Mission To Zyxx - 507: A Little Ditty 'Bout Jakk and Shai'An [ft. Chris Grace and Eric Gersen]

Episode Date: July 27, 2021

Starring:Jeremy Bent as C-53Alden Ford as Pleck DecksetterAllie Kokesh as DarSeth Lind as Nermut BundaloyWinston Noel as AJMoujan Zolfaghari as BargieWith special guests Chris Grace as Shai'An and Eric Gersen as JakkEdited by Seth LindSound design and mix by Shane O’ConnellTheme music composed by Brendan Ryan and performed by FAMES Macedonian Symphonic OrchestraAdditional music improvised by Eric Gersen and produced by Shane O'ConnellOpening crawl narration by Jeremy CrutchleyShip design for The Bargarean Jade by Eric Geusz Audio hosting by SimplecastMission to Zyxx is a proud member of the Maximum Fun network.

This is Sierra at IT5. Our live performance on October 3rd at the Bell House in Brooklyn, New York, was sold out. But good news! Additional tickets are now available. Info and tickets at mission2zix.space Hello? Bargy? Anybody? Can anyone hear me? The sandstorm must be blocking the signal. Ugh, and my feet are so sore. Why would you make it so the thing that you walk on becomes painful to walk on when you walk on it too?

It makes no sense. Well, I can find some shelter if I just open my eyes real wide in this sandstorm. Oh, Rod! It's air... Why would you make ocular sensors so wet? Space. Some is chill. Some is tooped up. All is part of the great, infinite, cosmic ballet.

Cosmic Ballet. The venerable starship, the RSS Synergy, forges ever deeper into uncharted regions of their galaxy, growing the coalition of united planets in the name of science, benevolence, and peace. Now, lead envoy C-53 and his intrepid crew explore new worlds, forge alliances, and search for a way back home to finally fulfill their... Mission to Seize! Hey, Bargy? Yeah? Um, who are all these people surrounding the ship?

Oh, there's just a lot of sentients who are interested in speaking to me. The sentient spaceship. Oh, I know. It's very exciting times for me right now. Bargy's having a moment. Oh, great. Bargeri and Jade question? Yes, I'll be with you in a second. I'm just

talking to my inside. What is inside of you? Yes, I have inside. We love you. I love you too. Say two words. It's just a bunch of scientists and reporters. Ah, scientists. Yeah, they're asking me questions like, what makes you tick? Oh. What does make you

tick, Bargy? Who you know. Uh... Pain and rage? It's that giant clock. Anyway, they also took a couple of my wires. They said they're gonna use it to study what I am. Oh, cool. I don't know what that means. Sounds fun.

Were they important wires? The bathroom doesn't work. Don't worry about it. No! Listen, the scientists need to figure out what they need to figure out, and that means that we don't have a bathroom. That's what it means. Okay. All right.

Can you move the crew away from the window for these photos, please? You want to say hi? This shoot is about how the spaceship is alive, and if we see these people in the window. Yeah, you can just bounce them to another direction. Oh, perfect. Perfect shot. Thank direction. Perfect. Perfect shot. Thank you.

Ow. Ow. Uh, wait, wait. Where's Robot Man? Yeah, see? Are you gonna get that? Robot Man! Yeah. Robot Man! AJ, relax. Relax.

Robot Man! AJ, he doesn't need... he's around here somewhere he'll answer the call yeah where is he though normally when we do these missions he's aj how does your speaker your helmet speaker can get that loud how is that possible sometimes when i have to do crowd control i'm on crowd crowd control setting now. Okay, all right. Normally it's like, you know, obey us. Right. Surrender your will to us. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Sure.

Is someone going to get that? Sure. He's going to go to voicemails. No one gets that. It's just the butt. Yeah, he's got the whole thing where he says Nermit's title. And honestly, if I answer it, it just feels like I'm trying to reclaim something that I don't even know that I liked in the first place.

Hi, yes, this is Bajie's voicemail about Jerry and Jay Hollow's stuff. I'm currently lost in space, so I cannot answer your phone call. Delone, if this is you, don't be a coward. You know what you did. Bajie out.

Oh, wow. Hey, everyone. It's Nermit trying to reach you. I've never gotten the old voicemail before. So I guess call me back kind of immediately when you get this. Everything is totally cool, but I would drop everything else you're doing. Just give me the old ring-o. Please pick up. Hello?

Run, my man! Break in the sandstorm. Gotta try and meet up with this representative before it starts up again. Okay, time to find Cheyenne, son of Jack. I guess I'll just... Let's try this way. The knees, too? Nothing on this body works right. There's a man over there. Oh, um... Excuse me.

