Morbid - Episode 35: Faeries Part 2

Episode Date: January 3, 2019

We are back with some more spritely hell raisers in our second installment of Faeries. Don't swear, don't swim and definitely don't bring one to a proper grave. These little devils are not here to grant wishes....unless your wish is to be maimed, murdered or eaten. See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Whoa! Happy New Year! It's officially a brand new year. It's a brand new day. Did you just mesh two things together? I think I did. Totally. It sounded like a Latin, a whole new world. It's a beautiful day.

That's what I was doing. Yeah, but I made it up. But you put it in the tune of a whole new world. Yeah, no, it's exactly what I did. Okay, we are one. We can't talk about ourselves this episode at all though. Did you read the review where it said that we talk about ourselves too much? Oh, no, I didn't read that one. I said I just laughed at it actually because it literally I think they read this one star and wrote really bad And then their description was these two girls just talk about themselves the whole time and think that they have Woody Banscher,

but they're not funny. Oh, shit. And I was just like, oh, who knew? Sorry for not finding you. Eat my butts. Eat my butt. You know what the best thing is to do whenever I find a one star review that's like nasty like that.

Like no, it's just like you talk about yourself and I eat you and you're not funny. I just go and look at my favorite podcasts, one star reviews and I'm like, we're okay. Yeah, I just like laugh at most of them unless they're like actually hurtful, that one wasn't. Yeah, like the one that called us thoughts, I wasn't really a big fan of. No. So yeah, that's a good, well we won't talk about ourselves. Let's stop talking about ourselves.

Let's talk about our Patreons. Because they're the best. Book yeah. Alright, so in the window latching cover this week, we have Nadia Seabunberger. That is an amazing name. I am so sorry if I said your name wrong and I really hope I didn't because I practiced. It's true she did.

How to not say your name wrong. And it's a great name. Yeah, your first name is really cool. Like Nadia? Nadia. I just think that sounds nice It just sounds beautiful. It feels good. It does to say it has good mouth feel and thank you very much Nadia. Thank you Nadia Next up is E Lisa E Lisa I wanted to say something really witty there. You's a beast of

E Lisa is a beast. Elisa is a beasta. Or the teetza. Thank you so much, Elisa. Get it. Elisa. Next up we have Ann Ferguson. Ann. I love the last name Ferguson.

That is a great last name. Like, oh. That's a great, that in fact one of my friends from high school used to call each other. I don't know where this came from, but she called me Ferguson and I called her Cornelius, and I don't really know why. We call Annie's dog, Terd Ferguson, because that's from SNL. Yep. Yep, it is. Terd Ferguson.

So that holds a special place in both our hearts. So thanks, Anne. Yeah, thank you, Anne. Also, okay, so we have two carons, and they both spell their name K-A-R-Y-N, which I've never seen before. That's intriguing. And I think it's so pretty. So first Karen is Karen Watten. Thank you Karen Watten. And fucking awesome when you spell your name. I know, that's rad.

And the other one is Karen Washington. Thank you Karen Watten. They're both Karen W. I just fucking realized that. This is weird. It's like... Oh. Kismet.

Eba But. Next up is Jen Pothering. This is weird. Ooh, it's like... Ooh, Kismet. Eva Butt. Next up is Jen Pothering. Jen Pothering. You are not bothering us. Jen Pothering. No way. You are Pothering us, which is positive. Fuck yeah.

Literation. In the evil onion's category, we have solo James Nassau. James Nassau, thank you James. Or Nassau. Or Nassau. I think it's Nassau. James Nassau, thank you James. Or Nassau. Or Nassau. I think it's Nassau. Nassau, let us know. And then we have... Right, the way, thank you James. Oh my gosh, yes, thank you so much. And then in the jagged little bitch category, we have Falsian. Is that how I say that? Falsian? Falsian. Falsian.

Or Falsian. That's also a really cool name. Wicked cool name. And a Madonna. Thank you so much Falsian. Thank you. You guys are the best. You guys are the best. You guys are starting off 2019 right? We're the bang. Yeah, yeah, bang, bang. And we got, and I'm so excited to give you all kinds of things. Here you go. Take it. And again, that PO box is happening. It's happening. We've got a list, like we've made our resolutions for 2019. It's like a long school. Yeah, most of them include you guys. Everyone listening right now, most of our resolutions are based on you.

