Mind Pump: Raw Fitness Truth - 134: The Voice of Guod
Episode Date: August 20, 2015Off the wall and totally random. There is no other way to describe this episode and it is Doug's job, as the producer and official cat herder, to make sense of it. In the meantime Sal, Adam & Justin a...re in the process of setting him up with online dates. Welcome to total chaos.
Transcript
Discussion (0)
So we have to redo this commercial because we try to commit Doug to doing something that he wasn't ready for us to do because we actually have other things.
You know, he's used to bending over backwards for us, but not like this.
Now we're having him bend over forward.
So this is like going back to like how he's the manager and you get the spots behind the scenes.
Like we totally just we wasted our time right now on a commercial that we can't even possibly run because Doug pulled the plug on that.
So this is what we're going to do. We're going to put you on the spot again.
Sorry. Okay, so no, no, we want gonna do. We're gonna put you on the spot again. Sorry.
Okay, so no, we wanna do a commercial
because our bundle is available still.
And it's a huge value.
Like 41% off.
41% off, it's still available.
What do they get in there?
They get the MAP Santa Ballet Program,
which is a full body workout program,
build muscle, burn body fat.
It's phased in the three different phases.
You get the patented trigger session system in there.
Then you get the no BS6 pack formula,
which is a workout specifically designed for your core.
You get the fasting guide, breaks down,
how to do fasting the right way.
Burn body fat, build muscle.
You hear about it all over the place right now.
We break it down for you and tell you how to do it
the right way.
Before that, you read the Nutrition Survival Guide.
Nutrition Survival Guide is in there also.
It breaks down your macronutrients for you, tells you how many calories you should
consume. It's great on an individual basis. You get in there, you plug in your numbers,
and it's individualized for you. All of that is available right now at a massive discount.
MindPumpRadio.com. Click on the yellow button. If you wanna pump your body and expand your mind,
there's only one place to go.
Might, might, up with your hosts.
Salta Stefano, Adam Schaefer, and Justin Andrews.
What do you wanna say, that what are we doing here?
One of the things is I think we gotta remember
that we have new listeners coming on all the time.
And this is just my hallucination,
is that sometimes we get a little obscure
at the beginning.
Oh, you think people don't like that?
No, they come in, they don't really know what it's about.
No, no, what I'm saying is,
I want clarity at the beginning of the shows.
It's like, hey, welcome to Mind Pump.
Welcome to Mind Pump.
The first 10 to 15 minutes, we're gonna be bullshitting.
I think we're not saying,
you should definitely remind them of what we are.
What we are, yeah, That's my point is,
but I don't feel like it'd be effective
if we did that every show,
because it would sound like a formulaic show
that's true.
That's true.
So I think intermittently, we definitely need to do that.
I think, yeah, I think intermittently
is the answer to that,
because I really like the rawness,
the real feeling of we just literally turn the mics on
and we go, you know, which a lot of times,
it's us catching up and talking with each other because we haven't talked a long time. Yeah, and maybe the more serious ones
Yeah, I'm not like so we like we alternate with the the serious ones
We'll we'll address the fact of what we are. These are my hallucinations
So you can either accept or reject it. Well, maybe maybe maybe this we are accepting it and we're talking about it
We're accept we're taking it in. Yeah, we're doing his this. We're accepting it and we're talking about it.
We're accepting it and we're doing it.
We're changing it to something completely different, but we're taking it and changing it.
We're interpreting it.
It's just like the written law.
Why don't we do this?
We should change Doug's job instead of the producer.
The name of the job is cat hurt her.
Because he was trying to hurt us.
Kitten whisper.
That's not happening.
Oh, first of all, we need to look into those hallucinogens.
First of all, secondly, why don't we, I want to see Eagles.
Well, why wouldn't we do this?
Caca.
Why wouldn't we always do like pretty much what we do all the time,
which is lighted up and record.
