Mind Pump: Raw Fitness Truth - 081: This Episode Blows
Episode Date: May 18, 2015Is there a topic that Sal, Adam and Justin won't touch? Apparently not. In this episode they discuss their oral preferences in vivid detail. Not for the faint of heart or easily offended....
Transcript
Discussion (0)
If you want to pump your body and expand your mind, there's only one place to go.
MIND, MIND, MIND, MIND, MIND, MIND, with your hosts.
Salda Stefano, Adam Schaefer, and Justin Andrews.
Welcome back to Mind Pump.
This is the podcast that never blows.
We suck.
No, this is...
We don't...
I feel like this is a thing.
I'm here with Justin Andrews.
Yes.
The one and only Sal de Stefano.
Biceps and Adam Schaefer.
That's me.
So, what about, there's one more person in the room bro.
Oh, the dub, the spinner.
The spinner is here.
The spinner is here.
Spinner.
So, no quitter spinner.
What's in your pocket?
What am I, what am I, what am I,
what am I, What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I?
What am I? What am I? What am I? What am I? What am I? because it's pretty funny and it made me think of the flip of what goes through our mind.
So the article is a woman telling the 50 things
that goes through her head when she's giving a blowjob.
So this is what's going through her mind.
Wash, she's giving him.
Yes, and so it goes in order like this.
Oh, so are you guys ready?
You guys ready for this?
Yeah.
Okay. Number one.
All right, I got this. Number two, you're about to rock his world.
Number three, pre-through your nose, you idiot.
Four, I hope my throat won't hurt tomorrow.
Five, should I try butt stuff? Maybe you'll like it.
No, Kristen, don't do it. Six, I'll never understand this hand.
Wait, wait, wait, back up, back up.
I told you it was a let me read it. Back up, well, there's 50, how many of them? hand. Wait, wait, wait, back up, back up. I told you, it was a let me read.
Well, those 50, how many of them?
There's 50, I was on the way through 50, listen.
I'm on there in seven, you got to explain the butt stuff.
What does she mean by that?
Applying it.
Well, she gets to that and tell you,
oh, that's why I want you to let me finish it.
You're gonna hear her tell.
Applier, allow.
Let me finish, let me finish it.
She tells what she's telling her what she's thinking.
Tell her, don't worry, it'll develop.
Shock her. So she says, should I try butt stuff? Maybe he'll's thinking. Don't worry, it'll develop.
So she says, should I try butt stuff? Maybe he'll like it.
No, Kristen, don't do it.
Number six, I will never understand this hand thing.
Number seven, is it supposed to be a lollipop or a popsicle stick?
Number eight, if you touch my head one more time, I'm going to fucking kill you.
Number nine, should I make eye contact?
Number 10, pretty sure it's like a popsicle.
Number 11, just come already.
Number 12, I have so much hair, I wish I had a hair tie.
13, just maybe try butt stuff.
14, make some noise, Kristen.
15, well that was weird.
16, Jesus, Kristen, be careful of the teeth.
17, do you think you felt that?
18, just because you can deep-throw,
doesn't mean that.
19, gags.
20, ooh our parents totally used to give low jobs.
21, maybe they still do.
22, ooh, get that out of your mind.
23, so much hair.
24, okay, here it goes, I'm gonna try some butt.
Nope, nope, what were you thinking, go back up.
Oh, so she was doing it to him. Yes.
Hmm. Okay, number 26. You could try to finger his butt, but you can't ask him to go on a date with you. What is wrong with you?
27. Oh God. Why is this still happening to me? 28. Oh, I can't believe my cat fluffy died rest in peace.
29. Who is the first person to ever do this? 30. turn around every now and then and I get a little bit
Total eclipse of the heart. We need to stop and discuss some of these before we continue
I'm at the you're gonna yeah, you're gonna go all the way through but we need to talk about this is like shotgunning in her head the entire time
Yeah, number one number one. Do they really think of shit when they're giving head?