So know that you're gonna be reaping the benefits. We should make a post and have everybody comment what their resolution is. That's fun. If you made one. Yeah. Minus to complain less. Oh, that's a good one. I complain so much.

Like, Analana. Analana. That's a good one. Analana. It's a attainable. Yeah. It's good to have an attainable resolution. And it makes you accountable for yourself.

It really does. And I see my resolution is to declutter my life. Just get rid of shit. And I also wanna finish my book that you're writing. Yes, I wanna finish that. Let's do it. I also wanna start going to the gym cause I've been getting hefty.

See, I'm not even gonna wanna go to the gym. I think I just wanna like just give myself time during the day to do like a yoga practice or something or do something. I'm not even gonna say I'm gonna go to the gym because I'm not going to. Well, I paid for a gym membership like a month ago and I haven't gone once. I paid for one all last year and I did not go once. Oh, I'm so glad. Yeah, you know what though?

So don't worry, we're talking about ourselves. We are shit. Fuck! Don't give us a one-star review. So, Ferries Part 2 bitches with your girl ass. We have finally here. Coming at you hot. Bring you back to the land of Ferries. I just felt like Sasha from Urban Legends. You kind of sounded like a lot of my own radio show. That's another thing. We're

gonna have to book another episode. To another bonus. Oh yeah, we're definitely gonna do that. So everybody make sure that happens because we definitely want to do a live show But we need to do another bonus episode soon. Yeah, and I think we want to do like house of a thousand corpses We have to do it so that I stop fucking hearing exactly house of a thousand corp Slepby watch it so that I stop you tell me that I need to watch it. We'll watch it I love you on one of our sleep overnight. We'll watch it. I love you. On one of our sleep overnight we'll watch it. Sleepover. Sleepover. Sleepover. Okay, this is a mini episode, so let's shut the fuck up. We're getting right into it. So, banshee's are my first fairy. I love banshee's. Yeah, they scream in.

Yeah. They be loud. They be loud. So, according to Irish legend, banshee's are fairies. That scream really fucking loudly. And I would say that's moderately obnoxious, to be honest I'm really scared of them so I never said that. Yeah they're terrifying. Yeah don't tell them I said that. Don't tell those banshee's. It's said that if you hear the scream of a banshee you sir are about to die. Ooh.

Yeah RIP. Man. That's bad news all around. It really is. According to an article that I read on Celticweddingrinks.org, which had nothing to do with wedding rings. But whatever. So I was confused, but it had a lot of impact.

But we'll go with it. Banshee's could appear in the form of a really beautiful woman wearing a long draping dress. Always. A pale woman. You'll see. With long silver hair, excuse me, a long silver dress to match her silver hair.

Ooh. A headless woman holding a blood-filled bowl. Those are two very different things. Homegirl is naked from the waist up. Oh, so... Rock and roll. So this tits out? Rock and roll.

Holding a head in the bowl naked from the waist up. That's the most metal shit I've ever heard. That's like five-figure death punch. That's what that is. That's a great album cover. And I bet it's fairies. Excuse me, Ben, she's listened to five-figure death punch because why wouldn't they? Of course they would. Yes. Because they hold their heads in bowls. Ten hundred percent. They get from boys up. Yeah. So are they still screaming if the head isn't so as a bowl, the head bowl, the bowl head, just screaming? I think it's up to interpretation. Well, or is the neck whole screaming

in so many ways that's good enough? Well, yeah, because technically you're vocal cord. What if both are screaming? Oh, like I'm just picturing a neck screaming. That's not okay. That's not it, right? Also, she could appear as an old woman with scary ass red eyes wearing a dream dress, because Mary Christmas.

Oh, a green dress. I think you think you said dream dress. I might not Christmas. Oh, a green dress. I think you said Dreen dress. I might not. I meant to say green dress either way. And she has white hair too, or silver. And then the last way they can appear is as an old woman dressed in all black. Hello future us.

I was just gonna say, with long gray hair and to veil covering her face. All right. So more of the story is that if you see an old scary woman with a dress, you're fucked. And if you see a pretty woman with long light hair, you're extra fucked. Yes. And if you see a woman with her tits out holding a bowl with her head in it, that's screaming at you. Rock and roll bitch.

