Mind Pump: Raw Fitness Truth - 1272: COVID-19 & How to Cope with Fear & Anxiety
Episode Date: April 16, 2020COVID-19 has everyone on edge and in this episode, Sal, Adam and Justin discuss fear and anxiety and how to manage it through this crisis. How do we mentally prepare to reemerge back into society? (4...:16) How fear can drive irrational behavior and distort perception. (9:00) Mind Pump shares personal accounts of coping with fear and anxiety. (12:50) What fear does to the body. (23:10) Actionable options to manage fear and anxiety. (31:25) Related Links/Products Mentioned April Promotion: MAPS Prime/Prime Pro ½ off! **Code “PRIME50” at checkout** Special Promotion: MAPS Anywhere ½ off!! **Code “WHITE50” at checkout** Visit Legion Athletics for the exclusive offer for Mind Pump listeners! **Code “mindpump” at checkout** Red Dot Fitness Antibody Test Chronic Stress Can Damage Brain Structure and Connectivity Digestive Problems and the Effects of Anxiety How to Stop Stress From Destroying Your Fertility Mind Pump #1265: How to Develop a Winning Mindset 5 Ways to Rewire Your Brain to Deal With Coronavirus Stress Physical Activity Reduces Stress Visit Brain.fm for an exclusive offer for Mind Pump listeners. Mind Pump Free Resources People Mentioned Layne Norton, PhD (@biolayne) Instagram Jessica Di Stefano (@thetraininghour) Instagram
Transcript
Discussion (0)
If you want to pump your body and expand your mind, there's only one place to Weird times right now, right? We're all dealing with this COVID-19
situation. A lot of businesses have had to shut down. We're all self isolating.
Uncertain scary times. And you know, we were thinking about gosh, you know,
they're going to tell us all to go back to work pretty soon.
And we're going to have to not just deal with the, you know, being perclosious and making sure we don't catch
or spread this virus, but also have the deal with the
fear and anxiety of being out in the world.
And so in this episode, we talk about our own personal
experiences with fear and anxiety.
Why, how chronic fear drove our behaviors in correct ways,
and ways that were detrimental. how chronic fear drove our behaviors in incorrect ways
and ways that were detrimental. We talk about what fear does to the body,
why it's essential, but also why chronic fear
can actually be a huge health problem,
how it affects your digestive system, your brain,
your thoughts, and how chronic fear can cause
a lot of problems.
And then we give you actionable, constructive options,
things that you can do for yourself to not just manage fear,
but to bring it to healthy level so that it's rational
and no longer irrational.
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and use the code prime50. That's PRIME50, no space for the discount. I was thinking about this a lot,
you know, the other day, because we are getting to the point where we're going to have to,
we're in between a rock and a hard place.
Like, the rock is, there's a virus that's out there,
that's, you know, it can be dangerous for some people.
We don't want it to spread really fast.
Not going out there, not going to work,
not being around people prevents the spread of it.
This is a fact, right?
The social distancing works in that sense.
But here's the other fact,
we can't social distance ourselves for that much longer.
Definitely not forever,
but definitely not,
probably not for that much longer.
We've seen record numbers of unemployment.
We need people to make products,
we need people to provide services, we need people to provide services,
we need the sense of purpose going out there. And it made me think to myself of like an analogy of
like you're, you know, you're in a cave with your family and you need food, you're hungry,
your kids are hungry, you haven't eaten in days, and you look out in the cave and you see lions
every once in a while roaming around
and you know if you go out there there's going to be a risk of getting killed but you but
if you don't you know you're going to starve and I feel like we're reaching that point
because I mean people think when they think economics they think you know oh not not
a lot some people will lose some money and have a big deal.
It could be a very big deal,
and we're reaching that point,
and I started to think about it,
and I started to get scared,
and I started to think,
God, what is it gonna be like when,
because we are gonna get the order,
pretty soon, states are gonna start saying to people,
go out there, we gotta get back to work,
we gotta get back to our regular lives,
but now we've been so scared with all this information, And I thought, how is that going to affect people's behaviors, how it's affecting our
health? Like fear itself is something that we also need to to to pay attention to. You know what I'm
saying? Well, it's also this is a very touchy subject, right? Because, man, I went down the rabbit hole
of reading your conversation back and forth
on Lane's page.
And, you know, boy, you got all kinds of hate over it
because people misinterpret what you're saying right now
to, you know, you're pushing the agenda of,
oh, we shouldn't social distance
and let's just get everybody out there and this is all a bullshit or like I think this is a conspiracy. No, no, no, no, no, I want to be clear.