But then you as the producer, like if you don't think it was really good
information or funny or say if you weren't entertained by it or you don't feel
like you got something out of it, maybe you those ones you just cut and you just
start to go. Oh yeah, I've cut some stuff. You have. Oh, I have. I've noticed.
I've noticed my my time has been down by like 45.
He's a person. He doesn't he doesn't cut out my nuts. He doesn't comment. He doesn't
cut me. Yeah doesn't cut me.
Yeah, he did.
In fact, the last two episodes, I don't think I heard myself one time.
Yeah.
I think you cut Michael I and Tom to completely know what.
That's fucking bullshit.
We have to cut out the fact.
Well, sometimes the mic goes on mid conversation and then if they come in at that point,
they're going to be so lost, right?
Yeah, right.
And so I have to make a executive decision, if you will.
Do you think?
Yeah, I don't know.
I guess, from my understanding with a lot of people
at its start, like, they might start with one episode
but then like, oh shit, we gotta start from the beginning.
Because we're kind of like a timeline.
Yeah, can I tell you guys something?
So when I was up in Tahoe, of course,
we listened to you guys.
But then I also, what did you think? We would do. Yeah, what I tell you guys something? So when I was up in Tahoe, of course, we listened to you guys. But then I also, what did you think?
What did you think?
What did you think?
What did you think?
Just in case we end up airing this, we need to be clear.
We haven't recorded, all of us haven't recorded together
for like two weeks.
Yeah, yeah, which is, that's, we're never gonna do that again.
Oh no, kill.
I'm never gonna do that again.
No, no, I can't.
That was horrible.
I'll tell you.
And in two weeks, this is what's happened.
Adam has grown a full beard.
A full beard.
Yeah.
I have a little bit more gray hairs.
Doug seems to look more muscular and and Justin looks leaner.
This is all in the two.
A little bit in my balls or flake.
You're that's how gangster we are.
We just get after you right there flakey balls.
This is new.
Like you kept in.
Captain Chris.
I I I
I deeply deeply missed you guys this this last it's been even though it's only been five days
I've gone we we missed those other those other ones because you didn't make it so man
That was that was a long time to not be on this I didn't realize how therapeutic this is for me
I know we've mentioned it and I know we've talked about it but it's strange isn't it? Oh, can I just tell you to like listen to Sal Rambo his bullshit and not be able to fucking interject and say something?
Oh, me crazy. I'm like listening. I'm like I'm gonna call him right now
Almost call him. Here's my thoughts. Yeah, no bullshit, bro. Listen you're on your city not to get it from this perspective
You know, oh, I wanted to say was that it was that? That was the most unique one. We were talking about the wrist wrist wrist.
Of course, of course.
Yeah, that's it.
I knew, I felt you.
You were talking about that.
I was like, oh, I got, I got a clue.
Adam, I know.
Somehow.
And you even tried it then, Sal, still shut it down.
You were just like, so you know, I'm trying to think
of this like Adam would.
Yeah.
Yeah, I know.
So I get why you.
That's not talking about that.
And then Sal was like, no. no, he didn't earn it.
And then I'm like, I totally agree. And then just until he came, I'm like, great job being me,
right? I mean, it was a facade to begin with. You stood up for me for like one minute and then
Sal told you, no, we're not going to go. And then you came right away. That's all I got.
You gave right away. Yeah, that's what I got.
Sorry.
No, it was, I definitely missed you guys.
I did realize too that, so I went back,
we decided I'd told Katrina,
I'm like, let's listen to some of our favorite ones, right?
Like, I think of like one of the first like 30 episodes
and what Marmos downloaded one,
so I was clicking on some of those.
And I, you know, we've evolved for sure.
Oh, yeah.
And you know, I think aside from me being sober now
on the show, I think I could totally tell there too.
I remember originally it was like, you know,
smoking to kind of settle us down and get into our groove
and I think it definitely helped.
For me, it was drinking.
I like how you just suddenly included everybody.
Yeah, that was the collective one.
Thanks, bro.
Yeah, well, no, I had to drag you guys to the mud too.