I mean, just... That's what you do. That's what happens. That's what happens. That's just what happens. Rock and roll the fuck out of there. And voluntarily, that's what you do. That's what happens. That's what happens. Rock and roll the fuck out of there. Voluntarily, that's what happens. So the origin of the banshee comes from women called keyners who used to sing sad songs to express their grief over someone's death.

But they would take alcohol as payment for their singing, and that was considered sinful. Because they're Irish. But I would do that too. So the punishment for their sin is that they were doomed to become banshees. Oh wow. Which I don't know who decides that. I mean, I- There must be some- some really square dude that's deciding like dick.

Or just like some like mad ass lady that got cheated on I feel. Yeah, some scorned woman. Yeah, scorned lady. Yeah. But aside note, there are some chill banshees that just like sing a haunting song about how much they love a family member and how they're like concerned about them. But typically whoever hears that song ends up dead after a few days of hearing the singing. Well, that's kind of a bummer.

Yeah. Like at first you're like, this is chill. Yeah. And then it bummer. Yeah, like at first you're like, this is chill. Yeah, and then it gets rough Yeah, so like some like one of your family members passes away and then you start to hear them singing like and you're like, well shit You're probably about to die man, so that's rough rock and roll for the next few days. Yeah, just live it up, man So yeah Some Irish myths say that banshee's are the ghosts of young girls who had suffered brutal death Deaths and they appear to family members to warn them that their violent death will too come soon. God, I don't like want to

know this stuff. I feel like you don't need to tell me. It's cool. I don't go to like tarot card readers and be like, tell me what I'm going to die. Yeah, I don't want that shit. Well I mean like the good news is that if you see a banshee it's not like you're going to die right then and there, but the bad news is that like you're going toanshee, it's not like you're gonna die right then and there, but the bad news is that like you're gonna die at some point, shortly after that. Oh, that's the thing. It's like, you know, it's like, it's soon. So like, R-I-P.

So that wouldn't be cool. But then again, it would also allow you to live it up for a little while. Now, you just don't even know how long though. I know. Because then it's like 10 years down the line, you're still like partying and at that point, you probably just killed yourself from that partying.

So yeah, that is a banshee's. Banshee's. Next up is Uttbirds. Ooh, I've heard of these. Yeah, they're also known as My Rings. Or My Rings. My Rings. So this fairy comes from Scandinavia.

Scandinavia, which where Scandinavia? You know. You know, we're Scandinavia. I'm not saying do you know. Someone write in until I'm Scandinavia? You know. You know, we're Scandinavia. I'm saying do you know? Someone write in until Ashok Scandinavia is. Thank you. It's said to be the spirit of a child who was abandoned by its parents, either couldn't take care of it or didn't want it.

Well that's just like gnarly, I don't like that. Yeah, like if you don't want a kid, don't have one. Yeah, that's, I mean that's a really good first step. Yeah. To not- I will say back then, like, probably not much for the control of the world, but like- You could just throw like a new variant in there. Maybe try, like, some other methods. Yeah, like, maybe just don't, you know. You know. Don't-

So we're not gonna pay a picture. Don't- don't do it. Yeah, just keep buying. Don't do it, guys. I've never heard that before, spray- You haven't? No. Fuck that paying a picture. Don't do it. Yeah, I keep buying. Don't do it, guys. I've never heard that before, spray-priced. No. Fuck that. I mean, nobody should do it. That's not effective.

But the word upbird means that which is outside. So because these children were like pretty much just left to die and they weren't cared about. So sad. Yeah. So they were left without like any kind of burial or anything like that. Oh, man. So obviously they came back super pissed about that.

And they came back in the form of ghost like fairies. I mean, that's pretty rad. So normally they, they saw a really shitty life. I mean, yeah, like mine is welcome back as a hateful fairy. I feel like that's just like a ghost though. This one is just kind of like a ghost. I would want to be known. Like if I had like a really shitty

life and death like that, I'd be like, I'm coming back as a vengeful fairy. Yeah. I feel like you just, that's the box you check. Yeah. When you're like checking into heaven or you're like, revengeful fairy in the afterlife, like just walking about, I'd be like,

ghost, banching, hateful fairy, you know what I mean? Chick, hateful fairy, newtalk. Hateful fairy, all the way. Yeah. So they typically reside in the woods or in super remote areas, because that's pretty much just like where they were left to die. Oh my god. So if a passerby is...

