Morbid - Episode 378: Listener Tales 53

Episode Date: October 14, 2022

It is Listener Tales up in here, up in here! Do the monster mash my dudes because this is a SPOOKY HALLOWEEN edition. We’ve got tales of accidental stabbings at a Halloween birthday party, an unplanned Michael Myers Halloween meetup and a lighthouse prank caller. Oh and Ash sings Britney Spears, you’re welcome :)See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Hey weirdos, I'm A-M-A-S! And I'm Alina! And this right here is more bad! I'm not sure. Woo! I almost just started singing. It's more been in the morning, but it's very hot. It feels like it. It's more been in the early afternoon. Yes, that was so beautiful.

It doesn't flow as well. You could say just moreid in the early afternoon. Yes, that was so beautiful. It doesn't flow as well. You could say just morbid in the afternoon. All right, fine. I guess you're better at this. What about me? That was because it's my origination station.

Your origination station. Your hair looks really good today. Wow, thank you. It really does. I washed it. You should do that, Ralph. It's actually I'm just getting dope, do more often. See how bad they are doing. It, bro. I'm just kidding, don't do it. We're often seeing how they're doing.

It's great. I haven't washed my hair in a week. Hey, good for you. Hey, you're not supposed to. Don't wash your hair. But I did wash it. It was, it was due. Yeah, like sometimes you are supposed to.

Yeah, sometimes it needs to be confusing advice that I'm giving here. I'm like, you wash your hair good. Do that more often. You shouldn't wash your hair. Do it often. No, don't. Yeah, don't do that. It's got a week for mine when I'm like, you wash your hair good. Do that more often. You shouldn't wash your hair though. Do it often, no don't. Don't do that. It's gonna be weak for mine when you have like,

oh shit, it's been 12 hours for mine. Well yeah, no, that's good though. But thank you. You're welcome. Everybody notices when I wash my hair, put on makeup, which is like an interesting commentary on my life. I don't see him here though, but I love it.

Every time I'm like, hey, like, Gwendolyn, our barista, Gwendolyn, are you listening? Said, I love your makeup. And I was like, I, like, Gwendolyn or Arboresta. Gwendolyn, are you listening? Said, I love your makeup. And I was like, I actually wore some today. So thank you for commenting on that. I wish we could tell you the Starbucks we go to, we very much can't because.

No, scary. But, scary, don't you think? Don't you think you're on location? But I just wish that everybody could experience Arboresta because she's Arboresta and not yours. It's true. And yes, that is a Trixi and Gautier reference.

Gwynel and his ours, but shout out to Gwynel. Hey. It's a listener tale. In case you couldn't tell. In case you couldn't tell by the just chaos that happens in the beginning of everyone. Absolute buffoonery. Also, as I was opening my mouth to say that,

my jaw like cracked really a lot. I heard that. Also, as I was opening my mouth to say that, my jaw cracked really a lot. I heard that. Yeah, it kinda hurt. And I could see you're like, what? I wouldn't have. Yeah, I was like, oh, because she just opened her mouth while I was talking

and waited for me to finish with her mouth open. I do do that sometimes. And then she started talking. You know why I do that? It's because I am, according to TikTok, I have ADHD like the rest of you. Yeah, I was gonna sit like all of us. But, well, there it is.

Did you lose it? No, that was the ADHD. No, people with ADHD, I guess like interrupt people more often, like, oh, again, generalization, who knows. But I also am a Gemini, so like my brain works really fast and I like to talk a lot. So instead of saying my thing that I'm gonna say, I go to open my mouth and I'm like,

oh, you idiot, shut up. You're never an idiot. Thanks. Oh, you rude person. Don't enter into it. That's what it says. Although you're not rude either. Hey, girlie, wait a second.

Thank you. That works. That's what my brain says. But then my mouth is already open. And you go. That works. That's what my brain says. But then my mouth is already open and I just, ah, it works because it's funny. You just sit there with your mouth open and it's nice. It's very polite because you're waiting for someone to finish. But it's not good for me because I have tumja. Tumja.

Tumja, Tmj in case you're wondering. So you know what, let's get into. This is a listener tale so it is, what is it Ash? Brought to you by you for you from you and all, let's get it to. This is a listener tale. So it is, what is it, Ash? Brought to you by you for you from you and all about you. Sure is. Yes. Sure is. And the first one, so we decided we were going to theme today's listener tale episode. Do you remember what we're supposed, how we're supposed to say it from like two years ago? Do you remember? No. two years ago? Do you remember? No.

You forgot our special moment. Oh no, I did. What did I forget? Halloween! Oh, I like that. Okay, I feel you. Wow, what a good memory you have. I don't know if I could do it anymore though.

I guess we'll just have to let that moment die. We'll just say it's Halloween. It's a Halloween listener tails. Not as fun. Halloween. Listener tail up, so yeah. Because you know, listener tales. Not as fun. Halloween. Listener tale episode. Yeah. Because, you know, it's October.

What is it? It's the first week of October. Yeah, right? Yeah. So it's the first. It's the second week. No, it's the first week. Yeah.

I was like, wait a second, I know I'm right here. It's the first week of October. It's the first week of October. Yeah. I was like, wait a second, I know I'm right here. It's the first week of October. And it's the first listener tale of October, so we're like, let's Halloween it up,

but let's set it up with a bang. You guys did not disappoint. You never do. You never do. If you happen to have more Halloween listener tales, send them on in because we'll throw these in all months. So, I'll put Halloween in the subject. Yeah, make sure it's in the subject line,

because otherwise it's a little hard to find, because sometimes you'll search for Halloween and it's in the body of the Email, but it's not about Halloween and it's confusing Yeah, so but the first one that I'm gonna read is Buffy bats and booze. Oh my a Halloween listener tail I love it says hello to both of you awesome spooky ladies. My name is Abigail you can use my name and it's just I was just sure. And it's said just like it's spelled Abigail. I'm a long time fan. Oh gee, baby, LOL.

But seriously, y'all are great in listening to Morvitt has gotten me through a lot. The pandemic and recently my father's death. Oh, I'm sorry. He was a teen during the 70s and said he remembers all the news about Ted Bundy, John Wayne Gacy and Morv. Wow, he said it was wild.

I do miss him greatly in his crazy stories. Speaking of stories, this is the first time writing to you all, and I have many other listener tales to send in. But the one I have today for you is the best. I felt right out of Buffy for a moment, LOL. I have included my story in a putt of a, haha. But first I must tell you an 80-bitty quick story

about a scam that some sick fucker tried to get my family with the other day. Oh no! Oh no! Fuck a scammer! So it says definitely watch out because we got a call early one morning. A young woman her teen was crying and screaming call 911. And this is only two days ago, by the way, so this is recent. My husband asked who she said and what was wrong, who she was, excuse me, who she was and what was wrong. And she repeated, call 911. Then a man came on the line. He said, hello, your daughter is here. She's hurt real bad. Well, we do not have a daughter. So my husband hung up. I got worried though and called 911 to report this. The operator

searched the number and could not find any info on it and told me it is a scam that she's heard of before. What sick fucking fuckers do this? Looks like this D-bag was that type of person. So my hubby, Chase, you can use his name too. He's in both stories. Hi Chase. I called him back and asked for his name. He would not provide that. Just stated, come get your daughter. She needs your help. To that chase replied, what is her name? He said, I don't know, I don't know, but she gave me your name and your number. Yes, ladies and gentlemen, he had his full name

and phone number, what the fuck? Chase asked what his name was again, what her name was again, or what his name, sorry. And he gave him a ridiculous fake name. Then my husband's last reply to the fucker was, I do not have a daughter, and the scumbag hung up. A text message was sent from my hubby saying we caught him in the act and reported him,

and this nasty mother fucker came back with all these insults and garbage messages like we were the bad guys. The nerve. Whatever. He was just salty we didn't fall for his tricks. So yeah, that's what happened. I just cannot believe the lows of this scum will go for money Geez go get a job like the rest of us, but I digress and that's also so confusing because I'm like what what the hell

Yeah, like what the and well, you know what it is because I've heard of these happening before and Like usually they target like older people who will fall for these thing that they just do it until they find someone Who does have a daughter and they pretend that they have their daughter. So for, they'll say that the daughter or the son was in a car accident and they can't get on the phone, but they had your number in their phone as mom and dad. So I called you, you have to like, you know, they'll like, I don't even know what it's for. It's basically to get money in some way.

But people do that and they prey on people that like, they love their families, help their families. But so fucked. But I've heard these come around in like cycles. These happen so just everybody be aware of that because I don't want anyone falling for that. I've heard of them going different ways too. I actually saw a TikTok recently,

and I don't know how true this, because I know like sometimes things get a little crazy when they're reiterated. But this one TikTok was saying that like this girl showed up on somebody's porch and she was like, they thought she was bloody and she was screaming like, call 911, like please let me in. Like they're after me. And this couple was like kind of a little bit like they were like, I don't know what's

suspicious of what was going on. And when they didn't let her in, they saw like two, she got into a car with two guys. Oh, I've actually heard of that kind of thing happen. Yeah, it's like, were they gonna do this? Just be really careful, everybody. I just don't answer my door. If I don't know who's out the door.

