Mum's The Word! The Parenting Podcast - A Big Update from Ashley James!

Episode Date: January 17, 2022

In this special episode Ashley wanted to catch up on some of the biggest moments over the last month, including the decision to stop breastfeeding, Alfies first birthday and the events that unfolded over Christmas time. We want to hear from you! Please do get in touch with a question or a message at [e-mail]--- A Create Podcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Well, hello. I am fresh off a plane, so I feel like I always complain about being tired. But today is an extra special type of tired because I've just done a very, very long flight with Alf. But more on that later. I basically have no guests today because I feel like so much has happened since Christmas. So the last episode I did was with Tommy. And by the way, thank you, everyone, for all the lovely messages around it. Because when I say that I had to emotionally blackmail Tommy to do that, he was so nervous. And he was also really nervous about the response it would get. he was also really nervous about the response it would get. I feel like I take for granted that people give feedback on what I do and what I share every single day. But Tommy was like, I feel like you should have given me the questions in advance and I could have prepared.

But anyway, it was all good. And you've all been really nice. So who knows, maybe he will feature on another podcast episode again. I feel like it was good even for our relationship just to like have a little check in. Maybe we all need to do that. Just do like, just do a little check in, get people to ask questions and then you ask them as if you don't know what they are. But anyway, so we recorded that just before Christmas and what a Christmas and New Year. I don't know how you guys found Christmas and New Year, but for us, I feel like it's been 10 years since that Christmas time. We were all so worried about COVID and whether or not we'd be able to have family Christmases.

Were there going to be restrictions? Were there not going to be restrictions? Was everyone going to be able to get together? I feel like lateral flow tests were like the advent calendar of 2021. Every single day we were like, is it positive? Is it negative? Oh, it's negative. Good. Family can still come. We had my mom, my dad, my brother, my sister, her husband, her son, my nephew, Jasper, my gran, and my great uncle all coming for Christmas and miraculously we all remained COVID free and then my dad ended up in A&E on Christmas Eve because he started getting blurred vision we called 111 by the way my dad is like your typical northern man that I mean his arm could fall off and he'd not complain so the fact that he was voicing concern over it,

we were like, right, get on the phone to 111. So he had to go in to the delightful Essex hospitals on Christmas Eve and then had to go back for more tests on Christmas day. And then Alfie's first Christmas, we've all been so excited and I woke up and from 8 a.m. toam to 7pm, he was throwing up about five times an hour. It was honestly horrible. So we ate Christmas dinner or lunch rather,

that's my northern coming out. We ate Christmas lunch really early so that my dad could get to his doctor's appointment. And by the time he came back, Alf and I had to call 111 because of his sickness bug. His nappy was dry, which we were told means that they could be suffering from dehydration. And so it got to 7pm and we were like, right, call 111 again. And we were sent off to A&E and I had to spend Christmas evening in hospital with Alf. I thought they would honestly think that I was being like overly cautious. It's hard, isn't it, with a baby? Because I don't know about you guys, but I never, ever want to like pester the NHS because we all hear about people wasting their time. And I'm always like, sorry to waste your time, but I just don't

know if my baby's okay or not. And even when I went into A&E, I was like, I'm always like, sorry to waste your time, but I just don't know if my baby's okay or not. And even when I went into A&E, I was like, I'm so sorry to bother you on Christmas day. And they were like, no, no, no, he's really ill and needs fluids. So I had to watch him get a drip and he had to have a little x-ray. And then I just slept next to him all night, which was horrible, but best place I could have been with him. So that was fine. But part of me was like, I had all these dreams of playing board games and it would have been our first family Christmas. And obviously my sister and my nephew were waiting at home.

And you know, when you like really envision, that's my problem, I think. I like have this, I really fantasize scenarios. And then when they don't happen, I'm like, no. But the main thing is alpha's all right we got home on boxing day we still had two more days with the family and then dun dun dun I got the sickness bug can you believe it so from boxing day to the 28th I was bed bound being sick every hour or so and just 12 hours later Tommy got it as well so I've honestly I

wouldn't say I've never been so ill in my life but I've never felt I've never felt so ill so quickly in my life it just came out over like out of nowhere bear in mind by this time I was feeling better wow it's hard to parent it's basically hard to have children when you're sick and I feel like that that's the bit of parenting that's really hard I mean a lot of it's hard to parent. It's basically hard to have children when you're sick. And I feel like that's the bit of parenting that's really hard. I mean, a lot of it's hard, but do you know what I mean? You're like, can someone come and take this kid away? Oh, it's mine. I am responsible for it. So that was a really hard couple of days. And amazingly, my sister, Angus and Jasper agreed to stay to look after Alf. Otherwise, I honestly don't know what we would have done. Like, there was a really bleak moment when I went to go be sick and Tommy ran in to be sick and we were literally sick together. But that's a bit grim. You probably don't want to hear about

