Miss Me? - Listen Bitch! Boys to Men
Episode Date: March 18, 2024Welcome to the first edition of 'Listen Bitch'! Every Monday, Lily and Miquita answer your questions on a special subject. On the agenda this week it's, BOYS FROM THE 1990s.Which 90s boys would they s...nog, marry and avoid? Miquita spills the beans on T4 presenter Steve Jones' fling with Pamela Anderson, and Lily explains why 90s boys in citrus Ben Shermans are SO FIT.Next week, we want to hear your questions about LYING. If you have something you want to ask the girls, email it to missme@bbc.co.uk or send us a message on WhatsApp: 0800 0304 090. And remember, we LOVE hearing your voice notes.This episode contains strong language and adult themes.Credits:Producer: Matt Thomas Technical Producer: Will Gibson Smith Production Coordinator: Hannah Bennett Executive Producers: Dino Sofos and Ellie Clifford Assistant Commissioner for BBC: Lorraine Okuefuna Commissioning Editor for BBC: Dylan HaskinsMiss Me? is a Persephonica production for BBC Sounds
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A gentle warning.
Miss Me contains very strong language and adult themes.
Welcome to Listen Bitch.
Listen bitch.
Listen bitch.
Listen bitch.
Listen bitch. It's not like you're saying, we don't say listen bitch, which is the name of this episode of Miss Me.
We don't say listen bitch to actually say like, will you listen to this thing I have to say.
It's usually like hello.
It's a version
of hello listen bitch yeah listen bitch hang on careful you might sing a melody that we don't
have rights for i'm not gonna sing a melody i just cut it straight off the top of the dome
you know i just write this shit in my head okay this is me free Relax. Freestyling for free. For you. Listen, bitch.
I miss you singing.
So talented.
Join the club.
Join the club.
Listen, bitch is the section of Miss Me
where we have questions from you to us.
And I know that happens in a lot of different places.
I'm very aware that there are nine million and a half podcasts in the world.
And a lot of them say, ask us anything.
So we thought, oh, let's have a theme.
Because that will really stand us out from the crowd.
We'll be like the rebels in the corner.
The James Dean of podcasts, if you will.
That's what people are really going to say about this podcast.
They're kind of like the James
Deans of the
podcast world
we said it for
them
I would die for
that review
it's not going to
happen I'll just
put it out there
let me just tell
you now
not going to
happen
so yes this is
listen bitch a
special episode
every Monday
where you ask us
questions and we do our best,
do our best to answer them.
The theme of this week is, Lily Allen,
boys from the 90s.
That's boys from the 1990s.
Boys from the 90s.
Just to get a, just to whet our appetite for this section,
which I am really excited about.
You did say, this is just for me.
It really is.
I've got some classic boys from the 90s
just to really get us in that space, okay?
What do you mean you've got Paul Nichols?
Oh, well, you were just going to say that.
Okay, Paul Nichols, yeah.
Paul Nichols.
He was so fit.
Paul Nichols was an actor.
He was in EastEnders.
He was Jewel.
And he lost his mind. It was horrible. It Nichols was an actor. He was in EastEnders. He was Joe. And he lost his mind.
It was horrible.
It was really harrowing.
And remember, his mum was Lorraine.
Lorraine.
Yeah, I do remember.
She had all the curly hair.
Yeah.
Paul Nichols, still fit.
Did Lorraine go out with Grant?
Yeah, maybe.
And he wasn't very understanding.
He wasn't very nice to her mental health
mental health issues yeah absolutely jonathan taylor thomas hey a little early 90s one
i have no idea who that is jonathan taylor thomas i have no idea who you are talking i think he was
i think he was the second thing i said every day for about four years.
He was in a show called Home Improvement.
He was middle son.
And then he was the voice of Simba in The Lion King.
Of course he was.
I went to the premiere of The Lion King with Charlie Condu.
Uncle Charlie took me through Elton John, got him a ticket.
I'm not joking.
I got to sit and I wore like a black beret.
Cool.
And a spaghetti strap, black dress over a white t-shirt.
Very 90s.
Wow.
I sat behind Jonathan Taylor Thomas at the Lion King premiere.
It was a huge, huge day for me.
So I got quite close.
That's kind of the closest I've ever got to one of my 90s kind of crushes.
And then we'll just round this up with a bit of classic Josh Hartnett.
Few are there.
I feel like he was more naughty as Josh Hartnett.
I know, you think that, babe, but no.
I thought that too.
But I was 16 in the millennium.
So he was, and that was when we used to sit around watching The Faculty at my mum's house in Kensal Green.
So that was like, we were like 14.
So it was like 98.
No. Yes, bruv. 14. So it was like 98. No.
Yes, bruv. Yeah. Stop,
bruv. But hang on. Do you want to know who my crush was in the
90s? Of 90s boys?