Oh, that's what it is. It really is. So like somebody like passing by, like maybe like on a hike or something in the woods, um, the upper is their first mistake. Yeah, the don't go on the woods. Like don't do it. That's what my favorite murder taught us. Yeah, they got a good stay out of the woods.

But if they're like hiking or something, which like don't do that, um, the upper is we'll jump onto the person's back and demand. This is sad though, demand to be taken to a proper grave. Oh, that's all they want. Oh my god. Which I you imagine that for one second. Don't jump on my back cuz like yo you scared me. Some hateful fairy jumping on your back being like take me to a fucking proper grave. And I feel like they say it like that. Dig me to a grave. That's exactly the way they say it. Dig me right now. Dig me right now. That's how they say it. They have crazy weird accents that are on identifyable.

Yeah, I don't know what they are because I don't know where Scandinavia is. So, either way, I'd be like, I don't know where one is. Yeah, so obviously if you're fucking in the woods and somebody jumps on you, you're gonna do it, they say. For sure. So, I don't know, maybe that's just me. But, I am, I'm with you. If the person complies and takes them to the grave, they get heavier and heavier as they're like on the journey because they're on the person's back.

So people say this happens because the closer to the grave they get, the more human they become. I'm terrified, right? It's fucked up. Look, this whole thing is messing with my brain. And then some people say that as the victim of an upward travels with the upward on their back, it slowly sucks the life out of them, causing them to become weak and sink into the ground, which then becomes

the up bird's grave. Hate that. Yeah. Hate that. Moral of this story. That's a whole mountain of nope. Just don't abandon your kids. Yeah, don't do it. We won't have a bird's if you don't abandon your kids. Do it. Don't do it. Do it. Don't. So yeah, holy shit. That one is heavy. That was just kidding.

Literally, you're being used to feeling this literally heavy. Well, because you have kids. That's just like, yeah, that's intense. Take me to a grave. Take me to a grave. Next up, Burb Arokas. Ooh, don't know.

Those sound fun. These are Fer Burbarokas. Ooh, don't know, those sound fun. These are Ferries Slash Ogres, Lovyn Shreddy. Love it already. Don't get. Don't get. They're super chill and really just enjoy changing in size and eating humans alive.

A snack. So I don't really see the problem. All right, I think they sound great. These are actually like a really quick one. They originated in a in a pio which is located in the Philippines. Alright. And I'd not sure if I'm saying that properly, but you know guys, I fucking try. We give it our best. So the people in a pio believe that burbro gaz will lay in a body of water and suck up all the water so that fish are just like flappin' around everywhere. Also, I don't know how the person just like traveling doesn't notice that there's like this giant fucking thing full of water.

This is huge ogre, this is like- Just like, you know like the puffer fish thing? Yes! Like they just look like that, but times 60 million. Oh my damn. So the people get excited that all these like good for eating and selling fish are just lying all about? I mean that's not what I would think immediately. So the town people come fucking running,

like it's a pot of gold. Yeah, this is fine. And that's when the Berberoka drowns them by letting all the water come back out. So he's just like, boom. Or he's just like, boom.

Like that. And then they drown. This is actually really funny. And then, I'm sad people are drowning in shit. But if you picture it, it's really funny, but like, all of a sudden, it's fucked. But so, after they drown, the burbroke swallows them whole. So they die and then they get swallowed whole.

Yeah. Yay! Wow, burbroke. And I do the damn thing. So I guess they're kind of similar, I read to the Greek legend of the Nayed Nayad, which is a female spirit who also just chills in the water and fucks with people. Cool.

This is a lot of really scary water fairies. Yeah, I only found one thing about how to like, ward them off. And it said the same thing everywhere. It had no backstory to why this works. It's going to be something ward them off. And it said the same thing everywhere. It had no backstory to why this works. It's gonna be something weird to spark. They're afraid of crabs. I mean, same. So that's the only way to defeat them because they don't fucks with crabs. They do not fucks with crabs. Which like me either. I was gonna say, I don't either. So that's something we have in common.

And I feel like when you have common ground, yeah, you can get along Okay, I don't know if I dreamt this as a little kid But I swear I remember it so vividly that it had to have happened I was on the beach with my mom and her friend mom like if you're listening Hitting me out and all the sudden the tide like went out and like 50 million fucking crabs started coming up onto the beach. Maybe. The beach was- That is no longer having crabs every way. Like that's definitely possible.