So as I was, I did all by yourself.
I did.
I did, I did realize the difference, you know, in the flow of things, I felt like, I don't know,
I didn't like listening to myself back then,
as much as I thought it would be enjoyable.
I was over.
I was like, who is this asshole?
Oh God, I was super fumbling around for words.
Oh, super critical.
I guess maybe that's what the biggest part of the,
I guess, evolution of the show now listening back
Maybe just how comfortable we are right? I think they're probably a lot going through our heads when we first fired up
That we needed to give this information. We needed to make sure we did this. I think we thought about where now it's like yeah
You know, we have more of a problem shutting down so we don't ramble for too long or go off on a subject for too long or whatever
So it's natural it feels whatever. It's natural.
It feels good.
It's easy.
Much better.
But we do kind of tell a story in there.
So I do know a lot of people when they when they first start listening to Mind Pump, I've
actually just heard this other day was someone was, oh, you got to listen to Mind Pump.
Start at the beginning though.
Start at the beginning and just go all the way through and then they inbox me.
I get this message like, oh my God, I was just introduced.
I just got this yesterday.
I just got introduced to my pump
and I listened to 40 episodes in a row.
They're like, you guys are.
Well, that's 20 hours.
I know, right?
That's crazy.
That's gnarly.
So, you know, some of these people will just literally,
Mike, Mike, and it's always funny to me too.
What I'm realizing now, I don't know if you guys noticed this,
it's the people that are closest to us
that are really like putting, which is ironic, right?
You would think that you, you're my family,
you're my friend, you've known me for a long time.
I mean, if you had this cool radio show
that supposedly was doing so well,
I'd want to tune in, listen, even if it wasn't doing well,
just to hear my boy or my cousin or my uncle
or whatever, someone who's related to me
or that close to me, I'd want to hear.
You know what I'm saying? They are the last ones, they've been the last one. And so it's related to me or that close to me, I'd want to hear. You know, we're the last ones.
They are the last ones.
They've been the last one.
And so it's funny because now I'm starting to see that happen and then they reach out
to me and like, dude, I just listened to 110 episodes.
Like, I'm almost caught all the way up and I'm like, holy shit, dude.
They're like, like, these are really good.
I'm like, yeah, no fucking shit, bro.
I've been trying to tell you that for like the last, you know, seven months.
Why don't you do this?
Yeah, you will like it.
And it's not so. And I think that sounds arrogant to say that.
It's the, and because whenever I say,
I don't know, you don't send that again.
Whatever it is.
I don't mean it in like, I guess I think even though
I guess some people refer to us as entertainment
and then we've been told where the Howard Stern
of fitness, I see it says good information. I always I always feel
like we give something that's, you know, even if it's not fitness
related, we try to give some good topics that we and we all
note this is inscripted. We all disagree a lot of the time
and stuff like that. But everyone has an educated opinion. And
and I feel like we express that really well on show. So it's a
good, it's good for people. And a lot of times it's questions
that people have already asked me. So I love to be like, have you
listened to episode 62? You know, I have you listened to episode 43, like going listen
to mind pump. That's why we do this. We did this so we could help people like yourself
who have these. And along the way, maybe entertain you a little bit. So you don't fucking
fall asleep listening to boring ass information. So, you know, hey, check it out. And it's
like the family and friends and the close people are just now like putting it together after you've been telling naked news, man
Yeah, it's a naked news. Yeah, it was it was it wasn't very fun not being around with you guys. No for two weeks
Yeah, I felt dysfunctional. Yeah kind of vibe. It was yeah, I mean, you know my episode you know
episodes that word Adam wasn't here. They were okay
They were great the first I really enjoyed the ones that I wasn't here was boring fuck
The one that I wasn't here was never never
Always I win mr. Responsive look Doug. Yeah, you guys are you guys have not missed at all no, and you know what we will at some point
I think feel like we cut dug off was there more
at all. No, and you know what we will at some point. I think we like we cut dug off. Was there more and more stuff we totally did this is this this is the gist of it, dude. Yeah, as we just go.