Honestly, don't, because I've seen like things where, you know, somebody will come up and say, like, can I get you your phone to call 911? Always, if you're talking to someone outside of your house, I'll call for you. I'll call for you. I'll call for you what happened. You got to stay outside.

You got to stay outside. I never let that person into your house. Like as much as you want to help people, and we have told stories where people have been hurt and have been able to be helped. But I think it's just such a scary world these days. And I think a lot of those incidents were like in the past. So far in the past that things have changed so much now where it's incredibly more dangerous.

Yeah, and as long as you can help by calling Nano No One or something, you're so hot. You're doing your help, right? You're doing what, you're being smart by protecting you and your family, but also taking care of someone else. Just a little PSA. Now it says at the end of this,

I've been working on this for a while. And like I said earlier, my father passed away. He moved on a few months ago, and I've not been myself. I'm so sorry. I know. I can't imagine that. I really can't. No. I'm trying to work on that these days, finishing my listener tail and sending it in would help me in this journey. I hope all of this is not too long. I was just going to send in the tail, but this scam thing happened recently and got my blood boiling.

I had to include it to warn y'all in all of the wonderful morbid fans. Thank you for doing that. So without further ado, here is my spooky oogie Halloween listener tale attached as a double space put a faaaaaah. Oh, you know my love language. Let's go. My story takes place in my hometown of Bluefield, West Virginia on Halloween night in 2014. My husband Chase and I rented a small-down hometown town,

not a fancy house, just a first-home type of deal. Halloween night we decided to throw a party, and as the night went on and we got tired of beer pong, we came up with a brilliant idea to make a homemade Ouija board and do a say-on. No! You think I would know better being a die-hard buffy fan, but living in a small town, there

was not much we found to do other than get together, drink, and do stupid things such as burning old couches, etc. We did our research online. Yeah, we did the damn thing. Not. With a big piece of cardboard and sharpies, we made a poor attempt at a Ouija board. I know it's supposed to be, and, but that sounds weird, so spell check and suck it. LOL. This at a Ouija board. I know it's supposed to be an but that sounds weird so spell check can suck it. LOL. That's a Ouija board. Yeah, it is. It's hard because it's like

an Ouija board, you know. Yeah, like that sound stew, but it doesn't make sense. Of course, nothing happened except for a few of us pretending to be a spirit and pushing the shot glass around to scare the group. After the failure, we laughed at the whole thing and went about our evening. Not thinking straight again, alcohol. Do not drink and try to summon ghost y'all. We forgot to burn the Ouija board and it got thrown in the trash bin with the rest of the garbage from that night and hauled away the next. I thought that you weren't supposed to burn the Ouija board. I don't know if there's varying things. So I don't think there's one like strict belief system for what works. So, but I she says, I realized this too late and thought, oh no, hope that doesn't come

back to bite me in the ass. You know what? I feel like it does. A little while. Four-shot away. Things seem cool. Nothing going on, but some things falling off our broke shelf in the living room. We just thought it was not level or doors closing must have been the cause.

But one evening, it became clear it was something else. I was home alone watching TV and painting my toenails. Right after finishing up. I was still leaning over with the polish in one hand and the brush in the other when I felt something bump onto my hand. Nope, goodbye. At that moment the polish was knocked from my fingers. Now you would think it would have just fallen straight to the floor, right?

Nope. The bottle made three circles, three circles, and then fell to the floor. What? I felt a little crazy, like that didn't happen, but clearly on the carpet, there were three bright pink circles. What? I even left it for Chase to see to make sure I wasn't Cuckoo Crazy Bananas. Oh, well.

He saw it too and mentioned things have been falling off the bookshelf. We shook it off and left it well enough alone. If there was a ghost, I say leave it alone and let it be a nuisance. I'm not messing with it and pissing it off more. Nope, won't do that, not today. That's my attitude. After this, life went back to what we considered normal, and then one evening we were startled by a loud noise in my kitchen. My husband went in and turned on the light and a bat flew down from the top of our cabinets, scaring us half to death. No. Scared as fuck, but wanting it out of the house,

we eventually chased it outside with a broom and mop. So scary. Thinking things were over and it was a rogue bat, we went about our lives. Yeah, we should have learned better by now. Uh-oh. We did live in West Virginia after all, and the wildlife is abundant and does

make its way into your house every once in a while. A few days past, we were sitting on the couch watching TV and another bat flies into our living room. This is Elena's dream by the way. This is pretty great. She loves that. She loves that. Super diseased. Yeah, true. But I feel like that's the, I feel like this is weird that you're dream. I'd be like, oh, we got to get it out. Like I'd be. I'd be like, oh, we gotta get it out. Like I'd be so excited, but like, oh, we gotta get it out. There also, like if you do end up having a bad problem, they're so expensive to get out.

Oh, so hard to get out of your house. So she says, what the fuck? Our landlord discovered that we had a colony of that. Living in our roof and walls, that happened to my boss ones. And it was like $1,500 to get rid of them all. We moved out of that house shortly and never had any issues after that. We fully believe we let something out that night.

Too many coincidences and weird things happening to convince me otherwise, just saying. So yeah, the lesson of this today's alcohol does not mix well with saiyans. Hello, oh, and scammers are terrible horrible people. Watch out. Thank you, Elena and Ash, for all that you have done for us. Morbid beasties and besties.

Y'all are fantastically awesome spooky ladies. Peace and love, Abigail. Aw. Abigail, you're so sweet. And I'm really, I really hope that helped to write that down. Like helped you get through what's going on, losing your dad. And I wish you had a picture of the,

of the Dale Polish ring. I know. I wanna see it. Because I believe you. I don't like to see this. But I can picture it in my head and I wonder if it's the same thing I see. Yes.

But if you ask Ash, you did in fact release something with that fake Ouija board. Yeah, you did. Yeah. So it's a Ouija board. It's not fake. Like you made it. It's a Ouija board. It's like when people are like is that a fake bag. I'm like it exists

Are you so mad? Like shut up. You made a weager board. Oh, man. Thank you Abigail and Chase I know thank you for your cameo and I think it's Abby girl Abby go. Yeah. Okay But yeah, thank you guys. Thanks. What if you were trafficked into a cult over shot nine times, or fell in love with a vampire, or went into a minor surgery and woke up one week later, paralyzed. What would you do? I'm Whit Missildine, the creator of this is actually happening, a podcast from Wondry that brings you extraordinary true stories of life-changing events

told by the people who lived them. From a young man that dooms his entire future with one choice, to a woman who survived a notorious serial killer. You'll hear their first-person account of how they overcame remarkable circumstances. Each episode is an exploration of the human spirit and personal discovery. These haunting accounts sound like Hollywood movies, but I assure you this is actually happening. Follow this is actually happening wherever you get your podcasts.

You can listen to ad free on the Amazon Music or Wunderly app. Hey there, fellow podcast listener, it's Elena and Ash and we're taking you back to the days before streaming services. Whoa, you know when you would come home from high school and it was only a few hours until that TV show, everyone was watching was about to come on. Well, in 1999, that show was Buffy the Vampire Slayer. In our podcast with Wondery, the re-watcher Buffy the Vampire Slayer,

we take it back to 1999. So get out your knee high boots and paste that poster of Angel on the wall. It's time to enter the Buffyverse. Some of you avid morbid listeners already know what we've gotten store. Hey, wear nose. Join us as we sway our way through Buffy's drama, action, and romance. Episode by episodes. Slay see, follow the rewatcher Buffy the Vampire Slayer, wherever you get your podcasts. You can listen early and add free on the Amazon Music or Wondery app. Darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn, darn Next one is listener tale. The night I was stranded on an island in Massachusetts during a nori-stur in a ghost kept calling the police. Yeet.

I love it. I love when it just ends. Yeet. I love it. Hi there, you beautiful magical weirdos. My name is Deanna, like Damian Eccles, which Egothy misunderstood girlfriend. Oh yeah.

I totally love that you brought it there. And they said, I totally screamed, that's my name. When she came up in the West Memphis three episode, I'm like, I love you all, I love when people have my name because I do that exact same thing. I'm like, that's my name! Like, it's about me. Just like, what a great connection to me. It's like, so- My name is Diana.

Yup, like, Damien and Kosmucci got an interesting girlfriend. I love it. I've never met a Diana that introduced themselves like for you. So I'm excited. Oh Diana that introduced themselves like for you. So I'm excited. Oh man, that was great. Now I fucking love you both and as a native mainer, I love listening to other New England gals talk about spooky fucked up shit. Yeah, yeah.