And I don't know if I dreamt that or if it really fucking happened. Either way, that's terrible. And I gotta know. Because I have random flashbacks. You're not gonna go out and know. I gotta know. Do you ever have those things where like you're like- Was that real?

Did that happen? Or like I know this isn't real, but I had this weird like it must have been a dream when I was little that we went on the front lawn like me and my dad and we looked up and all the planets were like completely visible. Yeah that's a cute thing didn't happen, but I remember it being so vivid that I was like, why is that like sticking in my brain and why is it so vivid? Yeah. Like I can still see it. I can see it exactly how I saw it in the vein. Remember when the shed was in the backyard? Yeah. I like always had memories of like these two scary cartoon character guys making me go into the shed and like they were really mean.

I literally hate that. Isn't that so scary? I hate that. Yeah. And like I was always like really afraid of them. I'm really glad that shed is gone. But like I had to go in the shed. That's awful.

It's not really scary. I'm upset about it. And then one time this woman just like floated out of the coffee table and was like screaming at me. And one of my, I don't know if it happened. And I think it was a dream. Okay, that would kind of love. She was like,

The world's crazy. And then I used to, I'm really going off on a tangent. So don't edit this out. No, don't. It's like crazy. I need to know if I'm really going off on a tangent, so don't let it this out. No, don't, it's like crazy. I need to know if I'm crazy. Is any therapist listening?

There used to be somebody under your dresser that would like yell at me. And they would yell at you? Like if I would get close to the dresser, they'd be like, Good on her! Good on the dresser! Good on her! Oh god! Yeah, that just gave me the heaps, I hate it.

And one time this actually happened, I saw a ghost in our room. Oh yeah, I remember you telling me that. Yeah, that just gave me the heaps. I hate it. And one time I this actually happened. I saw a ghost in our room. Oh, yeah, I remember you telling me that. Yeah. Yeah. But I got to continue with the fairies. I'll save that story for an other day. Yeah. Because I'm still reeling from the dresser thing. I don't even know how I got onto that tangent. I don't either. All that should happen. It wasn't a dream. I loved it. Definitely not the crabs. I think that really just happened. The crabs, I think, happened. Yeah. Planets didn't. Yeah. Another cool thing about Berberokas is that the water created from their stomachs will allow whoever drinks it to see the future. Oh shit.

Supposedly. But it's like backwash times 1000. And it probably has like some molecules of first time people in it. Yeah. Yeah, that's some heebies. I mean, if you want to see the future, you got to put in the work. It's true. You can't just get that shit.

Next is the Calacantisario. Wow. Also known as the chicken riders. I like that. Yeah, way better. So it sounds goofy, but if you actually stop to think about it, like a little like tiny fairy just running around under a chicken or over a chicken, that's scary.

I think it's still funny. I don't really like chickens. Or roosters. I have a weird fear of roosters. Because I remember reading that Juni B. Jones book. I'm really going off on tangents here. Are you kidding? I could go out.

But I remember reading that book. And Juni B. Jones said that a rooster could peck you into a nub. Whoa. Yeah, that's stayed with me. I don'tub. Whoa. Yeah, that stayed with me. I don't fuck with that. Yeah, so I've always been a friend of roosters. But anyway, these fairies originate from Greece and Italy. And for most of the year, they live underground.

But during the 12 days of Christmas, which is December 25th through January 6th, they hang out on Earth. So they're still chilling right now. Oh, shit. So during the ancient Greek holiday, sakeia? Sakeia? Sounds good. Yeah. It is said that Zeus defeated the Titans in Kronos, but it is also rumored that while all of that was happening, the Kalakantazario went around destroying the city for 12 days and stealing the souls of newborn babies. Same. I can actually picture you doing that, so I'm alarmed.

born babies. Same. I can actually picture you doing that, so I'm alarmed. So yeah, like legit baby, so little stamp. It's also rumored that any baby born during the 12 days on which the calic cantazori roamed the earth, that they'd be in great danger of actually transforming into a calic cantozoid. Oh, shit! I was born in that time. I know, I think I wrote something about that. I am them. Maybe I didn't. But to protect the babies, parents would cover them in bags filled with garlic. Yeah. That's where we look.

That's where we look, garlic so much. I mean, garlic is good. And they would burn logs, which the mini naked fairies didn't enjoy the fumes of. Oh, also they're naked. Did I not mention that? No. Yeah, they're naked. So they just tied a little naked fairies riding on chickens. That's funny. I'll get into kind of what they're naked. I not mention that. Yeah, they're naked. So this is tiny little naked fairies riding on chickens.

