Miss Me? - Now That’s What I Call… Listen Bitch!

Episode Date: September 2, 2024

Miquita Oliver takes a walk down memory lane, recapping the best bits of Listen Bitch so far. Next week, we want to hear your questions about WANKING. Please send us a voice note on WhatsApp: 08000 30... 40 90. Or, if you like, send us an email: missme@bbc.co.uk.This episode contains very strong language and adult themes. Details of help and support if you’ve been affected by anything in this episode are available at bbc.co.uk/actionline.Credits: Producer: Flossie Barratt Technical Producer: Will Gibson Smith Production Coordinator: Hannah Bennett Executive Producers: Dino Sofos and Ellie Clifford Assistant Commissioner for BBC: Lorraine Okuefuna Commissioning Editor for BBC: Dylan Haskins Miss Me? is a Persephonica production for BBC Sounds

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This is the BBC. This podcast is supported by advertising outside the UK. BBC Sounds, music, radio, podcasts. This week's episode of Listen Bitch. Makita, me, I'm here. Lily Allen is not here. She is in the depths of Italy with no Wi-Fi to speak of. So we decided to reflect this week
Starting point is 00:00:46 We reflected on the meaty drop last week And we're gonna continue it with listen bitch because can I just say listen bitch is my favorite thing in the world this Silly thing that I've said to my best mate for years years is now yelled at me in the street on a daily Do not stop that ever. I absolutely love it enjoy being screened Listen bitch at me a lot And it just feels very loved and your questions are next level. I'm always very impressed They make me go deep they make me laugh and I actually do feel genuine connection So today we're gonna reflect on how our family grew our listen bitch family. So let's begin
Starting point is 00:01:23 I don't even know where the hell to begin with, Lissabitch, because it just takes you to so many unusual places. So we're just gonna begin in the heady middle of it. Let's just go. Let's start there. ["Lissabitch Family"] Hi, beautiful ladies. So this isn't a pub question but I wanted to share my rather random but lovely memory with you. So back in the early noughties, sometime my memory is somewhat hazy from this era, I'd gone to see a band, can't remember who. The Cooke's. In a pub,
Starting point is 00:02:00 in Soho, can't remember where. But feel like it was the downstairs of a restaurant. Towards the end of the night, Lily, oh god, oh god, you decided that you were going to take over the cloakroom and continued to operate as the cloakroom clerk. When I went to collect my quintessential Norties Rough Trade Records tote bag from you, we had a lovely chat, although can't remember anything we said to each other. After leaving the venue and being a good 10 minutes down from the road, I went to get something from said bag and discovered you had in fact given me Makita's bag, including her ID and phone! So that's how one of my phones is lost!
Starting point is 00:02:36 Unfortunately, this was long before camera phones, so sadly could not take photographic evidence of this, but I did return the bag immediately, missing our night bus to the annoyance of my boyfriend at the time. I tried to explain to you, Lily, what had happened. You weren't too interested, but you did give me back my correct bag. And I'm assuming Makita was none the wiser until this day. You'll be pleased to know I have absolutely no recollection of any of that. But that doesn't mean it didn't happen. ["Sweet Home Alone"] Hi, my name is Nancy.
Starting point is 00:03:17 I'm from Florida in the US and love the podcast. My question was, do either of you have a kink that you will not admit? And if you do, can either of you guess the other ones? Whoa. I don't know if this is a kink. Should I start? This is exhaust. I don't know if this is a kink. Shall I start? This is exhausting. I'm exhausted already by this topic.
Starting point is 00:03:48 I just have a little sex chair. I was gonna talk about that. A sex chair? Okay, please do pray tell. I need to know about the sex chair. Obviously. It's actually a sex stool. Oh my god. Okay. I can get it for you if you want. No, that won't be necessary. tell us about your sex stalled Mickey What happens on the sex stool? Oh?
