Mission To Zyxx - 210: A Wing and a Repair [ft. Sebastian Conelli]

Episode Date: August 1, 2018

Bargie isn’t feeling so hot, so the crew is forced to call a mechanic. Dar offers her unprofessional opinion. Pleck learns a couple secrets. Beano help! Featuring: Jeremy Bent as C-53 Alden Ford as Pleck Decksetter Allie Kokesh as Dar Seth Lind as Nermut Bundaloy and Suzanne Winston Noel as Beano and Christopher Moujan Zolfaghari as Bargie, Veronica and Tony Jr. With special guest Sebastian Conelli as 718Tony Edited by Seth Lind Recording, Sound Design and Mix by Shane O’Connell Music by Brendan Ryan Opening Crawl narration by Jeremy Crutchley Ship design for the Bargarean Jade by Eric Geusz

It is a period of civil war. The rebellion against the sinister and corrupt Federated Alliance grows stronger, and the fate of the galaxy hangs in the balance. Now, Rebel Emissary Plek Dexeter and his intrepid crew travel the farthest reaches of the galaxy to explore astounding new worlds, discover their heroic destinies, and meet weird bug creatures and stuff. This is Mission to Zix. AC-53.

Yes? Uh, I've been thinking a lot about what that guy, Phoenix Ash, said. What? Which part? About the planet crusher crusher? Yes, I've been thinking about that, too. The planet crusher was already very large. And to make another ship capable of crushing a planet crusher... Yeah, also just... How many planet crushers are out there to crush? Well, the real question is, like, who... Is that a good guy or a bad guy?

Oh, hey, Bargy. You seem slightly more cantankerous than usual. Everything okay? I'm a little under the weather. Oh. Everything kind of hurts right now. Oh, what was that? No, that's not.

I don't know what that is. I coughed out smoke. This is solid. No, no, but this is solid. No, no, but Bargy, when you did that, yeah, something solid fell from the ceiling. Oh, oh, I'm going to need that. I've been trying to help Bargy out, just kind of, you know, banging things around,

shifting things. I just, should I just end it right now? Is this the end? No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. What do I do? No, no, no, no, no, no, no. I've almost got it figured out. Dara, what have you done?

Do you remember what happened the last time you tried to fix a ship? Every night when I closed my eyes. It didn't go well. Yeah. And you haven't, you know, taken a class or anything in the meantime. No, no, no, I'm completely unlicensed. But, Margie and I have a special kinship, and I should just intuitively know how to fix that.

Okay, you know, we can fix... Dara told me she could make me look young and good, so I was just like, yeah, okay, let's do it. No, what? That's a real Achilles heel. Okay, well, I mean, Dara, the difference between Hark's ship and Bargy is that Bargy can talk to us. So, Bargy, how about you just explain to the three of us

what's going on in that, you know... He's over here, too. Okay, sure. The four of us to help, you know, and the rest of us, what's happening in you, and we can try to, you know, give it a fix. Okay, my center parts, they're like a reddish hurt. The center parts?

Sorry if I just opened up this. No, don't. No, don't. Now I'm going to squeeze a bunch of different things. No, don't... The center parts? Sorry, if I just opened up this... No, don't. No, don't. Now I'm going to squeeze a bunch of different things. No, don't squeeze. And just start jabbing when they start hurting. What is... What can you even squeeze?

I love industrial sludge. No, stop, you know, don't. I'm just going to pick you up here. Beano loves shitpuss. Yeah. Okay. Beano loves it. Oh, you heard him. Beano loves it. That's right, he. Yeah. Okay. Beano love it. You heard him.

Beano love it. That's right. He wants it. Okay. Listen, Bargy, can you... Kids love me. Wait, kids love you, but you wuv puss? So you can say love.

You just felt like saying wuv? Okay, Bargy. Sorry, Bargy. Yeah, we got it. We got it. We got it. Sorry. Okay, Bargy. Sorry, Bargy. Yeah, we got it. We got it. We got it. Sorry. Listen, Bargy.

The one wing I have is about to fall off. What? Oh, yeah. We need that. Look out the window. You can see it sort of wobbling. Oh, no. That's not...

How did that... My defense. I thought I was helping. Okay. Okay. That's not a... Yeah, listen. Do we know any, like, mechanics?