That's funny. I'll get into kind of what they look like. Now, right now, things are great. Okay, so as for appearance, they don't really fall under like the tinkerbell fairy category. No, most of these do. People have conflicting ideas and descriptions of them. So some people say that they have hairy bodies

with horse legs or boar tusks. But then some people think that they have hairy bodies with horse legs or bortusks. But then some people think that they're wicked tiny and like human-like, but they smell really bad. And it's just stanky. They have like a serious case of B.O. And popular relief is that they are small black creatures that are mostly human looking other than their long black tails. So like some people say that they're kind of like little like devils but they're all black and people refer to them as little black devils. Also, they're blind. Oh yeah. And they have

lisp. I'm literally obsessed with these. Yeah, I think these sounds like pretty rough. They sound amazing. So along with the many ideas of their appearance, people also have like tons of different methods of protection against them. So, along with the many ideas of their appearance, people also have like tons of different methods of protection against them. So, they say that you can leave a fire burning in your fireplace all night, which I tend out of tend to not recognize. I was just gonna say that will bring all kinds

of other bad things out there. Really big issues. But the idea is that they can't break into your house the way that like Sanadus, like through the journey. And you can also throw stinky ass shoes into the fire and hope that the smell keeps them away. But honestly, if my shoes haven't scared Annie away at the point, they definitely not do a scare to your father.

So yeah, that's pretty much them. I love the chicken right now. They run around naked and blind on chickens stealing the souls of newborn babies. And just causing havoc. And if you don't want to listen to them list and steal your newborn baby soul, then you should burn some garlic.

And maybe not light a fire for like a whole long day, but I love the thing on the list. You're like, I'm going to steal your soul of her new baby. I'm going to steal your soul of your new baby! My chicken. I can't see you. I can't see you. I can't see you. Next is the Bannock.

So the Bannock fairies originate from Slavic mythology. And like anyone else, he enjoys a spa day. So Bannock is just like one single dude. Who doesn't? He typically hangs out in steams. Oh, so he's not like a community of Bannock's? It's like one Bannock. A Bannock.

The Bannock. Yes, the Bannock. So he hangs out Bannock. A Bannock. The Bannock. Yes, the Bannock. So, he hangs out in steam rooms, changing rooms, and bath houses. Okay. They're always male. So it's always just like one. Oh, okay.

Like, they travel by themselves. Wherever they are, they're just one. So it's like one, um, no. Okay. Or like, troll. Like, a troll under a bridge. Yeah, I've got a troll. It just appears.

Yeah. And they're always male and described as an old man with long white hair and a long white beard. That's just sounds kind of like Santa. Wimsycle? Yeah. They're very clean looking and clean smelling and pretty human-like. I kind of love it already. Except their hands are covered in hair and their nails are claws.

I mean, I can't have everything, I guess. You really can't. You can't have it all. He doesn't give it with both hands, so. Oh, no, he does, though. So they're shtick, like you were saying. There's your episode one. Is that they're just like horny little people? That's amazing.

That they dig spying on women while they bathe. And they see your home as like their home. Oh, I don't love that. No. And because of this, they have really high standards of how you're supposed to act in their home. Oh, shit. So they despise anything religious, such as crosses or like any holy symbol. Okay. You must leave the third bath for them. So like in the old days, like one person would take a bath and no one can take the third bath.

Which you don't understand how that works because doesn't somebody always have to take the third bath. Yeah, because isn't it like the same bath water? That was the whole point. Yeah. But maybe it's like, you just leave it some time open to let him do his thing. He takes the third bath.

And then you are like, and then you have to say like, I am taking the fourth bath. It's like, you must have to do that. But that's what I would do. Who would want the third bath? I want the first bath when it's nice and high and it's clean and like yeah Well, that's just see that's your first water man. That's the cleanest water. Yeah, but it's the third bath You're not taking a bath. Yeah, you're you're just surneying yourself more. You're sitting in soupy like, you know, pee. Soiled water. Yeah. Like why are you even going to do it? Just live in your filth. Yeah, talk that. Don't live in everyone else's. Yeah, so they consider that like extremely

rude. Like don't take the third bath. I'm sorry about it. They prefer that you keep it quiet while in the bathhouse. I mean, okay. They don't want you to curse, so we would be sorry about it. And you can't engage in sexy time in the bathhouse. That's super rude. Like, don't be, so he's a horny little thing, but he's like, no, no. Well, he likes to watch the ladies' bath, but he doesn't want to watch the ladies and the man's baths. Okay, that's a little sexy time.

