Mission To Zyxx - 213: Attack Some of The Clones [ft. Leslie Collins]

Episode Date: August 22, 2018

The crew is sent to a CLINT cloning facility on a high-stakes sabotage mission. Pleck gets a hug. Dar and Nermut exchange lists. Bargie preps for an audition. Featuring: Jeremy Bent as C-53 Alden Ford as Pleck Decksetter Allie Kokesh as Dar Seth Lind as Nermut Bundaloy  Winston Noel as Rolphus Tiddle, CLINTs, and Beano Moujan Zolfaghari as Bargie With special guest Leslie Collins as Janelle Fitzmeyer Episode concept submitted by Patreon supporter Torgamous! Edited by Seth Lind Recording, Sound Design and Mix by Shane O’Connell Music by Brendan Ryan Additional music by Shane O’Connell Opening Crawl narration by Jeremy Crutchley Ship design for the Bargarean Jade by Eric Geusz

This is SeaRedIT5 with a quick message. Over on our Patreon, Zima-level supporters were given the opportunity to pitch a Season 2 episode to the crew, and this episode idea comes from the hilarious mind of listener and generous Patreon supporter Torgimus. Thank you to all of our Zima patrons for sending such great ideas, and to everyone supporting the show on Patreon. It is a period of civil war. The rebellion against the sinister and corrupt Federated Alliance grows stronger, and the fate of the galaxy hangs in the balance. Now, Rebel Emissary Plek Dexeter and his intrepid crew

travel the farthest reaches of the galaxy to explore astounding new worlds, discover their heroic destinies, and meet weird bug creatures and stuff. This is Mission to Zix. Hey, C-53? Yes? Um, I don't know if you noticed, but you know the eye that the grower mind laid an egg in? Yes. It stopped growing.

Sort of stalled out after a few inches. Let's just say those few inches are pretty noticeable. No, I mean, I know it's... I'm just saying, like, it stopped. I sort of thought it would get to a point and then, like, hatch or something. And now I'm sort of thinking maybe it's all fine. It's not fine.

It's four times the size of your other eye. But it sees real well. That might be bad. Okay. Nermit? Yeah. Okay, I've finished writing down all of my feelings and past partners.

Wow, the second list is way longer than the first list. This is amazing. Here is everything for you. It's like a ream. It feels wasteful to have printed this out. I mean, he asked for it a ream. Well, thank you. I mean, he asked for it in this fashion. Print is the future.

Yeah. Thank you for, you know, honoring that request. And do you have yours? Yeah. Here's the list of my feelings, which is, I guess it's... Oops, I dropped a couple pages of it. Okay. And I just wrote my partner on this

receipt. I know that this is sort of a personal moment between the two of you, but can you just... Who is that? Yeah, we need to hear all of this. No, it's just our... Oh. Oh. Yeah. Can I just say something? I'm really appreciating

all these interactions that are happening because it's helping me for my big audition oh wait what what's your big audition after i got a couple more followers on social media it's from a director oh it's a director let me show you it let me play you what he said bargy i saw your hollows on the hologram. And I want to tell you, I think you got something. You got something, kid. Come on in. Read a script. See what we got. Of course, he was replying to an image of myself when I was a kid.

He does not know my real age. But hey, I'm going in next week for the audition. What's the audition? It's for the audition. What's the audition? It's for a script. What's the script? I don't know, but I am so excited. So keep talking. I need to become everybody.

I need to know everything. So anything we say is just you're soaking it in for the audition? Yeah, for whatever it could be. It's just indiscriminately. It's for a script. You just want to hear words come out of our mouth? Yes, because it's helping as an actor. So it doesn't matter how I look like now.

What did you used to look like, Parchee? I had no wings. No wings at all? No, I was just a single vessel. Wow. How did you fly around? It just went up and down. Wait, Parchee, were you in an elevator?

I don't want to talk about it. Oh, wow. So I'm really excited. So just continue walking and talking. Emissary Dexator, I have an incoming transmission from Commander Rolfus 2. Attention, crew of Bargerian Jade. Long live the Rebellion. Yeah.

