Loremen Podcast - S5 Ep30: Loremen S5Ep30 - Hunting the Werewolf on Cannock Chase

Episode Date: May 2, 2024

Where wolves? James attempts to answer that question with a midnight excursion to Cannock Chase. This Area of Outstanding Natural Beauty is home to a range of distinctly unnatural creatures. We're talking lycanthropes, black eyed children, numerous UFOs and at least one pigman. In fact, there are many reports of uncanny incidents in Cannock Chase, James went all the way to Staffordshire to investigate. Alas, our intrepid loreboy encountered a much more human phenomenon. SAUCINESS WARNING: This episode contains references to a grown up activity. One that takes place at night, in car parks. Pay and Display (without the pay) if you know what we mean... The Quantum Mechanics - Paranormal Podcast Rural Concerns Join us for another Loremen Live in Oxford on 25th May: https://oldfirestation.org.uk/whats-on/loremen-podccast/ This episode was edited by Joseph Burrows - Audio Editor. LoreBoys nether say die! Support the Loremen here (and get stuff): patreon.com/loremenpod ko-fi.com/loremen Check the sweet, sweet merch here... https://www.teepublic.com/stores/loremen-podcast?ref_id=24631 @loremenpod youtube.com/loremenpodcast www.instagram.com/loremenpod www.facebook.com/loremenpod

welcome to lawmen a podcast about local legends and obscure curiosities from days of yore i'm james shakeshaft and i'm alistair beckett king I'm taking you to the wilds of a Midland National Park. Oh, no. I think it's a national park. Listeners, maybe don't listen with kids that you don't want to have to explain too much to, because this is a little, this does get a little saucy at times. James, are you doing a sauciness warning? This is a sauciness warning.

Okay. But that said, let's delve into the mystery of the werewolf of Cannock Chase. Delving, are we? I mean, if you've got a problem with that, maybe turn off now. Alistair. Hello there, James. Hello there. How are you?

I'm all right. You look like you've had an experience of some kind. There's a wild look in your eyes. Your hair's askew. What have you seen, James? Basically, I went werewolf hunting on Saturday night. What? James.

With some bigger boys and girls. Oh, God. James, they're leading you astray. It was the host of the Quantum Mechanics podcast, Peter and Ben. They took me and a couple of psychics. I can't imagine how big those boys must be if they're bigger than you. Is that psychics or sidekicks? Well, they were sidekicks, sidekicks. Psychic sidekicks, the most useful kind of sidekick. They know what's going on. And we all piled into a seven-seater car.

I had front seat. I was the tallest. So you were the biggest boy. I knew it. Yeah, I was the biggest boy. I knew he was the biggest boy. And Tim, we all went to Cannock Chase. Is that a famous place?

Do I recognise that name? Cannock Chase, we have mentioned it before. And specifically, we have mentioned the Cannock Chase werewolf before, simply as an aside in the Hull werewolf, Old Stinker. Oh. Long, long time ago. England, Britain is quite low on werewolves. Very light on werewolves.

We've mentioned that before. Compared to France. You can't move for werewolves in France. Oui. Oui. Le werewolf. Le garou. Oui.

Mon Dieu. Le chien d'humain. Ma jambe. Ma jambe. Mon. Oui. Le garou. Le garou. Oui. Mon Dieu. Le chien d'humain. Ma jambe. Ma jambe. Mon jambe. Either way, it's in a bad state. And also, I grabbed my arm there. The listener couldn't see, but I grabbed my arm.

That, of course, would have been my bra, not my jambe. Yeah, this werewolf, the Cannock Chase one. Well, look, I'm all over the shop because the other thing that cannot chase it turns out is famous for aside from werewolves ufo sightings and a pig man he's just sliding a pig man in there under the radar to be honest all we know about him is he's the result of an experiment gone wrong and it really does beg the question what would have been that experiment going right it's a man with the head of a pig. What were you expecting?

I ordered the head of a man on the body of a pig. This is the opposite of what I wanted. It's a simple switcheroo. Yeah. They've got it the wrong way around. They've sent what I want to the other person, and they've sent the pig's head on a man's body to me. It's ridiculous.

And you can't get a hold of anyone with your phone. There's no phone number on the website. It's a chatbot. Yeah. It's a chatbot with the head of a pig. Do you want to know, do you want to just, while we're here, there isn't much about the pig man. The pig man.

The pig man. The pig man. Half man, half swine. Spotted across the heathland since the 1940s yeah yeah it sounds like a 20th century experiment that's the pig man i we were there for a werewolf but the other thing so if if a pig man had approached you you would you would have said sorry sorry not interested not interested looking for a werewolf look the other thing that canik chase is famous for, it is a thing that we have alluded to before using the euphemism pay and display, but not the pay bit. I think, you know what I mean?