Every time I listen I feel like you're my hashtag BFFs and we're hanging out shooting the shit. We are your BFFs and we are shooting the shit. Thank you so much for bringing so much joy and murder to my life. No problem. I like that. Congrats on the book. It is bold, underlined, italicized, amazing. All the font choices. Amazing. And you should be so proud of yourself. How many people get to say that they're in New York Times best-selling author? Thank you, Diana. You witchy-gothed misunderstood, Davey and Eccles girlfriend. 10Eural.com slash the butcher and the red or a target BJ's Walmart or Kroger near you. There you go. Ash, I literally squealed when you announced that you and Drew were engaged.

I did too. Me too. Finding your person in the chit-cho of life is truly a gift. Also, I cannot wait to see the wedding picks, mostly because you're wedding, mostly you're wedding dress because knowing you is going gonna be hashtag fierce. It is. Thank you. I got my wedding, I don't think I even said anything about that. Yeah, I've been getting dressed. Yeah, I posted it on Insta, but for those of you that don't partake in the social media.

Partake in the social media. Yeah, I'm not gonna be partaking much longer. No, the Elon Musk is about to enter. I was like, bye. Oh, I immediately deactivated my Twitter. Yeah. Yeah. I was like, this is not the place for me anymore.

But yes, I did get my wedding dress in. I think it is pretty fierce. I cried. I know it prepares you for what an emotional day that's going to be. It is very emotional. I cried. Especially, it just like brings out all the like,

oh, I get to spend the whole, the whole of this life with my person. And it's so special, because my grandparents bought my wedding dress, so I love them. But anyways, Ladi-Dadi, you feel free to use mine and my friend's names. I like attention, too.

And we'll make everybody, I know, listen to this if you read it also. I know this is long, and I feel like I should tell you to edit it as needed. No! No way! I worked fucking hard on this, and you never shortened people's stories, anyway, so fuck it. Read the whole goddamn thing. No way. I worked fucking hard on this and you never shortened people's stories.

No, no. So fuck it. Read the whole goddamn thing. Will do. I've attached it as a double spaced. Size 14 font put a fuck. I was almost about to break up. Sorry. Thank you for being my best friends who I never met and don't even know I'm alive.

Now we do. And enjoy the story of the night that I was stranded on an island in Massachusetts during a nori staring a ghost kept calling the police eat. But we can go, Diana. Also just a quick thing to say at the end of this, like how she's like, thanks for being my best friends I've never met.

And I feel like lately, it's like hit me even harder than I'm like, you guys really are, like whenever I get to, like we get to talk or see one of you, like at the book signing and all that, I was like, oh shit, you like really are, whenever I get to, we get to talk or see one of you, like at the book signing and all that, I was like, oh shit, you like really are. Just like best friends that we've never met. Every time we would meet someone,

I was like, no, we know each other. And I meet you and I'm like, wow, I like you so much more than people that I've known for 14 plus years. Yeah, my shit. Where have you been on my life? Literally. Yeah.

So thank you for saying that because we really do feel the same way. We truly truly do. All right, this story takes place in Massachusetts, KED on FOMA Island, which is connected to Newberry Port, Massachusetts by a small bridge. Remember that piece? It is important later. I got it in my noggin.

Me too. I also love that you did this size 14 because my eyes are just focusing. Your eyes are just like, yeah. They're like, it's so pleased. It's living. One of my best friends from college Matt was a park ranger on Plum Island for a few years.

On Halloween weekend, I haven't heard it called that in so long. Wow, the stelge. On Halloween end of 2018, me and our other friend Jake went to visit. We were expecting Noreaster that weekend, which for those of you who don't know what that is, it is a big tropical storm that's left the south

and then decides to blow its bitch ass up through the northeast causing people to forget how to drive, hoard food, and generally lose their fucking shit. We gotta get the bread and the water! That's what they say. A noree stick hit. There's a noree stick coming! Good to show us! In reality, they're usually not that bad, and are more of an excuse to stay home and eat

said, hoarded food. 100% truth. Anyway, my friend had his housing provided to him through the park service and was living in an old light keepers house. Big fucking red flag right here. But for some reason, I decided to run towards this red flag and not away from it, probably because I

didn't have your podcast warn me. I arrived that Friday night to Matt's house and enjoyed catching up with my friends who I hadn't seen in a few months. All is normal, we're talking about Halloween, eating candy, watching cartoons on Netflix because duh. Matt tells us a bit about the house, how sometimes the heat acts funny and doesn't work, but that he generally likes living here.

He does warn us that sometimes if storms get too strong, the bridge on the island floods and people get stuck out here until low tide, something likely to happen tonight. Fucking lovely. At this point, nothing in the house was screaming, I'm haunted, bitch, buckle up. Imagine if it did, though. I would love that. If I ever haunted a place,

I would literally just go, I'm haunted, bitch, buckle up. It's just warning. But the vibes were definitely a bit off, but I'm an anxious bitch, so I just thought it was my own bad vibes. It finally gets late enough that we decide to go to bed. I was staying on the second floor in my own room in the eastern corner of the house. My friend Matt was in the room next to me, and Jake was downstairs on the couch.

Matt also had a coworker who lived in the house with him, and her room was on the other side of his in the western corner. So I brushed my teeth, put on my warm PJs and fuzzy socks. Yes, a must for an old New England house, and settled down into bed to play candy crush so I don't slip into a merry-go-round of internal doom while trying to fall asleep. Alina plays candy crush before bed too. I do, I also play best fiends,

and I do little brain games. Look at you. Yeah, I watch TikTok before bed. But by this point, the wind has really picked up and is slamming into the houses, I do little brain games. Look at you. Yeah, I watch TikTok before. By this point the wind has really picked up and is slamming into the house as making everything creek and shake. I try to fall asleep, but I just can't. Something feels off. Everything seems too loud, too unsettled, and I have this weird hyper vigilance that I can't shut off more than just my normal anxiety. I'm tossing and turning all night and mixed in with the sounds of the storm, I keep hearing somebody walking in the hallway.

My rational self told me that it was either Matt, Jake or the roommate, but my weirdo self was like, girl, this is some fucking super natural shit. Despite my gut telling me to peek out my head out of the room, I was not going to be that bitch that goes looking for ghosts in the middle of the night on an island during a fucking nor Easter on Halloween and with a full moon. I love a good bit of trouble, but not the supernatural kind.

Needless to say, I did not sleep that night. Morning finally comes and I pull my tired ass out of bed to go eat breakfast. I ask my friends if they or the roommate were up during the night and walking around and then tell me no, they slept all through the night. I told them that I heard footsteps in the hallway and how I was literally terrified all night and couldn't sleep. They just sort of looked at me like I was crazy and chalked it up to the sounds from the storm.

Fine guys, whatever. Fine guys. I'll just go fuck myself. Shortly after this conversation, while we're all still sitting at the breakfast table, somebody loudly knocks on the front door. Matt answers and it's a police officer. Now being a small, mostly law abiding white girl who hates being in trouble,

I have literally no reason to be afraid of the cops, but I still am. I don't know, man. A cop just showing up up at your house first thing in the morning while you're still in your PJs, just isn't a good thing. Yeah, it's just got bad vibes. Yeah, it's like you're like something bad happen.

Yeah, it happens. Why would you. Yeah, it's like you're like something bad happened. Yeah, it's like why would you be here if anything good was happening? But like they're not coming to be like, you guys are doing great. Yeah. No, it gets good if something bad happened. Exactly.

The officer tells Matt that they got several calls from this address last night, but every time dispatch answered, no one was there. They would try calling back, but the film would just keep bringing and nobody would answer it. What? Matt tells the officer that the only landline on the property is across the yard in the barn, and that the barn stays locked, and only certain park staff have the keys to open it, but that none of

them live here. I am about shooting myself at this point, who the fuck was calling the cops in the middle of a fucking northeastor fromEaster from a locked barn. Nope, I'm done, yeah, no. I was fucking swim across that bridge to get off this haunted spit of land. I've seen Shutter Island, this is not end well, by. Amazing, I love you. So the cop goes and peaks in the barn,

finds nothing and leaves. My friends are a little weirded out this at this point, but not at all. I know, I'd be like really weirded out. But Matt, who besides being one of the chillest people I know is also highly logical and scientific, so he just kind of shrugs it off. But not before nonchalantly telling us

that this has happened before. Matt, Matt, you gotta share that information. Also Matt, what's the logical explanation for a locked barn being opened in the middle of a noreaster and somebody calling 911 multiple times, but not picking up the phone when 911 called back? Yeah, my brain would have a hard time making sense of that.

