Mark Bell's Power Project - MBSS EP. 37 - How To React to "Bad" News

Episode Date: January 29, 2022

There's been a lot of moaning and groaning over the past two years. Some of it caused by really bad news and while we aren't trying to diminish your experiences, we are here to help you handle receiving "bad" news. Special perks for our listeners below! ➢Bubs Naturals: https://bubsnaturals.com Use code POWERPROJECT for 20% of your next order! ➢Vertical Diet Meals: https://verticaldiet.com/ Use code POWERPROJECT for 20% off your first order! ➢Vuori Performance Apparel: Visit https://vuoriclothing.com/powerproject to automatically save 20% off your first order! ➢8 Sleep: Visit https://www.eightsleep.com/powerproject to automatically save $150 off the Pod Pro! ➢Marek Health: https://marekhealth.com Use code POWERPROJECT10 for 10% off ALL LABS! Also check out the Power Project Panel: https://marekhealth.com/powerproject Use code POWERPROJECT for $101 off! ➢Piedmontese Beef: https://www.piedmontese.com/ Use Code POWER at checkout for 25% off your order plus FREE 2-Day Shipping on orders of $150 Subscribe to the Podcast on on Platforms! ➢ https://lnk.to/PowerProjectPodcast Subscribe to the Power Project Newsletter! ➢ https://bit.ly/2JvmXMb Follow Mark Bell's Power Project Podcast ➢ Insta: https://www.instagram.com/markbellspowerproject ➢ https://www.facebook.com/markbellspowerproject ➢ Twitter: https://twitter.com/mbpowerproject ➢ LinkedIn:https://www.linkedin.com/in/powerproject/ ➢ YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/markbellspowerproject ➢TikTok: http://bit.ly/pptiktok FOLLOW Mark Bell ➢ Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/marksmellybell ➢ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/MarkBellSuperTraining ➢ Twitter: https://twitter.com/marksmellybell ➢ Snapchat: marksmellybell ➢Mark Bell's Daily Workouts, Nutrition and More: https://www.markbell.com/ Follow Nsima Inyang ➢ https://www.breakthebar.com/learn-more ➢YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/c/NsimaInyang ➢Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/nsimainyang/?hl=en ➢TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@nsimayinyang?lang=en Follow Andrew Zaragoza on all platforms ➢ https://direct.me/iamandrewz #PowerProject #Podcast #MarkBell

Okay, now I hit record. Okay. You did. I did. Yep, I can see the time ticker, tick, tick, tick thing going. You're going to start getting reduction pay. Again? Every time that you don't hit the button.

Okay. So what if I just hit the button even when we're not recording? Do I get a bonus? It doesn't work that way. Are you sure? Yeah. I got to talk to HR. We haven't even told anybody about like what's happening with

the podcast by the way i don't think people need to know okay yeah there you go they don't need to know about this i did say it on twitter or not twitter on instagram but people aren't ready for this kind of heat i mean they're just not you know it's it's still the winter so that's true you know i mean before i mess things up they They're not ready for this global warming thing that we're going to dump on everybody. It is frustrating when an emcee of sorts will be like, oh, you guys ain't ready for that. It's like, I mean. Let me determine that. Yeah, I think I'm pretty physically prepared for just about anything.

Like maybe you should, I don't know, throw it out there, see if I can handle it. It's going to be so sick. You're not going to be able to digest it, bro. Yeah, I know. I'm just like, can I have some good news today? Like, nope. Nope. Okay. it it's gonna be so sick you're not gonna be able to i can go digest it bro yeah i know right i'm just like can i have some good news today like nope nope okay well that's that's fine because that's gonna lead us to what today's uh saturday school is about and uh we kind of alluded to it welcome class oh yeah welcome loser is a big word i don't even know if i use it correctly

i almost texted it to you guys the other day and i was like, I think I'm going to fuck that up. So I'm going to say hinted. That's what I used. But on a previous episode, we hinted about bringing up this topic. And the topic came to me because my mother was diagnosed with stage three cancer. interpretation and with some of the stoicism philosophies and stuff. You know, stoicism will say something along the lines of like, there's no such thing as good and bad news. It's how you interpret that information. But every once in a while you hear some shit like your mother having stage three cancer and it's like, you can't be like, oh, let me interpret it this way differently. It hits you and it's like, fuck dude, that that's some bad news. Nobody wants to hear that shit. So for today's topic, I wanted to ask you how can somebody hear or take in bad news and not just let it completely flip the world upside down? Yeah, I think number one, you have to kind of go and understand that everything is a choice. I guess I'll just stick with my own beliefs.

I don't know what other people believe, but I believe that everything's a choice and that you have a choice on how you react. You have a choice on how you absorb and how you interpret the world around you. And, you know, in the case of like, you know, somebody having cancer or you. And, you know, in the case of like, you know, somebody having cancer or you get news that someone dies, um, you have every right to like react and interpret it whatever

way you feel is best for you. Um, but I think we also, there also has to be like some attachment to being being reasonable. Because if you were to think of the pain of losing a child, I remember they interviewed Mike Tyson, and Mike Tyson had that really terrible accident where his daughter died on a treadmill or something like that. Anyway, when that happened, they asked him about it and they were and I was like are you you know doing any better now are you okay and he's like no he and he said like he's like for a month I did cocaine I did this I did that and it's

like well how do you you know so okay for him we're lucky that he was able to figure out a way to come back but now you have the tragedy of like losing one person now you might have a tragedy of like losing one person. Now you might have a tragedy of having another person die because of the way that they reacted to what happened. Because it was, you know, it was hard or difficult for them to interpret it any other way. And they thought that would be in their best interest to go and just do wild shit to try to, I guess, fill in the pain and fill in the gaps. Right. And maybe they didn't feel like they had an option. shit to try to, I guess, fill in the pain and fill in the gaps, right?

