Muscle for Life with Mike Matthews - Motivation Monday: The Curse of Complaining
Episode Date: September 25, 2017This episode is part of a weekly series that I have dubbed “Motivation Monday.” (Yes, I know, very creative of me. What can I say, I’m a genius…) Seriously though, the idea here is simple: Eve...ry Monday morning, I’m going to post a short and punchy episode that I hope gets you fired up to tackle the workouts, work, and everything else that you have planned for the week ahead. As we all know, it’s one thing to know what you want to do, but it’s something else altogether to actually make yourself do it, and I hope that this series gives you a jolt of inspiration, energy, and encouragement to get at it. So, if you like what you hear, then make sure to check back every Monday morning for the latest and greatest installment. Want to get my best advice on how to gain muscle and strength and lose fat faster? Sign up for my free newsletter! Click here: www.muscleforlife.com/signup/
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Hey, this is Mike from Muscle for Life and welcome to another episode of my podcast.
This episode is part of a weekly series that I have dubbed Motivation Monday. Yes, I know,
so creative of me. What can I say? I'm just a genius.
Seriously though, the idea here is simple. Every Monday morning, I am going to post a short and
punchy episode that I hope gets you fired up to tackle the workouts, work, and everything else
that you have planned for the week ahead. Because it's one thing to know what you want to do, but it's something else altogether
to actually make yourself do it. And I hope that this series gives you a jolt of energy and
encouragement to go ahead and do all of those things that you want to do. So if you like what
you hear, then make sure to check back every Monday morning for the latest and greatest installment.
Quote, be less concerned with what you have than with what you are. Socrates, I want you to think
about your last couple of days. How many times did you hear someone complain about something?
Maybe it was a moan about something petty like the weather, or a groan about something
personal like the holiday weight that they still haven't lost, or a gripe about something more
significant like the economy or political circus. My guess is you've recalled dozens if not scores
of conversations, emails, texts, and tweets that involved, if not revolved, around complaining.
And maybe you have even joined in a little bit yourself.
Now, we all grouse from time to time, but for many people, grumbling isn't an exception.
It's just a way of life.
These people are obsessed with what's wrong, and they will vent about anything and everything without
aim or purpose. Why? Why devote so much time and so much energy to whining when it's scientifically
proven to increase stress and anxiety levels, to sour mood and lead to more negative thinking,
and even hamper progress towards solutions and goals? Why do that when one-tenth of that time
and energy put into finding solutions instead could really change things for the better?
Why are these people so committed to such an ineffective and pathological strategy?
Well, for many of them, it's because they just love being a victim. They love how it
arouses sympathy. It lowers expectations, excuses negativity, and relieves the burden of personal
responsibility. And they love how putting their difficulties on display convinces people to
judge them more favorably for their shortcomings and failures and praise them more enthusiastically
for their successes.
Sigmund Freud commented on this, writing that neurotics complain of their illness, but make
the most of it.
And when it comes to taking it away from them, they will defend it like a lioness, her young.
Don't be one of these people.
It's Monday morning.
A guy is curling in the squat rack.
You don't make enough money.
The free coffee shop Wi-Fi is too slow.
It's too cold outside because it's January.
Your friend's Facebook status updates always have typos.
Someone left the toilet seat up.
My point is every one of us can find an endless number of things to bellyache over.
But why?
Why dig the hole deeper?
Hey, quickly, before we carry on, if you are liking my podcast, would you please help spread
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Everything that happens is either endurable or not, wrote the legendary Roman emperor and stoic
philosopher Marcus Aurelius. If it's endurable, then endure it. Stop complaining. If it's
unendurable, then stop complaining. Your destruction will mean its end
as well. Just remember, you can endure anything your mind can make endurable by treating it as
in your interest to do so, in your interest or in your nature. So don't go looking for sympathy.
Honestly, most people, they don't care about your problems and many of them are secretly
glad that you have them. Don't compromise your standards. No matter what you do, remember that
moderation will not get you very far. Nothing succeeds like excess. Don't shirk your duties.
Remember that the more you choose to suffer voluntarily, the less you will suffer involuntarily.
Whatever you do, just don't whinge.
In 1961, a group of more than 400 black and white Americans risked their lives to travel
together on buses and trains through the deep south, flouting Jim Crow laws.
They would come to be known as the Freedom Riders, and they
endured bitter racism, savage beatings, firebombing, and even imprisonment. 45 of these people landed
in the maximum security wing of the Mississippi State Penitentiary for their non-violent activism,
and instead of feeling sorry for themselves or bickering amongst each other,
they displayed remarkable solidarity and esprit, singing hymns, spirituals, and freedom songs
instead. This was completely unacceptable to the jail authorities who threatened to remove
all mattresses from their cells if they didn't stop caroling. Soon after the ultimatum, one of
the riders named Hank Thomas, he rushed to the bars
and he shouted for the guards to come and get his mattress. I'll keep my soul, he cried.
This insubordination sparked the rest of the cell block to sing We Shall Overcome and hurl
their mattresses against their cell doors to be removed as well. Weeks went by and only a few of
the riders even asked for their mattresses
back. Instead, most of them slept on steel springs and continued to sing through all of the punishment,
which included standard intimidation tactics, as well as more extreme measures like drenching them
with fire hoses and then blasting them with giant fans at night to make it too cold to sleep,
and then closing all the
windows during the day to bake them in the Mississippi summer heat. None of that, though,
had the intended effect. The riders refused to stop singing. Now, the moral of that little story
is very simple. If you don't like something, do something to change it. Don't complain,
do something to change it. Don't complain, just work harder. And if ultimately you can't change it, no matter how undeserved or unreasonable it is, then change your mind about it. To quote
Aurelius again, choose not to be harmed and you won't feel harmed. Don't feel harmed and you
haven't been. So remember this, when someone deals mostly in complaints,
all they're really saying is that they lack the gumption to act, to have the courage of their
convictions. Instead, they choose to sit on the sidelines and do the only thing they're really
capable of, which is carping and criticizing those that are actually in the arena, struggling and striving. Pay these
people no mind. Hey there, it is Mike again, and I just wanted to say that I hope you enjoyed this
episode and found it interesting and helpful. Now, if you'd like to read about all this stuff as well,
then head over to muscleforlife.com, that's muscleforlife.com, and legionathletics.com, L-E-G-I-O-N
athletics.com, because I've published over a million words of free articles on the blogs on
those websites on all types of things related to building muscle, losing fat, and getting healthy.
New articles go up every week on both sites as well. So if you like what
you read, then definitely hop on my mailing list and you will be notified when new stuff goes live.
My email subscribers also get exclusive deals on my products and services and other goodies.
So there's that too. Thanks again for listening to this episode and I will see you in the next one.
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