How do you logic that? I do not. Not me. I'm sorry, what? You have a literal ghost who walks the halls and calls the cops and you're just fine with it? I can't. Thankfully, my friends decided we should go into Newberry

Port for the afternoon and get off the island. And luckily, the tides and storm cooperated with us. We ate grilled cheese, yes. And soup, I bet it had to have been tomato. Please tell me it was. You have, can we get that? Oh, we already got ready for the day. We should do that tomorrow.

Make a note. Make a note. Thank you, grilled cheese and tomato soup. Absolutely. So we ate that from a note. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you, Gail Cheese and tomato soup. Absolutely. So we ate that from a sticky wood panel dress shop, bought a board game from a toy store in somebody's basement, and watched the massive waves breaking over the sand dudes and flooding

the parking lots and streets. We finally have to go back to the house, but eat pasta for dinner. So at least I'm not scared and hungry. I was going to say so there's a positive. Yeah, pasta always makes things better. That night, I am way too fucking terrified to sleep alone in my room. So I make Jake drag my mattress downstairs

and I sleep next to him on the floor. Good call. I was finally able to get some rest, but I woke up multiple times throughout the night and always felt like someone was watching me, fucking disgusting. Nothing else weird happened that weekend, but I was fucking glad when it was time to go

and I could get the fuck out of that house. Flash forward to a few months later. I'm catching up with Matt and Jake again, and Matt just casually mentions that he talked to his co-workers about how I was convinced the house was haunted. And apparently they go, oh yeah, one of the old lighthouse keepers

hanged himself in that house. Oh, excuse the fuck out of me. Part of me was terrified that I actually did spend the weekend with a cop calling mother fucker, undead lighthouse keeper, but a bigger part of me was thrilled that I was right. I'm a Sagittarius, so you know, I have to be right at the time. I'm a Sagittarius rising, and I just realized why we're friends. I'm a Capricorn, and I also have to be right all the time, so this would also please me greatly.

Oh, no, no, no, you have to put the whole effect on it. You're a Capricorn and I also have to be right all the time. So this would also please me greatly. Oh, no, no, no, you have to put the whole effect on it. You're a Capricorn and a Virgo rising. Yeah. You have to be right all the time or the world will explode. Literally. I'm just a Gemini. So even if you don't think I'm right, I am right. But I tried to do some research to see what I could find

about the lighthouse and who died there. But there isn't much listed. What I did find was that the son of the original lighthouse keeper, Lewis Loll, died there in December of 1823. According to New England Lighthouses.net, we use that a lot. It was a freezing cold night and he started a charcoal file to keep the whale oil, which was used to keep the light lit from congealing. He died at his post from his fixation.

Maybe this was why the heat was always messed up. Literally freaking out writing this because oh my god, that makes so much sense. It does. It does, yeah. Anyway, that's how I spent Halloween and stranded on an island during a nori-star with a ghost who kept calling the cops.

Thanks for reading it and keep it weird, but probably not this weird. PS, maybe I'll make my little sister write in and tell you about the... tell you about the night she drove a murderer home from work. Get rid of that, maybe. Say, I'm gonna make my little sister write into you. Do the...

I heard to the keyboard right now. I need to know. Love you, Diana. Diana. Diana, we love you. You are amazing. Holy shit, so funny. What a tale and what a name. You have a really great email picture too. Look at you

You do. I know. I love seeing your email pictures. I know. I do. You guys are just like, I mean, you're all wonderful You're all pictures. You're gorgeous. We get to see a face. Yeah, and I'm saying So my next Tail on here is just called Listener tail. All right. No, I'm just kidding, I'm excited. Just listener tail, but don't worry about it.

Because they kept the climactic for the part in the story. Yeah, this climactic. This is a nice slow burn where they're like, I don't know, it's a listener tail, you wanna check it out and then you open it up and it's like boom. It's a choose your own adventure.

It's like, maybe open me, maybe don't, but like you might be fucked up if you don't. Just saying, so this is, hi ladies, I am so excited to share my listener tale with ya. I love your podcast, your banter, and your love for each other. Oh, thank you. We don't even like each other.

I'm a pilot. What? I'm a pilot. You looked at me when you said that. I knew it. That's so cool. I knew it was right. That's so cool. It was right up. That's incredible. That's incredible. I thought Elena was like, I'm a pilot. Because you guys said like we didn't really like each other and I was like, I'm a pilot. I was like, you have fear of flying. You can't talk to you pilot. Sure do. Could not be a pilot.

Alright, thank you. Wow, that's awesome. Well, since I'm a pilot, that's fucking rad. And you girls have gotten me through so many red eye flights through the dead of night when all is dark and quiet and I'm just trying to stay awake and engage. Shh, don't tell. Hopefully that didn't help my fear of flying at all. Thank you so much for that friend.

I listen as much as I can, especially when I'm getting ready in the morning. didn't help my fairflying at all. Thank you so much for that friend. I listen as much as I can, especially when I'm getting ready in the morning. Let me just make a quick mental note. Do not take a red eye flight. Yeah, I don't think that's the best place for you. No, my little girls refer to you guys as the ladies that say bad words.

They're not alone in that. So many people tell us that like their kids are like, oh, those are the ladies that say the S-Pom right? Yes. I love that. I've been called worse. So. This is the best I've been called.

This has been called way worse. I hope you enjoy my little tale and I would be so stoked to hear it on the pod. Thanks for reading. I'm not going to say your name yet because I don't know if I can. Oh, you don't, you. I'm Nikki. Yes, I can. Yay. Nikki. Nikki's the don't, you. I don't know if I can. Nikki, yes, I can.

Yay. Nikki, Nikki's the first pilot, guys. I was just gonna say, I don't think we fully, like here, I'm just gonna, I'm gonna put a blanket statement on everybody. I don't think all of us take into consideration what a badass you have to be to fly a whole last plane in the sky.

I can't even fathom it. Yeah, you have to be like, pretty bad ass. Like, you're just flying all plane. Yeah, all the souls. Yeah. So through the sky, thousands and thousands of feet up there. And for thousands and thousands of miles sometimes. And then you just land it and you just go have a great vacation

everybody and nobody's like, what the fuck did you just do, pilot? And you do it multiple times a day. So that's just wild. That's why it's, you're crazy and awesome. Yeah, that's why I'm always super, super nice to the flight attendants and then if you do get, when you go on, sometimes you'll see the pilot. Yeah, I'm always like, thanks so much.

Yeah, because I'm like, no, really, thanks so much. I think you were amazing. I even used to think the bus driver when I would get off at school. Yeah. A few other people did, but a lot of people don't. And no, and it's like, these are people responsible for your safety.

Yeah, so say thanks. They do a good job. Say thanks. Say thank you. So thanks, Nikki. Thank you, Nikki. Alright, so that time my mom directed traffic into a dead body. Oh. So you see why that listener tale, very, very, very, very smart, loose to get us in here.

I like that word. It says backstory. I was 14 living in Colorado, 1994. My older brother, Jeff, who was six years older, six years older was in college. He was a good-ish football player and was the kicker. He had earned himself a scholarship to play college football. Cool, right?

Wrong. This was a partial scholarship at a tiny college in Bumfuck, Kansas, that literally no one had heard of. Oh, so every weekend my parents and I had to drive 10 hours to watch the games. Oh, because they were so proud. So naturally, my football hating ass had to come and support him.

Oh, yeah, that's so terrible. I'm not gonna watch. I'm sorry, America. Football is like watching paint dry. and there's new rules every five minutes I'm trying to understand it, but it's real hard actually Trid I was playing football to me. I found a wheel turning I know Trid's real name, but Trid

Yeah, Trid didn't explain football to you. Yeah, Trid did explain football to you. Yeah, through a whole and real time. He didn't have to do that, but he made it more palatable than anybody else has. Of course he did. Still don't quite get it, but go watch Trid and Shina Melwani on TikTok because they're amazing. Or YouTube, they've been together.

And they're also just amazing humans, by the way. They think I'm our actual best friend. No, they're like amazing. Yeah, I would trust them with my life. In fact, we just talked to Trude for like an hour and time. We certainly did. So, all right, back to the story.

Oh, he literally ran on the field, kicked the ball, and ran off. I know that's tough too, when he's the kicker. That's all you see of him. Yep. It was like two minutes of play time, but I had to sit there and freeze my ass off pretending to cheer for the entire goddamn game. Naturally, my cheap ass parents never got a hotel, so we

would have to drive back home after the game's through the night. Oh, so that's a 20 fucking hours back terrible. That's terrible. That's terrible. Holy shit. But like, wow, that's some real, that's some parental, uh, commitment there. This particular game was homecoming and was on Halloween. You can bet your ass I was pissed to have missed Halloween for this of all things.

