Matt and Shane's Secret Podcast - Ep 474 - Lemaire's Long Haul (feat. Lemaire Lee)

Episode Date: December 31, 2023

Support the D.A.W.G.Z. @ patreon.com/MSsecretpod Support Lemeezy Nate and Andy @ patreon.com/pitm Go See Matt Live @ mattmccusker.com/dates Go See Shane Live @ shanemgillis.com Get Merch @ mssecretpodcast.com/merch HAPPY NEW YEAR! LeMeeg has finally arrived in Texas after driving 30hrs straight. Mashallah. We missed our pal so much and we're all so happy he's finally here!! We hope everyone had a great Christmas and hope everyone has a great new year. Please enjoy. God Bless. Support the show & get Lucy Breakers for 20% off & free shipping at https://www.lucy.co promo code DRENCHED Support the show by going to https://www.hamiltondevices.com & using code DRENCHED15 for 15% off Go to https://auraframes.com/mssp and get up to $60 off today.

Are you playing a UGEO card game or is it more of like interactive card game? Okay nice on your phone. Yeah, nice So I don't have to buy packs How much money can you win from that UGEO card game? How much can you win you win like online poker you can win money. Oh no You get game points to buy card back better off. Yeah, is it like just help you meet like 12 year old? Is that the price I said the prize No, I would call them little fuckers. I thought game was fun. Do you remember that we were playing? I was pretty good. You were playing

Yeah, no, no the The cell phone game was like it was like you get phone destroyer That was good. That was good. Anyway, we're here live with the newest resident in my fucking house I don't think I've ever made a worst Your shame It is you're the go up there you have to go over there and be like you know what's called lamar lamage Lamage I'm gonna sit back with you. I'm gonna be like lamage. We gotta talk

My wife died. You're my son now. Lemige, I know you're his head. Lemige doesn't get sad. True. It's actually fucked up. No, I guess sad, dude. No, he had a psychotic break at Walmart,

so now he doesn't get sad. He had a piss of pants at Walmart and solved the sadness dilemma. That age old dilemma of being sad as a man. Yeah. What's this all for? What's the point? He broke the plane.

Just piss yourself at a fucking Walmart. Yeah, I don't piss on myself on the road because I tried to pee and drive. What, are you on the road for a long time? Yeah, we got to get into this. Yeah. Lamar got here last night after, how long, when did you leave? I left Philly at like 3 p.m. And you got here the next night at like 9 p.m.

They did it stop I didn't stop I went to a minicky or firestone in Arkansas to get my car like that, but I was out of that now. Oh, I had to get into this brave move Stop it now. I can tell Man, I couldn't get rid of those tanks. They're still in my car. What tanks? I had these quarter kegs when I was getting the weed juice in my office.

Yes. I think there's two of them, right? Yeah, and then we kicked two of those kegs of weed juice. And I was a yellow man, I traded him in, that in the tap, and we could probably get one hundred and thirty bucks. No one's taking it. No one's taking it. They're like, don't take that. I guess I haven't tried to return a keg or tap since I yeah 2004 I should deliver beer and I was like yeah you get like 75 bucks for the tap. Yeah No, I don't think it's a no one will take it although those kegs they probably can't be reused

Yeah, they're late in the TAC. You have fuck up a graduation party You can summon graduation party somewhere down here in Texas now. I'm sure they rinse them somehow. Yeah, it's a water. They wouldn't take them. You're like, you were trying to sell. Yeah, I tried to sell it to like free places in Philly.

They're like, no, and I went to three places in Arkansas. I kind of fuck with Arkansas, dude. Arkansas is nice. Yeah, well, this hand, they're like, no. The one guy was like, nobody would buy it from me. Three places that Arkansas kind of fuck with Arkansas dude They're like now the one guy was like nobody would buy it from me. Oh You'd like you'd like Arkansas you'd like the razorbacks you'd like a little fucking Love the razor that little blue yeah

Blue big silly Now they're the razorbacks. Yeah. You love the 28th at 3pm. Yeah. And you arrive at 29th at 8pm from Philly to Texas. Didn't stop to sleep. One headlight. 21 hour drive. There's one headlight. Yeah.

Half the way. Damn, you pedidled out. Pedidled. You pedidled. Damn. You know, if people got punched because of you, you know, how many people got fucking sock in the arm. You know what a ditto is?

You see a car on one head like a ditto and touch the top and whoever doesn't last, you get the sock in the arm. You don't know what a ditto? Yeah, I helped up with ditto. I was a ditto. You smoke right away when you woke up. You know what a ditto, dude? It's been so long since I smoke.

I didn't smoke and drive, I didn't smoke and drive because I had the headlight and that kind of sucked. I was ripping vape though. I had this Mike Tyson vape. It's almost out of like vape juice. You were packed on the Mike Tyson painkillers? Yeah, he has a vape one. That knockout king. Mike Tyson and the jaw. So you got high and drove 30 straight hours to get to Texas. Yeah, he arrives upon arrival. How'd you say a week? I took one 10 milligram out of roll. Okay. I was okay. That's nothing. Yeah, that's not that.

10 milligrams not getting you through a 30 hour drive. Yeah. I mean, I guess I'm just built there for you. No, you're not you You can say that you can't say it on build every You can't say I'm built there and then last night we go to the bar and somebody's like just do a red bull and vodka. He's like I had five Celsius's It's like oh, yeah, well that'll keep you up That's fucking I have the Jake Paul energy drinkers. It's the Paul brother Celsius is like a new red I think I might be cobertates drink is it?

It's just a red bull. I think it might be cobertate's drink. Is it? No, it's cobertate. Cobertate rules. I can't believe how wrong I was. He's back. Dude, they got the Celsius mandarin mango. If mandarin mango, what is it?

Mandarin marshmallow. Mandarin marshmallow. Yeah, it was nice. How much caffeine is in the Celsius? I don't know what it took. He's in like just vitamin B. Really? It's crazy? It's got to be a ton of caffeine. I don't know what it took me. Is it like just vitamin B? Really?

Am I crazy? It's got to be a ton of caffeine. They got it. There's 200 milligrams of caffeine per can. How many of that? That's not too crazy. Five? Five is crazy.

Was it Celsius? I just met one. Celsius heat has 350 milligrams of caffeine in it. It was probably Celsius heat. If I think about it, it was probably Celsius heat. Yeah, I imagine knowing your way around a gas station Never dry I gotta be out the South Avenue Arkansas. I got buckies dude. What? You definitely you know your way

I'll be honest. I know my way around I know every aisle I walk here I know my way around. I know every aisle, I walk in, I go, where's the, get it? I know every aisle. Are you up to date on like, Gatorade technology? I am.

Where are they at right now? Gatorade like electroly, not electroly, it's always, it's obviously got electrolytes. Gatorlight. Gatorlight, it's like, PDLite, Gatorade. Oh really? Yeah, that's the newest tech.

They also got Gatorade like a lot. Snacks chance, fifth jam, Gatorade. Fifth jam, fifth jam. Fifth jam, fifth jam. It's the mock five The closest shape So they're drives 30 straight hours nothing but adder on five cells Chipotle Chipotle 10 minutes in the drive He's like I'm in Maryland. I stopped for Chipotle like

Take five minutes to get to Maryland Phil and Elf You started the trip and we're like, oh, there's an exit. I got a fuel up. You fueled up a gigantic dump. It's just a huge dump that Arkansas paid for. We got all the way down. Arkansas did pay for it.

That might be cute. You tossed a matter on the matter all dumps nice too. What's the adder? What's the adder what's the adder? Oh, it's just a emphetamine dump You hold it for a while you're like I'll never shit You got full chip all it all coming out of the Scream it out Tax pairs and I can so happy that's all their tax money They're gonna be standing on it like a fucking I get a asteroid

So we don't know where this came to wake up a white woman professor to try to communicate with it The only expert in the field the only expert is a woman He only expert in the field. The only expert is a woman. Anyway. So you drove 30 straight hours. We'll get more to the journey. But what I want to talk about is how impressive, I mean, the performance you put on.

