment could have gone unsaid realistically but for some reason I
Starting point is 00:06:26 found it really embarrassing I was like okay oh and then I had to get my pants on and sit there and you know because they use like a lube don't they and it goes it's all slimy in your knickers oh but she was really good bless her I'm so great bless her what am I about bless her bless her oh bless she was really good bless her no she was really good and I'm really grateful but I'm getting like all these tests and checks which is fucking terrifying for me but um definitely got to be done you know I'm I'm strong I'm confident I'm brave so yeah that's the update on my periods guys oh so funny though isn't it yeah oh just crying though when i walked out i was like fucking hell and i had to have my bloods done i went to the hospital that day because she gave
Starting point is 00:07:16 me a slip to go get my blood done at the hospital and i rang my mum to update her on what the doctor said and then she was like oh you might as well go do that now wasn't it I was like whoa whoa fucking hell I was gonna give myself at least 30 working days to hype myself up for that I've just gone to a doctor's appointment hun anyway she said you know what get it done get out the way what then now get it done I said I said do you know what Deanne you're fucking right and I did and when it got my bloods done and you know what I've realized I'm kind of funny with blood but not too bad it's just the whole process of getting bloods fucking cringes me out mate it is the cringiest thing ever like it is so cringe and you know when they wrap the band around your arm oh my god make it end and honestly i was listening to the clock
Starting point is 00:08:08 ticking because for some reason the woman that's taking my blood like she didn't really speak to me and i was just as well would but anyway so i'm listening to the clock ticking and for some reason my brain liked to torch me and it was imagining that every tick of the clock was a drip of blood and it made it feel a lot longer so don't do that but honestly I was cringing and I'm curious to know how many of you actually look when you get your bloods done like how many of you actually look at it because could never be me no no no honey I can't look at that oh my god my brother's girlfriend she's really bad with blood like she faints bless her like she proper faints and she's obviously she's pregnant and she's having to have blood tests quite frequently
Starting point is 00:08:49 now and yes it's not ideal for her but yeah i don't mind the whole idea it's just it cringes me out like even after i come out and i couldn't shake off what had just happened to me i was like she has just collected a sample of my blood and like now I'm just I don't know but do you know what fucking freaks me out and I someone out there has the answer one of you guys will work in a hospital or a doctor's surgery and you will know the answer to this what do they do with all everyone's blood so once you've tested the blood and you've got the results that you need where does it all go does it all just go into like a fucking chamber of blood? It's cringing me out bad. But do you know what I mean? Like,
Starting point is 00:09:32 where does all the blood go? Oh, no, I actually uncringed and I need to change the subject. Okay, guys, you know what? That is the end of my period TMI story. Sorry if that graced you out. But I mean, it shouldn't really. But to be fair, I feel like some people, it's like, you don't want to know what's going on with my vagina. Like you, you probably didn't want to know that there was mucus in my vagina that day. But at the same time, there is, there's potentially mucus in your vagina right now. So who actually cares? Okay, guys, you know what? I think we should just get straight into the episode thank you so much for listening to leah on the line head to leah on the line.com to send in
Starting point is 00:10:11 your dilemmas and confessions remember to follow on socials to see visual clips and get involved with the weekly debates enjoy the episode love you okay everybody so on the topic of periods by the way this whole episode isn't going to be about periods there's honestly not much more but on the topic we might as well stick on it for a minute i put up some stories asking some girly questions and one of them i was really curious about is how many of you have been to the doctor regarding your periods so i put a poll up asking if you ever had and i'm quite surprised so 54 of us have been to the doctor regarding our periods that's more than half of us so essentially most women have been to the doctor about your period isn't that crazy whether that be pain or you know they're irregular you've
Starting point is 00:11:06 lost your period they're really really painful they're really really heavy whatever the complications are whatever your worries are you you might just have questions more than half of us are going to a doctor for our periods isn't that like kind of upsetting anybody but 46 percent of you are saying no and can i just say i can't actually imagine that you've had a life where like one day you just started your period for the first time you're like oh there she is and it's just been like no complications you've never had to go to a doctor like that must be so nice my mum was like that like she said that when she was my age never had period pain like they were literal clockwork my sister is the exact like she said that when she was my age never had period pain like they were