I'd love to. Not many people know
this. I think I can guess.
It's going to be quite a shock. Is it an actor
or a musician? I mean, both would
be a stretch.
Both descriptions would be a stretch for this person.
Okay.
They're also dead now, R.I.P.
Oh my goodness.
Stephen Gately from Boyzone.
Oh my God, of course I know this.
Oh my God.
The poster.
The poster.
Every room he moved to, that poster would come with you,
that Boyzone picture where he was at the bottom.
I was not really a fan of anything.
Surprise, surprise.
When I was a kid, I never had posters on my wall.
I did have one poster.
One Boyzone poster.
One Boyzone poster.
Just one.
They were all in purple.
I just loved Stephen Gateley.
I really thought we were meant to be.
I really thought that it was going to happen.
And as you know,
I have,
I've had a few celebrity crushes
and for the most part,
they've come true.
Made that shit happen.
Made that shit happen
to the annoyance of her best friend,
Rikita.
She just kept making that shit happen.
I just have to ask one.
Did you ever kiss Josh Hartnett?
no
okay that was an exer
sorry scrap that
I did go out with him
I did go out for him
with him one night though
oh wow you did spend a night with him
yeah wow that's pretty close
no I didn't spend the night with him
I hung out with him for an evening
that's what I mean
that's what I mean
oh yeah sorry we should have a question
we could just talk about this for hours.
Oh, I knew this would be a good theme.
What do you guys think? What do you want to know about boys from the 1990s? That's boys from the 1990s.
Hi, I'm Liz from York.
I'd like to know who you would snog, marry and avoid
from all the 90s boy band members.
Okay, I will avoid Brian McFadden.
I would marry Robbie Williams because he's rich.
I think I just really enjoy hearing you say Brian McFadden. Okay. I would marry Robbie Williams because he's rich.
I think I just really enjoy hearing you say Brian McFadden.
Okay.
Yes.
Sorry.
Sorry.
I would avoid Brian McFadden.
Just because of what he did to Gary Katona.
Sure.
And I would marry Robbie Williams purely because he's minted.
Actually, maybe Gary Barlow for the same reason.
Yeah, at least he's got a bit more soul, I feel.
Yeah.
And who are you snogging?
I mean, is it, am I in the 90s or is it now?
Yes, yeah, I think we're in the 90s.
It's 98, we're 14.
Well, Stephen Gately.
Oh, you have one true love.
Still Stephen Gately.
I would, oh my God. Okay, it it's the 90s not the noughties because then we'd have to start talking about lee from blue
i think blue might be 90s no i decided pop world they were like 2002 no no no, no, no, no. Yes, yes, yes, of course. They are not a 90s pop band.
Okay, going back.
Jade from Damage, I would snog.
Oh, sweet.
I would avoid Ben from A1.
He went to B-Dubs.
He went to my school.
I know he did.
I know he did.
And who would I marry?
Brian from A17.
How dare you?
No. the 90s
I was really into
pretty mixed race boys
so I would
sorry
I would marry
Jade from Damage
and I would snog
can't remember his name
but he was the lead singer
of Ultimate Chaos
Hayden
Hayden
Hayden
who I think
you can see
playing Michael Jackson
in Michael Jackson the musical
and when I found out I was like good for him
good for Hayden
I had a different kind of type back then
yes you did
next question
hi I'm Kate from Buckingham
what quality do you think men in the 90s
thought they needed to possess
which has since been
dispelled. Disregard for consent.
Total disregard for consent. I second that. Done. Next question. This is Ali from Sheffield.
next question this is Ali from Sheffield I once went out with a boy in the 90s and because I wanted to look after his Tamagotchi I just wondered whether you guys had gone out with
someone um for a weird reason thank you what's a Tamagotchi again it's the little digital pet
thing animal you have to keep alive yeah but it's not an animal. It's a calculator. Yes. I was never
into that. What is the
question? So doing something
just to go out with someone? Well,
she went out with him because she wanted to use
his Tamagotchi. So she's saying basically
did you use anyone?
Oh, okay.
Yes and no.
But my person's also
dead.
Sorry. Is it Jasper? Yes and no. But my person's also dead. Oh, sorry.
God.
Is it Jasper?
My first boyfriend, Jasper, who sadly passed away on my 25th birthday.
We weren't together, but we were very good friends.
I loved him.
He was my first love.
Lost my virginity to Jasper.
And he died in a motorbike accident in New York. And i remember him all the time i think about him a lot but he had this amazing um house
wow i think his mom did you start the rug company vanderheard something like that yes vanderheard
they are what a wonderful family and um yes uh he had this house in Notting Hill Gate
which was you know
the posher end of
West London
where I grew up
the grove I was in
and I liked that house
so when I first started
going out with him
it was for the house
but then I fell in love
with him
isn't that a nice story
I don't think I went out
with anyone in the 90s
oh
I think I was too young
I think that I my first boyfriend was L Oh. I think I was too young.
