Let's Go To Court! - 84: A Big Hug & An Incredible Story of Survival
Episode Date: August 28, 2019It was Sean Tarala’s eighth birthday party, and man was he excited. He’d just gotten a new red bike! He was gonna eat cake! And then, just when life couldn’t get any better, his aunt, Jennifer C...onnell, showed up. “Auntie Jen! Auntie Jen!” he shouted. He ran to her. He lept into her arms. But Jennifer wasn’t prepared for such an exuberant hug. The pair tumbled to the ground. Jennifer experienced immediate pain in her wrist. So what did she do? She sued her nephew for $127k. You’ll want to hear the whole story. This one has a twist ending. Then Brandi tells us an incredible story of survival. Robert Lee Burton was a controlling, abusive boyfriend. Following a violent attack, Melissa Dohme got a restraining order against Robert. That restraining order effectively ended their relationship. Melissa felt like a new woman. She felt free. But Robert didn’t want to let her go. He called her and called her. He begged her for closure. He said he wanted one last hug. Melissa said okay. And now for a note about our process. For each episode, Kristin reads a bunch of articles, then spits them back out in her very limited vocabulary. Brandi copies and pastes from the best sources on the web. And sometimes Wikipedia. (No shade, Wikipedia. We love you.) We owe a huge debt of gratitude to the real experts who covered these cases. In this episode, Kristin pulled from: “Aunt who sued nephew for $127k says she’s not after money,” by Chris Perez for the New York Post “‘She loves us’: Nephew speaks out on aunt’s hug injury lawsuit,” Tribune Media Wire “8-year-old Westport boy on trial for exuberance,” by Daniel Tepfer for the Connecticut Post “Woman loses lawsuit against nephew over ‘exuberant hug,’” by Kim Lacapria for Snopes In this episode, Brandi pulled from: “Live to Tell: One Last Hug” 48 Hours episode “48 Hours: Dating violence survivor tells story” by Melissa Dohme, CBS News “Marrying the man who saved my life” BBC News Magazine “Domestic Abuse Survivor Finds Happily Ever After with First Responder Who Saved Her Life: ‘He Loved Me Through It All’” by Rose Minutaglio, People Magazine
Transcript
Discussion (0)
One semester of law school.
One semester of criminal justice.
Two experts.
I'm Kristen Caruso.
I'm Brandi Egan.
Let's go to court.
On this episode, I'll talk about an exuberant hug.
And I'll be talking about an incredible story of survival.
Oh God, someone went through something horrible.
They survived.
Okay, well I'm glad. I i mean that's rare for your cases
i'm telling you though um in my research of this case i cried several times so i hope i can get
through it right well my case is light oh good so it's about hugs by the way i hope you guys
enjoyed last week's episode featuring d. You've been DP'd!
Don't they know
it. I literally just got
a text from him. He's very upset
because he made four
lengthy Seinfeld
references and I cut all
of them.
And I'm not apologizing for it.
Here's the deal, DP,
because I know you're listening.
Seinfeld references, not your best material.
But that line about the kids being sleuths.
Good stuff.
Also, the Jesus fetus line.
Oh, Jesus fetus.
He had some good lines.
But when he's saying, hey, remember that episode of Seinfeld.
Not your best material.
It's not his material all right are you ready so ready to talk about a hug it was march 18th 2011 we're at are you ready
25 yeah yeah no i was not ready i wasn't picking up the cues at all. I flailed my hands out.
Okay, I'm ready now.
We're at 25 Woods Grove Road, Westport, Connecticut.
Ooh.
Is this?
Cute, right?
Hold on.
Wait, I'm at 25.
Is it 25 or 24?
25.
It's so cute. Adorable. Wait, I'm at 25. Is it 25 or 24? 25. Oh, 25. It's so cute.
Adorable.
Okay, so pictures.
It's Sean Torella's eighth birthday party.
And he's so excited.
Yay!
For his birthday, he got a brand new red bike.
Excellent.
Not a trike.
He was done with tricycles.
He had a bicycle.
Excellent.
Okay? Okay. He's pumped. He's so excited. He was done with tricycles. He had a bicycle. Okay?
Okay.
He's pumped.
He's so excited.
He's riding all over the place.
And then he saw his aunt, Jennifer Connell.
And he was double excited because his auntie came to his birthday party.
So he dropped the new bike to the ground and he ran toward her shouting auntie chin auntie chin
and when he got close enough he yelled auntie chin i love you and he leapt into her arms
excellent what what's gonna happen
you look like you want to be happy but you're not letting yourself i want to be happy so bad but i'm
something's bad's gonna happen he's gonna break her back and she's gonna sue the family
for lost wages as a stripper because she can't do her signature move anymore what was her signature
uh the bulldog thing oh, what's a bulldog?
Don't you remember that? No, what are you talking
about? You know. No, I don't.
No, I don't.
When we were in the 8th grade, it became
this thing that everyone was trying to do this stupid
dance move called the bulldog.
You literally get on all fours and you cross
your... Oh, I do remember that.
Yes!
I'm sure we looked really cool doing that. I'm sure we looked really cool doing that.
I'm sure we did.
So, Jennifer wasn't prepared for the run and jump hug.
She tried to catch him, but they both tumbled onto the ground.
Pretty immediately.
Sorry, Brady.
I'm sorry. She experienced pain in her wrists
but she didn't say anything because it was sean's birthday party and she didn't want to ruin
the mood she uh related to sean's mom or dad you know i don't know and technically he was the son
of a cousin but he called Not really an aunt.
But you know, they called.
Okay, okay.
So she suffers in silence
and then she got back home
to Manhattan
and the pain didn't go away.
To make matters worse,
she lived in a third floor walk-up
so she constantly had to
carry things upstairs
and with one injured wrist, that kind of sucked.
What?
Okay.
Well, that's lame.
I'm going to run and jump hug at you.
And I will catch you, Kristen.
I'll have the time of my life.
I'll catch you, and I will lift you over my head. Do you think you really could? No, get you and I will lift you over my head.
Do you think you really could?
No, probably not.
I do lift Cameron over my head, though.
How dare you?
Cameron is my nine-year-old niece.
Is she five foot nine and several pounds?
If so, we could make this happen.
So, no, but she likes me to pick her up and then see if I can lift her
over my head. And can you? Yeah. Okay. Okay. I asked her how much she weighed. I don't really
have any ideas. She told me she thinks she weighs 50 pounds. I have no idea if that's accurate or
not. That doesn't seem right for a nine-year-old. How much does a nine-year-old weigh? Well, I don't
really know, but it seems like she'd be more like 80 at that point right no i could lift her over my head so i think that means i'm strong okay you have been looking very veiny
lately that's a serious compliment so she constantly had to carry these things upstairs
and even though brandy doesn't give a shit wow brandy okay i'm just saying if it was her ankle all right yes that
would suck very much it's not you're walking up the stairs on your hands but okay she's living
in manhattan she's gotta get groceries and you can't carry all your groceries in your good arm
and just have your other one a dangling you know all right Plus, later, you ready to really cry for her?
She went to a party.
And it was difficult for her to hold her hors d'oeuvre plate.
Okay.
What?
Is she for real?