Starting point is 00:04:09 Fuck I really can't believe I'm talking about this Wait so he's on the chair and you're on top? Yeah. Correct. Okay. And what is it about that that you like? Is it the feeling or is it like, is it the look of it from the app? Is it like, what is it? I guess it's the feeling!
Starting point is 00:04:34 Okay, so it's the positioning of the dick when he's sitting on the chair. No, no. It's okay. That's enough. How is that enough? What are we meant to talk about? Our aunties listen to Miss Me, Lilly. So?
Starting point is 00:04:47 I think they've all probably had sex too. It's okay. On a chair, I bet as well. Yeah, sex stools, does that count? Good, move on, next question. Yeah. Hey girls, I hope you're okay. It's Joe from London here. Now I wanted to start my question with a quick story. So I'm the same age as you too, and I don't know if you remember, but the tube platforms in the 90s used to have vending machines on them.
Starting point is 00:05:26 Anyway, I would run up and down the tube platform, checking the vending machines to see if anyone had left anything behind, like coins or forgotten chocolate. One day I was running down the platform and I found that one of the vending machine doors was left open. So of course I ambitiously stuck my hand into the machine and someone had shit in the machine. Now I don't know if someone had placed a dog turd in there or had strategically pooped in there. Anyway, my tiny little hand was covered in poo.
Starting point is 00:06:07 So I guess my question is, do you have any traumatic poo stories? I had diarrhea once when I was on stage. That was a bit of a disaster. No, no. What outfit were you wearing? I can't remember, but I remember I sort of managed to hold it in or I'd not eaten, you know,
Starting point is 00:06:24 because I knew that my tummy Was dodgy so I hadn't eaten that afternoon. But during the show I'd obviously been drinking and So when I had to come off for the encore, I was desperate to go to the toilet I think I was playing in like Montreal Vancouver somewhere in Canada. It was quite big Maybe like, you know couple of thousand cap Maybe three thousand cap or something and then ran up the stairs to the toilet, sat on the toilet, the heavens opened, shall we say, and I just remember sitting on the toilet and thinking, oh my god, this isn't stopping, and then suddenly hearing,
Starting point is 00:06:54 Lily, Lily, Lily, Lily, Lily, Lily, Lily, getting louder and louder louder and louder and this diarrhea does not stop it. No. It just would not stop. What compilation? Eventually it did and the lily lily lilies had sort of died down and I started panicking thinking, oh my god people are going to be leaving, they're thinking I'm not coming out for the encore and then I came out and I just was, I was just straight with everyone. I said I'm really sorry, I got diarrhea.
Starting point is 00:07:23 Did you tell the audience? Yeah, they thought it was hilarious. Hi, this is Helen Souter here up in Edinburgh. Could you actually explain to this old lady, what is ghosting? Is it not just ignoring somebody? What is ghosting? Helen, you just ignoring somebody? What is ghosting? Helen, you've come to the right safe circle. Correct.
Starting point is 00:07:49 Biddy, tell me about what it means in America and in your life. Well, if I had to explain it to someone that doesn't know, ghosting is when usually on the phone, not always, but it started with the phone, when you're talking to someone and you're some sort of back're talking to someone and you're, you have some sort of back and forth with someone and then you just completely disappear and you ghost them. You become a ghost and you're gone. This is so funny when you describe this. I'm obsessed with ghosting.
Starting point is 00:08:18 Just how much of a kind of new phenomena it is, but it's based in such old things, which is rejection and confrontation and cowardice and fear. Oh, God. Do you remember the rapper, the hip replacement rapper? Yeah. So I was like, no, this is the thing. I was really in quite a messy period of my life and I was quite into
Starting point is 00:08:45 this guy and we had a sort of like back and forth and then it just stopped and then a few weeks later I said to a mutual friend of ours, I was like, oh, can you tell so and so to stop ghosting me? And they got back to me and they were like, he says he's been trying to get a hold of you for ages. So I must have like drunk one night blocked his number. Been like, why is this bitch not getting back to me? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:13 Cause you blocked all pathways. That's a good trick. Self ghosting. Self ghosting. Never heard of it before. Incredible. Have you ever been ghosted? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:09:23 As in romantically chatting. So, cause also on my notes, it said it has to be ghosting is only in a romantic setting. Although I think people ghost friends now. Oh, no way. No way. I've been ghosted for sure. I had a crazy ghosting happen actually this December.