I think that I, my first boyfriend was Lester and I think that that would have been in the 2000s.
So can we have another question?
Hi, it's Thomas Hunt from Derby here.
Just wondering, did Steve Jones ever bang Pamela Anderson?
Thanks for...
My former colleague, Steve Jones,
who I hosted T4 with on Channel 4 between,
I can't remember the years, but for about six years,
2006 to 2011 or 12, I really can't remember.
But a long time, I spent a lot of my life with this man
and he was one of my favourite people to work with ever,
actually, Steve Jones.
I love Steve Jones.
I can say yes because it was so
public was it yeah it was everywhere we get it screamed at us in every town across england
for like years wow does he have anything to report back from that was it um did you say it was was
it what it was cracked up to be we were like brother and sister so i didn't really ask him
the details
but this was a strange time because it wasn't just pamela anderson that was a particular tryst
but actually there was like this year or two where every american famous actress and the english ones
would come in and just fall in love with steve like he would and he's not even like he's charming
but he wasn't like um trying to seduce these women they just loved him he's welsh he's not even like, he's charming, but he wasn't like trying to seduce these women.
They just loved him.
He's Welsh.
He's so handsome.
He's so funny and smart.
And I guess he'd be something that they hadn't met before or something.
So they would like leave their numbers.
Like big people would just be like,
always the person would come back and be like,
blah, blah, just wanted to give this to Steve.
Outrageous.
Outrageous.
Behaviour Steve jokes. Outrageous. Outrageous behaviour, Steve Jones.
Outrageous.
And the best I could do was a guy called Mark from a boy band called V, who didn't do that well.
They came after McFly.
And I really fancied one of them called Mark.
And one day, I got him.
Oh, I got him.
Did you?
Did you burn him?
Yeah.
Oh, wow.
I actually slept with him in a hotel in Newcastle.
Oh, the glamour!
When I was hosting a, like,
car phone warehouse awards or something.
Gets worse.
It's not a glamorous story.
Okay, it actually does get worse.
The company doing it went bankrupt
and I never got paid.
No!
Oh, God.
Ah, the early noughties.
Brown girls do it too.
You know, for most brown people, sex chat is off the cards.
Not us.
We love talking about it. From online
dating to offline mating.
I'm feeling fresh, you're feeling fresh. Let's get fresh.
We're back with a new series of
Brown Girls Do It Too. That is so
specific. Hit honest,
real and thought-provoking conversations
about one of the most pleasurable
experiences our mothers could never talk
about. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is what you call a tease.
Brown Girls Do It Too. Listen on BBC Sounds. experiences our mothers could never talk about and that ladies and gentlemen is what you call a tease brown girls do it too listen on bbc sounds
i did ask one of our friends our mutual friend jesse who we've known i've known jesse since
primary school and you've known him since you were about nine.
So yeah, same time.
Okay.
He said, I don't know,
it's kind of interesting that you say boys from the 90s
and not men because I feel like people were obsessed
with baby face men back then.
You certainly were, Keats.
I don't really have a question though.
By the way, she hasn't moved on from that obsession.
I don't think that's an obsession.
A type is not an obsession.
I do like pretty boys, yeah.
And you like quite fatherly figures.
I don't know if it's good for you to be crushing on pretty boys in your 40s.
Just FYI.
Pretty men are like pretty 40-year-olds and 50-year-olds.
I think that's what Jessie's saying saying is that we need to start saying
men. Yeah, but the thing is, this really gets on my fucking nerves in our friendship group.
I went out with someone really young about five years ago. He was 21 and I was 34.
And it was a really good, healthy relationship, actually. And it helped me turn my life around.
And I love him dearly. But before that and since then, everyone always goes, oh,
Makira and her young boys. That is the only really young boyfriend I've ever had. But
you guys have been saying this to me for years. Yes, boyfriend, but your obsessions, your
people that you've crushed on have always been like young pretty boys.
No, not younger than me. No, Not true. Can we leave out obsessions?
That's the word.
That's really getting on my nerves.
Okay, so not obsessions.
And anyway, I've opened up the world.
The world's opened up and I very much fancy men now.
So we're good.
Jessie and Lily.
And what about baby-faced men of that time?
Did they ever, I mean, you liked Stephen Gately,
so I suppose that did pique your interest as well.
I mean, he was the one, but he was sort of an anomaly
because I've always just, you know, I'm just daddy issues.
I've just wanted a big old hairy daddy forever.
That's all I want.
So, right, because you're looking for your father?
Because my dad also left.
But you didn't know your dad when you were,
so you were sort of like filling in the gaps.
I know who my dad was.
And my dad was sort of there but not there.
Inconsistent.
Yes.