I'm not an expert. I'm not an infectious disease expert. I don't know when when the right time is to go
out into the world and go back to regular life or closer to regular life. I'm saying when the
experts tell us to do that, right. And I'm saying that they're probably going to say it.
It's inevitable to come.
Yes.
So it's like how do we mentally prepare to then re-emerge out of this as I look at it as more
of like a storm.
Like, we're all kind of weathering this together.
But now, you know, and there may be more storms that come, but like, we have to live our lives
and what does that look like now?
Well, you're, I think you give a great analogy,
and I guess the question is this,
is are we starving yet?
Or are we borderline gonna die of not eating?
And of course, that's the analogy for the line.
We're not all gonna,
that's not gonna happen for us here in modern times,
but we can starve our economy at one point, right?
I mean, at one point, if we shut everything down,
let's say it's a year straight,
I mean, it would have this catastrophic,
everlasting response from that if that were to happen, right?
And now we're not gonna be shut down for a year,
but then where's the place at?
Is it two months, is it three months, is it nine months,
or is it soon, like where is it that, you know,
okay, we have to eat, we have to keep this thing moving,
and at what point does the staying in become more risky
than going out and taking your chances with the line?
There's a lot of people that are waiting and going to rely on and need this check from
the government that could be $1200, $2400, whatever.
They need it because they're not going to be able to make it without it.
That's one check.
That's over.
How long has the country been effectively shut down now, four weeks, five weeks, whatever?
So we're going gonna get another one.
My point is they're going to tell us
we need to go out into the world.
The virus is still out there.
It's still gonna be out there.
It's not gonna disappear.
It's still gonna be out there.
So what I'm thinking, what I'm saying,
and I'm, look, I think we should be cautious
and we should be safe.
But what I'm saying is, is that we need to consider
the impact of our fear,
because fear, although it's a valuable feeling, we need it, it can also drive irrational
behaviors and it can distort. It can distort your perception of things.
When people go swim in the ocean, you ask them what they're afraid of. More people will tell
you they're afraid of getting eaten by a shark than they are of drowning.
The odds of drowning are so much higher.
When we drive in our cars every single day,
we run a, especially when you consider over your whole lifetime,
it's not an insignificant risk of getting in a car accident.
But we get in our car, and I'm not afraid every time I get in my car,
I just get in my car and I go.
Isn't that interesting? You know what it is though, right?
It's the two examples that you're giving right now.
One of them is in our control.
The other one is not, right?
If I go swimming, you know, I, and I drown, it's by my own cause.
If I get attacked by a shark, I didn't something else, then outside forth.
That's what we're facing right now is this outside force and infectious disease that we don't have a vaccine for.
And the what if becomes scarier potentially than the actual likelihood of it
actually killing you totally.
And this is a big thing, you know, in something like 20% this is a big chunk,
right? 20% of Americans have like diagnosed chronic anxiety type issues.
It's growing.
This is before, by the way, all this went down.
So this is before, I would have to guess, again, I'm not a health expert on this, but I
would have to guess that number's higher now, right?
I would have to guess that there's probably more people right now suffering from chronic
fear or anxiety than before. But so before all this one went down,
20% of people had diagnosable anxiety type issues.
And that drives a lot of your behaviors.
It drives the way that your brain perceives
and remembers and thinks of things.
I mean, it's funny because recently,
I did an antibody test for COVID,
and I was sure that I would come out positive.
Actually came back negative, right?
I got the test back.
I don't have antibodies.
And for a short period of time, I felt more fear again.
All of a sudden, I felt vulnerable.
Oh, I'm gonna go out there.
Maybe I can get a bit,
but when I was thinking I had it before,
I all of a sudden was my fear.
Now, I didn't change my behaviors either way in the sense that I was still washing my
hands or whatever, but I know that fear can be a very powerful motivator, and it can
have some really negative detrimental effects on your health.
So we need to think about how to handle that as we start to move forward.
Well, you have to recognize too that percentage that you just brought up about anxiety and
fear and people, I wish I remember the statistic on this, but I know it was north of 50% of
those people have multiple types of fear.
So it's almost like a characteristic that a person has.
So once you accept that you are fearful of things,
you're more likely to be fearful of other things too.
It's a state of mind.
Right. And that is just a trickling.
If you know the number one reason
why businesses or anything for this matter,
even fitness goals fail,
is just the failure to start and begin.
Because you're a failure.
Yeah, a fear of failure.
And it's also the number one thing
that feeds procrastination.