You get to showers, we go to a bar. The sky just drove 30 straight hours. He's ready to go out. That's crazy. He wants to paint the town red. That's what I'm saying. I was like, dude, are you sure? This is crazy. He wants to paint the town red. That's what I was saying. I was like, dude, are you sure?

This is crazy. He put on a fancy vest. He looked good. Thank you. Goes out. I'd say 20, 30 minutes in is where things started. Unraveling. The boy collapsed.

Yeah, of course. He thought he had it. No, at the bar, at the other, yeah. Yeah, it was like the drops dude. The lemon drops. Oh, you're taking a lot of drops. I can't make them do shots. Yeah, I do it was on the drops dude. The lemon drops. Oh, yeah, I can't make them do shots. Yeah, I do. If you're tired, just do a shot.

You did so many shots. And then no red bull invite them and then LaMare hit me with a classical mayor move, which is just a fucking horrendous opinion at the bar. At the bar. He his opinions. You can get me so angry. I don't know if anyone can make any angry. He's taking this was the take.

He saw the Adam Sandler drew Barry Moore movie blended. And he said it was better than happy Gilmore and Billy Madison. What's the movie blended about? I didn't I haven't seen it. It's about Adam Sandler's wife dies. Drew Barrymore gets a divorce. They's about Adam Sandler's wife dies. Drew Barrymore

gets a divorce. They both got three kids and then they meet. They have a really bad date at first and then they meet throughout like a Sephardis just like the life. And then like the bosses or Drew Barrymore's friend is dating Adam Sandler's boss so they didn't get a safari together because the boss breaks up with his girlfriend They're like we're gonna go do this weird thing in Africa And yeah, yeah, Sandman just wrote a movie about his wife dying and meeting another lady. It is beautiful Kind of a boss move Baby like the guys wife dies. He gets

That's the worst way ever So he's like it's a confused. So he just gets pussy with his lady She did it from some bad cancer. Just sick. He must have wrote that movie in like fucking two days. He's probably there once a minute. And then I accidentally run into the hot chick again. Then all these movies were about cancer for a movie or a four second.

Really? Like funny people was about cancer and like blended about cancer. Yeah. It starts to really interrupt your social life right around that age. Can't say get cancer. Yeah, hit 50 and it's like people start fucking grabbing it. But back to the main, the opinion.

So yeah, when it's better than fucking happy, you know, yeah, dude. Yeah, I had a good time. Why so? What's like, what really, what grabbed you? It just, it was just just it was a touching flick It was it was heartwarming. It was nice to watch love bloom and not be forced in a rom com, you know I'm with you that so he's talking to you talking about a whole new thing. What about happy Gilmore and Virginia Bennett

That was Mom was wishes that was forced as I was not forced at all the new bad boy on tour shoot him a guy I'm saying don't kick him off the tour Virginia vennet going hey this guy's a ratings dream I mean this is crazy that you oh so she was like she was using him for ratings now. Yeah, that's not real love This now then they're gonna date at a hockey ranking and says, if you make that shot, we have to kiss. If you miss it, she drills it. Dude, I don't remember you. It's about your all time back.

I'm back. So she drills it. I don't remember. And this is one of the most global movies of all time. I know. I'm telling you, I'm losing my mind. It's my problem. But I confused. I used to be confident.

I used to know what was going on. I was putting my kid down today. I for real is like my way to I'm always in a dark room and you have a kid. So like that's why the edibles have to stop because like you one day they kick in you're in a fucking pitch black room with your kid and she's just like. Oh God. It's the face you have to be brave dude. You can't be a pussy. But I was getting fucked up today about like my inner self my actual organism body I wasn't high at all, but I was just like dude. I just someone has to just fucking put me down, man I'm fucking I've lost the thread

I'm fully lost. Oh, yeah, dude. I get on all I do is look at social media. You have to I just look at only safe place I get on Twitter and see the most horrific things possible dude that fucking drone Yeah, it was brutal video. I don't want to see anything anymore dude I I saw a video yesterday this like I think it was Russian drone pilot just killing these two Ukrainian dudes not that stuff comes up for me and Then the next post was like a bar soul sports like look at hot those chickens What a terrible world.

Yeah, but then you just live outside of the phone world and like, dude, it's I'm dying to get back. As soon as I'm like, I have a spare second. I'm like, can't wait to see what's on the phone. It's going to be so sick. It's going to be so fucking sick, dude. And then you turn on you go, and you let me down again. Damn, everyone says I suck.

Maybe I should if I just keep looking, there's something good coming. Something cool is going to happen. Yeah, wait. Ooh, no, they've got a three star recruit. suck. Maybe I should if I just keep looking there's something good. Somebody's something cool is going to happen. I can't wait. Oh, no, they've got a three star recruit. Yeah, my day's turning around. True. Just waiting for a guy to be like, no, it's cool. Matt McCosmik. Oh, thank God. I'm so sick. Let me see how many falls. Yes. 36 followers. Fuck. Fuck. Fuck. So, Louise, you got there. You just started turning up the juice on the lemon drop I was like, fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck He was a minute away from puke in the Uber. I had it though. I had it though. I had sounded like it was in your mouth. Like, for real, it was like, he's like,

oh, almost longer as a screw. And I was like, don't, dude. Don't fucking puke at this, dude. Oh my God. You held it in. Yeah, I held it in. I had it. And then he horked where?

In the bathroom in there. I clook up. I took care of it. Yeah. God, David. You're never talking. We're gonna have a talk. Also, we're gonna talk about the duration of this living maybe because there's no way you're leaving. There's no way you're the way this ends is me going. You gotta get the fuck out. There's a good drowned in the pool. You might.

You might walk the plane. You might walk the plane straight into that pool. And you're gonna get casing the enemy. It's gonna be a classic who done it. This could be scandal lies manipulation. For the record, I would never kill the Marley. Of course I would. And I was right. Yeah, I know. I would never kill the manly course and I was right. Yeah, I know I would never kill you So if you do

You could though you've never been more able to kill the mayor Then the next couple however long Just there's not yeah, I just grab a knife right there. Oh, yeah, just wait me when he's in bed. Just dude He doesn't wake up by the way. Yeah, he's the heaviest sleeper I walked on you sleep in the one time You're fucking office he's just Solon logs unbelievably I'll be honest. I'm not a mayor. La mayor didn't wake up And I was like you know, I started working and I was finally like half an hour later came out and I'm like bro

I could have fucking killed yeah Yeah, when I heard I forgot he was living in your office. Yeah, and then we may I was like you can come stay down here And then I didn't really ask about a duration. Yeah the The other day I asked. And he was like, I don't know, probably like April. I was like, God, this is like six pocket months. It's so long. In a six month week. It's crazy. I'm like, you gotta wait for the house. That's their housing market. But then he's like, I got it. It's got to wait for the bubble.

It's a move. That's the move. I mean, it's got it. It's got to lay for the bubble. That's the move. I mean, you know, it's the move his parents. But then I didn't know he forgot he was just living in your office. And then I remembered that. And I was like, God, damn it. This guy's not going anywhere. He's not going to leave my house. I'm going to get another office.

I'm going to get another office. Yeah. Bring his hate now. Bring he was like, I was like, I'm going to get another office. I don't care. It's nice to have a little mayor there walk in Limerick's just fucking Limerick is dreaming What's in there just doing my stuff? The hardest sleep right dude. I was shocked How are you shocked? I'm that's the most obvious thing I've ever heard. Imagine what I studied your real one.

Shane, Shane, like, I'm watching you sleep and you're just gone. This is crazy. It is nice white noise though. Aw. It is nice white noise though. Snoring is funny again. Here is Snorewire fucking. Snoring is funny again. Snoring is so, dude, I was at my parents' this the last few days and Phil goes wild. Oh, I think it was nuts.