Exactly. All right, Doug. It's a stop. All right. So what were you saying again? Oh, we got to give
him a direction in the beginning. Yeah. Yeah. I feel like they just cut that right. Yeah.
Like, let's say you wanted to you wanted to play this. You could say it was good information.
And there are people who enjoy to hear this. We'll put it in there. If you're like, yeah,
I didn't like it, you just don't play it.
Yeah, I just don't play it.
I mean, I have the power ultimately.
Yes.
Wow.
We know this.
You know, it feels good.
Wow.
Are you sure isn't Doug like God?
Yeah, I just got this.
Exactly.
I knew it.
Spell my name backwards.
Go on.
Oh my God.
That was a stoner moment.
That was a total stoner moment.
That was. Bro, did you know to a total stoner moment. That was.
Bro, did you know toasters are like tangy for bread?
So what else? What else? What else? That was quick as I've never heard that before.
Yeah, I love that. That was the first. Did you just make that upper jersey here?
No, I think I read that somewhere. Oh my gosh.
That's great though. I appreciate that. I love hearing like a new new shit like that.
You know that that deserves one of those memes with like
He and your Reeves where it's used like that
Have you seen the stoner stoner goat? It's like a goat and it's his face looks like he looks like he's baked
And then there'll be memes underneath it's like one of one one of my favorite ones, every time I eat grass and giving the world a haircut,
it's got to like just stone face.
Kills me.
All right, Doug.
Man, stop.
Stop.
What else we need to do, Doug?
Yeah, let me start something else that you can interrupt.
Okay.
Yeah.
Well, let's you get through a sentence this time.
Well, whenever you want to start with,
start telling us some important stuff.
They've got to go on.
Well, see, I think the listeners have to understand that, you know, we're all entrepreneurs.
We don't really like organizational a whole lot.
And for what?
And for this reason, sometimes we're not the most organized group of people.
You see what he's doing.
He's doing exactly what I was doing.
See how he's bringing all of us as that, even though he's really talking to Sal and
I right now
What all the rest you motherfuckers don't know is he's he's talking to Sal and I right now and but he's trying to make us feel better
By say it's all of us need to get better at this. I've never been accused of being
Keep it real here. We keep it here. We'll just tell you what scale from one to sell
Some of the highest sales lazy as flood never does
It's not lazy.
It's called shooting from the hip.
Shooting from the hip.
Shooting from the hip.
I'm a hip slayer of the hip.
And there's a lot of value to shooting from the hip, of course.
That's why this shows so spontaneous.
It's all the shooting from the hip.
However, from the standpoint of building a business
and a brand, sometimes we need to kind of, you know,
rein it in a little bit and get focused.
I'm there. In other words, if it wasn't for Doug, we could make any of, you know, rein it in a little bit and get focused.
In other words, if it wasn't for Doug,
we could make any money probably.
No.
So what should we be focusing on?
We're really good at podcasting.
Well, one of the things I did was look at, you know,
what's our demographic?
Who are the people listening to this show?
Well, good looking people.
Definitely good looking.
Pot intelligence.
All that for sure.
Mostly muscular.
Yeah, that's a key point there, mostly muscular, right?
These are people who are interested in health and fitness.
And if we look at it,
there's some people that don't work at it all, listen to it.
That's true, but they're the minority.
I would think, they listen to me.
Yeah, they do.
But if we look at all the iTunes reviews,
if you look at all the conversations on the forum
and everything, it's people who are into health and fitness.
And I think there's a lot of value
and having a lot of variety this show,
but we always have to keep it focused on our core audience,
which is-
So just saying it's more fitness-
So just saying it's more fitness-
So just saying it's more fitness-
So just saying it's more fitness-
So just saying it's more fitness-
So just saying it's more fitness-
So just saying it's more fitness-
So just saying it's more fitness-
So just saying it's more fitness- So just saying it's more fitness- So just saying it's more fitness- So just saying it's more fitness- So just saying it's more fitness- So just saying it's more fitness- episodes because the last the last four we heard it. Nishin. Actually, the last couple were fitness in your mind.
