Mum's The Word! The Parenting Podcast - The Realities of Parenting IVF Twins - with Jane Dowden

Episode Date: May 26, 2024

On This Week's Mum's The Word:Kelsey Parker is joined by Jane Dowden, better known as Mum with a Mic, on this week's podcast chatting everything from her social media journey, swimming lessons, The BAFTAs & her IVF journey!They'll Discuss:Why Swimming Lessons are the bane of her life?How she became a social media comedy sketch star?The story behind the birth of her IVF twinsGet In Contact With Us:Do you have a question for us? Get in touch on our Whatsapp, that's 07599927537 or email us at [e-mail] for Listening---A Create Podcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Hello and welcome back to Mum's The Word, the parenting podcast. I'm Kelsey Parker and I'm your host this week. Right guys, what's happened to me this week? Oh, I've had a poorly Bodie and he's just been a typical boy and he just wants his mum. Last night he was up and he was like, my throat's spicy, mum, my throat's spicy. So it's been a lot of mummy cuddles and a lot of attention and a lot of him just being a poorly little boy. So today's guest on Mum's The Word is Jane Dowden, better known as Mum and a mike on social media her unique and relatable viral content has made her become the go-to creator for your daily dose of fly on the wall parenting content no stranger to larger screens jane has featured in itv's the delivery man welcome to the podcast jane how are you i'm

all right yeah i'm okay how's life how? How are the kids? Tell me everything. They're good they're good it's busy it's um I feel like lots of different things are sort of happening at the moment and it's just finding that balance I don't know if you probably find this as well just of being present and being a good mum but also like doing things for yourself and trying to further yourself in things that make your heart sing just like finding that balance which is tricky but yeah for me i'm not good at the second part i'm not good at doing stuff for me i'm trying so hard this year to focus on me and do stuff for me because i feel like i've not done that really yeah like what sort of stuff could you do for yourself like that you don't do

that you would like to do you know what is for me it's like finding time to do everything because i think when i'm on my own it's like going to the gym now i've got a running machine indoors so i'm like well at least i'm gonna get it in somewhere but obviously it's having that little luxury of going to the gym in the morning yeah the gym's like changed my life a little bit actually i've just got into it about three months ago just to kind of get I went for my head to be honest but it's now completely part of my lifestyle so I just prioritize it I just make sure where the kids are at school or whenever that there's just a little slot where I can run and do an hour session and come out which is weird like I'm not that person I normally take a mick of people out people that do that she's normally doing it on her Instagram literally

I think making fun of them now she's like it is me yeah i know i think i did i think i did a post in early january about people that go to the gym over the christmas period like whatever losers and then come and then come like mid-january i was a january joiner at the gym oh the worst time such an eye roll i hate the january joiners the worst i'm still there though and we're in May. So yeah, it's just something I can do for myself that's just for me. It's literally amazing. I totally recommend finding something that is just for you and that helps your head.

Yeah, and it's all about like clearing your head and having that space to think. Yeah, for sure. Because as parents. Yeah, and it's making my bum more toned so win-win so you're gonna look incredible come the summer are you well maybe no I don't know I didn't go for that but it is a nice little um benefit I guess if you're working out you get toned have you made any videos of yourself at the gym like have we had any uh sketches of you at

the gym no I can't't. I don't know. I feel like it's a bit too niche for my audience. Not to say I won't. I have done a couple of little videos of my stories in there and I just feel like a little bit of a beep. What do you feel like your audience like to see? I think a great swathe of my audience

like to see sort of mother comedy or parenting comedy definitely I don't actually know what the percentage is but I reckon 75% of my audience have children I would have made a guess at but I think not just motherhood or parenting comedy but just stuff that's relatable stuff that people think maybe only happens to them or something they feel is only yeah they feel a bit alone with maybe and I put it out there and go no we all feel like that or isn't this annoying when this happens those ones are the ones that people really like give me an example for people that don't haven't

seen your Instagram so swimming so I did a whole section um of taking your kids to swimming lessons because it's something that across the board I think we all hate it's just sweaty what do you hate the most the swimming hats like putting the swimming hats on are the bane of my life I've not been doing it and the teacher was like oh they are meant to wear the swimming hat have you met my daughter there's no way she cries about having a hairbrush let alone me putting the swimming hat it's the worst have to. Have you met my daughter? There's no way. She cries about having a hairbrush, let alone me putting the swimming hat on. It's the worst. And I've got two to do and we're always running late

because that's my life. So I'm like trying to get these hats on and like in their face. And it's just a nightmare. Then you're sweaty and you're going in and then they don't even like it and they're not getting any better.