This is a woman's perspective right here. They're actually thinking
Do they really think of shit when they're giving head? This is a woman's perspective right here.
They're actually thinking about other things
while they're doing it.
Do you not think when you're getting your dick sucked
every now and then about other things?
Are you just totally caught up in the moment?
No, I don't.
What is a guy think when he's getting a blood?
This feels good.
That's about it.
I disagree.
I disagree.
I disagree.
I feel like I have a very similar feeling
when I as a male, because to me, a blowjob isn't a blowjob, dude.
Yeah.
What is it?
Well, I mean, it's a lot's art.
There's a lot going on there.
There's a lot of the techniques.
There's a lot of things that could be happening.
And I'm not happening very well.
So there's a lot going through my head.
If it's a bad job going on here like tell me you've never had a group
Damn, I wish you were you know use some lotion
Well tell me you like she even says it right here. She goes is it supposed to be is it supposed to be a popsicle or a lollipop?
Have you ever had a girl forget whatever it is?
Just don't chew on it. Well, yeah, but if you ever had a girl like you know like tongue like around like
Tongue around I think here's a thing this This is, I'm gonna rewind for a second.
This gets specific.
Here's where women, here's why I think a woman
is in the disadvantage.
Okay, it's not the blow job, it's the hand job.
Let me tell you why, because I don't care how good
you think you are.
You can't be better than that.
You're not gonna be better than a dude.
We've been practicing for a year.
Yeah, exactly.
Yeah, you know, come on, we've been mastered it.
Every day.
That's why I call it masterbating. Yeah, master. Yeah, well mean, oh, come on, we've been mastered it every day. That's why I call it master baiting.
Yeah, master.
Yeah, well, that's also master of my domain.
That's also why we're talking my head right now though.
So and head we can't give you.
Everybody's right, all right, whoa, whoa, whoa.
So, but we've tried.
Every, every, every, every, every man is filling off the toilet seat,
trying to make that happen
God damn it. I just had anybody ever Successful with that Maryland Maryland, Maryland, Manson had his two bottom roll. Yeah, that's a legend
That is not a urban legend. Yeah, that here. You saw it. He had no one in it's
Come on, that you know he had his two bottom ribs removed so you can suck it
That's an urban myth. You think so you don have to be. I'm gonna try it. Okay.
When I get super rich,
I don't need all my ribs.
I'm gonna take them again.
I'm gonna take them to our house.
It's just for me.
I don't need my ribs anymore.
Yeah.
We're like,
Adam never goes out anymore.
Why is it always at home?
That's what the screams are for.
So okay.
I mean, I want to go back to what you guys think that,
to me, I mean,
and maybe that's,
and it's funny because I don't think,
I have buddies that are just like, blow job and maybe that's in its funny because I don't think I have buddies
that are just like blow job guys.
That's their thing.
Oh God, you get your dick sucked.
They're get your dick sucked
is the best thing in the world.
And I'm kind of like, yeah, here,
this, it's gotta be extra special for me
to be really, really into it.
Because I'm with you on that.
I wanna get to the point.
Let's get to the driving. And you know to the driving and you know it to me. It takes it a weird barrel. It takes a some serious
Let's bring this
Your so romantic
You're so romantic I think you know your hands
I'm gonna get you kids you're like this baby. I'm into the business. I'm gonna push you across the floor like a wedding
So I chariot so I would actually you know I would I would turn one down if if
What whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa you would turn down? Oh?
No, no, no, you know what I can't be your friend anymore. Well, you guys are both married guys too
So tell you different for you. What's totally different?
Why would anyone turn a blowjob down?
That's because I think you're lying. I'm not lying. I bet you if Doug said right now he'd give you a blowjob
Because nobody turns a blowjob
This is why because a girl just like this that we're reading this has sucked my dick before just like this and all that shit
That's going through her head,
it displays in her job.
Oh, her work ethic is displayed when she's thinking
all this shit, bro, and she's confused,
and she don't know she's good.