Hello, yes. I'm... Well, I'm not a man. It's sort of not worth getting into. The chameleon skin of a man inside a machine. Or a machine inside a man inside a machine or a machine inside a man. Yes,

that's sort of accurate. I am C-53. Where's that music coming from? That is... I agree. The crying of a bird Yes An insect on a leaf

The setting of the three suns In harmony We greet you And I, in return, greet you I am C-53 The setting of the three suns. Okay. An insect on a leaf.

We greet you. The setting of the sun. Okay. I feel like I'm missing something. Oh, my name is Cheyenne. Oh. Cheyenne's on a jack. Oh, my name is Cheyenne. Oh. Cheyenne, Son of Jack. Fantastic.

My name is Cheyenne. Son of Jack, step back. Oh. Boy, you're going to have a good time in this little town of mine. The Fells Wargo trucks are coming. I can understand the words you're saying, but the meaning is being lost. Oh, wow. I can't even... I can't contact Bargy or anybody. There's some kind of interference. Cheyenne, son of Jack, I am C-53. I'm a lead envoy from the coup.

The coup wants to know why everyone on this planet mysteriously disappeared. What happened to the 54th sea? Why do there have to only be 53 seas? This rock has got water everywhere We've got oceans and rivers and lakes But only 53 seas Seas Did you write a song about my name?

Or is that... A song is as good as a handshake where I come from A little island on this rock of mine A song is as good as a handshake where I come from We write a song as a handshake You write a song as a handshake We also don't have hands You couldn't shake it even if you wanted to

Cause you don't have hands I think I understand on some level Your people use song to communicate Everything becomes a song Every word we have in our language Would be a lyric in yours I wrote a song about you Now you do too.

Cheyenne, son of Jack. Oh, a song about you. I'm looking at a man. He's got no hands. He's looking at me like he wants me to sing him a song So I'm singing him a song I hope it won't be too long Before this man says

Not a bad job on that song He's like a child He writes songs like a child Okay, well, I just don't know that I've done a lot of it before. Like a child a little starling flying through my sky sleep all of a sudden I'm so

drowsy we both sleep as I cradle you Shahan, son of Jack I can't stay awake The cat is in the silver spoon And the cradle is the moon Oh, uh, hey guys, Nermit's calling again.

You know what, I'm just going to pick it up. Hey, Nermit. Ah, there you guys are. Sorry, we didn't pick up the, we thought C-53 was going to pick it up, so we never did. Oh, no, he's not there. Is he back with you? Well, that's kind of the thing, is he's... He's on a mission.

What? Wait, we're not on a mission. We're waiting for a mission. Right. I'll give you a mission momentarily, and that mission is related to the solo mission that C-53 went on. What a solo mission! What are you talking about? Hold on. What? No, Dart, you talking about? Hold on.

What? No, Dart, you're squeezing my heart. It's just so much change, you know? I just, I don't understand. Yeah, where is C-53, Nermin? Well, you're going to find out because your mission is to rescue him. But he, as lead envoy, he sometimes goes up. Nermin!

Yes. Nermin, we're a crew. We're a team. If C-53 is in danger, it's probably because we weren't with him. He might still be on the ship. AJ! I can't... My ears cannot handle any more of that.

How long has this been going on? This particular mission? Let's see, he left... No, no, no, no, no. Solo missions. How many of these solo missions this been going on? This particular mission? Let's see, he left No, no, no, no, no. Solo missions. How many of these solo missions has C-53 gone on? Um, He just left.

Yeah, why didn't he just walk away? Nermit, get back on screen. Nermit, get back on screen. Nermit, get back on screen and quit being a coward. Okay, so he has gone on six of these. They've all gone well. Get back on screen. Let me back! Nermin, get back on screen and quit being a coward. Okay. So he has gone on six of these. They've all gone well. Six?

Yes, he's gone on six solo missions. We haven't even gone on six crew missions. We've only been here for a couple weeks. He's lead envoy. Lead envoy. Ugh, we know. Nermin, how does he even have the hours in the day to go on missions without us? Well, you all sleep every night, and he seems to think he doesn't have to. No, he does.

That makes sense. He's been very sleepy on some of these missions, but that's when he goes, at night. Nermit. Yes. Where is C-53? Okay, C-53 was sent on a solo mission to GEC-3. No, it was C-53. Now you know that?

You just literally yelled, don't do it. GEC3, that barely sounds like a planet. What's, I mean, is there a civilization there? Well, it's funny you should ask. There was. So the only one there now is Cheyenne, son of Jack, who C53 was sent to make contact with to find out why everyone else is missing. It's like you're asking all the wrong questions.

What? I want to know what makes C53 better than all of us. Dar, no, no, Dar, we're a team. He has a cube with sentience. Because he sweats now? Is that? Because I don't sweat. That, if anything, is a deficit.

Nermit, Nermit. I just want to recap. Sure. You sent C53. Yes. Nermit. Nermit. I just want to recap. Sure. You sent C-53. Yes. On his own. Yeah. To a planet.