Sure. What's up, Rolfus? Hey, Rolfus, is hasty a feeling? What? Hasty. I don't think this is a feeling. Commander Tittle,

when you feel hasty, you are like, I gotta get somewhere, but I gotta get somewhere else even earlier. It's not a feeling. Thank you. It's not a feeling.

It's an adverb. Well, no, hastily is an adverb. Well, hasty is, is it a gerund? It's an adjective. Okay, why are you, no, I'm not doing this with you. It's an adjective.. Well, no, hastily is an adverb. Well, hasty is... Is it a gerund? It's an adjective. Okay, why are you... No, I'm not doing this with you. It's an adjective.

Don't be hasty. Right, that's it. It is an... No, don't make me do this. Crew of the Bargerian Jane, I have an incredibly important mission for you. Okay. Okay.

You seem like you're feeling hasty, honestly. I'm not. What are you feeling right now, Rolfus? He wouldn't feel hasty. He would just be hasty. Rolfus! Sisu, what? He would just be hasty. Rolfus! Cece, what? I just want to know where you are.

I'm in my office. Okay! I'm ready to have that talk! Oh, no. Rolfus, what is going on, buddy? Listen, I don't want to tell you what's going on. You can trust us, Rolfus. I am your superior officer.

Commander Tittle, have you, before this talk, considered writing out your separate lists of feelings and ex-partners? You could say joy and joy, maybe. Crew of the Bargerian Jade, due to a Garfon flu outbreak, most of our emissary groups are under the weather. Therefore, you are undertaking an incredibly important mission. Oh, okay. How did the flu spread so quickly through all the emissary groups? We had a

karaoke night. Oh, no. What? Enough said. I don't know why it must have gotten... Anyway, point is I need your help. Yeah, you just say the word. We're here for you. We're here for the rebellion. I want the crew of the Bargerian Jade to infiltrate and destroy a Clint-making facility.

What? A cloning facility. This is big league. Isn't this sort of a job for, like, a spy or a... Yeah. It totally is. You know, an airstriker? Yeah, all that.

But everyone has been laid low thanks to Garfon Flu. Wait, are we sending an emissary team? This is the one day of the year that it's going to be easy to get into a Clint cloning facility because it's Clintillion. Huh? What? The special day where all the Clint's go out on parade and it's easy for the public to go in and show their appreciation. It's easy to infiltrate. We're going to destroy it while it's full of visitors? No, you won't destroy it. All I need for you to do is to find the main cloning facility mainframe

The main mainframe got it The main mainframe of the cloning facility I'm telling you destroy no Take the DNA sample of you. And destroy it. No. Take the DNA sample. Uh-huh. Of you. What? It's not me. Huh? Huh.

Uh, we just figured that... The Clint's are not me. Why would you think that? Uh, no. Yeah. I've seen it, Clint. You've had it. Face-match comments. Yeah, I've seen that.

I'm better looking. Right. Anyway, take my... Well, take the DNA sample. Uh, that was... Okay. Right. Uh, that was... okay. Okay. That's nice. Anyone who can clone those killing machines must be hard-boiled. You might have to take them out. Okay. The security officer, Dar, will be counting on you there. Oh, Dar.

Oh, okay. You don't have a single sniper pilot who didn't sing karaoke with you last night? It was a big party. Why weren't we there? Hurtful? That is a feeling. Hurtful is a feeling. Will you be finished?

I have to go on a date. My fellow counselors, one more order of business. I have troubling, if unsurprising news. My beloved son, Tillian Rumpf, has gone missing again. Oh, no! That's really bad. It's true, and on Thursday he was due to compete in an horse riding event on Vifius III, and he never showed. Oh!