Like the four before that were just random.
Yeah, it was a pretty random show for sure.
Yeah.
Over the off.
I didn't even notice.
Oh, it's like four of them.
And those are the ones we love the most though.
I know.
That's what that's what we text each other.
Oh, last night's episode was brilliant.
You know why?
Because we don't want it.
We love talking about shit.
We're not experts in I think.
Wait a minute. There's more debate. That's why I don't know. I want to, we love talking about shit. We're not experts in it. I think. Wait a minute.
There's more debate.
That's why.
I don't know.
I feel like I'm an expert about everything.
It's a debate.
I just feel that way.
That's why it's so fun.
Yeah.
All right.
What else, Doug?
You know, it's pretty much it for the moment.
Okay.
So just stay focused.
You know what I, stay focused a little bit.
Yeah.
This is about guys, and I, I could tell you exactly what this is about what is it Doug's avoiding his whole date
My date yeah, he's trying to he's trying to divert us. Oh, no guys. Oh, yeah
Either one of you guys get on there and look no, you looked right you said the picture. Okay, so listen up
Did you see the eight eyes? Yeah, yes, yeah guess what, you know, whose job is it to get her
over my direction?
Don't trip, we got that cover.
Don't even look.
I'm your wingman, Doug.
Don't even worry, bro.
So here's what I did, okay?
I went to the match.com and I finished the profile
and then it's up to you guys.
Okay, yep.
It's up to you guys to set up the meeting.
The guys, Doug has just handed his dick over to us.
He just placed it.
I've already been playing with it.
All right.
I got online.
I got online.
You like how I did there.
You're dick is on a little word play there for you.
I got online and already started digging around on that thing, man.
It's digging around, digging around, playing with it.
Yeah.
Figured it out.
Wow.
You've got to figure it out. Okay. I, playing with it. Yeah, I figured it out. Wow. You've got to figure it out.
Okay, good.
Yeah, you guys need to get on there and check it out.
It's pretty cool.
It's pretty simple too.
I already liked a few.
They'll be getting email soon.
So you've gotten any comments?
I haven't been back on there.
I feel like we should throw in a couple random ones though.
Just for entertainment purposes.
Well, I think that's going to automatically happen. Yeah, I think
I think you have no choice on match. I think yeah, I think it just kind of happens naturally.
That's the beautiful part. I don't think we're going to need a stage any at least we pure reality.
So we decided on a coffee shop is like the first location. Oh absolutely. Look at those
Asian coffee shops that we have over here. That would be great, dude. You should take us over.
We're all crazy like that.
I think one of those Asian coffee shops.
Let's just get this out of the way.
I don't like to miss that stuff.
Yeah.
So if you guys are not, okay, if you're a listener, I should probably explain what that is,
so that joke even makes sense to you.
In the Bay Area, we allow these coffee shops that are very cool. They serve very cool. Yeah, it's
kind of like some cream. It's kind of like Starbucks meets centerfolds. So if you can envision
that, it's kind of like that. Kind of like Starbucks meets centerfolds. I haven't been
in one yet. So it's just chicks. Of course you guys have it. Of course you guys have.
It's chicks walking around a lot of times. Either of I actually I'm just telling whatever
I'm so you go into these things and you know they it's it's not quite as
Because they wouldn't be able to stay open if you know, they did you know a lot of crazy stuff
But they're very friendly there and they work for tips and
The girls that serve the coffee are beautiful. Are they in like lingerie and shit?
Is that what they do?
They start off in less like kind of hooterish type
of outfits, you know, a lot less skin going on.
Start off?
Well, yeah.
So it progresses.
It does progress.
You know, it's funny.
The more cups of coffee you drink and the more tips
you give, the less clothing they would.
Once you get the shakes, it's over, man.
The scientists and me think that's such a bad combination.
