Let's Go To Court! - 84: A Big Hug & An Incredible Story of Survival

Episode Date: August 28, 2019

It was Sean Tarala’s eighth birthday party, and man was he excited. He’d just gotten a new red bike! He was gonna eat cake! And then, just when life couldn’t get any better, his aunt, Jennifer C...onnell, showed up. “Auntie Jen! Auntie Jen!” he shouted. He ran to her. He lept into her arms. But Jennifer wasn’t prepared for such an exuberant hug. The pair tumbled to the ground. Jennifer experienced immediate pain in her wrist. So what did she do? She sued her nephew for $127k. You’ll want to hear the whole story. This one has a twist ending.  Then Brandi tells us an incredible story of survival. Robert Lee Burton was a controlling, abusive boyfriend. Following a violent attack, Melissa Dohme got a restraining order against Robert. That restraining order effectively ended their relationship. Melissa felt like a new woman. She felt free. But Robert didn’t want to let her go. He called her and called her. He begged her for closure. He said he wanted one last hug. Melissa said okay. And now for a note about our process. For each episode, Kristin reads a bunch of articles, then spits them back out in her very limited vocabulary. Brandi copies and pastes from the best sources on the web. And sometimes Wikipedia. (No shade, Wikipedia. We love you.) We owe a huge debt of gratitude to the real experts who covered these cases. In this episode, Kristin pulled from: “Aunt who sued nephew for $127k says she’s not after money,” by Chris Perez for the New York Post “‘She loves us’: Nephew speaks out on aunt’s hug injury lawsuit,” Tribune Media Wire “8-year-old Westport boy on trial for exuberance,” by Daniel Tepfer for the Connecticut Post “Woman loses lawsuit against nephew over ‘exuberant hug,’” by Kim Lacapria for Snopes In this episode, Brandi pulled from: “Live to Tell: One Last Hug” 48 Hours episode “48 Hours: Dating violence survivor tells story” by Melissa Dohme, CBS News “Marrying the man who saved my life” BBC News Magazine “Domestic Abuse Survivor Finds Happily Ever After with First Responder Who Saved Her Life: ‘He Loved Me Through It All’” by Rose Minutaglio, People Magazine

Transcript
Discussion (0)
Starting point is 00:00:00 One semester of law school. One semester of criminal justice. Two experts. I'm Kristen Caruso. I'm Brandi Egan. Let's go to court. On this episode, I'll talk about an exuberant hug. And I'll be talking about an incredible story of survival.
Starting point is 00:00:18 Oh God, someone went through something horrible. They survived. Okay, well I'm glad. I i mean that's rare for your cases i'm telling you though um in my research of this case i cried several times so i hope i can get through it right well my case is light oh good so it's about hugs by the way i hope you guys enjoyed last week's episode featuring d. You've been DP'd! Don't they know it. I literally just got
Starting point is 00:00:50 a text from him. He's very upset because he made four lengthy Seinfeld references and I cut all of them. And I'm not apologizing for it. Here's the deal, DP, because I know you're listening.
Starting point is 00:01:06 Seinfeld references, not your best material. But that line about the kids being sleuths. Good stuff. Also, the Jesus fetus line. Oh, Jesus fetus. He had some good lines. But when he's saying, hey, remember that episode of Seinfeld. Not your best material.
Starting point is 00:01:27 It's not his material all right are you ready so ready to talk about a hug it was march 18th 2011 we're at are you ready 25 yeah yeah no i was not ready i wasn't picking up the cues at all. I flailed my hands out. Okay, I'm ready now. We're at 25 Woods Grove Road, Westport, Connecticut. Ooh. Is this? Cute, right? Hold on.
Starting point is 00:02:01 Wait, I'm at 25. Is it 25 or 24? 25. It's so cute. Adorable. Wait, I'm at 25. Is it 25 or 24? 25. Oh, 25. It's so cute. Adorable. Okay, so pictures. It's Sean Torella's eighth birthday party. And he's so excited.
Starting point is 00:02:14 Yay! For his birthday, he got a brand new red bike. Excellent. Not a trike. He was done with tricycles. He had a bicycle. Excellent. Okay? Okay. He's pumped. He's so excited. He was done with tricycles. He had a bicycle. Okay?
Starting point is 00:02:25 Okay. He's pumped. He's so excited. He's riding all over the place. And then he saw his aunt, Jennifer Connell. And he was double excited because his auntie came to his birthday party. So he dropped the new bike to the ground and he ran toward her shouting auntie chin auntie chin and when he got close enough he yelled auntie chin i love you and he leapt into her arms
Starting point is 00:02:55 excellent what what's gonna happen you look like you want to be happy but you're not letting yourself i want to be happy so bad but i'm something's bad's gonna happen he's gonna break her back and she's gonna sue the family for lost wages as a stripper because she can't do her signature move anymore what was her signature uh the bulldog thing oh, what's a bulldog? Don't you remember that? No, what are you talking about? You know. No, I don't. No, I don't.
Starting point is 00:03:31 When we were in the 8th grade, it became this thing that everyone was trying to do this stupid dance move called the bulldog. You literally get on all fours and you cross your... Oh, I do remember that. Yes! I'm sure we looked really cool doing that. I'm sure we looked really cool doing that. I'm sure we did.
Starting point is 00:03:50 So, Jennifer wasn't prepared for the run and jump hug. She tried to catch him, but they both tumbled onto the ground. Pretty immediately. Sorry, Brady. I'm sorry. She experienced pain in her wrists but she didn't say anything because it was sean's birthday party and she didn't want to ruin the mood she uh related to sean's mom or dad you know i don't know and technically he was the son of a cousin but he called Not really an aunt.
Starting point is 00:04:25 But you know, they called. Okay, okay. So she suffers in silence and then she got back home to Manhattan and the pain didn't go away. To make matters worse, she lived in a third floor walk-up
Starting point is 00:04:42 so she constantly had to carry things upstairs and with one injured wrist, that kind of sucked. What? Okay. Well, that's lame. I'm going to run and jump hug at you. And I will catch you, Kristen.
Starting point is 00:04:58 I'll have the time of my life. I'll catch you, and I will lift you over my head. Do you think you really could? No, get you and I will lift you over my head. Do you think you really could? No, probably not. I do lift Cameron over my head, though. How dare you? Cameron is my nine-year-old niece. Is she five foot nine and several pounds?
Starting point is 00:05:19 If so, we could make this happen. So, no, but she likes me to pick her up and then see if I can lift her over my head. And can you? Yeah. Okay. Okay. I asked her how much she weighed. I don't really have any ideas. She told me she thinks she weighs 50 pounds. I have no idea if that's accurate or not. That doesn't seem right for a nine-year-old. How much does a nine-year-old weigh? Well, I don't really know, but it seems like she'd be more like 80 at that point right no i could lift her over my head so i think that means i'm strong okay you have been looking very veiny lately that's a serious compliment so she constantly had to carry these things upstairs and even though brandy doesn't give a shit wow brandy okay i'm just saying if it was her ankle all right yes that
Starting point is 00:06:06 would suck very much it's not you're walking up the stairs on your hands but okay she's living in manhattan she's gotta get groceries and you can't carry all your groceries in your good arm and just have your other one a dangling you know all right Plus, later, you ready to really cry for her? She went to a party. And it was difficult for her to hold her hors d'oeuvre plate. Okay. What? Is she for real?