G-E-C. Where the only thing we know about it is that people have disappeared from it. Right. Because you think he's better than us. Yeah. And now you're surprised that he's gone and you want us to go help find him. I knew he was gone. I'm calling to tell you he's gone. Well, why don't you

find another AI in a meat sack to find him? I mean, we honestly would have, but there aren't any, so... We're not even your first choice for saving him? Wait, you said to send another team to save Z53?

I didn't. Oh, boy, Nermit. If you all are so obsessed with being together as a crew with C-53, well, great. Your mission is to rescue him. I don't like this. I don't like this, Nermit. We're going to go save him, but it's because we're his best friends and we're the best crew. Not because it's our mission Nermit send us the coordinates and then I want you to go sit in the corner of that big old office building and

have a think about how you treated us today yeah yeah okay here are the coordinates and I'm gonna sit in exactly the center of this giant office okay Okay. No corners for this Lurd. Okay. Hey, here's a question. When we get down there, should we, like, call for him or something? No. I think we could just look with our eyes first and see how that goes. Say anything?

Nah. No, we certainly don't need to scream anything. All right. Thank you. Come again. Oh, I forgot to give him a warranty card for the nips on that droid. Step fine. Gee, boss, I'm real sorry.

How many times do I... Wait. Step fine. Step fine. Yeah, boss? Where did you get that outfit? It looks amazing. Wow, thanks, boss. Normally you look all slumped and putrid in that oil-covered apron, but today... You see, I've been using Stitch Fix. What?

Stitch Fix. Huh? They offer clothing hand-selected by expert stylists for your unique size, style, frame series, and budget. What? It's the easy solution to finding what makes you look and feel your best. You're telling me I, Fondo Parkwad, could look this snazzy?

Sure, boss. Stitch Fix even has free shipping, easy returns and exchanges. A prepaid return envelope is included, and there's no subscription required. It's a much better customer experience than here at the Droid Emporium. Stefan! I mean, there's no subscription required. It's a much better customer experience than here at the Droid Emporium.

Stefan! I mean, there are no hidden fees ever. That's fair. We do have a lot of hidden fees. Those nips aren't really free. Hey, boss, if you get started today at stitchfix.com slash zix, you'll get 25% off when you

keep everything in your fix. I'm listening. I slash zix, you'll get 25% off when you keep everything in your fix. I'm listening. I mean, actually say that one more time. That's stitchfix.com slash zix for 25% off when you keep everything in your fix. Okay. Hey, get out of here. I've got to get my fix! Wow. Still not used to sleeping.

Very weird. Very uncomfortable to suddenly regain consciousness. Oh, right. Cheyenne, son of Jack. It's not very musical. Cheyenne, son of Jack, thank you for guarding me as I slept. The smell of a bison

recently slaughtered. Oh, that's very bloody. Thank you, Cheyenne, for this midday feast. I thank you for it, though I need it in the least. I thank you for it. I thank you for it Oh my god, the flowers are growing back all around us. Cheyenne, I must ask you,

where does this music come from? Where does this music come from? Oh, you're tapping your chest. It comes from you? Ah! The music comes from you. You are the music. you you are the music the music man

that's what they could call you if they wanted to give you a name other than Cheyenne a song from my heart. Literally a song from my heart.

A sentient face instead of a heart that plays its own music. Oh, my rod he's got another entity fused to his chest and he's playing what looks like a piano key necktie you got it

okay you don't sing no I don't sing I just I'm fused. Yeah, well, that I can see. A song from my heart. A song from his heart. A song from my heart. A song from his heart.

My heart. my heart I feel like when I was in a frame I would have had the range but this is GEC3 I mean there's nothing on this planet yeah do you want me to show? no

so this is where he goes to be alone. I don't think so. Dart, I think C-53 might be in real trouble. We need to help him. Do you guys hear that? Kind of like a lilting kind of delicate melody. Yeah. We do.

It's hard to see. Is it coming from that little oasis over there? I don't know. In my training, we would call this a vamp. But I'm not sure. What training? What training would you use? I served a tour of duty with Quincy.

Oh, okay. Yeah. I think that's just a regular tour. I think you toured with them. So are you both just going to talk over the vamp or what? Well, that's what you do. You talk over vamp. Yeah.

You sort of lay out what's going on. Yeah, exactly. It's like that's what you do. You talk over vamp. Yeah. You sort of lay out what's going on. Yeah, exactly. It's like there's the oasis. We should follow it. Yeah. Two pebbles in the sun. What's that? Two pebbles in the water.

Whoa, look at that guy. Yeah, he's really burly. Echoing out. He's got a nice voice, though. To the edge of the pond. Oh, you really can have it all. By the two pebbles. Bonded forever. And life.

