Muscle for Life with Mike Matthews - How Laurie Doubled Her Strength in 3 Months With My VIP Coaching
Episode Date: March 16, 2022In this podcast, I interview Laurie, who did three months of Legion’s VIP one-on-one coaching program to get strong while improving her body composition. In fact, Laurie went from lifting just the b...ar on her squat and deadlift (and less than the bar on the bench press) to lifting more than double that on each lift with ease. And she did that all while losing 6 pounds and dropping nearly two pant sizes. Laurie had started to read Thinner Leaner Stronger, but was overwhelmed by nutrition and meal planning and didn’t really know what to do in the gym. She was following random workouts from influencers and didn’t have a set program to follow, which led to a lot of gym intimidation. Ultimately, she decided to get a coach to handle her training programming and macros and help overcome her fear. In this interview, Laurie and I chat about her story, and the obstacles she navigated along the way, including how she started meal planning and prepping and learned to eat without weighing everything, how she increased her protein intake, how she overcame gym intimidation, how much her body changed despite only losing 6 pounds, why it’s ok to work on your body and aim for self-improvement, what her long term plans are, and more. So if you’re looking for a jolt of inspiration and like motivational stories, definitely listen to this episode. Timestamps: 0:00 - Legion VIP One-on-One Coaching: https://buylegion.com/vip 5:37 - Where were you at before you found my training program? 10:48 - What did your numbers look like before and after my program? 16:32 - When you started training, were you concerned about getting bulky? 17:20 - How did you get used to the amount of protein? 21:05 - How do you make your shakes tasty? 22:29 - Were you practicing portion control while training or were you weighing and measuring your food? 25:38 - Are you still cutting? 29:59 - How did you feel about gym intimidation when you first started and how do you feel about it now? 34:41 - Once you got into the routine, was it different from what you expected? 37:42 - What are your long term goals and short term goals? 39:02 - What are your thoughts on people who think you have an unhealthy relationship with working out? 46:32 - After our coaching program, did you feel confident in moving forward on your own? Mentioned on the show: Legion VIP One-on-One Coaching: https://buylegion.com/vip Thinner Leaner Stronger: https://legionathletics.com/products/books/thinner-leaner-stronger/
Transcript
Discussion (0)
Hello, and welcome to another episode of Muscle for Life. I'm Mike Matthews. Thank you for joining
me today to hear an interview I did with Lori, who did three months of my VIP one-on-one coaching
program, which you can learn more about at buylegion.com slash VIP, B-U-I-L-E-G-I-O-N.com
slash VIP. And in those three months, she gained a lot of strength. She improved her body composition dramatically.
She also learned how to do this fitness thing,
which is a big selling point of my coaching service
is we really teach you what to do.
We want you to be independent.
We don't want you to have to be a client forever.
Now, some people do stick with us for a long time because they like the accountability. They like being able to go
to their coach and get meal plan updates and training plan updates and so forth. But there
are many clients who after just three months feel confident to carry on by themselves for
sometimes it's six months and then they come back and maybe they wanna go
from maintaining to lean bulking,
or sometimes they just carry on on their own indefinitely.
And in the case of Lori,
she went from lifting just the bar
on her squat and deadlift, that's where she started,
and less than the bar on her bench press,
to lifting more than double that on each of those
with ease. And she did that while losing six pounds and gaining muscle because she only,
only quote unquote lost six pounds, but she has gone down nearly two pant sizes. And that of
course is the body recomposition effect where you are losing
fat but you are replacing some of that weight with muscle and so what you see on the scale
doesn't quite make sense at least for for many people who experience that for the first time
they are surprised to see quote-unquote only six pounds of weight loss but such a dramatic change
in the mirror and so in this interview,
Lori and I talk about her story and where she was at before finding me and my work,
how she found me and my work. She talks about some of the obstacles she had to navigate along
the way over the course of the three months of coaching, including meal planning, meal prepping,
learning to eat right without having
to weigh everything, how to increase her protein intake, which is something that many women
struggle with because many women who have come to me over the years, they might be eating
30 or 50 grams of protein per day, and now they're supposed to eat 100, 120, 140 grams
of protein per day.
That can be tough. Lori talks about overcoming gym
intimidation and more. Before we get started, I've worked with tens of thousands of people
over the years. And the biggest thing I see with the people I have helped the most is they're often missing just one crucial piece of the puzzle. And if you are having trouble
reaching your fitness goals as quickly as you'd like, I'm going to guess it is the same thing
with you. You are probably doing a lot of things right, but dollars to donuts, there's something
you're not doing right. And that is what is giving you most of the grief. Maybe it's your calories.
Maybe it's your macros. Maybe it's your the grief. Maybe it's your calories. Maybe it's your macros.
Maybe it's your exercise selection.
Maybe it's food choices.
Maybe you are not progressively overloading your muscles.
And whatever it is, here's what's important.
Once you identify that one thing, once you figure it out, that's when everything finally
clicks.
That's when you start making serious progress.
It's kind of like typing in your password to log into your computer.
You can have all the letters, numbers, and symbols right, except just one.
And what happens?
You can't log in, right?
But as soon as you get that last remaining character right, voila, you're in business.
And I bet the same can be said
about the body you really want.
You are probably just one major shift,
one important insight,
one powerful new behavior away from easy street.
And that's why I offer VIP one-on-one coaching
where my team and I can help you do exactly that.