So I think that yours was slightly like a fantasy whereas mine was like
trying to recreate something that existed oh my god you're so right hence the obsessions
crushes we're saying crushes not obsession we're not using thanks for being gentle with me
okay wow i have therapy later hmm i'm gonna talk about that you can have that one for free Thanks for being gentle with me. Wow, I have Theravulator.
I'm going to talk about that.
You can have that one for free.
Thank you.
I'll take that.
Wow, thank you.
I can't remember who.
Oh, Jessie.
Yeah.
Thanks, Jessie.
Thanks for leaving us to daddy issues like that.
Daddy.
Daddy.
Final question would be lovely. Hi, I'm alana from penniston i'd just like to know if this was just
a yorkshire thing or did every boy from the 90s wear an orange ben sherman shirt and jeans to a
formal event yes and it was fit i love that look or lime green green. Any sort of citrus.
Ben Sherman's in the citrus colour.
There's this Paul Nichols film actually called...
Is it Goodbye Charlie Bright?
No idea.
I think it's Nick Love.
Is it?
Great.
Can we move on?
Yeah, yeah.
We're not talking about that, but I'm saying...
Anyway, just out of the 90s,
there's a film called Goodbye Charlie Bright,
Paul Nichols film.
And it's so good.
And they're all in different citrus-coloured Ben Sherman or polo shirts for the whole film.
It's fucking wonderful.
He's very good, Nick Love, at that recreating, especially with costume, I think.
Ah, that kind of a time.
It's very real, isn't it?
Yeah.
He gets it very right.
Details.
Or his costume designers do.
God, that's actually something I would say from a previous question
that I wish more boys would possess now from the 90s.
Like, go back to that style.
Just jeans and a citrus-coloured polo shirt.
Oh, my God.
Wow.
I'm having a great time with this theme.
I really am.
I'm really enjoying it.
I don't know if I could deal with David, like,
bopping around in a citrus
coloured Ben Sherman.
Sometimes he wears quite a lot of Stone Island
and he's very big, David.
Like he's hench,
as in he works out because he's
a Marvel superhero now.
My husband, the Marvel superhero.
That is actually really ridiculous
that you're married to a superhero. I've never thought about it like that red guardian i'm the mrs mrs red guardian and
yeah he wears quite a lot of stone island and it's quite strange seeing an american in something
that i really associate with a very particular part of british culture yeah like the suburbs
and like the 90s.
And also, you know, I love my husband dearly.
Obviously, I wouldn't have married him otherwise,
but he doesn't quite understand what he's wearing.
Does that make sense?
Got you.
Totally makes sense.
It's sort of like Harry Styles.
Yes.
You know what I mean?
It's like, do you know about it, though?
You look wonderful, but do you know what you're doing and why? Do you know what I mean? It's like, do you know about it though? You look wonderful, but do you know what you're doing and why?
Do you know what you're doing?
Do you know what you're referencing?
Do you know what this is about?
Referencing, Harry.
I'm not sure you do.
But yeah, what I mean is,
I just want to meet a guy that wears that because it's in them.
That's it.
Well, you're definitely going to need to be looking for someone 40 or over in that case.
Fine by me.
Fine by me.
Okay.
You don't need to be so defensive about it.
New chapter, new age group.
From boys to men.
That's what we're calling this episode.
Boys to men.
Boys to men.
That's right.
That's what this year's about.
Boys to men. That's right. That's what this year's about. Boys to men.
Thank you.
I really enjoyed that theme.
I really did.
I kind of want to set the next one,
but you're going to do it, aren't you?
I'm going to do it.
So it's the statelessness of Shamima Begum.
No! on you. I'm going to do it. It's the statelessness of Shamima Begum.
Can't we warm up a bit before we go there?
He's diving straight in.
It's not the statelessness of Shamima Begum.
As you can see,
whoever picks the theme will
really guide the variation that
comes up on Listen Bitch,
which I think will keep it exciting,
keep everyone on their toes.
Okay, I've come up, I've got it.
I've got our subject matter for next week.
Oh, you don't want to do that now?
We're not going to do the statelessness of Shamima Begum,
as I'll call it.
It was a joke, okay?
It's on our fucking list in print.
Yeah, that's a thing to talk about.
Not on Ask the audience.
Jesus Christ, we're not GB News.
Okay, so
the subject
for next week's
Listen Bitch is, drumroll
please,
lying.
I love it.
I love it I love it
we have told some whoppers
in our day
get fucking ready
could end our careers
in one episode
to join us for this conversation
email missme at bbc.co.uk
or whatsapp us
and you can find the number in our show notes.
And send us a voice note.
It's way more interesting.
I want to hear the question in your voice.
Bye, Lil.
I'm going to talk to you on Thursday, yeah?
See you on Thursday.
Bye, love.
Oh, bye.
Thanks for listening to Miss Me with Lily Allen and Makita Oliver.
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