Caffeines of astro constrictor can't really get a good boner.
Might get diarrhea, not really good idea.
Alcohol is better, I think.
Coffee makes you shit.
And I just ruined it for everybody right now.
I think there's 30 or last time I checked 30 or 40 these things.
Last time I checked, I've been to 30
30 or 40 these and just in San Jose alone. That's a lot do you know there's that much I've never even heard of it
So that's what we're said your first date. Oh, yeah, oh totally
What's actually very neat about it? Why I think we should do that is because you could go there and it'd be totally normal too
It wouldn't it's not like it's not like at a strip club where if
you're sitting in a table, you have to be handing some girl ones or tipping some of
your asking for the special coffee, you can go there and have normal coffee and just have
it. And if the dates are disaster, he gets exactly what I'm thinking about.
Flamie. Yeah. Exactly what I'm thinking about. And it'll test her character. We'll see
what kind of chicken. Now, now if you walk in, this is Adam's approach, right? If I say that we give Adam his,
maybe we should, maybe each of us
should play his individual plan.
I got an idea.
Why don't each of us play the date?
Take a girl and a date and see who does better.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I like that idea.
Now, because that's almost like,
say, oh, you're talking about you and your girl,
like, you know, you guys both had that first date.
Yeah, sounds very similar.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
No, that's how I would do that.
So I think I'll do that.
I'll be like an alternate approach.
And now that I share what I'm gonna do,
I guess I should go first since this we know that.
But you gotta play the rules, bro.
What?
Play by the rules.
Don't be like getting paid a hooker
and tell us to stand like your date.
That's like a dough. That's not gonna last, right? Yeah, but then you're not a money. He doesn't
care. He's just gonna be like, I won, guys, I got I don't want no, we got to be legit.
I think that's still legit. I don't see why that's not fair. I'm gonna show up on
the false for a day. I'm gonna show up on his ski mask and pretend to like assault him,
have him kick my ass in front of his date.
And then she's gonna be like, oh my god.
This is the way I look at it.
If you kick that guy here, she's so much bigger than you.
And you fucked him up.
You know what?
If you went through all that to do that and it worked,
I think you deserved it.
Yeah, bro.
It's fair enough.
If I actually want to go spend a thousand dollars on
private and chick to get naked and take Doug home from his date. I probably deserve to win, right?
Just make sure that date is a really good one.
Yeah, I got you. Don't blow it on, you know, kind of, you know, yeah,
no, I got you. I was always a back alley. What pictures do we use for
you? Have we used any? Oh, no, I put pictures up. Oh, you I did my job. Okay just no I put pictures up. Oh you I did my job
Okay, did you put up the picture of you doing the curls?
And I don't have that picture. Oh
That's like a fuck. Okay, I'll put the picture up. Okay. That's a must
My tongue sticking out I'm gonna know the good have you learned nobody cares about your tongue
They want to see your fucking abs, bro
Chicks want to see
I get a whole new demograph for sure about your tongue. They want to see your fucking abs, bro. Yeah. All right. Chicks want to see abs. Yeah. All right. Yeah.
I'm showing up.
Yeah. I get a whole new demograph for sure.
Yeah.
That would be the only picture.
No.
I have.
Of course.
That should be your front picture.
Yeah.
Yes.
For sure.
I didn't even show my face just like that.
Cause you know why?
Let's be honest, dude.
Let's be honest.
If you're clicking through and you're serving
that even myself, I just went through it.
Stick out.
Well, no.
Right now, I just see your age. But if I see that, I see abs before I see numbers. If I saw abs, it'd be like, I just went through it. It's stick out. Well, no, right now, I just see your age,
but if I see that, I see abs before I see numbers.
If I saw abs, I'd be like, I'd look at them,
holy shit, that dude, that dude's 49, he looks like that.
Holy shit.
Versus, if I don't, I see a normal picture shirt,
like shirt on, sharp, good looking dude,
and then I see four, he's kinda old, just keep going.
He's probably like every other old guy, you know?