One of my little boys has been in the same group for a year and a half. Shall I do a little confession yeah i was that parent and i don't want to be that parent what do you mean so aurelia is in this level and i kept asking the swimming teacher like why is she not moving up why is she not moving up like i don't understand why she's not moving up i really hope the swimming teacher is not listening to this so um i was like she's good enough to be in the next level and also with

aurelia you know when you know your children like if the swimming instructor just said to her come on you can do it get on with it right she'd do it but because she's giving her the little inch aurelia will take the mark i can't do it i can't do it she puts her legs down she's in like the shallower water yeah so is mine so and I emailed and said, due to work commitments, I can't make the 4.30 class. So can Aurelia do the five o'clock level two? So I've moved her up myself. You've moved her up yourself.

Yeah, I've done it. Took action. No, and I don't want to be that parent. But honestly, he's the same. And no one do that at K2K. And he's really tall as well. And he's in this tiny little shallow baby pool. And I'm like, of course,

his feet keep touching the floor. It's too shallow him and he can swim so when we go on holiday i throw him in he doesn't have armbands he can literally he literally can swim so but swimming lessons is with a bunch of three-year-olds i don't know but um yeah no so there's that why don't you just do what i've just done well i think i am yeah do it do it everyone out there if you want your child to be moved up, just email and say you can't make the class. And then, yeah, what else do we hate about swimming lessons? The showering afterwards.

Everything's wet and sticky. It's just rank. It's just rank. And the thing is, so I did a whole series of sketches about it and they just went mad because all the parents are like, me too. I mean, yeah, they need to find a better way of getting I mean I literally wear next to nothing to go to the swimming lessons I bet the other

I bet the other mums look at me and be like does she actually want to put some clothes on like I don't wear a bra I wear like a little vest up I'm I am literally dripping I don't blame you by the end of it so what made you start doing your sketches? So it all started in lockdown. And it was the weirdest thing. It was like a few times in my life, I've had like a gut feeling about something. And that has always been quite significant to me. And for some reason, it was in I think, April, May 2020. And I just had this overwhelming feeling, so random, to record a song, like just a cover of something and post it on social media. What made you think that? I don't...

What gave you the overwhelming feeling to think... Well, I love singing and I've always loved singing. And I felt like there were no rules during that period. And everyone was being quite creative. And I don't know, I just wanted to sing a song. I can't explain it. Everyone was being quite creative and I don't know I just wanted to sing a song I can't explain it everyone was being creative in lockdown yeah everyone was filming TikTok yeah for sure but I wasn't even I don't even think I had TikTok then like I wasn't I didn't do it to for any other reason than I just wanted to sing a song and how many followers did

you have then oh like my mum like no I had like 300 followers I didn't use Instagram like that at all like I posted a picture of my roast dinner occasionally like I didn't I didn't use it for that so yeah I went up dusted off this old mic that I hadn't used for 10 years set it up recorded a mediocre version of Can't Help Falling In Love and posted it and everyone was really sweet all 300 followers like my mum my mom so proud of you baby girl my mom and brenda and then i just liked the feeling and i i just thought gosh how nice to be in control of something creative that isn't being an actor and you know because you're not in control well i feel like you're not in control of that and so the next night i recorded another song and

then i did another one a few days later and then i thought oh i'm gonna do one of those parodies you know where you mix the lyrics up and make it funny so I posted that so your first one wasn't even a sketch it was literally you taking it seriously that's why I'm called mum and a mic because that that's where it all started there we go and yeah so I did a parody and then that went well and I did another one I mean when I look back at them now it's like cringe but but I think you've got to start somewhere you've got to start somewhere. You've got to start somewhere. And I wasn't doing it to become a content creator.

And also, even I feel like with socials, it's jumped so much. Like, I think that's four years ago. Yeah. Like, I think it has jumped hugely of what we actually have to produce now. Oh, my God. Yeah. And the quality of what I was doing wasn't great but and they were quite long these parodies as well because they were

the length of a song so they took forever to make and then I sort of thought gosh I wish there was a way I could do sketches or something like shorter form and in came reels it was it was just all aligned and so then I started doing sketches and then that was I'd always wanted to write and I know it's short form but I still hadn't even done sketches and then that was I'd always wanted to write and I know it's short form but I still hadn't even done that and then it just took I mean I think in the August I maybe had 2,000 followers when reels came out and then once they did and I could put out those sketches quite regularly the account just went changed my life but it did all start by singing a mediocre version of it is just life life changing and it is crazy how your life can change in four years.