She's very for real.
And, you know, you load that thing up with stuffed mushrooms.
It's whore's divorce.
Her wrist was broken.
Well, I do feel bad for her.
That sucks.
Yeah, all right.
Finally some sympathy.
I mean, that would hurt whether you, I feel like a break, right?
That hurts all the time, whether you're using your wrist or not.
Right.
So I think you and I both agree that this eight-year-old is an asshole.
No, that we do not agree about.
She's suing an eight-year-old?
Well, hold the phone.
Just hang on.
What was she to do, I ask you?
Pay her medical bills.
It was just an accident.
Whoa.
Go to the doctor.
Get a cast.
Well.
Probably have to have some physical therapy.
Forgive her eight-year-old nephew.
Well, okay.
Or, and I'm just saying, maybe she could just look her little nephew in his loving eyes and say,
Let's go to court!
No!
Jennifer sued Sean for $127,000.
He's eight! But he was loaded
No he wasn't
He just got that bright red new bike
So you're probably thinking
Well there's no way this went to trial
They had to settle this case
You're wrong
This went to trial?
Yes.
Yes.
Why did I say trial like that?
Trial?
Trial?
You just learned the word trial.
Welcome to our court podcast.
So in October of 2015, when Sean was 12 years old, his trial began.
Jennifer's legal argument was simple. That eight-year-old boy had been
negligent and careless when he gave her that forceful greeting. Any reasonable eight-year-old
knows or should know that when they greet someone in such a forceful manner that they could cause the
type of injury or harm that jennifer suffered so ridiculous no no no any reasonable eight
exactly exactly
so i'm gonna pause here for a quick little legal caveat, because at first I was like, can you really sue a kid for hugging you?
I mean, that seems kind of crazy.
But minors can be held liable for injuries that they inflict negligently.
Which again, but anyway, bottom line is you don't get off scot-free just because you're a kid.
But you're obviously not held to the same standard as an adult either.
But you're obviously not held to the same standard as an adult either.
So the court looks at the child's age, their experience, their judgment, and then they determine from there what expectations are appropriate for that child.
Back to the trial.
This is some bullshit, is what this is.
Why?
It's an eight-year-old kid who was fucking excited to see you.
Yeah.
And he gave you a running hug into your arms because
he's so excited it's his birthday and you came and you're going to sue him so what what annoyed
me about this is this is just the way kids hug yeah the other day. Okay. Literally last weekend, my niece, who is seven, came over to me.
We were going to hug.
I bent down to kiss her on the top of the head.
And she gave me, like, a jump hug.
Yeah.
And head-butted you?
Yeah.
Hurt like you would not believe.
I could have sworn I had, like, rich lady lips.
Like, they puffed out huge.
And I was like, oh, God.
And I was like, are you okay?
And she's like yeah i'm
fine yeah so i'm gonna sue her no you are not yeah 127 000 that's all i want i don't ask for much
i've seen that kid's piggy bank she's got something in there
so jennifer who is an hr manager in manhattan told the six-member jury that she loves Sean,
but he needs to be held accountable for what he did.
Give you a hug?
Yeah.
A forceful greeting.
That caused her to fall over and break her wrist?
Yeah.
Whose fault was that she didn't fall over on her own?
It's not a fault thing.
It was an accident.
Yeah, I completely agree.
By this point,
she'd had two surgeries on her wrist
and it looked like she needed a third.
So, I mean, this legitimately sucked.
But, again, I don't think that's
that's not anybody's fault.
No.
She described what happened on that fateful day.
She said,
All of a sudden, he was there in the air.
I had to catch him and we tumbled onto the ground.
I remember him shouting,
Auntie Jen, I love you.
And there he was, flying at me.
Wow.
How dare he love you?
I'm sure that stopped.
Right?
Sean's lawyer.
Teach you to love me.
Like, what the hell?
Sean's lawyer was like, wow, can we chill?
He told the jury that the only thing Sean was guilty of doing was, quote, trying to give his aunt a hug on his birthday.
Quote, trying to give his aunt a hug on his birthday.
Obviously, reporters covered this trial and everyone had an opinion on it. And everyone's opinion was pretty much the same.
What kind of aunt sues their eight-year-old nephew over a hug?
People were calling Jennifer the world's worst aunt and i love this one the auntie
christ they were saying nasty things about her on social media hashtag aunt from hell was trending
on twitter yeah to make matters even worse by the way I'm going back and forth as I always do between aunt and aunt.
Oh, yeah.
Because you're half Midwest trash.
Half fancy East Coaster.
Half this happened in Connecticut, so I'm trying to be respectful.
To make matters even worse, by the time this case went to court, Sean's mother had died.
So here he was.
What?
Yeah, I know.
His mom dies and his aunt is suing him?
Yeah.
Yeah.
So people were just like, my God, this lady is a total monster.
Yes.
At this point, Jennifer's lawyers were like, whoa, okay, we need to do some damage control.
So they talked to the press.
They said that Jennifer was never looking for money.
They said she had...
Okay, Brandi, people can't hear that face you're making.
Would you like to describe it?
It kind of looks like Columbo.
Yeah.
It's like a... I don't know.
I'm starting to put this together.
Yeah, it seems like you were only
after money.
You know what it also is? Huh.
It's the face Chris Hansen makes
when they're like, I was just coming
to check on the girl.
She said she was home alone
and I was worried. I'm worried about her.
So I brought these condoms.
These box of condoms.
And beer, you know.
Just in case.
You should never show up empty handed.
In case her mom was here.
They said she had no choice in this matter.
She had to sue Sean.
No, she did not.
What was she supposed to do?
To pay her medical bills like a normal person. I already said this.
So get this.
Jennifer's attorneys needed to do damage control.
And here's what they said.
Jennifer's insurance wasn't willing to cover her injury.
So your suggestion about, like, just, you know, have your insurance pay for it doesn't work.
According to Connecticut state law, anyone who files an injury claim on their insurance has to take the responsible party to court.
Really?
That's what they're saying.
There's no way that's true.
Her attorneys prepared a statement for the media, and it read,
She didn't want to do this any more than anyone else would, but her hand was forced by the insurance company.
else would but her hand was forced by the insurance company they said from the start this was a case about one thing getting medical bills paid by homeowners insurance our client was never looking
for money from her nephew or his family it was about the insurance industry and being forced to
sue to get medical bills paid really Really? Is this true?
Are they making this up?
I don't think they're making it up.
I mean, I went through all these articles.
There was never any counter argument.
And I feel like if there was a counter argument,
we would have seen it.
Absolutely.
Jennifer said that she wanted to get the money
from Sean's parents' homeowner's insurance,
but she was advised that under Connecticut state law,
she had to sue an individual
she she truly said this is the last thing i wanted i didn't want to do this but she had these two
surgeries she needed a third and her medical insurance was not going to pay for it okay
all right maybe i'll take back some of my some of my some of my disdain for her.
According to her attorneys before this trial,
Jennifer had tried really hard to get her medical expenses covered by her own insurance.
But her insurance company had only offered her $1.
$1?
Mm-hmm.
They're like that guy in the commercial with the fishing pole? I don't know what you're talking about. That's your dollar. They're like that guy in the commercial with the fishing pole.