And maybe they didn't feel like they had an option. But what I would like to share with everybody today is I think that you always have an option on how you react to stuff and how you kind of put this kind of stuff forward, even though it can be difficult. even though it can be difficult. I think one thing that's been really helpful to me over the years in hearing bad news or tragic news, you allow yourself to feel what you need to feel. You're not trying to turn yourself into a robot. Human emotion, it's important for us to have that.

And so while I do talk about equanimity and balance, you also don't necessarily, it also might not necessarily be great or understood by others. If somebody says, hey, Mark, your mother died and you have literally no reaction, they might think, okay, maybe he didn't hear me. Maybe he's in shock. Maybe he doesn't understand what happened. And truthfully for me, like when my mom did die, my interpretation of that, I walked through it quickly, you know? So first of all, I'm thinking, oh my God, like this is so sad for my dad. Like I wasn't, you know, okay, mom's gone. I know she was in pain. So rest in peace really is really what I thought. Like, that's great. She doesn't have to, my mom was like a tortured person in a way because of the way that she

interpreted the world and the way that a lot of things unfolded in her life. So her life was complicated. And so I thought, that's great. That all that pain is severed. It's gone. She doesn't have to deal with that anymore. And she doesn't have to feel that way anymore. So at least my understanding of what death is, I got no idea about any of it. And then, yeah, I thought about like my dad and like, okay, well now what's my dad's life going to be? And that's really when you can get yourself really upset is when you start to think about other people around you. Because it's normally for yourself, for yourself, it's like the only time I guess we really get real sad for our, the only time we get sad is like on our own behalf. It was when we have a pity party, you know, and you can get really sad and be like, oh, man, I wish things were, I wish my eyes weren't going or I wish I could, you know, I don't know, whatever, whatever the hell your fucking problem is, you just have a pity party about it.

I wish I could read better. I'm kind of dumb. People don't like me that way. You know, that's, that is really easy to get down in the dumps about. And I think most people do, right? Yeah. But I think, you know, in trying to figure out how to, you know, climb out of these circumstances or situations, you know, for me, I just try to think about it in a rational sense. So I got news that my mom died, or you getting news that your mother has cancer.

It's like, okay, well, let's figure out what's helpful. How much do I know about cancer? I don't know shit. So let me talk to, I believe they're called like an oncologist, right? That's someone that studies, that's a doctor that knows about these things. Okay, what does she need to have done? And then I think the first area where people's minds should gravitate towards whenever something bad, quote-unquote bad, happens or there's something that could be easily interpreted as being bad happens, you want to try to through like, okay, she's got cancer. She's got to go to the doctor. Who's going to take her? What does that look like? Maybe I can volunteer.

Maybe it's not great if my dad has to do that all the time or, you know, you start to walk yourself through these different things. And so I think as bad as things can be, and as bad as some news can be sometimes, I think there's always different perspectives and different ways of looking at things. And try to get yourself to higher ground and try to balance yourself out for a bit and just say, you know what? From what I know of life, it appears that all situations are solvable in some way. You might not be able to find an exact solution that gets rid of a problem forever. Like you have a child and they have something wrong with their heart. They might have a medical condition where they, you know, it's horrible. They always have this thing wrong with their heart. But like, what's their life going to be?

Like, does their brain work? Does, what are the things that they have? And what are things that people can do to ensure that this kid still has an amazing life? You know, so you try to just, you try to hear the information. This news is really horrible. But then you also don't want to necessarily interpret that stuff as if you're like three years old or five years old. I don't think anybody in the world would fault you for running and screaming and jumping on the ground and throwing a tantrum and turning red and crying and saying, I hate you. Why'd you let the dog out of the house?

And going in your room and crying for hours and even being upset for like a couple of days and stuff makes – just totally makes sense. Your brain is not developed. When you're 35 and something like that happens, I just think that it's not necessarily helpful. Not that it's not helpful to have emotions. Emotions can be helpful. But it's not helpful to have the emotions pull you in a direction downward for so long. Maybe you're bummed for a little while. Maybe that dog really meant something to you or that family member. And maybe you're having a hard time figuring out what the next steps are. But you probably have friends. You can probably get therapy. These things are solvable. So for me personally, that's where my mind goes.

Where did your mind go when you got the news about your mom? I mean, yeah, I did get sad because we were on the phone. It was me, my brother, sister, and my mom. And, you know, just, I tried to, I guess, utilize some of these like stoic teachings and stuff. And so like, I instantly just went straight to like, it's, we're going to be fine. Like, no matter what happens, we're going to be fine. And it was right before Christmas. And I was just like, this isn't your last Christmas. So stop acting, you know, like it's going to be doom and gloom. Cause that was like, her main thing was like, I wanted to tell you guys so that way we

really enjoy this Christmas. I'm like, we're going to enjoy this Christmas and the next one and the next one. Like this isn't it. And then what, um, sometimes like I'll just like, I'll start either writing like in a notebook. It hasn't been a notebook in a long time. I shouldn't say that, but I'll just start typing on my phone, uh, just getting my thoughts out. And I ended up somehow sending a gigantic text to my brother and sister. And I'll summarize it by just saying, like, I have zero doubt in my mind that she's going to, you know, that she's not going to survive this. Or did I double negative it? I know for a fact that she's going to survive this. I'm like, yes, I'm sad that she's going to experience a lot of doctor visits, a lot of