Okay. I think you might be being too euphemistic. Park and ride. It's a car-based activity. Yes. Popular with grown-ups. With grown-ups. It's called, I mean, cover your kids' ears if you don't want to have to explain something now.

It's called dogging. Which is also a euphemism. It's already a euphemism. There's no way of putting it. There's no dogs involved. There's no way of putting it politely or at all. It defies description, and i'm not going to try now it seems that i in doing this trip i proved to myself that i believe in werewolves more than

i believe in dogging because i went there to see a werewolf but literally the very first lay-by we pulled into by the german prisoner of war grave which is where the werewolf is supposed to have been seen, first of all, in the 1960s. There were three or four cars and some men in hoodies standing around. We panicked. We instantly panicked. The lot of us. All of us paranormal investigators panicked in the car.

What are we going to do? Are you paranormal investigators? Excuse me? To be honest, we going to do? Are you paranormal investigators? Excuse me? To be honest, we don't know. They very well could have been. We don't know that they weren't. They were parked up next to the German prisoner of Wargrave, the spookiest part of Cannock Chase.

The site of the first sighting of the Cannock Grave. Do we know which war it was? Do we know how sympathetic we should feel towards those dead Germans? They were prisoners of war. Yeah, but which one? It was one and two, I think. First World War Germans. Much sympathy for First World War Germans.

Much less sympathy for Second World War Germans. I think it was one and two, but mostly two. One and two. Oh, they've just bundled them in together there. Well, that's rather muddied the waters. I don't know the history of all the people in there. Some of them may have just been German people living in the waters. I don't know the history of all the people in there. Some of them may have just been German people living in the country. I don't know what Britain's history is on the incarceration of German nationals during the war years.

Right, back to dogging now, James. We did some recording. The psychics investigated the graveyard a little bit more than me. I didn't really feel comfortable doing that. I sort of went around the outside, nearly trod in some dog poo. That wouldn't have happened to the psychics. As we lurked around this location of the werewolf sighting, we could hear them sort of chatting away.

I couldn't hear the specifics of what they were saying, but it sounded pretty normal and boring. It sounded like it was just like a few men having a chat. Yeah, I mean, I don't imagine that doggers are fascinating individuals conversationally they're not going there for a chat are they these guys were and they were guys i think i guess the sort of the thing that makes dogging so special wasn't happening at that point yeah Yeah. So you've got to pass the time. Similar to werewolf hunting, I suppose. Yes, yes, exactly.

They could easily have been paranormal investigators and we were just too shy to approach them and they could have been thinking the same about us. Yes. So the Cannock Chase werewolf has been seen since the 1970s. 1975, in fact, is the first sighting. But it is seriously the tip of the iceberg of weird things that happen in canuck chase paranormally and canuck chase is a very peculiar area as well

that it's it's quite wild woodland but then like within it are sort of mid to late 20th century towns that don't seem to have like an old bit. It's not like it's an old village that got, because the industrial age grew up. As far as we saw, we only kind of- They just plonked down some modern towns in the middle of nowhere. An estate, a 60s estate, which backs onto a water tower, which is the site of like a load of UFO sightings,

black-eyed children. Are you sightings, black eyed children. Are you aware of the black eyed children phenomenon? Now, when you say water tower, I don't, we don't really have those much in the UK, do we? Am I right in picturing like an American style water tower on big legs,

like the Warner Brothers water tower? It was, it did not contain the Warner Brothers and the Warner sister too. It was, it was kind of a solid mass with a bigger top and then a kind of solid thing. I think it was built in 1934. So it's got kind of a bit of an art deco, but a little bit like brutal at the same time. It seemed quite nice, but I was terrified at the time because this was the site of a black-eyed child encounter.

There was a couple in the woods, which a lot of these stories seem to start with. I wonder what they were up to. And they were just passing the time. The most recent sighting of the black-eyed child was in April 2018. That's very recent. I believe by a Lee Brickley, who's written most of the books on Cannock Chase's paranormal activity. What an extraordinary coincidence that the black-eyed child made itself known to someone who was already into the paranormal side

of Cannock Chase. And his aunt. Oh, and his aunt. Okay, sorry, I didn't know we had a corroborating witness. This was a different time. His aunt also saw, According to the Daily Star, there was a plague of black-eyed ghost children. Just for listeners in America, that's our most respected newspaper in this country, the Daily Star.

Why lie? What did the Daily Star say? Well, the headline is, ghost terror, black-eyed child. There's too many pop-ups. I tried to looked Child. There's too many pop-ups. I tried to look at it and there's too many pop-ups. Classic newspaper website. Millions of pop-ups. Little video playing.