Starting point is 00:09:37 Shut the fuck up. It was insane. It was the craziest one. It's probably the craziest one that's ever happened to me. It was so I was like, did you die? Did you literally die? She was like somebody that I'd also known for years and had a plan, day of, on the phone, making a plan,
Starting point is 00:09:58 this is my address, be there at three. Never heard from him again, ever. Never heard from him. It was literally, I couldn't believe it. I was like, what a fucking little pathetic man. What a tiny little man. Like also, and then it was like- I was in shock, I can't believe this.
Starting point is 00:10:18 It was literally unbelievable. To this day, never texted me again. Somebody I had known for like years. I wanna know why. I did see that he was dating someone. Okay. And then I was like, oh. I didn't know people still did that.
Starting point is 00:10:35 No, I know. I genuinely didn't know people did that. Is this real? Quick one for everyone and everyone in the house. Billy's team, you might need this. When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time. Don't make them show you again. I don't know. I feel like I've done some really mean nasty things and I've changed.
Starting point is 00:10:57 Yeah, I think I'm, yes. Okay. Okay. When someone shows you who they are, believe them the first time, unless... It's me. Unless it's Lily. Hi, both. My name's Damon. I'm from Manchester, but absolutely loving the podcast. Every week, me and my partner are obsessed. On the topic of influence, I am very much an activist for the queer community in LGBTQI+. I'm wondering what influences,
Starting point is 00:11:45 or who has influenced either of you from the queer community, either now or growing up. Yeah, thanks very much. Thank you, I love the idea of you and your partner listening to Miss Me Together every week. That makes me really happy, thank you. I don't know if people know this about me, but I used to be managed by a management company That makes me really happy. Thank you. I don't know if people know this about me, but my...
Starting point is 00:12:05 I used to be managed by a management company that was owned by Elton John and David Furnish. What, in the early days? In the second album, from the second album onwards. Yes. And then... And I loved being managed by them and I'd love every year Elton would put on a Christmas party and I'd always sit next to him and he'd make me feel really special and he would call me like once every couple of weeks to check in and say hi and make sure that I was okay and there were some
Starting point is 00:12:35 times in that period where I wasn't okay and I remember he like sent me to his house in the south of France to like go and relax and dry out a little bit because I was you know perhaps not living very healthily at the time. Very Elton, I'd expect this from Elton like come come to the south of France let me look after you. I love Elton. Anyway we parted ways just after my third album, Jesus, came out. And I was very sad about it. And I wrote this long letter to Elton to say how sad I was about the situation and that I was particularly sad
Starting point is 00:13:20 because he didn't call me anymore and didn't send me, you know, I didn't get my bi-monthly phone call from Elton checking in and there was a big Elton shaped hole in my life. And yeah, and over the next few years as my life began to sort of spiral out of control, I held much resentment for the fact that I'd made myself very vulnerable in this letter and told him all about my sobriety and you know he's a sober person, Elton, so he, I thought that he would have responded to this letter and I was quite cross with him for a few years for not having responded to this letter because I'd been very, very sort of vulnerable and open and I thought it was mean of him actually. And then when I moved here to America, I was unpacking and I found the letter. I resented it.