You know, I'm afraid that I'm not gonna be good at it.
I'm afraid it's not gonna hold on to it.
You wanna launch it, it's your comfort zone.
Yeah, the minute that you decide to put it out there,
you can get judged.
It's gonna take on its form of like either it's gonna win
or it's gonna fail.
And that is something that's very scary
for a lot of people to get going. and that's something that'll hold you back
Almost indefinitely unless you address it. I'll give you an example like years ago
My house got robbed right we yeah, I was at work and I get a call from you know my at the time my wife and you know
Somebody you know broken the house and ransacked so I jam over there and
They someone broken you know took a bunch of stuff went through all the house and ran, so I jammed over there. And they, someone broke in, took a bunch of stuff, went through all the drawers, and
there was a big mess or whatever.
Obviously nobody was home, nobody at her.
And this happens sometimes to people.
But I have a family, I have children.
I remember them going, they went through my kids' rooms, they stole my kids' piggy bank.
The thought of some other person in my kids' room going through the stuff. So violated. Yes, they went through my kids rooms. They stole my kids piggy bank. The thought of some other person in my kids room
going through so violently.
Yes, they went through my wife's underwear drawer.
You know, the thought of some person doing that wherever.
And being the father, having the fear of,
what if I'm at work or what if I'm on a business trip
and something happens.
And that fear drove me to make some pretty silly,
I'm looking back silly decisions. I bought a crossbow
I bought a sword I had a sword next to my bed
Crossbow because let me hear the logic behind you. You know why I'm watching walking dead
No, no, no, no, I'm gonna hear the logic
I'm not because I mean I would I okay
I would I've been I've been you a robbed or or two of my cars have been stolen.
I think shotgun.
So why a crossbow?
Because you have to wait.
Because I got the gun, I went to go get the gun,
you got to wait 10 days.
I'm getting the crossbow.
But there's an example, what a great example.
You were so fearful at the moment,
this could happen again, that I can't wait 10 days
for the shotgun.
I needed a crossbow for tomorrow.
I got a suit, come back tomorrow.
I got this fricking black blade, weird sword looking thing
that I could get.
It's the fastest thing I could in my house.
Put it next to my bed.
Just in case I couldn't get to something fast enough that I'd go through hacking with
it.
I mean, just, and every noise I heard for a month afterwards, I was on hyper alert.
And everybody that walked in our neighborhood that I didn't recognize, I'm gonna watch you, you know what I mean?
But it drove me, this fear drove me,
and if I had let it, it could have,
now luckily I was okay, everything was fine,
but I could see, I experienced what that didn't,
how that drove my behaviors and things,
and a lot of those were irrational,
because the odds of something bad happening again
We're still low. You know you can do the rational stuff getting alarm system and all that stuff
But boy did it drive well, and that's an acute situation too
I wonder how much of that is like how much that overall situation then has this compounding
Effect of built anxiety inside you and that just feeds into everything else that you feel anxious or
nervous or fearful of too. Well, you see that too when people will have like a woman who's
assaulted by a man and then now she's fearful of men. You know, that's like a, that can cause that,
right? We're now I'm afraid of men because one time I was assaulted by a person, by a man, or
you get in a car accident and then after, now I can't drive the car anymore
because it's fear, run amuck,
and the situation that we're in now,
we have this invisible virus, this invisible pathogen,
and you go out into the real world,
it's time to go back to work, take the precautions,
but if you let that fear seep into you and control you,
it's never gonna be back to normal,
like it was before.
It's gonna, and it's assuming you.
Yeah, all your interactions with other people,
I mean, it's gonna be affected by that rooted fear there,
where even just meeting people,
acknowledging greeting people,
all this stuff is going to change
if it's all based off of your sense of fear that you still carry with you versus giving
something to benefit of the doubt and really trying to immerse yourself again with other people.
I remember the story you told when you were a kid speaking in front of the classroom.
Yeah, that affected. That's the thing.
I could trace back all the way back to fourth grade, like it was yesterday because it was
such an impactful moment for me where I wasn't prepared and I was in front of my peers
and I was trying to speak on a subject I didn't really know anything about.
And all the insecurities, everything else started to flood in immediately.
And I didn't know if I could like get out.
I felt like almost a cluster of phobia in front of everybody to where I, I just stopped mid sentence.
I froze and then I, and then I walked off.
And then later on, everybody tried to console me like, Hey, it's fun.
But you know, just that moment, it, it stays in my psychology.
So then when I go into a group and I'm about to say something, it's that fear of this
might come up again.