That shitty of them to put it on Halloween. Yeah, that's not cool. We began our 10-hour road trip home after the game at 8 p.m. I, a cranky teen, was shoved in the back of my mom's escort wagon with nothing to do but sleep. At about 3 a.m., yep, you heard me right, 3 a.m. I was awoken with startle to my parents saying, is that a dead body? I popped up so fast to look out the window

and saw the figure lying in the middle of the interstate. Oh no. As we approached, we all assumed it's Halloween and probably a scarecrow or prank. My dad slowed, and as we got closer, we discovered it was definitely a man's body. We pulled to the side of the road and mom got out. My dad was yelling at her to get back in the car.

That she was crazy and you can't just get out in the middle of the highway. But her crazy ass just went anyway. Oh, she's an empath. I should explain that my mom, a four-foot-four-foot-five-inch Italian lady, doesn't take shit from anyone. Hell yeah. It certainly doesn't ever listen to reason. I love her.

She's amazing. She approached the body and kept yelling, it's real. Oh my god, it's real. She was telling me to stay in the car before my dad to come help her. Neither of us moved. Hell no, we're not getting out of the car in the middle of the night on the highway on Halloween

to what? Help her move a body? No fucking thank you. Yeah, don't touch that. It was pitch black and super creepy. There were no cell phones at the time, so we just had to wait for help to arrive. My God. I didn't even think of that. Due to the time, there were, due to the time, there were very few cars out. Soon we saw headlights approaching. Did my mom get out of the middle of the road? Nope. She decided it was her job to direct traffic around this body all the while my dad begging her to get back in the car

This is the best. This should be on the sitcom. What a chaotic scene The first car was approaching very quickly and saw my mom did not slow down But in an effort to not hit my mother flailing her arms like a crazy person the car diverted and went straight Over the body. Oh After the impact they stopped about 10 feet past. The car behind them did the exact same thing. However, this car was going fast enough that they hit the body, went airborne, and literally landed with the front of their car directly

on top of the rear of the previous car. On top of it. This was a disaster, and my mom had directed them right into the bottle. Oh, no. This is horrible. This is terrible. I am sure you can imagine the sound of the cars impacting the body at 70 miles per hour.

It is something I will never forget. Oh, at this point, chaos ensues. Bone crushing, cars colliding, my poor mother screaming in horror. My dad is yelling at my mom, you directed them right into him! Get back in the damn car! The drivers of both the cars were obviously terrified and screaming, looking between the body

and their super fucked up cars. Because of their probably like, oh fuck did I kill him? That was walking. I'm pretty sure drunk from the Halloween fun they had, their cars were piled on top of each other, and the body was still wedged under the last car. Oh, that's nice.

It was unreal. Eventually, a truck driver stopped and was able to radio for help. We stayed for questioning and I remember listening to the officers and my dad yelling at my mom for the myriad of shit she had done wrong. Ooh, but as soon as the officer started yelling at her, I'd be like, back the fuck up. Back up. Do not yell at me. That's my mom. What would you do?

We later found out that the the fuck up. Back up. Do not yell at me. That's my mom. What would you do? We later found out that the man was murdered. Oh shit. He was a college professor and boulder who had been at a club that night. He was gay and it was suspected that he was taken from the club he was at murdered and thrown from the vehicle. Why are people such a sh**?

This was a senseless hate crime. I've looked back and have found nothing pertaining to this case, that's shocking. Other than the one newspaper article we saw that Monday morning. The shocking, but is it? Well, that's what, I mean that shock exactly. Like sarcasm, right.

The driver and passengers of the first vehicle sustained minor injuries. Well, the driver of the second was arrested for reckless driving, and DUI. Oh, man. Needless to say, I didn't leave my parents side for the next two days. I couldn't stop picturing and hearing the man's body

being completely decimated right before my bury eyes. That's terrible. I can safely say this was the worst talent we never. Thanks for listening. Oh, man, Nikki. What a tale. Oh, my God. Nikki.

Biker's. Goodness. I am a loss Niki, bikers. Goodness. I am a loss for words. Me too, and that doesn't happen a lot. But thank you for sharing that, that poor professor. I know, like the fact that he was murdered, first of all, and then like a literal hate crime happened. He was murdered.

And then he's like, decimated. And then his body was completely decimated through no fault of anybody like, you know, yeah, it just happened Yeah, it's like oh my god What a terrible series of events and then for you just have to witness all of that like terrible Also, what's the difference between Descrated and decimated how I've been saying the wrong thing no, they're both words Words I can tell you the actual definitions of both of them. I love that. I'll give you some elevator music

Thank you Boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop boop or disperse something wildly. F widely. Excuse me, or wildly. So Typhe, you could be desecrated and decimated. Absolutely. And he was. Yeah, it makes sense both ways. Okay, good. I was like, oh, fuck did I say the word wrong? I love words. No, you're good.

Alrighty, now that we know how to say words and different versions of words, we can go to the next listener tale. Words. I thought you were just gonna say words. I was gonna, but then it went into words. I like that better. Yeah, it's very author-y of you.

There you go. Tiny, real, decom social. Listener Tales, a ghost heated my stand-up closet on Halloween. Whoa. Here's a spooky 2020 listener tale for you. Hell yeah. All right.

Happy spooky season, weirdos. My name is Ashley. Me too. Kind of. Yes, you may use my name and any other names in this listener tale. Hell yeah. And I am from the middle of nowhere in Nebraska.

I've been listening to your podcast for about a year now, and y'all have forever changed my podcast life. I was never a podcast person until I came across your show. And since then, not only have I been hooked, but my boyfriend and my whole college cheerleading team listens to you. Oh my God, I love it. That's so cool.

You are hilarious and so true to yourselves, and we need more people like you on this planet. Oh, same goes for you, man. That got you. Now, let's go to the good stuff. I am going to first take you back to my end of sophomore year of college in 2018. I had just transferred from a community college

to a very fucking expensive private college in Hastings, Nebraska. I will regret this decision later in life, but I'd be blessed. I was living in an apartment at the time and decided that it was time for an upgrade. A couple girls on my cheerleading team and I decided to move into a new house. It looked like any other ordinary house. I was the last one to move into the house so I got the last pick of bedrooms. Mine happened to be the smallest room of the last pick of bedrooms. Mine happened to be the, yes, mine happened to be the smallest room of the house in the basement.

Ooh, you like can't do that to somebody. I'd be so mad at my team. Yeah, I would not be happy. I'd be like, no, no, no, we'd draw sticks for that, right? Yeah, exactly. About a week after moving into the house, everything was normal. I was still putting shit away

because I'm an nasty procrastinator, same. Yeah. And I had random stuff everywhere. One day, we had cheer practice, and we all left the house. I returned from practice later than everybody else because I decided to go get some food. When I returned, I went to my bedroom, and I noticed that things were a little off.

Everyone has random decorations in their room, like mason jars, pictures, a decorative beer bottle, still full of beer, LOL college things. When I walked into my room, these little items, oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, we're all fucking upside down. Eek. That's not good. Weird. That's not good. I don't know why it's not good, but it's not good. It's not good when things are upside down. They're just the wrong way. They should be right side up. Exactly. Mason jars full of shit, picture frames, and yes, the full ass bottle of beer standing on its cap.

I looked at everything just standing in the doorway. I quickly put everything right side up and ran upstairs to bitch at my roommates for touching my stuff. I still ask my roommates to this day if they touch my shit to scare me and they deny it every time I ask them. Huh.

All right. Huh. All right. Huh. I feel like I should lock them. I know if I trust these roommates. I know. I don't know about it. This was the first of a handful of times that my shit was touched or moved.

Nothing ever happened upstairs though. Pom-poms would wrestle as if somebody was moving them. Things would fall off the walls, but those things can all be explained like the command strip suck out. Yeah, they do sometimes. And the air conditioning turned on. There is one night in particular though

that I will never forget. And to this day, it terrifies me and cracks my shit up at the same time. Oh man. In October of 2020, yes, it was October 31st, the spookiest Halloween yet. My wonderful boyfriend, Gerard? Gerard, Gerard, Gerard, Gerard, Gerard, Gerard.

Gerard, Jay. Jay. Can I call him Jay? I just want to keep this pronouncing it. Well, I was just going to say we don't want to mispronounce the name the whole time. So Jay was over at the house and just chilling in the basement. It was around 5 p.m. and I needed to go to work. Jay was from out of town at the time and when I decided to go to work, he would just hang

out at the house while I was gone. I gave him a passionate kiss goodbye and off to work I went. Good for you giving him a passionate kiss goodbye before you go to work. So sexy. This morning I literally like pushed through away from me and got out of bed and then like smooched his forehead and I thought that was sweet. Passionate, passionate. At this time I was a waitress at a restaurant and I was restaurant, and I was always super busy for supper.

I was still there only an hour when my phone started going off the fucking hook, call after call. Normally I wouldn't answer my phone during work, but I noticed that it was Jay and I thought something might be wrong with him calling me so many times in a row. So I answered him and asked if he was okay. Jay said, Ashley, I am coming to your work. I cannot stay at this house alone. Whoa. What would be the first thing to come to your work. I cannot stay at this house alone. Whoa.