Starting point is 00:14:14 Oh my God, oh my God. So I'd been harboring all this Elton resentment. I did feel like he wouldn't, Elton wouldn't do that. No, it felt so out of character, which is why I was so upset. I was like, I told him, I pulled my heart out and I told him that I wanted to get clean. Anyway, Elton, if you're listening,
Starting point is 00:14:38 which you're probably not, I love you and I no longer harbor that resentment towards you. So you will forever be the biggest queer icon of my life. And really, yeah, he was great. I spent many a good afternoon and phone call with Elton John. What a story. So you. I do have them. I do just pull them out of the archives, don't I?
Starting point is 00:15:05 It's a weird story. Every time you go, oh God, don't bother. I have no memory. And I'm like, where the fuck did that come from? No, because actually on that note, I sat next to David Furnish at dinner recently and I told him about the letter and he just looked at me like I was completely insane because I am, quite frankly. I was like, yeah, you know, really hard to do this resentment.
Starting point is 00:15:27 Was this before you'd found the letter that you hadn't sent? No, it was just when I found the letter, I was like, I might have been a bit frosty with you guys for the past few years. I'm really sorry about that. It's just that I thought I'd sent you this letter. And it turns out I hadn't sent the letter at all. And he was like, do you want to send the letter? And I was like, no, no, it's okay.
Starting point is 00:15:46 Poor David's furnished like, I'm sorry. Just miss me here being insane. I'm okay, thank you. I just had to get some things off my chest, David. Okay, you can go now. Enjoy your asparagus. Okay, see you later. Enjoy the lunch, I'll see you later. Say hi to Elton
Starting point is 00:16:07 for me. Everything's fine. It'd be quite nice to have Elton back in your life, wouldn't it? That'd be nice. I feel like he could then throw you a really great 40th birthday party. Are we there yet? Probably not. Hi Elton, I know it's been a while. I am turning 40 next year. She's wondering if you might throw me my birthday party. Because I no longer hate you for the better I thought I said. Anyway. Listen bitch, there's nothing quite like it, is there? Let's have a break. Let's all have a little breather
Starting point is 00:16:54 Welcome back to listen bitch You found us in a very reflective space We're looking at the journey of listen bitch how we've all come together throughout the year to discuss To interrogate to laugh to, to cry, to feel. Let's keep feeling. Let's have some more. Hi, Lillian Makita. It's Claire here in East London. Boobs is a bit of a specialist subject for me. I'm a nurse by background and when I was 33, I was diagnosed with breast cancer. I saw a little dimple and then felt a lump in my boob and I was just looking in the mirror one day
Starting point is 00:17:28 and noticed it thankfully. And I'm now fully in the clear. So my question for you both is, do you check your boobs and do you know what to look for? Bye. So I don't know if I do know necessarily what to look for, but last year when I was doing my play in London, I felt what I thought was a lump.
Starting point is 00:17:53 And I went to my doctor and he referred me to a specialist and I went to the specialist and he checked out my left boob and was like, I don't think that this is anything to worry about, but I've just felt something in your right boob that I do think is something to worry about. And I'd like to do an emergency biopsy right now. Jesus.
Starting point is 00:18:13 And I was like, huh? And I was quite shocked by the whole thing. And also I didn't quite realize how invasive a biopsy was. So I- I spoke to you that day and you had a show that night. Yes. And you were like, I've got to do this before. And I didn't. I had no idea that it was so serious. And he went, I went into this other room and they did the biopsy, missed and then did a second biopsy on it. And it was really, really painful painful and what did they do in a
Starting point is 00:18:47 biopsy it's like a huge needle that goes into you and it like scoops out a sample from the lump right and then they send it off to the lab to go and get tested and anyway so they did they finally got the sample that they needed and then he was like you know putting the dressing back on it and he was like, now I just want you to take it really easy for the next 24 to 48 hours. I was like, oh, okay, I wish you'd said that before because I've got to be on stage in three hours
Starting point is 00:19:14 being beaten the shit out of by two middle-aged men. Kicked about quite a lot. Terrible timing. And yeah, and then I had to tell Paul Kay, who was my co-star in The Pillar Man, that he couldn't beat me up quite as harshly as he had been up until that point. But luckily I didn't have breast cancer. It came back and it was negative. I've just had a friend going through it since the beginning of last year. You know her and
Starting point is 00:19:41 she's I think 46. And she just got married for fuck's sake we just had her wedding but she's all clear now but she had you know she yeah double mastectomy and it's been a hell of a thing to watch your friend go through actually. Did she have chemo? Yes. How did that make her feel? God awful. Exhausted. Yeah. Yes. My friend said that even just like looking at something was unbelievably tiring and painful. I think this is why I was saying that boobs last week when I sort of made boobs the theme is that it it's strange because you get older and your relationship to your breasts become very different because they could be something that could kill you and when I check because I do check for our lovely caller, Claire.