Snores. You can hear him from downstairs. You can hear a guy up there going, awww. They're hitting like 0% blood oxygen in their brains. They're hitting zero percent. I can be here. It feels apnea from the other room You're just like All of their dreams just them and Kevin Koster and yellow We have we gonna get this I don't know partner We how we gonna get this horse a partner

How we gonna get that horse up up on there a trailer It's on Fox nation We stayed we stayed in my parents house when we went back I think around Thanksgiving whatever was I figured what it was and My we're like sleeping like my dad watches TV at like 90 and it's just It's just war there's just warfare the whole time like dude go to bed Warfare mix with it dude occasionally gone The opening scene of saving private Ryan on fucking 100 And then wake up we go

I'm like, he's like three shows. Yeah. Wake up. Wake up. Furious. Me and everyone for the first four hours of the day. Yeah, the me. My dad gets bullied. He's like just around by like these girls.

He's in a girl house. Yeah, Matt, they're just so mean. I know. They're going to, they're going to, they're going to, they're going to, they're going to, they're going to get so mean. I know. It starts so early. There's going to get, they're like, hey, I do. They're going to they're gonna get so lead. I know it starts so early There's gonna get there like a idea. They're gonna get better and better They're gonna learn more about me. Yeah, right now. There's be like you're not my best friend. I'm like Give it fuck damn dude. You got to get with that. Give me with you're not my best friend. I'm gonna give it 10 seconds

You're not my best friends brutal, dude, although I Although I'll be able to be in there a little fucking, you know, international warfare just being like, well, that's actually kind of fucked up. Yeah, you can split them. Yeah, you can see I women. I can America out pretty soon. Yeah, yeah. You can fond of Koe.

You can be like, actually Koe is number one. I don't care about the votes, Koe, you're the new new I was hitting the kids with that all week who's like the boss. No, I was just hitting with any time I got alone about you know we're best friends. I was doing that. They love it. You're a Distabilizing a child. I just kept telling the kids I was the best friends. They take best friends very seriously I remember that yeah, my best friend was a serious issue dude. I didn't know three year olds were about best friend like dude my she had a friend in her old like Daycare, yeah, when we moved. I'm like, yo just delete her She was like, no, that's my best friend. I'm like dude. You have to get out of this

Never gonna see her again. She was just like what she was so sad. Isn't the best friends like the plot of all kids stuff It's like you just doing things with your best friend saving your best friend a huge plot of all kid stuff. It's like you've just doing things with your best friend, saving your best friend. A huge plot too, if you want to get a kid interested, you talk about a little baby who's a way who has to find their mom and they'll just like, you can just, they'll just sit there for an hour and be like, and then it wasn't their mom and they're like, oh my God.

And then we found it and they're like, every story's about like a, a, like a weird animal. They've lived it, dude. Any you know the fucking mall or the supermarket? Yeah, you're like, do you ever get lost? Yeah, I got lost Terrible. I take ten minutes Yeah, I grabbed the ladies jeans and the mall thinking it was my mom turned around just another lady, you know, it's like I'm gonna die That's that's your when you're a little kid. You're like and I was like, I'm gonna die. Yeah, that's your, when you're a little kid,

you're like, if my parents are here, I'm dying. It's programmed into you. There's like a sex drive, there's all this aggression drive, and then there's attachment. No one talks about attachment. Attachments like, if your parents are in around, and you're like convulsing in your head, you're dying.

As an animal, you're like, I'm dying now. I need my mommy. Yeah, dude, in nature, if you don't have your mommy in nature you die. Yeah. So think about that, Lamar. If you're a little baby and mommy's not around, you're gonna get munched.

Yeah, dude, for a fact, you are a little baby. Yeah. Yeah. It is good to have you. And I am happy you're living here. I'll take it easy. I will be on your ass every single day. I mean, Lamar, it's just in just a couple of months, you can open the doors and walk right into the pool. He's never going to leave. He's never leaving. He's never leaving. He's never leaving. He's in a slide open doors just following a pool. He's never leaving. He's like, yeah, I guess I'll find that department

pretty soon. He's in a pop-up or do you like an alligator? Do you really walk it out? No. He's in a get-up. He's a drag you in. I'm going to be like, uh, fuck, I forgive his name. What's the drug dealer from Columbia? Pablo Escobar? I'll be yesterday. I'll be like behold I have a hip-hop

I'm gonna have a house party and just be like we may just swim Swim and I'll say gaze upon him Get out of the pool part with you. So, Ma'er, you're new Sandler, you're old Sandler in terms of taste. I like a lot of new. Oh, yeah, I've got a new. You rode for Hueby Halloween. Hueby Halloween was big. You rode hard.

You rode into the storm for that. I did. And you were right. I've said it hard to shield a huge I said this is a classic it was Planet is even if it is good, which I'm not saying it's not it's not better than Gilmore Madison I don't know I have to see it now I have to see it. I don't know because they're fucking opinion their classics You like some wild you like vampire movies. Don't I don't tell anybody about my poetry

Don't you motherfucker, I just remember I was gonna say anything I will say I can get drawn into any plot I start off being like these vampire shows are so dumb and two seconds Like like wait these guys alive join the revolutionary war I'm lost pretty cool. I told about what we do in the shadows. No, but that's the best original bro Spent off of the vampire diaries Spent off of the vampire diaries Blended And I did dude I didn't it wasn't up to me to watch it. I was just yeah I'll catch you down if you're forced to watch a girl movie. It's not bad

You got I hate this turn. So I watched the Barbie movie this week dude that actually sounded sick Would you be kind of slaps? It was actually pretty good You were slated to me like that's pretty tight actually Ken was funny. It should yeah Ken was funny issue. I watched on the road I yeah You watch the what the Barbie movie on the road nice Yeah, oh, yeah, that was one of the that was one of the things during the 30 hours he hit said the kid does that dude Said the kid puts a movie on the nominate The kid does that dude said the kid puts a movie on the nominator

Do you does it too? That's Deeds does it. That's where I got it from Forget how gully Deeds is he is Deeds is gully is hell No gully dude Deeds hood. Oh, yeah, oh, yeah, I forgot he is from Inga Woods. Deez so Hood. I was with Deez all weekend, dude. Yeah. Yeah, we were cutting it. We were hitting a scramp, so it was me and Deez were crushing scramps. He was impressed at how much you could eat.

Oh, I could throw it out. Yeah, I could munch. Everyone judges me, dude. Every time I bring, I'm like, hey, let's go get stuff to eat. And I'm like, all right, we'll get, I ordered like the shrimp. I would have, then I ordered some ribs, obviously,

for later. So I had two entrees, an appetizer. Everyone's like, dude, you're a pig. It's like, bro. Yeah, dude. That's how you watch me do this. This is nothing. I feel like this, I eat when you have a bunch of brothers.

True. Because you're like, I gotta eat as much as I can right now. You have to speed eat. You also want to get, that's true. Manja, if we get a pizza, I get a slice hill, like look at me and then grab a slice. Oh, yeah. And you're like, I ain't up to a slice.

Yeah, you guys want like draft picks. You can scout me every slice you got. First pick. I get the first pick. 2012 dominoes. I mean, dude, you're scanning, like, you know, they never cut it perfectly. There's no place to be bigger.

Small size doesn't even count though. True. I'll take your small size It's like I didn't even have a slice so that's fine. Yeah true. That's that's a good point small slices like trading long skinny boy Yeah, it's kind of like I'm taking a break on yeah, there's always the big slice then older brother snagged the one with the bubble This big slice with the bubble almost brother snags out like dude like look, your finger touches, like bro, don't, I don't care, I'll eat that anyway. What brother are you, Matt?

Metal. Metal brother, I'm a third brother out of six. So I'm three, there's two brothers me, sister brother, sister. So I was from like the first wave of family, then there was a break, and then there's the new wave. The Neo McCutts. We make fun of Neo, it's really like, the Neo's didn't realize. The Neo's had it easy. The Neo McCuscus. We make fun of the Neo's. We're like, the Neo's didn't really.

The Neo's had it easy. The Neo's had it easy, bro. It was kind of bowl-should- Old fucking Billy had it really easy. Bro, it was crazy. He was talking about old Silver Smooth Billy. Truly, truly it was. Yeah, even I'll say Catholic.