What do the school mums think? I don't know. I'd have to ask them. I think mostly quite supportive of it. Yeah, I sometimes get sort of pulled aside in the morning on the school run by a mum I don't know. Just to say, you know, I follow you. I think you're great, which is lovely.

I don't know, really, because I guess the school mums only know me from when I was doing this. So, yeah, I don't know, really. And you was always working as? An actor, yeah, a jobbing actor. So I did a couple of stints in the West End, I did tours, did a few bits on telly, not huge amounts.

But I always had to have like another job. There was always something else which was paying the bills. Not when I did theatre, because obviously you're in a production for three or four months or whatnot. But yeah, with other stuff, it was always. I do feel like now, like people need to have the other jobs. Well, yeah.

But yeah. Trust of living. Yeah, for sure. But but i do i miss acting i still am an actor i still have an agent and i still want to do it it's just i think how how is that going do you it's okay i mean it's okay you know there's a few things that i've done in the last like year or so but i mean i always want to do more but i think i also think there's a little bit of snobbery i don't know if I should say this within the acting industry of what I do yeah and I don't know why because I feel like I feel like

casting directors and directors should go yeah go you trying to you know do it yourself because I'm so sick of knocking on that door for years and years and just nobody opening it or very occasionally like pulling it ajar for five minutes for me to sneak in and do something but I've just gone around the back and I'm knocking on the back door and making my own way and I just don't think there's anything wrong with that do you know what I I had it as well that I went and met like agents and stuff and it was like it was so hard to get for them to get their head around it was like oh so you're doing Instagram I'm like yeah I'm doing Instagram but I actually want to act and acting is my passion and my love and my

dream but yeah that's not actually paying my bills yeah for sure so i'm doing this and it was almost like then it was like oh no sorry we don't want to represent you yeah and i i don't know i think i don't know it does need to change because the power of social media is huge. Yeah, I think so. And I think definitely, I feel like with what I do online, even though I love drama, drama, no, but like acting drama, I do understand how maybe I've pigeonholed myself slightly more into a comedy place, but I'm okay with that. But yeah, look at Sheridan Smith. Yeah. She started out in comedy.

Yeah. place but I'm okay with that but yeah look at Sheridan Smith yeah she started out in comedy yeah and has now played Scylla and done huge western jobs like she's amazing I just feel like as I grow and as I learn what I'm doing more and maybe as my platform grows that hopefully just might get me to a place where I can transition to the screen again because it'd be great to have someone else film me rather than me have to film edit right and it is hard work and you are doing everything yeah yeah I don't have anyone do apart from my lovely manager who does you know my day-to-day and my negotiating and things I do everything else like the creative side of it is all me and it's a lot it's a lot to do yeah and it is a full-time job. 100%. And you're being a mum as well. Yeah, just about. So, yeah, we've covered, like, being an actress and working in this.

Like, it is so tough. And I was going to say, so you was at the BAFTAs. I was. Oh, my God. Any gossip? Any gossip from the BAFTAs? Well, the deck from Anne and Dec looked at me and smiled. Gossip.

No, it was great. I just really loved it. Well, the deck from Ann and Deck looked at me and smiled. Gossip. No, it was great. I just really loved it. I sometimes, I said this, I posted last night about it. And sometimes you probably find this with these events, kind of through the lens of social media, they look really glam and really special. And actually in reality, you don't feel special and they're not great.

And I don't know, you walk away going, oh, it's just not what I thought it would be this wasn't that oh really no I loved it I felt like everyone was in good spirits every single person I spoke to was lovely it didn't feel like them and us because sometimes when you're a social you're there because of social media but it's like a you know it's it's an industry within itself and there's so much talent in the pool of people that are doing these sketches or working on TikTok and Instagram and it's okay for I think us to have a space amongst creatives because I am a creative but no it was it was such a lovely lovely day I

just felt so special and yeah everyone was in good form and it was P&O, the hosts, the sponsors were just, it was just flawless. It was just such a good day. I loved it. Yeah. I'm quite jealous. I didn't get invited. Have you been before? No, I've never been to BAFTAs.