Starting point is 00:06:39 She's very for real. And, you know, you load that thing up with stuffed mushrooms. It's whore's divorce. Her wrist was broken. Well, I do feel bad for her. That sucks. Yeah, all right. Finally some sympathy.
Starting point is 00:06:56 I mean, that would hurt whether you, I feel like a break, right? That hurts all the time, whether you're using your wrist or not. Right. So I think you and I both agree that this eight-year-old is an asshole. No, that we do not agree about. She's suing an eight-year-old? Well, hold the phone. Just hang on.
Starting point is 00:07:11 What was she to do, I ask you? Pay her medical bills. It was just an accident. Whoa. Go to the doctor. Get a cast. Well. Probably have to have some physical therapy.
Starting point is 00:07:23 Forgive her eight-year-old nephew. Well, okay. Or, and I'm just saying, maybe she could just look her little nephew in his loving eyes and say, Let's go to court! No! Jennifer sued Sean for $127,000. He's eight! But he was loaded No he wasn't
Starting point is 00:07:50 He just got that bright red new bike So you're probably thinking Well there's no way this went to trial They had to settle this case You're wrong This went to trial? Yes. Yes.
Starting point is 00:08:07 Why did I say trial like that? Trial? Trial? You just learned the word trial. Welcome to our court podcast. So in October of 2015, when Sean was 12 years old, his trial began. Jennifer's legal argument was simple. That eight-year-old boy had been negligent and careless when he gave her that forceful greeting. Any reasonable eight-year-old
Starting point is 00:08:39 knows or should know that when they greet someone in such a forceful manner that they could cause the type of injury or harm that jennifer suffered so ridiculous no no no any reasonable eight exactly exactly so i'm gonna pause here for a quick little legal caveat, because at first I was like, can you really sue a kid for hugging you? I mean, that seems kind of crazy. But minors can be held liable for injuries that they inflict negligently. Which again, but anyway, bottom line is you don't get off scot-free just because you're a kid. But you're obviously not held to the same standard as an adult either.
Starting point is 00:09:23 But you're obviously not held to the same standard as an adult either. So the court looks at the child's age, their experience, their judgment, and then they determine from there what expectations are appropriate for that child. Back to the trial. This is some bullshit, is what this is. Why? It's an eight-year-old kid who was fucking excited to see you. Yeah. And he gave you a running hug into your arms because
Starting point is 00:09:47 he's so excited it's his birthday and you came and you're going to sue him so what what annoyed me about this is this is just the way kids hug yeah the other day. Okay. Literally last weekend, my niece, who is seven, came over to me. We were going to hug. I bent down to kiss her on the top of the head. And she gave me, like, a jump hug. Yeah. And head-butted you? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:10:16 Hurt like you would not believe. I could have sworn I had, like, rich lady lips. Like, they puffed out huge. And I was like, oh, God. And I was like, are you okay? And she's like yeah i'm fine yeah so i'm gonna sue her no you are not yeah 127 000 that's all i want i don't ask for much i've seen that kid's piggy bank she's got something in there
Starting point is 00:10:37 so jennifer who is an hr manager in manhattan told the six-member jury that she loves Sean, but he needs to be held accountable for what he did. Give you a hug? Yeah. A forceful greeting. That caused her to fall over and break her wrist? Yeah. Whose fault was that she didn't fall over on her own?
Starting point is 00:11:03 It's not a fault thing. It was an accident. Yeah, I completely agree. By this point, she'd had two surgeries on her wrist and it looked like she needed a third. So, I mean, this legitimately sucked. But, again, I don't think that's
Starting point is 00:11:21 that's not anybody's fault. No. She described what happened on that fateful day. She said, All of a sudden, he was there in the air. I had to catch him and we tumbled onto the ground. I remember him shouting, Auntie Jen, I love you.
Starting point is 00:11:38 And there he was, flying at me. Wow. How dare he love you? I'm sure that stopped. Right? Sean's lawyer. Teach you to love me. Like, what the hell?
Starting point is 00:11:53 Sean's lawyer was like, wow, can we chill? He told the jury that the only thing Sean was guilty of doing was, quote, trying to give his aunt a hug on his birthday. Quote, trying to give his aunt a hug on his birthday. Obviously, reporters covered this trial and everyone had an opinion on it. And everyone's opinion was pretty much the same. What kind of aunt sues their eight-year-old nephew over a hug? People were calling Jennifer the world's worst aunt and i love this one the auntie christ they were saying nasty things about her on social media hashtag aunt from hell was trending on twitter yeah to make matters even worse by the way I'm going back and forth as I always do between aunt and aunt.
Starting point is 00:12:46 Oh, yeah. Because you're half Midwest trash. Half fancy East Coaster. Half this happened in Connecticut, so I'm trying to be respectful. To make matters even worse, by the time this case went to court, Sean's mother had died. So here he was. What? Yeah, I know.
Starting point is 00:13:05 His mom dies and his aunt is suing him? Yeah. Yeah. So people were just like, my God, this lady is a total monster. Yes. At this point, Jennifer's lawyers were like, whoa, okay, we need to do some damage control. So they talked to the press. They said that Jennifer was never looking for money.
Starting point is 00:13:31 They said she had... Okay, Brandi, people can't hear that face you're making. Would you like to describe it? It kind of looks like Columbo. Yeah. It's like a... I don't know. I'm starting to put this together. Yeah, it seems like you were only
Starting point is 00:13:50 after money. You know what it also is? Huh. It's the face Chris Hansen makes when they're like, I was just coming to check on the girl. She said she was home alone and I was worried. I'm worried about her. So I brought these condoms.
Starting point is 00:14:05 These box of condoms. And beer, you know. Just in case. You should never show up empty handed. In case her mom was here. They said she had no choice in this matter. She had to sue Sean. No, she did not.
Starting point is 00:14:27 What was she supposed to do? To pay her medical bills like a normal person. I already said this. So get this. Jennifer's attorneys needed to do damage control. And here's what they said. Jennifer's insurance wasn't willing to cover her injury. So your suggestion about, like, just, you know, have your insurance pay for it doesn't work. According to Connecticut state law, anyone who files an injury claim on their insurance has to take the responsible party to court.
Starting point is 00:15:09 Really? That's what they're saying. There's no way that's true. Her attorneys prepared a statement for the media, and it read, She didn't want to do this any more than anyone else would, but her hand was forced by the insurance company. else would but her hand was forced by the insurance company they said from the start this was a case about one thing getting medical bills paid by homeowners insurance our client was never looking for money from her nephew or his family it was about the insurance industry and being forced to sue to get medical bills paid really Really? Is this true?
Starting point is 00:15:45 Are they making this up? I don't think they're making it up. I mean, I went through all these articles. There was never any counter argument. And I feel like if there was a counter argument, we would have seen it. Absolutely. Jennifer said that she wanted to get the money
Starting point is 00:15:58 from Sean's parents' homeowner's insurance, but she was advised that under Connecticut state law, she had to sue an individual she she truly said this is the last thing i wanted i didn't want to do this but she had these two surgeries she needed a third and her medical insurance was not going to pay for it okay all right maybe i'll take back some of my some of my some of my disdain for her. According to her attorneys before this trial, Jennifer had tried really hard to get her medical expenses covered by her own insurance.
