My Brother, My Brother And Me - MBMBaM 392: Big Game Tony Sunday

Episode Date: February 5, 2018

We're breaking down all the wild twists and turns of Big Game Tony Sunday, a game we definitely had not watched at the time of this recording. Our prophecies, as per usual, ended up being eerily accurate. Suggested talking points: Super Bowl Predictions (Again), Kissing Curry, Armpit Bird, Cookie Angel Test, Wake Up to Bagels, I Like-A Do Whaaaat?!?!

The McElroy brothers are not experts, and their advice should never be followed. Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it. Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mentioned only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby? Hello everybody, and welcome to my brother. My brother made advice show for the modern era. I'm your oldest brother, Justin Pigskin McElroy. I'm Travis Touchdown McElroy. And I'm Griffin McElroy. I'm a hologram this time. Couldn't get the real me. Couldn't get the meet me. This time, it's the hologram one for this time, the episode. We all loved the big game

last night, and a lot of fun was had by all and congratulations. Or none was. It's possible no fun was had. Or maybe it all ended in a tie and everybody just went home. Yeah, and they fell in love. All the New Englands fans fell in love with all the Philadelphia fans. Anything's possible in football, and that's what's so exciting and dynamic about this sport. That's why Vince is getting in on the action. We wanted to say in our second consecutive football intro, to both the teams, you'll get them next year. Yeah. Or you got them this year. Or you did get them this year. Maybe they both went. Got them. Maybe they both went. Maybe they did do the thing, and then the Eagles went, and they're like, you know what guys, we had so much fun. And we still have lots of fun

Doritos commercials that we didn't even have time to do because they they won the game in three periods. So let's just do you guys want to play again? What do they do if they finish the game early? Has that ever happened all the time all the time? And they're just like, what do we do with this leftover? Because we already got the top score. Yeah. And we can't play anymore. As we all know, if your team gets to 69 points, you instantly win whether or not you're ahead. Because some if you go over game, you lose. Well, no, but you just don't win. So like you may want to you overshoot it, right? Oh, shoot, why did we go for two? We had 68 points. And now we're at we have 70. Well, that means we don't get the instant one. And somebody else comes in and gets 69. Nice,

they win. But it's only been one period. And it's like, wow, yeah, our defense fucking sucks. Oh, somebody caught the snitch already. Somebody in the game. That's the thing that you don't talk about in in Quidditch, by the way, of like, if somebody catches the snitch to the first five minutes, and you fucking paid like 800 Krugels or whatever for your like box seats, and you're like, oh, they get it's been three minutes and the game's done. Do I get my Krugels back? No, I just want to step in here. It's it's it would be Bitcoin. That is what wizards and warlocks use. And that's why I can't find a motherfucking graphics card for my computer just because, you know, Hagrid's buying them all up, reselling them on eBay for 1000 bucks piece of shit.

So big predictions for the game this year. I have a lot of money down on like 30 bucks on one that is probably not going to happen. But if it does, it has like a 100 times buyout. So that would be like 300 bucks is the Rapture happens in the middle of the game. And everyone just, well, not everyone, but most people. Well, not most people. Just Tom Brady. I mean, let's say it just Tom Brady. Jesus is going to let Tom Brady in after all the deflate gate. I don't think so. Jesus is my Jesus loves hard, full balls, not these soft ones that Tom likes to play with. My prediction is that if if I have to figure out the right tense here, if they will have one, if the Patriots will have one in the past, right? Yeah. Then during the post game

interview, they're going to say to Tom Brady, like, what are you going to do now? And he's going to say, I'm going to go fuck that beauty rest mattress I've had my eye on. Yeah. Yeah. He loves to do that puts his wiener. Yeah, you all seen that commercial, right? Where he's definitely going to have sex with that mattress. And the dude's like, will there be anything else? And he's like, no, I'm just going to go fuck that mattress. And he fucks a mattress, huh? Yeah. Well, in the extended version, they, they edit it for TV, but you can find it on YouTube where there's like a just a solid 10 minute rest of the commercial where he's just he fucks. And you know what? I'll say it makes love. You said YouTube likes that. YouTube wants that content on their channel.