You're too analytical.
I just kinda let him do this.
But a crappy blow job's got to be better than no blow job.
No, no blow job's better than just.
Like Justin said, I'd rather go right to Wheel Bear Island.
Right, yeah.
She's a wheel bear on it.'s a thing the spider-man. I would I would write I'm skip spider-man
Skip the blowjob thing and most certainly if you try and sneak a finger in my asshole
I were doing it really good
You got to be more open-minded Adam. So listen here listen here. That's your fun button
She's a brown button.
We're on 31.
She has to go pee.
Now we're 31.
I think I have to go pee.
32.
Oh, my right hand.
33.
He's making weird noises.
So this can't suck.
34.
It probably sucks.
35.
Ah, sucks.
Stop you there.
It does suck when they grab too hard.
And you're like, ah, yes.
You're nuts need to be very, very gently fond of it.
Yeah. Or you tell me you're stuck. There's to be very very gently fond of it. Yeah. Yeah. I don't mind a swift punch to the balls
I'm just kidding. Oh my god. Honey. I'm joking. Yeah, but there's on the serious. She's probably gonna push the balls. Yeah, address the balls. Yeah, you got to acknowledge them. They're there. I mean, before I go on, I feel like this is okay. This is this is turning into a good
discussion here because I feel like we're not all on the same page here. So we
needed to we need to draw the line in the fucking sand here and decide what are
some do's and don'ts for you in a blowjob then. If you guys are gonna fight me
all the way that like any blowjob is better than not a blowjob. Okay fine. Okay.
Well then tell me what are do's,
are there do's and don't see you or like any,
she could be scraping her teeth on you,
squeezing your nuts back and, you know,
what's the deal here, bro?
It's turned on over here.
Well, the Texas twister.
Yeah, don't do that.
What is it?
What can she, what can she do and what can she not do
and what does it for you?
Do you, are you a finger in the butthole guy?
I, you know, I'm an, let's be honest,
this is the roughness.
This is the roughness, that's just.
Rough, fitness, truth.
Yeah, sounds a butthole guy.
No, no, no.
Listen to this bro, he's a butthole guy.
You're a butthole guy, rock and tell,
dude, listen, you just gave you a wink.
He does, he has to be the brown eye wink.
He has a butthole smirk, dude.
I can tell.
The butthole smirk.
Are you, is like an index figure or thumb?
What is it? What are you okay with? Tell is like an index figure of thumb. What is it?
What are you okay with?
Teller audience.
Teller audience.
She's like, only when I get my prostate checked.
Thank you.
No, listen.
If you don't, you gotta be next to him.
I see your wife.
I'm gonna ask her straight up.
So, I'm gonna say your,
what are you gonna ask her?
I'm gonna say, a salad butthole guy.
Yeah.
She's gonna come straight up.
She's gonna be like, why are you asking?
I will, I'll just ask you.
You know me.
Tell the truth right now. So, this is why we don't bring our wives on this show yeah
yeah somebody asked somebody asked that as a question he did that's never gonna happen like bring
your girls on the show like yeah I'll tell you I'll tell you what I am a nipple guy oh fuck
I hate that dude I hate when a girl twist your nipple really oh it creeps me out I got sensitive
nipples did you really just creeps me out. I got sensitive nipples, dude.
You don't really?
I just creeps me out.
I ain't by test.
I don't know if it goes all the way back to being a kid
when people just do titties,
or something like that, I used to fucking hate with somebody.
Wait a minute, see you're gonna get sucked in the face.
That's part of it.
Wait, you don't like butt stuff.
You don't like nipple stuff.
No, boring.
What else is there?
Yeah, you just like dick.
Just basically just spend time on my dick.
Do you have everything else alone that I got?
No, I'll go on my turn.
I wanna hear all your stuff.
You like them to suck your toes or something weird?
No, I will describe my perfect blowjob.
You know what, you're a butt hole guy.