uncomfortable times for like the foreseeable future. That's what her life is going to consist of i'm sad about that i'm not sad at all at the thought of losing her it's like what benefit is it to me that i am like i don't know like this might happen you know this might be it like do i really at the end of this all do i want to be that person that's like see i told you so i was the one that was saying i don't think it's gonna that she's gonna make it like fuck no like nobody wants to be that person that's like, see, I told you so. I was the one that was saying, I don't think it's going to, that she's going to make it like, fuck no. Like nobody wants to be that person. So instead I'm like, guys, there's no doubt in my mind whatsoever that she's going to survive this. Like she's going to kick cancer's ass. And then at some point we're all going to be celebrating when her doctor says, congratulations, you are cancer free. So I text that to my brother

and sister, uh, different words. But I'm just like, I encourage you to join me in this thought process because if we are all on the same page, we can rub this all off on mom. So that way she believes it too. Because my first thought was I ordered You Are the Placebo by Joe Dispenza. I sent that to her right away. I'm just like, she can read English, but I'm like,, uh, her, you know, she can read English, but I'm like, Hey, if you have trouble, like I'll read it to you. It doesn't matter. Um, so I had her start reading that and my dad's reading it. Cause he's probably the worst one. I have to convince everybody. Cause he's the way he's speaking. He's like, if we, this, if we,

that I'm like, no, just like, we're going to get through it. No big deal. So, excuse me, having some of these, uh, within you, some of these within you hydration electrolytes. These are delicious. MarkBellSlingShot.com, highly recommend it. But that's where my mind went to right away. It was just like, this ain't it. You guys need to be 100% positive. I was like, not even just be positive, but just understand and know for a fact that she's not going to die from this. for a fact that she's not going to die from this. And regardless of what happens, this helps everything. It helps her be less anxious. It helps her, you know, feel better. It 100% changed me like instantly. As soon as I said it out loud, it was hard for me to say out loud, actually. I text it and then I try to read it to my wife and like, you know, I'm like breaking up and I'm

just like, nope. The more I say it, the easier it is to say, the more I believe it, the more true it's going to be. So what's today? Today's January 24th. I'm saying it right now. My mom's going to survive cancer. No question in my mind. And since I've decided that that was true, it's been a lot easier to call her on the phone to talk to her. How are things going today? Versus before it was just like, oh fuck. You're like, oh, she's having a good day. My son's birthday a lot easier to call her on the phone to talk to her. How are things going today versus before? It was just like, oh, fuck. You're like, oh, she's having a good day. My son's birthday was Friday. We went over there. We had a blast. She had such a great day. She was doing so good. It didn't matter what was going on inside her body. It was just a fucking phenomenal day.

And we're going to have many more of those days. So yeah, long story. That's exactly where I went to as soon as I heard the news that she had cancer. Yeah, I think everything in life is, you know, is like a skill set. You know, you have a skill set to be able to put your energy somewhere else or put your focus somewhere else or like, what does it hurt? It doesn't hurt anything to be positive. Um, we know how detrimental it can be to be negative. I mean, being positive seems like it, it can yield, help yield a net positive too with things like the placebo effect. But I think also too, there's something just about, um, not harnessing any more negativity. Like, how much more beneficial is it to, you know, go over to your mom's house and have everything be all dark and have everybody like, oh, you know, she's really sick or,

you know, just keeping everything real. Like, that doesn't seem, that seems like very unproductive, you know. That seems like very unproductive. And even regardless of how you view it, being positive doesn't hurt. Like strength is never a weakness, right? Having more strength going into something is not hurtful or harmful. Having more positivity going into something, I guess there could be one area where you could say like, well, it's good to also be like rational and make sure that you're not completely ignoring, you know, you don't want to ignore medical advice because you're trying to be so positive like that

you just go on your life oblivious to information that your body is going through a stressful time. So there's like that one small thing, right? But I think that that is a small thing, and I don't think it's anything to really have your focus on. I think in your dad's case, I think if you can take someone that's pessimistic and try to have them be more optimistic, so if he says whens and ifs and stuff, I don't think those are too bad because what he's doing, he's preparing himself. He wants to be prepped for any circumstance, right?

And that's very smart. And the reason why it's smart is because death is a part of life. Everyone will die. You know, I think that fuck your elbow video, the reason why it resonates so much with people is because that's what I said in the video. We're all heading there. We will all be in pain someday. We are all going to die. I was actually just thinking like I should reread that for the podcast.

That would be just a really awesome thing that we can clip that we can do some cool stuff with. But we are all going to die. Death is a part. I have known that my mom was going to die for a couple decades now. My brother lived a very chaotic life. My uncle lived the same life, and he died because of it too. I've had many friends die from drug abuse, painkillers and things like that, being a professional wrestler for a few years. And so it's not your 25-year-old friend that dies of drugs,

of a drug overdose. That's the only person that can die. Yeah, he's rolling the dice a little bit more. But your neighbor that's 25 years old that doesn't do anything wrong, that's just coming back from college trying to get a job as an insurance agent who seems like an awfully awesome person could fucking die for no reason. Like, you don't know why. Sometimes people just die. So one of the stoic philosophies that has resonated a lot with me was to just bury everybody in your head. I have had funerals for every single person that I know.

You know, and I've gone pretty far down that rabbit hole. I've done a lot of weird shit that is too weird to probably even talk about. I have written out what it would be like if this person was dead. I've wrote out.

It's horrible. It's fucking horrible. But you know what's more horrible is not ever being prepared for stuff. Everybody that you know is going to die. And they could just randomly die right now. Like that sucks. Sucks to say, right? But they could.

And so then you have to figure out like, well, what are you going to do with that information? Are you going to act like a psychopath? Because that doesn't seem to make any sense. Um, depending on, you know, where your beliefs are when someone dies, um, that person is like no longer available to the people that we have here, you know? Um, and so all you can do is figure out a way to like go on with what you're doing and the people that you have that are still here. And so I think that that is where some of the pain comes in is like, you're not really necessarily sad that the person died. You're sad that the person's not there anymore.