Starting point is 00:11:45 literal clockwork my sister is the exact same she never gets period cramps you know they get like a bit moody the week before and snappy but they didn't get cramps yeah and then there's little old me just fucking taking them for everyone like but yeah I thought that was so interesting okay and then I put up a little box saying you know what do you want to talk about regarding periods because I genuinely genuinely get a lot of questions a lot of dms a lot of emails asking me to discuss periods contraception um you know like endometriosis polycystic ovaries I genuinely genuinely I think that is the thing I get asked the most to discuss besides like dilemmas so I thought what what do you guys want to discuss you know let's get into it um let's have a little look somebody has because I basically said anything to share any questions any areas to discuss or anything you want to say
Starting point is 00:12:44 so let's have a look. Oh, somebody says, stay away from doctors who say going on the pill will stop the pain with a red flag emoji. That was me all my life, to be honest, because do you know what? The difficult thing is it does help with the pain for me, for me. I'm talking for me personally. It does help with the pain, but it's not really diagnosing a problem here we're not understanding the problem we're just you know brushing it under the rug you know and I've said that to a doctor once and I said
Starting point is 00:13:13 you know I'm happy about the fact that the pill does help because it stops my periods so I'm not getting that pain however the pain I am getting on periods isn't normal which means there is clearly something going on and I would like to know what that is because I should probably do something about that and do you know what she turned around and said to me are you trying you know are you hoping to have children at any time soon I said no not anytime soon and then she went then in that case I think we just cross that bridge when we get to it I think we worry about what's going on when you want to have children I thought why why why why worry about them why not do something now but whatever I listened to her because I was just young and insecure all right um somebody says my period stopped for 18 months during first lockdown
Starting point is 00:14:02 yeah that's crazy you know it's do you know it's so common to lose your periods like there is so much surrounding your periods like so much goes into it like in psychology stress your diet exercise like everything it's a wild oh on that note right i realized how many of you right because i personally didn't I realized I don't actually know what is going on in my body every month I genuinely don't know what what is the cycle what's happening like I genuinely don't so I googled it and I was having a look at the menstrual cycle and I was like oh okay so let me literally read this out to you to anyone that doesn't know I'm sure loads of you do but it's something that we were probably
Starting point is 00:14:52 taught in school but everybody was cringing so no one was listening do you know what I mean like we were probably so young so let's have a little look okay days one to seven boys you can listen to that you definitely turned off but if there's any boyfriends in the background listening you can listen to this as well because it might be helpful for you to know okay days one to seven your uterus lining breaks down men's menstruation how do you say that word menstruation men menstruation i always said menstruation that's not correct men's menstruation whatever occurs so that's your period right that's the bleed right when you're menstruating or however you fucking say that so i can't say it i don't understand it what the heck okay so i'm assuming
Starting point is 00:15:39 that's your period that's the bleed and then days 8 to 11 the lining of the womb thickens in preparation for the egg which i was like okay all i know about the lining of the womb is the mini pill that i was on thins the lining of your womb so i'm assuming that's how it prevents pregnancy i'm not sure but whatever okay so eight days 8 to eleven the lining of the womb is getting thick she's thickening up in preparation for the egg right days 12 to 17 ovulation occurs usually on day 14 okay so this is where the ovulation is taking place this is where you are fertile right you're i'm ovulating you know like that's that's when you're you're fertile, right? I'm ovulating, you know, like that's when you're fertile, right? Okay. And then 18 to, days 18 to 25, if fertilization has taken place, the corpus
Starting point is 00:16:38 luteum fades away. Now, somebody needs to tell me what that means because I'm reading this and they're talking to me like I'm supposed to know what that means because i'm reading this and they're talking to me like i'm supposed to know what that means so what happens is the corpus luteum fades away ah makes sense pardon i don't i honestly don't get that but yeah i thought that was worth worth looking into what have i just done i've literally just shared this to somebody i think my judge is accidentally saying that to some random person like the menstrual cycle they'll be like okay so yeah how interesting guys all right what else have you guys got to say um i have the implant and have been on my period for two and a half years what what oh my god you have bled for two and a half
Starting point is 00:17:30 years that cannot be safe babe what um i thought having pain was normal found out i've got pcos is more common than we think do you know what as well when i got told i've got pco they said to me you've got more cysts on she said to me all women have cysts on their ovaries but you if you have more cysts than the usual amount which i think she said was about eight is it's considered polycystic i said oh that makes sense the doctor i'm seeing now she goes no they're not cysts you know despite the name they're not cysts they're they're fluid filled sacs i thought is that not cis but anyway she said it's different an ovarian cyst is different to polycystic ovaries i thought does anybody know here does anyone know what the