Starting point is 00:20:26 Thank you Claire for sharing what you've been through. I'm happy you're all clear now. I do check now. And I had to call some friends and be like, what am I checking for exactly? Because boobs get lumpy, especially around your period. And it's confusing, especially when you're looking for something. It's not a fun hunt, it's not an Easter hunt. You're like, I'm just looking for something that might terrify me so much that I think I have cancer in this part of my body that might kill me. It's a
Starting point is 00:20:53 really strange, difficult, terrifying process to check your breasts. But I'm now militant with it. And I have mammograms. I was so scared about my last mammogram, which is obviously when they scan your boobs and check that everything's all right. And I was all right. And I walked out of like, you know, a Hormatan hospital, walking down a street. I walked down every single fucking day and thought, God, this walk could be very different.
Starting point is 00:21:16 That's something I've been thinking about a lot. The way our relationship with our breasts change as we get older, they become so many different things. It's not just, do they look nice in this top. Actually, Claire is a nurse, so is qualified to tell people exactly what to do when they are checking their breasts, where we are not qualified.
Starting point is 00:21:36 So let's hear the rest of the question from Claire. What you need to be aware of is any changes to your boobs. You need to be aware of any kind of dimpling, any lumps obviously, any thickening, any changes to the nipple and nipple inversion if it feels pulled in. Personally, my lump that ended up being breast cancer, it kind of looked like it was being pulled in from the inside because it was. It sort of looked like a bit like puckering, but it kind of felt kind of clearly hard when I compared it with the other one.
Starting point is 00:22:22 Hi Lillian Makita, this is Stephen from Tamworth just outside Birmingham. Princess Diana famously wore her black Christina Stambolian revenge dress to get back at Prince Charles after he admitted cheating on her. Have you guys ever dressed for revenge to get back at somebody that wronged you? Love you. Bye bye. No. What are you talking about? Who told you? I've got such a good one but I just don't even know if I can say it. Why? Because the revenge was so good that you don't want to like, bait yourself up by it being revenge in the first place.
Starting point is 00:22:59 Yeah. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, I'm gonna tell you. A long time ago, I was like pretty strung out. This is when I was managed by Elton John's company and I'd been sent to his house in the south of France to like dry out for a couple of weeks. And while I was there, I got a phone call from somebody very famous at the time asking me if I could perform at a charity event
Starting point is 00:23:24 that they were involved in. She was asking me to sing a song with her boyfriend who was a musician at the time. And I said, I'd love to, but it's next week and I haven't got any time to rehearse because I'm in the south of France. And she was like, don't worry, we'll come out there and we'll rehearse with you. I was like, Oh God. Okay. Anyway, they come to the south of France, they arrive, and she's, it's like late afternoon, and she's like, I think you guys should sing The Sound of Silence.