C53. It blooms all around them. Those two pebbles surrounded by green by life A lush verdant wave of life C-53!

Oh, you're here. Thank Rod. When you hit that last note, a palm tree just popped out of the ground. Also, it was just artistry. It was just very... Yeah, it was... It brought us into the song. Beautiful.

I mean, I've never seen C-53 seem like that before. Why are you hiding that from us? Why are you hiding that from us? It really hurts when you squeeze it that hard. Ah! Strangers at the barricade! Strangers at the barricade!

Strangers at the barricade! Who are they? Who are they? Cheyenne! Be not afraid of these strangers at the barricade. These are my friends, and they have come to offer us aid. Listen, the alien doesn't have hands, so I feel like I could take him.

No, AJ, stop. No, I think this is fine. We don't need to. AJ, it's not. No, I don't think it's that. C53, is everything okay? What happened here? I don't think it's that.

C-53, is everything okay? What happened here? Envoy Dexeter, this is Cheyenne, son of Jack. But maybe I should put it a little differently. Just explain what the... Two pebbles soaking up the sun. Two pebbles laughing, having fun. Two pebbles laughing, having fun. Two pebbles. They only want more.

But now there are two pebbles. Because here are four more pebbles. Six pebbles in the sun. And there'll be many more pebbles before we're done. Wow. And this pebble looks like this pebble used to be in charge, but is no longer in charge. What? He nailed you, Dar.

And this pebble is thinking of days gone by when he used to sing with other guys. That's me, I think. Are you guys going to do one about me as a pebble? There's also another pebble. Oh, come on! That looks like any old pebble. Oh, what? Sort of a generic-looking pebble. Oh, come on! That looks like any old pebble. Oh, what?

Sort of a generic-looking pebble. Oh, yeah, they're really nearly there. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Barj, I'm patching you in. Are you hearing this? What? And a giant pebble way up in the sky. What is this sound?

I don't like it. No, Barj, it's music. C-53 has discovered a society that communicates solely through song. Where's the music coming from? Uh. Hello. Ah, yes. Okay.

All right. Okay. Let's. Okay, everyone, get it out. Alright, this is just... It's fused, it's fused! I'm fused? Let's get over it. It's like a double fused!

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, hey! Come on, don't kick a fused thing while it's fused. C53, this is amazing. It's certainly an extremely unique planet. I don't think I've ever encountered anything quite like it. What happened here? Did you find out what happened to all of the rest of the people on the planet?

Well, if you want to hear the story about GEC, listen to a story told by me. I'm going to tell you a little bit of rap. And how rap works on this planet. Yeah. Here's the history. You heard it. Never be a mystery.

It's a history rap. History rap. It's the history rap. Oh, so he can rap. But he can't sing. Let me tell you something about the way that rap works on this planet. You don't have to think it up. You gotta just plan it.

And the only way that things rhyme is you say the word rap at the end of every line. And that's what things mean when they rhyme. Rap. A long time ago there were millions of people on this planet rap and you know someone came and killed everyone except me rap except for me and my dad who's in my body now rap what that's right and he plays piano on what was formerly a necktie. Rap.

That's right. That's the reveal. Wait, hold on. Hey, what's your name, man? I'm Jack. Yeah, AJ, as in Cheyenne's son of Jack. The reveal has been revealed. Wow, I guess we do know Jack.

And that's the history of rap. Wow, they really made rap so accessible. Rap and history. A perfect marriage. I mean, everybody's saying it's great, but I'm not sure it is. Like, I don't quite follow it. We can do it again for you. Do you want us to do the history of rap?

We can do it. Jack, Cheyenne, that to do the history of rap? We can do it. Jack Cheyenne, that's terrible what happened to your planet. I'm so sorry. Yes. If your planet was destroyed, how did you survive? Plek, you can't just ask them the question. That's not their language. You've got to sing.

But, like, Jack talks, so why can't I just talk to him? No, it's gross when he does it. I mean... Seeing Mr. Cheyenne will communicate, not Jack. See? It's easy. Oh, boy. Okay. Black needs to start at some point, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

I'm getting to it. Hey, just, Papa, ask them, like, what their deal is, why they're so gross-looking, right? Yeah. Ask them how, like, father and son can be that close, you know? Two men on a planet. The only ones left alive. Just a question. What's going on?

But how? How? alive just a question but how how did Cheyenne and Jack survive I got a hundred meat pies what? I threw a lot of them in the oven 99 meat pies 98 meat pies. What? I threw a lot of them in the oven. 99 meat pies.

98 meat pies into my hot oven. But the last two meat pies on me plate, they turned into one pie. Oh, okay. I think I understand now. What did I miss? What did I miss? What did I miss? You don't understand what he said?