I don't know what you're talking about.
I don't know what you're talking about.
It's like a Geico commercial.
I don't watch TV. I mostly just
do projects. You fast forward because you
have a VCR.
She doesn't like me.
Yeah, yours is in the shop. Mine's still in the shop.
No, so, okay. I have to
admit, I was all pumped to do this evil
yeah auntie case and like norman even came in when i was like halfway through with the research
he's like what are you doing for tomorrow i was like oh man i've got this case about this evil
lady who sued her eight-year-old nephew because he hugged her oh my god she's such an asshole and i got to this part and i felt horrible for her
horrible i mean she got dragged by everybody
yeah that's nuts um so my grandpa actually so he has this dog that he walks like for
miles every day okay and he's like my grandpa's like 86 years old 87 years old something
like that okay yeah he takes he takes him for walks every day and they were walking in their
neighborhood one day and there was a dog across the street that is always on a chain and it barks
at his dog his dog's name is franklin barks at franklin every time they go by
right well on this particular day it broke its chain and it came at them knocked my grandpa down
attacked franklin uh somebody passing by had to pull the dog off oh my gosh and franklin
my grandpa ended up breaking his wrist yeah yeah uh franklin had
to go get stitches was like my grandpa's stuff was all covered because of he he's on you know
medicare and whatever sure but franklin's vet bills were like 300 and ended up he didn't have
any puncture wounds everything was okay good yeah he still had to get some vet care. And so my grandpa talked to a lawyer, and they suggested that they sue the owner of the dog to get that.
Because the woman wouldn't just, like, he went and talked to the owner and asked her to cover the vet bills.
She wouldn't do it?
She would not, no.
300 bucks?
Are you kidding me?
Yeah, she would not.
And so he went and talked to a lawyer and and he was like yeah we
can take her to court and you know likely her homeowner's insurance will cover the vet bills
and probably more yeah and so he's been this has been going on for i think i want to say like a
couple of years now oh my god finally just found out that she is a renter at the property and because the dog doesn't isn't owned by the owner of the property
nothing you're kidding me he can't he can't get even his vet bills covered well and by this point
i'm sure he's spent enough on legal fees i think that he went through a lawyer who only collects if we win. That's right. If we don't collect, you don't pay.
Wow.
That sucks. Yeah, it does
suck.
Poor grandpa. I know.
I know. But he's all recovered.
Franklin's fine. Good.
So,
that's all good.
Will you post a picture of Franklin in the
Discord? Ooh, I don't know if I have. I can get a picture of franklin in the discord oh i don't
know if i have i can get a picture of franklin yes and your grandpa yes so they're at trial
because they had to be at trial the whole thing was pretty quick obviously it's not like this
was some big complicated case the jury deliberated for 25 minutes what do you think they decided
wow gosh i'm actually kind of torn because I would think they would decide that.
I can't remember the kid's name now.
Sean.
Sean.
Sean was not at fault.
But if they hear this story about how it's the only way to get her medical bills paid. Maybe they will find him at fault.
See, this is why I wish there was more coverage of the actual trial.
Do they get to hear that?
I don't know.
I don't think so, though.
Because then I feel like the legal argument would be way different.
I don't see why you would make this dumb argument about like,
oh, well, a reasonable eight-year-old would have known blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Yeah, no. So they're going to find in Sean's favor. And they did unanimously. about like oh well a reasonable eight-year-old would have known blah blah blah blah yeah no so
they're gonna find in in sean's favor and they did unanimously okay i think it would be different
if they were able to hear sure the only reason i'm here is because i'm turning up my medical
bills paid and this is what the state requires if i can see why that's not allowed in court yeah if
they were able to get up and say this is stupid this is backward but i've
got 127 000 in medical bills or whatever yeah and someone needs to pay yeah so there you go my
eight-year-old nephew should be the one this was the ruling that i think most people expected
but what jennifer didn't seem prepared for was all of the social media attention she said
it's amazing the power that the internet has that something can go viral completely out of context
that's it yeah it would it would be and i'm i'm giving again the benefit of the doubt that what
her attorney said was correct because i didn't find any evidence otherwise but if what they said
was correct and she really had no other choice otherwise. But if what they said was correct and
she really had no other choice in this, then this poor woman. This poor woman, seriously. She said,
I'm certainly not trying to retire to some villa in the south of France. I'm simply trying to pay
off my medical bills. Oh my goodness. After the verdict came down, Jennifer and Sean went on the
Today Show together.
They wanted to tell the world that they really did love each other and that this lawsuit was basically a formality.
It had been about insurance, not about ill will.
Sean said, she would never do anything to hurt the family and myself.
She loves us. I felt like everybody was saying stuff that they didn't know
and that's the story of an exuberant hug that is so crazy how is that sad i completely had one view
of her i'm gonna be getting and then totally changed it i thought about mixing up the order
a bit but i was like no no, I, I mean, because
I remember this case. Do you remember this case?
No. Okay, I remember it, and man,
I was like, oh yeah, that evil
lady. Oh, I'm gonna do
a story about her. Oh, she sucks
so much.
And no, she doesn't.
She doesn't. She was just trying to get her medical bills
paid, and this is what the state required.
Yeah, the insurance industry sucks so much.
Yeah. Which I totally believe.
Well, yeah. I mean, I think that's the funniest thing is that I definitely know the insurance industry sucks.
I don't know why I had to jump to her being awful.
Right.
But yeah, that's that.
Oh my gosh.
Okay.
I'm going to talk about a story of survival but it's gonna get real sad before it gets happy okay so i'm just warning you going in most stories of survivals do okay yeah yeah so
it's gonna get dark and then it has a very happy ending. I promise. I'm just going to tell you that right off the bat.
Does this involve children?
And there are no children.
Oh, OK. Well, yeah.
No, no children. No. And then the majority of this comes from a 48 hours episode.
I'll wait to tell you the title of the episode until the outro, but I will tell you
that 48 Hours does these episodes called Live to Tell.
Okay.
And this is a Live to Tell episode.
Okay.
I can tell you that since I've already told you it's a survival story.
Wait, spoiler.
Melissa Dome and Robert Burton began dating when they were high school students in Clearwater, Florida.
And things started out great.
Robert was like this super tall ginger who was very charming.
And Melissa was this really cute, sweet, petite little blonde.
Very cute girl.
Kind of an odd couple because he was so tall and she was so short.
But Robert was super funny he
was always bringing Melissa flowers pretty quickly the two were inseparable Melissa even went so far
as to describe their relationship as best friends while things were good Melissa also felt a lot of
pressure and felt like she carried the weight of being fully responsible for Robert's happiness.
He didn't really have anyone else.
He'd had a tough childhood and difficulties with his parents' divorce.
And then when his mom remarried, she'd kind of started over.
She had a couple more kids with her new husband.
And Robert.
And these kids were the real kids.
And Robert all of a sudden felt like an outsider.
Yeah.
The redheaded stepchild, if you will.
Because he's redheaded.
Yeah, I get it.
So Melissa and her mom went out of their way to make sure Robert felt accepted and at home at their house.
As Melissa neared graduation, though, things in the relationship started to change.