This is high-level coaching where my team and I can help you do exactly that. This is high-level coaching
where we look at everything you're doing and we help you figure out that one thing that is missing
for you. And it can be a couple of things too, that's fine. There's no extra charge for that.
But once we figure it out, that's when you start making real progress. That's when you start making real progress. That's when you start looking better and feeling better.
So if you are ready to make more progress in the next three months, then maybe the last
three years, yes, that has happened with many of our clients, head over to buylegion.com
slash VIP, B-U-I-L-E-G-I-O-N dot com slash VIP and schedule your free consultation call, which by the way,
is not a high pressure sales call. It's just a friendly chat where we get to learn about you
and your goals and your lifestyle, and then determine whether our program is right for you.
Because sometimes we do speak with people who just aren't a good fit, but we almost always have
other experts and other resources to refer those people
to. So if you are still listening and you are even slightly interested, go schedule your free
call now at by legion.com slash VIP. Hey, Lori, how's it going? Good. How are you doing?
Good. Good. Thanks. Thank you for taking time to do this. I appreciate it.
Thank you for having me. Yeah. It's been a couple of months since I've done one of these
success story interviews. So I'm looking forward to it. It's always nice to hear and to see
the people who I've done something to help. It's funny because so much of my work
is just sitting in this room, thinking of things and writing things on a –
and a lot of my interactions even with people are just over email.
So I don't get too many opportunities to have like a personal just one-on-one discussion.
So thanks for taking the time.
Yeah, thank you.
So what I like to do with these interviews is start with – Yeah, thank you. or just maybe function or ability or some combination of those factors.
So whatever it is for you.
And then where you're at now, just for the quick contrast, and then we'll rewind.
And I would like to hear what you were doing previously and what was working, what wasn't
working, what you were struggling with.
Sure.
So right before I found you in your work, and the thing is, what you were struggling with? Sure. So right before I found
you in your work, and the thing is, is like, I had your book thinner, leaner, thinner, leaner,
I can't even say the word thinner, leaner, stronger in my Amazon cart. Yes, it is in my cart
for over a year. It was kind of like, you know, one of those things I was like, I'm going to buy
it. I'm going to buy it and buy it. But I just didn't. And I got to a point where I was trying to do a lot of things on my own.
And I got to kind of a breaking point.
I have a lot of things kind of going on in my life.
And I decided to do the one-on-one coaching.
I'd never used a fitness coach of any kind.
I'd used like a personal trainer, like in a gym, like at the time it was like Bali.
So that's how old this is. Like it's a while ago, but I didn't have a personal trainer, like in a gym, like at the time it was like Bali. So that's how old this is.
Like it's a while ago, but I didn't have really great experience.
So I just didn't think it was for me.
But once I did start going down the track of, okay, let me go into the coaching.
I found myself, I guess, starting to see a lot of things and patterns that weren't working
before.
And then also being able to now look at, okay, this is what I want to be doing.
So the before part, I mean, I did every diet under the sun. To have a little bit of background,
I used to be very large. I used to be over 300 pounds. And I had had weight loss surgery,
Roux-en-Y gastric bypass in 2006. So I've had many years of having lost the weight, but never really doing
anything with it. So it was just like, okay, kind of, I think you've called it what skinny fat,
where you just like, you kind of lean out, but you're just like, blah. And I was over looking
like blah. And the messaging that I always heard was cardio, some strength training, but it was
really lightweight, like a five or seven pound dumbbell,
like that kind of stuff. And so kind of transitioning into, you know, doing my own
thing, not really being very active, except for walking, cardio, some stuff like that.
I decided to coaching because I was super uncomfortable with going into the gym
and not really knowing what to do. I'd watched videos. I had tried doing
stuff that I'd seen like influencers doing, and it just like, none of it made sense to me. Like
there was no program. And that's the part that I really appreciated was that it was laid out very
clean and it was something I could walk in there and feel confident, like, okay, know what I'm
going to be doing, what I'm aiming for. And that part I just absolutely loved. So going from like
jumbling everything up from
like all these different sources to then going and having something that is laid out,
helped support me a lot. And I did a three month program with one of your coaches.
And that allowed me to start like kind of integrating myself. So getting out of the
intimidation part, because even signing back up to go to the gym was like a whole thing. It was
like anxiety producing, like, oh my God, I don't know. I don't know if I really want to do this.
And yet I got a lot of encouragement and just kind of this push of like, you know what,
just go for it. Just try it. What's going to happen if, you know, if you do do it and if
you don't do it, like just go and try. And so that part helps support me a lot.
So getting past the gym intimidation
and going into the things like actually doing a deadlift, I'd never done one before and like
making sure I was doing it appropriately. And yeah. So anyways, I feel like I'm blabbering on,
but that's an idea of like where I was a little bit before. And then kind of what I started doing
during the program was actually following what was being given. And it was again, very like clean laid out, um, the app that you guys have available. I absolutely love,
I love, love, love that. Um, so that helped me kind of stay on track, see where I had come from,
like starting, like what was like the weights where I was actually starting with and like where
I'm at right now and seeing the difference. It's like really cool. It's like, see, okay,
wow, I can actually get very strong and, you know, kind of take on the world.
What does that difference look like in actual numbers? Cause we're talking about three months.
A lot of people are surprised. We're just going to ask that is a lot of people are surprised to
see just how much progress they can make in three months when they're doing the most important
things, mostly right.