But dude, you're like, you you know, but dude, you're like
Superhuman. Yeah, you like super. We should also post pictures of him like doing activities like a
Fishing or no something cool. We got a thing something. Hey, are we gonna start an episode building something? Oh, this is an episode by the way
I thought we did this is an episode. This is my update on on the match.com. Why not? Oh, this is how we spun it.
I like it.
Yeah, I mean, we had to spin it in some direction.
You are the spinner.
Let the spinners go.
Laving up to my name.
Spinning.
Bingbing.
OK, so this is how OK.
So pictures of activities or even hanging out with us.
And we're just like, yeah, like you're the cool guy.
Yeah, I have a one picture from the show.
The one of the four of us, right?
Oh, it's a good looking picture.
Perfect. I'm a little dark, but I think that's a pretty good picture of all of us.
What's wrong with dark? You can't really see my face.
We gotta go to the club and take some pictures and be like, you know, he hangs out with
hot guys everywhere, everywhere he goes.
Oh, we all look pretty sharp in that out. We have a couple of you that went into the
show and then we also went to the winetons. Yeah, that all look pretty sharp in that out you have couple yet that when we went to the show and then we also went to
The wind at times. Yeah
Oh, yeah, we have some pictures of that
You put those two pictures up plus the ab shut girls gonna be like he's rip. It's a done deal He's good looking. He's looks way younger than his age any hangs out with other hot younger looking dudes
Yeah, she's right away close. Close. Yeah.
And then we gotta do a picture of you, like,
I don't know, hanging out with a bunch of girls
that are like your friends, like they're all like,
oh my God, he's the coolest guy ever.
Like we loved her.
Women loved her.
I hate that I'm married.
Instantly.
Exactly.
And then instantly they're gonna see that picture
and be like something about him.
Yeah.
It's awesome that all these women want.
And then we do want to keep him around as a friend,
but that's really plan B.
And then this is failing, I'm going to duck.
We want to do a picture too, I think that,
because we don't want, you know,
I want a good girl too, that's like fun and open minded.
So you get to do like some off the wall,
like grabbing your ankles and looking back at the camera
between your legs with like a, like with a clown hat on
or something. That's a money shot for sure.
Yeah, just something like just like,
like make you go like, what the fuck is that?
You know what's interesting?
You know what's weird?
I gotta email this guy.
Let me tell you what's weird about the show.
I feel like Adam was in my mind right there.
I feel like he went in my brain and just read it.
Wizard.
Read exactly what I was thinking.
Like the clown hat bending over, grabbing ankles,
right in my head.
Wow.
That's a fuck. That would totally
have an image. That would totally work. Tell me you're not gonna get some emails with that picture,
dude. You're gonna get some emails. Yeah, that'll get you no emails or you could take a picture
with like five cats. That'll get you no fucking. I love cats. This is fluffy. Yeah. Oh, I have to say after we do this it would be fun to do
Hey after we do it would be fun to do a fake profile. Oh do the have like the one where you have I will pay the bus
Like you get the portrait like side profile then you got the one huge in the back. Okay, well, I had to tell you guys
I got okay, and this is what a bird my best birds are fucking creepy
We my right
Bird's are creepy. Yeah, I'm like talking you guys also and I get this
Only people only people that should have a bird are pirates. Yeah, everybody else if you have a bird on your shoulder
It's weird. Yeah, you're an asshole. Hey, so we made a batch.com that was kind of like a funny one like that for my good buddy,
right? And we, we, his profile picture, we had imposed, we had him get down in his like
boxer briefs and then he held the guitar. So he was playing it naked. That was his profile
picture. Oh, dude, it was so great. It was so great.
We only kept it up, we only kept it up for like a month
because I told him, I'm like, dude, you gotta let me,
he was single the time.
I'm like, let's create this and we ended up,
I remember we were drinking this of that.
We're probably like 26 years older or something.
So my boy Justin, he'll love here in Ayr and me
to share this story because it was pretty fucking,
it was great that he was open-minded enough to do that
and have some fun because it totally made fun of himself.