Can we call Nermit? Maybe he has a hookup in the Rebellion? Yeah, that's not a... Yeah, listen. Do we know any mechanics? Can we call Nermit? Maybe he has a hookup in the Rebellion? Yeah, that's possible. Outgoing transmission to Missions Operations Manager. I wonder if he's just sitting in his... Oh, yep, there he is. Hey, Nermit. I don't...

I didn't make it for you. I made it for whoever likes it. I really do love that he doesn't have to answer. Thank you. It just immediately goes into transmission. Just starts a feed. Nermin. Oh, hey.

What are you doing? Who are you talking to? There's no one around. Angry, under your breath. I just, like, I made the mistake. I try to never do this. You know how I put songs online? Vermint Nundulai. Vermint Nundulai. I just, like, you mistake I try to never do this you know how I put songs online I just like

you should never read the comments I started reading the comments and oh boy listen Nermit Bargy is not feeling very good and we think it might be like listen to this no no no I want to hear a couple of these next time try I mean that's to be fair

that's good advice. I did try. If you think about that review, they're not saying that you didn't try this time. They mean like, I'm glad you tried this time and you should again. And you should also continue to try. I love that art is subjective and constantly evolving.

I love that. All right, guys. Wait, let's hear a couple more comments. I don't want that. Alright, guys. Wait, let's hear a couple more comments. Uh, I don't know. So this says I built a time machine to go back and make your parents not meet. Whoa. That seems cruel. So anyway, what's going on with...

Right. My tummy hurts. My engine time gonna roll over. Oh, Nermin. Oh, guys. My engine time. I'm going to roll over. Listen, Nermin, we need a mechanic. Yeah, I think there's something wrong physically with Bargy. Oh, gosh.

Not emotionally like usual. Wow, I heard that. No, I just meant like... Wait, I can see out the window. The wing is at a weird angle. Listen, that was a mistake. It's partially damaged from the inside because Dara was trying to switch. What's up? One, two.

Oh, that wing is gone. What else? Just one free. Oh my gosh, that's the one wing. In my non-professional opinion. Are you, what could you possibly say right now, Dar? You didn't need to specify non-professional. It was non-professional?

Yeah. Nobody was thinking that. Under that impression? Yeah. Okay. I think we need a professional. Cool. Thank you.

Great, Dar. Wow. We might need like a, like a toe. Cool. Thank you. Great, Dar. Wow. We might need like a toe. A toe? Yeah. Oh, boy. Okay. Bargy, this ceiling is surprisingly clean.

What? Oh, you guys are upside down? Yeah, since we flipped over the ceiling. You keep it very clean. It's honestly cleaner than the floor. Oh, sure. Yeah. Oh, boy.

The lights just went out. Yeah, I think we're going to need a toe pretty quick, Nermit. All right, sure. Oh, boy, the lights just went out. Yeah, I think we're going to need to tow pretty quick, Nermit. All right, guys, I'm going to figure it out. I'm going to make some calls. Expect a tow soon. Thanks, Nermit. Okay. I can see that other window with your comments.

Close them for now. I will. Oh, my gosh. Bye. Hey, Bargy, just sit tight. We're going to get a tow ship, I guess. Now that the lights have gone off, how long would you say the life support systems would have until...

Well, how long it took me to realize tiny tooths was too tiny. Okay. Not great. Let's hope for that tow. How long if I pull out something like this? What are you doing? What are you doing? What are you doing? Centurion, honey?

Mom, get out of my room! It's totally normal to masturbate. No, Mom! I'm listening to my favorite podcast, Teen Creeps. Because on Teen Creeps, host Kelly Nugent and Lindsay Kaytai dive into the best YA pulp fictions of the 80s and 90s, Mom. Okay, that's a fun thing for you. Ugh, we're talking R.L. Stine,

Christopher Pike, Lois Duncan, Babysitter's Club. You wouldn't understand it. I don't. Why don't you go back to this stupid rebellion or making Dad jealous? I'm the leader of the rebellion. I'll be here listening to Kelly and Lindsay's dramatic reenactments from the book of the week and their awkward high school memories, which they dig up and parade around for everyone to hear because they're fearless.

And they're amazing, hilarious guests on this podcast book club that doubles as a sleepover. That's, again, very fun for you. You think I'm just a little kid, but I'm a reader, Mom. I know. And deal with this. They talk about crazy titles like Nightmare Hall No. 1, The Silent Scream, or Fear Street 15, The Prom Queen. So that's why I'm listening to Teen Creeps on the Forever Dog Podcast Network.