This might always come in.
Did you avoid it afterwards?
100%.
I avoided any sort of situation where I had to present in front of class, in front of
my team, my peers, sports, events, things like that.
I'm just me doing myself,
me always doing myself and doing it the best I can do.
And so this is something I'm still working,
I'm still really trying to break this fear,
this deep rooted within me and face it.
And that's something that's a very big challenge of mine.
I think you've done a pretty good job actually.
Well, I like you using that example too,
because a lot of times our fear is insidious.
And it's something that is deeply rooted
in this insecurity that you've had since you were like a child
and you don't even realize it.
Yeah.
And I'll give you an off analogy
that has nothing really to do with health and fitness
or even like COVID right now,
but just how fear can creep in
and be this kind of forever driver
and until you learn to become self-aware about it
and then begin to unpack it,
do you ever get, move forward with it
or overcome it at all.
And for me, and I've shared on the podcast
before that a lot of my motivation,
there's nothing too, a lot of times that we justify fear
that were motivated, this motivated me.
Like when I was a young kid, there was situations
where we didn't pay our PG&E bill, so lights were out,
couldn't have the refrigerator running, we were living out of a cooler, evicted from houses,
stuff like that, right?
And as a young kid, what I thought was, or what I didn't connect as this childhood fear
that I had, it was, I don't want to be like mom and dad, and that's what motivates me
to be successful, and that was like this main driver for me.
But the truth is, I was fearful,
my fear as I got older was I don't want to be like that,
or I never want to be in that situation,
and so it would cause all these other behaviors that I do.
And sometimes that could be something like
I lost relationships.
I was so driven financially to be successful
and was so fearful of not having
or potentially being out on the streets
that I would just completely get tunnel vision,
ignore my partner because that's all
that matter to me was having it.
And the reality of it,
I mean, I've never had to want or need
since I've been a young adult.
Since I started working at 19 years old,
I've always had money, I've always had a savings,
I've always been okay.
But not in my head, in my head,
because it's so deeply rooted in this fear of not having
or being in that situation, my perspective, it's still to this day.
Even when Katrina and I have conversations,
the difference is that I'm aware of that fear now,
and I'm aware of how insidious it is
that when it rears its head in today's time for me,
and if I start to notice it cause an issue
and like a relationship like with Katrina and I,
and this is literally, this is a a true story literally fucking three days ago. You know Katrina sends me over, you know, the
bill that we have to pay the housekeeper. And obviously I'm in a place where I can afford
to have a housekeeper and do these things. I have a savings or invested. We run our business
very conservatively. And I like, you know, come on glue on her, because it's like $60
more than what it was like before or whatever, right? And I'm just like, you know,
why, why don't you stand there? Why didn't I'm like, you know, blaming her for not
telling me sooner? And she's like, you know that we have this, you're the one who
wants it. Why are you giving me such a hard time? And it's, and it, and I'm all heated
in the moment, and I'm pointing other things out that, well, you didn't tell me the week before and why is it this? Because it was this before the it and I'm all heated in the moment and I'm pointing other things out that well
you didn't tell me the week before and why is it this because it was this before the and I'm like
and then I had to catch my breath realize that it doesn't fucking matter if it's North or South
sixty dollars the other day I do want the help in the service we have the money and the savings
is not a big fucking deal whatsoever all that shit comes all the way back to my fears the kid
of not having
him being broke. And therefore I overreact on all these other things. And so it's crazy when
it's very easy when it's an obvious thing like COVID-19. You know, that's in front of all of us
right now. And you know, even the people that don't claim to be fearful, there's got to be some
part of you or you don't have a heart or compassion if you're not fearful for a loved one. Everybody's got an obese or a diabetic family member
or somebody in advanced age, who is a direct threat in risk, the high risk category for
this? And so you should have at least some sort of fear or compassion of them potentially
getting it, even if you don't think you think you are invincible. So these are obvious fears in front of us, but there's a lot of these things that are deeply rooted and cause our behaviors
and the way we rack today and learning to understand them and go through them is extremely important.
It's very important. And again, fear is essential. It's natural. A certain amount of it is healthy,
just like you said, Adam, if you had literally no fear,
be very dangerous world, that we would live in.
But it can definitely run amok.
It can cause some problems.
And I think now more than ever,
at least in my lifetime,
this is the risk that we have to kind of pay attention to because
kind of what's going on.
Now, fear does a few interesting things to your body.
Of course, it's now it's needed to help you prepare to react to danger.
That's why we have it in the first place.