YouTube loves it. You can see Tom Brady make love to a mattress on YouTube. All right. And search for those words exactly. Yeah, explicitly. One of the things that I'm going to love, I did love was the Prince hologram. Now, what's fun about the Prince hologram is everybody, I think people started joking about it at some point. And then everybody started saying like, yeah, actually, now that I think about it, the way things are going, there will probably be Prince hologram. Yeah. So Justin Timberlake and Sheila E. got on the, got on the phone. Sheila E takes to Twitter and is like, don't even trip. JT assures me there's no hologram. But like, if I was going to drop a hologram, that's exactly the environment I want to drop it into.

Yeah. Because when you're not expecting a hologram, that's when you're going to love it the most. Like, and you know, Sheila E. can't keep a secret. Here's what I want. Telegraph, tell a Sheila E. I want, if it will have happened that like the hologram pops up and everybody's kind of like, uh, and then like JT tries to like throw it off to Prince and Prince just like shakes his head. Yeah. I would love it. A hologram of Prince who was explicitly against ever being a hologram ever was just like, actually, no, dude, you can't just sort of fucking conjure me there. JT. I mean, it's fucked that you get to do the Super Bowl again anyway. And yeah, we all remember. We all kind of remember that. This is mine now.

No, JT, I think maybe calm down for just a minute because it's not, you don't get to have Prince's sort of essence. Do you know what I mean, dude? Like, here's the one, here's the one way I'm okay with them doing a Prince hologram. Right. Just look at the ice below you, bud. You can see the water right through. It's while JT is performing, they just cut to the stands and Prince is just like sitting in a seat like eating some popcorn. Come back to Justin Timberlake, right? And then people are just like, wait, was that a Prince hologram? Hold on. And then at the end of it, Justin Timberlake is banned from the Super Bowl for life. Well, congratulations to everybody. I guess is what we're trying to get at. We're all winners. It kind of feels like we all want,

and those commercials don't get me started on the ad. You know what? I only watch the big game, which we have to call it. I only watch the big game for the ads. Tony, can you go back and edit out every time we said Super Bowl and put in Big Game Tony? No, don't put in Big Game Tony. Why are you laughing? Don't put in Big Game Tony. We don't call it Super Bowl, Big Game Tony. I mean, we can if you want. You've been trying to get Big Game Tony going for a long time, and we told you it's not going to happen. It's not happening. Ladies and gentlemen, welcome to Big Game Tony 52. It's Big Game Tony Sunday. Are you ready for some Tony? Hey, folks, all our big screen TVs are on sale to celebrate Big Screen Tony Sunday. Come on down for this

Big Screen Tony sale. Holy shit, Big Game Tony Sunday. Let's actually help people for a change. I think we just help people with some good jokes about the Big Game Tony. Hi, brothers. I work as a waiter at a Thai restaurant from 5.30 to 11. Seems unnecessary, but thank you for the specificity. You'll find out why. One of the highlights of working here is there's a family style meal the staff gets for dinner, which the chefs put extra special love and care into. However, if it's a slow night, my boss will sometimes tell me I can go home early. That sounds nice. What this means is that I don't get dinner from the kitchen because the chefs and waiters usually eat around 10.

Sometimes I can literally smell the curry cooking when my boss tells me to go home, and I have to live with the fact that I don't get to eat it instead of have to survive on cereal or leftover pasta. When my boss tells me to go home, is it acceptable for me to say no, Ashley? I'd like to stay for dinner. Thank you very much. Or is that absolutely crazy? That's from Tongue Tide in New Jersey. This is... Well, see, here's the... Okay, the reason you get to stay home is because there's not enough business to justify paying for you to be there. What is the window of time that you would have to be within 10 o'clock that it would not be weird if you said, okay, I'm off the clock,

but I'm going to stick around until dinner time, right? Is that 15 minutes? 30 minutes? Two hours? Two hours. It's not two hours. I think if it's about to pop off, I think you're fine to be like, can I... You mind if I kick it and just eat because I would love to just grub here if that's fine by you. The boss is like, grub away. Grub away. This was challenging for me because my two favorite things in Earth is eating and not working. And so it sounds like these two things are so diametrically opposed. If you tell me I'm going to send you home an hour early, I think that's another hour monster hunter I can play before my body has to go to sleep. And that's very good to me. It's almost as good as eating this good free food, it sounds like, which is also