Catholic was pro-Domacuscus, a little bit. And then I'm just trying to think of which kids got hit which kids did it Because the kids who did it get hit Neoma Cuskers Parents just got tired. I watch my parents just get tired. Yeah fucking whatever. Yeah for the last two to speak like all right Bro, whatever you want to do. Yeah, that makes sense. I could imagine like the things they tried to stop you guys from doing We're starting fires Sorry fires the sealant stuff.

Yeah, we're doing it. Guys are like fucked up. Pretty crimes, killing animals here. The Tom and Kev play sports. No, not really. Yeah, those are the worst kids. Yeah, they're literally the worst kids. They were like Sid from Toy Story.

Like non-sports kids that are out there still doing bad stuff. Yeah, dude. Those are dangerous kids. Yeah, dude, starting fires. They saw, there was a neighbor kid that we they Kevin met him in the woods and just told him they're devil worshipers I remember these kids I grew up around these exact kids. I mean those are some weird fucking dudes You'd meet him in the woods like we're worshiping the devil pussy. Yeah, we're listening to Pearl Jam. They start off

Oh, this is the cool yo, Ron. I would like to go back to Limeringer Breed. I'd like to know about you. What's your biggest feasts? I need to know about you guys feasts. Because I know there's legendary feasts. We just hit the K-pop the other day. What'd you guys do there?

No, I'm talking all time feasts. Like all time? You have to remember one when you guys just fucking put it down It's that K-pop time we put it down. We went in with a plan. They're like you know at K-pop They started on some bullshit when they let me it's k-pop. It's Korean barbecue. Oh They must Yeah, Jackie Chan, let me get him off I'm here tomorrow

Do we got it we did strategize You guys Would you hit him? Operation Would you hit him with it? Rea's like, all right, he's gonna come. Operation. Well, the operation. Barrosa. Just out of the bug lot. Planning. Master strategies.

Rea's like, I'm gonna go make some sauces. I'm gonna give me this type of soup. And I also like this, this and this. You guys are ordering for each other at the buffet. Yeah. Well, you got to order the food you need. You got to cook the hot pot. Yeah, the hot pot.

So what's the deal? Is it like all you can eat types that up? Yeah, but they put is it used to be you could like just hang out but now it's just two hours they rush you out yeah and they don't come at they don't come around you know how much you pay how much you pay thanks giving takes like 20 minutes. Yeah, it was like $100. Yeah, and it was all you need. 60 bucks. It was me, Jabri and B. And we got drinks too.

We're hanging. And they were like, they hard, they hard limit on two hours. It's hard. It gets you out of the way. It's a guy in like a fucking square on his chest. Come out. We didn't get, we didn't kick, we just knew we had to leave because they just stopped coming slow it up.

Yeah, just start looking at us. So we had a chow gets on some bullshit something. Yeah, it's like bro, I know I've been here enough. I know all the cuts you have. Yeah, chill with the sausages homes. Yeah, they know you're gonna feed sterley, they know you're gonna pick and they can fucking yeah, here's a chicken leg. Here's a big

Raps also just like bro. I'm waiting bring out the lamb bring out the prime cuts It's a big yes, they try and the die will say they get me every time on the fucking pounder kids bring up the dang pork cheese bread Where do we eat? That's take us that fucking what's it? What's that called? I was trying to think Buffalo fucking bro lamb chop was dude Unbelievable and I Lame chop was dude Unbelievable I'm gonna run by I corumbis will be meeting you still what's that we meeting? I don't want to jinx it true because I'll definitely not do it dude. I'm gonna I'm gonna commit it I need I need a car would I a January? Okay, I'm spinning out of control dude with the car meets only dude

You ready just me and milk? with the carbs. It's only dude. You ready? Just me and Mel. Yeah, I'm gonna have a heart attack. No, you're gonna drop like 30 pounds. You're gonna have a heart attack. I'm drinking five fucking dang energy drinks. I'm drinking only prime. Yeah, say it for 30 hours. You'll have a heart attack. Eat nothing. Really? Yeah, bro, eat nothing but really. Not stand up for 30 hours. It's really. Yeah, little man. I don't want to blow your mind, but what's your heart made out of meat? It needs more meat

Needs more fuck me I never Dude you think about it great. That's too. No, not no not dude. What eggs and meat? I love peanuts No peanuts, how many peanuts do you? You know your church like Snickers Mars You're eating peanuts not at a baseball game My dad crushes peanuts like that. That's nice. You guys are tin at the house And he's scooped somebody gets crushes peanuts like that. That's nice. You guys are tin at the house and he's scooped somebody gets crushes

He's a Virginia peanuts whole tub. I don't like bring you over like yo crushes with me After two scoops of peanuts, so you get a stomachache It's a fine line if I have a long ride. I'll get the heat peanuts to like little trainer peanuts from from where the gas like little trainer of peanuts from where? The gas station. Right, I was out here. Yeah. Did you head down here for the peanuts dude?

The pecans are nice out here. Yeah. Yeah. They have pretty good gas stations out here. Like, wow, it's like not doing nothing. Yeah. Really? Yeah.

Like, compared to a buckies or like the quick trip. And why was that? Stay mired in controversy, dude. He loves it. He loved the smoke dude. Dude, look, your neo-sandler. All buckies, dude, I came in and buckied drip. I had the buck drip.

I got buckies, dude. I don't know, buckies is. What is buckies? Buckies is good. It's just a giant fucking gas station. Oh, I've heard of this. It's a humongous. But there's 9,000 people in it at all times. Yeah, kind of stinks. It's like a giant fucking gas station. Oh, I've heard of this. It's a humongous. But there's 9,000 people in it at all times.

Yeah, kind of stinks. It's like packed in there. Yeah. It's kind of uncomfortable. Walmart gas station? Yeah. Yeah. That's why I like it.

You like to get in the mix? Yeah. It's like the world's fair for the biggest dumbest idiots. Yeah. You can fry hot dogs, my God. Honey, honey, take a look at this. Sorry, I'm reading about the whole pair right now. I'm reading the volume.

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it's basically like social media, but without seeing all those annoying updates from your fucking high school classmates That actually is sick. You can like the pictures on there. Well, you can I didn't know that It's got an interactive touch bar. Whoa I like that your mom goes nice. Nice. Well, she saw the picture ice It actually is sick. Yeah, it's sick. This holiday season listeners can save on the perfect gift by visiting auraframes.com slash MSSP. That's a you are a frames.com slash MSSP. Use promo code MSSP to get $30 off their best selling frames. Terms and conditions are applying to you. Obviously, dude. They apply to you. Read the fine print on that frame.

They are so sick, dude. Awesome, dude. How many do you have in your house? I'm like four of them sitting in my house. I really do. That's good, that's what you want. Oh yeah, dude, they're fully loaded. Just with taste.

What type of picks? Portraits of me. Just you. Just like an old fucking doctor. Do you ever in a hospital as photos? Yeah, a guy holding a chair. You should do that. Just take like engagement photos, but with it,

no one else. That would be tight. Like holding a pumpkin by yourself, all that shit. Just stock them on an aura. Just get a professional from having it. Have them everywhere. Yeah, that would be tight, dude. Let's see, I'm gonna take fake pregnant photos, too.

Yeah, I'm a big pregnant belly. And I'm like, yes It's big It's a big thing. It's not just for purpose anymore. What pregnant pictures. Yeah, it's not just I saw lady breastfeeding at the airport did you yeah, I said that would go nicely in my aura frame If I see I went I don't like this Did you take your legal one second of icon? You take a legal one second look. I'm gonna get you out of that to look obviously. I think legally you can take a look at it

for like a second and a half. You could have went, stopped, and waited, and then retouched. Wait, did I see a tip? Until you see an apple, yeah. And obviously at that point you're done, you're happy, satisfied. Let's go back to the show. Yes

Yes, wait before we go back to the show guard dog has a shoulder promote If you guys would like could you please come to Tampa in St. Peter in front of the camera Me and Lamar will be at the Sunshine Comedy Festival on January Me and Lamar will be at the Sunshine Comedy Festival on January 12th and If you use the if you use our names when you check out it gives you discount and then Cap City Comedy Club on January 24th Wednesday I'm very excited for that if you can come to that I first time I got lying down in Texas way my first time Headline down Texas way and then first time head line down Texas way.