Melissa was focused on becoming a nurse, so she spent a lot of time volunteering at local hospitals.
In fact, she graduated high school with 600 volunteer hours, something that looks great on a college application
but robert wasn't super happy about it because it meant time apart from each other
i'm sorry what i just can't imagine telling someone i'm sorry you spend too much time
volunteering you're also not an abusive boyfriend. Oh, that you know of.
When Melissa began applying to colleges, Robert became super jealous and began downgrading Melissa any chance he got.
He called her dumb.
He said she'd never amount to anything. Your classic abusive behavior.
Anything to make Melissa believe she needed him.
I'm so grossed out.
Uh-huh.
Okay.
That she was nothing without him,
would amount to nothing without him.
Was he going to college?
Oh, you know, I don't know.
They didn't really mention it in my research.
I'm wondering if it was like,
you're so dumb, you can only go to the colleges that I'm wondering if it was like, you're so dumb,
you can only go to the colleges
that I'm going to.
Right, yeah.
Melissa followed up with pretty much
textbook behavior of someone
who was being abused.
First, she denied that she was
in an abusive relationship.
She was like, that's not what's happening.
He's just upset.
Things are changing, you know, whatever.
And then when she finally admitted to herself that's what was going on when he started hitting her and all that she
hid it from everyone else yeah including her mom who she was super close to we have talked a bunch
on this podcast about how the most dangerous time to be in an abusive relationship is when you are trying to leave it.
Yes.
So anyone who's like new to the game and they're like, why doesn't she just leave?
It's not that simple.
It's not that simple.
When you are trying to leave is when you are most likely to be murdered.
And this proved to be absolutely true for Melissa.
She tried to break things off with him.
By this point, like they had been together for several years.
She's already off at college and things have just gotten worse.
One day they're in her bedroom.
She's going to college, but she's still living at home.
And so they're in her bedroom one night and he puts his hands around her throat.
Oh, God.
And to the point that she almost passes out.
And so she attempted to break things off multiple times,
and each time she did, he either threatened to or attempted suicide.
Oh, God.
Yeah.
So he made multiple attempts at suicide.
He threatened suicide.
He threatened to kill her mother.
Mm-hmm.
And hurt the people that she loved if she left him.
Yep.
And so she stayed.
And the things in the relationship continued to escalate until one night in October of 2011.
Something Melissa did somehow set Robert off. And all of a sudden he was punching her.
He was pulling her hair and she just took off running. She grabbed her phone and she dialed
911 and she just kept running. And what year was this? This was 2011. Okay. Gotcha. Gotcha.
So she's on the phone with, with the dispatcher and she's like
he's gonna come after me he was beating me up like is somebody coming is somebody going to be here
soon and then she got really worried because she had run away from her house and so she's like
he's gonna kill my mom oh my gosh i know he knows that i have run away and that i've called 9-1-1 he's gonna go
in there and kill my mom yeah and so melissa tells the the dispatcher i don't know if he went inside
my house i don't know where he is and she started to run back to the house and the dispatcher's like
no don't go in the house yeah you know and she so she's on the phone and she's like i can see him i
can see him he's right outside my house and the dispatcher is like stay away police are on their way and then robert turns around and melissa yells to
the dispatcher oh my gosh he sees me he's coming right for me oh my god she's the 911 call is just
her screaming and he's he's clearly hitting her on this 911 call.
And then all of a sudden,
two police officers show up.
They pull Robert off of her.
They arrest him.
And they
What?
I don't love what they told Melissa, but made an impact on her okay what they say they said
um we don't want to see you again we don't want to be here again
women go back to the situation constantly don't be that woman okay yeah those those officers need some more training right
yes so they arrested robert and he was charged with battery um he was only held for like 10
hours he got out of the charges you know nothing really came of it except that that he was given a restraining order for Melissa, and that effectively ended
their relationship.
When the police got there and arrested him, Melissa made the police come with her to tell
her mom what had been going on, because she was so ashamed that she had let herself get
in this situation.
Oh, gosh. Yeah. No. Yeah. situation oh gosh yeah no yeah you didn't let
you didn't let yourself do anything no you were manipulated you were abused you did nothing wrong
it can happen to anyone it does happen to anyone yes it does it happens to anyone yeah yes she did
nothing wrong she had nothing to be ashamed of.
But, yes, she was so ashamed to tell her mother that she'd been in this situation.
So.
Well, sure, because it's so easy.
You know, you're just supposed to walk away.
Right.
Exactly.
You know, like the police say.
Absolutely.
Yeah.
Melissa said that that restraining order gave her just a fresh start a new life it was
like she was her old self again she was in school full time she was hanging out with her friends
she was doing everything she wanted to do um she was nearing her graduation i think she was in like
a two-year program maybe at that point okay and so she was nearing graduation they were planning a a backpacking trip through europe with her friends
for when they all graduated don't give me so much hope it was like she said it was like her life was
given back to her yes all of the stuff that had lost, all the stuff that she had been through because of that horrible relationship.
And so she celebrated her 20th birthday by going skydiving.
She was like, this is the new me.
I'm so happy to be back.
and then all of a sudden that new life was ripped out from under her it was january 24th 2012 melissa hadn't seen robert in like three months and he walked right through that restraining order? He began calling her obsessively over and over and over.
After three months of no contact?
I do not understand these people.
Three months of no contact.
What the fuck happened to you, dude?
All of a sudden, just calling her over and over and over again.
And so Melissa had kind of kept up with him on social media and saw that he was dating someone else.
So she's like, great.
You know, he's moved on.
I have my own life.
I'm through that.
I'm past it.
Finally, she answered the phone.
It was like three o'clock in the morning.
And he said that he had gone to court that day for that battery charge.
And it just brought up a bunch of old feelings and that he just needed
some closure from their relationship nope all he wanted was one last hug oh fuck oh we're both
doing creepy hug cases oh no closure is something you give yourself and melissa was like no leave me alone i have class in the morning yeah stop yeah robert began to cry and he said after everything we've been through
you can't just give me a hug no i cannot
i wish people could see my yeah oh i just bumped the mic that's good too
it's because my hands are, like, on my face.
And so Melissa's on the phone with him, and he's just, like, crying and begging for this one last hug.
And so finally she's like, I just want to be done.
I just want this to be over with.
And so she reluctantly agreed to come outside of her house and meet him at 3 o'clock in the morning for that one last hug.
Don't negotiate with a terrorist.
Seriously.
So she walked out of the house.
She says she remembers the night so well.
It was just, like, eerily quiet in the neighborhood.
There was no one around.
It seemed darker than usual.
And there was Robert standing outside of her house. And she went up to him. He didn't say a word. She didn't say a word. She put her arms out to hug him. He hugged her. And then she heard a click.
Oh, God.
And she didn't know what it was yeah
and then all of a sudden he was stabbing her oh oh god it was a switchblade it was a switchblade
oh fuck he's stabbing her in the head oh the neck god the face oh my god she said her mouth
began to fill with blood and so she knew she needed to run.
And so she tried to fight him off.
She heard her skull crack.
Oh, Jesus.
And then somehow she got away from him and she took off running.
But he tracked her down.