Starting point is 00:23:54 Who is this? And I was like, oh, I don't know about that, I really don't want to, that's out of my comfort zone, I really don't feel like doing that. And she got the right hump, and I was like, I think maybe we'd be better suited to doing something like something stupid, you know, the Nancy Sinatra Frank Sinatra song. So I was like, let's do this. Anyway, I said, look, I'll go downstairs with your boyfriend and we'll practice the song and then we'll
Starting point is 00:24:17 come up and we'll sing it for you and see how you feel about it. And she grabbed my arm and she said, if you think I'm leaving you alone with my fucking boyfriend, you got another thing coming. No, no, no. And I was like, in the middle of nowhere, I was on my own in this house. And it was the two of them and just me. And she was quite a lot older than me
Starting point is 00:24:39 and a lot more famous and more successful. And I just thought, I'm stranded. And like, you've got me snookered like that but I was just like I'm banking this feeling like I will remember it and I will I will get you back one day. Oh right. Anyway. Right, right.
Starting point is 00:24:54 Although can I just say that was your MO in those days when you want to get with someone. We'll just go in this room. Her boyfriend was not someone I found remotely attractive and she was incredibly beautiful still is and so should not have found me remotely a threat. I was definitely in my like puffy, like strong out face. Anyway, so I digress. And now to the revenge part of the story.
Starting point is 00:25:16 We get to London, we do the event, make loads of money for the charity. She never said thank you for my involvement with this whole thing. Anyway, a couple of weeks later, I got asked by an award ceremony if I would be the recipient of a very prestigious award. I said, yes, thank you so much. That's very nice. And then they said, is there anybody that you would like to present you with the said award? And I was like, at what point in the proceedings does this award get awarded? And they're like,
Starting point is 00:25:49 it's the penultimate award. And I was like, there is no way this person will be able to hold themselves together for that long. And if I can stay sober, then she'll have to present me with the award. I'm looking pristine and brilliant and she looks completely fucked up. Oh my god. And it fucking worked. She done up a mess. Front cover of the papers the next day was like so and so is a complete mess and then pictures of me with my award.
Starting point is 00:26:18 Lily, Lily, that's some cold shit. Do you know what I mean though? Revenge is a dish best served cold. You waited, you waited, you planned and you executed it. You're like, remember forever bitch. Banked. Oh, never fuck you over. No, do you know who it is?
Starting point is 00:26:40 Let's just say they rhyme with ****. Can I maybe just like caveat and just say that that person, I actually really like them now. It was just a particularly bad phase that both of us were going through at the time. And all is forgiven on my part anyway, but she's probably just finding out. So if you are listening and you recognise yourself in this story, I'm sorry. It was particularly petty. Hi, this is Barney from Sussex. Really enjoying the podcast. I'd like to ask on the theme of pubs, who you'd like to fight in a pub car park and why? Barney! Unexpected from Barney from Sussex. Fight in a car park.
Starting point is 00:27:43 Okay, actually, you know what I will um no because if I ever see this person then they probably will beat me up but I'll just say only because I feel like I'm in a stronger position than I was in those days is it Mike Skinner what Ella oh she's finally here she's finally here. She's finally made her Miss Me Listen Bitch debut. There was a girl called Ella who me and Lilly just had tissues with. Like, her energy was just aggy. Well, she, I'll tell you what it was. She had our number. Yes, she saw right through us. Yes. And it terrified us. And she was just like, I know what you are.
Starting point is 00:28:29 And we were like, no, we're getting away with it. That is so it. She had our number and we knew it. And then like, so she was just a friend of some friends that came into our lives when we were about 20. And her name was Ella. But to kind of make her less powerful, we called her what Ella as in like whatever. some friends that came into our lives when we were about 20 and we were and her name was Ella but to kind of make her less powerful we called her what Ella as in like whatever what Ella which I thought was quite clever at the time and it did diminish her power. I think it was definitely Leric Strede that came up with that and then three years later I started hanging out with I met I made a new friend called Rob Pattinson and his girlfriend,
Starting point is 00:29:06 Nina, we all went out once. She went, oh, you got me my best friend. And it was bloody what Ella? I was like, oh my God, the hell are you doing here? In a whole new space. And she was a little timid, actually. Her energy had changed. Oh, really? Well, anyway, if... So that's who... I'll join you in the car park. But also I have a feeling that she's like a taekwondo champion or something. Like she's definitely got like a black belt in some martial arts. What? So I don't know why I've chosen her to fight with.