Because you talk about cleaning your ass
and having everything wax and shape it up.
I keep it clean because her nose is about three inches
from it when she suck in my dick
and I don't want her to smell shit
while she's doing that. That's why I keep that nothing to I take the first time someone lick my butthole I'd kill the mood for me for sure
So I feel like this got really real yeah, it is and I'm and I'm gonna pull it out of the both of you two
Cuz I know
So I hit give me give me this is fun.
Give me the perfect give me the perfect blow job, bro.
I'll sweat give me the perfect blow job.
Oh, come on.
We want me to start with perfect.
Yes, you put me on the spot.
Yes.
Lots I like pretend here on this cucumber.
OK.
Let me demonstrate.
Grab them by quick.
Yeah, let me demonstrate.
You got to you at hand. There's got to be
that emotion. Okay. And there's got to be a lot of a lot of spit. You got to have a lot of saliva.
Okay. Okay. That's important. Good detail. And every once in a while, a filthy words got to
come out of your mouth. Oh, you wanted to talk shit to you. I like, I like the dirty talk. I
definitely do because I'm a cerebral person. So if you're talking to me and it's filthy,
that actually is more turn on than anything.
You could do anything to me.
You could hold my hand, say something filthy,
and I'm like, okay, very close.
Good, now we're getting some truth coming out here.
All right, no, I think that's it, though.
She just got to hold your dick and talk shit to you, boy.
I, like right now, the girls are like,
oh, that's the easiest blowjob ever.
Yeah, that would be so.
I was gonna know that.
Yeah, that's right.
I was doing all this extra work before. All right, what about you, Adam? Perfect blowjob ever. That would be so nice. I was gonna know that. Yeah. I was doing all this extra work before.
All right, what about you, Adam?
Pervy Blowjob for me?
Yeah.
I actually like my balls cradle with one hand.
I like how you're holding him like this.
Yeah, I want her to cradle my, we got weight to it.
Yeah, they do, they have weight.
They got weight serious weight.
So she might have to switch hands halfway through.
I want to know.
You know what, you just did the hand movement, like Indiana Jones did when he switched out the fucking sand
That you okay, yes, it's just a switch out. That's a very good point. You got to switch out that gentle too
Because my they're sensitive. I don't want them squeeze she throws them all in our soul. Hitchin the face
I don't I don't like the you know what are those stress balls that people play with and they don't do that
She with my nuts. I don't want to they're not Chinese stress balls. Yeah, they're not
Chinese stress balls. You know, fucking spin them around in your hand. Just hold them. Just
hold them so they feel safe. So you don't want to do it. Why lowly labyrinth? No, no. So
I want, I want, I want my balls. I want my balls cupped. I want the other hand on my
shaft. And then I want, I want you as he's so specific. I love this on my shaft and then I want I want you
He's so specific. I love this. Well, and then you're and then you're you're buried as far down as you can get without Spraying with your teeth. I do not like no teeth dude no teeth lots of saliva
And you know what every once in a while when you do come up for air. I like a little shit talking
I do enjoy that too. That's it. I do like do you like mean shit talk or like you know like just filthy or
do you know what I mean like filthy or mean like mean would be like you suck or do you like
the filthy stuff. You know what I like the way it tastes. What I would like it like what I like with my girlfriend kill me for Tom. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, was very happy. So in gentlemen, hypothetical, you know, wouldn't with different, you know, saying so like you can't you can't you can't come the same the same shit talk
It was isn't as powerful as a shit talk followed by the next time it's something filthy the next time it's talking shit
So you know the surprise is half the hot part, you know, I'm saying is not knowing what's gonna come out of her mouth
And then she said because I know like, I've known some girls. So you
like, you like a big stories that I've heard. So basically you like a Tourette style blow
job.
When she comes up, you know, some shit like, no, yeah, ass cock. Yeah. So bitch. And I
cannot stand, you know, the, like, the freight, the freight to take it, man.