And then the new one is Helium Philly on April 10th. Whoa. I'm very excited back to the motherland. Back to my home, my old stomping grounds. So I'm excited. If you'd like to join me, I'd appreciate it. If you can, I'd really appreciate it. Thank you. Hell yeah.

I'm also San Diego coming up January 11th. Please go to San Diego and call me club. Namaculsphere.com slash dates. I have a bunch of other shows comingth. Please go to San Diego and comedy club. Mammaculsar.com slash dates. I have a bunch of other shows coming up. Please go to them all. Please Shane and Gillis.com. Don't buy tickets from scalpers. Yes.

Goodbye. Thank you. I can't wait to go to Walmart. I got to go to one of these Walmart's. Yeah, probably pretty chill. I know. I just want to see it. Dude, there's a target.

This is this is very highly domesticated talk, but there's a target. And my aunt and uncle lived down here, and they were like, yo, there's target there. It's like, it's kind of fucked up. I'll fuck you up. Dude, nah, I was like, dude, there's being fucking pussy about it, it'll be fine.

And they're like, it's just the homo good sections fucked up. Because I'm walking through the target, I'm like, it's fine. You go, and for some reason, specifically, it's target when you go to the home conception, everything's been taken down the throne before. It makes no sense.

Everything else is fine. And the home good section, everything's taken down. And just, there's like 40 towels just stacked on each other and you're like, dude, I was like cracking up, I was like, who the fuck did this? It's been more like broken home goods. True.

I was with Brittany in Target and she was like, she had this mom. She made the longest 10 month of my life. You're gonna leave with me, where I leave this house. True. You can be a rancher and you make a nasty rancher. I don't know what this talk is about, the mayor being a good roommate. I'm a good roommate.

I'm a good roommate. You get the office was clean. I'll say that. He's, the office was squeaky. I walked in there and I was like, all right, bro, not bad. I'm a clean guy, dude. I just smoke weed. You can't smell bad, dude. Huh? You can't smell bad. Did you?

I haven't. I haven't. I haven't rounded you out. I have not rounded you out. I'm not going to matter you out. You don't want to. No, it was I was trying. I was trying out the it. Uh, uh, uh, uh, uh, what is it? You did a luminum free dude. It makes everyone smell. You did a luminum free deodorant while we were in Louisville.

It makes everyone smell like an alien. It was crazy. Nuts. Dude, you're in a fucking Hawaiian shirt. So there's pure air for coming out of these bodies It I've never smelled be a like that's about life dude that non-aluminum deodorant makes you smell You as well as not wear it most inopportune time to Jack Harlow came with his bros When the smallest it was like an old theater so the green room was very small There's like 15 people in this green room and it's stonk like fucking shit.

And the whole time in my head, I was like, God damn, Carlos squad is. He's the room that has beowed. It's a wild fucking squad. Which is a kind of alpha move though. I told you I really want somebody and it's your whole squad that has like a nice be out. Some of those boys are gully.

I was like, I might smell from these guys. And then we go to, we went to Jack's apartment and we were there and I was like, I might smell from these guys. And then we went to Jack's apartment and we were there and I was like, dude, it's Lamar, Lamar falling. Stinks, like, this is fucking a figure out. I mean, it's, yeah, but if you got in his orbit, so once you got to a bigger room, it was like, oh, the smell's coming from over there,

like across the room. Yeah, how soon after did you confront him for this? As soon as I smelled it with him, I was like, yo, I was being a friend. Yeah. I wasn't like, yo, you fucking stink. It was like, bro, you gotta, yeah. It's like, you gotta ask Jack Harlow

if he has any deodorant. He did. So, I'm gonna wear Jack Harlow's deodorant. He did. He did Several more Jack or less the other Really nice gesture I would have never done that it was awesome. What a beast. Yeah, really truly a lot of the other words It's truly with the guy you just met that stinks break the bread and breaking bread. He that went straight into the trash Oh, yeah, no problem So nice though. It was really awful.

Show me his Pokemon cards. What was he working with? Old Spice? Yeah, no, I don't know. It was like the deodorant that you twist. You know, like it comes through, but it's like pierced like a little bit. Gel? Not gel.

It was like the white kind. Okay. It wasn't gel, but it was yeah, okay, I don't know Might have been helped it helped a lot. You stopped smelling a little Once this thing gets going. Yeah, it takes a bath really get that stank off. Yeah, I mean I understand because like you usually don't smell now you can go on runs where you smell but It was just a lack it was a lapse in judgment with the aluminum yeah I made to me it takes 20 like that week Nate

told me it takes 20 days for your body stinks what is what it smells all the Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother.

Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother.

Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. Hey brother. I tried this before and it made me smell like you know when someone sprays fucking like lilac shit after you take a dump You smell like that. There's like this weird nice smell. Yeah, are you sniffing yourself? I caught him smelling himself He's all natural. I smell you lament or a guard dog doesn't smell fresh. Yeah, the breath gets bad But the pitch is fresh the breath can go wrong. She's I

Would I would hope we would all we would all tell each other. True, you have to. You have to. It is a hard thing to be the guy who your breath's fucking rough. Tell us when their breath is actually the nicest thing you can do for somebody. Yeah, because otherwise it's just riding all night. I can tell you, I just think about it all the time. And I probably have the most fucked up breath.

You haven't had it in a while. You used to. Did I? Occasionally you would get a little, when't had it in a while. You used to. Did I? Occasionally you would get a little, when we lived together, because that's how that works. True, yeah, true. You wake up one day, you're like,

I'm not brushing my teeth. I don't brush my teeth. I don't, I forget. My parents aren't even hearing it. I'm not brushing my teeth. I forget every morning. And if you don't brush your teeth in the morning and then smoke weed,

you might have the worst breath. You get the worst breath imaginable. Hey, Sigs. Sigs are rough. You get the white things in your throat? Do you get the white breath imaginable. Hey, Sigs. Sigs are rough. You get the white things in your throat? Do you get the white things in your throat? I don't know. Pause.

I don't know. No, there's like these, if you smoke a lot, you get like, you can't talk. Don't back. We're not doing that. We're not doing that. Tom, where are you at? You're breath smells so fucking bad.

You're breath smells. I never knew this the way. No, I've never smelled your breath. But dude, you can get these things. It's calcified. It's like milk. It's like for smoking. It gets stuck in there.

And you just like get it out and just you smell it right away. Obviously, it's like, dude, the worst. Yeah, I have had those things. I don't think I have. I'll smell it. I'll smell the floss. They're called tonsilists. They smell like floss.

But if you can conjure up a nugget of like floss, scum. Yeah. And then like just harden into a little rock of like floss, scum, yeah, and then like just hard into a little rock. And you get it, you feel in the back and you start fucking with it eventually pops out and you're like, oh my god, they're called tonsilists. They're fucking nasty. They're stums, right? Yeah, yeah. What? Yeah, you could have them just chilling behind your tonsils too and not even know it. You just be breathless. And your breath is fucking, you'd be crushing everybody crushing everybody who you got on the bad breathless Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you're not here. I got I might be me right now. I didn't brush my head coffee right now

Might be me right now. I didn't brush out in the name coffee right now, so Yeah, I've got I've got crushed by a couple people where I'm like, I mean, it's a third time in the row. Yeah Should say something if I'm not close to them. I'm not gonna say anything. Yeah, if it's like Lamar's BO needed somebody needed to tell Yeah, you need a friend. I've hit Nate with it. Yeah Nate Nate. We were at an Atlantic city after that show. Yeah It was insane staying Staying in. Yeah, it was like, bro, you got it. And he was like, all right, good luck. When we back to the hotel room, she Howard came back down like 20 minutes later,

it was like, perfect. It was nice to do. Yeah. In my, in my fatist, I hit some fucking insane smells. You were sorry, Frustre. Fatis depressed. Yeah.