I subscribed on whatever podcast app I wanted to, and I'm not telling you which one. Run! Okay, just use lotion. All right, back it up. This is good. No, a little more. Back it up. How much more?

Back, okay, there you go. All right. Keep backing it up. Keep backing it up. Back. All right. Keep Back it up. How much more? Back. Okay. There you go. All right. Keep backing it up. Okay, bye. Back. All right. Keep backing it up. I'm backing it up right now.

Oh. He went too far. Look at him. I have a toe right up there. All right. All right. Move it forward a smidge. All right. All right. Good. Now locking it in. All right. Ah. This ship's a mess. Hey, sorry about having to get the tow, but...

Nah, nah. Glad you were so close. Thanks for taking us in. No, please. It's my job. What are you going to do? There's no good time for a tow, you know? Yeah, I mean, that's true.

That's true. There's never a good time for a tow. I'm just happy that you guys are pretty happy. Sure. So, by the way, hey, how you doing? My name's 718 Tony. Hey, 718 Tony. guys are pretty happy. Sure. So, by the way, hey, how you doing? My name's 718 Tony. Hey, 718 Tony. Shake my big hands. Oh, wow.

You have the big hand. Okay, great. It's quite a disparity. You have one really big hand and one really small hand. Yeah, I was born to be a mechanic, so my body has evolved to that way. So I got one big hand to, like, remove big objects. I got one little tiny hand

to stick in little holes. Look at my pinky. You see that little pinky finger? You're totally wrong. I don't have one tiny hand. I mean, I guess. I'm not sure that's the problem. I got a Phillips head pinky.

And then the ring finger, flathead. Sure, got to be. Of course, because back in my ancestors' day, they only had one Phillips head. And then they get screwed over. They didn't have the flatheads. Yeah, you evolved, back in my ancestors' day, they only had one Phillips head, and then they get screwed over. They didn't have the flat heads. Yeah, yeah. We evolved. Do you have a hex somewhere?

Oh, no, no. But hoping in a couple generations we got a hex on our body. Sure. Yeah, absolutely. So I could get out there. I could fix this all up for you. You know, it's pretty routine, so don't worry about it. Okay.

This is routine? I mean, it's routine for a mechanic like me. Is this ship a disaster? You mean like emotionally, like personality-wise? Where are you coming from? I'm speaking physically, but if the ship's emotionally a disaster, I have a buddy that's a psychiatrist. Oh, sure. But I would never go to a psychiatrist.

Okay. Oh, why? Because that's not part of my culture, okay? That's not part of my culture. I don't give a damn. I keep my feelings inside, okay? Sure. Well, listen, Tony, you know, I got to say.

718, Tony. 718. Oh, sorry. Is 718, Tony, your whole name? Yeah, that's my full name. Okay, great. What do you mean? You did 718, Tony?

No, this is the I've repaired 718 ships. Wow, Bargy, you're in great hands. And one of them is small and one of them is very big. Yeah, two great... Oh, boy. Oh, that does not sound good. But don't worry. She sort of always sounds like that, but usually the sighs are shorter.

It is technically worse now. Yeah. Don't worry about it. I'll take care of this. No problem at all. Okay. Let me go to the central controls. Yeah, yeah, absolutely. It's technically worse now. Yeah. Don't worry about it. I'll take care of this. No problem at all. Okay. Let me go to the central controls. Uh, yeah. Yeah, absolutely. It's just right up the ramp. Kind of down the hallway. Yeah.

Slow down, slow down, slow down. I got a bad foot. Oh. Sorry. So it's just right in here. Cool. Okay. Are you okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. What are you gonna do? You know? It's my gas foot. Sure, sure, sure, yeah. What are you going to do? It's my gas foot. Sure, sure, sure.

It's just a cloud of vapor. It's my gas foot. Don't worry about it. Is this right in here? Yep. Oh, no. Okay. Okay. He's been pulling parts out indiscriminately.

I was going to say you could see here where I first thought the diagnosis was that Bargy just needed a couple of wires pulled. No, you actually reversed the alternator and now we're going to have to go in there and make sure that we get those charges back to a negative and positive where they should be. Yeah. So I just kind of intermittently pulled wires. Yep. Mostly based on color. Okay. Can I tell you a secret? I would love toently pulled wires. Yep. Mostly based on color. Okay, can I tell you a secret? I would love to know a secret.