He pushed her down to the ground.
And he pulled out another knife, a bigger knife from somewhere.
And he just went nuts on her, just stabbing and stabbing and stabbing.
And then Melissa says she remembered seeing someone out of the corner of her eye.
There was a girl with a phone.
She knew that this girl had seen what was going on.
And she prayed that this girl was an angel and that she was calling 911.
And sure enough.
What are you about to tell me?
Sure enough, she did.
Oh, my God.
This mystery girl.
Yeah.
That happened to see this happen at 3 o'clock in the morning, called 911.
What happened to see this happen at three o'clock in the morning called 911.
And the she called and said, I just watched this guy murder a girl.
Oh, my God. The street.
I saw him kill her.
Yeah.
When Robert realized maybe that this girl had called 911 or perhaps when he thought that Melissa was dead, he got up and got in his car and took off.
Oh, Melissa laid there on the pavement she said her hair was soaked in blood like she'd just gotten out of the shower oh my god
she said she felt herself dying and that she prayed that her mom would not come outside and find her
the dispatch sent an officer immediately and when the officer pulled into the neighborhood
it was a female officer named melissa harris with the clearwater police department she said
it was approximately 3 18 she pulled into the neighborhood and she saw a figure crawling through the grass
on the side of the road and it was melissa oh she ran up to her she told her to lay down lay still
emergency crews were right behind her um the first paramedic on the scene said there was so much blood
he couldn't tell where she was injured or what form of injury it was. And so he just started feeling around her head to see where all of the blood was coming from.
And his finger literally slid inside her skull.
Oh, stop.
She had been stabbed 34 times.
Oh, my God.
And it had punctured her skull.
Ugh.
And her arms from her trying to defend herself were just mutilated.
Ugh.
Of course they were.
Melissa says from the time that the first responders got there to when she woke up in the hospital days later that memories of that are super foggy she remembers
them putting her in an ambulance and then saying that they needed a helicopter and she remembered
thinking at that moment that that meant that she was dying they only call in helicopters for people
that are about to die she also says that she remembers waking up in
the ambulance and asking them if it was heaven because it was so bright in the ambulance.
When she was sitting in the ambulance waiting for the life flight to get there, that first
police officer on the scene was talking to her and she was like, who did this to you?
And she said, the police officer thought she said Robbie M merton and so she's like merton and melissa gathered herself so much so
that she could correct her it was so important to get out the name of who did this to her and she
said no burton with a b and so they put out a beyond the lookout for Robert Burton. And Melissa was able to get out
that it was her ex-boyfriend. And then she told the police officer that she was really tired and
that she felt like she needed to go to sleep. No, no, no. And so, oh my gosh, this police officer
who was on the scene, they interview her on this episode of 48 Hours. And she is like choked up
when she's saying this. She's like, I thought in that moment that she was giving up and that i would
not let her do that and so she just kept talking to her and she just kept talking to her the the
paramedic or the another police officer had gone to the house by this point and uh rang the doorbell
and got her mom to come out and her her mom came to the door and was like what what's going on
and they were like it's melissa she's been stabbed we need to take you to her and she said as they
were walking she saw blood stains all over the street and she said she realized that they were
taking her to see her daughter before she died finally the helicopter gets there and this paramedic takes her from the ambulance to
the helicopter and he said his name was cameron and he said as he was loading her into the
helicopter he just had this feeling wash over him he knew she was going to live and he knew he was going to see her again.
More on that later. Okay. Was that secretly Miss Cleo? It was Miss Cleo.
They managed to track down Robert Burton. When they find him, he had run his car into a convenience store.
Cool.
And taken a bunch of sleeping pills in an attempt to end his life.
Hmm.
That hit the wheel, burned through the tire, and then the metal ground on the pavement so long that the wheel had lodged itself into, like halfway into the cement.
That's crazy.
It's crazy.
How long does that take?
I have no idea.
I saw a picture of it and I was like, how does that even happen?
Wow. happen wow meanwhile melissa has been rushed to bayfront health medical center and dr jeffrey
johnson is interviewed on this episode of 48 hours and he's the first person to to work on melissa
when she got there uh so this this medical center is in St. Petersburg. That's where they life flighted her to.
When she got there, she was essentially dead.
She had lost so much blood.
She had the faintest heart rate.
And they immediately started CPR and got her into surgery.
She flatlined twice while in surgery.
Holy crap.
And they resuscitated her.
Holy crap. Oh they resuscitated her. Holy crap.
Oh, my God.
They spent hours working on her to stop the bleeding, figure out if there was internal injuries.
She had a stroke because of all the bleeding during this.
three, four hours of ongoing resuscitation,
the doctor asked her to squeeze his finger.
And she did.
Oh, my God.
And he was like, I knew then she was going to be okay.
She spent 10 days in a coma in the ICU.
Yeah. And then she woke up the very first thing she did when she woke up
was ask for a piece of paper she couldn't speak because she had yeah you know tubes and everything
and she wrote on the piece of paper she wrote dead alive or in jail oh that's the very first
thing she asked good for her when she came to in the hospital.
And so the detectives were like right there in her room and they said that he was in custody, that he'd been charged with attempted first degree murder, and that they were going to see this thing through and make sure that he got the harshest punishment possible.
But Melissa couldn't focus on Robert just yet.
She had to ask that because she was terrified that any second he could walk into her room.
And so knowing that he was in custody, that was enough for the time being,
and she could focus on her recovery.
And she had a long road ahead of her.
34 stab wounds, arms just horribly mangled.
The stroke had left her body like half paralyzed.
Oh my gosh.
They told her that she would likely never walk again.
Yeah.
But Melissa was determined.
She had planned a trip, that trip to europe with her friends for graduation and she
was gonna do it she asked her doctor what the likelihood of her being able to go on that trip
was and he was like like honey hate to tell you i mean if you work really hard in physical therapy
i mean maybe that's all she needed to hear.
She needed to hear that there was a chance.
And so she worked her ass off in physical therapy.
Oh, this is amazing.
And three weeks after the attack, she walked out of the fucking hospital.
What?
No wheelchair, no walker, no cane.
She walked out of the hospital that is crazy crazy
oh we got a bottle whatever is in her that's amazing nuts right yes yes
and she did make it to europe she graduated on time oh yeah okay yeah she graduated on time she went to europe with her
friends and she says she just had this moment where she was standing in paris looking at the
eiffel tower she was with her friends and it was like at night and the eiffel tower was all lit up
and she just started crying and her friends were just kind of like laughing at her like oh my gosh
you're so lame and she's like, which is ridiculous.
Yes, exactly.
And she was like, and they were like, why are you crying?
And she said, I don't know, because I almost died like a month ago.
She said, I'm so happy.
Like, how am I here?
Do you realize that I was almost murdered?
And here I am in front of the Eiffel Tower.
Yes.
She said it showed her that she could really do anything.
I think she's amazing.
I think her friends are dumb.
Dumb, yeah.
But I think she is amazing.
And now she knew exactly what she wanted to do.
Kill Robbie.
Well, yeah.
Melissa said,
all I wanted to do
was get on that stand in court
and show him that I'm alive.
Here I am.
I'm beautiful
and you didn't win.