that. So I did something. I'm always very spontaneous when I feel like, oh, well, that was rubbish. So I booked a really last minute holiday. The only difference being when I used to do it, it was usually because I'd got dumped or ghosted or some part of my tragic dating life back in the day. And you're like, catch flights, not feelings. Whereas with motherhood, it doesn't work like that because you catch a flight, but you still have to be a mother so I didn't really like quite vouch for that so at the beginning I was a bit like oh no is this going to be a nightmare because what I've omitted from this Christmas drama is that um Alf started really biting me on the 23rd of December notice how I know the date because it was so traumatic this biting saga so he's kind of bitten

in the past by the way I was talking about biting the boob biting the nipple so biting whilst breastfeeding so he's done it a little bit in the past and I'm not really reacted and we've ridden through it but this it was like it it felt malicious obviously I know it wasn't malicious because he's like a beautiful little now one year old baby but it felt malicious. Obviously, I know it wasn't malicious because he's like a beautiful little now one year old baby. But it felt malicious. Like sometimes he wasn't even feeding. He was like crying for the boob and then he would bite and then he would tear. And it was honestly on top of being sick, it was a lot.

So when we got on the plane, he carried on doing it. so when we got on the plane he carried on doing it so my my tip that I was given for flying is that you breastfeed on takeoff and landing or bottle feed whatever you do um because it helps stop their ears pop so I was like yeah I'm ready for this we take off biting and by this point by the way I had bite marks like actual war wounds so breastfeeding became something that was so stressful. I honestly felt like I may as well have gone and swam with some piranhas. That's how I felt putting my boob in his mouth. I was like, I kept putting it in and taking it out before he closed his mouth. And Tom was like, you're teasing him. I was like, I'm not, I'm absolutely terrified. So at the beginning, I was like, have I made this terrible spontaneous

mistake of booking a holiday? But I'm glad that we did it in hindsight. So I was looking for like where I could find like flights, last minute deals, direct flights, because that's another thing. A lot of places they were indirect. And I managed to find flights to Mauritius. And amazingly, because I have companion vouchers to use with the um the Amex BA card I think it's a BA card but anyway had these companion vouchers we managed to get a really good deal on flights um so we just went for it and um at the beginning we got there actually on New Year's Eve which is so nice because that's actually mine and tom's two year anniversary i was going to say three years but it's the third new year that we spent

together so i think i'm i mean i'm confusing myself with the maths here um so we managed to get in just for like 6 p.m on new year's eve we did new year there were fireworks it was so lovely um but the biting so oh my god I don't know if any of you have experienced breastfeeding and biting or maybe it's something you will experience but just to reassure anyone apparently not all babies do it so I pray for you that your baby never does it but all the expert advice because I did look into it said don't react but I mean I like to think I've got quite high pain threshold how do you not react when a baby clamps down with their teeth I don't know if you if you can do that and not react you're a bigger person than I am I was

like so dramatic and it was causing me to like really hate who I was as a mum because I started to really shout at Alf because it was so sore and I was like so on edge and then he'd get really upset and then Tommy and I started arguing because he'd get annoyed with me for shouting at Alf and it was just this horrible horrible thing and it really made me think like, what kind of message is it to tell someone not to react to pain? And also what kind of boundaries are you setting? Yes, babies are too young to really understand, but they do say that you start with them as you mean to go on. And I was thinking like, what am I teaching him that it's just okay to bite me and there'd be no consequences. So anyway, I came to the decision about two or three days into the holiday that it was time to stop breastfeeding. And I mean,

he was almost a year old. I was actually really emotional about it. Every time I thought about it, it made me want to cry. And for context, as a lot of you will know but for anyone who doesn't know alf and i have co-slept pretty much since the beginning it was never ever my intention i had a lovely snoo which i was so excited to use but i think just a combination of him being an absolutely massive baby he was born 9.5 pounds and the injuries that i had from childbirth it was just too hard to like keep picking him up and putting him down and I don't know I just started doing it to be honest like it just kind of felt right and I never stopped even though I said when we move house he's going to be in the cot when he gets to six months he's going to be in the cot and it just never happened. So because of co-sleeping, I'd kind of let him use my