You can't experience them in the same way as you used to. And then no one else can experience them in the same way as you used to. And then no one else can experience them in the same way that they used to either. But an interesting thing happens when somebody dies that is also forgotten about. The person gets memorialized in a weird way. And some of the negative things that were about them, those things tend to subside. The fat of that gets trimmed off and you end up with just the kind of meat and the substance of that person. My brother was a fucking nightmare.

He was a wreck. He really was. He was a wrecking machine. He was a violent person. He wasn't always a good person to be around. He was super negative. And like, oh, I got, it's hard to spit these words out, but he was like kind of a disgusting person in a lot of ways because he was addicted to drugs and because his life was run by drugs, alcohol. And he was he also had some mental health issues.

So he didn't think the same way as everybody else. And he had many days and many nights that he just wasn't proud of. I mean, he would like wake up on a couch and he would be full of urine because he'd like peed the cat, you know, like just, just shit like that was very, very common. And he wasn't even a person that as I got older and had kids, he wasn't even really welcome around the house and stuff. And my wife and I have had conversations. We're like, look, we're not, you know, we, we can't, he's not uncle mad dog's not watching our kids. You know what I mean? Like he's not in a safe spot to do that. But like most of those things, I don't really think about those

things anymore. All I think about is like how much I love my brother and how excited and happy I am that he taught me how to lift. And then I now get to teach other people how to lift. You know, that's what I remember. And he was my big brother. He was my protector. He was my childhood hero. You know, those are the things that stick out more. And all that other stuff.

And same thing with my mother. My mother, you know, I remember my mom now more from when I was a younger kid rather than thinking about her. Um, cause later on in her life, she was just in a lot of pain. She was abused when she was a kid. Um, she had alcoholic parents. She just, she just had a shitty, shitty, shitty upbringing that unfortunately she never got herself past, but she got herself past it enough so that it didn't really, well, maybe it did it negative. I guess it negatively impacted everybody. And so there you go. My grandfather, my mom's dad, was such a piece of shit that that negativity rippled through the whole family. And you could say that it killed my brother in a way

and almost killed Chris too. And that's how strong negativity is. And the positivity from my dad's side, which is pretty damn positive. I mean, just because I'm saying that people are positive, I'm not trying to paint a picture that one is perfect and the other one's bad necessarily. But the positivity from the Bell side of the family is huge.

Like everyone's super supportive. We all talk shit and there's like family drama and all that stuff too. But a lot of love, you know, that's all. People are just there. Everybody's very, very supportive. Everyone does really well. Everyone works their face off. There's like, yeah, everyone, everyone does really well. Everyone works their face off. Um, there's like, yeah, everyone, everyone is, uh, it's, it's very, very, uh, positive. And so you can see the, you know, how it, how life is lived.

And the reason why my grandfather was the way that he was, was because, well, what he blamed it on was that he, so he was a police officer. That job is really stressful, so he needs to drink. He has to drink, right? You have to, when something's stressful, you have to have alcohol because that's a great solution to that, right? Or when something's really stressful, you have to overeat and get fat and all those things, right? Yeah, if something's on fire, throw some gasoline on it. Yeah, it's going to be great. Let's throw some coal on there and let's get some marshmallows going um yeah you're just adding fuel to the to the flame but my grandfather's

interpretation of his uh eight-year-old daughter ter having leukemia, was to fuck up his entire family for the rest of his life until the day he died. When he could have been the person that they were all looking for and the person that they all needed, and he could have said, you know what? She died, but everybody else in this house is going to be safe. I'm your dad. You can count on me. I'm going to do the best I can. You might see me cry. You might see me punch a couple holes in the wall. I might act a little bit weird for a while, but we're going to be good. You know what I mean? Whatever speech he would have to give the family or whatever, he could have done that.

He could have gone that way. But instead, that was his interpretation of it. He ended up becoming an alcoholic. My grandmother struggled with it. They fought a lot. The boys were abused. Because the boys were abused, my mom had a bunch of weird shit happen to her as well. And it's just, you know, you can see the negative impact of that. Like, and you can reverse your way out of it by having, and unfortunately, maybe my grandfather didn't have like a skill set to figure out what to do about that. Maybe if he was active, you know, maybe he was a physical person, he said, you know what?

Fuck this. I'm pissed. I'm going to the gym. I'm going to punch a heavy bag for three hours or whatever. You know, like maybe he would have, or if he was a runner, you know, or if he, you know, was a triathlete or a lifter or whatever, he could have maybe baggaged up all those problems and said, this is life is fucking ugly. I hate it. I hate myself. I hate the position that I'm in, but I'm going to go and work through this shit somehow. I'm going to lift through it. I'm going to run through it. I'm going to go and work through this shit somehow. I'm going to lift through it. I'm going to run through it.

I'm going to go figure this stuff out because the weight of all this is way too heavy for the rest of my family to endure. But as the man of the house, I'm going to go carry this shit around the block for a while. And when I come back, I'm going to have my shit figured out enough to where I can help everybody else too.

But that's not the way it went down. And you can see the cascade of negativity that ended up rippling through the way it went down. And you can see, you know, the cascade of negativity that ended up like rippling through the whole family. Yeah, that's wild to think that something that your grandfather did affected his grandchild, right? Like that's fucking crazy how negativity can, it's like a, you know, it's a cancer, you know, it'll just run through you.

But I got to see two different ways that life was lived by watching my grandfather on one side and watching my grandfather on the other side. I was like, my grandfather, my dad's dad, he's like really short. He was like five feet tall, you know? And my grandmother's short, like the Bell family's pretty short.