Yeah.
Oh.
So because of all of the injuries
to her face,
she's had up 10 plus facial reconstruction
and surgery.
She's had to have a weight put in her eyelid because it no longer opens and closes properly.
She's gorgeous.
She's beautiful.
And she's beautiful still after all of everything she's been through.
That's the most important thing.
It's not.
No, that's not what I'm saying.
No, I'm teasing.
Like, she is beautiful.
It was one year and one month after the attack
that Melissa got to face Robert Burton in court
for the first time.
Did you get to watch video?
No video.
Oh, damn it.
Oh, okay.
I'll accept it.
So this was kind of a preliminary hearing
where she had to talk about all of the things that led up to the attack to see if that information was going to be admissible at trial.
It better fucking be.
I would sure hope it is.
But, you know, there's always questions about it because it's all her word.
Nobody knew about any of it except for the one battery where he was actually arrested.
Right.
of it except for the one battery where he was actually arrested right and so she's up there talking about things that she's never told anyone ever she's never admitted to any of the things
and she said it was super hard and i can i can imagine how difficult that would be yeah
and she said she was sitting up there talking about all these horrible things and that he was just staring her down.
He wouldn't look away.
And so she said, okay, I'm just going to look right back at him.
And so she just stared him right in his eyes as she said every little thing that he had ever done to her.
And she said it totally changed everything for her.
It took the shame away and made her feel empowered.
Oh, love it.
Yeah.
Robert Burton would be held in jail for like two years
while this thing was working its way through the court system.
First, he tried to claim that he was incompetent to stand trial,
that he had been mentally ill, temporarily insane,
in a deep depression, yada, yada all that stuff the problem is i'm a huge murdering asshole so
exactly also i don't want to stay on trial um but none of that worked and so they were moving
forward with the trial they were in the jury selection phase.
And then all of a sudden, Robert got up and said, I can't go on trial.
What?
I'm guilty.
I'm guilty.
I'm pleading guilty.
I can't do this.
Wait, he said this in court?
In court.
And his attorney was like, shut the fuck up, dude.
Yeah.
And so it was done. You're done you're there would be no trial he changed his plea to guilty uh-huh all that would remain would be the
sentencing phase jail forever so it's attempted i know i know that doesn't carry the same. I know. That's so frustrating to me because she only lived because of her and because someone else intervened.
Yeah, I'm so sorry she survived.
Yeah.
Yeah, that's ridiculous.
At the sentencing, Melissa did take the stand and deliver an impact statement, a victim impact statement.
Yeah.
She said, Your Honor, I pleaded and begged for Robert to stop.
I didn't get a chance to walk away with 10 or 20 stab wounds.
It wasn't until he believed I was finally dead and that my life was taken that he stopped.
Yeah.
I believe the only justice in return is a life sentence.
I only came here with one thing to tell Robert.
And it's that I forgive him.
Wow.
She stood up there and she told him that she,
she said, Robert, I forgive you for coming to my house
and attempting to murder me.
Wow.
Yeah.
She said she learned in all of her therapy and recovery.
She spoke with someone who had been through something that was very similar to her.
This woman had been attacked by her estranged husband.
And that woman said that it had given her the power back of her life to forgive her abuser.
And so she decided that that's what she was going to do. And she said it was. It was just like a weight lifted off of her life to forgive her abuser. And so she decided that that's what she was going to do.
And she said it was, it was just like a weight lifted off of her. That is amazing. What is her
podcast? That is so crazy. She stood up there at his sentencing and said, I forgive you.
She said, I had to show him that he truly had no hold on me yeah and that when i walked out
of that courtroom i was letting go of him i was letting go of the memories i was letting go of
the pain i was letting go of the hatred everything you can keep it all oh that's so good yeah oh
that's so good yeah and what better revenge honestly yeah he's fucking obsessed with her yeah
yeah and to say you don't matter anymore i'm done yeah oh at the sentencing this is what the judge
said to robert burton he said what drove you that night to go to her house and do what you did will never leave you it's a part of you and because of
that i'm giving you the maximum sentence yes i'm sentencing you to life in prison whoa yes
i couldn't believe that was even a possibility i mean either i really didn't think i didn't think
that murder i didn't think that would be a possibility love it yeah he was sentenced to life in prison all right feeling
really good okay so you remember that first responder that i talked to you about the one that
helped her from the took her from the ambulance to the helicopter he said he just had this feeling right he was gonna see her again his name was cameron hill and 10 months after the attack melissa did a speaking engagement
where she oh my god they fell in love got together all of the people that had been in love oh my god
all of the people that had been there as part of her recovery all the people that had saved her
life all of the doctors that had been a part of it everybody who had been as part of her recovery all the people that had saved her life all of the
doctors that had been a part of it everybody who had been a part of her journey she did this um
this speech in front of all of them and cameron was one of the people that was there this is the
best case ever i love this and so they got to talking at this event. And he asked to like friend her on Facebook.
All of a sudden they're like.
That's how Norman and I started.
He friended me on Facebook.
All of a sudden they're exchanging messages on Facebook.
And he invites her out to the fire station.
She brings her mom to the fire station with her.
She bakes cupcakes and comes.
He gives her a tour.
She tries on his whole suit and everything.
Oh my God.
And then he asks her out on a real on his whole suit and everything and then he asks
her out on a real date and they start dating oh my god where was their first date oh i don't know
make something up it was at a beautiful park they went and watched the sunset i'm sorry okay
i'm more of a nice restaurant yeah maybe okay and then like two years after the attack melissa was invited to throw out a
ceremonial first pitch at the tampa bay rays baseball game so she did and then cameron was
there and on the jumbotron it said will you marry me he was her catcher and he knelt and he posed her right there on the field oh my god i love it today they
are married i love it i love it yes it's the best story ever oh my god that is so uplifting you and
i are both clutching our hearts right now yes so melissa and and Cameron are in love and married. Melissa does speaking
engagements about the importance of recognizing abuse and knowing that nothing is your fault.
She also does fundraisers for this charity that covers the costs of reconstructive surgeries for victims like her all of her facial
reconstructive surgeries were paid for by this this charity so she does work for them yeah it's
and she calls herself a sir thriver okay that's a little cheesy i love love it. I love it. No, it's good. It's good. Yes. And that's one hell of a story of survival.
That was amazing.
Yes.
I loved every bit of it.
Yeah.
I loved that he is in prison for life.
Yeah.
No parole, right?
And probably parole.
Just tell me.
No, forever.
Yeah.
Forever and ever.
Yes.
Great.
Threw away the key.
Forever and ever.
Amen.
Amen.
Oh, my God. That was so good. ever. Yes. Great. Threw away the key. Forever and ever. Amen. Amen. Oh my God, that was so good.
Yeah.
Ugh, finally.
Ugh.
An uplifting story.
Domestic violence.
Ugh.
It blows.
It gets to me.
And I really, I mean, I hate it all the time, but I really hate it when someone's that young.