Right. Listen up. Get Kelsey in there. No, it was great. It was so lovely. I mean, I thought I'd win a BAFTA for some of the stuff that I've worked on. No one's seen any of my documentaries that I I did right I would need to rectify that I love like getting dolled up getting my hair done get my makeup done and just feeling like although I bought Kelsey for the

night yeah I bought 10 dresses to obviously to keep one and return nine standard and I was just stressing about it and then in the end I wore a dress I already had obviously that yeah where did where did you get your dresses from uh everywhere revolve mainly do you know revolve yeah yeah I think it is so hard it's so hard I just like to try stuff on I'm not sort of a I don't know a standard shape so it's just unless I'm in a shop but where do you get ball gowns from in a shop no it's true they need to actually someone needs to do that there's a market for it a ball gown shop but like not no but not like not like prom dresses not like prom dresses we need just nice classy ball gowns this gotta be somewhere out there someone's gotta do it right if anyone's

listening we need a classy ball gown shop that we can go in and try them yeah because i like to try on yeah i find online shopping really hard i mean we really love it i find online shopping so hard yeah i like to look and see and be like is that actually gonna look good on me yeah because sometimes you just look at their models and it's just like you being delusional thinking yeah i'm my body looks like that that's what i'm gonna look like when this comes and then it comes you go wow i look absolutely terrible the worst there's nothing worse well there is swimming lessons but back to swimming do you find it hard juggling work and the kids yeah definitely i feel guilty a lot of the time i feel i feel like most mothers do and fathers sorry this is just about mums no yeah we don't talk about them um i yeah i do i

probably need to get better at striking a balance i think sometimes i i kind of i'm all in and i can't split myself i i don't know but then i guess my kids are watching their mum carve something out and obviously they benefit from what i do because they get to do cool things and have a nice life most of the time um that's always my threat yeah do you want to do nice things do you like the nice things that you get to do because you won't be doing them if you don't do as I say so true um so yeah I do I do struggle with it a bit though sometimes but luckily I've got a supportive family and stuff so yeah we we figure it out because i always talk about the village yeah and i feel like the village was a thing of the past like i feel i feel like now we're

we all try and be so um independent and do things on our own but you need the village you need the people to help you and support you i mean i've i'm in a place where i have to ask for help all the time and i know some people who does help you you? My mum, my auntie, my best friends, like everyone and anyone. And I even have, because I've run a performing arts school, I've even got some of the dance mums that go to me. Is there anything you don't do, Kelsey? No, there actually isn't. I am, I'm coming to terms with that I'm a workaholic.

Okay. I love work and I feel like work for me is a distraction. Okay. And it's my coping mechanism. And I think that's why I just do so many jobs and love work. Do you have an insatiable fascination with the paranormal? Brace yourself for the supernatural world is about to reveal all of its secrets on the Paranormal Activity podcast. And who better to guide you through this hair-raising journey than myself, Yvette Fielding, renowned paranormal investigator. Every episode of Paranormal Activity takes you on an unforgettable adventure

into the unknown. But that's not all. The true heart of this podcast lies in the stories, evidence and questions shared by our devoted listeners. Will you dare to join me? Listen to Paranormal Activity with me, Yvette Fielding, wherever you get your podcasts from. What would you say is your biggest mum fail? Oh, I love a good mum fail. I love a good mum fail I think probably I'm always in a rush so I'm always just trying to get out the door and quite often have this like frantic energy with my children

and on reflection I always think that it just actually creates chaos and so I'm always trying to be aware of actually I've talked about this before but just taking a breath even if it takes slightly longer to get out in the long run by you staying calmer you actually get everything done a bit quicker because I'm quite good at them being chaotic and then me adding to the chaos and then yeah like that's something i always try and work on just trying to be better but i think it is so hard i think getting out the door in the morning is so hard and i remember as a kid my mum and her voice yeah my mum does listen to this but so annoying that was literally me this morning so annoying and i always think i don't want to be that person i

don't want to be like my mom i'm not going to do the shout and i'm not going to tell him to get out the door but i am that person yeah there is no way that you are not shouting at your kids in the morning do you know when people do the whole gentle parenting i'm like but how do how do you get how do you get out the door they must just be late to everything yeah and i i can't bear being late i really oh god I hate being late I'm a little bit late are you I'm a bit bad do you know what it is it's because I'm optimistic you think I'm gonna get there I always think I'll get there by then yeah and so I'm I'm not always but I am always well no most of the time I am quite a little bit late are you I know

it's not good is it I don't care about where i'm going to i don't oh i thought i'm rude to the person that i'm meeting and i don't feel like i should be there early or anything like that i just for some reason can never get somewhere on time so you would be my friend that i would tell you a different time yeah i'm a hundred percent that friend i have i have friends like you that I'm like oh yeah and we're all meeting at half one but I'm like

yeah you've got to be there at one yeah if we ever go out do that with me and some of my friends they'll ring and go have I actually got to be there at that time

or are you doing this whole thing I'm like you've got to be there at one but I know they're always they will still be late yeah I just