If you, if you can't take it, if you can't take it all,
I grab hold of the rail and let's go, right?
Yeah.
And, and you do need to use hand with the lips because you can't just do one.
You can't do one or the other.
It's got to be both, both together.
And you got to be someone who's down to swallow.
If you're, if you're, if you're, you brought that way, man, there we go.
Yeah.
If you're shooting on my chest or here, let me get a towel.
And then we go running this bathroom and spit it out.
Like, you know, we're not gonna be doing this very often.
You don't like to see it all over the place.
That's what I do.
Oh, what's in a blue moon?
Because then, you know, because you could, but there's actually a sub blue moon.
I want to shoot it all over your face.
There's actually a supplement you can buy.
And I want the listeners.
I swear to God, you could look it up.
Pineapple juice?
No, it's called ball refill.
It's made by, it's a supplement. I swearore to God someone sent this to me a picture of this
It's a supplement made by I think Goliath Labs the name of the supplements called ball refill and it literally says on there
And we have a promo code yeah
It literally says on there increases seminal volume
It's still works so gross. I have no idea, but I'm never... Okay, kid. Can't throw up. But I never said that to myself and said,
you know, that was good sex, but I have more for you.
Yeah, I just, what more semen coming out of me?
Well, no, now back up there a little bit.
Now, there's been times when you, okay,
we've all, everyone's had a lot, a little on medium, right?
You've had, you've had a explosion and you've had a,
and when you, when you explode, bro, it's better and when you when you explode bro
It's better than when you just kind of
No, I mean no I mean believe drop. Oh bro when when I like to orgasm so hard it hurts there's you it hurts me
Yeah, it hurts me it blows it feels like I'm shooting like three inch pebbles out of my
You might want to go get checked out.
Marbles.
I think, this is a good time to switch to Justin because I think,
Justin would just keep getting a more descriptive.
Justin, what's your perfect blow job?
Yeah, so, okay, I'm a little more delicate than you guys I feel.
Like, I like a nice light tone.
He wants to be stroked. No, very like you got to like go really soft and
like go all the way up and then back and then you get you got to dress the balls. You got
to look at the balls. Oh, you got to look like you like the ball. It's the balls. It's not
a great. There were everyone's very different. These are all good points. So lady listeners
should be paying attention right now. Not everybody is the same. So you got you got one cool move
and you use it on every dude you fucked with. Like it's not a good idea.
No, no, no, no.
And like you said, like there has to be like a dual, you know,
action going on with the mouth, the hand, you know, that kind of thing.
Like that's where it takes, you know, practice and talent.
Ladies, practice.
Yeah, practice.
Let's get that going.
This is like, this is the worst episode.
Yeah, it is.
So, but no, no butt stuff and no nipple stuff.
No, no, no, no, no, absolutely no, stuff and no nipple stuff. No, no, no, no.
Oh, absolutely no, yeah, no nipple.
You're open to more ass before me. Yeah, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no,? Or feet. No, no, no, no, no, no.
Don't touch my feet.
I'm so sensitive on my feet, I'll kick someone
in the face.
They try to even touch my feet.
So, so the whole butt thing, you know, in the nipple thing,
obviously I'm sure you guys have tried the nipple thing.
Every chick's tried to do that.
Oh yeah, yeah.
Well, they did.
But I feel like a lot of people are like the butt thing
is super taboo just because it's like,
it might be gay or whatever, you know what I'm saying? No. No? No. I'm not homophobic. I'm saying. I know I think some people may
think. I think some people do. I don't think that way. I just don't. My, I don't know. My ass hole is
one of those areas that I just I take very good care of it. I don't want to mess with. I don't want
to expand it. I don't want to be sure. It's an exit only. I don't, you know, like, I just don't want to expand it. I don't want to be. It's an exit only. I don't you know, I just don't get it. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you know, like, you know, squeeze my ass, slap my ass cheeks.