You can't mute it. I can hear that. It's making a noise. Ghost Terror, Black Eyed Child spotted in UK for first time in 30 years, which implies there's not a child or that there's more than one, I guess. Do you really want me to send feedback why I closed that ad? So there were first sightings of black-eyed children

in the 1980s. And then when Lee Brickley, who runs the blog Paranormal Cannock, he managed to collect a bunch of stories. A woman and her daughter were walking through Birch's Valley and heard the screams of a young child. I couldn't tell if it was, this is a quote from the woman, I couldn't tell if it was a boy or girl, but they definitely seemed in distress and sounded very close to us. So we instantly started running toward the noise. We couldn't find the child anywhere and so stopped to catch our breath.

That's when I turned around and saw a girl stood behind me, no more than 10 years old, with her hands over her eyes. She then put her arms down by her side and opened her eyes, which is when I saw they were completely black. No iris, no white, nothing. I jumped back, grabbed my daughter. When I looked again, the child was gone. That's pretty scary.

I was going to start saying that it was a fox or something but then a black-eyed child phantom appeared. Then it had hands. It had hands, yeah, and a human body. But black eyes. And so Lee collected this story and he's got the story from 1982 which, as he writes, in the summer of 1982 my aunt was 18 years old. She and her friends would often meet on canik chase in the evening time probably much the same way teenagers still do today

we don't know what they're up to paranormal hunting i guess tiddlywinks who knows one evening just before dark she had a little girl frantically shouting for help rushing to locate the sound she stumbled upon a dirt track and caught sight of the girl about six years old Exactly the same, but slightly younger. Slightly younger. Yeah, but not 30 years younger. Could the black-eyed child be ageing a year for every 15 of ours, maybe? Like a reverse dog. Yes, like a reverse dog.

So, yes, Lee has written a lot. A lot of the stories of Canuck Chase do come from Lee and his books. There's no reason to be suspicious about that. There's no reason, but I was thinking, right, and if Lee were to be making this up, right, because the dogging community... Hypothetically. Okay, the dogging community doesn't get on with the paranormal community,

the paranormal investigator, the amateur paranormal investigating community. No, it's like the sharks and the jets. Exactly. They tend to cramp one another's styles. Maybe Lee is just a local who's just got fed up with it being a dogging hotspot, a dog spot. And he's trying to attract more anorak-wearing geeks like you, James,

into the area just to kill to kill the vibe yes exactly wow yeah so you arrive with your ev meters and your your little tape for electronic voice phenomenon and that thing egon has in ghostbusters shouting it's an all that's the first stage of a manifestation um yeah killing the mood absolutely ruining the vibes yeah yes like the way they put the lights on at the end of the night to tell everybody to go home in a bar just to go oh the vibe's gone now yeah absolutely that's you james yeah yeah that is me that's a great i respect respect that, frankly. If that is, if it is, or alternatively, these could all be true accounts that Lee has heard. Well, then the doggers want to watch out.

If there's all that spooky business going on. Yeah, exactly. Because I doubt they're telling people where they're going and saying, you know, if I don't come back, I've gone to Cannock Chase to hang out with men near hatchbacks. Which is a type of car, not a village. Absolutely. Yeah, it does sound like a village, doesn't it?

Yeah, that's a good name for a village. Now, there are a lot of UFO sightings there. And having been there, I really, really doubt that those flashing lights and peculiar sounds and basically car noises, I doubt they were UFOs. Because there were a lot of cars about. And flashing lights is very much a feature of the other thing that it's famous for around there. of the other thing that it's famous for around there. So there is a story that someone was abducted.

When they came to, they had October 27 written on their hand. Well, that could be three years from now. So that could be a prediction. But what's going to happen then? Don't know. Or it could be the 27th of October. Now that I think about it. It was almost a decade ago that this happened.

So we've had loads of October 27th since then. Yeah, at least nine, depending on when you listen to this. We went up to a place called Castle Ring, which is the highest point of the chase, which sort of sounds like something Sherlock Holmes might shout, to be honest. So Castle Ring is an old Iron Age encampment on the top of a hill, obviously. And it was very atmospheric up there.

We did some filming. This was the place that we all kind of felt the most calm because the car park was shut, basically. So it was quite fine. The car park was shut, basically. So it was quite fine. I thought you meant that like a sort of a spiritual calm descended upon your wall, but you just meant that you couldn't see any guys wearing hoodies. Yeah, basically.

