Monday Morning Podcast - Introducing: Anything Better? Podcast with Bill Burr & Paul Virzi
Episode Date: February 3, 2021Is there anything better? Listen in as Bill and Paul talk about things like punching plates of marinara sauce, investing in family life, sports, and poking holes in our political circus tent. Sit back... and enjoy being a part of the inner circle with a cigar, cynical wisecracks, and some relatable anecdotes. Subscribe! https://bit.ly/AnythingBetterPodcast
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Ikea, tip of the week.
Do you like to get a gift?
You can count on us.
Because until April 15th, Ikea family members get a free children's menu
at the purchase of a warm meal for adults.
Oh, you remember exact-
Dude, exactly right I do.
I keep playing that over my head what I should have said to that guy.
But I was on my best behavior.
What an asshole.
My world, Poland is still under communist f*****g control.
So I'm nervous to run my yapp over there.
I got like this 2 of them I go, yeah, what is- remember he was a dick to me.
So I go, yeah, what is good?
He goes, everything is good.
Like he said everything is good as if I was like saying it wasn't.
I was just-
What the f*****g were we doing?
I remember that-
It was a chocolate shop.
Yeah, it was in the thing and we couldn't find any place to f*****g eat.
Yeah.
That's right.
So we got those f*****g hot chocolates.
It was a-
Yeah, it was a f*****g snowing out.
Yeah, I remember that.
And I was trying to find a Polish flag to add to my collection,
which I could get over here, but I wanted to get it there.
That was the only one I couldn't get.
It was a little, yeah, coffee cafe with a little chocolate shop in the hotel.
And the guy was a f*****g and then to throw it at you one last time,
he just goes, oh, you like something sweet, dude?
That bugged you the rest of the trip.
You were just going like, I would see you-
No, because I hate when people think that you don't know that they're making fun of you.
That's what annoys the s**t out of me.
And he was coming at us because we were Americans.
That happened one time when I was in Denmark and this cab driver said,
blah, blah, blah, blah.
He goes, yeah, because you're Americans.
It's so stupid.
He literally said that to me.
And I stayed in the cab.
I go, really?
And you're driving a f*****g cab and you're a smart guy?
You f*****g eight foot dope?
What do you weigh?
140 f*****g pounds?
And he was going like, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey.
I just sat there and just f*****g verbally abused him for like 50 seconds.
It's one of my favorite overseas moments was verbally abusing that guy.
My wife was pulling me out of that.
I wouldn't get out of the cab.
Dude, that is one of the most-
So this is how you treat guests when they come to their country?
Oh.
What the f***** did you do that you're driving a f*****g cab?
Dude.
What, you went back to school?
That's fantastic that you stayed there.
You f*****g cunt?
I love how you're still getting mad.
No, I f*****g hate-
Dude, I-
Both those guys.
I f*****g drop them in the Baltic Sea.
That's nearby.