Most of the time, I like to say it that way because we don't have to be perfect and we're
all going to either slip up here and there, or just life is going to get in the way, but
you just have to be good enough and you have to be good enough in the right places.
That's the key.
Yeah.
So I started like something like, okay, the squat, I did a 40 pound, um, bar and doing
that alone was extremely, it was hard and it hurt.
Like, and my legs were just so sore.
Cause I hadn't trained them like that before.
Now I'm upwards of 110 doing about eight to 10 reps.
And I feel pretty good with that.
Like I feel strong, you know, it's, it feels good.
And I want to good with that. Like I feel strong, you know, it's, it feels good. And I
want to keep going bigger because it's just like, whoa, like this is incredible to go from like
there to there. And then same thing with the deadlift never had done one. So I was just doing
the bar and now that's a one 25 and that also feels good. It doesn't hurt. It just, it's very
manageable. And like the, um, the muscle soreness that I was experiencing at the beginning, I don't feel that anymore. Like I can still do the stuff that I need to do in the rep range that's
recommended. And I don't come out like, you know, shaking, like my legs are like freaking out or,
you know, like it's not to like failure, not like to where like, I'm like, you know, dead.
So I appreciate that. So there is some really big leaps in terms of like what I'm lifting or how
I'm lifting it. And, um, and then weight wise, which was, this is something that I always had in mind,
like the number on the scale makes a big difference as to like what I'm supposed to look like.
And I really didn't change that much. I dropped, I think six pounds, but composition wise, I mean,
my waist got thinner, my hips got thinner and even my thighs, like everything just started kind of like, you know, kind of cutting a little bit.
But so I guess that density part of like, you know, building the muscle, losing the
fat.
And yet I was expecting like, okay, I'm going to lose like maybe like big chunks of weight
during this time period because of like the meal plan and everything.
And you know what?
I was in a different size pant.
I'm almost into a second size down.
So that goes to show you,
like, it doesn't have to be the number on the scale. It's more of like, how is everything
fitting? And that part has made a big difference for me in terms of how I see fitness. And now my
goals, my goals are very different. Like originally in my mind, I was like, Hey, I want to be a
certain weight and I want to, you know, fitness or a certain size pant and no, like I, it's completely changed.
I don't have the same goals at all anymore. For me, it's more about the, uh, progressive overload
getting actually kind of bigger. Um, because I have, uh, the loose skin from being so big from
before I find that like, now that my arms and like certain areas are filling out, it looks better
versus like how it used to like,
kind of just feel drabby, like look. So that's, that's been cool.
Yeah. Those are, those are two, two points that I've heard many women just share is this point
of weight and whether they're going through coaching or some other, maybe they're just
doing Thin or Leaner Stronger, or they've listened to podcasts and they're just going to be applying something that I've spoken about or maybe written about,
is they'll go into it being very weight-centric, even though I talk about it in the book and I
explain to women that you're going to experience this. When you start your transformation,
you're probably going to have an ideal weight in mind. Maybe it's when you were in college, when you were younger, there was a time you remembered
where you really liked how you look and that's associated with a certain body weight. But for
this, because of this point of body composition, I'll bet you a dollar that when you have the body
you want now, you're going to weigh more than you think going into it. And that's only
because as you said, uh, muscle is, is that it's a pound of muscle just doesn't take up nearly as
much space as a pound of fat. So it's pretty easy to add 10 to 15 pounds of muscle to the right
places on your body and, and lose some fat. And then now just look fitter, look even thinner, look fitter,
clothes fit better. Uh, but maybe your weight in, in some cases, women will, they'll reach out to
me and they'll show me before and after pictures and their weight has changed by five pounds,
sometimes zero pounds, but it looks almost like a different person. Um, and because they didn't go
from very overweight, they went from like what you're saying, where they just had normal ish
body fat levels, maybe a little bit high, but, but very little muscle. So, uh, that that's cool.
Then this, um, this loose skin point is also something that, that is a very effective way
to deal with loose skin is to improve your body
composition much more so than trying supplements and diet hacks and um i mean ultimately some
people who have a lot they they want they get they consider getting surgery at some point but
um if if it's not extreme then just improving body composition makes a big difference.
Yeah.
And I'm fortunate in that sense where I don't need to go to the surgery route, but what I do need is to, you know, kind of make certain areas, you know, appear a certain type of
way.
And that way the skin doesn't look the way that, you know, just drabby.
I don't know if I can explain that.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
It tightens.
Everything kind of tightens up when you, when you improve your body composition,
when, when you were starting the, the training, the, the coaching, um, were you concerned
about getting bulky or were you just not concerned about it?
No, because honestly, like there's something that I find, um, attractive on women, especially if they
are kind of top heavy and like bottom heavy. So the bulkiness actually, I'm like, I want to get
a little bulky. Like I'm cool with that. I don't want to be like, you know, super thin to where
it's just like, kind of like a, like a string bean. No, I want to see that definition. I want
to be able to say like, wow, like I can see, um,, my shoulders sticking out or even just like a small bump here,
like that to me is good. So I wasn't concerned about bulking up, but I will say the amount of
protein I was like, whoa, that it seemed like a lot. And I remember reading it in the book,
but like actually putting it into practice, it's really not as hard as it like, as I was making.