Yes, I fear I must convene a search party, and Clint's are of no use. He'll just present his fake and they'll be at his command. Of course. But how do I find skilled trackers? Kazoo, wasn't there some amazing hiring service you used to fill vacancies among the babies? Ah, yes! Zip Recruiter. Zip Recruiter posts the job to more than a hundred of the InfoWeb's

leading job board. Amazing. And as applications come in, Zip Recruiter analyzes each one and spotlights the top candidates so you never miss a great match. In fact, ZipRecruiter is so effective that 80% of the employers who post on ZipRecruiter get a quality candidate through the site

within the first day. Oh, perfect. Wow. What a relief. It sounds worth whatever incredibly high price they must charge. That's the thing. Anyone can try ZipRecruiter for free. That's right, for free.

By going to this exclusive web address, ziprecruiter.com slash six. That's ziprecruiter.com slash Z-Y-X-X. Oh, my goodness. Such relief. I'll go there immediately. So ziprecruiter.com slash Z-Y-X-X.

And I'll find the team of heroic rescuers who will bring back my troubled baby. I'm a baby. Right. Ziprecruiter, the smartest way to hire. Wow, I really hope people use the code. That would really help us out a lot, wouldn't it? Indeed. Thank you, Councilor Bollweed.

Don't you have some paste? Yes. Okay, bye, guys. Yes, goodbye, Bollweed. Bye, Bollweed. Wow! A lot of people come out to this clintillion. Yeah, I didn't know people, like, loved the clint.

Is this your first clintillion? Yes, it is. My wife and I, we come every year. They have amazing shrimp. That's really good. We're here for that. Well, we're also here to see the clint because we support our clint. Yummy.

Yeah, absolutely. Us, too. We're just three civilians. What's your itinerary? What are you hitting up today? Oh, that's a good idea. This festival is so full of events. Yeah, you got to go to the tap dance comp.

And then you're going to want to go to the cuisine. Yep. Her hands are full of shrimp. Yep. Now, you can get a fast pass. If you get a fast pass. You're going to want to get a fast pass. Yeah, you're going can get a fast pass. If you get a fast pass. You're going to want to get a fast pass. Yeah, you're going to get a fast pass.

Oh, oh, oh, oh. Oh, oh, oh. And you cannot miss a close-up magic, Clint. That is amazing. They do close-up magic. It is amazing. Or the Clint Haunted House. I love it.

You guys seem to know this, the whole Clint Hill. We come every year. And the shrimp. Great. Have I told you about the shrimp? You have, honey. Can I just ask you guys, is there a cloning facility? That is not on the map.

The only one who knows that is the manager. Oh, my rod. Oh, my rod. There's the facility manager. The facility manager? Oh, boy. Okay. All right. Just be cool. Be cool. Stay cool. Dar, be ready for anything.

This could turn ugly fast. Oh, hello. It is so nice to see you again this year. The shrimp this year are at this universe. I remember you from last year. Wait, wait, wait, I'm sorry. Oh, hello. What lovely color of your aura.

Dark, don't get so close. This is the feel. How are you? Come here and give me a hug. Dark, no. Okay. Oh, you feel wonderful. Thank you.

Well, it is so nice to meet you. You must be new this year. My name is Janelle Fitzmyer. I'm the facilities manager. It is so nice to meet you. You must be new this year. My name is Janelle Fitzmyer. I'm a facilities manager. It is so nice to meet you, Janelle. Oh, what a lovely hug. Thank you so much. Oh, who are you?

Oh, hello. I'm a C-53 protocol and diplomatic relations. Well, I can tell that what a lovely demeanor you have. That's very kind of you. You know what? I meet kindness in the face. Would you mind giving me a hug? I love...

Oh, sorry. That's... He used to be a sex droid. It's not a... That is all right. No need to be embarrassed. It is all part of the sentient experience. That's very understanding of you.

I love to meet new faces. Hi. Oh, well, look at you. You are tiny and lovable. Oh, wow. What a sprite. Wonderful. Well, give me a hug.

I'm sorry. I'm wearing my high heels and they click. I'll just hug your calf. Please do. Oh, what a wonderful calf hug. Oh. Well, hello, face. What a nice face.