Okay, let me try again. Let me try again. Here on GEC3 I can't believe my eyes Can you explain to me Did you guys used to be meat pies Cause I just, I feel like I almost got what you were saying But then I got confused

Please tell me, how did Cheyenne and Jack get fused? Oh, he's a dumb one. Okay, I just... This one's a dumb one. I can tell. You're absolutely right. Okay, AJ. Hustlers don't do anything.

Okay, all right. So he is pet. Oh, Papa's not. No, not really. I wouldn't say pet. No, that's not fair, but kind of a mascot. He does go on the rug sometimes. That happened once, and it was...

An accident. It was an accident. He was scared. He was scared. It was an accident. The gravity was off. I was very disoriented. He got surprised. Yes.

So, wait. How is all of this stuff just sprouting up when we sing? Yeah. How are things going back? Ah. Ha. Ah. Ma. It's harmony. Harmony's the air. I can talk. That's...'s the air. I can talk.

That's... Yeah, we know you can talk. We just don't like looking at you. Wait, Harmony? What do you mean? Well, let's see. That's Unison. Oh, no!

Some of the trees are going back! The trees are shrinking back into the ground! And that bird exploded. Okay, we's unison. Oh, no, some of the trees are going back. The trees are shrinking back into the ground. And that bird exploded. Okay, we'll try again. We'll just try again. Or maybe we just stop. Maybe no singing. We got to do it.

Oh. Whoa, like a bush and an animal appeared just now. This field is starting to grow. The harmony grows things on this planet? A long time ago, there were millions of my family on GEC. on GEC and then a powerful DET

came down made us sing the same no, no harmony, unison murdered my family except

my father. Ballad. Oh, you gotta say it with every genre. Great. Okay, yeah. Good, good. Sure. Wow.

How did they make you sing the same note? Like, they controlled you? Or they make you sing the same note? Like they controlled you or they asked you or what? You're asking Cheyenne to relive a genocide on this planet for the sake of getting the details right? It doesn't really matter. Same sheet music. Oh. See, it was a simple answer.

You know, honestly, I just feel like everyone's been asking the wrong questions today. Well, Dar, what question would you ask? Yeah, I have a question. It's for you, see. Do you need help learning to sing? I can help you. I can help you. Oh, I know.

I am trained in tactical singing. So I'll ask the question on your behalf, and then we won't have to look at Jack because he's gross. Yeah, that would be incredibly helpful actually what is it what's the question well i really want to ask c okay what why'd you have to go? Why'd you just have to go? Why'd you have to go?

And do it all alone. And do it all alone. I kind of thought, like, leave her at your home. Sorry, I was still kind of going. Yeah, sorry. Okay, what was the next one? I thought we were your home. We were your home. AJ's really making a meal with these runs.

This is great, man. AJ? Oh. I mean, he's short. I got my finger up and everything. What? Does that help? Does that help?

It helps a lot, actually. You hold one side of your helmet and you put your finger up and you're like... Wow, look at all the flowers! Birds! Wow, AJ, your voice sounds so cool when you sing. Oh, yeah, I've got standard military-grade pitch correction in the helmet. Oh, is that what that is? Okay. Yeah, I've got standard military-grade pitch correction in the helmet.

Oh, is that what that is? Okay. Listen, there's one thing I know about harmony. Sure, two is good, but more is better. We're going to have to build a chord. We're going to build a chord! All right, okay, AJ. We can put on a show.

We can do it here. We've got the costume. We don't need costumes, AJ. Oh, okay. AJ, that's... No, but what we need on a show. We could do it here. We've got the costumes. We don't need costumes, AJ. No, but what we need is a cord. If all the children in the world came together in a village and held the hands of each other, then we'd be holding the hands of each other

even though we don't have hands. We'd grow holding the hands of each other Even though we don't have hands We'd grow and grow What the jerk is he talking about? Yeah, AJ, their language is highly metaphorical. Yeah, what the jerk? He's agreeing with you. He's saying we should come together and make a chord. It would, you know, we'd be building something.

Yeah, okay, Let's do it. Oh. Oh. Oh. Oh. Are you seeing this? Whoa. Buildings. This is incredible. Power lines.

Satellite dishes. Infrastructure. A micro. Satellite dishes. Infrastructure. A microbrewery. Oh, wow. Hey, we get reception again. Nermin, hey, what's up, man? Oh, hey, Blackay crew. I was just wondering, did you find C-53?

We did. We rescued him. Nermin, I'm here. Get this, Nermin. This is nuts. Yeah, thanks for sending the crew. This is a planet where everyone just sings everything. Excuse me?

Yeah. Everything, we talk about everything we do, we have to sing it. Say that again. See you later, Nermin. No, wait. Let's do the mission again and I'll come along. Yeah, no, we gotta go. We do the mission again.