Starting point is 00:18:26 fuck's going on because one person told me you've got polycystic ovaries next person tells me oh yeah but you can she said to me you might have just had more cysts that month than normal so you might not have polycystic ovaries you might have just had your scan at a time where you've got a bit more cysts than you normally do so they've diagnosed you polycystic ovaries I thought what and now this doctor's going well they're not actually cysts what is going on like it's so confusing so basically guys what I'm telling you is any information I come at you with today I'm not a doctor I have no idea what I'm talking about because even the doctors I go to they I can't even understand it after talking to them and then I'm still confused so yeah sorry about that um let's have a look what else you guys are saying um I've always been a regular girl same time every month started getting later and later went doctors and was told nothing
Starting point is 00:19:17 wrong nothing's wrong is this normal okay guys I like I, I have no fucking idea. Like, I'm not ever going to give medical advice. But what I would say is, always get a second opinion if you don't feel relieved. Like, if you walk out of a doctor's surgery and you feel like, I just kind of feel shoved away, like, just go talk to somebody else. You know, it's always good to sit there and say, you know, I spoke to somebody and I don't know, I don't get how that is normal. Ask them to explain to you why it is normal, how it is normal. Tell me what's going on in my body that makes it normal, you know i spoke to somebody and i don't know i don't get how that is normal ask them to explain to you why it is normal how it is normal tell me what's going on in my body that makes it normal you know um i always get extreme headaches for the entire week of my period every single time no that is hell that is absolute hell um i came off contraception in april this year and still haven't had a period so when i came off my
Starting point is 00:20:07 pill i i was told that three months after three months if you if your period still hasn't come back after three months then go to a doctor and they can try and help bring it on luckily mine literally came on mine came on the fourth month so yeah if if you haven't got it after coming off your pill i would just pop into the doctor and see if there's anything that they can do or say to you or you know any advice maybe um did the mini pill stop your periods completely because it stopped mine it stopped mine and it worries me a bit yeah for me it did I might have had like a couple of days of bleeding, but yeah, I had no periods ever. But actually on that note, somebody sent in a one of these saying about how they love their pill because they had really irregular periods. And since being on the pill, they now have really regular periods and they love the pill for that
Starting point is 00:21:05 what i want to say is to anybody that doesn't actually know this because i found out not that long ago your your period on your pill isn't a real period it's withdrawal bleeding so it's something to do with your body is lacking hormones and your you bleed from the it's like the level of hormones drop like i said i don't know what i'm talking about here it's just something i've read or been told your level of hormones drop and you bleed because of that it's not a period let me have a proper look at this okay so this website um it says your period on the contraceptive pill is actually called withdrawal bleeding it happens when the level of hormones in your pills drop withdrawal withdrawal bleeding is usually lighter and slightly different than the period you had before taking the pill some people experience only very
Starting point is 00:22:04 light bleeding or don't bleed at all your bleeding on the pill is likely to change over time the bleeding you get when you're on the pill is not the same as a menstrual period your period on the pill is technically called withdrawal bleeding referring to the withdrawal of hormones in your pill and in your body the drop in hormone levels causes the lining of your uterus to shed this bleeding may be slightly different um before you had to the period you had before taking the pill okay so it says yeah you're if you on if you're taking your pill consistently you you shouldn't ovulate and so obviously that's that's why you don't get real periods it It's just withdrawal bleeding. So when I heard that, I thought, oh my God, that means I haven't had a period in years. My body has not had a period in
Starting point is 00:22:51 years. So that's what made me want to come off the pill because I was like, I don't know what periods look like for me now because I've been on and off the pill for 10 years. I'm currently off it. I've been off it since April. And yeah, I started it when I was 16. Because when I've had my first period, it was like after a year of periods, they were hell. People were telling me that I was miscarrying, like all this fucking crazy shit. And then it just turned out it was happening every month. And I thought, oh my god, this is actually just my period. So yeah, I was on the pill because that's the first thing the doctors was doing for me back then. It was like, oh, you're in pain, take the pill. And I thought, okay. So I was on the pill for so many years and I had so many issues with it, whether it be like,