Starting point is 00:16:35 But her insurance company had only offered her $1. $1? Mm-hmm. They're like that guy in the commercial with the fishing pole? I don't know what you're talking about. That's your dollar. They're like that guy in the commercial with the fishing pole. I don't know what you're talking about. I don't know what you're talking about. It's like a Geico commercial. I don't watch TV. I mostly just
Starting point is 00:16:54 do projects. You fast forward because you have a VCR. She doesn't like me. Yeah, yours is in the shop. Mine's still in the shop. No, so, okay. I have to admit, I was all pumped to do this evil yeah auntie case and like norman even came in when i was like halfway through with the research he's like what are you doing for tomorrow i was like oh man i've got this case about this evil
Starting point is 00:17:16 lady who sued her eight-year-old nephew because he hugged her oh my god she's such an asshole and i got to this part and i felt horrible for her horrible i mean she got dragged by everybody yeah that's nuts um so my grandpa actually so he has this dog that he walks like for miles every day okay and he's like my grandpa's like 86 years old 87 years old something like that okay yeah he takes he takes him for walks every day and they were walking in their neighborhood one day and there was a dog across the street that is always on a chain and it barks at his dog his dog's name is franklin barks at franklin every time they go by right well on this particular day it broke its chain and it came at them knocked my grandpa down
Starting point is 00:18:14 attacked franklin uh somebody passing by had to pull the dog off oh my gosh and franklin my grandpa ended up breaking his wrist yeah yeah uh franklin had to go get stitches was like my grandpa's stuff was all covered because of he he's on you know medicare and whatever sure but franklin's vet bills were like 300 and ended up he didn't have any puncture wounds everything was okay good yeah he still had to get some vet care. And so my grandpa talked to a lawyer, and they suggested that they sue the owner of the dog to get that. Because the woman wouldn't just, like, he went and talked to the owner and asked her to cover the vet bills. She wouldn't do it? She would not, no.
Starting point is 00:18:59 300 bucks? Are you kidding me? Yeah, she would not. And so he went and talked to a lawyer and and he was like yeah we can take her to court and you know likely her homeowner's insurance will cover the vet bills and probably more yeah and so he's been this has been going on for i think i want to say like a couple of years now oh my god finally just found out that she is a renter at the property and because the dog doesn't isn't owned by the owner of the property nothing you're kidding me he can't he can't get even his vet bills covered well and by this point
Starting point is 00:19:34 i'm sure he's spent enough on legal fees i think that he went through a lawyer who only collects if we win. That's right. If we don't collect, you don't pay. Wow. That sucks. Yeah, it does suck. Poor grandpa. I know. I know. But he's all recovered. Franklin's fine. Good. So,
Starting point is 00:19:59 that's all good. Will you post a picture of Franklin in the Discord? Ooh, I don't know if I have. I can get a picture of franklin in the discord oh i don't know if i have i can get a picture of franklin yes and your grandpa yes so they're at trial because they had to be at trial the whole thing was pretty quick obviously it's not like this was some big complicated case the jury deliberated for 25 minutes what do you think they decided wow gosh i'm actually kind of torn because I would think they would decide that. I can't remember the kid's name now.
Starting point is 00:20:34 Sean. Sean. Sean was not at fault. But if they hear this story about how it's the only way to get her medical bills paid. Maybe they will find him at fault. See, this is why I wish there was more coverage of the actual trial. Do they get to hear that? I don't know. I don't think so, though.
Starting point is 00:20:55 Because then I feel like the legal argument would be way different. I don't see why you would make this dumb argument about like, oh, well, a reasonable eight-year-old would have known blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Yeah, no. So they're going to find in Sean's favor. And they did unanimously. about like oh well a reasonable eight-year-old would have known blah blah blah blah yeah no so they're gonna find in in sean's favor and they did unanimously okay i think it would be different if they were able to hear sure the only reason i'm here is because i'm turning up my medical bills paid and this is what the state requires if i can see why that's not allowed in court yeah if they were able to get up and say this is stupid this is backward but i've
Starting point is 00:21:26 got 127 000 in medical bills or whatever yeah and someone needs to pay yeah so there you go my eight-year-old nephew should be the one this was the ruling that i think most people expected but what jennifer didn't seem prepared for was all of the social media attention she said it's amazing the power that the internet has that something can go viral completely out of context that's it yeah it would it would be and i'm i'm giving again the benefit of the doubt that what her attorney said was correct because i didn't find any evidence otherwise but if what they said was correct and she really had no other choice otherwise. But if what they said was correct and she really had no other choice in this, then this poor woman. This poor woman, seriously. She said,
Starting point is 00:22:10 I'm certainly not trying to retire to some villa in the south of France. I'm simply trying to pay off my medical bills. Oh my goodness. After the verdict came down, Jennifer and Sean went on the Today Show together. They wanted to tell the world that they really did love each other and that this lawsuit was basically a formality. It had been about insurance, not about ill will. Sean said, she would never do anything to hurt the family and myself. She loves us. I felt like everybody was saying stuff that they didn't know and that's the story of an exuberant hug that is so crazy how is that sad i completely had one view
Starting point is 00:22:57 of her i'm gonna be getting and then totally changed it i thought about mixing up the order a bit but i was like no no, I, I mean, because I remember this case. Do you remember this case? No. Okay, I remember it, and man, I was like, oh yeah, that evil lady. Oh, I'm gonna do a story about her. Oh, she sucks so much.
Starting point is 00:23:18 And no, she doesn't. She doesn't. She was just trying to get her medical bills paid, and this is what the state required. Yeah, the insurance industry sucks so much. Yeah. Which I totally believe. Well, yeah. I mean, I think that's the funniest thing is that I definitely know the insurance industry sucks. I don't know why I had to jump to her being awful. Right.
Starting point is 00:23:39 But yeah, that's that. Oh my gosh. Okay. I'm going to talk about a story of survival but it's gonna get real sad before it gets happy okay so i'm just warning you going in most stories of survivals do okay yeah yeah so it's gonna get dark and then it has a very happy ending. I promise. I'm just going to tell you that right off the bat. Does this involve children? And there are no children. Oh, OK. Well, yeah.
Starting point is 00:24:10 No, no children. No. And then the majority of this comes from a 48 hours episode. I'll wait to tell you the title of the episode until the outro, but I will tell you that 48 Hours does these episodes called Live to Tell. Okay. And this is a Live to Tell episode. Okay. I can tell you that since I've already told you it's a survival story. Wait, spoiler.
Starting point is 00:24:38 Melissa Dome and Robert Burton began dating when they were high school students in Clearwater, Florida. And things started out great. Robert was like this super tall ginger who was very charming. And Melissa was this really cute, sweet, petite little blonde. Very cute girl. Kind of an odd couple because he was so tall and she was so short. But Robert was super funny he was always bringing Melissa flowers pretty quickly the two were inseparable Melissa even went so far
Starting point is 00:25:14 as to describe their relationship as best friends while things were good Melissa also felt a lot of pressure and felt like she carried the weight of being fully responsible for Robert's happiness. He didn't really have anyone else. He'd had a tough childhood and difficulties with his parents' divorce. And then when his mom remarried, she'd kind of started over. She had a couple more kids with her new husband. And Robert. And these kids were the real kids.
Starting point is 00:25:48 And Robert all of a sudden felt like an outsider. Yeah. The redheaded stepchild, if you will. Because he's redheaded. Yeah, I get it. So Melissa and her mom went out of their way to make sure Robert felt accepted and at home at their house. As Melissa neared graduation, though, things in the relationship started to change. Melissa was focused on becoming a nurse, so she spent a lot of time volunteering at local hospitals.