A big ring, basically. Are we talking about an earthworks? Yeah, all that's really left. I love an earthworks. Great. It's kind of like a big unfilled swimming pool, a big Iron Age unfilled swimming pool a big iron age unfilled swimming pool because like there's a big bank around which is a good you know few hundred

meters across and we were there looking around and then we saw two little pinpricks of light on the other side of the ring two appeared as we shined our very high powered torches and then another two and another two. And they kind of started bouncing around and leaping. And it was deers. Deers? Deer. Yeah. And that was,

that was, that was very nice. And you could see like over the, over the area, but it's also the site of some UFO sightings, flybys, and apparently satanic rituals are said to have started there. Yeah.

But I think that's just what Lee says. Okay. We're dismissing Lee out of hand, are we? And then the final place we went to was a little sort of car park. They were all car parks. By this point, we'd... Honestly, at some point, you know, end up in a dogging car park once, shame on them.

But end up in three car parks, shame on you, James. Look somewhere else. Just like, oh, what's in this car park? Oh, no, again. What? How does this keep happening to us? So at one point we were driving, and because we were driving and because we were

going on we were driving down we were not we were not taking normal routes to places and at one point we were driving

and we were like I think I think this car's following us and we went like a right and a left and we started going to like

quite a suburban street and it was still fun and we were like okay we'll turn right here and if if they follow us down they're definitely following us because this is just like a random'll turn right here and if if they follow us down and they're definitely

following us because this is just like a random we turned right they drove past yeah so we do okay the sigh of relief i thought you for a minute i thought you had a bogey on your tail but you had a bogey on your six which is your tail it is uh so we did a three-point turn turn around came back to the road around the corner had come back. It had very distinctive headlights. What? It was very clearly the same car. They'd gone up, turned around and come back. It was a red cash car. Ooh. Ooh.

The most intimidating car on the market. Exactly, but it's got very distinct headlights. Yeah, so we visited lots of different sites of spookiness, and the calmness that the castle ring had given us had dissipated. Well, you're being tailed, James, by a red Kashkai. Kashkai? Kashkai.

I'll be honest, I don't know what type of car we're talking about here. What's it called? It's called a Kashkai, which is obviously spelled Q-A-I-S-H-Q-A-I. Oh, well, yes, if you'd spelled it, of course I would have known. Kashkai. At one point, we just pulled up in a lay-by, and we did some recording, we were telling the stories, and we were very paranoid about leaving lights on,

because there's a whole etiquette. One person had ruined his search history by finding out what the rules are for dogging. And there's, you know, having the lights on, leaving your window half open or fully open, it implies different things. I see, I see. What's the signal for, we're paranormal investigators? Like Scooby-Doo, leave us alone.

We're looking very embarrassed, I think. We're just a pair of mysterious teens. And having high-powered torches. Yeah, we read over the stories, and we went to the final place, which is where there had been some UFO sightings, and a couple in the 60s had parked up there, and I think they, for a bit of amorosity, amorosity? Amorousness. There is such a theme such a

theme what is going on in canon and they how i believe it would have happened they saw a car slowly go past them up the hill no driver and then and it sort of imagined like looking out like an and there was trees alongside the alleyway and they saw the car, the body come past and then saw the driver's bit and there's no driver in there. That's the hood for American listeners. Oh yeah, the hood, sorry, Americans. The driver area, no driver in there. The backseat. That's if there wasn't a driver, Americans.

There's no driver there. Then there's the boot. Please translate, Alistair. That's the trunk. And then behind the boot, there was an alien pushing the car up the hill. That's the alien broken down. I guess so.

I guess so. Oh, that didn't happen. No, that didn't happen. That didn't happen. And I think it was the same people. I'm very excited because that was a great, obviously not true story. I can't wait to find out what else happened to these same people. A bunch of weird people came out of the woods in like robes and tried to like recruit like get them to join us and come with us oh so these are your satanists these are probably your satanists um so we did

so we told that story and then i was like i've done i've shot some stuff for a field report it is grainy and then i so we told that story we were pretty nervy and we'd been shaken up to be honest by the whole evening we're like we let's just get home now but i was like can i just do one little video bit please so when i did a bit of field report outside the car and then we're like okay we're gonna go i'm just gonna have a quick wee and i turned to go for a, and then at the end of the road, with hedges on either side, headlights slowed down and turned it on. So I just bundled and jumped back in the car as quick as possible. Yeah. And we pulled away.

Yeah, you don't want to be engaging in any below-the-belt business. No, no, exactly. And as we pulled away, we saw... Not when you're staring down the headlights of a red cash guy. It was the red cash guy from earlier, Elias. It was the red cash guy from earlier. The distinctive headlights of a cash guy. We saw the gleam of the red coat of paint and we were...

Wow. And then it's been pushed by an alien as well. Even scarier. But the thing is, because we know like going into it we knew that it was a dogging hotspot you knew that going into it you've you've painted yourself as incredibly naive throughout the entire thing i i thought you were surprised every time you encounter like i say i i turns out i believe in i believed in werewolves more than i believed in doggers. Yeah.