So my grandfather, like he had that short guy thing, you know, he was, so my grandfather, like he had that short guy thing, you know, he, he was, so he couldn't figure out anything else cause he wasn't like a physical presence. Um, but he was a fighter, like literally he was a boxer. He was a golden gloves boxer. He did really well. He was in the Navy. He was somebody that just, he's like, I can't figure out a lot of other shit, but I'm going to be, I'm going to have a lot of grit. I'm going to figure out shit in whatever way I can. So he was good with his hands. He was a mechanic, and he was going to wake up earlier than everybody.

He was going to just work 16 hours every day and just do that every day just to make sure things went the way they went, and he was always pretty positive. He wasn't always happy. He was like, you know, kind of grumpy because he worked so much. But like the way I remembered him, I remembered him being very happy. But my dad and when he was like kind of managing the house, he was a little grumpy here and there. But his way of fixing everything was through work.

He made his, especially his sons, he didn't do as good a job with the girls, but he made his sons work their ass off. Everyone had to work. He would, you know, the kind of person that would make them go dig ditches for no reason, then he'd be like, yeah, fill it back in, you know? Like, what was the point of that?

To show you how hard it is to dig a ditch. Like, what else do you need to learn from that, you know? It ain't easy, you know? It's a hard lesson to learn. It's a hard lesson to learn. Yeah. For some of the, because you mentioned a little bit about this a little bit ago, about like the, kind of like the why me, like why has this got to happen to me?

Why has this got to happen to my mom? What's some advice for somebody that maybe my that maybe you might be feeling like you know like well i'll just use my mom as an example you know super sweet lady you know she was always kind of when we were like we didn't give a fuck about diet and nutrition and stuff she would always reach for like the the chicken sandwich when we're getting like the hamburger with bacon uh didn't really eat the pizza she would have like a slice or two once in a while, but she would always have the big salad, diet sodas and that sort of thing. And here she is with cancer when my dad who drank a lot, never gave a fuck. He had open heart surgery. He's still ticking.

He's just fine. But you know, my mom's got cancer now and we could all easily be like, why her? And she could easily be why me? She's not, thank goodness. But if somebody is, maybe what's some advice and maybe a are in their life or place judgment on somebody for them reacting to something that we wouldn't consider to be that painful. You know, or something because it's easy to do that. It's easy to like mock somebody. Oh, the guy only deadlifts 135. Like it's, but that's what the person deadlifts. Like that's their strongest effort for now. Like that's what their, that's their capacity for deadlifting at the moment. And there's no reason to, there's no reason to get judgy of that. And when, when it comes to like pain or when it comes to things that, of happen to us, I think that we have a tendency to think that this person doesn't understand me.

They don't understand my pain. You don't know what it's like. You know, like that's a teenager thing, right? Like teenagers would say like, you don't know what it's like. You don't know what it's like to be me. Teenagers would say, like, you don't know what it's like. You don't know what it's like to be me. And then a parent could easily say, well, yeah, I do because I was 13 or I was – but you don't understand.

It's different now, you know, and that's what people will say. And as you mature, you actually, why was my dad born with bad knees and bad hips and my brother the same way? You know, I don't think anyone has answers to those things, you know, why one person gets cancer over another. over another. Hopefully we do find out more information about that so we can help because cancer is just crappy. It takes way too many people's lives and hopefully we can figure out remedies for it. But I think one thing that I've been trying to share more recently is that, and this comes from myself too, if I'm sharing a pain with you, if I'm saying, man, my knee is really like fucked up, then you start saying, well, what about some of the stuff from Ben Patrick? I tried it, man. That's just not working. My knee is like really

jacked up. Like I just want to keep complaining and I just want to keep in this thing. And you're throwing out really reasonable solutions, you know? And usually the way that it works, especially with myself, I'll be negative and I'll be in that negative loop just like everybody else. But I'll think about it later and I'll go, God damn it, Andrew. Andrew's kind of right, man. If I want to fix my knee, then I'm going to have to actually do a lot of work, and I'm going to have to actually fix my knee. And Seamless was talking about those 10-minute squats. I haven't done those in a long time. He was talking about using the slant board. Nah,

if I'm being honest, I did it for like three weeks. You know what I mean? Then you start to kind of, but you have to be a reasonable person, and you have to be able to continue to learn and to continue to kind of have this white belt mentality where you can continue to solve problems for yourself. So whatever pain that you're in, understand that it's solvable. It might not go away completely because like what you have could be a disease. It could be an autoimmune disorder it could be whatever but like look at the people that we know that have had miraculous changes from following a carnivore diet using some sort of dietary intervention they get off their medications they no longer have high blood pressure. They no longer have diabetes.

Can't beat everything with food, but a lot of shit can get beat with food because it can help change our mood. And when you're in a better mood, just everything else in life gets enhanced a ton. And instead though, we, we've reached for a drug for that often, and that, I think, it doesn't work that way. For longer term, for more happiness, it has to be earned, and it has to be something that you are working for and towards and on all the time. You can get it in like a shot. You can take it here and there and you can do that. But it works best when you're already in a good mood. When you're already kind of awake and you have a cup of coffee,

blast off to the moon. You feel fucking great. You can take on the day. But if you're tired and you have coffee, it doesn't really do much for you. So that's the way I kind of look at a lot of stuff. You've got to really be, you know, strong and to be even more weird, like maybe cancer landed on your mom because she's the strongest person in the family. You know what I mean? Like God or whomever was like,