The reason why you feel it in the first place is because it actually prepares you and your
body to deal with danger.
It actually sharpens certain functions
that help you survive like your eyesight.
Your eyesight actually sharpens when you're scared.
You're a migdel like it's activated
to focus on present danger and store it as a memory.
Okay, so this is good,
this is a good thing when it's beneficial to you. This is a bad
thing when it's not, because now why is it a good thing to focus on present danger and
store as a memory? Well, if I walk around that tree over there and there's a group of
guys that, you know, try to rob me.
Or ninjasuits.
Yeah, if you're weird. Yeah. They try to rob me. I ninjasuits. Yeah, that'd be weird.
To try to rob me, I'm gonna remember that corner.
I'm gonna remember that part of the neighborhood.
I'm not gonna go back there.
You know, go back thousands of years it was a lion.
I went around, oh, there's a group of lions over there.
I definitely remember the location.
We're not going over there anymore.
Veth, that's a very important thing.
But check this out, here's the opposite side of that.
It actually, chronic fear, and here's where the problem is,
okay, is chronic fear.
This is when it becomes an issue.
Chronic fear actually starts to damage parts
of the brain like the hippocampus,
and it impairs long-term memory.
So you remember fearful shit more,
and you forget everything else more.
Oh, man.
So over time, chronic fear actually starts to paint a scary world.
Dude, that's so important.
I'm gonna, I had to cut in and say something to you
because this was something that I, not that long ago,
had the subiphany of what you're exactly,
what you're explaining right now.
And maybe this will speak to somebody else
who has a similar experience.
And this has helped me with my relationship with my parents.
So I had a lot of animosity because of the shit that would happen as a kid, but part
of what I've recognized is I've gotten older and become more aware, and to the point
you're making right now, Sal, is that it's really shitty that this works this way.
But I know, you know, even though my memories
are have faded a lot since I was a kid,
I know every day it wasn't fucking turmoil and sad,
my fucking life wasn't that bad.
The shitty part is the way we're wired,
I remember all of that clear as fucking day.
I don't remember the Disneyland trip,
I don't remember the freaking time
we were all laughing as a family together.
I don't have those, those are not solidified in my brain.
All of the fucking bad shit is,
and all the stuff I was fearful of
or the moments I was scared in my life as a kid growing up.
And there was a lot of those, but I know there,
here's the thing, there was a lot of those,
but there were still a lot more good times.
But the shitty part is understanding the way the brain works
and knowing that my
brain did not wire, was not wired to hold on to all the good stuff, it was wired to remember
the scary shit and solidify that. And so it takes a lot of self-awareness as we age and get older
is to learn to detach and separate that and understand that fact that, oh wow, maybe a lot of this negative view I have about someone
or something or situations is my own perceived view of it because the way my brain operates
that it saves all that stuff like on the hard drive, bad, bad, bad, bad, but it really
wasn't that bad.
So that's something that you have to think about.
Yeah, you can see that too.
How, you know, we prop up a lot of entertainment, a lot of news, a lot of all these things that
are very much negative focus, like things that we're fearful of happening.
If it's happening on any part of the world, we want to know about it.
That's the most important thing is to avoid whatever is happening.
Way the hell somewhere else that I should not be concerning myself with right now, but that's been the pattern because it's so
much easier now with global access to information across the world for us to consume whatever
we can in terms of that type of information.
And this, unfortunately, just keeps, you know, perpetuating this vision of the world
being in turmoil and everything being negative
and that's what you're focused on.
You've folks say it on it.
Totally, literally what ends up happening
is it literally starts to,
because your perception is your reality.
Whatever you think reality is,
it's just how you perceive things.
So some people have a perception of reality
that is more positive, that is filled
with more gratitude, that is silver linings everywhere. My wife's Jessica is excellent at this.
She talks about growing up in her life and all that stuff. I know she had a hard life.
I know she wasn't growing, but she's very good at the silver linings. So she does a good
job of framing things
and so when she thinks of things and talks about them,
you know, I shake my hand, wow, you,
a lot of what you say and think is positive,
even though I know a lot of this other stuff happened.
So if you don't do that and you allow chronic fear
to take over, your perception starts to slowly change
and we know this, even physically with your brain
Hipocampus starts to shrink and make delas always activated
So now what ends up happening is you have a scary perception of the world
That's also confirmed by your memories. So now it's like a self-feeding
You know feedback loop and things feel worse and worse
This is why sometimes it could be so hard to get out of a fear loop.
It could be so hard to stop it
because it feeds itself continuously.
Fear slows down and changes digestion.