Maybe we need some kind of day-on, day-off system for paranormal investigators and doggers. Just everybody can enjoy the chase in their own way. Exactly. But not simultaneously. Yeah, so we did know that this was famous for doggers. We didn't realise quite how many people that actually means in real life. But if we hadn't have known that, we didn't see anything that looked like, as I say, the thing that makes dogging unique.

What would we have thought those people were? Because we were going there for paranormal business. Would we have assumed that these were black-eyed kids in their hatchbacks or something? Yeah, satanic cultists. They do wear hoods, don'ted kids in their hatchbacks or something. Yeah. Satanic cultists. They do wear hoods, don't they? They wear hooded robes.

The modern version of hooded robes would be hoodies. Would be hooded hoodies. Hoodies, yeah. Another theory that I came up with, apart from the Lee one from earlier, was werewolves are known for having bright red eyes. Like? earlier was werewolves are known for having bright red eyes like like the rear ends of cars and flashing on your brake lights is a lure for the the the you know right the dog people that yeah that's confusing the dogging people some of these sightings of of of dogs of dogging what if some of these sightings of dogs, of dogging, what if some of these doggers are, it's just a werewolf, and people are going over there, they're getting eaten by that werewolf.

That's how the story's not getting out. So maybe the werewolves kind of come up with the, like is very thankful that the idea of dogging exists because it brings them fresh meat. But yeah, I felt very Alan Partridge saying to Lynn, Lynn, these are sex people, quite a lot of the time on that trip. But the other, the flip side of the theory is, you know how in coastal towns where there was a lot of smuggling,

there'd be a lot of legends about that certain areas of the coastline were haunted by perhaps a skinless boy or, you know, a headless horse or something like that. Yeah. And these were stories that are put about by smugglers in order to scare off, you know, people from their business. Maybe the whole werewolf thing, black eyed kids, that's being put about by the doggers in order to scare people off it could be but it seems to me that they're actually a little bit short on people or notably from your description women and maybe they need better marketing because it's it sounds an awful lot like a car park full of guys waiting that, to be honest, what we... You could get that at B&Q. Don't, that's not, let's not, that's not a,

we're not trying to besmirch the name of B&Q because that's our rumour star, Alistair. Sorry. What does B&Q stand for? Nothing saucy. All right, all right. In summary, I was up till three. Was that, what kind of a shiver was that, though? Was that a shiver of terror?

It's a mix of shivers. A shiver of regret. Yeah, and it was a bit chilly as well. When we were up on the ring, mist came in as well when we were seeing the deer jumping around. It was very atmospheric. Nice and secluded. Actually secluded. So, so far, Alistair, you might have noticed this has been quite scattergun.

To be honest, James, I was thinking, where's he going with this? Where's he going? What's happening? And then an alien was pushing a car, and suddenly I was on board. I completely changed my... Previously, I thought it was just a handful of oddballs driving around in the night being weird, but now I realise there is serious alien activity on the go, and I respect you for chasing them down, those aliens,

pushing their car to the... Is there a petrol station near here? Does anyone know how to fix a hyperdrive? Have you got a tyre iron or whatever? A space tyre iron. A tire space tire iron i want to kind of bring everything together i think we've cited our sources it's mostly lee and of course the quantum mechanics who were the ones that lured me on this wild werewolf chase one of the sources that we used was cited in the shropshire star in an article from October 26, 2020.

It's basically a couple of guys, Richard Pursehouse and Ben Cunliffe. Great names. Pursehouse. I think he means bank. That's a lovely name, Pursehouse. So they've made a map, and the headline is

Cannock's Spooktacular Map on Ghoul-Ghould Earth. Oh, ghoul. Right. Yeah. I'm going to repeat that pun. Ghoul-Ghould Earth. Right. I was thinking ghoul, the town in Yorkshire.

But you mean ghoul as in a spirit, a spectre. Yeah. So the byline is, a werewolf, a black panther,ther umpteen ghosts and even an alien pushing a car up a hill just some of the more unusual sights at canuck chase so what it is is a map of it called creepy canuck chase and it what i want to do is kind of just go around the map and just get a quick hot take uh from you on some of these. Oh,

okay. You'll hear some of the ones we've talked about already, and hopefully it'll clarify some of the, some of the areas where I was a little bit woolly. So boom, we're going to start. I want to, I want you to tell me basically,

is it a dogger or is it, is it dogging or is it supernatural? Is it, what's a good, what's a good opposite to something pithy is it dogging or goblin no um that sounds too similar uh spooky or kinky spooky or kinky yes okay we start off at milford road a bedraggled woman in shabby clothes milford is already leaning towards kinky, I have to say. I'm waiting to see how this develops.