if anyone can blast this thing out, it's going to be her. Yeah. That's, I did mention something like that when she told us on the phone because, you know, she basically hasn't eaten in like a year. You know, she's like no solid foods because she can't keep anything down because something is preventing food from going down her stomach. And it's like, we don't know what it is. And so I'm like, well, now they're not now they're not gonna be like i wonder what it could be maybe we'll do another test we'll do another x-ray or whatever it may be i'm like now we know so like let's get let's take care of this so that's that's kind of the i wouldn't say like silver lining of it all but that's like where my brain went to right away it was like well cool now

we know who we're up against let's go to work um one thing that i did because i used to be this person where i would hear you know a story like your mom your brother or just like i you know i followed a lot of sports i'd hear a lot of stories about people overcoming these crazy obstacles but in my life i didn't really have anything like that you know at least i didn't really think about it at the time and so like uh i guess kind of lightening the conversation a little bit here, what I would allow myself to, what I would allow to happen to myself is I'd watch a game on Sunday, Niners win. I'm fucking celebrating like I just, like I won the Super Bowl, even though it was just like week two. They lose. I'm having the worst fucking week ever.

Like, it would consume me. It would control everything. So that's obviously on a much lighter note, but this is something that a lot of people go through. Not a lot of people have, you know, their mother have cancer or something like that, right? But a lot of people will hear some stupid news like, oh, fuck, like there's a crash on I-5,

so I'm going to have to take a different route to work. Like, and they'll let that kill them. Or I'm a cowboys fan and they just lost to the weather the niners again i just had to rub that in there uh but yeah the weather whatever it may be they'll let that just just take over their day their week or whatever i was gonna go on a walk and it fucking started raining man uh what the fuck you know what am i supposed to do now? F this, F that. It's like, whoa, hey. Yeah, first off, what do you think it is that causes that? I'm sure you have something to say about that.

But also, like, I don't know, man, how can we stop being such bitches? You know, awareness is critical. So whenever I hear somebody that is complaining, I like to point out't had time to do this or do that. And they're addressing something that they're actually frustrated about. So you can kind of point to and say, oh, that's actually very mindful of you that you're aware that your time is being compromised. And then just continue to follow stuff up with questions, I think, is really helpful. What do you think would be something that might free up your time more

so that you can get to read those books or you can be more prepared for your podcast? You don't feel so tired. And they might go on and they might continue to. But a lot of times, if you keep asking questions, they'll start to come up with solutions on their own. And, but if you have negativity, they're going to keep refuting everything that you say, you know. And so I think, but so you have to do that internally as well. You have to do that with yourself, like your own talk to yourself. You know, how do i stop eating

sweets at night um you need to stop that uh well that's you're already kind of aware of it but the fact that you brought it up the fact that you said you need to stop that that's great you recognizing a problem now what's a way to address it? Well, to completely eliminate it and to get mad at yourself for every time that you fail is not a great way to do it. Instead, the way that I look at things rather than thinking about failing at something, I just think it's for lack of knowledge and or wisdom or implementation of that knowledge in that particular moment. Because it's a moment, right? And a moment, it doesn't last very long. So if you kind of recognize that like anything that you're going through is a moment, you could think back years ago to somebody that you really loved or admired, you know, this girl or admired, you know,

this girl or whatever, right? How quickly can your mind, uh, your value assignment to something or somebody change so quickly? Um, somebody cheats on you, you get dumped.

Like it's, they were everything to you for a minute. And then like, it just fucking, it like disappeared. And then there's like hurt and it takes a while. Right. But then time a minute and then like, it just fucking, it like disappeared. And then there's like hurt and it takes a while. Right. But then time happens and you're like three years later,

you're like, that person was a fucking piece of shit. Like fuck that person. You know what I mean? Like, and that's not a great place to be either, but you get my point. It's like,

you went from really like, that was somebody that you yeah you loved them you had all this hurt for them and now you could give a flying fuck about them now you can kind of have your interpretations of just about anything be that way um why someone would choose to have a football team or uh a uf UFC fight or something really drive that too hard. Like I don't, I kind of think it's, I just think it's dumb. I don't have any other good way of like putting it. I don't think it's, if you're a younger person and you're doing it and you're a teenager or something,

that's, I think when you're younger, if you're below the age of like 25, fucking have at it. If you're 45 and you're just so reliant upon whether this team wins or loses, and also too, like people get together for games and they drink and they do this, they do that, right?

But then if the team loses, like, now you're really going to drink. But if the team wins, now you're really going to drink but if the team wins now you're really going to drink it's like you're going to go off in that in that same direction either way you know you're going to be just i don't know i think a lot of times we uh we we put such high value assignment on these things and we're so disappointed when they don't work out that way. For me, what's been helpful for me is to live a life where I, it's pretty expectation-free. Having people try to meet standards and stuff, that's different.

That is a different thing. I could still be disappointed. You know, I think that's fine. I think having disappointment, there's still something that you could do where I'd be like, oh, that's weird. That shocks me. Andrew's not normally like that.

That is kind of disappointing. Like he's been this way all the time. But I also wouldn't be like so shocked by it. You know what I mean? I'd be like, well, he's human, you mean i'd be like well he's human you know fuck like shit happens all of us or whatever um but i think i think that we we for some reason we just we want to have this value assignment so attached to this person or this thing or this team that uh we're so reliant upon their success and And that's like part of, uh, that's like a

manifestation of how we feel inside. And I just think that's not a great way to live your life. Yeah. It is so crazy. The difference that I, and the change I've made, you know, in the past couple of years, because like I said, I would go as my team would go. And now I look at it and I just, I do I laugh at myself you know kind of what you were just saying you know like I remember being so sad at like a Super Bowl loss NFC championship loss like I have Encima cracks up because I will tell him like certain players that did something to the Niners or whatever you know he just cracks up but now I'm just like if they win this is fucking awesome if they lose nothing changes and I'll still kick ass tomorrow.