What would be the first thing to come to your mind if somebody said that to you? I'd be stressed. I'd be like, what happened at the house? Yeah, I'd be like, what, more context. You got to give me a little something. Yeah, confused out of my mind, I asked him why. So you're in Alina.

There you go. He proceeded to tell me that he was just on the couch watching some TV with our house cat, stormy on his lap. Stormy, I have to stormy, you look like mommy, baby. Have you heard that? Nope. It's a Kylie Jenner thing, it's like,

okay. So it's like, what? It's a TikTok satin. I'm surprised you haven't gotten it. Actually, I was just gonna say, you're surprised my for you page hasn't given me that. No, I'm not. Stormy apparently got up from J's lap

and looked into my room to the right of J. The room was dark and Stormy just sat in the door frame as if he was looking at something. After a few moments, the stand-up closet I had in the room crashed to the floor with clothes flying everywhere. It scared the fuck out of both Stormy and J and Stormy began running all around the house in a panic. J said that he sat there for a good

long while just out of disbelief. He quickly picked up all my clothes that were thrown, you could tell that he put them away in a hurry. And left the house. That was so cute that he actually like straightened up your clothes. I can tell you with full certainty that Drew would have ran the fuck out of there, clothes be damned. John would have put the clothes away very neatly. Absolutely. More neatly than they had been put away be damned. John would have put the clothes away very neatly. Absolutely. More neatly than they had been put away the first time he would have like color coded them

and then thrown some away or donated some. Not in the right spot. No, not in the spot that I put them. He would totally change it and then he would donate a bunch. The pink bags everywhere. He's a minimalist. That's another TikTok sound. When he came to the

restaurant, excuse me, to tell the story again, I just could not help just to laugh. What else was I supposed to fucking do? And the thought of a ghost eating my entire closet on the floor was just fucking hilarious. It is pretty funny. Didn't think this was amazing at all. This stand-up closet had never fallen on its own before or after this night. There were too many clothes on the rack for it to just topple over on its own. Honestly, when he told me what happened, I was more interested than scared. It had never done anything to me, maybe it just didn't like my taste and clothes. What the fuck man, everybody's got an opinion nowadays.

In May of 2021, it was time to graduate and move to the big city of Lincoln, Nebraska. Nothing has been thrown or moved since October, so we're doing alright. While going through so much fucking random shit I'd accumulated over the years, I noticed something odd in the storm shelter, which is a room right next to my bedroom. I see random bags of clothes, books, decorations, and glass, shattered glass, all over the floor. There happened to be a light fixture right above that shattered glass.

Somehow, sometime within the past month of me going through everything to move, the light bulb unscrewed itself out of the ceiling and fell to the floor. Now I don't know about you, but I've never had a light bulb do that before. No. Not really a normal occurrence,

especially when I rarely ever go into that room. I would like to think it was one last to raw from our ghost before we all moved out of the house. How close that. We now refer to the ghost as Quinn. Cute. We do not know if they're a boy or a girl, so we keep it gender neutral. I often talk about Quinn when I get together with my college roommates and kind of miss my stuff being for a year. Life was more exciting with Quinn around. Since the new people moved into that house, I wonder if Quinn is living with them or giving them any hell LOL. I really hope so. This was a shorter story, but I hope it made for a good story. I love you guys, and thank you for reading. Have a very happy spooky season, friends. Your morbid friend, Ashley. Ashley, that was

like an adorable ghost story. I like that Quinn. That one was really cute. I like it a lot. I like that Quinn you have And you know what? We're gonna go right into a pretty gnarly story. Okay This one is called the time my leg got straight Zooted at my 18th birthday party a stabbing parable your leg got suited I think you got stabbed. I don't think your leg got high. Hey, fam. Here's the story of the time. I got stabbed Homegirl went to town the doc is nine pages, but five of those pictures are pages are pictures That's okay. Also, I think this is right up Asha's alley for reading purposes too bad. I'm reading it We're the same age and my cousin is the same age as Elena. That's kind of fun. Oh, that's joy. Embo

Let's see. I hope I do it justice because you will. You know. All right. Hey, fam. I feel I'm reading, though. I want to start off by saying that I love your podcast and I just can't get enough.

My cousin introduced me to your show while we were on a COVID conscious road trip out west. I graduated college in the dead center of the 2020 COVID lockdown, and this was our celebration months and months later, eating ourselves into nature. Yeehaw, I guess. My cousin is 35 and I'm 23. I love that.

We're both top tier true crime junkies and I consider us to be sole sister best friends. So I feel pretty confident saying that there's no other duo out there who vibes more with your podcast than us. We're really picking up what you're putting down to say the least. Are you smelling what we're stepping in? I love you guys already. I could tell you stories

about our road trip and how we repeatedly felt like we might be zoned out of existence in some sketchy places along the way. But for this email, I'm taking you back Raven Simone style to 2015 on the night of my 18th birthday party. That's the Raven. It's the future, actually. The Winter. She recently came out and it's not Raven Simone. It's Raven Simone, yay. I had no idea. Yeah, I guess she said that like Disney

didn't like how that sounded or something. That's fucked up. That's real fucked up. You can't rename people, but these are very... All right, Raven Simone style to 2015. On the night of my 18th birthday, the main reason I decided to send this story is because of Amy's February listener tale

about being shot and what it felt like. I really resonated with what she went through and decided to go ahead and send my story in. Now, no one was deliberately trying to murder me, but I came pretty fucking close to dying, so I figured this story might make the cut. I just typed it out and realized it's accidentally a pun for my life.

L.A.O. Quick aside for legal reasons, you can call me embo. Only because I have some thoughts on this period of my life and since there were lawyers involved at the time, I don't want anyone coming for me. Anyway, here's my story about getting stabbed at my birthday party. Oh, it's your birthday and you can cry too. Yeah, here's my story about getting stabbed at my birthday party. Oh, it's your birthday and you can cry too.

Yeah, this is Q the rainbow tunnel vision. In 2015, I was throwing my annual Halloween birthday combo party, hey, hey to my fellow Scorpios. Looking back on it now, I was extremely type A when it came to planning these things out because I always made sure that every guest had two people there that they knew. I guess you could call me the spider woman

of party planning, weaving a web of friendships and making sure everyone felt comfortable or just a quirky gal with quirky undiagnosed ADHD. That's what TikTok wants you to think. Well, not too long after the party started, things got pretty damn uncomfortable and hectic for everyone. Oh, no.

Some friends and I were playing a game like Hackie Sack with a balloon, hitting it from person to person and making sure it didn't land on the ground. Oh, you mean keepy upby? Where are my blue e-fans at? That's what we play in this house. We play keepy upby.

T.T., will you play keepy upby with me? I love it. The amount of times I hear that. At one point, I lunged and kicked at the balloon with my foot and ended up getting myself nifed. I didn't really see what happened. I only have a blurry memory of the motions that landed me in that position,

but I can remember exactly what it felt like. I want to give a quick trigger warning for my pals out there with freak accident trauma before I explain. Basically, when I first felt off, I thought someone had punched me in the leg. Then, when I noticed the large pocket knife on the ground, I thought someone had accidentally thrown it at me and it bounced off my leg. Then I felt my ankle starting to get very, very warm. When I looked down, my ankle was covered in my own blood, which was streaming

down my leg and pouring on the floor. I can totally vouch for the fight, flight, or freeze phenomenon, and believe me, I went into commando fight mode. I immediately sat on on the floor and started yelling orders at my friends, directing them to wear the Dekakfaan towels, and how they could hold my leg up high and wrap it tightly with the towels to stop bleeding. Good for you. That's incredible that you had the wherewithal to do that. I love this. I even tapped into Keeper of the Peace Mode, making sure everyone else was doing okay. You're like, do you have a drink? You need some popcorn? All right. You are still the hostess with the most with the morest. No, no, I'm fine. Really, it's going to be okay. Who's calling the ambulance? Can

someone call my mom? Oh, yeah, my parents were out buying more pizzas for the party when this shit went down. They were literally gone like 15 minutes. Parents nightmare. Do we know how old you were when this happened? That's 18th birthday. Oh, yep, okay. So there I was chilling out maxing out, relaxing all cool and a pool of my own blood. Staring wistfully at my crush. No. I was talking to the ambulance dispatcher and making me fall even more in love with him because of some please save me complex. I didn't even know I had.

And trying to convince my friends that I was totally fine because it didn't even hurt that much. Wait, that's like your dream, like that would be like one of my dreams though, my crush talking to the ambulance driver. Like I think I have a please save me complex. There you go, I think we all kind of do. I think everybody does, just care for me.