boob as a dummy, which sounds a bit weird, I guess, but it was just like a comfort. It became a comfort thing because a lot of the time he'd feed in the night and I'd fall asleep because he'd be next to me. So it kind of just became a habit. So I was like, how on earth do I stop breastfeeding? But we had this really bad night in Mauritius where it all came to a head and um he basically he he wasn't even trying to feed he was just biting and so then I'd shout at him and he would be hysterical and he'd like crying crying cry I'd be hugging him Tommy would be hugging him we'd take him for a walk like we did everything to show him love and he just kept crying so then I was like right let me try again give him the boob

he'd bite same thing again so I was like he's not even actually feeding he's just biting um and by the way just to preface this we'd given Calpol and ibuprofen and um teething gel so even though I strongly suspect it was teeth um well it was teeth because he's actually grown three teeth since he's been on holiday two at the top next to the top two and one at the bottom next to the bottom two that makes sense so bless him he was in a lot of pain and he was obviously teething but my nipples were not the teething toy that I wanted him to use so this horrible horrible night I was in tears Alf was in tears I was just like do you know what enough's enough I've tried for two weeks it's not it's not becoming an like it's not an enjoyable

experience anymore I was dreading it I've given it a good shot he's nearly won like it's time to stop now enough because I want to be able to like be a good mum and hug him and cuddle him when he's going through teething pain not shout at him for biting me and he just wasn't getting it I thought after two weeks of saying Alfie no biting he might be like you know what maybe I shouldn't bite her but he's too young to understand he didn't get it at all so we decided to stop cold turkey breastfeeding thank the lord that I'd brought my pump away so that's what we're kind of still doing but that that first night of no boob I was absolutely terrified he started crying cuddled him like oh do you know what it was just like so horrible I think I put it up on Instagram on my um on my stories of like me in absolute floods of tears which I'll be honest

it is always weird to like document yourself crying like when you're crying you're like I know I'll document this now but I wanted to remind myself of like the emotions and the tough parts that you go through because I don't know maybe I'm weird like what do you guys think is it weird to take a picture of yourself crying maybe it is but I just wanted to like remember the emotions and also show that it's not all like it's just not all rainbows and I know like obviously mums know that but I feel like with breastfeeding you only really it's it's kind of like almost like seen as like oh she's attention seeking or she's just doing like she's showing off or something like that but I was like oh my god nobody tells you how to stop and no one tells you the emotions that are like involved in it so

yeah it was a lot that night I had to keep getting up and just like I was crying on the bathroom floor like I feel like the only time I've cried like that is when I got cheated on by my first ever boyfriend um I've honestly not felt emotion like it for so long but the following night weirdly it was actually fine like he cried a little bit to get to sleep but obviously we were cuddling him and he's never taken a bottle and he's never taken a dummy and by the way not through trying uh not through lack of trying sorry he just never really like did it and even though we still try with a dummy he kind of like bites it a bit and spits it out he's never really got the sucking part so he loves these little tommy tippy cups so i just put like pump breast milk with the lv and put it into the green tommy tippy cup so that's now his milk cup and his blue cup and

red cup is water cup and that's actually worked really well because he now knows which one the milk is and but i just give him that at night. And even when he woke up throughout the night, like normally I would just like shove a boob in his mouth. This time I give him the milk and usually he'll go back to sleep and he like cuddles up to me. Or if he doesn't want the milk, then I give him the water and then that will usually do it. And for anyone that is like thinking or worrying about stopping breastfeeding,

it was hell that one day but like it's been surprisingly easier than I thought to go through such a big transition I actually feel really good about it because a lot of people warned me that you can get something called pwd post weaning depression and obviously I've spoken a lot about my mental health in this podcast and like how I don't know whether it's postnatal depression, lockdown depression, just life change, depression or what. But as you know, I have been on a journey. And so when people start saying, by the way, just let you know, when you stop breastfeeding, your hormones really drop. I was like, Christ, can't like, could I get any lower? And actually, do you know know what I feel like the cloud has lifted um and yes