Starting point is 00:23:33 I felt really depressed or I was like, you know, I didn't feel like myself. I want to know what it feels like to not be on the pill. So I'd try and come off of it and then I'd be in agony and I'd give it six months and I couldn't cope with the pain any longer. So I'd go back on pill so I'd try and come off of it and then I'd be in agony and I'd give it six months and I couldn't cope with the pain any longer so I'd go back on it and I'd be on it for two and a half three years and then I'd come off it because I want to try again and then I can't cope with the pain so I go back on it so I'm currently off it I've been off it since April and yeah so I it freaked me out so much thinking what are my periods like is it so painful because of all this on and off with the pill like I don't know so yeah I'm trying to go cold turkey with the pill and just get all the
Starting point is 00:24:13 tests I need to do to find out what's going on for me personally um I went in to have the coil and was told I was nine weeks nine weeks I had no clue. Oh my God, no way. I had bad periods, got on the pill, forgot my pill often. Now I have an IUD. Have I ever told you guys the story about when I went to get the coil fitted? So this is the other thing. This is why I find it really hard to go to doctors because I always just end up feeling really upset and frustrated after because I've had so many experiences that make me feel worse so I went through my phase again where I was like right I'm coming off the pill I want to know what's happening in my body I'm ringing the doctors finally ring the doctors she says to me
Starting point is 00:24:56 um have you ever looked into endometriosis I said yeah babe I've been trying to tell the doctors that I think I've got it for 10 years she goes okay let's do some tests those tests never happen but it's fine and this was like two years ago now and then she said to me um have you thought about take I mean going on the coil instead of the pill the pill because she said I'd need the uh hormone the hormone coil not the copper coil which one is it or is it the copper no the copper coil has no hormones right and then it's the other one where it has hormones and she basically said the hormones are much less because it goes directly into your uterus your cervix one of them and so yeah they don't need as as an intense level of hormones because it's not have it's not having to go all the way through your body it's literally going directly
Starting point is 00:25:49 to the area it needs to go to so I said okay perfect like no periods no pain less hormones sounds a lot better than the pill she's sets me up going to a sexual health clinic to get it all like fitted in and stuff I go to the sexual health clinic and they literally made me cry it was two women as well which I was like wow okay this is fucked the way you're talking to me is really upsetting but I sat in the room with them and then there was this bed that had like fucking claws for your legs it was like a big horrible chair that you lift your legs up and it's almost like a restraint chair i was like uh looking at it like oh my god my heart's pounding up my chest just looking at it anyway she was asking me all the questions and i was like when you know i get really painful periods bearing in mind you guys know i have health anxiety so
Starting point is 00:26:40 whenever i'm in any sort of room like that my heart's beating out my chest I'm sweating I'm talking quietly I'm petrified I'm like yeah I get um really painful periods and you know and she goes if you get painful periods why would you want the coil like that and I was like a doctor recommended it to me she explained it to me it sounded like it was a good idea and you're on the mini pill now yeah well you shouldn't be on the mini pill if you get painful periods I said why she goes the mini pill makes your period pain worse I said well not being funny but I've been on it about 10 years and it definitely doesn't I was like it doesn't for me because I don't get them I don't really get periods when I'm on this pill so it's helping for me she went no you are not on the right pill for you and I said no it has worked for me and then she went what if it's working for you why do you want the coil and I literally just started
Starting point is 00:27:35 crying and I was like can I just go please I just want to go and then she started like wheeling over to me on her chair and she's like feeling I don't know if she it didn't feel like she felt guilty I feel like she probably more felt like I'm gonna lose my job and I was just like please I just want to go and the door was shut obviously because it's a private room and I was just like I had this fear I didn't want to just stand up and walk out because I felt like that was so rude so I wanted and I wanted to diffuse the situation like I didn't want to seem like I was like fuck you and like run away I was like no I'm just really upset like this has just really overwhelmed me and she was like why are you overwhelmed and I said I've got health anxiety like it was really hard for me to come down here today and I don't know
Starting point is 00:28:13 I'm just really overwhelmed and then she was just like okay well do you want some water and I was like no I just want to get out I just want to get out please can I just get out the room and then she was like okay and I literally just laughed but honestly i'm really glad i didn't get it now because looking back i don't think i thought about it enough i do feel like i just listened to a doctor and that's the kind of thing where like i would have to go in and get it removed i wouldn't be able to just like what i do now i can just stop my pill you know so yeah um what else are you guys saying mine have always been bad and led to severe anemia where I've needed iron infusions. Oh my God, babe.