Bet Nermin wishes he was a little nicer to us earlier. Yeah. Yes, Mr. Robotman, there was a lot of friction because we were all pretty surprised that you did missions without us. Yeah, AJ. Should I say that to our friends? No, I don't.

I feel like at this point we've sort of covered that. Mr. Robotman! Be a bandit! AJ, AJ. You can't sustain that. Be a bandit! This is great, AJ. You can't sustain it. He abandoned us. This is great, man.

Where have you gone, Mr. Robot Man? He abandoned us. AJ, I never. I think that was my favorite one. Need more. You mean more singers? Bargy.

Bargy, weren't you in a bunch of musicals at some point? Musical hollows? Yeah, it was a dark period of my life. I don't like to talk about it or do anything that reminds me of it. Bargy, to be fair, you love it when we sing. I do. Bargy, to be fair, you love it when we sing.

I do. Bargy, we need that voice. We need that voice that's famous for the barging away. Oh, I love that musical. Bargy's going away. Bargy's going away. She's never coming back. She's going away. Bajie's going away. She's never coming back. She's going away.

She's Bajie. The sentient ship. A classic. Toot, toot, toot. A toot, toot, toot. Wow, that was pretty good, Bajie. That small ocean. Wow.

Look at that body of water. One more. Um, Dar, I think the only person not singing is, uh, you know. No, no, no, no, no, no. Come on, Dar. Yeah. Come on. No.

Listen, Dar, I know you're not captain anymore, and that I was sort of made leave an envoy almost arbitrarily, but you're still a member of this crew, and we need you. Arbitrarily? I mean, you know, I don't know why they would pick me over anyone else. I was in a toaster at the time.

Feels like there's a lot of motion. Gotta let it out. So you don't think you're hot stuff? Dar, I'm no better envoy than anyone else on this crew. This is a vamp. This is a classic vamp. I know. Dar, I still needed to be rescued. If the crew hadn't come here,

if you hadn't come here, I'd be all alone Wondering when I could come home Why did I leave When you were the ones I need Dar Plek And even AJ2 C-53 still needs his crew.

A collection of pebbles in the sun. And one pebble's clearly better than the other ones. No, they're all just good pebbles. One pebble sent on its own because it's so much better than the other ones. Don't you see? We're all just pebbles on the shore. No need for one to be considered any more

than the rest. But the others were set to make them feel better. He's right. He's got a point. We did come sort of as a consolation prize. All right, all right. I still need all of you.

I need all your help. One more. Dar, all we need is one note from you. Yeah, and not only can we save C-53, we can give Cheyenne and Jack their world back. So will you do it? And also, Bargy, will you also, I know you do kind of just a little. Yeah, a little ditty, but you got to get in on this chord.

What? Bargy, I think this genre is called a duet. Okay. A one, a two, a one, two, three, go. Bajie. Bajie. It's Bajie. Hold on, we gotta start over.

Sorry, we gotta get on the same page. Maybe we should still record? Wait, wait, wait. What, Cheyenne? Wait. Cheyenne. These two singing scripture. Look.

Two pebble. Largest pebble. And formerly in charge pebble the shapes chiseled into that stone tablet sort of look like Bargy and Dar Cheyenne where did you get that this how we rebuild

now with Bargy and Dar singing a jaunty duet? Not with a cord, Cheyenne? Cord tree. Cord animal. Cord grass. But cord no.

People. Duet for my dead children. No! Okay, just point of clarification. Do they come back or are they different people this time? Come back. Oh, okay. Okay.

Wow. Bargy, Dar, you have to take another run at that duet. Well, Dar, I think except for our misstep, we've been rehearsing for this all our lives. I could be like, you go first this time. Okay. Wow, this is the song that's going to bring all their people back. Dar.

Bajie. Dar. Bajie. Dar. Bajie and... Dar. It did it! Whoa! BUDGY and DAR! BUDGY and DAR! IT DID IT! There's millions of people!

Thank you so much! And your granddaddy. Okay, even his own grandchildren are kind of grossed out by him. This is the song of the children. The song of the children. stop by. Something's happening. Something's happening. Something's happening. Something's happening. Something's happening. Wait, something's happening to me. Oh, no. Something's happening. I'm transforming.

Diane, check. They're becoming weirder looking. Oh, Cheyenne, check. They're becoming weirder looking. Oh, no. Oh, I sort of thought they would separate and become their own people, but... Yeah, now they're just even more. Is that what was supposed to happen? Uh, we are into final form. Piano ball.

Oh, yeah, it's's a big ball of keys Wow and it plays by rolling on the ground Yeah We've been stuck in a state of arrested development All these many years Our final form Not allowed to us Piano ball

So piano ball is sort of ideal Is anybody else weirded out by the fact that it has teeth And like hair Yeah And sustain pedal Oh yeah You want to touch the sustain pedal You can touch the sustain pedal

Okay alright Pretty good Wait sorry what is a piano ball does anyone know what a piano ball is do you really need more singing what walks in the morning with four legs what walks with two legs in the afternoon. What begins the end and ends the universe. I think it's a metaphor.