You can hit a, you can hit a fucking insane like, like the, because you're, the bottom of your shirt gets like wet from sweat from your gut. Oh, yeah. It's fucking disgusting. And then it just fucking, and then you just,

I would just be walking around gym shorts and like a fucking five day in a row t-shirt. Yeah, in the bottom of my sight. And people would be like, oh my god, like go. Get it out. Like, I don't even care. I'm so sad. The undercut part gets,inkly like younger to us,

when it gets too wet. Yeah, it's embarrassing. Do you like bathtub wrinkles? Yeah, on your clothing, from your fat stomach. But just like that one part. It's one of those things, it hurts. Just sign on epidemic. It is, nobody talks about it.

Wrinkle, what you're just a shirt get like caught in there? Yeah, bottom of your shirt, yeah. It happens when you just chill and just say it. There's a wrinkle. What you just your shirt get like caught in there? Yeah, bottom of your shirt. Yeah. It happens when you just chill and just say that. That makes sense. But if you're a big dog, you're sitting for like five straight hours. Yeah. And then you get up from the shift and you go, fuck, we're off the shower.

I still have to go to Boston market. My dad. I pick my dad up from the bar and take him to Taco Bell. Stank you. And I sting you. You from the bar and take him to Taco Bell. Stink, you get the car, he's like, God damn. It's a matter with you. Putting the shift on the computer. Talking about the defense of though, someone's like, you stink. You're like, you're pussy.

You're like, oh, you a girl, you want me to smell good for you dude? Yeah, that's nice. That is quality. That is quality. Come back. I used to give my older brother would not wear the other my dude you fucking stink and then I was not wearing it Billy's like bro, you smell like shit. I was like fuck you dude Yeah, it depends how the message is delivered if somebody's like you stink like shit

Yeah, then it's like fuck you Well, what do you want to smoke? I do fuck that. I'm fucking too tough. Now, when you're, if you're in a gathering and somebody pulls you side. Yes, brother. You gotta get some gum. Yeah, true. You go.

That's awful. Bernie Hinsley has, did you brush his own bare face? Did you brush your teeth? I'm always like, no, why? Your teeth, you need a brush, I'm like, fine. Yes, bro. I just do a nighttime brush. And I got the spinny brush too.

So it's like, dude, you do that more than breast. More than breast is the same. Even after a nighttime. Yeah, but dude, since I was little, the worst thing is like when you have toothpaste, mouth, then you eat something and you take toss and taste like it should. No, I agree.

So I just, yeah, wait till I have to breakfast. And then after breakfast, my mouth's clean. It tastes good. Yeah, I drank coffee. Well, now my mouth tastes good. So I don't have that. It happens to me every day. My mouth has eggs and coffee in it.

Dude, I kind of like toothpaste. Orange juice after two. You're sick out. You're sick. These are the type of fucking bullshit. You're sick. You're fucking. Why do you say this?

You're sick. It's true. I kind of like the mixture. You're sick. You're sick. You might be dealt different and everybody might actually go different. It's just fucking authors He is he literally is neurologically different Yeah, the performance yesterday's performance was

Astounding did what you did was crazy. Yeah, yeah, it is impressive 30 straight to a bar And how many lemon drops? He was crushing these. I don't know. I mean, after that shift. So many. I'm surprised you didn't hop right out of there and have sex with a man.

Do you have any forts here? How you gonna do this, like a solid trucker run? It does five bucks, so it's hot. And you hollered at that dog. You yell at a fucking dog. We want to bar that like you can people bring their dogs into it's like you know yeah and well now I know it's like you can't drink because the dog is being you're being friendly but I was

like did the dog doesn't understand you're joking it literally just see someone screaming at it yeah he was a good looking dog. The bogey shout out. But how the dog like it. We became friends after that. Yeah, we're hanging out. Rob this mohawk speaking of dogs that have terrible news. RIP Zeus. What? Yeah, German Shepherd. He had stomach cancer.

He died. Those white shepherds bro long for this. He's not long for this earth, but he he fucked up. He's just freed. They he was asked was bleeding. So the game's medicine. Then he had a fucking seizure in front of all the kids. Oh Is that a dog see me? It's so yeah, zoomies with phone It's fucking it's harsh A dog seizure is so sad. Oh, what did they put him on?

I don't know. They put him down. Oh, and then they took him in the vet and they're like, yeah, he has stomach cancer. Yeah, the Michael Jackson. Yeah. He said, fatten all that bull. Fatten all that bull.

He's like, I gave him pepperoni, though, on Christmas Eve the night before his death. Beautiful. He said, brother, I was giving it, Riggins was over there. I said, Riggins, here's some pepperoni. I saw Zeus. Zeus, you could tell Zeus wasn't feeling well. Yeah. He's just sitting, but he still was looking at that pet. I said, Iins, here's some pepperoni. I saw Zeus. Zeus, you could tell Zeus wasn't feeling well.

Yeah. He's just sitting, but he still was looking at that pap. I said, I got you, brother. I mean, dude, he was tight. And pepperoni, and he was so sick, he was like, and he didn't breed, right? No. He's the last of his con.

He's the last of the workshop. So there's a genetic struggle through nature that ended with him just going, like, like, pepperoni. He's under a table. That is whole bloodlines. And then his owner being like, how much is that bill? Blanked out of his ass.

You got put him down. I'm not paying for fucking dog surgery. He's right, by the way. He is right, but it's, but the best was, so my sister facetimes me crying, obviously. Yeah. And I was like, the zoo was the guy. He was the man I love, Zeus.

And then I was like, how the kid's doing in Anthony? He was in the back and he's just like, we're going to the pool. I was like, all right, the kids don't give a fuck. They did knock him a fuck about that dog. Dude, I've never seen kids not care. We're going to the pool. We're going to the indoor pool today.

All right, he's all right. He might have just been asking his paid. Probably. The indoor water place just should be sitting under the fucking like mushroom thing. Just like, much, much more than. It's like, damn, I lost my fucking best friend. Oh, no, I mean, if it was Riggins, the family would have gone down. Yeah.

Zeus was the one that everyone was kind of like bro My brother had a white shepherd. They were counting down the days on it. I think I think yeah, that's and they're like weird They're fucked up. They're weird dogs. Yeah, they're fucked up. They're fucked up dogs. They're truly a Yeah, white shepherds are weird. Yeah white shepherds have like genetic abnormalities And they're just like they're prone to like diseases. They're like real fucking sketchy, too. Yeah, they're cool looking dogs Yeah, they take a wolf. Yeah, they're cool looking dogs. Yeah, look like a wolf. Yeah, fucked up somebody Picked out on the genetics of German chepherds and they're like, oh shit. Those boys love that true. The Germans are like make him fight Finally, it's a perfect dog

Zeus did cross your bird once in front of everybody. Did he really? Yeah, it was a nice move We're on a family vacation. We're on the pool and a bird just swooped too everybody. Did he really? Yeah, it was a nice move. We're on a family vacation We're on the pool and a bird just swooped too low. It was flying mid air This jumped in the air in Munchet K Austin suit Whole fan of all just women like Yeah, that's fucking great. Yeah, this was a good guy. Yeah It is tight. I was thinking about my dogs and distinctive programming recently

It's just like bro, it's so hard. Just like, we were passing a squirrel and I'm like, they have to pull the leashes hard as possible. Yeah, you got to kill that one. It's like a theory. So when I'm walking in my arm jerks, I'm just like, I have to like calm myself down.

I don't know if there's anything that makes me angry or quicker than a fucking dumbass dog. Oh my god. The worst thing that like hurts your elbow is like, you're on the wrong way. Oh! Dude, I'm, I started blaming like upper back problems on like my fucking dogs Yeah, fucking my backup stop me staring at my phone all the time and scrushed over like to great shame

We should get it dog, dude. I get pissed. The wife should get a dog for here What do you say we should get a dog? Yeah, true? Dude a little B show free say Yeah, true. Dude, a little B-Shrill Free Say. Ooh. Oh, that's happy you're here to see the dogs. I'm not bringing a dog in the ear like. He'd be best friends.