But he did like these little small little times
where he'd seen a couple of lines and play it.
Like we created this whole thing.
He got all kinds of random people.
It was for me.
Oh yeah, for sure.
But I try to get him to the next level,
which is go out on a date with him.
He was like, no, dude, there's no way.
We wanted to get in there and just kind of see what's happened.
He was even me.
We're girls who are out there and search in through pages and stuff.
And this was way back.
I don't even remember when match.com first started, but I know it hadn't been around that
long when we did it.
That's why I thought it was funny because it was like that was when it first back then
it was more something that people made fun of and hardly anybody did it where now they
would say like three out of four relationships are met.
Me online.
Yeah, it's like, now it's weird.
It's weird if you tell somebody like,
oh yeah, I met my wife, I met my girlfriend in person actually.
Yeah.
They like Matt.
Yeah.
And then we were like, I like you.
I like you.
Right.
And then I looked at their Facebook.
I know.
I realized how cool they were.
We should do pictures of you like doing weird shit
and making like outlandish claims.
For example, like in front of a telescope
And would be like, you know in my spare time. I've discovered 15 planet, you know just a weird, but it's true course
That's what you would just you know weird shit, you know, I mean or like you know like you're like you have a sword and you're like a
Like a night outfit and you'd be like oh in my spare time. I like to fight you know kill dragons
What's that what is I like that? That's a real what's it called?
Larpe no. Oh, yeah, larping is it larping? Yeah, yeah, is that where they they
They read how do you know that? I know that it's right is it like people? Yeah, I think it's thunder
Fucking throw it at the guy. I think it's larp. It's where it is larpy live action roleplay. Oh, whoa
I just nerdy nerd in myself. How did myself say what's it?
What's it called you large wife? I'm alive. I'm action roleplay.
Larpe. At least that's what they call that it band camp. Wow. That would be another awesome date.
Yeah, say that. Yeah. That's the final day. I think I see yeah, she like you should get a real cerebral
chick for him and then we can kind of compare the two, you know,
with Adam's girl.
Hey, so here's here's what we might have to do.
You know what would be you know,
serious, I have a very, very serious on how we structure this.
I was actually really thinking this the day is that.
All right, let's get serious.
If if we go let's let's say we each plan a date frame, right?
Yeah.
I think that if we do that, we won,
we need to do them kind of close together.
And I don't think we want to air episodes after each time,
we send them on a date because what could happen is work
and get around that these guys are recording and doing
this thing and it might detour women from wanting to, and we don't want that to happen. We don't want people to
tour from because they're worried they're gonna get talked about on my impump or like that
and they're like, oh, they're just setting us. You know, what we don't want. We want it
to end up being like real as we can possibly can. So maybe airing them all after we've done
it. You know, like we've done, you know, however many things.
Well, I think if he finds one that he really likes, then we can talk to him about all the
other ones. Okay. You know what I'm saying?
So we'll do it like Bachelor,
or we would forget of a rose.
Or he could just go on a date with all three
at the same time.
We could do it like, hey, listen girls,
I don't have a lot of time on my hands,
so I'm trying to, you know, I wanna,
I wanna just consolidate.
Yes, consolidate.
And then as the date goes on,
I will be sending one of you home after a couple of hours.
I'll have roses with me.
If you can close that, we could close that.
That would be the shit.
You know what, the girl, you know, it's funny.
I'm picturing the girls that each one of us would send
to date them, and they would look so different
from each other.
I know.
You know what I'm saying?
They'd be so different.
I'm sure they would be actually.
Adam's girl would show up and just be just too mongous.
Oh, she's gonna be hot dog
Don't worry. I'm wearing all lips and I can probably just I might not find your future wife, but
You're gonna have a good time. There's a good chance your date with my girl could possibly work at the place
You guys go have coffee
All right, and she's like oh my god, this is my favorite place.
Yeah, let's do this.
I'm down.
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