And who are you? Oh, I'm Plek, the civilian Plek deck setter. You have a nice, bright eye. Oh, yeah. A couple of them. Well, one of them is an egg. I hope you're not embarrassed because I think that's

a wonderful feature. Thank you. See C-43? It's not a way I should look at a C-43 deck setter. Oh, Keck's ovipositor pierced his eye. Oh, that must have been an adventure. Yeah. I like to think so. Well, sometime you

should write me a letter and tell me all about that experience. You know what? I would love to do that. Well, and I love pen pals. Why don't you come over here and give me a hug? I like hugs. Oh, great. Yeah, me too. I'm not shy. I'm sorry I have a large bosom. Oh, it's no problem at all.

It's never been a problem in the past. Yeah, no, it shouldn't be. Are you... Yeah. Can I ask a quick question? Of course. Are you new here? Have you only just joined the facility?

I don't know. I go way back. So you've been the facilities manager from the get-go? The beginning of the Clint program. Absolutely. From the very beginning. I actually helped design it. Miss Janelle. Miss Janelle.

Click 4125. Yes. I just wanted to let you know that I just cleaned my weapon, and what do you think? Oh, it's wonderful and shiny, and you have done a wonderful job. Do you think I'm maybe the best one at cleaning my weapon? You know I can't play favorites. Oh, that's right. But what do you think?

Maybe it's me. All right. I'll give in this one time. Thanks, Mr. Janelle. You're welcome. All the Clint's really seem to love you. Now, can you just tell us what your job is as a facilities manager? Oh, of course.

It's actually maintaining them. Oh, yes. I do a little bit of this and that. I love to clean. And I love to teach. What makes a wonderful warrior, a wonderful fighter, is a fighting spirit. And one thing that we do is every morning we get up and we learn songs. And we love to bring everyone together and we do some um play

fighting uh mr dell mr dell uh look at me play fighting very good six eight seven four oh thanks do you think i may be the best at play fighting? You know I don't play favorite. I know, but maybe I am, though. Okay, just this one time. Yeah, thank you. You're so welcome. I love you, Miss Janelle. Oh, I love you, too. Oh, what a wonderful job I have, right?

Does that work every time? Oh, yes. You know, one time I played a practical joke. You don't mind me telling you my favorite practical joke. Not at all. Of course not. I put a lemon under a seat cushion, and it was a... Is that it?

Yes. Hey, what do you think? Wasn't it funny? Are you saying it wasn't funny? No, no, no. It sounds great. Oh, oh, oh. It sounds great.

Oh, oh. Now calm down. Okay. I'm sorry. Miss Janelle, calm down. Okay. I'm sorry. Miss Janelle, you've mentioned a number of songs. I don't think I've ever heard a Clint sing a song. Well, that's what's so wonderful about Clintillion, is once a year in the autumn of the moon,

we come together and we show the community just what we're about. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. Oh, wow. The music is about to start. That's right, everyone. Right this way. Okay, we are the Clintz. This one is...

Clintz. Is that the name? Is that your band name? What? Your band name is the Clintz? We're the Clintz. What? Clintz. No, that's... What other name would name? What? Your band name is The Clints? Yeah, we're The Clints. What?

What's? No, that's... What other name would we call you? No, that's... Mission LL, this one we wrote for you. Oh, how wonderful. Get down, get down, get down on the ground. Get down, get down, get down on the ground. Get down. Get down. Get down on the ground.

Everybody get down. It's regulation time. You have to give a fake or it's going to be mine. Everybody get down. It's regulation time. That's a nice fake. That's a nice fake. Get down. C-53. I feel like most of these lyrics... Most of these lyrics are just things Clint's saying.

Miss Chanel, what did you think of the song? Oh, wow. What did you think? I was blown away. Really? I am year after year so touched by your talents. I think you have so much potential. Thank you.

All of you, each and every one of you. I don't know. I think maybe me. I don't know. It might be me. Well, I think I'm the drummer. So put down me. You are a very talented drummer.

Miss Janelle. Miss Janelle? Yes? I just want to let you know that I'm going to go mop the main mainframe facility right now. Okay, wonderful. That's great. You're right on time. What do you think of the mop? Is it pretty good? I know where you're going with this. Right. And you are my favorite for right now. Thank you very much. Thank you. Oh, hey, 4276? Yeah, that's me. You know, if you really wanted to make a mark, you'd probably mop your way all the way to that mainframe. Yeah, from here to the mainframe.