It does not matter whatsoever. Think about it. I mean, it's really irrational, right? It's so irrational. Because, like, you know, like, I'm from New York, you know, and I grew up, like, a Jets fan, and, like, we'd joke around about it, and they always sucked. But, like, the Jets aren't, like, the ultimate representation of New York. Right. Those players on the team, they're not even from New York.

They don't give a fuck about New York. They don't give a fuck about New York. They don't give a fuck. Yeah, it's these different people, they play in these different areas because they got, you know, they're getting paid, right? And then even your college and stuff,

the college stuff makes a little bit more sense because you're like, I went to that school. Like, i know that school's badass and it's like school spirit like you can get a little more connected to it i guess so but also when they're not too crazy you know when you're you're not on the team and when you're 45 years old hoping that an 18 year old or i don't even know how 20 something year old you know it's like you're putting a lot of stock in a kid. Enjoy your college football. I know how gigantic it is. I'm not talking too much shit about it. But also don't allow that to dictate whether or not your family likes you around.

And if you are that way, just understand it's irrational. That's fair. I'm not trying to say you're a dick. I'm not trying to be you're a dick i'm not saying i'm not trying to be rude but it is irrational like it doesn't really make any sense because it doesn't really have any impact yeah on you um if you're somebody that like has a local restaurant and you're banking on the fact that the team wins and they come in with a good attitude that might be a little more understandable like oh man now the vibe's gonna suck suck. And, like, that's direct. Yeah.

So we can all be like, all right, well, you got to. Very good point. Yeah, yeah. It's like you got to, or anyone that's associated with the team, one of the strength coaches or any of those people, of course they're going to, like, their highs and lows are going to be somewhat dictated by what's going on within the business, basically, is what it is whether it's

college or pro it ends up being a business the only time and we get caught up with that in the olympics too you know and uh the amount of money i mean this is this is insane and the united states is totally guilty of this too but in russia like there was years and years and years where people could barely get any bread but meanwhile they would be like so pumped at their dominance in olympic lifting in in the olympics and you're like well that seems that's that's what you're that's what you're banking on representing russia worldwide is their capacity to do a clean and jerk and a snatch. And that's supposed to be some great selling point of this place or that we're good at basketball.

Like, like give me a fucking break. What does nothing do with anything? That's not a sign. That's not a sign that you have a great country. That's not a sign that you have, uh, you know,

equality. And like, I mean, I'm not saying that our country is better than any great country. That's not a sign that you have equality. I'm not saying that our country is better than any other country. The Russian one is just an example because that's just an easy one to point out. Or their hockey team being so dominant for so many years. I would say the United States

and everybody else is guilty too. Everyone else is guilty of it. Why would we put millions of dollars into these things? It's crazy. I mean, it's a whole nother podcast probably, but we get a little nutty and a little fanatical about our sports. I dig them. I like them.

When the Niners were playing the other day, I was just talking to one of our family friends, and I was like, yeah, you know, I love football. Like, I really, I've loved it since I was a kid. I don't get too crazy, but when that game started coming out of the line, I started getting way into it, and I started telling people in the room,

I'm like, all right, well, if this happens, then they're going to do this, because I used to coach it, and I was getting all fired up, but I'm also like, yeah, I'm not going to be super mad if they lose and like slam the door and be all pissed off. I'm a pretty hardcore,

what do they call it? Armchair coach. Like, or like when the, like the close, close call comes. Have fun with it. Dude,

I am like talking shit to the refs. Like, come on, there's no way that's a fumble. He did not catch the ball. He had one foot down and it was already out. Like, you know, just talking shit, but it's so much fun for me's like, come on, there's no way that's a fumble. He did not catch the ball. He had one foot down and it was already out. Like, you know, just talking shit. But it's so much fun for me to like to get into the game.

But then once that game is over, it's like just like a hardcore workout here at the gym. Nobody gives a fuck outside of that. Like, let's just keep living. I did want to ask just really quick as a last thing about reinterpretation, just in case people who are finding the podcast now, because you have talked a lot about it in the past. If you can just kind of give us a rundown on interpretation and how people can utilize that every day. I just think, you know, one of my go-to things is how does this help? How does this hurt?

how does this help? How does this hurt? So whenever I get news of anything, I start to think, yeah, how is me reacting negatively or thinking of all the things that are outside of my control, how is that going to be helpful? I was just helping a friend more recently. He has a lot of anxiety. And part of the reason why he has anxiety traces back to the time he was a kid. I think his mom died when he was young. His dad kind of left him to figure his own shit out. And so he has a lot of anxiety because he's trying to, like, control as many factors as he possibly can so he can feel safe because he didn't have parental guidance guidance really right and um so i think like being trying to be aware of like where like where's this shit coming from you know trying to figure out where's this shit coming from like your mom didn't hug you enough your dad didn't hug you enough um that might be true and that might hurt but are you

gonna have that hurt you and everybody else around you forever? Like, how long are you going to fucking live this? How long are you going to live this out for? Your other employees that you work with, they got to deal with that every day. They got to deal with the fact that your mom and dad didn't instill confidence in you. They didn't teach you manners or like. Your significant other can't bring up that one thing because that set you off yeah yeah because you're yeah because you're just yeah yeah you get you get

so uh you get so mad or pissed off at you know certain things so it's like and the relationships that you currently have you know how are those tied to the relationship you had, you know, with your parents and things like that? So I think just awareness is critical. How does it help? How does it hurt? Trying to figure out skill set, some sort of skill set to either deal with the thing directly. If you can't figure out a skill set to deal with something direct because you don't know much about it, put it on the back burner a little bit. But in the meantime,

still be pursuing and looking for answers. Knock, you know, knock, ask. It's like one of the main things in the Bible, like just ask, you ask. You want something, just ask for it. And I actually think that that is like the way of the world, whether you believe in God or the Bible or don't believe in any of that. I think if we're being honest, you still just go around asking for shit and you'll get stuff. Hey, how do I make this edit on my phone with this picture?