Okay, don't do that ever again, okay? That's a secret. That's a secret. Hey, hey, no one's in my secrets over here, okay? If I want to tell you something, I'll tell you something. Sorry, you're right, you're right. All right, I'm just going to pop in here. I'm going to reverse this.

Oh, wait, what? Wait, are you all right? Just a big wound just opened up. Yeah, everything okay? Everything's good. That means it's working. That means the ship's working, you know? What just happened?

What do you mean that means the ship's working? Oh, come on. The ship takes my energy. Every ship I repair takes energy from my being. Wait, what? Yes. And I get a little bit weaker with every ship. But it actually physically takes a piece of you.

Yeah, what, did you think I had a gas foot because I thought it was cosmetically fun? I don't know, maybe you were in a war or something. Hey, can I tell you a secret? Yeah. Can I tell you a secret? Uh-huh. Never assume somebody's in a war because either they are and they don't want to. Hey, hey, hey.

If I want to tell you that little piece of advice, I pull you over the side. Okay, mister? That's everyone's for me. Yeah, that's for you. That's for you. Let me finish all this. Okay. So, you know, I forgot my secret because this damn idiot over here.

Oh, my back. Never assume anybody's in a war. Oh. Now you're going to correct him on his secret. You're correcting me on my secret? I got to go. I got to go. Okay.

That's good. So never assume anybody's in a war. Okay. Because either they don't want to talk about it or they want to talk about it too much. That's a good one. That's a solid secret. They won. You're right. Honestly. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah's a solid secret. They won. You're right.

Honestly. Yeah. Oh, sorry about that. Oh, no. 718 chips. You're going to cough up a little shit sometimes, you know? Yeah. I mean, I guess so.

Yeah. How many do you have in you? My father only repaired 34. Wow. Whoa. Well, sure. Wow. Whoa. Well, sure, yeah. Yeah, I'm playing on the house money right now, so I don't know. And don't worry about payment either. What? What?

There's no payment. This is what I'm born to do. Tony, we could hardly ask you to fix Bungie for no croon at all. That would be... Weird. Don't you dare give me a croon. That would be an insult, okay? I was put out in the universe to repair ships. Oh.

And I will do that till I die. So, give us one quick second. We'd just love to talk in little asides. Sure. Barge is going to kill him. No, what? Barge is going to kill him. He's going to run out of pieces of himself.

There's so many things to repair. I didn't notice this until he turned around. But he doesn't have a lot of back. Like a lot of his back is exposed. Yeah, it seems to be. Think about not just the things I jacked up on, Bargy. Yeah. Think of Bargy in general.

The things that were already wrong. Yeah. Yeah. Hey, listen, 718 Tony, I feel like, especially we're not Pena. This seems like a big job. Yeah. Maybe we could just call someone else. Don't you dare.

Wait, wait, wait. Take your really big hand off of Flex's neck. It's fine. We will. I'm so sorry. I have anger issues, which I will never address. But you could. No.

I have a friend who's a psychiatrist. And I love that guy so much, but we never talk about issues. Okay, we're going to need to take this back to my garage. We're going to fix this up. Chris! Chris, we're going to need you to back it up a little bit. No, you go forward.

You got to back it up. No, you're facing me and you're going back. Face forward. No, Chris, you got to face forward and gotta back it up no you're facing me and you're going back face forward no chris you gotta face forward and go back you can't look at me what you want you want me forward and back i want you put your back to my fate oh my god i am going back right now you know you you know what my nephew made this stupid bot and i said said, you know, I'm going to use it. I'm going to use it because I'm a good guy. I'm saying, my nephew, he wants to learn this shit.

Sure, sure. You know? He built the bot. He built the bot. Yeah. So now I got my nephew's bot on me, and he can't do nothing. Hey, Chris. What?

Have you ever thought about fixing the... Can you fix a robot? Oh, no. I'm a shit mechanic. Yeah, I'm a shit mechanic. Yeah. Yeah, would you ask a toilet plumber to fix a sink? I would.

You would? Don't you dare. Hey, finally, you get a secret. Come over here. Come over here. You like secret time? Give him more secrets. You want another secret? Come over here. See, you're lucky I'm slapping you with my little hands.