Deep down inside everybody has it and it comes out in situations like, yeah. During this time everyone was confused. I'm still confused, but the story my friend circulated was that my boy scout friend was using his large pocket knife to cut open a bag of glow sticks and his hand slipped and hit me. Now the glow sticks had a tear strip,

so either he was being completely over the top and wanted to use his big boy toy, or it's not really what happened. To be honest, I kind of feel like maybe he was trying to pop the balloon to be funny, and it ended up in a not funny turn of events, but that's neither here nor there for legal reasons. Eventually the ambulance arrived at my house and I

got to have the rock star exit of being carried by a mega hot EMT to the gurney outside because it wouldn't fit through the door of my house. Yikes. I remember bits and pieces of my ambulance ride but didn't think too much of it until recently. For one, when the paramedic asked me how I was feeling, I replied, oh, I don't know. Wunky? And then promptly after that, I had to muster all my remaining energy to explain what the hell Wunky meant to this poor woman who was just trying to do her job. She's like, so I want to scale up one to ten a Wunky.

Or you're feeling. On a scale of one to Wunky, where are you? I also remember the ambulance stopping halfway down my street, which really confused and bothered me since we only lived like six minutes away from the hospital. I want to wonky, where are you? I also remember the ambulance stopping halfway down my street, which really confused and bothered me since we only lived like six minutes away from the hospital. It wasn't until recently that I realized they had to stop because I was literally dying.

Yeah. My stats were dropping like crazy, and they had to take a beat to regain control of my leg bleeding out. Oh my God. I'd like to thank my local EMTs for not explaining that that was happening to me at the time because I would have been gone so.

Imagine if you're a friend who was just like trying to show off his big boy toy, murdered you and your own party by accident in this free-backed, like you were dying. That's wild. Meanwhile, my younger sister was riding up front with the ambulance driver and the dispatch radio was blasting 911 calls and accident reports from all over the country.

I feel really bad for, or counting, excuse me. I feel really bad for her because I know my experience was fucked up, but wow, she was really going through it too. She's like, what's going on in this town? Also, they made an exception to let her ride with us because she was a minor, and I was only allowed to be taken to the hospital without my parents because I had turned 18

two days prior to the incident. Thank goodness. If it had been even a day before my birthday, there's nothing they would have legally been able to do, which is absolutely whack in my opinion. Yeah, like sorry, we can't save you because your parents are not here. Your mom and dad aren't here.

Also, she was probably, I can't like think when she's saying right now how she can barely remember parts of this because she was literally bleeding out. Yeah. That's what, when I had the girls that happened to me, and I remember only bits and pieces. So it's a weird thing when you think back to it because you're like, oh, I remember this. Yeah. And I remember this, like little like patches come out.

Yeah. It's so weird. It's like shock. Yeah. Anyway, we finally got to the hospital where my parents were waiting for us. And a small group of my closest friends, closely followed closely behind, Crescento. My emergency room visit was pretty weird. And I only remember bits and pieces. But I do remember that doctor is asking, is she always this pale? I swear that was the same thing. No, I didn't. And the answer was, no. Not gray. I's usually not gray, usually pale, but not gray.

And my friends explaining that they used more than three towels to clean up all the blood I had blocked. So no, I wasn't just an enemic ginger with a colonesque skin tone. Also, I can't remember the name of the procedure, but I was putting the same machines as Amy, where the text let you, you know, it'll feel like you're peeing, but don't worry about it. Is that a cat scan? Is that a key-up scan? I don't know what happened there.

It must have been whatever. They might have been like a spinal or something. I think I'm not really sure. I think it was a cat scan and they were like, it's going to feel like you're peeing, but you're not. Maybe. Honestly, I don't remember that part of Amy's story. So I don't know what machine that was, but you're probably right.

And let me tell you, I was worried about it. I really came out of the machine in my woozy state of consciousness like, listen, I know you said I wouldn't pee, but I'm totally not sure, and I'm really sorry if I did. It was definitely one of the most uncomfortable feelings in the world.

Yeah, because not only if it was like a cat scan, not only does it feel like you're literally peeing yourself, it burns. Like your throat burns. Oh, yeah only does it feel like you're literally peeing yourself, it burns. Like your throat burns. Oh, yeah, I didn't like it at all. That's stressful. I, you're probably right, because I was more thinking of like childbirth when they,

when they give you the shot and the spine, and you're like, oh, I'm peeing. They were probably trying to see if she had like injured any of that tendons or anything like that. Fast forward to the next day, and the painkillers, the hospital loaded me up on were beginning to wear off. My mom hadn't gone to the pharmacy yet because I was feeling fine,

so I didn't have any medicine to take when shit hit the fan and the pan. The pan? The pan? The pain hit me all at once. Oh. The ambulance had already been called to my house earlier that morning, because I passed out while trying to crutch my way to the bathroom. Who knows?

But I played it off cool to the EMTs and made sure to let them know I was fine. When the pain kicked in a few hours later though, they were called again. But I played it off cool to the EMTs and made sure to let them know I was fine. When the pain kicked in a few hours later though, they were called again. And my common collected repose flew out the window. I remember just being curled up on the couch crying and clutching my favorite stuffed animal. Which ended up escorting me to the hospital. I'm pretty sure the same mega hot EMT who had carried me out the night before carried me out of the house again.

Only this time I had my stuffed tiger with me the whole time. Big ego boost for an 18 year old girl, let me tell ya. Now if you've watched John Mulaney stand-ups, of course. Then you might remember his story about the Batman nurse. Oh my God, yes I do. I'm pretty fucking sure I met that guy's twin brother because I was helped by a bubbly gay male nurse with exactly the same energy.

For example, example. Do you want to say I just like took that so long. When he came in to give me pain medicine, he explained it to Sing Song voice, oh honey, we're going to get you fixed right up. I'm here to give you the good stuff. It's basically heroin but legal. Thank God my mom wasn't in the room. After that I was so relieved and

shlumped from the medicine that I took a little nappy nap and let the doctors do their thing. I'm going to try and make the rest short because holy damn this is longer than anyone needs, but hopefully my trauma has been entertaining in the least. It has. After all of this, the doctors found out my tendon had been cut. New they were looking for that. And I needed to have a graft tendon put in from a cadaver. Woohoo, dead body parts. After that, my leg was sewn up and everything went back to normal.

Oh, that's so weird to like know that you have like a dead person's thing in your body, but like, we're eat, but I could help you. Well, until the graft tendon got infected, and I had to spend months and months in the hospital in wound care and having multiple new surgeries to take it back out and fix everything. Oh, no. They ultimately decided to not put in any other donor tendons in because they were afraid my leg wouldn't recover.

So now I'm missing half a tendon and can no longer lift my right foot. Whoa. And I, you should probably say this last part. Was good. There you go. Eventually, after upwards of 11 surgeries, eight months of in and out hospital stays and lots of physical therapy,

I was able to walk again. Hell yeah. But you can't raise your right eye. I know that must be so weird. Like, just that meat, because you must be able to walk, obviously. So if I like the tendon that would pull that foot up. Like flex.

Yeah, that would flex that foot. Why? Yeah. I missed half of my senior year of high school, but I recovered in time to walk a graduation and go to two proms with my crust. Oh, yeah. Who went to a different high school

and spent a lot of time coming to visit me in the hospital. Oh my God. We love her. We love her. Throughout my experience, I had an amazing support system of friends and family, and I never once felt lonely during my time spent in the hospital.

It's actually kind of weird. Hospitals used to freak me out, but now, when I visit them, I feel an overwhelming sense of calm, and I guess a feeling you might call homesickness? I don't know. What originally started as a pretty, I think, quote, unquote, pretty, 16-inch scar ended up being jagged after all the follow-up surgeries, And I was pretty insecure about it for a long time. Just like Amy in her hand, I refused to look at my leg from the night it happened until I was almost fully healed.

It nauseated me and made me feel overwhelmingly scared because it meant I wasn't okay. I would always crop it out of photos. And I remember when I went on my first college date, I was, or my first few college dates, I was always worried the people would be freaked out or grossed out by how it looked. Oh, and occasionally I even apologized for it. And it says, who is she? I don't know her. But now I'm proud of it. And I think it's gnarly and pretty damn cool. Yeah, it's a battle scar, baby. Unfortunately, Crush Guy and I didn't last through the freshman year long distance struggle,

but we're still friends and things are chill between us. Just wanted to make sure I didn't leave you guys stranded on that one. You're a real one. You are a real one. I was just about to ask, are you so with them? I skipped ahead and looked at the pictures of them at prom. What can you do?

Oh my God, I can't wait to see it. Thanks for taking the time to read my story, and I hope it makes it onto the show. So Amy and others like us can hear it. You guys are the absolute best, and I know you get this from your listeners all the time, but it's cool to be part of a group where true crime junkies are validated and weirdos like me have an outlet for wackadoo thoughts and experiences. Keep it weird but not so weird that your birthday party turns into a slasher movie,

embo. Yes, I'm attaching photos of my like for viewing, ple-de-de-de-de, a pleasure. And the Suprompex as well. I call this one one foot wonder. Oh my god, it's her in a bathing suit with just the foot out like in a one foot, a little pool. Wow. Also this one says, that is a scar. And it says, there she is. Ignore my leg hair.