Starting point is 00:26:19 In fact, she graduated high school with 600 volunteer hours, something that looks great on a college application but robert wasn't super happy about it because it meant time apart from each other i'm sorry what i just can't imagine telling someone i'm sorry you spend too much time volunteering you're also not an abusive boyfriend. Oh, that you know of. When Melissa began applying to colleges, Robert became super jealous and began downgrading Melissa any chance he got. He called her dumb. He said she'd never amount to anything. Your classic abusive behavior. Anything to make Melissa believe she needed him.
Starting point is 00:27:08 I'm so grossed out. Uh-huh. Okay. That she was nothing without him, would amount to nothing without him. Was he going to college? Oh, you know, I don't know. They didn't really mention it in my research.
Starting point is 00:27:23 I'm wondering if it was like, you're so dumb, you can only go to the colleges that I'm wondering if it was like, you're so dumb, you can only go to the colleges that I'm going to. Right, yeah. Melissa followed up with pretty much textbook behavior of someone who was being abused.
Starting point is 00:27:36 First, she denied that she was in an abusive relationship. She was like, that's not what's happening. He's just upset. Things are changing, you know, whatever. And then when she finally admitted to herself that's what was going on when he started hitting her and all that she hid it from everyone else yeah including her mom who she was super close to we have talked a bunch on this podcast about how the most dangerous time to be in an abusive relationship is when you are trying to leave it.
Starting point is 00:28:10 Yes. So anyone who's like new to the game and they're like, why doesn't she just leave? It's not that simple. It's not that simple. When you are trying to leave is when you are most likely to be murdered. And this proved to be absolutely true for Melissa. She tried to break things off with him. By this point, like they had been together for several years.
Starting point is 00:28:31 She's already off at college and things have just gotten worse. One day they're in her bedroom. She's going to college, but she's still living at home. And so they're in her bedroom one night and he puts his hands around her throat. Oh, God. And to the point that she almost passes out. And so she attempted to break things off multiple times, and each time she did, he either threatened to or attempted suicide.
Starting point is 00:28:55 Oh, God. Yeah. So he made multiple attempts at suicide. He threatened suicide. He threatened to kill her mother. Mm-hmm. And hurt the people that she loved if she left him. Yep.
Starting point is 00:29:09 And so she stayed. And the things in the relationship continued to escalate until one night in October of 2011. Something Melissa did somehow set Robert off. And all of a sudden he was punching her. He was pulling her hair and she just took off running. She grabbed her phone and she dialed 911 and she just kept running. And what year was this? This was 2011. Okay. Gotcha. Gotcha. So she's on the phone with, with the dispatcher and she's like he's gonna come after me he was beating me up like is somebody coming is somebody going to be here soon and then she got really worried because she had run away from her house and so she's like
Starting point is 00:29:58 he's gonna kill my mom oh my gosh i know he knows that i have run away and that i've called 9-1-1 he's gonna go in there and kill my mom yeah and so melissa tells the the dispatcher i don't know if he went inside my house i don't know where he is and she started to run back to the house and the dispatcher's like no don't go in the house yeah you know and she so she's on the phone and she's like i can see him i can see him he's right outside my house and the dispatcher is like stay away police are on their way and then robert turns around and melissa yells to the dispatcher oh my gosh he sees me he's coming right for me oh my god she's the 911 call is just her screaming and he's he's clearly hitting her on this 911 call. And then all of a sudden,
Starting point is 00:30:49 two police officers show up. They pull Robert off of her. They arrest him. And they What? I don't love what they told Melissa, but made an impact on her okay what they say they said um we don't want to see you again we don't want to be here again women go back to the situation constantly don't be that woman okay yeah those those officers need some more training right
Starting point is 00:31:27 yes so they arrested robert and he was charged with battery um he was only held for like 10 hours he got out of the charges you know nothing really came of it except that that he was given a restraining order for Melissa, and that effectively ended their relationship. When the police got there and arrested him, Melissa made the police come with her to tell her mom what had been going on, because she was so ashamed that she had let herself get in this situation. Oh, gosh. Yeah. No. Yeah. situation oh gosh yeah no yeah you didn't let you didn't let yourself do anything no you were manipulated you were abused you did nothing wrong
Starting point is 00:32:15 it can happen to anyone it does happen to anyone yes it does it happens to anyone yeah yes she did nothing wrong she had nothing to be ashamed of. But, yes, she was so ashamed to tell her mother that she'd been in this situation. So. Well, sure, because it's so easy. You know, you're just supposed to walk away. Right. Exactly.
Starting point is 00:32:38 You know, like the police say. Absolutely. Yeah. Melissa said that that restraining order gave her just a fresh start a new life it was like she was her old self again she was in school full time she was hanging out with her friends she was doing everything she wanted to do um she was nearing her graduation i think she was in like a two-year program maybe at that point okay and so she was nearing graduation they were planning a a backpacking trip through europe with her friends for when they all graduated don't give me so much hope it was like she said it was like her life was
Starting point is 00:33:22 given back to her yes all of the stuff that had lost, all the stuff that she had been through because of that horrible relationship. And so she celebrated her 20th birthday by going skydiving. She was like, this is the new me. I'm so happy to be back. and then all of a sudden that new life was ripped out from under her it was january 24th 2012 melissa hadn't seen robert in like three months and he walked right through that restraining order? He began calling her obsessively over and over and over. After three months of no contact? I do not understand these people. Three months of no contact.
Starting point is 00:34:14 What the fuck happened to you, dude? All of a sudden, just calling her over and over and over again. And so Melissa had kind of kept up with him on social media and saw that he was dating someone else. So she's like, great. You know, he's moved on. I have my own life. I'm through that. I'm past it.
Starting point is 00:34:32 Finally, she answered the phone. It was like three o'clock in the morning. And he said that he had gone to court that day for that battery charge. And it just brought up a bunch of old feelings and that he just needed some closure from their relationship nope all he wanted was one last hug oh fuck oh we're both doing creepy hug cases oh no closure is something you give yourself and melissa was like no leave me alone i have class in the morning yeah stop yeah robert began to cry and he said after everything we've been through you can't just give me a hug no i cannot i wish people could see my yeah oh i just bumped the mic that's good too
Starting point is 00:35:23 it's because my hands are, like, on my face. And so Melissa's on the phone with him, and he's just, like, crying and begging for this one last hug. And so finally she's like, I just want to be done. I just want this to be over with. And so she reluctantly agreed to come outside of her house and meet him at 3 o'clock in the morning for that one last hug. Don't negotiate with a terrorist. Seriously. So she walked out of the house.
Starting point is 00:35:54 She says she remembers the night so well. It was just, like, eerily quiet in the neighborhood. There was no one around. It seemed darker than usual. And there was Robert standing outside of her house. And she went up to him. He didn't say a word. She didn't say a word. She put her arms out to hug him. He hugged her. And then she heard a click. Oh, God. And she didn't know what it was yeah and then all of a sudden he was stabbing her oh oh god it was a switchblade it was a switchblade
Starting point is 00:36:33 oh fuck he's stabbing her in the head oh the neck god the face oh my god she said her mouth began to fill with blood and so she knew she needed to run. And so she tried to fight him off. She heard her skull crack. Oh, Jesus. And then somehow she got away from him and she took off running. But he tracked her down. He pushed her down to the ground.