No sexy time out there. So low bath. Yeah, okay. If you don't follow these guidelines, the panic would be pretty tough on you. He would douse you in boiling hot water. If you were lucky. And if you weren't so lucky,

he would legit peel your skin off. Catherine Knight's time. Yikes. Yeah. It's also said that if he takes his claws to your back and decides to scratch you, that bad luck is coming your way Man, that seems like a disproportionate response. Yeah, so like if you like had some sexy time in the bathroom He's just gonna flay you alive. No. Yeah, I think he would take your skin off for that

Maybe if you were like oh crap You would get some boiling hot water or maybe just like a scratch Yeah, but then like more bad luck comes with the scratch. So I feel like I'd rather just the really hot water for a second. Yeah, just a quick little scalding. Like, ah, somebody flushed the toilet kind of thing. They're like, shit, that's the panic.

Yeah. I was- I was gonna think about that every time like the bath water, like the shower water gets really hot for a second because our old ass host has crazy ass water. I had to take a shower after I did like all my research on this one and that was my last fairy and I was like, oh wait till tomorrow.

Yeah, you like, I don't really need to know. No. What's going on here? Damn. So the Bannik is an interesting one. Yeah. He's multi-layered. He's pretty pissed.

Because at first you're like, what up little man? And then he's like, hi, and waves his hand and he's got these crazy hairy hands with like, awesome, you something like this Oh sh** Hi there They also like that to you Yeah, but it's different Take me to your grave I want him to sound like

Hi there I feel like he'd sound a little more influential That kind of sounds like a squid Hi there I am the medic Don't pee in my back for a while But he sounds like a squ. Hi there. I am the medic. Don't pee in my back for a minute. But he sounds like a squier. Maybe he does.

Because he's super like off-time. Did you just kiss? He's like, are you having sexy time? Are you cursing so he's like, hi there. I'm the medic. I don't want you having sexy time in here. I feel like that's also what the- Did you just say shit?

The chicken riders, I feel like that's what they said. Can you say to Judas say shit say to you to say shit again. Did you say shit? I'm sorry if I just blew your ear drum so well after. I think we just we manifested his voice I think that is his voice. I think so. Hopefully we don't find out. So yeah so is that the last fairy? That was it. That was the dark world of

fairies. If we come across any other ones in our travels, we'll throw a part of it right up there someday. Right now we'll get away from fairies for a little while, but that was rad. If you guys want to request a mini-sode, yeah, because we're next week, because mini-sodes are like pretty open and like pretty open Like it doesn't just have to be true crowd. Yeah, like as you've seen it can be like weird shit paranormal shit You know and Annie's raised in her hands. She has an idea later Annie But uh, yeah, I think that was pretty rad mine was really short But like that's what a mini-sode is so I was gonna say sometimes it's nice to have a quick little mini-sode

It's just like blue to just listen to on your commute or something. It's busted out. There was an interesting update in that collar out of mom. And remember the last time we talked about this was a couple weeks ago and I had set out. We were both like we don't feel good about this. I don't feel good about the fiance. Tell me tell me tell me. And then as soon as we posted that episode news came that they arrested the fiance. Oh shit. And everyone started messaging us of being like oh shit you guys are right. I was like new it. We didn't want to be right. Did not want to be right. I didn't want her to be dead. They still have not found it. It's Kelsey Barath her name is and they still haven't found her but they did the whole backyard and didn't find her. Well he's well I can't remember the cell phone paying from like 600 miles away so I have a feeling she's far away. And he's

being charged for first degree murder. They haven't found her yet but they're already charging him. And he must be charged with kidnapping if she's that far away. Well there's no he's also charged with solicitation from murder. What does that mean? Three counts of that, which means he tried to hire someone to murder her. Oh shit. And he either tried three different times with three different people or he had three different people do it. So there's still not letting everything out like all the details because they still haven't found her. Right. And I think it's like they need to hold some stuff close to the chest for it. But this dude did some falls.