How did you get used to that? That's also something that many women will reach out to me and ask for some tips because they go from eating in some cases, 30, 40,
maybe 50 grams of protein per day. And now I'm asking them to eat a hundred, 120 grams,
or even maybe a little bit more. Yeah. It's, um, initially it was just kind of figuring out
the stuff that is protein based because I knew Greek yogurt,
but like I never really put it into practice, something like that. And I, you know, mixing
things into it. I'm not that exciting with food. Like I can eat fairly simple. Like I can eat
chicken almost every day, not really get tired of it, but I also know how to season things quite
well. And so it's like, as long as it tastes good, I don't, it's not a big deal. So I can, I mean, I do, I eat chicken every day, if not multiple times a day
and totally okay with it. Um, but the amount, I always thought I was eating too much and then to
have it almost be permissible, like, Oh, cool. Like you can actually have a pretty solid size
piece of meat or chicken, or even, you know, when it comes to yogurt or, um, just any, any like, uh, uh,
protein powders, those kinds of things. I just didn't, I thought I was overdoing it. And I found
out I wasn't, if anything, I needed more. And so that, you know, it was pretty cool. And I will say
that, um, protein powder, it's, it's been nice to have that and like, it'd be good. And it, in my
mind, I'm like, Oh, it's kind of like having like a frappuccino if I mix it
with ice and all this stuff.
And it's more of a treat versus like just this gritty like thing that you might drink
or have.
And just, it's not something to look forward to.
I actually look forward to it because I make it into something that I enjoy and it fits
the macros that I have.
So yeah, so protein, it was actually getting to a
place where I could actually see the amount on a plate, be able to determine, okay, this is an
appropriate amount. I did measure things out until point now where like, I kind of guesstimate,
you know, for the most part, like, you know, size of your palm, those kinds of things, but
it's not, it's not as overwhelming as it might seem
when I first look at the numbers, it's just substituting different things to be able to
accommodate having more protein. And there's a lot of really good choices. I just didn't,
I wasn't really aware of like what they really were. I always assumed it was kind of like that
chicken broccoli rice. That's, that's like, that's your kind of set meal. And no, like having,
being able to have steak on my meal plan or like shrimp and just different
varieties of things.
It made it easy, like really easy, actually.
I mean, that's, that's a dieting in general.
And I just mean that as a, not, not in the sense of losing weight, but just as a way
of eating diet is a big part of it is making it work for you, making sure that
you should enjoy every meal. And if there's ever a point where you're not enjoying a meal,
where you're kind of just forcing yourself to eat something, you might as well make a change.
You might as well put in something that you're going to enjoy because it just makes compliance
easier. And it also, it keeps you in the right mindset, which is lifestyle, not a short term
thing, not a 30 day, 60, 90 day challenge, but something that like a 30 year plan, you know?
Yeah. And I will say to be in the evenings, because that's part of where I would over
indulge or binge, whether it was like on food or drinks or whatnot. Having a protein shake before bed was, it just, it made it easy to not worry about binging,
but then it's also something sweet.
It just tastes good.
It's, it was something else to like kind of counteract the other things that I would typically
be doing and still support what I'm up to, like what my, my meal plan says.
So how do you like to do your shakes?
It sounds like it's not just powder and water.
It sounds like you like to add other stuff to make it tasty.
Almond milk, usually almond milk, sometimes soy milk.
I get Fairlife skim milk at times.
I mix it up.
So the liquid base is usually some type of milk or plant milk,
and then the protein powder.
And then I'll usually add like a little bit of like mini chocolate chips into the blender with like ice.
Or I buy this sugar-free whipped cream that I'll put on top and then put some sprinkles.
And it just is a little bit better than just like, you know, something you just shook up and drink.
better than just like you know something you just shook up and drink it's i think the ice that part is what really kind of makes it more of a treat or like uh just like a dessert more filling too
because it fills your stomach up more that makes sense it makes total sense so i that's that's
pretty much it it's not like i'm doing all kinds of things where i'm adding fruits or different
things no it's usually like some type of milk and then some type of something sweet or crunchy
to put in there to give it some type of texture.
If you like what I'm doing here on the podcast and elsewhere, definitely check out my sports
nutrition company Legion, which thanks to the support of many people like you is the
leading brand of all natural sports supplements in the world.
You mentioned that you are not, you're just eyeballing, you're eating, it sounds like more
portion control. And were you doing that throughout the coaching period or did you start with
weighing or tracking and then move to portion control?
So I was weighing first because I wanted to make sure, because I honestly, I'd never weighed things
raw. I always assume like, oh, I just like measure out like three ounces of cooked chicken and like
call it a day. And I came to realize that, you know, the raw state versus the cooked state,
And I came to realize that, you know, the raw state versus the cook state, like, especially with chicken, you use, you lose a lot of, of weight.
And so I was either overeating at times under eating at times, just, it wasn't doing, I
wasn't doing it very well.
So what I did was I measured everything out.
Um, cause I would do like a meal prep, measure it out beforehand, understand what it is afterwards,
measure it, see what the difference
was. And then from there over time, because it was the same things, like I said, I ate like the
same stuff pretty frequently. I just changed up the spices or the sauce. So because I was measuring
the raw state and the cook state and understanding the difference between them. Now I feel like
confident enough to be able to measure eyeball. There are certain spoons that
I used, like knowing like if I, this was one scoop, it was about half a cup of something.
So I, it just, that's where I go now. I use my certain utensils, but weighing it not so much,
unless it's something that's highly caloric, then I, you know, just want to moderate that.