Piano. Piano. Oh, they can harmonize with each other now. Whoa, so much stuff is growing right now. Rolling around, rolling around. Rolling in the deep. Rolling in the deep. There's water. Yeah, there's water now.

And now there's fish coming out. Wow. Thank you, 53rd C. Thank you, Cheyenne, son of Jack. And Jack, father of Cheyenne. Do you have a new name now that you're a piano ball, or... No. Still, you lose our identities, C-53.

Yeah, I don't know. Culturally, it might be different. Thank you all. Thank you for letting us be a part of this. The song brings us together. Song brings us together. We wave from side to side as the song brings us together. So much has been wrong so bad for so long

apart but together because the song brings us together the song brings us together we wave from side to side cause the song brings us together.

Together. Because the song brings us together. Together. The song brings us together. Together. The song brings us together. It brings us all together. Wow.

Perhaps one day we see you for a reprise. Oh, maybe. What's that? It's like you know When they repeat the song Something like Two pebbles That's it yeah Two pebbles They become one pebble

Gross piano balls Perfect piano balls Great son of gravels How did I not get a rap? That's the history That's the history of rap Perfect piano It's sort of gross How did I not get it right That's the history of rap Oh wow The history of rap It's two couples

But it's now one couple Three sunsets Insects on a leaf Wait what is that Strangers at the barricade Wait, what? Do not be afraid! Yeah, sometimes with the priests, they try to put too much stuff in. Yeah, sometimes there's too many voices. Yeah, it kind of gets the killer this more

end of act one yeah No, no, my fingers here, bigger fingers. What? No, I have even bigger fingers than that. You call those big? Look at these fingers. Juntawa, Juntawa. Oh, yes, they have all sizes and within reason, of course.

Juntawa, Juntawa. Hee hee hee hee. Do whatever you want with them. It's none of my business. I'm going to go and get my little sister. Oh, I'm going to go and get my little sister. I'm going to go and get my little sister. I'm going to go and get my little sister.

I'm going to go and get my little sister. I'm going to go and get my little sister. I'm going to go and get my little sister. I'm going to go and get my little sister. I'm going to go and get my little sister. I'm going to go and get my little sister. Juntawa? Oh, yes, we have all sizes, and within reason, of course. Juntawa. Juntawa. Hee hee hee hee! Do whatever you want with them! It's none of my business. Juntawa. Oh, no, no, no, the fingers won't do that. If that's what you're looking for, maybe you should check out Dipsy. Yes, Dipsy.

Juntawa? No, it's not any kind of finger. No, no. Dipsy's an audio app full of short, sexy stories. They release new content every week, so there's always more to explore. Chantala? Indeed. Everyone needs an escape, but those can be hard to come by.

Chantala. Enter Dipsy. gay, but those can be hard to come by. Chantawa. Enter Dipsy. Let yourself get lost in a world where pleasure is the only priority. You know, I myself have been feeling burnt out by the relentless

grind of Hocking's seven digits. Boy, I could use some relaxation. Well, Dipsy also has wellness sessions, sensual bedtime stories, and soundscapes to help you relax before you drift off. Chantawa. Plus, Dipsy's

offering an extended 30-day free trial when you go to dipsystories.com slash zix. That's 30 days of full access for free when you go to dipsystories.com slash Chantawa.

Yes, Ziggs. Let's be just yes, two thumbs up to that big thumbs. Oh, no,

no, no, I have bigger thumbs than that. Oh, not bigger than these. Oh, dipsystories.com

slash Ziggs. Chantawa. Crew, I have to say, I really do appreciate you coming to rescue me on GEC3. Of course. I really did need all of you. And so did they. We're glad to have you back, C-53.

And if I'm not mistaken, sounds like that's a call for you. Yeah. No. It's a call for all of us. From missions operations, missions assignments, and missions... I think it's a call for me. It's probably an interview. No, it's Nermin, RJ, so it's probably for... No, but I've engaged a lot of calls. Very stupid.

Hey, Nermin. Hey, crew, I've got my road case packed. I've got two keyboards. I've got a backup microphone. I've got just a... Yeah, the missions... We're actually on our way back. We're actually on our way back.

Check out this panel how it changes my voice. Oh, wait, wait, wait. Am I talking like this? This feels crazy. Yeah, N missions. We're actually on our way back. Wait, wait, wait. Am I talking like this? Yeah, Nermit. Nermit, Nermit, don't. Nermit, you kind of, I'm sorry to say it, but you kind of missed the moment. Yeah, and I think we need to hang up on you now. Yeah, that's true.