I don't know I guess it's from my mum as well she has always like you're on time always on time I don't know what it is and I think my mum as well. She has always like... You're on time. Always on time. I don't know what it is. And I think the anxiousness from her wanting to be on time has made me anxious to be on time for things.

Yeah, I don't know. It is that I just always think I've got enough time. I've got enough time. And then I start the journey and I think, oh, I've not left enough time. But I'm never like crazy, rudely late. But I'm always like five, ten minutes late. Hey! Five, ten minutes late five ten

minutes late today standard yeah and then we got talking about other stuff right so what we like to talk about on mum's the word are like birth stories okay how were yours well um obviously I had twins yes so I had a c-section so mine was all very lovely and calm there were Christmas songs playing yeah it was it was mad I just felt I remember being willed down to have them so prior to this we'd had a really traumatic pregnancy so I'd gone into labor at 21 weeks really yeah it was horrible so I went into labor at 21 weeks and but what do they do then they stop they stop well sadly nine times out of ten you absolutely can't stop it it's and i was three centimeters dilated so i was one centimeter away from active labor i had no symptoms i had that gut feeling again that i talk about i just

had this feeling that something was wrong can't explain it still can't explain it so i went to made my um partner take me to that hospital and everything was fine they checked the boys over they were like everything's fine there's nothing wrong and I just something just doesn't feel right and then they checked through a speculum and her face went white and she was like I'm so sorry you're in labour 21 weeks so that is unfortunately not a viable that's not a viable sort of week to have a child um oh i give myself goosebumps when i talk about this um so uh they i had an emergency operation which doesn't usually work as in they don't usually carry it out on twin parents twin

it's not your vagina kelsey it's your cervix it's much further up nothing wrong with my vagina it was my cervix um i literally actually do that yeah the procedure is insane what they do as well to to but my little boy's bag was bulging through my cervix because the boys were they are they non-identical they're identical they're identical yeah so one placenta so again like like they are a freak of nature anyway aren't they yes that's what identical so it's one embryo that then splits yeah and they were IVF as well so oh okay yeah so we'd um had one embryo put in and then they said you definitely won't have twins and then we went for a six week scan you definitely got twins so there's two heartbeats I swore a lot just because I had actually always wanted twins but I didn't necessarily want to then go from IVF

to one of the highest brackets of you know things going wrong and then it obviously it did go wrong so yeah I was in hospital for five weeks this was after the operation because they still because the bag had been exposed and I was still contracting they still thought that it was game over like the chance of us actually getting to take the boys home was so slim at that point so yeah we're in hospital I was in hospital for five weeks how was that the worst time of my life to be honest like had to dig deep to even function and were you on a ward with other expect like what ward were you on expecting mums so people were coming in and going to have

their babies and you were on that ward yeah it was really hard it was i was in a and i'm actually i want to i'm going to write about it because it was such a profound time of my life and also some funny stuff happened and also i met some incredible incredible women on on that journey so i was in a room there were two beds there was a blue curtain dividing us and over those five weeks all these different women came in one who of whom's a really good friend of mine now really yeah i just couldn't do it i couldn't be in there for five weeks i'm like can i just go can you just well you say that but when you think that i know for the baby yeah like i would done anything. So it's people sleeping and chewing and eating.

Yeah, I'm being noisy next to me. The worst one was when... Did you get earplugs? Yeah, yeah, I did. The worst one was when they wheeled somebody in and it was quite near the beginning. So the prognosis of me getting live babies at the end was so slim. So it was just, I honestly,

it was just the darkest, darkest time of my life. And then they wheeled someone in and she was in active labour and she had an excited partner with her and her mum and dad were all excited and I had to basically listen until she was ready to push this bed next to me and it was so traumatizing I understand that there weren't enough beds and obviously you know a safe baby in your head is that going to be me am I going to get to that well I at that point I absolutely didn't think that was even an option. I just thought, yeah, and so did the doctors. It was such a slim chance. But yeah, it worked.