He's like, dominant adopting a child. It's bad, dude. I know what you do, dude. He's talking about the abandonment. He abandoned a dog, he squeezed a frog. He's done all types of wild shit animals. Frogs are basically, fuck. Squeezable.

Shrink balls. They're stress balls for kids, dude. You should've just fucking popped them. Frogs are so killable in your little. What kind of dog do you want? Be sure on Free Say. It's a little funny. I'm not sure I know what that looks like.

It's a dog that's a little dog. It's a dog that dances. We can't get a gay dog. We gotta get a dancing dog. It's already gay. We're living together I'm in the pool house Get the fuck out of J. Simpson you out there You can get them big too we can't dude you can get them big too. We can't do it. You can get a big

B show for you say dude although Harlow did have a good gay little dog. Yeah, that's a good gay dog. What was it? It's just a little tiny little tiny guy. That's so cute, dude. Yeah. I usually don't like those guys. I would be nice to go one big one tiny. Have like the big boy and his little buddy. Get the little guy first so so that the little big guy respects the little guy spike it. We could get a bulldog But then you we can't I'm never here I Know you're gonna be here always Yeah, true This is your house now

I'm gonna get it together What you gonna do I don't know deck it out get I'm gonna get it together What you gonna do? I don't know deck it out. I'm gonna get it together He wouldn't shame with my wrist. Oh, I got I got something I think you'll like that you may be able to be framable It's a all right There's this painting on sponge. It's called bold andash and Bold. I got a painting of Brash and Bold from SpongeBob. You want to frame a SpongeBob? It's already framed. This house is already in black ice house.

We can't frame a SpongeBob. It's already in black. It's possible. I have five t-shirts hangingshirts hanging. Totally empty house. Lamar, would you, I have a hot take for you. I'm curious if you'll take this one. I would say at this point in history, Asians are flyer than black people.

Wait, is that any good? Asians, I think, have be quietly become flyer than black people at this point in history. It looked fashion wise. The drips, I'm talking about the drip, the drip, the ticktocks. The ticktocks, the whips. Dude, that fucking side running thing,

that might have put them on top. The side running thing might be cooler than the cripple. What's your side running thing? It's like, yeah, Sean, man. That was actually a pretty good representation, honestly. It's great. It's been watching you guys for a long time though I know they have there. It's a hundred years later.

Yeah, all the CC people No, I'm waiting day to do yeah, dude. I'm telling you I walk by I walk by like Asian ladies now And they're just like the drips like incredible. Oh, man. What the fuck happened? I'm a dumb fuck dude. I think yeah Tell me it's been a silent queue well yeah, silent I think they came for it pretty loudly. They're like we're gonna make all the stuff cheap and then we're true

That's a good point and think about the economic act. I can't just type in Asian running pro Asian running pro That's my not be it you got let me check But yeah, it's like back damn. That's so tight. Yeah I used to use like a very offensive white accent all the time on videos. Can someone explain how he's doing this? I don't know. I am excited for YouTube voice to take over local news voice. That voice is going to be when we get older, our local news is going to be like, coming up at seven, what's going on with the local water park?

I'm stuck on water parks, but you know what I mean? Like and subscribe to channel five news. Did you ever get into the, what is it called the trans-Atlantic accent? Yeah. Where it's people from New York when I talk vaguely British. Yeah.

Like, oh wow, see? Like, Frazier? Yeah. No, like, uh, like, almost like a, it's almost peaky blinder talk. It's like, it's that accent of like affluent Yeah, like cheers cheers mint. You know like Dude we're in the fucking Northeast. I was thinking the transatlantic. I thought it was more like Yes, I will do that. I know I think I think the transatlantic is like in Quarro British Lexicon

But you sneak it in in a way where you're not like Okay, it's crushing like a Lexicon, but you sneak it in in a way where you're not like Cuz crushing like it's just rock it all the other the extra bartenders. They're the only yes, it's a transatlantic accent cheers Chip but I it could be wrong. Let me say I'll do a cheers. Yeah, trouble fries. All right I love the trouble. Cheers See lady transatlantic accent. Oh Here we go. This is a client. I could be wrong. You might be right about this But there's guys that they're teaching how to do it now

So you can like learn how to do it. Why who? What? When yeah, why are they bringing it back? It's like a cool thing you can do now. You can start doing, I guess you're right. That is the old time he acts at. I thought it was people trying to learn how to speak like subtly British. No, it was like American, New England, like.

That's crazy. We're rich. They went, huh? Like go Connor's death. Yeah. Christopher, you can't take the yacht out today. So I was wrong. I was wrong. Like go Connor's death Christopher You can't take the yacht out today So I was wrong. I was wrong. Speaking of the wrist man. He just texted me about kiss man staying down here. When is he coming?

Oh, yeah I got stopped drinking and saying you guys could say here It's gonna be probably it's gonna be bad You have been a disco ball for the zool and it's gonna be nuts. That's gonna be probably the end of the game. It's gonna be bad. You're gonna be in a disco ball from the zoo and do it. But it's gonna be nuts. It's gonna be insane. I got in a nice, a comment, a comment can get me more fired up than you. He's the one that gets me.

He'll lay wheel bad on me. Cause I'll just hit him with, like, I hit him. He'll just cast a trend too. He'll just so good at it. He'll just stay. So I was just, I was woke up one morning, I was like, I haven't talked to Chris in a while. I'll try to fight him.

Yeah, true. So I was just like, dude, they took Trump off the ballot and Colorado and Virginia, don't you think that's a little fucked up? You think that's fucking crazy a little to arrest your political opponent and then take him off ballots? Yeah.

And he's like, yeah, I mean, they're both so fucked up now. It's like, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,'s crazy. I'm just done with it. It's like, no, admit that this is fucked up. Just that one. He's like, yeah, but he's fucked up so many times. Sounds like you're getting liberal. He liberal is the fuck out of him. Yeah. Yeah, true. That is nuts. I was following that. I was like, there's gotta be, it can't be that. It's gotta be like somewhat and it's like, they showed up and just took them off. Yeah. They're like, but it didn't work. It didn't work at all. No, I think they did. But I think they, I think I think the Supreme Court

is gonna go now. Okay. The fuck. I guess another state was like, no, we're not. Colorado and I think it was Virginia. Really? Yeah. Trying to take the Trump dollar off the bat down Virginia way.

Virginia way? There's a liberal's control Virginia way. True. Yeah, the fucking the man and the men in North Richmond. Yeah. They're trying to take off our fucking beloved Trump off the fucking ballot. That's fucking great. The next one. The next project. That's a good move because the people vote in form are never gonna spell it right. True.

You misspell it. Fuck out of it. How do you? I know I'm such a live I'm such a fucking This is right down Although to be fair it is everywhere is the flags fly high down there so you can just fucking grab it anywhere Yeah, how do you fuckers with you? Bams you're not right there Drup what were people calling them drum for a while drum that was as liberal slam dude He's gonna win isn't that how it is isn't like you definitely gonna win. I was like you've here Yeah, so I thought last time though. He's definitely gonna win any loss. Well sounds like wrestling might've been some top full

We didn't know they're gonna fucking hit the rip-cord on the race war true race war pandemic They pulled out. I'll tell you their fire it back up. There's a fucking There's new movies now dude. They're trying to fire back up and the movies are Free movies a while magic or Negro movie. Yeah, I can't even say that I can't even say the movie that's like that magic movie that works so well on Fire me up, dude. I saw that preview and I was like Shellow bombers is watching you like we got him got his ass We got him. He's gonna be mad for the next five hours.

He's gonna say something. He's gonna say something really racist. It's a little narrower, Nate. No, dude, that movie. You ever been on Twitter? The premise of it's crazy, dude. Yeah. It's like pretty wildly outdated terms of like using

throws. Eight years ago. Yeah. Yeah, it is an eight year old movie. It should have throws. For eight years ago. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, it is an 80 year old movie. It should have came out a long time ago. It would have killed back then. Yeah. Yeah, Lamar, you don't have to make it as comfortable, dude.