I'm also very conscious that I was on holiday so let's be honest like it's very easy to be happy in the sunshine but I feel like I was ready and I think because I really tried for those two weeks and I saw no improvement and it was becoming something that was really hellish and I think a lot of my reluctance to stop was because I worried about Alf and I didn't want Alf to be upset but it got to a point where he was upset anyway and now he's still co-sleeping although we are thinking of like now that we've done the hard bit of getting him off the boob that maybe it is time to start the transition into the cot. But I think to be honest, I would, he's still been cuddling me at night. And it's actually really nice to know that he wants mummy for like comfort and not just mummy because she's got a pair of boobs. So for anyone worried about like the bond, I still feel it. But also,

I feel it even more because I feel like it's for me and not just my boobies. Welcome to Paranormal Activity with me, Yvette Fielding, a brand new podcast bringing together people's real ghost, extraterrestrial and paranormal stories, as well as getting some inside details from those who study the supernatural. I'll be listening through your paranormal stories every week and try to understand them as well as chatting about my own encounters with an occasional paranormal investigator too. You can find us wherever you get your podcasts from including Apple Podcasts, Spotify and Acastast just search for paranormal activity with yvette fielding and i also just want to say thank you to everyone who reached out to me on instagram with like encouragement and support and advice because

it was all very very much appreciated on those two very very very difficult days and like I said to anyone worried about stopping hopefully this helps you give you the confidence to like do what you feel is right because my intuition did say like time stop and I was right because he seems to be sleeping better than ever again he had a swimming pool and the sun shines so let's see now that we're back home he's also going to be slightly jet-lagged because we're four hours behind in England so let's see how the next few nights go and because I stopped breastfeeding it also means now that like Tommy and I can share the load a little bit more so I actually feel a better, which is also why I wanted to kind of

do this podcast alone today, because I feel like so much has happened. That set like seems so huge. Now when I talk about it back, I'm almost like, oh, it's not a big deal. But it did all feel like such a big deal at the time. And I feel like I'm feeling good. At one point in holiday, I was like, oh, maybe we should have another baby. And now I'm back. I'm like, absolutely not. So yeah, we'll see how that one goes. But I'm just really happy to feel like I've got a bit more freedom. And I'm really proud of myself to get to the point that I did and also proud of myself to make the decision that I did. Yeah, let's see. Let's see how it is now I'm back. I'm excited to like keep sharing the journey. But another major milestone is Alf is now one year old.

So we celebrated on the 9th of Jan just a couple of days ago. And do you know what everyone says, it's really emotional when they turn one, but I'll be really honest. I maybe this is like the difference in my mood as well, but I was just really excited. I feel like I'm almost like letting go of that baby chapter, which of course it's beautiful. And when you look back, I did like a little video montage for anyone that doesn't follow me on Instagram. I did like a little reel just like showing the year and it is emotional and it's beautiful and there's all these like exciting milestones but it also took a lot out of me like I've talked about a lot and I actually feel like now the cloud is lifting and I've kind of I'm like yeah I got through it Tommy and I got through it as new parents in a new relationship like we did it and yes there are challenges ahead and I know

loads of you will be thinking like mwahaha you think you got through it wait until the terrible twos wait until the toddler years and yes I know I'm not saying that I'm going to be happy forever as no I mean none of us are happy forever are we we are all going to go through ups and downs and I know that but I just feel like we did it he's a bit more independent he can play on his own for a bit longer I feel like I'm just getting a little bit of my life back which yeah so I felt like I was really happy for him to be one like it was just really nice whereas I feel like it at nine months it was a bit like oh my god he's been out with me for longer than he's been in me which sounds like a really weird thing to say but I was like my baby is now like belongs to the world more than he

belongs to me whereas now yeah it was just really nice we obviously celebrated in Mauritius Alfie loves monkeys and um we managed to see a monkey in the wild he always does the little monkey voice goes that so yeah he got to see a real life monkey we went on this little tour of the island and I mean let's be honest it was for us not for him he saw the monkey and loved it he saw the stray dogs loved them as well oh by the way is it weird not to get him a birthday present and a Christmas present because Tommy and I were like not in loggerheads I mean it wasn't that deep but he was like no we need to get him something and I was like no we don't he won't remember what is best what is a greater gift than 16 years free rent I would love that I would absolutely love to be given that as a gift right

now I was like he's gonna get free rent for the next 16 years like what a gift um originally I said 18 years and I was like actually if he turns out to be a little shit as a teenager maybe I'm gonna put their final two years on like a conditional contract to good behavior but yeah Tommy was like no no no we need to get him something but actually we got home and people people are just so generous when you have a baby aren't they it's weird I feel like when I bought a house on my own no one really really gave a shit. When I got job promotions or, you know, went to Downing Street, got invited by Theresa May to Downing Street, little brag there, for International Women's Day, no one really gave a shit.