There's literally nothing I could do about it. Literally no. You're beautiful. Oh my God, you and your crush are everything. Oh my goodness. You're everything. Oh my God, you and your crush are everything. Oh my goodness. You're everything. Oh, I love these. And then it says, by the way, because there's like a crazy zigzag pattern of like where the stitches were, it says, by the way, the crazy zigzagging pattern of the stitches was because during the second round of surgeries, they had to get rid of a lot of infected muscle and

pull my left skin over together as tightly as possible. Oh my god. Oh my god. Wow, you are a, you're a Titan. You are. And you know what, like, you're scarred now. It's like, it healed incredible. I don't think I would even notice that if I was walking past you.

If I did, I'd be like, wow, that girl's really cool. What happened? That's an incredible, incredible healing right there. And both of your prom dresses were so gorgeous. Oh my goodness. Wow, what about your cuties? You guys. That was a crazy story for real.

The fact that you were just playing Kepy Uppy. I know. And you kicked in the air and then you just got your legs sliced open. That's wild. That's absolutely bonk hair. But damn, you know how to tell a story. You guys all do, these were incredible. Yeah.

What do you say? We do one more just to finish it off right, Elena. Let's do one more. Okay, this one is called Fun Listener Halloween Tale where my friend met Michael Myers. Wow. How could we not read that? And, oh, I went to the other place too.

Oh no, I'm good, okay. You're good. Size! I have never sent in a story to a podcast before, so I'm a little nervous, and I hope I get this right. You can't even get it wrong, don't even worry. Never. I have a super fun lighthearted Halloween tale.

Buckle up, it's crazy. There's a surprise ending. Ooh, we love a twist. Here we go. I live in San Diego, California, and there is a well-known hiking spot called Elphin Forest. Oh, I read about this place.

Oh, you did. Yeah, for spooky forests. It's rumored to be haunted. Yep, it is. Okay, I'm 26 years old, so this is like back between 2009, 2012, because they found out that it was haunted during their high school years.

There you go. I'm not sure if this rumor is still circulating, but if it isn't, bring it back, Jen. Let's go. Anyways, it was really common for people to go there to smoke circulating, but if it isn't, bring it back, Jenzy. Let's go. Anyways, it was really common for people to go there to smoke weed, drink, and hang out, but especially during Halloween. I'm not sure why the fuck we thought this was smart, because the idea of being higher drunk in the great outdoors in the dark sounds terrifying as an adult, but nonetheless,

it was a thing. So one Halloween night in 2010, I get this really panicked phone call from my best friend. We'll call her Taylor. Taylor was telling me about how something insane happened at Elfen Forest. She told me that her and about six other friends decided to go there and you guessed it, smoke weed, drink and hang out. They were having a really great night until they got a little turned around because they went off trail.

Also, full disclaimer, this is by no way an actual forest. Like, this is a cluster of trees and a canyon. For San Diego, it's a forest, but think oak trees surrounding a cute little creek that stretches out for a few miles. But adorable. All right, back to our story. They got lost.

It was dark. Everyone was increasingly getting weirded out. Eventually, they got back to the car. And as they're walking back to the car, one of the boys will call him Andrew, stops dead in his tracks. The group is confused and asks why he stopped, but he doesn't answer. After a few moments of silence, they see what he sees, and they are absolutely stunned and fear. There is a man, and a Michael Myers mask, standing in the dirt parking lot, holding a fucking knife. That's just Michael Myers. That's actually just Michael Myers. That's Halloween. On Halloween. That literally is it. Halloween. Halloween. Now somehow they were calm at first,

thinking that it was another friend in the group playing a joke. But after making a quick count of everything, they realized that it is indeed not someone in the friend group. Needless to say, they book it to the car. Everyone's screaming, crying, there's it all around total panic. The Michael Myers dude is running to the fucking car. Does he not know?

No. You're not supposed to run, Michael. You're out of character. But luckily, unlike the real Michael Myers who moves ungodly slow and fast, Taylor and the gang all get away. I'm glad. They end up going back into town

and stopping at a gas station, or some shit I totally don't remember. But what I do remember is Taylor telling me this, when they were stopped, a car pulled up and started circling their car. This guy's hand was out the driver's side window, holding a knife. No mask, but it was too too dark to see his face. Everyone freaks out again. And they drive back to tailors. I'm

like, wow, this Halloween was a bust. Yeah, I'd be like, fuck that. I mean, being 15 year, oh, my voice just cracks. Yeah, that puberty. Maybe. Being 15 years old and hearing Taylor tell me the story, I was mortified, but this is where it gets funny and weird. So fast forward from 2010 to 2012, silly bands are in. Wow, was that really when silly bands were in? I feel like they were in before that. I don't even know what that is. Oh, you don't, did you not remember silly bands like from my generation?

No, I was getting married in 2012. I don't think I was around silly bands. Yeah, no, and that's the thing. What are they? Silly bands, they were like little animals that were like bracelets. But it was like animals or like, I don't remember if they I don't even know who to watch.

But they were cool. I don't honestly, they were never really cool. But it was more when I was in like fresh manure or like even like middle school. Yeah, I don't know. I never know. I never heard of them. Yeah, silly bands.

They got banned at my school actually at my middle school. What are they weapons? No, but like with people who are getting distracted. Oh, I was like, what is people like to treat them and stuff like that all the time? Like Pokemon cards. Yeah, exactly. When I was in school to, um, Pogs, you lost me there.

Yep. Um, there. Yep. Wow. Yep. But it's 2012. Silly Vans are in. You can't wait for the final Twilight movie to come out. You still have a Tumblr. Whoa.

That's how we're made it. Well, you were excited for the new Twilight movie. We liked Twilight. Oh, yeah. All right. So we're all graduated and was with an old high school friend named Hazel. We were spending a ton of time together during Halloween, in particular,

Benjing's scary movies. One night we were going to her house with two boys I'd never hung out with before to watch some movie about the Jersey Devil. While we were watching the movie, something about the plot maybe think of what Taylor had told me a couple years ago. I told Hazel and the boys and Hazel was like, holy shit, that is terrifying! While the boys began to laugh hysterically. Huh, I was super confused.

After laughing, one of them explained how they would dress up like Michael Myers and Rick Halloween, and go to Elphan Forest to scare people. Oh no. My mind was so blown, I had no idea what to say, but we called Taylor to tell her, we all had a good laugh about it. But he chased them to the car with a knife,

it's like, dude, I think it's going too far. That's how accidents happen. That's a good way to get yourself killed. Yeah, or a violation, a very least. After the laugh, though, I asked them why they would also choose to follow their friends to the gas station with a knife and how that's super uncool. Like this whole thing is uncool to be honest.

We're hearing people in the middle of the forest. Come on now. You don't have a TV show. God damn it. You don't have a prank TV show. The boys went quiet and said, yeah, that part wasn't us. We stayed in the parking lot the rest of the night

and just kept scaring kids. Oh my gosh. That's terrifying. It was a wild Halloween wherever the fuck you were. And that's the part that gets me. Who the fuck followed them to the gas station with a knife? We'll never know.

Dun, dun, dun, dun. Damn. Elfin Force, to this day, scares the shit out of me. My boyfriend and I go quite often because it does have good hiking during the day like sane people. And we will hear human sounding footsteps following us nearby with zero sign of a person around.

It sounds nothing like the scurrying of an animal. I promise you. I often feel like I'm being watched there. It's only happened a couple of times, but needless to say, I avoid it during the Halloween season. Yeah, as you should, apparently. You definitely should. I hope you enjoyed my tale.

I really love your podcast, and it's been getting me through this cluster, fuck of a year, that we call 2020. Whoa, don't worry, we're in 2022 now. I mean, we got through it. I mean, it still sucks But we're happy spooky season weirdo Shane say it like Shane, but I'm a girl Shane that was a good one to end on because it was like oh, that's funny and like spooky Halloween fun But then it was like a weird twist. Who is that person? Yeah, like what the fuck was that Halloween was wild for you all back then.

Damn, you guys are outrageous with these tales. Outrageous. I do that every time we say outrageous lately. I'm gonna mad at the party. Outrageous when I read a listener tale. Wow, you're welcome. Gotta go. Yeah, with that being said,

we do hope that you keep listening. And we hope you keep it. We're. But that's the way that you start singing Britney on your podcast. Like anybody asked you to. Bye. Hey, Prime Members! You can listen to Morvid, Early, and Add Free on Amazon Music. Download the Amazon Music app today, or you can listen Add Free with Wondery Plus and Apple

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