That's all good. But you know, you start putting things up in my, my rear. I'm not comfortable,
dude. And you know what? I, like I said, I, I'll never forget the first time that a girl stuck her
tongue in my butthole, but it was, it was very uncomfortable for me. I did not like it. And I know
guys that love that shit, dude,
because it's filthy,
because they think it's sexy,
because it's filthy and it's dirty.
And for me, it just killed the mood, dude.
I was like,
this would be too hot for TV.
I think we might have actually crossed the line.
You guys always say that.
I know.
And I know.
We never crossed the line.
You know why?
We haven't, because there is no line.
Let's be sure there's no line.
There's no line.
There's no line.
Like Adam literally started off the converse that this show.
And he's like, hey guys, we're going to talk about, probably about blow jobs.
And we're like, okay.
There was no debate.
There was no argument.
We're like, yeah, right.
We'll talk about blow jobs.
We can do that.
So take a ways.
We got to give, take a ways from this, this, this, this episode.
Yeah.
So number one, number one, use your hand with your mouth.
Yeah. Right?
Yeah. Important. Takeaways, we gotta give takeaways from this episode. Yeah, so number one, use your hand with your mouth. Yeah, right?
Important, very important.
Okay, we all agree on cupping the balls.
That's what we should find.
What are the things we all agreed on?
Hand in mouth.
Yeah, don't forget about balls.
Don't forget about balls is better than just cupping
because someone might like cupping,
someone might like pulling or twisting.
Okay, so then maybe you need to explore
and figure out what he likes with the balls.
But there's definitely something there.
That's right, do not neglect them.
Yeah.
What a dirty talk.
Oh, dirty talk.
Just a very important question.
Yeah, like sweet talk.
You don't like dirty talk?
You like more like, oh, I can't text.
I can't text, I can't text.
But no, but no dirty talk.
Does that turn you off?
Well, and then let me play with them, you know,
well, it's happening. What do you mean like 69 style? Oh, I say what you're saying
No, we haven't a Doug. What do you think of this episode? What do you think about what we're talking about here? You think this is important to I mean it's like
Doug's like right. I'm gonna have to edit this whole thing.
That's what this episode is.
One of those things that make me say, hmm.
Yeah, well, I, you know,
Doug can't talk to my ship because when we started this,
I saw Doug pull his notebook out
and he's been taking notes this whole time.
He's over there taking notes.
I know I'll have to try this.
Yeah, he's like, oh, I didn't think about that. A titty twister with a finger in the butthole at know it's hyper-try this. Yeah, he's like, ooh.
I didn't think about that.
A titty twister with a finger in the butthole at the same time.
We could do this.
Why you talk some shit to me?
Yeah.
Yeah.
Boom.
Yeah, I know.
I think so.
I think, let me finish.
Oh, there's more on there.
That's why we haven't even gone all through all 50.
Yeah, no, she's at, we're at, yeah.
We're talking about techniques. I'm uncomfortable about like, you no, she's that we're at, we're talking about techniques.
I'm uncomfortable about like, you know, what's going through their mind while they're doing this.
So I'm wondering what, okay, so on the flip side of that, what, you know, what you guys are
thinking of if you're doing Felatio. Felatio. So it, oh, with why, why we are down on a girl.
Right. Isn't that the flip to that? That is the that is the flip. Okay, so
that I think the number one thing that goes through my head before I head down there is you're just please God. Oh, no, please God
Let it be taken care of. Yeah. Yes, please. Please God. Let it let it let it be fresh and and and not be bad because that is just
Let it let it be fresh and and and not be bad because that is just that's tough man. What do you do? Do you reverse do this reverse direction? You didn't you just make you I mean I've got a pretty good
question mark. Yeah, it is like it's like that. It's like oh just going down there to kiss some thighs and work my way up
The stomach and then I'm right back up
Girl because that's all bad dude and that's you you know, that's why, if you've been listening
to mind pumps at the beginning,
you should know better by now.
Do you get your fucking baby wipes out, you know?