Get pregnant? God, people go nuts. I feel like I'm obviously not married, sacrilegious, but I feel like weddings and babies, people for it don't they and it's amazing I mean I wish people celebrated other things but it's amazing because people are so kind and so lovely and everyone's been like so generous for Alf for his birthday so it made me pleased that we didn't get him a gift because he's already got a lot I'm now thinking like yeah why don't why don't we celebrate more I feel like I I'm going to start making sure I celebrate other occasions more.

I did on my Instagram a packing highlight, by the way, for anyone who is thinking of going away with a baby, everything that you will need. I mean, I don't want to say I'm an expert, but I've done it twice now, and I feel like I kind of nailed it this time. I've put a highlight. So if you go onto my profile on actually Louise James and everything that I packed is there so hopefully it is useful if you are planning on going away

and um miraculously it was a 12-hour flight home and Alf slept for 10 hours of it on me he didn't not go in the bassinet that's another another thing that we need to work on with the whole like maybe once he starts sleeping in the cot um he'll start sleeping off me but anyway it was fine I just put the hand luggage down in front of me and kind of put my legs out and then I slept on him and I know that this is not probably the most obvious tip that I'll ever give but took an eye mask who knew those were so good for sleeping I've been missing out I honestly I slept I slept pretty much 10 hours like we had a couple of wake-ups but he went straight back to sleep so I actually feel pretty fresh maybe the the future plan is just to stay on a plane

there that white noise um but anyway if you are thinking of going on holiday hopefully that's really useful and if you have any particular questions about the holiday please feel free to ask them in um whether that's on social media whether that's on whatsapp did you know that you can whatsapp us for the podcast um i don't know if you've actually had any whatsapps yet but i would love to get a voice message you could do it it's free and the number is 075-999-27537. Weird to have three nines in a number, isn't it? But yeah. And obviously, if you're listening on Apple Podcasts, please leave a five-star review if you want to and a rating.

It helps others to find us. Do you know what? It does feel really weird doing it without a guest today. I feel like I've just been like talking to myself, talking into the abyss for the whole episode. so I hope that's not just really boring and you're like oh my gosh Ashley just hasn't shut up um but I'm here I'm jet lagged and I just wanted to give you an update but I do have some really good guests lined up so uh yeah hopefully now that I am uh I'm not going to say through the harder times in motherhood because as I know that

you will all be thinking it's all ahead but I just feel I feel happier given how chaotic the biting and the hospital and all of that has been I do feel like this is a fresh start maybe this is like some of that new year new you bullshit and actually by February I'll be like nope still miserable um but I have been going through all the lovely messages and um I thought I'd read this one this week from Danielle who got in touch on the email which is askmumsthewordpod at gmail.com she said hi Ashley I've just started listening to your podcast and it's great and good to hear honest mum chat I'm a mum to two boys a five year old and a 22-month-old.

I breastfed my youngest till he was 18 months and it came to a natural end as he was teething badly and I didn't want and he didn't want to feed. I also co-sleep with him so that coupled up with lockdowns it's been hard to keep up with friendships and have recently lost a friendship as I struggle to be spontaneous and don't want to leave my sons unless it's a planned event. Friends don't understand the co-sleeping thing. I'm now only starting to get out on my own with friends and son is nearly two I was the first with my eldest only when he started sleeping in his bed I had more freedom am I wrong to want to stay in my family bubble and not meet up with friends thanks Danielle oh my god I feel like I could have written that honestly I feel like do do not feel pressure to get out of the family bubble or to do things when you're not ready because I've spoken to so

many people some of whom are my friends who had babies before me and they made it look so easy like they would just come out with me and I think I was really annoying because I thought oh I love that you don't talk about your children in hindsight probably quite selfish that I never asked about their children but now that I've spoken to them when I was like oh my god you must have thought I was such a dick and they were like yeah but the thing is that we were so desperate to feel like ourselves they they actually like force themselves to go out and force themselves to hang out with non non children friends to try and like cling on to that sense of normality and I haven't done that but bear in mind like I'm a pandemic mum as I know a lot of you are as well and like I feel like it is