Now it does this because when there's a real present danger,
you want your digestion to stop for a second.
You want all the energy to go to your muscles
and your eyesight and your hearing, stop for a second. You want all the energy to go to your muscles and your eyesight and your hearing so you can escape.
But over time, chronic fear damages your digestion. Actually leads to IBS.
It can make you more susceptible to things like ulcers.
Chronic fear decreases fertility. Now, why would chronic fear decrease fertility? Well you think your body
thinks that's wise for you to produce a child in an environment that's scary. Doesn't have to be
scary by the way. Again, it's how you perceive it to be. So if you perceive it to be scary, your brain
and your body, it is scary. That's just that. So now we're going to decrease fertility.
Hormone starts to change, right? Tastostone levels actually drop in
men. Short-term fear can actually sometimes make it spike, but long-term chronic
fear makes it go down. You're now you're becoming weaker. Your body's actually
starting to become weaker. It accelerates aging. In extreme cases fear can
actually cause death and premature death. They know this for a fact.
And we know that through studies of people
who live a long time, that one of the reasons why
they could live a long time is that they don't have,
they don't suffer from, or at least I should say
they perceive things to be okay.
You don't have to be fake, but you don't have to perceive
things to be amazing, but they tend to perceive things to be okay. You don't have to be fake, but you don't have to perceive things to be amazing, but they
tend to perceive things as being okay and fine, rather than being super, super scary all
the time.
So, we know about all of this, right?
So, we know that chronic fear can cause problems, health problems.
We know that chronic fear can drive irrational behaviors.
We know that it can change our behaviors
with our partners and families.
It can change our, if we decide to open a business
or take our, you know, change our jobs.
I know people that are stuck in jobs that they hate,
but they're so scared of something different
that they stay and something that they know that they hate.
It can change your diet and what kind of foods you're driven to eat. Of course,
your body's looking for quick energy. Maybe you're looking for quick reprieves or you're more likely
to eat foods that are unhealthy. It drives things, it can drive things in a negative way,
knowing that and knowing the current situation, what do we do?
Well, there's things that you can do, for example, vein, voluntary,
arousing, negative experience, right?
These are examples of roller coasters, scary movies, going into a situation that you
know is dangerous or scary, but it's your
choice to head into that.
The build's confidence.
Yeah, you're exercising that muscle, that part of the exposure there, that part of the
body, how you react to it, how you handle it both mentally and physically.
And this connects to our mindset episode, this really connects to the story of sharing, you know, Jessica's childhood and my childhood, you know, part of what is,
I think, why I've had a lot of successes I've gotten older is because I thought I had,
I said, incredible training ground when I was younger. So, if I went through all this stress
and scary and sad stuff when I was younger, you start to exercise that.
And it becomes easier and easier every time you face that.
So then when you do get hit with something
that maybe everybody else thinks is,
oh my God, so scary, it doesn't even really crack that for you.
In fact, I said that on my questions the other day
when somebody was asking me about
how am I handling anxiety during this time,
during this time?
And I said honestly, when I use,
and I wouldn't quotations this time,
and I talk about it, a lot of it is coming
from a place of empathy for the,
I know a lot of people are.
I know a lot of people are having a really, really,
I've got family and people close to me that do have a lot of people are having a really, really, I've got family and people
close to me that do have a lot of anxiety that have lost jobs that are extremely stressed
out. But if I'm being completely honest, this doesn't even hit my top 100 of the most
scariest stressful times in my life. So I'm handling it like I would handle every single
day. Now, a part of that is the preparation, both physically, financially, mindset-wise,
that I have going into all this, I think. I think that has a lot to do with it. But a lot has to
do with the mindset too of being okay with exercising this, you know, finding your fears and facing
it and going through it. The more you do that, the better you will get at that
practice. Well, you know why that sounds, why there's something very positive about that, because I
know a lot of people, when things start to go back to normal, when it's time to go back to work,
it's time to, you know, start, you know, with precaution and all that stuff, people are gonna be very afraid of walking into the office
with 30 other co-workers.
And it's gonna suck, it's gonna really suck.
But what's comforting about what you're saying Adam is,
when you do it, the more you do it, the less it'll suck.
So be prepared for the fact that it's,
know that you're doing it voluntarily, go into it
and know that it's gonna get better.
But yeah, that is a training technique. It's to put yourself in scary situations that you're doing it voluntarily, go into it and know that it's going to get better. But yeah, that is a training technique.
It's to put yourself in scary situations that you can control and you get better at it.