But for the most part, it's, it's become easier because I have all those tools in place from
before and having practiced it, it now is where it's pretty easy.
It's not something that I have to overthink or over plan or do a whole bunch of stuff.
It's now just easy.
A lot of great tips in this interview for people who are newer to a lot of this. This is one of them
is, is it's a great exercise to spend a period weighing or tracking. So you can learn just as
you've learned what proper portions look like. And then you also get a sense for how much food
is, let's say you're, let's say you're cutting, right? So you get a sense for, let's
say for you, that's 1500 calories a day or whatever. You get a sense intuitively, even if
you don't even necessarily consciously think about it, you'll get a sense for what that looks like
in terms of your day-to-day eating, or if your maintenance calories are 1900 or 1800 or whatever,
you'll also get a sense for that. And it consistently, the people who do best with intuitive eating,
you could call it that or portion control, or just not, not weighing or tracking anything.
Maybe they have a plan of sorts, but they have always done a lot of weighing and tracking at
some point or a fair amount of it. And they tend to eat a lot of the same foods, the foods they
are familiar with. And like you mentioned, when they start incorporating foods, they're not familiar with,
they might weigh or track just those to get a sense of how they fit in. And once, once you get
into the groove, you can do that more or less indefinitely. I don't know if you've, if you've
gotten to this point yet, but if there's a point when, are you still cutting right now or what are you
doing with your calories? So I am, I'm just now going to be starting cutting again. I went to
maintenance for a little bit and now I'm going back to cutting. So I am, I'm restarting. And so
what, what, um, what, what I, what I have done the last time I cut is like you, I tend to eat the
same foods every day. I change things here and there, but is like you, I tend to eat the same foods every day.
I change things here and there, but I like, I still like eating all the stuff I eat.
I just, food fatigue doesn't seem to, doesn't seem to strike me.
It takes a lot of eating the same thing before I finally want to make a change.
And, and so then I'll take something and either remove it.
So let's say, you know, there was a time when
I was eating an English muffin every day with a peanut butter and jelly on it. And so the cut was
stop eating the English muffin. Cause it was like five or 600 calories. That was it. It was,
I stopped eating the English muffin and I added a little bit of cardio. And that was essentially,
uh, that was most of the cut. I had to make little changes toward the end, but,
Essentially, that was most of the cut.
I had to make little changes toward the end. And then more recently, it was I like to eat oatmeal at night now.
And so that's usually a cup dry.
And then I cook it and put some nuts in it and some fruit like a banana.
So stop eating the oatmeal.
That's it.
That's enough of a calorie deficit.
And sure, if we were trying to compete, trying to get on stage, super shredded, that works until it doesn't work.
There is a point when you really do have to go back to tracking everything because you
don't have the leeway of even a few hundred calories in the day to day, especially when
you're on a timeline.
Like I have to look like this by this date.
If I miss it by three
weeks, I lose, you know what I mean? That's not the case for us. If for most, in most cases,
maybe there is sometimes a specific event, but usually it's like, eh, you know, once it's warmer
around this time, I would like to look this way. And then if I, if I get there, uh, two weeks early,
two weeks late, whatever, it doesn't
really matter.
So when you cut, uh, it sounds like you'll probably take a similar approach, trim something
down or just remove something that creates enough of a calorie deficit and just carry
on.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And I, like what you said, it was like taking something that you would typically eat and
just like removing it makes a lot of sense.
Cause it wasn't something I was considering.
I was going to kind of revamp a few things, but I'll do that approach and just kind of remove like one or two
snacks that I've been having and see how that goes. Yeah. Or you can replace them with something
a little bit lighter, so to speak. If, if you're just, um, let's say, uh, if you, if you're used
to eating at certain times in the day, let's say you're used to having a snack at 3 PM. If you just take it out, you might find that you get a bit hungry because your body is just used to eating at certain times in the day. Let's say you're used to having a snack at 3 PM. If you
just take it out, you might find that you get a bit hungry because your body is just used to being
fed on the schedule that it's on. Um, some people don't mind it and your body will adjust if you,
if you give it, you know, a week or two weeks. Um, but some people, they just prefer to take
what was a 300 calorie snack and make it a hundred
calories snack and then trim another couple hundred calories off of something else.
Like instead of the, uh, the, the cup of oatmeal, like I dry and then cooked, it's a half of
a cup.
And so those two things combined create the calorie deficit, but you can be, you can be
flexible.
I've just found that taking that approach is it makes
it, it makes it easier than like you were saying, okay, I need to, I need to kind of overhaul or
revamp my meal plan. You can do it if you really want to, but it sounds like you're in a, you found
a rhythm that works for you. And so the more you can work with that, the better it will go.
works for you. And so the more you can work with that, the better it will go. Yeah. Thank you.
Yeah. I wanted to hear a little bit more about gym intimidation. This is, this is something that many women experience, many guys as well. Usually it's guys who are very new to this. The guys who
started lifting weights at 15 and now are like in pretty good shape and just want to get super jacked, not usually an issue, but for people who are new to this or people who have a lot of weight to lose.
I was curious to hear maybe some more details in terms of how you felt in the beginning and then how you got through it and how you feel now.
Yeah.
So initially just going into the gym was a big piece.
Like that was like just getting there and walking in.
I live in South Florida.
And so a lot of the gym that I go to, there's a lot of very attractive and very fit people.