Fuckin' fucked up shit. Yeah, it's like really, I've been like, I'm so obsessed with this case cause it's just so bizarre and it's so sad. And that's really sad too for like, they had a daughter and one year old. Yeah. And the one year old is with her family.

Okay, that's funny. Luckily now. So because he had custody, like when she went missing, he took custody of her, which is horrifying. Yeah, that's so scary. Yeah, I thought that was, it was, it was crazy that right after we posted the episode, it was like, boom, news. So I was like, oh, damn.

But yeah, so those, that's the, that's the big true crime news. Like here's some news Just get divorced exactly like and they weren't even married Where they divorced? Oh Just break up on end up from what I've read it doesn't even look like they were together at the time I think I think she ended the engagement. Yeah, so he's pissed off. Yeah, so it's like like there's a lot of fish in the scene You don't got a murder one to get to the next one. He seemed like like three counts of solicitation for murder You really wanted her dead. I just don't understand like people have said some fucked up shit to me Yeah, I've never wanted someone to die

That's it and somebody you like are engaged to you had a child You had a child together you literally created life like that should give you some kind of bond It you know it's like damn yeah that's what I was it so we'll definitely keep updating on that as it comes because holy shit yeah that's a lot but other than that I think that's really all we got right yeah other than um well up to you guys with all the new fun stuff website will be coming up soon um and we'll announce that when it happens and the website will probably be like a nice little central area for

everybody to get all the info. We'll still post on everything but it'll be a nice centralized area. In the meantime you can follow us on Instagram at morbid podcast, follow us on Twitter, a morbid podcast, send us a message on Facebook, morbid slash a true crime podcast, email us morbidpodcast morbid podcast. Send us a message on Facebook. Morebid slash a true crime podcast. Email us morbidpodcast.gemail.com. Donate to our Patreon if you feel so inclined. patreon.com slash morbidpodcast. And I think I said everything.

Yeah, I think you got it all. Subscribe, rate, review. If you're gonna be nice. Tell all your friends. You know, the word of mouth is how we get people to listen to us. So everybody's been awesome with that by the way because people keep telling us like, I got my whole office to listen to you. I know. I know. I've been fucking amazing. Really thank you guys so much. Thank you for being our personal marketing team all of you.

That's wild. Isn't it wild? Yeah. And I'm telling you, live show, man. Sure. 2019. We're putting it into the universe. I'm putting it into the universe. We're gonna do our first live show in 2019. And I'm gonna shit my pants. Shit, shit, my pants. Here we go.

So hopefully, yeah, and hopefully we'll be able to go to CrimeCon in two islands. And two islands. So we're hoping we can. I really hope so. Can't guarantee it it but we're definitely We're giving it all look it into it and we'll let you guys know when that's you know when we know if we're coming or not Because people have mentioned that too. I want to go to New Orleans So it's on my bucket list

So it's where my my book is based the book I'm writing you gotta go. I gotta go. I gotta do my mouth I gotta go to the buy mouth, but uh, the mouth. Mouth. But, uh, yeah. So that's all the updates, I think. Yeah. And thank you for listening. And we hope you keep it weird. Keep it weird. Keep it weird.

Keep it weird. Don't say shit. Give me a ride. To my grave. Give me a ride to my grave. Clean up your shit. And don't shit in the bathhouse. And give me that third bath. And don't shit in the bathhouse and give me that third bath and don't engage and sexy time

Bye bye Hey, Prime Members! You can listen to Morvid, Early, and Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the Amazon Music app today, or you can listen Add Free with Wondery Plus and Apple podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by completing a short survey at Wondery.com slash survey. What makes a person a murderer? Are they born to kill?

Or are they made to kill? I'm Candace DeLong and on my podcast Killer Psychie Daily, which you can find exclusively on Amazon Music, I share a quick 10-minute rundown every weekday on the motivations and behaviors of the criminal masterminds you read about in the news. I have decades of experience as a psychiatric nurse, FBI agent, and a criminal profiler. On Killer Psychie Daily, I'll give you my expert perspective on cases like the mysterious New York City drugings, Breaking Down Lori Vallow, a.k.a. Mommy Doom stays motives, and what drove Caitlin Armstrong to murder?

I'll also bring on expert guests who add even more insight into these criminal minds. I promise you won't regret adding these 10 minutes to your morning routine. Hey, Prime members, listen to the Amazon Music Exclusive Podcast Killer Psychie Daily in the Amazon Music app. Download the app today! today.