Because like, when you're that young, especially, it's so hard to see red flags you're not used to oh my god aren't they so cute they're so cute and is
that their dog yes oh my gosh yeah yeah they're adorable super cute oh fucking robbie no i haven't forgiven robbie no i'm keeping some of the bitterness okay that was
that was fantastic yeah loved it yes um i've been thinking we had people ask dp questions
we didn't get to all of them yeah but there were some extra ones so i thought maybe we
could go through a few absolutely let. Let's answer some questions.
Oh, man.
There are so many good questions.
Someone wants to know what my dad's first thoughts on Norm were when he met him.
Ooh.
Can I tell my first thoughts on Norm?
Yes.
Oh, my God.
Very specific first thoughts on Norm.
Oh, my God.
Yes.
Should we get him in here for this or no?
Is it better to say it behind his back?
I mean, here, I've already said it to his face, so it doesn't matter, right?
Yeah.
Spill it.
Spill it.
Oh my gosh.
I thought Norm like was too cool for school the first time we met him.
He was like kind of quiet and like, but at one point we were sitting all at a table and
like he made this point to like scratch his arm and kind of show off his tattoo a
little bit.
And I was like, okay, this guy thinks he's so fucking cool and like too cool to be hanging
out at this like fun little dinner right now.
I don't think that about Norm at all now, but he was just very quiet and like seemed
disinterested in the entertainment.
The whole thing.
The whole thing.
Yes.
Okay.
You know him very well now.
Yeah.
Looking back, what do you think was going on there?
I think it was new people and he was just kind of shy.
Yeah.
Yes.
That's totally it.
Yeah.
Yeah.
So when Norm is in a group with new people,
I feel like sometimes he does get shy uh-huh and how do i hmm
i don't know it just it can come across as kind of douchey yeah yeah yeah i thought he was a super
douche you thought he was a super douche i didn't think that it only took her six months to decide he wasn't
what was your first impression of norm the first time you met him
you thought oh i like that 12 year old boy a little bit you guys there's a picture of
christian and norm from when they very first met and Norm looks like a 12 year old boy. He had a baby face
for like the first
I'm going to say
the first three years
that we dated.
He had a baby face.
He looked so young
in that picture.
Yes.
Yes.
No, I
I thought he was hilarious.
I thought he was
absolutely hilarious
and very, very different.
Yeah.
Which both things were true. True, yeah. Also, I thought he was absolutely hilarious and very, very different. Yeah. Which both things were true.
True, yeah.
Also, I thought he was a super douche.
No, I think the part of the super doucheness comes in when, like, you know, he's got this YouTube show.
Yeah.
Like, he's doing well.
Well, but he doesn't like to talk about it.
He's super modest about it.
And so, like, that can come off. Like, if you don't know that he's very genuinely that way yes could come off douchey
i think you're exactly right because like if you try to discuss it with him yeah he's going to
try to change the subject very much so actually you know what he's not even gonna do that he's
gonna give you like one word answers and then look awkwardly at the floor. Yes, exactly. So it looks like, oh boy, here this boring little person is asking me about my exciting
career on YouTube.
Yes.
No, but it's just that he's so modest about it.
Yes, genuinely modest.
Okay.
I have this very specific memory of there was this one time I was at a restaurant and
I was telling someone it was before
we even started the podcast is when we're talking about starting the podcast yeah and we talked
about it for a long time yeah so we're talking about starting the podcast and um whoever I was
talking to was asking me about you and norm and and I was like well norm knows a lot of the behind
the scenes stuff because of his youtube channel and and i was explaining that to them and people at the table behind that us turn around they're like um excuse me did you
just say the gaming historian and i was like yes and they're like oh we are huge fans of the gaming
historian that is crazy you know him that is crazy and i was like yes i know him? That is crazy. And I was like, yes, I know him.
Yes, I am also cool.
And so then the next time I saw Norm, I was like, oh my goodness, the Gammie is still in.
Like, I made this big deal.
And I told him the story.
And he was just like embarrassed by it because he's so modest.
So on that note, yeah.
My favorite thing to do.
You know, I pick him up from the airport a lot obviously my new favorite thing because you know i drive the car up to the curb at kci and
he's always looking at his phone so my favorite thing to do is roll down the passenger side window and go oh my god it's the gaming historian
gets a laugh out of him never never he has never laughed but he hates that i laugh every time
oh eleanor wants to know who do you think would win in a fight kristin or brandy i hope people
aren't mad that we're taking questions for my dad and giving them to us.
But who do I think is fine?
Who would win?
Are we talking about like a physical fight or a debate?
If it's a debate, you would win.
If it's a physical fight, I mean, I'm just bigger than you, so I'd probably win, right?
I don't know.
There's only one way to find out.
We fight to the death.
Once we get a thousand people on Patreon, then we fight to the death. Once we get a thousand people on Patreon, then we fight to the death.
Whoever survives gets to host the podcast solo.
Akash wants to know, what really grinds your gears right now, DP?
Well, I can tell you what is grinding his gears right now.
Yeah, I can too.
I cut so many.
Okay.
Obviously, anytime we have a guest on the podcast, that episode is going to run pretty long.
So there's just more stuff to cut out.
With my dad on, I mean, that man, he calls it a Seinfeld reference, but it's really an episode retelling.
Yes.
Do you remember the episode where...
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
And it just goes on and on forever.
You know what it reminds me of?
That Chris Farley thing.
Do you remember when Chris Farley had this sketch on SNL where it was just him as a talk show host.
And he was just like, do you remember that?
Yeah.
And that was it.
There was no question.
There was nothing out.
It was just like, do you remember that yeah and that was it there was no question there was nothing out it was just like do you remember so my dad is devastated that i cut that hang on let's see
if he's responded to me pause for my phone to load okay okay so yeah my dad texted me what
happened to my four seinfeld references dp is is getting angry. And I said, they were lame. So then he said, and I think this is very uncharacteristic and sketchy. He goes,
okay, you did a great job on the editing. Oh, is Sheree Ray involved? Yeah, so I wrote back,
did mom make you say this? And he just said, he, he, he. That's a yes.
That is, my mom said, you know, they work very hard on that podcast.
Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah.
Ooh.
So Andrea wanted to know, what's your favorite Brandy, Kristen, long-term friend story?
What story would you tell to illustrate their friendship?
Do you have a story that illustrates our friendship?
I feel like the last time we were asked this question we just answered embarrassing questions
about each other
I know
gosh I don't know we've been friends for so long
I know too damn long
I mean really
what's the expiration date on this
consider wrapping this up
well if we fight to the death,
that's right. Yeah, hurry up.
Subscribe to our Patreon, and
let's hurry that thing up.
Here's the thing.
I'm thinking with the fight to the death,
like, you're probably
stronger than me, but I feel like I could run away
from you. No, you would absolutely run away from me.
This fight would last for forever.
It would last so long. It could last for years of me just seeing you and then taking off running. Yeah, you would absolutely run away from me. This fight would last for forever. It would last so long. It could last for years
of me just seeing you and then taking off
running. Yeah, you're exactly right.
I'd be like, is she still at my house?
That bitch is in my
recliner.
Listen, Kristen,
I don't want to fight to the death with you.
No, I don't want to fight to the death with
you either. Or am I going to find a new
long-term friend? Way too much time invested in this friendship.
Absolutely.
It's just not even possible.
Possible as in like we don't have the personalities to get new friends?