Bedraggled woman in shabby clothes spotted by a female motorist at the roadside near Shugborough and offered a lift. The woman promptly vanished as soon as she was dropped off. Spooky. Spooky, not Kinky. Spoopy. Even though it's in Milford. Even though it's in Milford.

Shugborough. I repeat, Shugborough. Yes. I heard you the first time, yes. Nice. The name comes from the Old English Shucksborough, implying an ancient earthwork haunted by a demon or evil spirit. The house is reputed to be haunted by Lady Harriet,

and a former housekeeper haunts the kitchens. Spooky or kinky? Spooky. Spooky. Okay. Theooky. Okay. The A513. There's nothing funny about that name. A phantom cyclist is said to appear along a section of this road

between Little Hayward and Ruggerley or Rugeley, riding an old-fashioned bicycle, always in daylight. Oh, I like a daytime ghost. But I think that could just be a person. I could. I bet the bike's old-fashioned, but I suppose it could just be a person. I could. I bet the bike's old-fashioned, but I suppose it could just be a person on an old-fashioned bike. Yeah, it could be a hipster.

But the suspension on those things. We can open it up to hipster, the hipster option. Yeah, that's neither kinky nor spooky. You're right, that's cyclist. Or it could be a kinky hipster that can't afford a car. Birch's Valley, one of the locations of the infamous Black Eyed Child. This is the one that screams to get the attention of the passers-by that we briefly mentioned.

Spooky or kinky? Also spooky. These are all spooky. These are all very spooky, James. Well done. Slitting Mill, which is a horrible place. Ghost of an Elderly Lady killed on the level Crossing has been seen at the scene of her misfortune many

years later spooky or kinky but that's not spooky i mean i feel weird that you asked me whether how saucy an old lady being killed at a level crossing that's that's what happened the ghost major it may just be a coincidence it may just be like um the kinky old lady who's just gets mistaken for a ghost. Fair Oak Pools, haunted by a man wearing a broad-brimmed hat and old-fashioned clothes who bangs a wooden staff on the ground to attract the attention of passers-by. Okay, we know what's in his mind. Yeah, that's kinky. That's got to be kinky. That's definitely slightly saucy behaviour, yes.

Beau Dessert, or Beau Dessert, which I think is French for good pudding. Beau Dessert. The ghost of Beau Dessert's most famous resident, the first Marquis of Anglesey, was seen riding near the site of his old home shortly after World War II. Well, you know what Marquises are like. They're all up to something. So I'm going to say kinky. What's the point of being a minor aristocrat

if you're not getting up to all kinds of stuff? Yes. And running a successful safari park. Yeah, as a sideline. The skies over Cannock Chase is sort of a general one, obviously. Numerous UFO sightings above the chase have been made over the years. In 1990, for example, a moving ball of light was seen and heard by witnesses. Spooky or kinky? Neither, I think and heard by witnesses spooky or kinky um

neither i think it's neither spooky nor kinky i don't think it's a ghost but i also don't think doggers are in the sky i yeah but i think it could be light pollution from all the cars so i think that is a kinky oh yeah okay all right so let's um lean towards Kinky then. The Castle Ring, which I mentioned before, which was quite a chilled out place. That is where the so-called pig man of Cannock Chase has been spotted. And also the ghosts of a young monk from Radmore Priory and a young girl have been seen near the ring. Yeah, very, very spooky, the ring.

The German Military Cemetery, as before this was our first point of contact. Sexiest very, very spooky, the ring. The German military cemetery, as before, this was our first point of contact. Sexiest part of the journey, yes. The German military cemetery, very, very sexy. That's the major sighting point for the werewolf and also a black panther that's said to live on the chase have been reported there. I didn't know about this at the time. Again, not the African-American political group, but an animal. Could just be the werewolf whilst it's, you know, just done its hair, really, couldn't it? Yeah, just a werewolf lying down. Spooky or kinky? I'm going to say spooky. Okay. Witchcraft on the chase. There was a case involving witchcraft reported to officers in 1936.

I mean, that's all I've got here. Well, we can only assume it involved everybody taking their clothes off and leaping about. So I'm going to say kinky. Broadhurst Green and Camp Road. A ghostly paratrooper is seen hanging from his lines in the vicinity whilst the cemetery was being created in the 60s. Right. I'm going to say spooky. You sure?

Is someone hanging? I'm thinking it's... Anyway. Okay. A tall cowled figure standing by the roadside near the cemetery. Well, yeah, we know what that's about now. You saw several cowled figures when you were there. Yes, exactly.