Starting point is 00:28:51 Do you know what? I've never struggled with really heavy periods. And I feel like that's why a lot of doctors sort of brush me off about endometriosis because one of the symptoms is really heavy periods. But I'm like, but I've got every other symptom, every single one, apart from one. I've got 99 out of 100 symptoms, please. For the past six months, I've been getting two periods a month. I've been to a doctor and they've said nothing. Oh, you just got to keep pushing, babe. So yeah, my next question for you guys is are you on contraception because I thought I'm so
Starting point is 00:29:26 curious to know how many of us are you know because I think most people I know are most girls I know they're taking some sort of contraception but 52% said yeah and 48% said no which surprised me quite a bit and I'm you know it's quite nice because I feel like quite a while ago, I feel like maybe to be fair, it's because of our age. I feel like we're all roughly around a similar age. And I feel like when we was younger, like when we was teenagers, maybe that would have been higher. Do you know what I mean? But who knows? So I then asked, you know, if you're happy to share, what's the reason the reason um so you know whether you're on it or off it what just curious what's the reason and let's have a look what you guys have said
Starting point is 00:30:10 um i've been on the pill for over 10 years now purely for period pain the coil to help with my heavy periods and reduce my cramps it's worked so well um preventing pregnancy endo management preventing pregnancy i'm on the iud coil non-hormonal for contraception works better for me than anything else preventing pregnancy i'm on the iud um i'm not on it to get pregnant oh me and contraception doesn't mix well put on weight mood swings headaches migraines yeah i have health anxiety and i'm scared of the side effects pregnancy and hormones coil it reduced my periods i bled for a whole year straight on the implant before i had a regular before i had a regular period oh my god
Starting point is 00:30:58 okay this is this is the girl i'm on the pill to make my periods more regular they were all over the show and now i'm clockwork so yeah that was who I read where I wanted to mention about how they're not real periods because somebody sent it to me and I thought, what? That can't be true. What is the blood then? But yeah, apparently it's the lining of your endometrial and something. And I don't know. But yeah, purely pregnancy prevention I wish I didn't have
Starting point is 00:31:30 to take it um I don't like the idea of contraception in my body I take it so I don't have a period every month best thing ever no it was giving me migraines and made me not feel like myself i'm on it for pcos um it was acne but now as contraception too preventing pregnancy in odd period times i feel like the pill definitely was better for my skin like since coming off the pill i've really struggled with my skin um but then a symptom of pOS is I guess it says acne and I obviously don't have acne but I do go through phases where it could be considered maybe like mild acne like it can just go overnight like I'll have so clear skin and then overnight I'll wake up and there's hundreds
Starting point is 00:32:18 and and it's just wild and yeah it happens really frequently since coming off the pill so I do wonder if it's if it's my periods okay so I think that's enough for period talk I don't want to talk too much about it I say that it's been over half an hour and I've spoke about periods the whole time but you know what it just kind of shows like we can go on and on and on about this for so long because we are so confused and it is complicated and it is not straightforward so yeah I'm glad we had this talk I hope anybody that can relate to my situation any of your situations other people can relate to I hope you feel a bit more comforted you know less alone maybe this gave you the encouragement to you know what I'm gonna go to the doctor and sort out what the fuck's going on with my body you know because
Starting point is 00:33:01 I put it off for so long and I had somebody talking about it and that's what made me book it and I cannot oh it was actually Jamie Lang's podcast he did a podcast of his therapist and she said prevent no avoidance keeps your anxiety alive and I realized I avoid the doctors and that definitely keeps it alive so I'm going to go to the doctors but yeah I hate talking about when I have doctor's appointments because obviously I have the fear that I'm gonna have scary news and then like people ask me but yeah no I'm just I'm trying to remind myself that going to the doctor about periods about anything is just a normal part of life and it doesn't always have to be so petrifying so like it's okay to talk about it you know what i mean so yeah okay enough period talk let's get on to other grilly things so i had one of you guys ask me you wanna you want me to discuss how to make the first move
Starting point is 00:33:58 with a man that's that was from one of you guys so i put up a story on Instagram saying how do you make the first move okay so let's have a little look just be honest I think I think your cue want to go for drinks someday that would oh I've just dropped my phone that would definitely be big big slay because it is no guy out there would not want to hear that. You know, like if a girl messaged him or came over to him and was like, sorry, I don't really do this well. I think you're really attractive. And I just wondered if you don't have a girlfriend, maybe you'd want to go out for a drink or something.