Starting point is 00:37:02 And he pulled out another knife, a bigger knife from somewhere. And he just went nuts on her, just stabbing and stabbing and stabbing. And then Melissa says she remembered seeing someone out of the corner of her eye. There was a girl with a phone. She knew that this girl had seen what was going on. And she prayed that this girl was an angel and that she was calling 911. And sure enough. What are you about to tell me?
Starting point is 00:37:34 Sure enough, she did. Oh, my God. This mystery girl. Yeah. That happened to see this happen at 3 o'clock in the morning, called 911. What happened to see this happen at three o'clock in the morning called 911. And the she called and said, I just watched this guy murder a girl. Oh, my God. The street.
Starting point is 00:37:52 I saw him kill her. Yeah. When Robert realized maybe that this girl had called 911 or perhaps when he thought that Melissa was dead, he got up and got in his car and took off. Oh, Melissa laid there on the pavement she said her hair was soaked in blood like she'd just gotten out of the shower oh my god she said she felt herself dying and that she prayed that her mom would not come outside and find her the dispatch sent an officer immediately and when the officer pulled into the neighborhood it was a female officer named melissa harris with the clearwater police department she said it was approximately 3 18 she pulled into the neighborhood and she saw a figure crawling through the grass
Starting point is 00:38:45 on the side of the road and it was melissa oh she ran up to her she told her to lay down lay still emergency crews were right behind her um the first paramedic on the scene said there was so much blood he couldn't tell where she was injured or what form of injury it was. And so he just started feeling around her head to see where all of the blood was coming from. And his finger literally slid inside her skull. Oh, stop. She had been stabbed 34 times. Oh, my God. And it had punctured her skull.
Starting point is 00:39:23 Ugh. And her arms from her trying to defend herself were just mutilated. Ugh. Of course they were. Melissa says from the time that the first responders got there to when she woke up in the hospital days later that memories of that are super foggy she remembers them putting her in an ambulance and then saying that they needed a helicopter and she remembered thinking at that moment that that meant that she was dying they only call in helicopters for people that are about to die she also says that she remembers waking up in
Starting point is 00:40:05 the ambulance and asking them if it was heaven because it was so bright in the ambulance. When she was sitting in the ambulance waiting for the life flight to get there, that first police officer on the scene was talking to her and she was like, who did this to you? And she said, the police officer thought she said Robbie M merton and so she's like merton and melissa gathered herself so much so that she could correct her it was so important to get out the name of who did this to her and she said no burton with a b and so they put out a beyond the lookout for Robert Burton. And Melissa was able to get out that it was her ex-boyfriend. And then she told the police officer that she was really tired and that she felt like she needed to go to sleep. No, no, no. And so, oh my gosh, this police officer
Starting point is 00:40:59 who was on the scene, they interview her on this episode of 48 Hours. And she is like choked up when she's saying this. She's like, I thought in that moment that she was giving up and that i would not let her do that and so she just kept talking to her and she just kept talking to her the the paramedic or the another police officer had gone to the house by this point and uh rang the doorbell and got her mom to come out and her her mom came to the door and was like what what's going on and they were like it's melissa she's been stabbed we need to take you to her and she said as they were walking she saw blood stains all over the street and she said she realized that they were taking her to see her daughter before she died finally the helicopter gets there and this paramedic takes her from the ambulance to
Starting point is 00:41:50 the helicopter and he said his name was cameron and he said as he was loading her into the helicopter he just had this feeling wash over him he knew she was going to live and he knew he was going to see her again. More on that later. Okay. Was that secretly Miss Cleo? It was Miss Cleo. They managed to track down Robert Burton. When they find him, he had run his car into a convenience store. Cool. And taken a bunch of sleeping pills in an attempt to end his life. Hmm. That hit the wheel, burned through the tire, and then the metal ground on the pavement so long that the wheel had lodged itself into, like halfway into the cement.
Starting point is 00:42:53 That's crazy. It's crazy. How long does that take? I have no idea. I saw a picture of it and I was like, how does that even happen? Wow. happen wow meanwhile melissa has been rushed to bayfront health medical center and dr jeffrey johnson is interviewed on this episode of 48 hours and he's the first person to to work on melissa when she got there uh so this this medical center is in St. Petersburg. That's where they life flighted her to.
Starting point is 00:43:26 When she got there, she was essentially dead. She had lost so much blood. She had the faintest heart rate. And they immediately started CPR and got her into surgery. She flatlined twice while in surgery. Holy crap. And they resuscitated her. Holy crap. Oh they resuscitated her. Holy crap.
Starting point is 00:43:45 Oh, my God. They spent hours working on her to stop the bleeding, figure out if there was internal injuries. She had a stroke because of all the bleeding during this. three, four hours of ongoing resuscitation, the doctor asked her to squeeze his finger. And she did. Oh, my God. And he was like, I knew then she was going to be okay.
Starting point is 00:44:22 She spent 10 days in a coma in the ICU. Yeah. And then she woke up the very first thing she did when she woke up was ask for a piece of paper she couldn't speak because she had yeah you know tubes and everything and she wrote on the piece of paper she wrote dead alive or in jail oh that's the very first thing she asked good for her when she came to in the hospital. And so the detectives were like right there in her room and they said that he was in custody, that he'd been charged with attempted first degree murder, and that they were going to see this thing through and make sure that he got the harshest punishment possible. But Melissa couldn't focus on Robert just yet. She had to ask that because she was terrified that any second he could walk into her room.
Starting point is 00:45:15 And so knowing that he was in custody, that was enough for the time being, and she could focus on her recovery. And she had a long road ahead of her. 34 stab wounds, arms just horribly mangled. The stroke had left her body like half paralyzed. Oh my gosh. They told her that she would likely never walk again. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:45:39 But Melissa was determined. She had planned a trip, that trip to europe with her friends for graduation and she was gonna do it she asked her doctor what the likelihood of her being able to go on that trip was and he was like like honey hate to tell you i mean if you work really hard in physical therapy i mean maybe that's all she needed to hear. She needed to hear that there was a chance. And so she worked her ass off in physical therapy. Oh, this is amazing.
Starting point is 00:46:13 And three weeks after the attack, she walked out of the fucking hospital. What? No wheelchair, no walker, no cane. She walked out of the hospital that is crazy crazy oh we got a bottle whatever is in her that's amazing nuts right yes yes and she did make it to europe she graduated on time oh yeah okay yeah she graduated on time she went to europe with her friends and she says she just had this moment where she was standing in paris looking at the eiffel tower she was with her friends and it was like at night and the eiffel tower was all lit up
Starting point is 00:46:58 and she just started crying and her friends were just kind of like laughing at her like oh my gosh you're so lame and she's like, which is ridiculous. Yes, exactly. And she was like, and they were like, why are you crying? And she said, I don't know, because I almost died like a month ago. She said, I'm so happy. Like, how am I here? Do you realize that I was almost murdered?
Starting point is 00:47:20 And here I am in front of the Eiffel Tower. Yes. She said it showed her that she could really do anything. I think she's amazing. I think her friends are dumb. Dumb, yeah. But I think she is amazing. And now she knew exactly what she wanted to do.
Starting point is 00:47:43 Kill Robbie. Well, yeah. Melissa said, all I wanted to do was get on that stand in court and show him that I'm alive. Here I am. I'm beautiful
Starting point is 00:47:55 and you didn't win. Yeah. Oh. So because of all of the injuries to her face, she's had up 10 plus facial reconstruction and surgery. She's had to have a weight put in her eyelid because it no longer opens and closes properly.