So kinky. Whilst they were unnerving, I don't think they were spooky enough. Paz Warren, unnerving screams heard by walkers in the area, but upon investigation, no sign of their source can be found. Probably a fox, but it could also be people up to all kinds of business. So I'm going to say not spooky. Definitely not spooky. Okay. Brockton, the ghost of a grey So I'm going to say not spooky. Definitely not spooky.

Okay. Brockton, the ghost of a grey lady haunting the grounds of a golf club. Well, you know what golf clubs are like. You know what they get up to in golf clubs, I assume. I don't know. I'm going to say kinky. Yeah. And finally, this is the location where an alien was seen pushing the car up a hill in 1960.

Oh, the spookiest of all. The spookiest encounter you could imagine, an alien pushing a car. His car got broken by how much dogging it was involved in. I don't know what happens. So, Alistair, I don't think we've kink-shamed there. I hope not. I hope we're having the spook shamed. Exactly. Good point.

And I hope we've managed to dance around enough that this was acceptable for children. I don't think it was. I don't think it was. I'm not sure we've managed. I'm not sure we've managed. Should we score? Let's score it. Yeah.

Boom. Okay. I'm ready to pass judgment, but again, in an open-minded kind of way. Okay. First up, naming. Cannock Chase, pretty good. Sounds a little bit like a horse race of some kind, but that's fine. Got a good name. And there were some other great names of places in there,

including Mr. Pursehouse. Yes. Good person's name. And some unnerving names, like Slitting Mill. Ooh, yeah, disgusting. Yeah, Milford, of course. And Milford, of course, who could forget? Beau Dessert.

The Castle Ring is a bit on the nose, as is the German Military Cemetery. I think it's pretty good for names. I'm leaning towards a four, unless you have anything that could... Well, I don't know. The water tower from earlier, that was the pie green tower. The pie green tower.

That is quite good, actually. That's quite spooky. It's got a bit of Children of the Stones about it, the pie green tower. Oh, happy day. We shall meet at the pie green tower, you know? Yeah, exactly. Hmm. But I still think it's a four.

That hasn't quite tipped over the threshold for me. Okay. Well, it's got to be supernatural. Oh, very-ish. Well, is an alien pushing a car actually supernatural? I was surprised as we went round the map that so many of them were coming out as spooky. You're right. The vast majority of those encounters were spooky.

Yeah, I can't argue with that. There were ghosts, grey ladies, alien mechanics, the whole gamut. People searching for alien mechanics. I need a space spark plug. Yeah. So what are we talking? Alien trying to get a bag of crisps out of the little window. It's nighttime and you can't go in the shop. You have to point points to what you want. so what we're talking just alien trying to get a bag of crisps out of the little window it's night time and

you can't go in the shop you have to point points to what you want but they could because of the long finger they would actually probably be quite good they could

push it through the sort of security drawer and be like jeez 20 B&H please don't smoke guys it's not cool

no it's not cool to smoke even if you are an alien especially not in a petrol station it's not cool no it's not cool to smoke even if you are an alien especially not in a petrol station it's not allowed for anyone so um yeah great great advice james and uh i'm i'm gonna say i think it's another four i'm afraid okay that's that's a bit boring but i think it is you know some good solid spooks there but a few dodgy accounts that I don't really believe. My next category is it's canid.

It's canid? As in canine. As in canine? Yeah. So what does canid mean? It just means like dog. Just means dogs. Just means dogs.

Oh, so is it the Latin word for dog? I just want to spice it up because otherwise the category is just dogs. Dogs and dog related. Right, I see. Okay, yeah. You've just classed it up quite a bit by putting it in Latin. Canid. Okay, well, there was a lot of dogging, so let's just move on from that.

But that's substantial. You were searching for a werewolf of the family. They're lupine, but that's substantial. You were searching for a werewolf of the family. They're lupine, but that's ultimately canine. Okay. All right. Yep. Yeah. If we go back in history, that's where dogs came from.

Yeah. So what are we talking? Well, I think with all the dogs we've covered there, it's probably a four, but let's not forget how dogged you and the quantum mechanics and the psychics, you in the mystery machine, I assume, how dogged you spooky teens were going from venue to venue seeing absolutely nothing of note. Yes. Absolutely nothing at all that was in any way worthwhile. I do wonder what, if we hadn't, if we hadn't known it was such a dogging hotspot, we would have been convinced

that there was some sort of conspiracy, man in black type conspiracy. It's not men in black, but more men in red cash guys. Red cash guys following us. Okay, yeah. So it's five. It's five because of how you hounded those ghosts. And in fact,

you were yourself dogged by a red cash guy. We were. My final category is what's the angle here? What is the angle here? Oh, okay. All right.

I love it when there's a question. Explain that category. What is it? What is going on? Is it? Is it someone, some local crusader trying to put all the doggers off by saying that there's these spooking things going on? Is it? Is it someone, some local crusader, trying to put all the doggers off by saying that there's these spooky things going on?