Starting point is 00:34:38 You know, any guy would be fucking buzzing with it. They just would. I feel like, you know, it would make them feel good. No. So yeah, I, I'm with you on that. Eye contact. It's simple, but it gets the message across that you're interested. Give them the eyes. Everyone knows the ones. Yeah, we know the eyes guys. Just go and say hello. I caught eyes with a guy in Pret and gave him my number. Um, big slay. I caught eyes with a guy in Pret and gave him my number um big slay when when I was out with my sister like over a year ago we were out at the pub right and when when we were parking by the way we only had one drink before it sounds like we were like drink driving no fucking way yeah we went and
Starting point is 00:35:20 sat outside it was like middle of summer and we went and we wanted we was like I fancy a smell of ice in the sun so we went and sat in the sun and had a smell of ice right and when we was parking she saw these guys getting out of like a work van and and she was like that guy's fit and and then we was gigging for a while and he was looking back and i thought oh he spotted you he spotted you and then when we were sat down i was like we were waiting for them to like come back out because I didn't really get a good look of him I wanted to see who she fancied and stuff but I didn't really get good look of him because he didn't come back out so then we quickly had to go because we just had one getting in the car they're still inside we sat outside they hadn't
Starting point is 00:35:59 come outside yet and I said to her you should leave a note on the on the windscreen with your phone number on it and she we were laughing she's like should I actually and I was like yeah 100% say the guy in the red jumper whatever he was wearing um I'm really sorry if you have a girlfriend but if you don't oh seven blah blah blah do you know what I mean so we did Annie text her nothing came from it but they you know they had some chats over text and you know she shot her shot so I like that one um I asked my man out with a crossword and he had to work out the words oh my god that was that must have took you a lot of time and effort i love that from you just slide into those dms back yourself girl yeah i agree i actually agree i slid into jamie's dms
Starting point is 00:36:53 like fucking brave as well with my fucking whole chest literally whole chest and look at us now slide into those dms hope for the best say hi they're such simple creatures so true hi um touch their leg or arm and give them the bedroom eyes fuck you know i'm talking like how do we hit on someone but to be fair my wording of question did sound like how to initiate the sexy time so in that case abso-fucking-lutely it's always the touch and the leg or the arm and the eyes i'm with you babe um liking old insta pics insta stories etc if too shy to dm if they're interest if they're interested they'll usually dm you maybe they'll like some pics too first but it tends to work well in my opinion in my experience is the success rate is pretty high love it the eyes up down eyes up down lips okay the wording
Starting point is 00:38:01 was confusing but i know exactly what you mean the eyes up and down from the from their eyes to their lips yep it's a classic it's a classic post a good pic and hope they comment so your way of making a first move is I don't show them any attention and there is no implication that I fancy them whatsoever that is my first move I love it um I don't and then I wonder why I'm single let them know how you feel worked for me been together 11 months now big slay um confidence is key I just walked up to my now boyfriend and said heard you're single whoa no that's funny i love that hey i heard you're single i love that if i fancy someone i'll just message them usually a story reply saying cute yeah i love
Starting point is 00:38:54 that cute cute compliment their outfit yeah that's always a classic um message me first mood i once started typing on snapchat so we got the notification then i stopped which made him message me i like it i like it but i don't use snapchat so i couldn't i couldn't do that after being friends for two years i kissed him drunk i was the first to initiate the kiss of my boyfriend. Just go for it smoothly. Yeah, babe. Like at least three of their Insta posts randomly to get them to hopefully pop up. Just slide straight into the DMs. Confidence is key. Sometimes you just have to go for it and not overthink it. Yeah, do you know what, guys? I say go for it. I seriously say just go for it.