Yeah, you would not want to slap her. I'm still moving back. Do you want it back? Man, he backed right into Barge. You want me to go forward or back right now? Just shut up. All right. All right.

Shut up, protocol. Okay. So it seems that, it seems, what's the name of this ship that you got? It's the Bargerian Jade. I can introduce myself. I'm the Bargerian. Oh, no. Ship of the Stars.

Usually she's far more eloquent. She has a very long resume. Oh, that's wonderful. Star of the Stars. Okay, we're going to need to get this ship back to my garage ASAP. I would say this ship has a two to three hour lifespan left in them. What? Two to three hours? Two to three hours.

This is actually a disaster. Can we get this back to my garage as soon as possible? Yeah, I mean, yeah. Absolutely. That's fine with you guys? What do we do in the meantime? Because, I mean... You want to ride up with me in the tow truck?

I mean, I guess so. Yeah. Cool. We're going to need up with me in the tow truck i mean i guess so yeah we're gonna need to do laps then what what does that mean people sitting on people's laps we're gonna need to do laps you already said yes so we gotta do laps c-53 could stay on pargy because he doesn't have to breathe or anything no i don't want why do i not include him no we should all be included, Plek. Okay, you're right. There's four of us, two and two. We're on laps.

I guess I just don't understand why I have, why C-53 is sitting on my lap. Well, I wasn't going to sit on your lap. Well, thank you for that. I wasn't supposed to. We don't love laps. No. Amino's in my lap. Sure.

Everyone's got somebody on their lap. Yeah, and I'm in 718 Tony's lap. Yeah, and how is someone... I'm on Chris's lap. Yeah, I'm getting crushed. There are two people on me. I can't see anything. I'm directing you, okay?

Oh. Keep going. Where? Just keep... How far? Keep going. I'm going. Keep going.

My goodness. More? More. More. Yep. Just seem to have your nephew in programs, you know? Sort of astrogate... Stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop, stop.

You're telling me. I wish my nephew did a lot of things. I wish he remembered my birthday. Sure. Okay. All right, keep going. Maybe a little over to the right. You're drifting a bit.

So what do you guys do? You're an emissary team for the rebellion. I don't know if you dabble much in politics. No, no, I turn off that crap. You know, keep your nose out the dirt. Your asshole stays clean. What does that mean exactly? Hey, let me tell you a little secret. Come over here.

Come over here. Move your big body. Come over here. Let me get this little pink guy over here. Come over here. Uh-oh, the big hand's coming for you. No, no, listen. I would kill you with that. You're right. Got you with the little one.

Yep, got you with the little hand. All right, more to the right. And we're here. Oh. Is that your beautiful wife out in front? Yeah. Hello. Suzanne, come here.

Give me a kiss. Oh, Tony. Oh. Tony, you have a new wound. You're fixing something? You better believe I'm fixing something. Oh, that's my Tony. Of course.

Oh, my goodness. Veronica and Tony Jr. Oh, come here, come here. One on each shoulder. Come on. Oh, jeez. Somebody take this camera and get a family photo. Oh, I love my family. Family is the most important thing in this world. See if it's really dark. Can I talk to you guys for a second?

Okay, listen, guys. I felt bad when 718 Tony told us that he was like, but... Now that you see his family. He's got two little kids. This seems... Oh, Mike, here's my nieces and nephews because all my brothers and sisters are dead. Yes, come over here, all of you. You little botchakaloops. I love the poop pad of all of you. Yes, Oni, Uncle Tony.

Yes. Yes. I will love all of you, and I will see you all to university. Listen, 718 Tony, your family seems lovely. I got to tell you. We have all 47 of these beautiful children. They are so nice.

You have to see the bill when we go out to eat, though. Oh, I bet. I say no sodas. No sodas. You know, we get one soda, we do the free refill for everybody. We do one soda, 48 free refills. Because I get two. Because Tony gets two.

Because I'm picking up the bill. But they're the best things in my damn life. Oh, man. That's really. We can't have you. We can't have you fix Bardsy. Listen. We can't have you fix Bargy. Listen. We can't.

What? Listen, I feel like surely there's another mechanic around. I don't want to say you're not a good mechanic. I just feel like... Clearly an extremely gifted mechanic. We're just worried that Bargy is so damaged that it would kill you to fix her. And if it does, that's my time. There's got to be another way.