All of us at once. Everybody finger on the button. As a crew. Oh, when we sing, we sing as a crew. Hey, are you guys done? Huh? I'm in the middle of an interview. Oh.

Anyway, stop the applause. Where's my ship hole? I'll tell you. Oh, you're gonna tell them? Oh. Get your pens ready. I'm about to describe it in deep detail. Ha ha ha ha ha! All right. So what are we doing here?

Oh, are we going to buy some big fingers? Because honestly, I'm... No, no, no, Dada. All you must do now is act as the rear legs in this palatial suit. I shall do the rest. So remember, when I step with my left leg, you step with your right. Ready? Let's go. Left leg, yes.

Good. Right leg. Good, good. Are you a dancer or something? You're nailing this. Wait, that's Plex Dexter. The guy I was telling you about who shot me. I am gonna... Patience, Star. Patience.

It is not him we are after. But if the plan is to destroy these guys, they're all right there. It just... It doesn't work that way, okay? Wait for it. Wait for it. Now. Let's start.

I'm under its foot. Oh, hey, listen. Could you just lift up your foot real quick? Come on. What the... Hermit, just hail. Oh, hey, listen. Could you just lift up your foot real quick? What the... Hermit, your tail! Oh, you tore my tail off. Oh, man, he got away. Did he?

Did he? Quickly, Dar, reach outside of the suit and burrow in the severed appendage. The tail? Okay. That tail shall wag the galaxy. Get in on this, doll. It's fun to laugh.

The wax side. The Waxide. This is Sea Ride IT5. Credits and attributions joined. Commencing outro protocol. Plank Dexeter was played by Alden Ford. Lead Envoy C-53, The Big Finger Seller, and Stafai were played by Jeremy Benn. Dar and Dar were played by Ali Kokesh. Bargy the Ship and The Bigger Finger Seller were played by Mujan Zolfagari.

Nermit Bundeloy was played by Seth Lind. EJ and Fondo Parquad were played by Winston Null. Cheyenne, son of Jack, was played by special guest Chris Grace. Chris is an actor and comedian in Los Angeles. He played Jerry on Superstore and is in the final season of Atypical on Netflix. Jack was played by special guest Eric Gerson, who also improvised the piano performances throughout the episode. Eric is a composer, pianist, and comedian who has composed music for Comedy Central,

True TV, TBS, and Improv Everywhere. He is an associate music director for Story Pirates and the creator and musical director for the musical improv team Rumpelteaser, which is once again performing live shows in NYC. Cora Balevor was played by Brenna Lee Mulligan. This episode was edited by Seth Lind. Sound design, mix, and music production and instrumentation by Shane O'Connell. Theme music composed by Brendan Ryan and performed by famous Macedonian Symphonic Orchestra. Orchestra mixing

by Danny Keith Taylor. Opening call narration by Jeremy Crutchley. Ship design for the Bargerian Jay by Eric Gois. Audio hosting by Simplecast. Mission to Zix is a proud member of the Max1Bun Network. Since the dawn of time, screenwriters have taken months

to craft their stories. But now, three Hollywood professionals shall attempt the impossible. Break a story in one hour. That's right. Here on Story Break, I, Freddie Wong,

Matt Arnold, and Will Campos, the creators behind award-winning shows like Video Game High School, have one hour to turn a humble idea into an awesome movie. Now, an awesome movie starts with an awesome title. I chose The Billionaire's Marriage Valley.

Mine was Christmas Pregnant Paradise. Okay, next we need a protagonist. So I've heard Wario best described as Libertarian Mario. And of course, every great movie needs a stellar pitch. In order to get to heaven, sometimes you've got to raise a little hell. Ha ha, that's the tagline!

Check out Story Break every week on MaximumFun.org or wherever you get your podcasts. Hey, I'm Jordan Morris, creator of the MaxFun scripted sci-fi comedy podcast, Bubble. We just released a special episode of bubble to celebrate the launch of our new graphic novel at sf sketch fest in 2019 we recorded a live show with allison becker eliza skitter mike mitchell christella alonzo and special guests jean gray jonathan colton jesse thorne nick weiger and a bunch of other cool folks we suspect he'll show signs of mutation when in a state of excitement now annie matched with him on tinder so she's going to act as the honeypot. I do enjoy being called a honeypot.

Hey, you know what's better than honey? Gravy. Oh, yeah. Can I be the gravy sack? Out now on MaximumFun.org and wherever you get podcasts. And pick up the graphic novel at your local bookstore today. MaximumFun.org Comedy and culture.

Artist owned. Audience supported. We both sleep as I cradle you. Cats. I can't stay awake. The cat is in the silver spoon. And the cradle is the moon. Good luck putting this together.

Yeah, this is editing itself. It's beautiful.