And why I like, why I do like talking about this is because it bleeds into business,
it bleeds into fitness.
You know how many clients I had that when we first started to start their training and
I'd ask them, you know, why today,
why, you know, you're 40 something years old and you're finally getting started. A lot of the fear
was the fact that they would fail before. I didn't even want to start because I didn't know where
to start. Or that I would just gain it all back. I had tried a few times before and then so they
had already decided in their brain that, you know, they're going to fail or they would, they
fear of failing if they tried again. And the only reason why maybe they're going to fail or they would, they're a fear of failing
if they try it again.
And the only reason why maybe they're there today
is because their doctor said,
if you don't do it, you're gonna die.
And it's like almost scared them into that position.
And so again, motivated by fear
to come in to hire this personal trainer.
But I know there's a lot of people out there
that are like that, that are just afraid.
And that again, could be your fitness goals.
It could be a business or leaving a company
like you said, Sal, and going to do something else.
At the end of the day, if you don't practice that,
if you don't practice facing those fears and overcoming,
and becoming comfortable,
you said this in the mindset of,
so become comfortable with the worst outcome,
except the worst thing that could happen,
the absolute worst. And this is a thing that could happen. The absolute worst.
This is a tough exercise to do.
It is.
And make peace with it and then move forward from it.
Because any energy that you waste dwelling on the uncontrollable is waste of energy that
you could be using to move forward.
Totally.
I think you need to accept what you can't control.
So you do what you can and then leave the rest
to the fact that you can't control it.
Because I think what ends up happening is we think that if we worry about it,
it'll be better somehow.
If I keep worrying about this, it'll...
I won't forget.
Forget it.
I'm gonna solve something.
Yeah.
I mean, I think a lot of people can identify with trying to be a fixer.
I want to keep mulling this over in my mind,
so that way there's something that makes sense to me
that I have a plan of action or something I can do,
but these are things that are uncontrollable.
And there's many forms of that in life,
and the more that you can put your brain around the fact
that there are gonna be the unaccounted for
types of forces out there that are going to come and you're going to experience it.
And you have to make friends with the fact that they exist and that you can only control
what you can control and just know what those things are and stay there.
Well, there's also ways for you to train this, right?
So part of what makes this distress in the fear compound is that that fight or flight part
of your brain when it goes there.
It thinks you're in danger and so it goes to the flight or flight.
And then there's ways for you to learn to get out of that.
So you know, sexual activity, meditation, exercise, all these things are ways to move you out
of that part of your brain.
And so when you get into this situation, especially when it's uncontrollable like we're dealing
with right now, you know, instead of dwelling on it so much, take action by trying to do
some of these things that will pull you out of that flight or fight.
And the better you get at recognizing outside uncontrollable fear
and taking action quicker, and you get quicker and quicker
at that, the less fear you'll have.
Yeah, meditation's good because it helps stop the loop.
Because when you're in chronic fear mode,
it can- So does masturbation.
Massive.
Actually, that's- That's actually, you know,
it's funny.
It erupts way out.
They say that sexual activity is a great way to get out of fear mode.
The problem is getting aroused while scared for some people might not be possible.
It takes so long.
I mean, I can't be alone as a guy.
You're like, I'm so scared.
Take your pants off.
What the fuck?
Screw you.
I can't be alone as a guy who's ever, whoever couldn't sleep.
And it was in this head.
Well, when I think about like being in my head at night,
I can't sleep.
I know that some of that's rooted in anxiety.
I'm thinking about, oh, where's the business going to be tomorrow?
Oh, this employee.
And so there's, there's fear in anxiety.
I'm like, well, nothing gets to that better than master baiting.
You're saying that?
That just breaks that loop right away.
You know, fear right out of your head.
Right to sleep.
Well, I mean, it is true.
Connecting with people, physical activity.
Physical activity is a great one too.
Like hard physical activity can make you feel present.
Now, why is that beneficial?
By the way, you don't want to abuse that one,
but if you use it properly,
how does hard physical activity help with fear?
Okay, besides the physical health that you can get from it,
besides the fact that your muscles are gonna be stronger
and your leaner and your brain's working better from a physical standpoint, all of that stuff helps.
By the way, it makes you present. It makes you present. It's a splendid energy.
Right, it makes you, you're there. Like you're working hard. Yeah.
You are thinking about what you're doing right now. Yeah, yeah.
And what it does is it breaks the loop. So you're frozen with fear, you're stuck in this
fear loop. And sometimes all you need is enough reprieve
to be able to look at it.
But you can't look at it when you're in it.