Starting point is 00:39:47 I say go for it. I seriously say just go for it. Okay. So my next question for you girlies is how many best friends do you have? So how many of your friends do you consider to be? I sounded really Australian then, didn't I? Do you consider to be best friends, you know? And I gave you guys three options. Five plus, three to five or one to two. What do you guys think this is? This is probably how I expected the poll to go to be fair. So we've the one to two club for sure three to five thirty one percent and five plus three percent i cannot imagine having five plus best friends that would take so much time because everyone was always going through something you know like it is hard enough for me and jess like when things are going shit for me and it's like right Jess you gotta step up to the plate now come on you gotta help me drag me through it's it's lucky if we time it in a way where we we're not trying to be there for each other at the same time as hell do you know what
Starting point is 00:40:57 I mean and then you've got four other people to balance their like needs and emotions and be a really good friend to all five god yeah that's that's a lot of time but you know what it sounds lovely it sounds really nice but yeah i'm in the one to two club my next question is do you feel competitive with your friends so my three aren't my three, my three options for you guys are, yeah, low key, low key, I do, yeah. Second option is slightly envious, I guess, you know. And the last, the last one is not, oh, go bestie, right? So we have 11% have said, yeah, low key do yeah low-key I am fucking I do feel a bit of fucking competition with that bitch yeah low-key and then 23% have said yeah you know what I do feel slightly envious yeah so they might have just bought a house they might have just got engaged they might have just
Starting point is 00:42:02 had a promotion they might be making fucking bag every month and you're a little bit envious but 66% of you are going fucking get on babe love the house can't wait to decorate my room in the house the spare room you know so yeah I thought that was interesting next question is did you find friendships in school toxic slash problematic? This didn't surprise me, to be honest. For the girlies, 84% have said, yes, I did. Yes, I fucking did. And 16% have said no. And and firstly all i want to say is what school did you go to and where is it because i will send my kids there because my school was so bad for bullying they did not give a shit they did not give a flying fuck i'd literally be like i was pushed
Starting point is 00:43:01 over in the playground today in front of everybody and And they'd be like, stay away from her. Just stay away from her. Do you not think I've tried that? Do you think I'm going up to her and saying, come on, give it to me. Give it to me. Do you think I'm going up to her? Stay away from her. Like it's honestly the worst thing. They're just jealous. Do you know what? annoying at the time but it is true it is true you know happy people don't hate is facts okay my next question have you ever got with a friend's ex I'm pleased to say that 84% have said no, I haven't. But 16%, 16% guys have said, yes, I have. Yeah. Oh my God. That yawn came out of nowhere. Oh, felt good though. oh i felt good though so yeah guys that was my girly episode friendships how to hit on a guy and lots and lots of period talk i really enjoyed this episode though i feel like it's so nice to discuss these things every now and then because i'll tell you something right growing up i did
Starting point is 00:44:22 not have people talking about periods i'd never heard of polycystic ovaries when i was even like 18 like i i didn't know that was i didn't know what it was i probably heard of it but i didn't know what it was i didn't know anybody that spoke about it i didn't see people talking about periods and stuff and and pain and mucus so i think we should change that because why should it be taboo and embarrassing when periods is just a natural normal thing like why is it an embarrassing thing to talk about it's literally without periods you wouldn't even be here you know so why is it a taboo topic weird let's make it not taboo okay guys i love you please stay for the outro and let's wrap up
Starting point is 00:45:07 the episode okay guys thank you so much if you are still listening and stayed for the outro I love you you mean the world to me I hope you guys are feeling good what day is it Friday it's a Friday oh my god it's Friday happy Friday everybody it? Friday. It's a Friday. Oh my God, it's Friday. Happy Friday, everybody. It's the weekend. Who's like, whoa, my phone just vibrated on my vagina. That felt really weird. Who's excited for the weekend? What are you guys doing this weekend?
Starting point is 00:45:34 I am having a clear out day with my mum to sort out the loft. And then on Sunday, why do I feel like I have plans on Sunday? But then I kind of feel like I don't. Maybe my mum has plans. Oh, I have plans on Sunday but then I kind of feel like I don't maybe my mum has plans oh I have no clue but anyway I hope you guys all have an amazing weekend whatever it's that you're getting up to thank you so much for listening to this episode I hope you enjoyed these girly chats let me know what episode you want next Friday anything you want to talk about if you want to do another girly episode let me know all different topics we can discuss and I'll speak to you on Tuesday for a brand new episode
Starting point is 00:46:09 all right I love you

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