Starting point is 00:48:13 She's gorgeous. She's beautiful. And she's beautiful still after all of everything she's been through. That's the most important thing. It's not. No, that's not what I'm saying. No, I'm teasing. Like, she is beautiful.
Starting point is 00:48:28 It was one year and one month after the attack that Melissa got to face Robert Burton in court for the first time. Did you get to watch video? No video. Oh, damn it. Oh, okay. I'll accept it.
Starting point is 00:48:41 So this was kind of a preliminary hearing where she had to talk about all of the things that led up to the attack to see if that information was going to be admissible at trial. It better fucking be. I would sure hope it is. But, you know, there's always questions about it because it's all her word. Nobody knew about any of it except for the one battery where he was actually arrested. Right. of it except for the one battery where he was actually arrested right and so she's up there talking about things that she's never told anyone ever she's never admitted to any of the things
Starting point is 00:49:12 and she said it was super hard and i can i can imagine how difficult that would be yeah and she said she was sitting up there talking about all these horrible things and that he was just staring her down. He wouldn't look away. And so she said, okay, I'm just going to look right back at him. And so she just stared him right in his eyes as she said every little thing that he had ever done to her. And she said it totally changed everything for her. It took the shame away and made her feel empowered. Oh, love it.
Starting point is 00:49:49 Yeah. Robert Burton would be held in jail for like two years while this thing was working its way through the court system. First, he tried to claim that he was incompetent to stand trial, that he had been mentally ill, temporarily insane, in a deep depression, yada, yada all that stuff the problem is i'm a huge murdering asshole so exactly also i don't want to stay on trial um but none of that worked and so they were moving forward with the trial they were in the jury selection phase.
Starting point is 00:50:26 And then all of a sudden, Robert got up and said, I can't go on trial. What? I'm guilty. I'm guilty. I'm pleading guilty. I can't do this. Wait, he said this in court? In court.
Starting point is 00:50:41 And his attorney was like, shut the fuck up, dude. Yeah. And so it was done. You're done you're there would be no trial he changed his plea to guilty uh-huh all that would remain would be the sentencing phase jail forever so it's attempted i know i know that doesn't carry the same. I know. That's so frustrating to me because she only lived because of her and because someone else intervened. Yeah, I'm so sorry she survived. Yeah. Yeah, that's ridiculous. At the sentencing, Melissa did take the stand and deliver an impact statement, a victim impact statement.
Starting point is 00:51:25 Yeah. She said, Your Honor, I pleaded and begged for Robert to stop. I didn't get a chance to walk away with 10 or 20 stab wounds. It wasn't until he believed I was finally dead and that my life was taken that he stopped. Yeah. I believe the only justice in return is a life sentence. I only came here with one thing to tell Robert. And it's that I forgive him.
Starting point is 00:51:56 Wow. She stood up there and she told him that she, she said, Robert, I forgive you for coming to my house and attempting to murder me. Wow. Yeah. She said she learned in all of her therapy and recovery. She spoke with someone who had been through something that was very similar to her.
Starting point is 00:52:14 This woman had been attacked by her estranged husband. And that woman said that it had given her the power back of her life to forgive her abuser. And so she decided that that's what she was going to do. And she said it was. It was just like a weight lifted off of her life to forgive her abuser. And so she decided that that's what she was going to do. And she said it was, it was just like a weight lifted off of her. That is amazing. What is her podcast? That is so crazy. She stood up there at his sentencing and said, I forgive you. She said, I had to show him that he truly had no hold on me yeah and that when i walked out of that courtroom i was letting go of him i was letting go of the memories i was letting go of the pain i was letting go of the hatred everything you can keep it all oh that's so good yeah oh
Starting point is 00:52:58 that's so good yeah and what better revenge honestly yeah he's fucking obsessed with her yeah yeah and to say you don't matter anymore i'm done yeah oh at the sentencing this is what the judge said to robert burton he said what drove you that night to go to her house and do what you did will never leave you it's a part of you and because of that i'm giving you the maximum sentence yes i'm sentencing you to life in prison whoa yes i couldn't believe that was even a possibility i mean either i really didn't think i didn't think that murder i didn't think that would be a possibility love it yeah he was sentenced to life in prison all right feeling really good okay so you remember that first responder that i talked to you about the one that helped her from the took her from the ambulance to the helicopter he said he just had this feeling right he was gonna see her again his name was cameron hill and 10 months after the attack melissa did a speaking engagement
Starting point is 00:54:13 where she oh my god they fell in love got together all of the people that had been in love oh my god all of the people that had been there as part of her recovery all the people that had saved her life all of the doctors that had been a part of it everybody who had been as part of her recovery all the people that had saved her life all of the doctors that had been a part of it everybody who had been a part of her journey she did this um this speech in front of all of them and cameron was one of the people that was there this is the best case ever i love this and so they got to talking at this event. And he asked to like friend her on Facebook. All of a sudden they're like. That's how Norman and I started.
Starting point is 00:54:49 He friended me on Facebook. All of a sudden they're exchanging messages on Facebook. And he invites her out to the fire station. She brings her mom to the fire station with her. She bakes cupcakes and comes. He gives her a tour. She tries on his whole suit and everything. Oh my God.
Starting point is 00:55:04 And then he asks her out on a real on his whole suit and everything and then he asks her out on a real date and they start dating oh my god where was their first date oh i don't know make something up it was at a beautiful park they went and watched the sunset i'm sorry okay i'm more of a nice restaurant yeah maybe okay and then like two years after the attack melissa was invited to throw out a ceremonial first pitch at the tampa bay rays baseball game so she did and then cameron was there and on the jumbotron it said will you marry me he was her catcher and he knelt and he posed her right there on the field oh my god i love it today they are married i love it i love it yes it's the best story ever oh my god that is so uplifting you and i are both clutching our hearts right now yes so melissa and and Cameron are in love and married. Melissa does speaking
Starting point is 00:56:07 engagements about the importance of recognizing abuse and knowing that nothing is your fault. She also does fundraisers for this charity that covers the costs of reconstructive surgeries for victims like her all of her facial reconstructive surgeries were paid for by this this charity so she does work for them yeah it's and she calls herself a sir thriver okay that's a little cheesy i love love it. I love it. No, it's good. It's good. Yes. And that's one hell of a story of survival. That was amazing. Yes. I loved every bit of it. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:56:52 I loved that he is in prison for life. Yeah. No parole, right? And probably parole. Just tell me. No, forever. Yeah. Forever and ever.
Starting point is 00:57:01 Yes. Great. Threw away the key. Forever and ever. Amen. Amen. Oh, my God. That was so good. ever. Yes. Great. Threw away the key. Forever and ever. Amen. Amen. Oh my God, that was so good. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:57:08 Ugh, finally. Ugh. An uplifting story. Domestic violence. Ugh. It blows. It gets to me. And I really, I mean, I hate it all the time, but I really hate it when someone's that young.
Starting point is 00:57:21 Because like, when you're that young, especially, it's so hard to see red flags you're not used to oh my god aren't they so cute they're so cute and is that their dog yes oh my gosh yeah yeah they're adorable super cute oh fucking robbie no i haven't forgiven robbie no i'm keeping some of the bitterness okay that was that was fantastic yeah loved it yes um i've been thinking we had people ask dp questions we didn't get to all of them yeah but there were some extra ones so i thought maybe we could go through a few absolutely let. Let's answer some questions. Oh, man. There are so many good questions. Someone wants to know what my dad's first thoughts on Norm were when he met him.