If it does, that's my time. There's got to be another way. If it does, that's my time. Maybe you could just teach me, and then I could fix Bargy. Hey, let me tell you a secret. Oh, wait. That was a great idea. That was such a... I like you. You got a lot of spunk, a lot of spontaneity, a lot of spazazz.

Thank you. Could you do me a favor? Of course. Could you give Plek another secret? Of course. Hey, come over here. Actually, actually, what's your name? Dar. Hey, actually, Dar, why don't you give him a secret for me?

No, ow! On the top of my head? Wow, did you like that secret? I guess so. Come on, let me show you in this ship. I'll teach you how to do this. So when I'm not there, you can take care of it yourself. Thank you. That's perfect. Okay, great. So, Dar, you're gonna learn how to fix Bargy.

Yeah, and then it'll be like I never ruined her in the first place. Oh, can you do me a favor while we do that? They all have math homework we need to go over, and they're all in different grades. No, okay, I'm standing next to a droid. I think you chose me to... He chose you.

Direct that question to you. The pink one? Yeah. What is this? What is... That's a math homework. Okay, tell me where to stick my hands in first.

Okay, okay. So you see how we got seven mufflers on this back right here, right? Yeah. Great. So now I want you to look in all of them. You see one is clocked, right? Yeah. How can you tell what's clocked?

There's the kerchiefs that I stuffed in one of them. Exactly. Look for where you stuck shit in. Yeah, okay. Wherever you stuck stuff in, that's the one you want to fix. Yeah. Right? Okay.

Are you okay? Yeah, yeah, yeah. I'm great. I'm great. This is so good. You're helping me with the ship right here. Okay. Cool. So I want you to reach your hand. Great. Now make sure you put on the gloves because a muffler is hot. Oh, I should actually just be totally fine. My body runs at like 500 degrees normally. Egg on my face. Egg on your face. It'll be a fried egg.

Yeah, exactly. All right, so I'll just touch this. Letting go. Oh, yeah. Okay, so I am doing all the work. Yes, and you're just instructing me, and yet... I'm still hurting? Yeah, half of your face is now gone? Yeah, the left half.

My right's my better half, as Suzanne always says. Sure, but the whole reason I'm doing this is because I didn't want you to die. Well, here's the thing. If I teach you how to fix the ship, I'm hurt even is because I didn't want you to die. Well, here's the thing. If I teach you how to fix the ship, I'm hurt even more. You're hurt even more? I'm hurt even more. Oh, no. Yep, because I'm not only giving you the knowledge to do it now,

but I'm giving you the knowledge to do it in the future. Why are you stressed? Because I did so many bad things to the ship. Well, we're going to have to get through that together. Come here, let me tell you a secret. Okay. Aren't secrets weird when it's just two people in a room? It's just talking closer.

I mean, you are very close to my face right now. I'm so sorry, we'll back up. No, no, no. It really brings into focus that only half of your face is there. Oh, let me move to the other side. Oh, yep. Check out those pearly blues. Wow, that really is your better side my teeth were blue when i was born and my parents were never more excited

oh yeah they're beautiful blue teeth thank you hey the secret is uh-huh this is my job this is what i do do you feel like if you had talked to somebody about your feelings you wouldn't just derive all of your self-worth through what you do for work? Oh, too much for that brain. Too much for the brain. Let me fix stuff. Oh, hey, hey, C-53. Bargy has stopped smoking.

I think that's a good sign. I bet they're having a great time in there. Pink one? Yes? What is afterlife? Oh, boy. I mean, definitely don't ask C-53 that, because he'll give you an answer that's going to make you unhappy. C-53? No, I told you

not to do that. What is afterlife? Well, that's a fiction that many such institutions tell themselves to. No! You didn't even... How can these things... I'm doing things behind your back. You didn't even know that I'm trying to fix these things in the first place.

I used to have an Audi belly button. And now it's even bigger. Why does it look like it's even bigger. Oh! Why does it look like it's gonna burst? Oh, my. Okay, okay. Now flip the on switch. We gotta get this alternator running. No!

I won't. I won't let you do it either. No flip switch. No! Oh, did you hear that? That sounds good. Hey, Bargy? Bargy, can you hear me? Okay.