And so to walk in there as somebody who wasn't and then, the gym that I go to, there's a lot of very attractive and very fit people.
And so to walk in there as somebody who wasn't, and then didn't know what I was doing.
I just, I had that complex, like people are looking at me or they're going to be judging me or, um, you know, looking to see that, like, I'm like, I couldn't even bench press
the bar.
I had to low, I had to go lower.
I found, um, there's that's, by the way. That's normal.
Okay. Many women start with dumbbells. I actually talk about that in the book that
if you can't do the bar yet, it's normal. Just start with dumbbells. You'll get there.
Yeah. But to take up a bench press and not use the bar, I felt like I was taking up space. And
that was also part of it. I'm like, I don't want to go to the squat rack. If I'm only doing 40 pounds, like
what am I doing there? And so that getting through that part, um, was one getting the
permission to, Hey, I get to take up space, like whether or not I'm using the whole thing,
how it needs to be or how it's intended. I'm here in this moment. Anybody else can, you know, use a different machine or weight or whatnot.
Yeah. You pay your membership dues like everybody else and you're there to train
whether you're using the bar or the bar and all of the plates, it doesn't matter.
But yeah. So initially the intimidation just came around, like whether people were looking
at me, judging my form, you know, the amount that I was doing, because I felt like I was
doing so little compared to the other people around me, because I would look and be, you
know, just kind of eyeballing, like, how is somebody using this machine or how is somebody
using their dumbbells or their barbell?
Like, what are the other things that I don't know about?
And just out of curiosity and seeing some very strong women, it was like, whoa, like that could be me.
So it was intimidating and yet also like goals. Like it was a motivation that, okay, if she can
do it, why not me? Like, why can't I also be there? And getting past all that, a lot of it had to do
with just keeping my headphones in,
listening to music that I enjoyed, kind of like being in my own zone. And then just going forward
and doing it. Even if going into there, my throat was closing up and I'm like, oh God, like, I don't,
this is, you know, I don't, I don't know if I belong here. And then just going anyways and
continuing to do it, the repetitiveness and the consistency, it just died off.
Now I walk in and I don't, I could care less if anyone's looking at me or if they're even
looking at my form or whatever, if they are cool, I hope you enjoy the show.
I don't, I don't know like what else to think about it, but it's so lax in terms of how
I approach it now versus how I was approaching it at the beginning.
And it's, the other thing is not knowing how to use the
equipment appropriately and it just looking dumb, like, you know, like, oh, this like noob who
doesn't know how to use whatever the thing is. And I found that the videos that were a part of
the coaching program helped a lot with certain things that even if they weren't on my plan,
but I was curious about what it was, I could like kind of look through the search, find a video and just like, see what it is.
What is it supposed to be targeting? Um, because I'm just curious like that. I just want to know,
even if I'm not going to use it, it's like, well, what are they doing? Why are they doing it?
And, um, that helped a lot too, in terms of like me feeling more comfortable because I started to
understand like, Oh, like a person would be using this machine for these certain areas or to target these things. Um, so it's nice to know when you're doing it right. We were like,
yes, people can look all they want, but I'm doing it right. And maybe they don't do it right,
but I'm doing it right. Yeah. So, um, so the intimidation, I mean, I get it. Um, for me,
it's, it's just, I'm a little bit more of like an introvert, a little bit more shy. So I just don't,
I don't want to show up in a place like, you know, gyms are really, really open. You have to find a
corner in order to hide. And there's not a lot of corners where there's the dumbbells and the
squat rack and the chest press machine. It's, it's in the middle. So like I had to like be out in the
open and that part, you know, getting through that was also, um, supportive for me in terms of my confidence and, and just
feeling like, okay, again, going back to the, I get to take up space in this place and like,
not feel like, you know, Oh, I'm taking something from somebody else, but just, you know, there to
work out and do the same thing everyone else is doing. And was the experience once you got into
the routine, was it, was it different than the expectation? And the reason I asked that is
many women in particular have, have shared, have shared a similar experience, similar story.
And, and then they learned that most of the people in the gym are way more interested in themselves than anyone else.
And, and then they're usually are, are, um, instances where the, where somebody will
actually compliment them. They'll see that they're working hard or doing something right
that many people do wrong. And, and the point is that, that many people learn that a lot of people in the gym are friendlier than you might have thought
going into it or pay absolutely no attention to other people whatsoever. It's usually one or the
other. Yeah. I've experienced both where there's people that they are literally in their zone.
They're looking at themselves in the mirror.
They're looking like they're on their phone and doing their own thing while they're waiting,
you know, in between stuff.
They're not looking around at other people and staring and being creepy or weird or not.
None of that.
Like it's people actually doing their own thing.
The other thing that I found, like you said, there's actually some really nice people.
I see the same people day in and day out because I go at the exact same time. So there's usually like a wave or kind of like just something really quick, interactive,
not a lot of talking, but just kind of an understanding like, Hey, like I saw you yesterday.
I saw you again.
Like, and it's just a quick thing.
I've had women be very kind, especially when it comes to like in the locker room and just,
you know, there's camaraderie there. And I like that a lot. So, you know, not that I'm like making friends or
anything, but it's, there's just the ability to appreciate another person and say like, Hey,
like I see you, you see me and you just wave or, you know, do something that's, that's kind.
And it's not the intimidating thing that I was expecting.