Starting point is 00:58:14 Ooh. Can I tell my first thoughts on Norm? Yes. Oh, my God. Very specific first thoughts on Norm. Oh, my God. Yes. Should we get him in here for this or no?
Starting point is 00:58:26 Is it better to say it behind his back? I mean, here, I've already said it to his face, so it doesn't matter, right? Yeah. Spill it. Spill it. Oh my gosh. I thought Norm like was too cool for school the first time we met him. He was like kind of quiet and like, but at one point we were sitting all at a table and
Starting point is 00:58:41 like he made this point to like scratch his arm and kind of show off his tattoo a little bit. And I was like, okay, this guy thinks he's so fucking cool and like too cool to be hanging out at this like fun little dinner right now. I don't think that about Norm at all now, but he was just very quiet and like seemed disinterested in the entertainment. The whole thing. The whole thing.
Starting point is 00:59:08 Yes. Okay. You know him very well now. Yeah. Looking back, what do you think was going on there? I think it was new people and he was just kind of shy. Yeah. Yes.
Starting point is 00:59:19 That's totally it. Yeah. Yeah. So when Norm is in a group with new people, I feel like sometimes he does get shy uh-huh and how do i hmm i don't know it just it can come across as kind of douchey yeah yeah yeah i thought he was a super douche you thought he was a super douche i didn't think that it only took her six months to decide he wasn't what was your first impression of norm the first time you met him
Starting point is 00:59:53 you thought oh i like that 12 year old boy a little bit you guys there's a picture of christian and norm from when they very first met and Norm looks like a 12 year old boy. He had a baby face for like the first I'm going to say the first three years that we dated. He had a baby face. He looked so young
Starting point is 01:00:12 in that picture. Yes. Yes. No, I I thought he was hilarious. I thought he was absolutely hilarious and very, very different.
Starting point is 01:00:24 Yeah. Which both things were true. True, yeah. Also, I thought he was absolutely hilarious and very, very different. Yeah. Which both things were true. True, yeah. Also, I thought he was a super douche. No, I think the part of the super doucheness comes in when, like, you know, he's got this YouTube show. Yeah. Like, he's doing well. Well, but he doesn't like to talk about it.
Starting point is 01:00:42 He's super modest about it. And so, like, that can come off. Like, if you don't know that he's very genuinely that way yes could come off douchey i think you're exactly right because like if you try to discuss it with him yeah he's going to try to change the subject very much so actually you know what he's not even gonna do that he's gonna give you like one word answers and then look awkwardly at the floor. Yes, exactly. So it looks like, oh boy, here this boring little person is asking me about my exciting career on YouTube. Yes. No, but it's just that he's so modest about it.
Starting point is 01:01:15 Yes, genuinely modest. Okay. I have this very specific memory of there was this one time I was at a restaurant and I was telling someone it was before we even started the podcast is when we're talking about starting the podcast yeah and we talked about it for a long time yeah so we're talking about starting the podcast and um whoever I was talking to was asking me about you and norm and and I was like well norm knows a lot of the behind the scenes stuff because of his youtube channel and and i was explaining that to them and people at the table behind that us turn around they're like um excuse me did you
Starting point is 01:01:51 just say the gaming historian and i was like yes and they're like oh we are huge fans of the gaming historian that is crazy you know him that is crazy and i was like yes i know him? That is crazy. And I was like, yes, I know him. Yes, I am also cool. And so then the next time I saw Norm, I was like, oh my goodness, the Gammie is still in. Like, I made this big deal. And I told him the story. And he was just like embarrassed by it because he's so modest. So on that note, yeah.
Starting point is 01:02:23 My favorite thing to do. You know, I pick him up from the airport a lot obviously my new favorite thing because you know i drive the car up to the curb at kci and he's always looking at his phone so my favorite thing to do is roll down the passenger side window and go oh my god it's the gaming historian gets a laugh out of him never never he has never laughed but he hates that i laugh every time oh eleanor wants to know who do you think would win in a fight kristin or brandy i hope people aren't mad that we're taking questions for my dad and giving them to us. But who do I think is fine? Who would win?
Starting point is 01:03:08 Are we talking about like a physical fight or a debate? If it's a debate, you would win. If it's a physical fight, I mean, I'm just bigger than you, so I'd probably win, right? I don't know. There's only one way to find out. We fight to the death. Once we get a thousand people on Patreon, then we fight to the death. Once we get a thousand people on Patreon, then we fight to the death. Whoever survives gets to host the podcast solo.
Starting point is 01:03:34 Akash wants to know, what really grinds your gears right now, DP? Well, I can tell you what is grinding his gears right now. Yeah, I can too. I cut so many. Okay. Obviously, anytime we have a guest on the podcast, that episode is going to run pretty long. So there's just more stuff to cut out. With my dad on, I mean, that man, he calls it a Seinfeld reference, but it's really an episode retelling.
Starting point is 01:04:05 Yes. Do you remember the episode where... Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. And it just goes on and on forever. You know what it reminds me of? That Chris Farley thing. Do you remember when Chris Farley had this sketch on SNL where it was just him as a talk show host. And he was just like, do you remember that?
Starting point is 01:04:21 Yeah. And that was it. There was no question. There was nothing out. It was just like, do you remember that yeah and that was it there was no question there was nothing out it was just like do you remember so my dad is devastated that i cut that hang on let's see if he's responded to me pause for my phone to load okay okay so yeah my dad texted me what happened to my four seinfeld references dp is is getting angry. And I said, they were lame. So then he said, and I think this is very uncharacteristic and sketchy. He goes, okay, you did a great job on the editing. Oh, is Sheree Ray involved? Yeah, so I wrote back,
Starting point is 01:04:56 did mom make you say this? And he just said, he, he, he. That's a yes. That is, my mom said, you know, they work very hard on that podcast. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Ooh. So Andrea wanted to know, what's your favorite Brandy, Kristen, long-term friend story? What story would you tell to illustrate their friendship? Do you have a story that illustrates our friendship? I feel like the last time we were asked this question we just answered embarrassing questions
Starting point is 01:05:26 about each other I know gosh I don't know we've been friends for so long I know too damn long I mean really what's the expiration date on this consider wrapping this up well if we fight to the death,
Starting point is 01:05:45 that's right. Yeah, hurry up. Subscribe to our Patreon, and let's hurry that thing up. Here's the thing. I'm thinking with the fight to the death, like, you're probably stronger than me, but I feel like I could run away from you. No, you would absolutely run away from me.
Starting point is 01:06:01 This fight would last for forever. It would last so long. It could last for years of me just seeing you and then taking off running. Yeah, you would absolutely run away from me. This fight would last for forever. It would last so long. It could last for years of me just seeing you and then taking off running. Yeah, you're exactly right. I'd be like, is she still at my house? That bitch is in my recliner. Listen, Kristen,
Starting point is 01:06:17 I don't want to fight to the death with you. No, I don't want to fight to the death with you either. Or am I going to find a new long-term friend? Way too much time invested in this friendship. Absolutely. It's just not even possible. Possible as in like we don't have the personalities to get new friends? Yeah, exactly.
Starting point is 01:06:36 Oh, my gosh. I'm going to vet somebody and find out if they're worth the time. What do you look for in a friend um blonde topless topless yeah that's a road trip reference oh okay i thought that was a comment about my top you guys i'm wearing a real cute dress i I remember Beth asks, what's his butt? Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. What he looks for in a girl.