Everything all right? Do you feel any better? I feel a lot better, actually. I'm not 100 yet. I'm like 17%. Oh, great. We'll take 17. Not bad. You know, it's honestly great to hear your voice again, Bargy. I was worried about you. But, you know, whatever's going on inside there, it's two

people care about you a lot. That screaming is not from me, though. Wait, who's screaming? Ah! Dino, you stop right now. Listen to me. Listen to me. Everything's fine inside now.

We just have to get that wing on. Bino know how to put the wing on. What if Bino already had that knowledge? Bino, did you have that knowledge? No. Wait, is it K-N-O-W or N-O? Bino, no, as in... Bino, no. Bino, couple alternating internal coil seven to fusion thruster five.

Bino, no! I'm feeling really good, actually, you know? That's great. I've never felt so, I don't know how to say this, healthy in a way. You know, that never really happens to me. Bargy, this is amazing. I think whatever Dara is doing in the... Bargy, I'll be honest with you.

Look, I've been... Radiant. ...20 years younger. Wow. Yeah. Oh, wow. Maybe this is a good thing that this is happening. Maybe everything is good.

Where are my kids? Daddy! Yes! Oh, everyone come here and touch my ear. Tony! Suzanne! Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

Yeah, just back it up. Back it up. Christopher, Christopher. Christopher. I... I have it. I'm not playing. There's barely anything left of 718 Tony right now. Children, children, gather round. Gather round.

Your uncle, father, put your hands together. Stand in a circle around 718 Tony. Oh, this is what it's about. Life is about giving yourself and being with your family while you do it. And kissing. Do I have a heart for that? Yeah, man. Oh, yeah.

Those are the last to go, baby. Your best side of your face is still there. You better believe it. These pearly blues are all for you, mama. Can I put him down while you two are doing this? Please hold him. Hold him up. Yeah.

Do you mind just running your hands through her hair as we kiss? Yeah. He doesn't have hair. I can do that. Make one of them real big and one kind of tiny so it feels like Tony. Wait. I'm holding him? Yeah.

Okay. No. No. Ah! feels like Tony wait I'm holding him and okay I'm sorry I wanted me to read both of my hands I was trying to be right it was complicated instructions you couldn't do physically Thanks, Beano. I never really appreciated you thinking of putting the wing back on. Beano loves picking ship. Ship is currently okay with Beano. Beano loves ship. Okay.

Oh, this has got a lot of equipment on. 7-1-8, tell me, I have to admit we're very concerned for you. Are you going to be okay? Pull out my identification card. Pull out my identification card. Okay, yeah. What's the name on it? 719 Tony.

I'm going to be okay. I'm going to be okay. There's someone wearing cologne. I have allergies. I think maybe we should probably go. Where are you going? You're not gonna stay for dinner? I mean, again? I mean, what are you having?

We're going out to eat one soda? 50 people! You think it would be rude to leave before dinner? I agree. No way you'll leave on my planet without me feeding you. Listen, 719 Tony, you are... You are too... I mean, literally too kind. Yeah, that's fine.

Okay. I mean, I guess we'll go get dinner. Hey, let me tell you a secret. Uh, yeah, absolutely. I notice your watch is broken. No, no, don't fix it. Ah! I hope you're happy with that watch. What? I didn't ask for that.

Pink one? Pink one? Yeah. What is guilty conscious? Bargy. Yep. So glad to have you back. How are you feeling?

I'm feeling great. You know, I've never felt this youthful before. I never had this much energy for years. I feel amazing, like I could do anything, be anything, you know? Yeah. I'm goal-oriented now. I'm all about reaching goals. I mean, that's great.

I just, I'm so glad you're feeling better. Yeah, you know, I saw the end. I saw it in front of me. Whoa, that's great. I'm so glad you're feeling better. Whoa, really? Yeah. That can't be... That can't be right. I can help you. Yeah. Ease the pain. And I was ready. He said, I can increase your social media presence. That can't be right. If I give him my Chrome card, he should give me 5 million followers. Wait. Bargy, you didn't.

No. Did you give it to him? Yes. Bargy, these followers are just bots. And by that I mean droids that do single purpose actions. Listen, Bargy, it kind of sounds like you maybe got scammed there right at the end. I think you did. Bino, how did you learn all that stuff about ships? Bino, no. Okay.