Someone, ask 10 people. Someone's going to show you. Ask somebody, you know, how to start a podcast. Someone's going to know. Ask Google. Ask YouTube. Ask your friend. Ask whoever.

So be like seeking it out. But I really do think that it's really important that in your interpretation of things, you have to understand that it all traces back to your experiences, the way that you've been treated and the way that you've treated other people. And that is why you're currently interpreting things in a particular way. And what you want to do is you want to work your way towards having interpretations of things that play into your favor that are advantageous for you. I don't mean like you're trying to bend the truth or you're trying to like lie

to yourself to shape things in this warped way of belief or anything. What I mean by that is that when you hear news, that's when you get news, period, like let's just call it that rather than say that it's bad news or good news, you get to determine what you're going to do with that information. The only thing I think that's appropriate to do with information is to try to have like a game plan, is to put knowledge towards it. Okay, this information came in. Probably the worst thing I can do is, oh, let me wait on that for a second.

Let my emotions build up massively and let me overreact to it. That's going to be, that's going to be a great way to handle it. Probably the best way to handle it is to have the information coming in. And if you feel emotion, they wait a second. I should wait on the emotion. Let me,

let me sift through my brain. Do I have any knowledge that can be helpful with this? Nope. Fuck. I don't. But I do know somebody that does. Like you'll know somebody. You can go through your brain and you can start to comb through it. You'll know somebody or something or someone that will be able to assist or help you with whatever the thing is that you're working on.

But reinterpretation has helped me with everything. I don't have bad days. I barely have bad moments because I just, I learned to reinterpret them, as I mentioned earlier, with failure. I don't even really feel like I failed at anything. I just feel like if there is a failure somewhere, I didn't produce the correct knowledge at the right time in that particular moment.

And it could have been because I got moved off of my balance or my equanimity a little bit. But then I try to learn from it and say, hey, look, this happened last time. You got emotional last time and you texted people right away and you were pissed at them or at least sounded pissed. That's not good. Figure out something new to do. So that, that's all the stuff that's helped me a lot with reinterpretation. Amazing.

Anything else for Saturday school? That's it class. Thank you guys so much. Hey, next week, bring your protractors. Yeah. Like they're coming back strong.

Protractors and your trapper keeper oh trapper keepers yeah i can never afford those ones i just have the cheap ass dollar tree or 99 cent store ones 98 cent store dollar 25 biden did that uh anyways yeah so thank you everybody for joining us on today's episode of mark bell saturday school um i think uh i looked at the attendance and some people dropped off. So we are open for enrollment. Oh, wow. Yeah. We have a couple of spots left. Three spots. Yeah. In our class. So $350. If you guys know anybody, send this to them so that way they can register right away because things will fill up quick. And I guess we'll start the waiting list again as well.

So if you did receive this, make sure you guys subscribe to this YouTube channel so that way you guys don't miss another Saturday School or any of our other podcasts, whether they be live or premieres. Just some phenomenal guests coming up very soon here. So please make sure you guys subscribe. If you're not subscribed already, ring that bell notification and comment anything down below, anything that you guys found helpful, or maybe if you guys have some more questions that we might address in a future episode of Saturday School. And follow the podcast at MarkBell's Power Project on Instagram at MBPowerProject on TikTok and Twitter. My Instagram and Twitter is at IamAndrewZ. Make sure you guys follow our other co-host Nsema Iyang at Nsema Iyang on Instagram at NsemaYinYang on TikTok and Twitter. And also pay attention to whatever else he has to say after we jump off air.

It's going to be an awesome sponsor ad. So make sure you guys don't miss that. Mark Bell, where can people find you? I think you just made up a new thing. You said Shinstagram. Shinstagram? Yeah. Shinstagram.

That's like when you bang into Instagram. Oh, right on the shin? Yeah, Shinstagram. Yeah, I always used to say like um like if i downloaded an app and like i never used it i'm like oh it's an accident like i didn't mean to actually get it i like it i like it i'm at mark smelly bell strength is never a weakness weakness never strength catch you guys later powerhouse family how's it going now we partnered with an amazing brand bubs naturals we actually have some of the products on the table. They're MCT oil powder.

They're collagen protein. And this f***er. Yeah. This f***er. They're apple cider vinegar gummies. Okay. One thing I want to let you guys know real quick is that the Bubz products, number one, they mix super well. So I've had different MCT oils, and I've talked to people who have used MCT oil and mentioned it to their copy and it doesn't mix well.

Well, their MCT oil is amazing on coffee in the morning just on its own, but their collagen protein and collagen is great for joint health, hair, skin, nails, all that stuff. That also mixes just so well into coffee and everything. It's that's the one of the crazy things. But secondly, these these freaking apple cider vinegar gummies i don't ever supplement apple cider vinegar but they put them in gummies which is great two per serving we have literally eaten one of these full things andrew and i have split this and mark mark has to be so careful like we give him two and we take it away because it tastes so good, but it's actually really good for you.

So Andrew, tell them how to get it. Yes, guys, seriously have just the recommended dosage. Just have two of those gummies. Don't have two full bottles. The way we do head over to bubs,

naturals.com and that checkout enter promo code power project to save 20% off your entire order. And what's really cool about Bubz Naturals is they actually donate 10% of all their profits to various charities, starting with the Glenn Doherty Memorial Foundation. Again, BubzNaturals.com, promo code POWERPROJECT to save 20% off. Links to them down in the description as well as the podcast show notes.