Yes. A classic Scooby-Doo ruse. Scare people away from the old fairground with the story of a phantom. Exactly. Or is it the doggers themselves, like the smugglers of yore, trying to put people off coming there by saying, oh, no, it's pretty spooky. You want to keep away from here. Well, in both saying, oh, no, it's pretty spooky. You want to keep away from here.

Well, in both cases, that's failing because it's attracting people, you at least, to the area. Is it the werewolf itself? And it's not only has it put out all the stories of supernatural stuff to lure in the unsuspecting supernaturals, it's also going on the dogging forums and saying, there's some very poorly lit lay-bys around here

with little to no police presence, if you know what I mean. You know, we've come across there's clearly a code that goes on. I think there's another possibility, which is that these stories are being put about by the doggers in the interest of the paranormal investigator

to dog a pipeline. Oh, really? It's a gateway. And they're hoping that once you're there, it'll be a sort of when in Rome situation. Because you've got to get, people have got to start somewhere, I suppose. That's a very good point.

I mean, yeah. So hunting the werewolf is a gateway drug. So that's, fortunately, that's a fourth angle that you supply there, because I only had three. In that case, it's four, isn't it? It's another four.

I mean, I want to do a four-play pun, but I feel... Cut the music. Go on, stop. Let's turn this off. This has been the filthiest episode. We nearly managed it

without any saucy words. So, yeah, pretty saucy. Oh, that's one of the sauciest episodes ever. Yes. Since Scratching Fanny of Cock Lane, I'd say. Possibly, yeah. Oh, actually, Alistair, let's do a record scratch. On the subject of scratches.

Oh, he's got a row there we go that's that records are right off now i've scratched the mp3 quite badly got a lot of stuff to plug there james i've got a lot of plugs here first of all the quantum mechanics my compatriots on the on the mission to canik chase please check out their podcast where you've got the live recordings that we did while we were scared like little boys uh in a field in the dark and also now you might recognize these deputies sunil patel and chris cantrell yeah i've heard them got a new podcast are they a new podcast it podcast? It's called Rural Concerns. It's a spicy meatball.

Okay. What kind of meat is that? That's not any recognisable meat. You don't want to ask too many questions. All right. And it is all vaguely held together by a wonderful producer who goes by the name of James and has a very melodious voice. I like the sound of this guy.

Yeah, me too. He sounds like the glue that keeps that podcast together. He seems like the spice that holds that meatball together. Here's a little clip of him doing just that. So what should we do for the first bit? I'll just find a point where we can cut into the conversation, just start talking. What's balatro? Oh, well, we can talk about the conversation. Just start talking. What's Balatro?

Oh, well, we can talk about that. What is it? Just tell me what Balatro is. Would we do that? Just start. I think we're going to cut in halfway through the conversation. So just start doing that conversation. Okay.

Yes. Are we recording the video? No. Could we record the video too? I think that went badly last time. I know, but I'm in a quest for content. So let's start the conversation. Let's go.

40 minutes from now. Yeah, but what is Balatro? Is that how I'm pronouncing it? Is that right? I don't know. I bought it. Let me. Is it a chocolate?

It's not a chocolate, but it's sweeter than any chocolate I've ever tasted in my life. Is it just sugar? The caramel. Bellatro is a video game. That sounds really good. Oh, thanks. I almost feel like I recognise those voices. Yeah, it's weird, isn't it?

He's got one of them voices, that guy. Just one of those everyman voices. I was going to do a Chris Cantrell impression, but I'm not sure I can with this sore throat. Have you got anything else to plug there, James? Just our Patreon at patreon.com forward slash lawmen pod, where you get access to loads of bonus episodes over 80 at the latest count, plus access to the Law Folk Discord,

where you can chat to like-minded law folk who thank you very much for supporting us, already support us. Yeah, thank you. And thank you very much to Joe for editing this episode. Thank you very much to you for listening. Give us a like in one of the places where you can like us. In fact, it was one of the law folk

who came up with the brilliant tagline for our Uncanny Japan episode, which was bloody hell, Jim Menken. That is fantastic. Bringing two completely separate things together in the form of wordplay. So well done, Sasha, for that. Thank you for that brilliant pun. Right, I'm going to unscratch the MP3.

We're back on. Okay. There we go. Well, thank you very much, everyone. See you next time. Bye. Hear you next time? Dun everyone. See you next time. Bye. Hear you next time? I don't know. Hear you next time.

You hear us next time. Yeah, that's the one. That sounds normal. Yeah. It's a dog soldier's meat, sex lives of the potato man, really, isn't it? Yeah, but you wouldn't get Mackenzie Crook these days.