So hard activity going on a hike,
doing a hard workout, putting on some music,
and getting a good lift in.
You're out of it long enough to where you broke the loop.
You're like, oh man, I feel so much better.
Now you can look at man, I was in a fear loop there.
And you can examine it.
Meditation does the same thing. Meditating is literally practicing, you know, for lack
of a better term, practicing just being present and it breaks that loop so you can move out
of it. It's crazy you say that because it's, and this is my experience. So I could be totally
off base with this, but in my experience, a lot of my friends that I know that are serious
like power lifters
Actually are internally tortured by other stuff and why I think they part of why I think
They love powerlifting so much because any power lifter will tell you this throw 600 pounds on your back
You can't it completely takes you out of everything else that's going on in the world and it puts you 100% focus
and what it takes to become a
600 pound squatter or deadlifter is an immense amount of training under load for a very long period of time
So a lot of times those guys and girls that I've met
They have got a lot of other outside stress and bullshit, but that's their church, their safe space,
that's their place where they have the most calm and focus
is under the most physical demand and stress.
It's pretty crazy.
I can identify with that on some level.
I think to like, you know, just getting out of your mind
and focusing on the body and like being in the body,
like it really helps to kind of close or shut down
that perpetual loop quite a bit.
And just expanding energy, it helps to kind of divert
a lot of that energy that's going into these thoughts,
which is, you know, it's super beneficial for me.
Like I need to expend energy constantly
to be able to keep my mind sharp.
Yeah, and the key is to understand this is,
you're not gonna like get rid of fear so that
you're all of a sudden a fear list that would make you not human.
It's that the fear doesn't control you in unhealthy and irrational ways and it's accepting
that you have some fear.
You know, when a firefighter runs into a burning building, do you think they don't have fear?
Of course they do.
It just doesn't control them. It doesn't stop them. They're disciplined enough to acknowledge the fear,
but to move forward anyway so that it doesn't influence their behavior so that they make
big mistakes. So one way you can reframe some of this is to think of yourself as a hero.
Well, when things open back up and it's time to go back to work, you are doing the world.
You're doing your country and the world a good thing by getting yourself out there, risking
yourself so that things can move forward again. You take the precautions, you wash your hands,
be careful who you're around, all that stuff, but you move forward anyway. And sometimes, years ago, I was gonna do a talk
in front of a very, very large group.
And talking in front of people,
not really an issue for me normally.
I'll get the normal amount of nervousness,
but not a big deal.
But this was a group of people that were above me
in position.
They were all people I looked up to.
There was a lot of them.
I was gonna go out there, I was gonna do my thing,
and I started to get real nervous.
And I remember, I think the manager I worked under
recognized that I was a little nervous.
And he told me, he says,
Sal, I need you to go out there
and I need you to get these people
to feel passionate and motivation like you feel.
And all he did was make me feel like the hero.
Still scared, but now I felt like I had to do this for other people.
I was up there.
Fear is still there, but now I'm moving forward.
This is just one way you can reframe,
just like the cave story.
You know, I think about that because I think to myself,
because believe me, listen, this is hitting me
right in my, my fear spot.
There's certain things for me that are very difficult
to deal with and I'm a bit of a germaphob anyway.
So this is like a worst case scenario for someone like me.
And I think about this cave scenario
because when I think about doing things for my family,
no amount of fear will stop me.
Still feel it, it's not gonna stop me.
In fact, it feels empowering.
And that's back to the control thing
that I think you were talking about.
So reframing the situation.
But when things change, when
what's time for us to step out into the world again, take your precautions, but also be rational,
don't let the fear control you. And what you may need to do is you may need to incorporate
more practices to help solve this for you. You may need to develop a meditation or prayer practice. Maybe you don't have one now, but now you might need one.
You might need to practice things like gratitude.
Gratitude is a great way to offset fear when you're scared to consciously think about things
that you're grateful for.
Exercise is more important now than it was when you wanted to lose 15 pounds.
I'm just going to tell you that right now.
It's nice that you want to burn body fat and you want to build muscle and you want to
look great.
That's all great.
But if you're feeling controlled by your fear or you're afraid of getting back into
the world, exercise is a much more important role for you.
It's not fat burning, it's not building muscle, it's helping you deal with your fear,
helping you control it rather than it control you.
And with that, go to mindpumpfree.com and download all of our guides and resources.
You can also find the three of us on Instagram.
You can find Justin at Mind Pump Justin.
You can find me at Mind Pump Sal and Adam at Mind Pump Adam.
Thank you for listening to Mind Pump.
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