I mean, there are people who can like throw the weight really, really hard. And it kind of makes
me jump because I'm not expecting it, but that's not, it's not rude. Like, it's not like before I
was like, are they like making all these noises for a reason? Like what's happening? And why are
you breathing so heavy? Or like making like some really crazy noises come from people.
And yet I'm like,
you know what?
Like do your thing.
Like it's fine.
Cause I just wasn't used to it.
You can't take it personally.
That's,
that's just part of the ritual to them.
Yeah.
Yeah.
And maybe I feel like I should be doing it too.
So maybe I'll come up with my own sound,
but,
but yeah,
no,
it's,
it's actually,
it's a good environment.
It's not the intimidating place that I thought it was where super fit. people are just checking out the people that are the noobs that don't know what
they're doing and like being critical if anything snickering and yeah nothing nothing no this is not
high school it's you can tell there's mature people hanging out like just doing their thing
and yeah so it's not as big of a deal as I was making it out to be. Now you, you mentioned you want to do another round of cutting and why, why is that? What are
you going for, um, in the short term and then in the longterm? Cause you mentioned also, you want
to see, um, you want to get stronger and you want to add some more muscle to certain places.
you want to add some more muscle to certain places? So I've had this goal when I turned 30,
I'm 36. When I turned 30, I was like by 40, I think maybe I'll try to do a competition.
Don't know why. I just thought it was a cool idea. Now. I mean, that's not where I'm going for,
but the idea that I could actually have a figure of some kind that I could appreciate and like,
um, is real now, like before it was like an idea, but now it's in practice.
And so what I want to do is continue to lean out a little bit.
And then, you know, like you said, put muscle on the certain areas that is going to look
good.
But I do want to get to a point where it is kind of a lean bulk cut, lean bulk cut until
I get to that place of like a real maintenance.
So that's for me now, it's more like just long-term, but yeah, it's just part of like
what I'm up to right now. It's been a while. I've been about a month now in maintenance
and I'm ready to go back and do a cut and see what can show up.
What are your thoughts?
And this is just your own personal take on this.
It doesn't have to apply to other people.
They all have their own opinions.
But what are your thoughts on or what would be your reply to people who, when they hear that, they think, why don't you just be happy with where you're at?
Why do you want to, oh, you look oh, you look great or, or you look so much better than, than most people.
And some people would see it as, um, maybe, maybe even an unhealthy way of viewing yourself. And
that, that self-acceptance and self-love is much more important than self-improvement in the way
that you're looking at it? I'm glad you actually asked me this because my previous position and
job, I used to work at an eating disorder treatment center. And that was the message,
which was health at any size. Don't worry too much about your looks. And for a the message, which was health at any size. Like, don't worry too much about your looks.
Like it's, you know, and, you know, for a long time, I took on that message as well.
But why not be able to also clean up your body and your health and do something because
you enjoy it and you like it?
Like, why not?
It shouldn't be something where someone is put down or kind of looked at as like, oh, but like this might become an unhealthy obsession or like, why are you being vain?
Or like, what's your intention?
What's your goal behind that?
Yeah.
Like what hole are you trying to fill?
You know?
Yeah.
And no, there's no hole.
I was the majority of my life, or at least my younger years, I was very, very big.
I didn't get to enjoy having a thin body
or looking a certain type of way. And when I got to that place of like, okay, cool. I'm going to
accept myself where I'm at. Um, you know, it's, it's just, I'm not, I'm not going to just be okay
with kind of like in my mind, mediocre. I feel like I can really challenge and push myself.
And that's a lot of what I've learned through this coaching part was it's not so much about what I'm going to look like
aesthetically, but how much am I going to be able to do? I really do take the strength part very
seriously. Like I like the ability that I can, I have a two-year-old, he's 30 pounds. I used to
struggle holding him. I don't anymore with one arm. He's just boom. Like he's up here and like no problem. And so there's a lot of functionality that I'm getting out of it,
but I also want to be able to appreciate like what I've done too. So I don't know. I think
that it's okay for a person to, you know, yes, love yourself where you're at, but if you want
to challenge yourself and it has to do with looks, it doesn't mean that you don't love yourself.
And it doesn't mean that, you know, you also get to stay in a certain place in order to kind of
meet the norm of not going in too much or doing too much. Um, I think that me choosing to kind
of go back and forth where it's like, I'm going to cut. And then if, you know, when I get to that
place of actually looking, I'm not, I'm nowhere close yet. Cause I feel like there's a lot more
that I could do. Um, I'm excited about it. I'm not scared at all. If anything, I'm nowhere close yet because I feel like there's a lot more that I could do.
I'm excited about it. I'm not scared at all. If anything, I'm like, cool. That means that like,
I'm going to be putting on more muscle and there's going to be more definition, the ability to look a certain type of way and feel good in, you know, certain types of clothes or feel like it looks
appropriate on me. That's exciting. So to each his own, but I don't think that it's a bad thing. If you want
to work on yourself, especially if it's, you know, for looks or if it's not for looks, if it's for
health, but I, I'm, I'm a proponent of like, go for it, whatever it is that feels good to you and
how you want to do it. And at least 50% of the reason that every single person you see in the gym every day or every day that you're there, at least 50% of the reason they're there is because they want to look a certain way.
And there's nothing wrong with that.
There's nothing wrong with wanting to look good.
And looking good means different things to different people.