It's like I set him up for that. Yeah. Bino, you know, I guess we all really owe you a debt of gratitude, Beano. Beano? Yeah, yeah, to you, to you, Beano. Beano, these are a bunch of broken parts that D'Ar took out of Bargy. Ooh! Beano.

No, no, no, no, we thought you wouldn't know where to put them. No, you were supposed to, you set up this whole thing like I'm good at fixing ships. Be no good at fixing ships. Be no no. I got to say it's weird that every time. Emissary Dixit. We have an incoming transition from missions operation manager. Plume Tardland?

What? Plume Tardland? Who is that? Hello? Hey, my dudes. What's up? Hi, sorry, have we met? Oh, Blackfeather, you're always pulling Plume's leg.

All right, guys, oh, the Bargerian, gee, looks like it's back in action. Cool, man. Wait, Plume, sorry, who are you? And what have you done with Nermit? Yeah, where's Nermit? What are you talking about? Let's do our normal cheer with the end of a mission. When the whole mission's operated,

the manager Plume brings it back in at the end of a mission, so we go, one, two, three. Yeah, I don't know what that is. Never in my life would I join in a group cheer. Oh, man, are you... How do you know our names? I haven't managed this team since the get-go. C-53, what the jug is happening? No, no, no.

What happened? Oh, man. I just came out of, like, a void. A void? What are you talking about? Who is Plume? Plume? There was a guy, Plume, like, a void. A void? What are you talking about? Who is Plume? Plume? There was a guy, Plume, the missions operations manager was a guy named Plume.

Do you work with Plume? No, I don't know a Plume. Bino, no. What? Wait. Bino think that commenter on Nermit Bundeloy's video decided to rewrite history by making his parents not meet, causing a rift in the multiverse. What?

Because Nermet Bundeloy no longer existed, the video no longer existed, which means the comment no longer existed, which means there was a time paradox, which means Nermet Bundeloy's parents meet again, and Nermet Bundeloy bought back into this multiverse. Right, but now the video exists again. Now the commenter made the comment. Wait, someone's typing. Someone's typing in the comment. I'm gonna delete it.

Disable comments immediately. Oh, I could've just disabled the comments. Oh, that was my best track. Well, it did cause you to non-exist briefly, so I don't know if it's your best track. That's really a good point. Nerman, I'm glad you're back.

Barji, I'm glad you're back. Yeah. Bajie, I'm glad you're healthy. Yep. Whoa, guys, this is crazy. I have Plume. Plume's ID card is here. Bino? Bino, I think you should just try it immediately.

Okay, yeah. Bino, no. Wait, no. Nermin, don't eat it. That's not how it works. That doesn't destroy Nermin. It's the only way to do now. Wait, no. Nermin, don't eat it. That's not how it works. It's the only way to do it. See you next time. Thank you. 718 Tony was played by special guest Sebastian Canelli. He has appeared on The Detour, The Last OG, Nicktoons, and MTV. He performs regularly with a law firm at the UCB in New York, and you can listen to his new podcast, Who You Were.

Follow Sebastian on Instagram at Sebastian Canelli. This episode was recorded at Robert Duffy Jr.'s Puppy Palace. Sound effects and mix by Shane O'Connell. This episode was edited by Seth Lind. Music by Brendan Ryan. Opening crawl narration by Jeremy Crutchley Ship design for the Bargerian Jade by Eric Gois Mission to Ziggs is brought to this galaxy by Audioboom

Thanks Audioboom And thanks for listening all the way through the credits Oh, I've also done a lot of films I'm now proud of I've ruined marriages and friendships The hatch that was a lot of films I'm not proud of. I've ruined marriages and friendships. The hatch that was leaking on sunshine. Leaking on sunshine, you said?

Yeah. Excellent. Battlefield Tellurian. Okay. Well, I'm not much of an art guy, so I haven't seen a lot of these films, but you know. Shirk 2. Shirk 2? Are you kidding? Oh, hello, donkey. Hey, donkey.

How are you doing? Nope, that was me. I don't want to talk about it. That was me. I don't want to talk about it. You were the shit that kept talking to the donkey. Yep. Oh, my kids are going to go nuts when they find out.

I don't want to talk about it. You're going to have to, donkey. I don't want to talk about it. Don't even do it. Can you do the voice for me? Do the voice. No, I hate it so much. Oh, there it is. There's the voice.

I hate it so much, donkey. I feel worse. You are a star.