You should know by now.
If you're a chick, that's not just for me,
that's for you too.
That's for everybody.
Take care of your shit, especially if you have someone
that's gonna be going down on it.
You know, that being said, we need,
I think the first sponsorship we should have is wipes.
I mean, we've sold, we must have sold thousands
of wipes by now, just from some of the stuff
that you're talking about, Adam.
You're like the best wipes salesman I've ever met.
Well, wipes and it's Summers Eve,
those are two clutch ones right there.
Summers Eve and both, bro.
Yeah, actually, you know, there isn't a line for dudes,
there should be.
There should be, and like what a mass douche.
You're definitely a splat.
That doesn't have to be a douche, bro.
It's just a soap that's okay for like internal.
Like it doesn't, it doesn't, like you,
you shouldn't take a bar soap and shove it up your ass
case you're wondering.
It's not, it's not a good idea, dude.
It's not soap, that's a good idea.
You know, like the antibacterial stuff that's on it,
it'll dry your ass hole out.
That'll probably be fucking hurting you.
And if anyone's ever tried to wash their butt hole out
with regular bar soap, they probably know
that this has happened to them.
So if you use summer's eve, it's, you know,
it's, it doesn't have that same, yeah, it takes
care of.
So you can clean.
You learn something every day, Justin.
I can hang out with me.
I have, hey, yeah.
I think we killed Justin.
I think Justin.
I think Justin is the straw that broke my back.
Yeah, I think he just died.
Well, you know, these, I don't know, these are things that if you, if you, if you plan
on wanting to have good oral sex and you don't want somebody to do the question mark,
like Justin said, you probably should take care of your shit.
So male or female, literally.
And you know, don't just because your guy,
don't be afraid to walk down the chick guy,
I'll go buy some, you know, purple or pink summer's eve
just because it's a chick's color on the thing.
It's because they don't make a man's one.
Yeah, dude, step your game up, bro.
We should, let's, let's invent one.
What would we call it?
Well, let's see, opposite summer's eve. Summer's eve, Adam's, what's the opposite? There's some where's e Adam's Adam's evening like Adam Adam's Adam's
Adam's something Adam's freshness. Yeah, all right
Uh, musky, man. All right listeners Adam's freshness if that's something you'd be interested in
Please go to mine pump on that Instagram. Let us know and maybe we'll put that together Adam's freshness
Yeah, I like that. I like that a lot. All right, where are we at here? We're at 30, 37, okay.
She just said, okay, I'm over this.
37, he better go down on me this long.
38, I wish I had a dick.
39, when can women's tough giving blow jobs?
40, turn around, right eyes.
Every now and then I fall apart.
41, I wonder if he is in love with me yet.
42, I better be getting breakfast in the morning.
43, look who's ready to come.
44, yes, bring it on.
45, where is it?
46, oh God, it's happening.
47, just smile.
48, good job, sport.
46, well now that's over, my turn.
50, oh no, he's tired, loser.
Oh, you went from 46 to 50, just FY.
It's interesting when you start talking about this kind of stuff,
how your mind, you can't focus on anything other than
the whole blowjob thing.
You know what I'm saying?
Because while you were talking, I'm like,
you know, your brain just goes off in that hole,
in that whole thing there.
So yeah, I don't know.
Bless your vacation.
Yeah, I don't really think about anything when I do that.
I'm in the moment.
You have some of the worst answers sometimes.
Bro, I'm in the moment.
I'm there.
You're like, you have both extremes.
You either have a great answer that everybody loves.
That is super.
You can't critique my answer.
I can't do.
I can do what I want.
This is our show.
I can do whatever it wants to.
And I'm critiquing your answers.
Sometimes, whenever we talk about something that's fitness-related, I can't do, I can do what a fuck I want. This is our show. I can do whatever I want to do. And I'm critiquing your answers.
Sometimes, whenever we talk about something
that's fitness-related, educated business,
you always have something great to say.