Michelle, do you think that would... Well, I have to say it would definitely be against protocol. Oh. But since this is the one day that we open our doors to visitors to appreciate what we do here, you know what? I will allow it.

Mop down on the ground. Mop down on the ground. Janelle, I notice that you really take time with each of the Clint's to build their confidence. Every Clint is special. I mean, I guess they're clones, though, right? Well, yes, but it's a little bit more touchy than that.

I never talk about this, but I had a son many years ago. What? It is upsetting to talk about it. It is upsetting, but sometimes you have to share your emotions. Yeah, it's okay to talk about your feelings. It is okay. I'll talk about my son. I lost him.

You know when you go to the store and you just have a moment of forgetfulness and leave your child behind. I went into the store and I bought some bee box and some Zuzu's and I forgot that I left my son. Oh, no. And your son stole your speeder? He stole my speeder, yes. And I never saw him again.

Wait, so Rolfus was an adult when this happened? Yes, I believe he would have been in his early 30s at this point, sitting at his mother's speeder, waiting for her to buy some. I have created all of these clints in the image of my missing son. So there is something in each of them that is close to me. Hi, everyone.

I'm sorry to interrupt, but it's the love of the clint. Tush shaking content. Oh, I apologize for being so sentimental at that moment. You lost your son. I did. And your feeder. Okay.

While Miss Janelle is distracted, we have to keep following this wet trail before it dries up. He's really taking his time with the mopping. I thought he had gotten further away, but now I see he's still very close. The mop has a fake. It's a very close. The mop has a fake. Mop and mop. It's a good fake. Emissary Dexator, I believe this is the main mainframe. Yeah, the wet mopping leads right up to this door. All right, I'll be just going to get in.

Oh! Oh. I am back. I'm sorry, y'all. I had to tinkle. Oh. Oh. I don't mean to be so crass, but it's best to be honest what are you looking at

now we're just we're just oh were you curious about the main frame door let me turn it's okay it's an alarm and it comes on sometimes let me just turn that off

4 6 2 9 7 5, 4, 4, pound, pound, key, key, pound. Please enter. There's a key key on the keypad? Oh, yes. Okay. Absolutely. Sorry, continue.

Would you guys like to come on in and see the main thing? You know, I normally wouldn't let anyone in here, but I trust all of you. So why don't y'all come on in. And if you would like a treat, I love to teach people how here at the facility I make a client. Would you like to see that? Yeah, absolutely. Come on in. Okay, everybody. Wait, no, no. Come on in. Okay, everybody.

Wait, no, no. When you say you make a Clint... Well, I run the machine. Yeah, myself. Who else works at the facility? Oh, why, it's just me. Wait, you make every Clint yourself? Absolutely.

From Clint 0001 to... Oh, goodness, how many do we have now? I guess that would be Clint962748. Oh, wow. Congratulations. Now, what happens when you make a Clint? Oh, well, right here is the main unit. Okay. And now you see that we have these four buttons here on the right. Okay.

This is the Zabulator right here. Sure. And then the Perret Pulse. Uh-huh. Then we have the Zenith beam here. And then right down here, we have a volume. Volume. Yeah.

Now, what happens if you change the volume? It's just the volume of the machine. Well, isn't it fun to turn up the volume? Sometimes, yeah. That makes sense. I'll push these buttons in a certain sequence here, and you can see exactly how it comes together. I make a clint. The whole entire process takes about two and a half minutes, and then we have a fully formed clint.

Do they come out fully formed? Almost. Their bodies are made of a grown clint, but their minds are still very undeveloped. New clint in three, two, one. Oh, is it? So precious. Come, come. Oh, this is my favorite moment. If you don't mind.

They come off the assembly line with their helmets on and everything? Yes, they do. And they usually come waddling over to me where I give them a cuddle. Wait, why is it walking towards me oh well this is unusual I don't want this well you must have feelings what do you mean I must have feelings well sometimes our clints are in need of nurturing when they come off of the line. And they're naturally usually drawn towards me. I am a maternal spirit for most of them.