And I did bed rest for 15 weeks in total. I did five at home, five in hospital, 10 at home. And so by the time I got to have them. Yeah, because that was, yeah, 15 weeks. At 36 weeks. So after five weeks, why did they let you go home? Because I was 26 weeks. They had a shot if they were born.

And I was starting to get sort of mentally quite poorly, I think, and institutionalised, I guess, being in a hospital for that long. So the hospital were great, actually. They let me do day visits because I was so nervous to leave. Day visits home, and then I'd come back to sleep in the hospital were great actually they let me do day visits because I was so nervous to leave day visits home and then I'd come back to sleep in the hospital and then by 26 weeks they were like it's okay you can go home so I did and then did it at home so yeah just laid in a bed for 10 weeks it was mad but I think when you've been faced with an option that your children are going to die you do anything anything at all and actually it helped when they

were born because i just was so grateful they were there i just was so grateful i didn't really care that i wasn't sleeping i just i couldn't believe that and that they were here really you were well rested yeah so many mums don't rest up well i don't know i enjoy that time i got insomnia though so i wasn't that rested yeah well yeah it's the stress of it yeah i think so and it also because there was such a long period where i really thought they weren't going to make it everyone thought they weren't going to make it i was being told every day they weren't going to make it i didn't really realize i was having these boys until I was sort of 30 weeks. So I only really had six weeks to get my head around the fact

that I was going from zero to two. And it all just felt a bit mental. But yeah, here we are. This is where I believe in the soul. Like they're meant to be here. I hope so. It's got to be. Yeah, I don't know.

I don't know. They've gone through so much. I know. And they're here. They're usually hanging on. Mum, come on. Yeah, I'm not going anywhere.'ve picked you like i obviously i believe whatever no that's nice you believe your i believe that you pick your mom and you're here they're here

and they they went through all of that i'm just so grateful that whatever that night the 5th of september it was made me go something's wrong I don't know what it was I'll never know but if I hadn't have gone to hospital that night I would not they would not be here because if I'd have gone to the next morning. So you had that feeling of? Just had that feeling it was the same feeling I had when I recorded the song same feeling I've got to do this I don't know what it is can't explain it got to do it I always follow my gut for that reason always wow i love it i'm here for it i absolutely love anything like that yeah so what how many weeks were they born at the boys 36 36 it was a plan c section as well with identicals they don't really like you to go past 37 because of the sharing of placenta i think there can be issues or whatnot because one can be greedy yeah i think so and you're there's a thing called tts i think there can be issues or whatnot because one can be greedy yeah i think so and

you're there's a thing called tts i think i've said that right apologies if i haven't twin to twin transfusion syndrome and it's quite common in identical twins that had and they had to get the placenta lasered and so we didn't get that luckily but when you get to 37 weeks it can come on and it can come on severely and it's it can be catastrophic so yeah they like to deliver them before 37 to avoid those things happening so yeah and they were fine they came out screaming straight on the boob what did they weigh 5 10 and 5 11 so they were like great like sizes as well yeah i mean they want to be for the amount i ate i couldn't stop eating i just couldn't stop eating really i couldn't stop eating you know

i didn't put weight on or not really i just had a massive bum because i could just imagine being in bed no i don't think i did i mean you put weight on when you have when you're pregnant right but i yeah i don't know no hybrid cancer i did have an excuse as well but oh my god i was like so swollen it was crazy they said i can't remember what it was i can't remember how many extra I don't know. I have three of them. I did have an excuse as well. But oh my God, I was like so swollen. It was crazy. They said, I can't remember what it was. I can't remember how many extra calories they say you ought to have when you're pregnant. But when it's twins, it's not double that.

It's I think an extra couple of hundred. I was eating triple what they were telling me. You were eating for three. But I wanted it. And I'm, you know, I was like, I obviously need it. And what was your cravings? Everything. McDonald's was the main one.

I cried once because McDonald's was shut. And I just i just wanted salt and that is just really wanted salt i don't know if you believe in cravings or not but i had the sweet for aurelia i wanted ice cream chocolate for bodie i wanted salt and vinegar salt chips with And kids' food as well, as in... You wanted Happy Meal? I wanted Happy Meal. No, as in I wanted burgers and stuff, but I also wanted Fish Fingers chips and peas, like random stuff. I don't eat stuff like that.