You had mentioned to many women when they get into weightlifting or resistance training,
they're concerned about bulky.
That's a thing for many women.
That was not a thing for you.
And so your look of how you want to look to other women, they might think, oh, that's
a little bit bulky for me.
And so the point is, you know how you want to look.
know how you want to look. And, uh, that's not, that's not, it's not narcissistic to want to look good. And it's okay to have your own idea of what looking good is, even if it is how most other
people want to look like my idea for, for men of what looks good is pretty normal. Like I don't,
I don't personally want to be a big jack
bodybuilder and I don't also necessarily want to be a swimmer. I want to be something very in
between those, uh, maybe more towards the swimmer than the big jack bodybuilder, but yeah, that's
pretty normal. There's nothing really special about how I want to look, but that's okay because
it appeals to me. And, and I think it's just important for people to, to, to be able to distinguish between, um, what is healthy and what is unhealthy. Like, yes,
exercise, quote unquote addiction. I say that because it's not quite addiction in the same
sense of drug addiction, but yes, that's the thing. And body dysmorphia, that's a thing, but that is not common in everyday gym goers.
It's more common.
You're going to see it more in maybe competitors, people who, whether it's bodybuilding or physique
or people who, athletes as well, in some cases, there is a point, yes, we can take this stuff too far,
but the vast majority of people like you, like me, we don't check any of the boxes for
exercise addiction or body dysmorphia. And so, you know, I think it's kind of ironic in that if you were to comment on somebody who is very large, maybe they would say, oh, you're fat shaming.
But if you were to criticize somebody like for what you're doing where you're saying, hey, I like being strong.
I like getting fitter.
I like fitting in my clothes better.
I like where my body composition is going.
If somebody criticizes you, well, is that not, is that fitness shaming then?
Yeah. We're going to apply the same standards, you know?
That's what it sounds like. Yeah.
Yeah. Yeah. But, um, but anyways, that's, um, that that's great. I really enjoyed
hearing your story. Something that we try to do with, with coaching is we really want people to be able to
continue on their own if they want to, like really want people to understand why they're doing what
they're doing and not just keep it, um, where there's kind of a black box that, that they just,
you don't know where these recommendations come from. You don't know how they work exactly because that, of course, then would make you more
reliant on us to continue.
And from the beginning, I always wanted to do the opposite.
I wanted to give people as much education as they wanted.
But really, ideally, and this is part of the sales pitch, is after three months, I want
you to fire us.
You don't have to if you want to keep going, but I want you I want you to fire us. You don't have to, if you want to keep going,
but I want you to be able to fire us. And we'll be here later if you want to come back. And many
people do come back, they'll go off for six months and then they'll come back just to get
kind of a tune up. How was that in particular for you? The tools helped me be able to kind of
continue on. I mean, I feel like there's a lot of education that I got during the coaching that allowed me to start being able to discern like, okay, what's
like, where am I going from here? Like, like I said, I reassessed my goals. My goals are no
longer the same as what I had originally started with. And now I can make more appropriate ones
about like the amount that I want to be lifting or the composition, like the measurement that I want to see, like those
kinds of things are different, but yeah, there's a lot that I learned that I'm taking forward
now that I feel like really confident in.
Okay.
I think I'm doing the right thing.
And if not, those little tweaks that I might need to make were also things that were discussed
with my coach.
Like, okay, well, if this were to happen or, you know, this is where we're going to be
tweaking things. I remember how we did that. And so I feel confident in being able
to move forward and do another cut without having to, you know, kind of be like black box. I go,
I can't cut without somebody here. I need someone to hold my hand or I need like the new, like the
new rules. Maybe there's other rules for this cut and no. Or where macros or calories change every week and you don't know why. And then you're led to
believe that that is, that's a, that's a really important part of the process. If you, if you get
even one of those numbers wrong, that's it. Your, your body comp is, is done.
It's over. No, not at all. Like it all. It's very straightforward. And like I said, there was a lot
of education that I got during the time too, that allowed me to continue to progress and ask the
appropriate questions to get the answers so that moving forward now, I feel good. For example,
like a lean bulk, I haven't done that with somebody. And I think having a coach for that
would be supportive, but knowing that the tools that I got already
for the cut that I did, the lean bulk information I'm going to get is going to be able to propel
me forward and be able to move.
So yeah, it's, I feel like I've got kind of all the information that I need to be able
to continue down my, my path and my journey to, you know, better body to a little bit
of weight loss, but getting stronger, be like above all of it. Awesome. Well, you have to keep me posted on how it goes. It sounds like it's going to,
it's going to go great. Uh, I'm confident in you've, you've, you've, you've sold me for sure.
Um, but, but yeah, thanks again for, for taking the time to do this and keep up the good work.
Thank you so much. I appreciate you.
Well, I hope you liked this episode. I hope you found it helpful. And if you did,
subscribe to the show because it makes sure that you don't miss new episodes. And it also helps me
because it increases the rankings of the show a little bit, which of course then makes it
a little bit more easily found by other people who may like it just as much as you.
And if you didn't like something about this episode or about the show in general,
or if you have ideas or suggestions or just feedback to share,
shoot me an email, mike at muscleforlife.com, muscleforlife.com,
and let me know what I could do better or just what your thoughts are about
maybe what you'd like to see me
do in the future. I read everything myself. I'm always looking for new ideas and constructive
feedback. So thanks again for listening to this episode and I hope to hear from you soon.