Dara, were you not honest about your list of feelings? Up. Up. What, Dara? Lift up. I think he wants to go up. Why are you so demanding? It's a newborn. He has the body of a man, though. I mean, I could physically lift him.

I think that's what he wants. Don't mind. Lift the baby. What a wonderful moment to witness. What a glorious moment to witness. How long does it take a Clint to go from, like, sort of fresh off the... I don't want to... Get down on the ground. Get down on the ground. That answers of you to get down on the ground.

Oh, oh, oh. Calm down. Pretty fast. A pretty quick process. Yeah. Mission out, mission out. Uh, yes. The Clint's are having a Clint-off outside, and it's getting really competitive.

Oh, well. That's too competitive. What is a Clint-off? Oh, what happens is they stand opposite each other, and they kind of jab at each other's sides. It's the beginning of learning how to spar, and sometimes they get a little bit too rough. If you don't mind, I could run down the hall. I will be right back, but just make sure you don't touch anything. No, no, no.

If you did, put it exactly back where you found it. Yeah, absolutely. Okay, I'll be right back. Okay, no, no. Put it exactly back where you found it. Yeah, absolutely. Okay, I'll be right back. Okay, fair enough. Now, Sir Dexon, this may be a perfect opportunity to take the DNA sample out of the clinical machine. Okay.

Now, was that the Zerblinator or the Zenith ray? Where do you think the genetic sample is kept? It's right here in this slot on the panel. Oh. See that slide? Yeah.

Wow. That's the origin of all the clints. Mm-hmm. Okay. All right. Emissary deck center. Now, I'm going to pop it out. I'll only have a few seconds because the alarm is going to go off, right?

Uh-huh. Use this chemical lamp to be thorough. Uh-huh. Yeah. Reinsert the slide as quickly as possible. Sure. And then boom, we're done. Great.

All right. Here goes. It is out. Oh, jeez. It is out. Oh-huh, yeah. Reinsert the slide as quickly as possible. Sure. And then boom. Great. Here it goes. It is out. Oh, jeez. It is out. Oh, boy. Okay, all right. And it's back in. Okay. Oh, wow. Now I'll use the chemical wipe to clean my hands and we're good to go. No, no, no. I have Rolfus juice on my hands. I'm not gonna... The wipes are to clean the slide.

Rolfus could easily still be on the slide. He can't just wipe on it. Well, I am back. Thank you all for waiting so patiently. Everything we put back and we didn't touch anything. Did you have a good time while I was away? Yeah.

I mean, I had a pretty good time. Looking at everything. How is the Clint-Off going? We unfortunately lost a couple of downs. You lost a couple Clint's? Yes They jabbed each other's sides to death in the Clint-Off Yes, it does happen

and it is always so sad but it is part of all of Rod's process I guess Seems like a process distant from Rod's Yeah, it's like you're the Rod Yeah, it's like you're the rod. Yeah, a tiny bit. So let me play a little rod here and push some buttons and make some more clints.

Oh, with the machine. Yes, of course, with the machine. We're actually... Oh, you don't need to stay? Yeah, no, actually we are just tuckered out after all that clintillioning. Just get back on the ship. And we haven't had any shrimp yet. Oh, you have to try the shrimp buffet. All right, and Sam Dexler, I think we should probably leave as soon as possible.

So we're actually not going to get any shrimp. Doggone, wait, not sure that's the best use of our time. Hey, uh, uh, Bargy? Yeah, well, hey, hey, hey, sorry I was in the middle of memorizing any word. Take care, Randy. I'm just looking at all the words. In there. In there. Yeah, that doesn't help.

Okay, uh, Bargy, uh, we're all good here, so just any time you can come in for a pick-up. A pick-up. Come in for a pick-up. I'm a villain. I'm gonna be picking you up. That seemed... No, that seemed... I don't know. That's crazy.

No, no, wait. That's actually great. Oh, wait. What do you want me to actually do? Yeah, if you could actually come and pick us up. Yeah. All right, you know. I'll get there when I get there, because I will be there.