But when I was pregnant, I was like, I just wanted that, just kids' food and McDonald's. I saw someone the other day that wanted, like, the whole sponge, like, that they... They wanted to eat sponge? I've heard about this. Yeah, and, like, flannel. I'm like, but no that makes me i don't understand though i don't understand if someone could write in and tell me what what is that craving like actually do they eat the sponge

or just this is what i don't understand do they chew on the sponge and eat it or do they just suck the water on us on a sponge or a flannel like i was quite confused by it. She can't eat flannel. Can you? Can you eat flannel? Join us on next week's podcast where we talk about eating flannels. I actually loved the birth story. Yeah.

So actually when it came out... It was very traumatic for you. Yeah. Well, it wasn't the birth. The actual birth was the calmest part of the whole process for me. It was the build up to that that was so hard. But yeah, the birth was just mad.

I just couldn't. I just kept laughing. And they were like, why are you laughing? Because I literally cannot get my head around that you're about to pull two children out of my stomach. Because at 21 weeks, we didn't think this was going to be. No, not at all. out of my stomach because at 21 weeks we didn't think this was gonna be no not at all and that's why i love doing this podcast because you get to hear stories like that and that gives people hope that are at that stage and that's happened to them yeah what the when i when it happened to

me and i was in hospital i tried to find a something online just a positive story i i swear to god i didn't find one not one positive story of someone who'd gone into labor at 21 weeks with twins who got to take them home i couldn't find one you wrote it down somewhere now for other people so i have i put it on my post the other day and i'll tell you what i had a follower message me about three months ago and she said my sister-in-law is pregnant with identical twins and she's 21 weeks pregnant she's just gone into labor can you speak to her and I was like yeah I can actually so um she gave me her number and I spoke to her on the phone and I said I can't advise you what to do obviously I'm not a doctor

but I had a stitch and it worked and she said but they're telling me they don't think it will work and I said that's also what they said to me just have it but the alternative is you're going to give birth in the next week or so and it's going to be game over but I said obviously like you need to be advised by your consultants like I can't advise for you but I can tell you what I did and why I did it I just and also I just never spoken to somebody before who'd been in that exact exact situation and I just I I just knew the pain she was in it was really emotional actually because I just know that absolute that absolute bewilderment of I have no control over this I'm about to lose two babies and also she'd been through a really hard time of IVF and she was quite a lot older than me so it she felt like it was her last chance

at this and she messaged me uh a few weeks ago and she got to 37 weeks she had the stitch and they were born healthy and happy so let's hope she puts that out there too because yeah i even know like obviously completely different when tom was diagnosed yeah i did not look for anything sad online okay like i didn't look at prognosis anything like that I was like survivor stories positive stories I think positivity and like positive energy just yeah it gives you hope yeah I said that to her I was like above all else just believe there's hope because there is hope because I it happened to me and I got to take my voice home so I know oh god I was honestly I was absolutely buzzing that I'd shared something I think it's an old post but I've pinned it from a couple of years ago someone had read that passed that story on to somebody else we'd got to connect that made

her make a decision that meant that she now has her two boys like how amazing that is that just to have a platform to be able to do that it's having the platform and then going back to the acting agent it's like this is why I've got the platform because i'm helping people come on guys cast me in downton do we even do downton anymore don't even know if i want to be in downton i'll be in downton put me in downton whatever put me in something but yeah but that is the power of social media and that's what i love and that's why i keep doing what i'm doing because i have so many people message me day in day out that want a little bit of positivity yeah thank you so much for coming on oh it's over I loved it I loved it so

much there's anything else you want to say no that's it do you feel like I've I've covered anything do you want any more questions no I think that's it it's perfect I just enjoyed it yeah it's been great you were amazing thank you you. Do you have a question you want me and my guests to answer? Get in touch by emailing askmumsthewordpod at gmail.com or leave us a voicemail on WhatsApp. Our number is 07599927537 or leave it as a review on Apple Podcasts. Make sure you hit the subscribe or follow button.

So you never miss an episode. If you're listening on Apple podcasts, then please leave us a review and a five star rating. It helps others find us. And talking of spreading the news, please tell another person about the podcast and help us reach more people. So I've been Kelsey Parker. about the podcast and help us reach more people.

So I've been Kelsey Parker. You can find me on being underscore Kelsey on Instagram, where I'm just being me. We'll be back with another episode, same time, same place next week. Thanks for listening.