Starting point is 00:29:38 Because I seem to, I just remember that. Can I say, I would join Lily in this car park for the fight with Wotella, but in real life, in real life, I really don't want to bump into her, okay? She was really scary. Because you also, she looked like Nina, who did actually beat me up. Beat you up. Yeah. She had that, they both basically had gorgeous little doll faces with curly blonde hair and
Starting point is 00:30:03 pissing blue eyes. Oh, what Ella. I'd like to talk about a relationship of the past that hasn't come up and missed me unbelievably, which is your relationship with Lindsay Lohan. Oh yeah. Which was from, I will say yesteryear, I will say it again, because I don't know any other way to describe that period of time.
Starting point is 00:30:32 It was a long time ago. To be fair, we know Mark Ronson. Mark Ronson's sister, Samantha Ronson, started going out with Lindsay Lohan. It's not that you've seeked, you did not beg for a Lindsay Lohan. She was never just Lindsay to me, we didn's not that you've seeked, you did not beg for a Lindsay Lohan, she was never Lindsay, just Lindsay to me, we didn't get that far.
Starting point is 00:30:47 Lins. And I would like to know, I've never asked this, you sort of basically, chaotically running around the world for about a year, maybe six months. Not with Lindsay Lohan. Yeah, quite a few. No, I'd spent a lot of time in LA,
Starting point is 00:31:02 whenever I go to LA I would hang out with her. That was it, and then maybe you were in Dubai at something together as well Yeah, I think so maybe but we there was one night where we've been partying and I I Was staying at the Shadow Maman hotel, which for people who don't know what that is. It's like a sort of legendary Hollywood Hotel where lots of fancy things have happened. Anyway, I had like this sort of fancy room. She basically lived at that hotel on and off for a long time, but she wasn't at this time living there. But I was staying there and my managers had
Starting point is 00:31:36 stationed my security outside my room because they knew how much of a terrorist I was in terms of just like going out and partying until the early hours of the morning and I had to be up for the next morning to be on this something surgery with like Dr Drew, I think his name was. Anyway, it was like a radio show, but it was an early record. So it was like we had to get up and do hair and makeup at six o'clock in the morning or whatever. And, but Lindsay knew her way around the hotel. Lindsay climbed over the back wall of the hotel into my garden where my room was. And she was like, come on, let's go out this way.
Starting point is 00:32:15 So we escaped through the back and jumped over the wall and then went to the Shamrock tattoo parlor on Sunset Boulevard and got matching friendship tattoos on our fingers that both said shh on it. And I thought it was quite cool for about seven hours until I woke up the next morning and saw on Perez Hilton the headline, Lily and Lindsay copy Rihanna.
Starting point is 00:32:39 Oh no, like this couldn't be any worse. That's literally the beggiest thing that I've ever done in my life, is gone with Lindsay Lohan to beg friend Rihanna by getting copycat tattoos. To get shush tattoos on our forefinger. I've got the picture here. Jesus Christ, looks like a different time, didn't it babe? It was a different time but anyway Lindsay and I it was quite fraught for a bit between the two of us I can't really remember why maybe because you know I was close to Samantha and things got a bit heated
Starting point is 00:33:15 between them two but yeah but now things are really nice she texts me you know sort of intermittently when she's around in New York. She's back now, she's back on Netflix. She's producing stuff. She's very supportive on social media. She always likes my pictures and comments on things and I love Lynz. And why do you think that Lindsay Lohan and I share such deep personality traits? Because I've never actually met her. I didn't even ever interview her.