Yeah, exactly.
Oh, my gosh.
I'm going to vet somebody and find out if they're worth the time.
What do you look for in a friend
um blonde topless topless yeah that's a road trip reference oh okay
i thought that was a comment about my top
you guys i'm wearing a real cute dress i I remember Beth asks, what's his butt?
Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.
What he looks for in a girl.
And he's like, she should be blonde and topless.
Do you have a good story about our friendship?
No good stories.
No, let me think.
Let me think.
Yeah, I can't think of anything.
Yeah, I guess it's not that good of a friendship.
Guess it kind of sucks.
No, I mean, I just think that's too hard a question.
It is.
It's way too hard of a question.
Yeah.
Can't handle it.
No.
I can't go through all of the files of our entire friendship.
We have many files.
There's way too many files.
We haven't digitized shit.
No.
I have a photo.
I think I've told you this a photo of you i just i found it the other day of your entire fist in your mouth
listen i have a giant mouth kristen and a tiny fist i have a baby fist and a giant mouth. Frankly, there's room to spare.
It's very roomy.
No, I think, so it was, this photo was taken in the car.
We were on a road trip.
And I feel like I remember you saying you could fit your fist in your hand.
And we were all like, no, you can't.
Fist in my hand?
Is that what I said?
Yeah.
It can't be done. I think I can still do it. Do it. my hand? Is that what I said? Yeah. You know what you can't be doing?
I think I can still do it.
Do it.
You want me to do it right now?
Yeah.
Oh, this is going to be disgusting.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my God.
She's got a...
Oh, my God.
Ew.
Ew.
You guys, her fingers disappeared in no time i have a giant mouth okay
that's why my voice is so loud she's echoey in there it's like a canyon like a giant canyon
oh my god i remember one time i was like i don't even know what i was doing and i like i must have like
i don't know i was making some point and i oh like job like did like a jaw drop and my mom was like looked at me and she goes oh my gosh your mouth is so big she was just like horrified
by the size of my mouth how are you my mom can daughter? My mom cleans my teeth, so she's been in that mouth a lot.
I mean, probably a lap of luxury cleaning your teeth, right?
Just so roomy.
You get both hands and all kinds of instruments in there.
Here's the test.
When you go to get your teeth cleaned, do they ever have to tell you, open wider?
Oh, no.
Okay, well, yeah, you got a big mouth. Never. get your teeth cleaned do they ever have to tell you open wider oh no okay well yeah you know big
mouth never i also have an extremely mobile bottom jaw don't tell us about your sex life
okay wildly inappropriate no i have this like bite guard i have to wear um that i don't wear
but i'm supposed to wear because i i grit my teeth when i say guard is
that like legends of the hidden temple it's not it's it like clips onto my forefront teeth
it's not like a big plastic like wrestler one okay no but like um it's got this little thing
on the end of it to keep you from being able to move your jaw around it. That sounds like a pain in the ass.
Yeah, I don't wear it because of it.
And so when I got it in, my dentist was like, this is the longest end I've ever seen on one of these.
How much can you move your jaw?
And so I showed him and he's like, what the hell?
Because they do like a couple, they figure, I don't know.
There's a whole science to how they figure out how wide that thing has to be to keep you from being able to move around it.
Yeah.
I've got a crazy mouth.
Well, congratulations.
Thank you.
Uh-huh.
I'm glad we've talked for 20 minutes about how big my mouth is now.
Should we do Supreme Court inductions?
Oh, you know we should.
Guys, this time, okay, I'm loving this.
We've changed up the question.
Last time we were asking people for their favorite word.
This time, least favorite word.
I'm just, are we just going to say moist a bunch of times?
That's what I thought.
Moist is the first one.
Oh, excellent.
But people found some ones that I hate.
Really?
Yes, I was like, yes you do you want to say yours
the words that i hate the most yeah do you want to give one panties oh i also i also hate that
you know what i say instead of panties underpants underpants that's exactly what i said i don't know
why panties they always sound creepy that sounds filthy and creepy yeah it does mucus
it gives me a physical reaction yeah i can tell i can tell that you almost threw up everywhere
which is funny because my dad's word that he submitted is not that different than yeah don't
don't spoil it okay okay if you guys if you're wondering how you could join the Supreme Court
and get inducted on a future episode, Kristen's about to tell you how.
Join us at patreon.com slash lgtcpodcast.
If you join at the Supreme Court level, you get a sticker,
you get access to the Discord where we're talking all day, talking all night.
You get bonus episodes.
You get inducted. You get inducted.
You get to vote on topics.
So much stuff.
So many things.
It's amazing.
So for today's inductions, I would like everybody to please have a seat.
Wow, what a letdown.
I usually tell people to stand.
I know.
Destiny Philpott.
Moist.
Eleanor Donahue.
Equidistant.
Oh, I like that word.
Geneva Waite.
Supple.
Oh, I don't like it.
Steven.
Fiery one.
Demeter.
Defeat.
Like, what's up with defeat?
You should have buttered me up for that one
yeah
everyone in the discord will get that
because
well we don't need to tell all of
Steven's business
yeah that's the secrets of our discord
Kira Kiki Newell
oh my god
oh my gosh this is so funny Kira Kiki Newell. Oh my God.
Oh my God, this is so funny.
She says, this is my least favorite word simply because I pronounced it Beignet for the longest time. The actual item is delicious and it is beignet.
Okay.
That is hilarious.
For the rest of my life, I am going to see beignets and think, beige neck.
Liz M.
It's a tie between hubby and potty.
Oh, I say hubby sarcastically.
Yeah, those are both kind of way too cutesy.
Tim Pounds.
That's my dad.
Aw.
His least favorite word is puss.
Ew.
Which is not that different from mucus, so.
I don't know.
It's different from him.
The puss or the mucus.
Ew, girls.
Marissa.
Thruple.
Ooh.
Katina.
Oh, God.
Panties.
Oh, this was just disgusting. Oh, God. Panties. Oh, this was just disgusting.
So bad.
Welcome to the Supreme Court.
Oh, my God.
Oh, my gosh.
That?
That was gross, but fun.
It is fun.
It's super fun.
I can't wait to do more of those.
Guys, thank you so much for your support.
If you're looking for other ways to support us, find us on social media.
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apple podcast now yeah it's called apple podcast now they're changing things up been called that
for a long time we're just slow on the uptake whatever it still says itunes on my computer
because i haven't updated okay head on. Head on over to Apple Podcasts
and leave us a rating,
leave us a review,
and, you know,
then be sure to join us
next week.
When we'll be experts
on two whole new topics.
Podcast adjourned.
And now for a note
about our process.
I read a bunch of stuff,
then regurgitate it
all back up
in my very limited vocabulary.
And I copy and paste from the best sources on the web, and sometimes Wikipedia.
So we owe a huge thank you to the real experts.
For this episode, I got my info from the Associated Press, the Connecticut Post, the New York Post, Snopes, and Fox 4.
And I got my info from the 48 hours episode Live to Tell One
Last Hug. People Magazine, CBS News and BBC News. For a full list of our sources
visit lgtcpodcast.com. Any errors are of course ours but please don't take our
word for it go read their stuff.