really hard and it does take over your life and I felt like I can't like see friends a lot and to be fair a lot of them have understood I've got a couple of friends who don't have kids and they don't ask and I do find that hard but I remind myself that neither did I and you know what I've learned a really big lesson I've learned is that the people in your life don't have to be everything at all times to you like you know you can have friends that you love to meet up to have drinks with you can have friends that you love to meet up with to talk about mum stuff you can have friends that are really good listeners you can have friends that you love to meet up with to talk about mum stuff you can have friends that are really good listeners you can have friends that you go to for like financial advice like whatever it is I feel like you don't need each person to be all of

those things and so even though like my couple of friends who never asked for ALF I'm like do you know what I get it because I didn't before I was a mum and there will be a time in my life that we go back into the same path whether that's when I kind of get my I mean I hate to say freedom but my freedom back and I start going out and or whether that's if they ever have decide to have children so I feel like you know it's not linear whereas I also have a friend who did not get it like I've been really shit like admittedly shit with my friends this year but it's because I simply haven't had a haven't had time to do it all something had to give and be like I feel like a lot of it I've just been trying to survive like you know especially with like going through like a six month period of being woken up every

half an hour like that is a form of torture we just have to be kind to ourselves and the friends that don't get it like you know what maybe they're not that like that good of friends like my friend who didn't get it he had gone through like a really bad breakup and for the last two years I've really been a lifeline for him like I would sit on the phone for hours as I would for any of my friends and talk about talk it through with him and for the few months that I just like have been a bit shit and I admitted that I'd been a bit shit he didn't get it and do you know what that's okay that's okay like something has to give like we can't be everything to everyone and I know like I you

know I was working I was trying to catch up on sleep I was trying to get to grips with my life with Alf and I didn't have time and now I'm starting to feel like this year right I do really want to start to see friends more but it's got to be the friends that make you feel good do you know what I mean like I mean all friends should make you feel good but we we just do our time is so precious like everyone's time is precious but once you've got kids that that kiddie free time even you know what like I used to love a long phone chat like I would spend a good hour on the phone to my friends every single day like my friends are my life they they are like the loves of my life in the same way that Tommy is a love for my life like

my friends are so important to me but now to spend an hour on the phone a day that that is potentially the only hour I get to myself do you know I mean it's just different isn't it like time is a lot more valuable so really long-winded Danielle but basically I hope that you just know that you do what's right and friends will understand I feel like sometimes we worry they don't understand so we almost don't communicate but as long as you communicate like I miss you guys so much or I would love to see you and as for not understanding the co-sleeping thing like the thing that irks me the most about like parenthood or motherhood is like people judging each other's choices because there is a lot of judgment isn't it it's weird

because actually I've never ever ever experienced like sisterhood like I have since I became a mum like I wouldn't have got through a lot of the experiences I've been in without you guys without all the like friendly advice and stuff on social media but there's also a lot of judgment and I think it is because we do what we think is right it's easy to get defensive isn't it I don't know like why is it maybe we're just sleep deprived we are like we do our own research and we know what work with our babies that we forget that other people have different circumstances different babies different everything like I co-sleep but I 100% don't think it's for everyone and equally like I'm really proud that I breastfed but as I've mentioned before like my sister I think did it for three or four

months maybe six months I'm not sure but um like she did bloody amazing because she really struggled and was pumping loads and I'll tell you what now that I am pumping hats off to anyone who is pumping because it is it is an it is a it's another job isn't it like wow yeah so that is a really long-winded way to say do not feel guilty about who and what you give your time to and don't feel like you have to prove yourself to anyone because it I definitely feel like I lost my identity and do you know what maybe if I'd have made more of an effort with people I wouldn't have felt like that but I also feel like I did what felt right for me and for Alf and that that's all you can do like the people that care will understand and the other ones well pardon my French but fucking so I'm just gonna leave it

there because I genuinely just feel like I've talked to myself for god knows how long so please let me know how you found this podcast episode if you're like Ashley please god bring another guest in do not do this on your own again or if you liked it let me know because maybe I can do it more it's definitely a way for me to be able to talk more about um like what I'm up to and what's been going on with alf um but yeah just let me know thank you for listening to my lovely little podcast mum's the word the parenting podcast and like i mentioned earlier uh hit the subscribe or follow button so you never miss an episode and if you are on apple podcast please please leave a review leave a five-star rating

it helps others to find us and it also helps me see the comments and see the feedback. And talking of spreading the news, tell someone else about the podcast today, especially if you know that they're thinking of giving up breastfeeding or going through biting or whatever it might be that I've talked about today that you think that they might benefit from. And I will be back with another episode, same time, same place next week. And I'll have a brilliant guest back to the normal format so yeah thanks for listening bye