Starting point is 00:33:45 But you were like, she's you, you're her. And I'd just like to know what you mean by that. Because do you mean her just like sweet personality? No. Or her chaotic, crazy energy? It's a chaotic, crazy energy. It's like very much a nighttime thing. It was like, you know, when you're a little bit
Starting point is 00:34:03 exasperated and a little bit exasperated and a little bit had enough. And basically I have nothing to offer you anymore. So there's a lot of like, eye rolling, that kind of vibe. Oh my God, that was rude. You and Lindsay share that. Oh my God, I get it now.
Starting point is 00:34:18 Okay, move on. I get it. When I'm like, should we go? I've ordered a cab, we're gonna go to so and so's house. Yeah. Ugh. I don't wanna do that. Wow, I get it.
Starting point is 00:34:31 Oh my God. I can't believe someone else possesses that so deeply. Okay. Okay. Hello, Meketa and hello, Lily. Firstly, I would like to thank you for your beautiful podcast. I'm currently a dialysis patient and I listen to all your podcasts while I'm having my treatment. Anyways, in regards to raving, I did most of my raving on the island of Gran Canaria. We used to go to a club called La
Starting point is 00:35:06 Roca. It used to open at seven in the morning until two in the afternoon and then we would go back to somebody's apartment and party and rave a little bit more. So my question to you both is who was the last one at the rave amongst the two of you who had to be dragged out of the rave. And if you were to rave now, what time do you think you could make it to? Thank you, sir. I'm happy that Miss Meekin accompany you through something so challenging. I hope we're giving you some comfort
Starting point is 00:35:35 through this time in your life. Yeah. Okay, last one at the rave, you. This round goes to Makeda. Makeda, shut up! What are you talking about? In the past, you and Phoebe would stay up later than me. No. You two would keep going.
Starting point is 00:35:50 Absolutely not. I'm not like that. No way. Enterprise House. Please. Give it a rest. Okay, you're in denial. You're literally in denial.
Starting point is 00:35:58 Did you ever come and rave at Enterprise House? I'm calling Phoebe. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, the two of me and Makita, who was always the last one up? Makita, Makita would have been up last. She might not have been the last. Between the two of you, she'd be up last. Yes! Damn fucking straight.
Starting point is 00:36:39 You are so in denial about your own behaviour. I can't believe it. Oh, OK, OK. I'm fine. Hang up on that traitor bitch right now. Love behaviour, I can't believe it. Oh, okay, okay, alright fine. Hang up on that traitor bitch right now. Love you, Fever, call you later. We love you and we're gonna call you later, but thank you. Don't worry, we've outed all of our old raving stories today.
Starting point is 00:36:54 Bye, bye, bye. Ooh, and breathe. I hope that because it's the end of the summer everyone is in that reflective place. I know that I really am. Every time summer ends I'm like, okay, what went down? And I feel like a lot's gone down this year. So it was good to reflect. It's always good to look back. You don't know where you're going unless you know where you've been. Yeah, I think that's the lot. I think that's how we'll leave this my last Bit of advice for the world. We'll be back next week back to normal Lily's home Lily's in New York I'll be at home back to school. Everyone's back to work. I quite like that energy
Starting point is 00:37:35 We'll all get new pencil cases and the theme of course is Wanking thank you Steve Jones. I don't want to scare anyone, but everybody wanks. So I'll be looking forward to all of your questions next week. See you then, goodbye. Thanks for listening to Miss Me with Lily Allen and Makita Oliver. This is a Persephoneca production for BBC Sounds. If you've been affected by any of the discussion in the episode, you can find help and resources
Starting point is 00:38:10 in the UK at bbc.co.uk forward slash action line. Let's take a journey back to 2003. Canadian teen sensation Avril Lavigne was topping the charts and turning the music industry upside down. But what if I told you that the Avril Lavigne we know and love might not be the same Avril? What? Did Avril die? Was she replaced by a doppelganger?
Starting point is 00:38:35 I'm Joanne McNally and I'm doing a deep dive into a notorious internet conspiracy. Who replaced Avril Lavigne? Listen on BBC Sounds.

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