As soon as we move over to assholes and boobies and vaginas,
all the science, man.
All the science, yeah, we're the science.
We're all said you get shy.
All said you get shy on me.
And you have these great answers.
There's no shyness.
You're in the moment.
You should be in the moment.
You're doing it.
Well yeah, no shit you're in the moment.
I'm not thinking about, you know, thinking about.
But you mean that mind of yours that never shuts off.
Austin shuts off when you're in vagina land?
Absolutely.
It does not.
It does not.
Our brains don't work that way.
We're all like each other.
I know that.
Our brains constantly go.
We don't even sleep, bro. Just go all the time. So I know I know you're thinking about you're lucky. You're not a chick
Just what about you, dude? I just go
Yeah, I'm just excited to be there. I'm just excited and you know then I then I try and focus. And then I'm like, okay, I gotta focus.
I gotta make this happen in a reasonable amount of time.
I'm gonna make sure that kids don't wake up.
Oh, the dog's barking.
Yeah, like, there's always like distractions and stuff.
See, that's better answer.
I feel like I'm listening for cues.
Like I'm so, and I don't know if it's just everything I do,
whether it be going down on vagina
or working a business or a sport.
It's all the same.
It's all the same.
I give everything I got no matter what I'm doing.
I wanna be great at whatever I do.
So I take a lot of pride in what I'm doing.
So when I'm down there, like I am focused on, you know,
what is she giving back to me right now?
What are her signals right now, dude?
Well, that's what I mean by being in the moment, dude.
I don't mean being brain dead.
Well, you brain the moment because-
You started brain dead when you answered that.
No, because you're reading a list of things
that a chick is thinking and half of them
have nothing to do with the blowjob.
Like half of them are like, oh, what about this?
So what, you know, what's going on?
Yeah, but we switched gears over to what we would be thinking about.
Yeah, in the moment means you're listening to her,
what she, you know, what's going,
how is she's responding, what you're doing, you know, what else you can do. That's what I mean by in the moment means you're you're listening to her what she you know what's going how she's responding
what you're doing you know what else you can do that's that's what I mean by in the moment okay well if you were referencing techniques if you would give a better if you would give a better
answer like that then now now some people can get the whole idea of this radio show is that people
get good information not just a bunch of bullshit so if you say something like that then someone goes
okay so now that's it now that's a good point for a woman to think
Hey, when it feels good and he's hitting the right spot, you should probably give him some sort of a signal
I think this is probably one of the most informative episodes. There you go. That's what I would say. So there you go
So if she's if he's hitting the right, it's helps for sure. I annoise a squirm a back arch
Yes, something you know like that the signals of it that feels amazing right there or even right there
That's always a great just grab my head move it there you go see that there's there's there's there
These are all very good points that you know, and I know oh wait
I forgot sounds been married forever so he probably doesn't know but maybe Justin it never
Just way back one
I will come out and be the guy who always gets thrown
on the bus in the situation.
Like, you've been with a girl who lays there like a stiff board,
who doesn't do anything.
No noise, no sound, just lays there.
Doesn't matter.
You can be doing back flips and she isn't giving you anything.
And maybe in her head it was like some of the best sex
or the best, you know, head she's ever had in her life.
But you, you leave so un, you know, I feel,
um, like a failure.
Yeah.
I so like, no, you need that feedback.
You do.
You do.
And then you always try and return to try and see, like, maybe it was just a fluke
that one time and then it happens again.
You're just like, fuck, it's not me.
It's her.
Yeah.
Because I brought out all my best moves and I couldn't even get, couldn't even get anything
made for you.
So give us feedback, dude.
You gotta let us know if we're working too hard and not hard enough for written rights
fodder or whatever.
Like Justin said, got my fucking head, just put it there.
That's it.
Do it.
Thank you for listening to Mind Pump.
For more information about this show and to get valuable free resources from Sal, Adam
and Justin, visit us at www.minepompradio.com.
Until next time, this is Mind Pump.