Is that just a nonchalant character, or are you really not coming out? It is just a nonchalant character, I'll be pleased. Wow, wow. Did you just see what happened? A new character just came in. Wow.

I would book myself. I would book myself. Yeah, we're sort of a little bit under a time crunch because we think we really need this. Can I just pitch? Let me just pitch a new character for you. Rubbed up, rubbed up, rubbed up, rubbed up. Is that the character? It was.

It's called Rubbed Up. You're sure this was a director? Yeah. His name was at director in hollows.com. He asked for money up front? Yeah, I gave him a couple. Hey, Bargy, I'm sorry to interrupt. We just sabotaged a facility on a planet that is literally crawling with Clint, so we need to get out of here.

Is that a script? I love it. I would do it. No nudity. I would do nudity. I do nudity. What am I saying? I would straight up just take all the. I would do nudity. I do nudity. What am I saying? I would straight up just take all the haul off and just show bear engine.

Don't do that as practice. They call it rehearsal. Hey, what are you guys doing? What? Get down on the ground. Yeah, sure. Absolutely. Of course.

Oh, my God. Get down on the ground, guys. Wait. I'm sorry. Could you say that again? I said get down on the ground. But could you say it with your mask off? I don't, listen, I'm just asking you politely to get down on the ground.

It's just that you don't sound like... This Clint is like a little, a little weird, right? What is that supposed to mean? I'm just saying, because most Clint's sort of have a deeper voice. Oh, okay, sure, great, yep, thanks. I'm the one with the gun here. Is there a problem over here? Yes.

Is there a problem over here? No. What? No. Is there a problem over here? Hey! Come on! Oh, boy.

It's a bleach. Yeah. I'm a pink lightning-fitting pneumatic trooper. Oh, no. We will use the wipe in the wrong order. a pink lightning-infused pneumatic trooper. We... will use the wipe in the wrong order! What? What are you talking... I used the wipe! Look at that...

You're supposed to use the wipe on the slide, dummy! Look at... look... look... Do you see? Yeah, no, I see. Okay. But do you get it? I think I... I think I get it? I think I get it. I think I get it. Hey, guys, are you going to get down to the ground or what? No.

Okay, you know what? That's fine. Hey, get down to the ground. Oh, yeah. Yeah, absolutely. Get down to the ground. Yeah, of course. Absolutely.

Are these guys bothering you? Sort of. Yeah. Yeah. Yes. Sorry about that. Trim put the face that way. Thank you.

Okay, thank you very much. Have a good one. Can we get up off the ground? We're giving swirlies. Swirlies? Yeah. Oh, that seems... Yeah.

Okay. We gotta get out of here. C53, are they just gonna keep making clints that are based on me now? I don't know. Oh, now it's Mr. Nelson. Excuse me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Before you leave.

Sure. Pardon me if I seem a little rattled. I was just leading some of the new clints in... No, we saw some of them. They seemed great and normal. Did they? Mm-hmm. Very special boys. Something seemed a little off. Mr. Hill. Yes?

I have a gun. I didn't polish it or anything. I'm holding it now. Oh, CD3, am I going to have to kill her? No, please don't. She's got punishment enough. Wait, what's that supposed to mean? Thank you, Miss Janelle.

Well, guys, I think it's safe to say we did sabotage the cloning facility. We certainly didn't stop their ability to make new clints we just ruined the clints well that's kind of ruined ruined is a strong word they're just sort of different now different um hey guys how's it going uh good. Can we help you? Ah, just seeing what was going on. Cool, cool. Hey, what are you doing here? I'm just hailing the Bargean Jane. Oh, what?

Why? Oh, because they were leaving, and I sort of thought it was a good thing. You did it after they left? Yeah, no, I just, I don't know. Hang up, hang up. What are you doing? Okay, yeah, sure, fine. Okay.