If you're worried about making it as comfortable. Most dangerous thing is an uncomfortable white. I know you work so hard to make me comfortable. I can't even talk about my favorite movie in front of you. I can't even talk about my favorite movie. I can't even talk about all my favorite fucking movies. I can't hang my sponge on. I can't wait for the new color purple to come out. I can't fucking wait.

Is the new color purple coming out? Obviously, dude, there's new elections. It's time to run it back. Sure. Oh, yeah. My mom's all over Christmas. Did she? Yeah, she liked it.

And there's some hungry stomachs going off. Yeah, my stomach will not stop growling. Anytime we try to film, stomach will be going. Rips. I'm wearing a microphone right here. Just mid-scene we'd be talking and eat for like long stretch. Yeah, I Stank stay I feel the tank to the morning. I don't really really yeah I've been hit you politely on the drive. I just I just bought snacks. I was like I don't worry

You're on Adderall and Celsius. You never get on What were the snap was your snack situation nuts peanuts? They have some meat sticks and No, I really read it in these lenses. The dump you take after a 30 hour drive is out. Beautiful. It's beautiful. It's nice relieving. It's gotta be crazy.

Yeah. What's the longest stretch you put in on behind a wheel? I did Florida, Pennsylvania, Arizona. God damn it. I forgot. Through the pandemic, you were fucking. I was a wild. I forgot. We're the pandemic. You were fucking. I was wild.

Yeah. I've done the stretch. So you had to secure the huges. The huger. I'm secured. Yeah, I mean, that's who I was with him. I was like, dude, hook me up with those huges. I'm flying.

But that was during the pandemic. So the whole every road was empty and gas was tensed. So it was fucking cool. Yeah, that's a the pandemic. So every road was empty and gas was 10 cents. So tight. It was fucking cool. Yeah, that's a mystery. And I missed a pandemic, dude. Yeah. It was so much fun.

It was just living like we live now, just guilt free. Well, no one else is doing anything. Yeah, I was just, I can lay around all day for two years straight. It was weird. And you're like, all right, I'll just go, I just sat in my basement and just did weird stuff for a year.

It's pretty tight actually Fear of death, the looming fear of death was kind of tight. Yeah, it was nice Oh, fucking family could die right now. I got I'm never gonna die. I lived my dad. I lived my dad a couple times You are in the pandemic. I was I lived with no lived. I lived him hard early. Yeah, I was like dad stopped going to the fucking bar You're gonna kill mom What shame I Love the dudes that were COVID deniers from the jump that just because they wanted to go to the bar True feelgillous and Tommy. There's the two guys. I knew they're like fucking things bullshit

Never even looked into it once Just come back. I'm not going to bar fuck that Dude, I'm telling you, that becomes like a sacred... You don't realize how like sacred of a space the bar becomes. Let's do, don't even realize it, but they're like... They're in the setting and they're just like, fucking... It's like a ritual. All of a sudden, the shit starts changing and they're just like, yeah!

Yeah, it's a good ritual. You dig into a bar, it's tight. When you dig into a bar and like, go to a bar, so we're gonna slowly get drunk there. It's fucking awesome Yeah, it's very fun. Yeah, it's my favorite thing in the world Especially going when you go to I was with Phil this week just checking out going to his old bars. Mm-hmm shit rules Do they have any like just dudes chilling? Do they have any vet tell you like am vets out here? I mean like a o'clock just in the news and now. I'm sure they do. I'm sure yeah

I'm probably not welcome with many of them I'm right dude I'm so live dude Austin is live They're my good statue of you up I'm probably not welcome do they hate fucking white alphas like me Take charge white alphas the whole last week while you're going that's all I talk that's all I talked about Take charge I had to take charge. You can't do attitude. It's new 2020 for me. That makes sense

And then you got confused can do I had a can do Jake take you to do that If you try to do that take charge attitude Why is my why is my organism being works so hard by the symbolic self? Why is my organism being work so hard by the symbolic self? By my immaterial symbolic story story. Yeah, you can't you can't learn these terms Dude, you gotta stop learning these That's why you're confused. I know dude. I'm telling you I sat there today and I was like Why the fuck am I thinking of the origin of the Rocky my kid asleep, but I'm like I gotta stop thinking started thinking about the before the big bang dude

It's just there's nothing there for me. Yeah, there's nothing about that's what's fucked up And my brain goes right back to it. I'm going okay. Yeah, no, nothing before the big bang dude. Why? It's impossible. Why is impossible? How the big bang happened? Combustion of what nothing avoid it was imposing of what materials. I think it was just God's idea. Okay, there you go. That's a fuck down with that. I'm fucked with that.

And I'm probably facing the deep. The one guy was like, what about people? Shhh, big, big fuck. I don't know what you're getting, it more makes sense. God? Yeah. You start going like, okay, so I was like a germ first and that came

It's especially when I'm a kid. I'm like alright, so I was a germ eventually and then like you have a kid and like it's no you got crisis Yeah, I started going to this is bullshit. You say crisis look. Yeah, dude for real say crisis Lord crisis Lord Hey, thank you You know I've made recently that dude for real people People say everything good day you do science has tried to like slam people for that. It's like dude you guys are literally wasting your time. Yeah So we've started science just the fuck up. It's like bro. Who cares man. I'm more should who may grab it bro? Maybe goddess grab me dude. So I'm talking about That's what I'm talking about yeah, I got I can't stop just

Now I'm on a nice book right now, the invention of the diesel engine. I showed you that. Yes, all right. I'm happy you're on that. That's what it's up. Just a nice tail, a nice linear tail that I'm following that I'm like,

this is fucking fun. That's what dads get into. My dad would sit there and watch how to make things. There was like a history show of how it's made. You just sit there and watch like a factory. Yeah, I like that show actually. So the rules.

It shows really good. The diesel engine was, I didn't know anything about, I like that show actually. So the rules. It shows really good. Diesel engine was, I didn't know anything about, I didn't know how it worked or anything. It's groundbreaking technology. It's like corn, that's the real. It could run, it could burn any fuel. Anything that produces calories, the diesel engine can run on. That's why I was such a threat to the rock and fellers.

Damn. Standard oil. Standard oil, so we got shut this down. Yeah, who was, they don't know. He was found drowned. They don't know who killed him. Or if they, like, I don't think you can't kill yourself by drowning yourself.

Unless you just know damn well you ask, can't swim. And you jump in the water. It was just like, what, where was he found? Ah, dude, I forget. I think it was somewhere like Germany, maybe. He was a... You get taught, you can,

you can toss yourself into a river and drown. True. That's crazy though. If you're gonna kill yourself I can already do that. I killed by exxion triple X Where that's it To walk off from a lazy the mayor so excited to have you dude. Yeah, I can't wait dude. I'm nervous. I'm scared Don't be scared dude. I'm ready to work at the mother ship. You gotta get into the mother ship. That's your goal. Bring your best That's 2024 that's your goal. You gotta get past at the mother ship. Yeah, gotta make Adam like me Can I use some advice? Yeah, you walk in there with a can do you take charge attitude bro? No one can stop you

They don't kick it in the door like give me a job. If they stop you outside and go excuse me Just go guys get the fuck out of my Keep walking. Yeah, it's cops out front. If there's someone else's name on the list Just walk just Kanye right on the stage. Yeah, it's fucking Do your act and you'll get the fucking big wigs attention. Please. Who is this kid? Please? Just kid in the windtown Please just be humble bro. Yeah Yeah, yeah, Because everybody loves you.

You're very likable. Just be humble. It's gonna be fine, dude. It'll be fun. I'll be. Yeah. You know, I'm a blast, bro. You can have too much. Especially with Nathan gets down here. Oh, yeah. I'm so excited for Nate to get down here. Yeah, it'll be nice. I've been doing. I'm talking to Brittany. I'm like, I think we'll be right here now. Yeah, it's nice to have one more. I'm so sick of hanging out with just fucking guardian. Yeah. Socks.

Let's do it. All right, yeah. Let's go over the Patreon.