Starting point is 01:07:07 And he's like, she should be blonde and topless. Do you have a good story about our friendship? No good stories. No, let me think. Let me think. Yeah, I can't think of anything. Yeah, I guess it's not that good of a friendship. Guess it kind of sucks.
Starting point is 01:07:30 No, I mean, I just think that's too hard a question. It is. It's way too hard of a question. Yeah. Can't handle it. No. I can't go through all of the files of our entire friendship. We have many files.
Starting point is 01:07:39 There's way too many files. We haven't digitized shit. No. I have a photo. I think I've told you this a photo of you i just i found it the other day of your entire fist in your mouth listen i have a giant mouth kristen and a tiny fist i have a baby fist and a giant mouth. Frankly, there's room to spare. It's very roomy. No, I think, so it was, this photo was taken in the car.
Starting point is 01:08:12 We were on a road trip. And I feel like I remember you saying you could fit your fist in your hand. And we were all like, no, you can't. Fist in my hand? Is that what I said? Yeah. It can't be done. I think I can still do it. Do it. my hand? Is that what I said? Yeah. You know what you can't be doing? I think I can still do it.
Starting point is 01:08:28 Do it. You want me to do it right now? Yeah. Oh, this is going to be disgusting. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. She's got a...
Starting point is 01:08:36 Oh, my God. Ew. Ew. You guys, her fingers disappeared in no time i have a giant mouth okay that's why my voice is so loud she's echoey in there it's like a canyon like a giant canyon oh my god i remember one time i was like i don't even know what i was doing and i like i must have like i don't know i was making some point and i oh like job like did like a jaw drop and my mom was like looked at me and she goes oh my gosh your mouth is so big she was just like horrified by the size of my mouth how are you my mom can daughter? My mom cleans my teeth, so she's been in that mouth a lot.
Starting point is 01:09:29 I mean, probably a lap of luxury cleaning your teeth, right? Just so roomy. You get both hands and all kinds of instruments in there. Here's the test. When you go to get your teeth cleaned, do they ever have to tell you, open wider? Oh, no. Okay, well, yeah, you got a big mouth. Never. get your teeth cleaned do they ever have to tell you open wider oh no okay well yeah you know big mouth never i also have an extremely mobile bottom jaw don't tell us about your sex life
Starting point is 01:09:55 okay wildly inappropriate no i have this like bite guard i have to wear um that i don't wear but i'm supposed to wear because i i grit my teeth when i say guard is that like legends of the hidden temple it's not it's it like clips onto my forefront teeth it's not like a big plastic like wrestler one okay no but like um it's got this little thing on the end of it to keep you from being able to move your jaw around it. That sounds like a pain in the ass. Yeah, I don't wear it because of it. And so when I got it in, my dentist was like, this is the longest end I've ever seen on one of these. How much can you move your jaw?
Starting point is 01:10:38 And so I showed him and he's like, what the hell? Because they do like a couple, they figure, I don't know. There's a whole science to how they figure out how wide that thing has to be to keep you from being able to move around it. Yeah. I've got a crazy mouth. Well, congratulations. Thank you. Uh-huh.
Starting point is 01:10:55 I'm glad we've talked for 20 minutes about how big my mouth is now. Should we do Supreme Court inductions? Oh, you know we should. Guys, this time, okay, I'm loving this. We've changed up the question. Last time we were asking people for their favorite word. This time, least favorite word. I'm just, are we just going to say moist a bunch of times?
Starting point is 01:11:15 That's what I thought. Moist is the first one. Oh, excellent. But people found some ones that I hate. Really? Yes, I was like, yes you do you want to say yours the words that i hate the most yeah do you want to give one panties oh i also i also hate that you know what i say instead of panties underpants underpants that's exactly what i said i don't know
Starting point is 01:11:39 why panties they always sound creepy that sounds filthy and creepy yeah it does mucus it gives me a physical reaction yeah i can tell i can tell that you almost threw up everywhere which is funny because my dad's word that he submitted is not that different than yeah don't don't spoil it okay okay if you guys if you're wondering how you could join the Supreme Court and get inducted on a future episode, Kristen's about to tell you how. Join us at patreon.com slash lgtcpodcast. If you join at the Supreme Court level, you get a sticker, you get access to the Discord where we're talking all day, talking all night.
Starting point is 01:12:22 You get bonus episodes. You get inducted. You get inducted. You get to vote on topics. So much stuff. So many things. It's amazing. So for today's inductions, I would like everybody to please have a seat. Wow, what a letdown.
Starting point is 01:12:38 I usually tell people to stand. I know. Destiny Philpott. Moist. Eleanor Donahue. Equidistant. Oh, I like that word. Geneva Waite.
Starting point is 01:12:51 Supple. Oh, I don't like it. Steven. Fiery one. Demeter. Defeat. Like, what's up with defeat? You should have buttered me up for that one
Starting point is 01:13:07 yeah everyone in the discord will get that because well we don't need to tell all of Steven's business yeah that's the secrets of our discord Kira Kiki Newell oh my god
Starting point is 01:13:24 oh my gosh this is so funny Kira Kiki Newell. Oh my God. Oh my God, this is so funny. She says, this is my least favorite word simply because I pronounced it Beignet for the longest time. The actual item is delicious and it is beignet. Okay. That is hilarious. For the rest of my life, I am going to see beignets and think, beige neck. Liz M. It's a tie between hubby and potty.
Starting point is 01:13:56 Oh, I say hubby sarcastically. Yeah, those are both kind of way too cutesy. Tim Pounds. That's my dad. Aw. His least favorite word is puss. Ew. Which is not that different from mucus, so.
Starting point is 01:14:09 I don't know. It's different from him. The puss or the mucus. Ew, girls. Marissa. Thruple. Ooh. Katina.
Starting point is 01:14:21 Oh, God. Panties. Oh, this was just disgusting. Oh, God. Panties. Oh, this was just disgusting. So bad. Welcome to the Supreme Court. Oh, my God. Oh, my gosh. That?
Starting point is 01:14:34 That was gross, but fun. It is fun. It's super fun. I can't wait to do more of those. Guys, thank you so much for your support. If you're looking for other ways to support us, find us on social media. We're on Facebook. We're on Twitter.
Starting point is 01:14:48 We're on Instagram. We're on YouTube. find us on social media we're on facebook we're on twitter we're on instagram we're on youtube we're on reddit we're on patreon once you've gone to all those places head on over to uh you know itunes or whatever it is apple podcast now yeah it's called apple podcast now they're changing things up been called that for a long time we're just slow on the uptake whatever it still says itunes on my computer because i haven't updated okay head on. Head on over to Apple Podcasts and leave us a rating, leave us a review, and, you know, then be sure to join us
Starting point is 01:15:11 next week. When we'll be experts on two whole new topics. Podcast adjourned. And now for a note about our process. I read a bunch of stuff, then regurgitate it
Starting point is 01:15:22 all back up in my very limited vocabulary. And I copy and paste from the best sources on the web, and sometimes Wikipedia. So we owe a huge thank you to the real experts. For this episode, I got my info from the Associated Press, the Connecticut Post, the New York Post, Snopes, and Fox 4. And I got my info from the 48 hours episode Live to Tell One Last Hug. People Magazine, CBS News and BBC News. For a full list of our sources visit lgtcpodcast.com. Any errors are of course ours but please don't take our
Starting point is 01:15:57 word for it go read their stuff.

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