Bye, guys. Different. I think worse is okay to say. Oh, oh, the director sent me a new video. I think it's the script. It's gotta be the script. Hey there. Kiddo. I think I'm still young. Listen, uh,

we found another elevator for this one. They gave a great elevator pitch, and so we had to take them. And that's the game. Those are the breaks. Thanks for the crew. Bye-bye. Oh, Bargy. I'm sorry. Bargy?

I'm sorry. I'm going to memorize exactly what he said and go into the audition. Oh, boy. Thank you. Bargy, I don't think he's still alive. I know. I'm just trying to find some positivity in a chucking situation. Wow. You know, Bargy, I got to say, I think I learned a little bit something about positivity. Okay, fair enough. Now you're right. Fair enough.

I'm sorry, Dexter. I have an informing transmission from Commander Roth's titil. Hey, crew. How did everything go? Good. Perfect. Depends on the... They do not have your DNA anymore. Right.

Terrific. Well, it wasn't mine to begin with. Sure. But... Okay. Yep. Wipe that slide. That DNA we can confirm is gone.

Fantastic. It's safe to say they won't be making any clints. Like the ones they made? Yep. Yep. And also, we got a really strong dose of maternal love. I don't care. Why would that be part of the debrief?

Because she's your mom, but it's fine. She's your mom. What? What? No. No. It's not my mom. Thank you for getting it done.

We don't have to talk about it anymore. Great. Sure. All right. Rolf, what are you doing in the closet? Emissary Dexter, I have an incoming letter from Miss Janelle Fitzgerald. Oh, no. Like a recorded letter?

Do you think she knows what we did? Oh, no. I a recorded letter? Do you think she knows what we did? Oh, no. I mean, yes. Okay. All right. Here it comes. Dearest ones and new friends. Plek, Dar, Nermit, C-53, Barchie, and Dino,

who I have not had the pleasure of meeting, but I look forward to one day. Ha ha ha. I just want to tell you what a pleasure it was to meet you, become your friends, and I think by the end of our journey together,

love each and every one of you. Things have been a little bit off since you were here, but that is okay. That was like five minutes ago. I'd like to say that I'm plugging along. Things are all well. And I hope to see you all, please write soon. Ta-ta, love, love, kiss, kiss, hug, hug, Miss Janelle Fitzmyer. Wow, I really expected there to be some sort of threat at the end or some kind of shoe to drop it.

That was just straight up nice. You know how people feel about their mothers. That's a good point. That's a good point. This is SeaRed IT5, credits and attributions droid, commencing outro protocol. MSA Replic Deck Center and The Plinths were played by Alden Ford. C-53 was played by Jeremy Benn. Security Officer Dar was played by Ali Kokesh. Bargy the Ship and Sisu Gandu were played by Mujan Zulfagari.

Missions Operations Manager Nermin Bundeloy was played by Seth Lind. Bino, The Clintz, and Rolf Estidl were played by Winston Null. Miss Janelle Fitzmeyer was played by special guest Leslie Collins. Leslie has been performing and teaching improv, musical improv, and sketch comedy for more than 15 years. Listen to her improvised bedtime storytelling podcast on pinna.fm or welovebedtimestories.com For stupid showbiz stuff, visit her

website that she never updates, lesliemariecollins.com This episode was edited by Seth Lynn, with sound design and mix by Shane O'Connell. Recorded at Bronze Studios West in Los Angeles. Music by Brendan Ryan. Opening crawl narration by Jeremy Crutchley. Ship design for the Bargerian Jade by Eric Gois.

Mission to Zix is brought to this galaxy by Audioboom. Thanks, Audioboom. Thanks again to our Patreon supporters for pitching episode concepts and for supporting Season 2. We jucking love you. Hey, guys, are you going to get down on the ground or what? No. Okay, you know what? That's fine.

Hey, get down on the ground. Oh, yeah, of course. Get down on the ground. Yeah, no, absolutely. Yeah, yeah, yeah. These guys bothering you? No, that's not it. Go ahead, forget it.

No, no, no, that's funny. That's funny. That's funny. Get down on the ground. Oh, yeah, of course. Get down on the ground, nerd. Okay, of course. Get down on the ground, nerd. Okay, yeah, no, absolutely. These guys bothering you?