something I'm extremely into. So in my mind, you're looking at a win-win. This is a great job because the win-win, every night you work, either you get to go home early and spend an hour or two doing shit you'd rather do than work, or you work the whole time, blah, but then you get to eat some yum stuff. And that's very good too. I think you need to celebrate sort of either way this thing breaks. But that's what I was saying. I think 20 minutes, half hour of like, okay, cool, I'm off the clock. Because you could ostensibly just shoot the shit with the boss until dinner. Well, as long as I'm here. Oh, stall them in a conversation. That's very good, Travis, where it's like, you don't explicitly ask to be sent home. You just enjoy their company so much that

eventually it'd be rude for you to leave then. The dinner's coming out. It's time for me to just kick it. Can we talk for a second about getting sent home early from work? Because there's really nothing better than that. And the fun thing about that is you don't get paid for when you get sent home early from work. And you ostensibly got a job because you did want to get paid for time rendered. But that value proposition, something about getting sent home an hour early, that value proposition just goes straight out the window. If you could just strain together weeks of getting sent home early, I mean, again, financially, you're going to be in ruin. It just nothing goes down sweeter than that. And you absolutely lose that when you work for yourself. Because I remember

even before working from home when I worked at the theater, I wasn't hourly. I was salary. And so leaving early was a decision I made and always made me feel guilty and bad. But having a boss type person who looks at me and goes, this decision isn't up to you. I'm telling you to go home and take a nap. It's like, okay. I like it the opposite. I edit them a BIM BAM. And then I'm like, time to yank the old pterodactyl, the old pterodactyl whistle and clock in. Okay. Okay. So I can flip since it's not living. Okay. Wow. Okay. You should have gotten to the end of that sentence quicker, Griffin. My oh, oh, my back in that podcast. It's flaring up against the rainstorms coming in better punch out place a monster hunter for nine hours. Oh, my back.

You've earned it. I think I earned it. Um, they at the podcast minds or just you probably just take the food, right? Like nobody's going to yell at you. Well, not if it's not ready. I mean, it's curry. You could probably just throw it on the pot at home and get it, get it to where it needs to be. Oh, that's good. Okay. Griffin has a great point. What you do is you go to the kitchen with a Tupperware and you just start scooping things out of pots as they're cooking. Like, don't worry, bro. I'll finish this one at home. Yeah. I mean, curry is a lot of principal work, right? It's a lot of chopping and screwing and, uh, boiling and then simmering and then simmering and then really like 90% of it's just mostly simmering. Do that at home. You just throw it on

the pot and then you're ready for it. Yeah. That's a real good way to cut out the love and care too that the chefs usually provide if you consistently say, well, I could just do this myself. I feel like the love and the care is in the mise en place. Like after that, it's just, it's just heat and time. Like you could do that. Yeah. Stovetop don't care. Stovetop love. It's all right, guys. I'll nuke it at home. How long do you think I need to nuke this to finish up your work? I'm not saying curry is easy to cook. It's extremely difficult. But what me and Justin are saying is like most of that stuff comes in the beginning of it when you sort of build the house that the curry is going to live in and then you sort of let that house settle on the stovetop. And I think it comes right at

the end when the person lifts the lid at the very end to check it, kisses the surface of the curry. Yes. And that's where the love gets infused into it. And you know, really, like a master curry chef by how blistered and horribly scarred their lips are from kissing. It's extremely hot stuff. And can they get the lipstick print to stay on the surface of the curry? It's hard, man. Yeah. Don't you guys hate when you get takeout curry and you take a bite, you're like, oh, you can tell they've only kissed it like two or three times? It's like, if I had known that when I was there, I would have just asked for extra kisses while I was already there. I could drive back out to get the rest of my kisses. And not only that, Justin, it's also like the peanut butter where

you open it up and there's the surface level, right, where the kiss was. And if that's already been scooped out and you're getting down to like the middle of the peanut butter, it like, did the kiss make it all the way down there? You know what I mean? So that's the problem is someone makes a big old pot of curry, like a big old pot that kiss the top. Even if they kiss it 10 times, is that really making it to the bottom third of the curry? The thing is you have to kiss your ingredients as you go. That's the only way to make sure that you're really well covered. How about Yahoo? Blue Apron kisses all your stuff for you, so you don't have to worry about that. Shows up pre-smooched. You do have to kiss your own salt and pepper and olive oil though.

Yes. So that's the disposable ramekin of kisses in case you want to add more and you can handle it? Yeah. This one was sent in by the delivery man, Seth Carlson. Thank you, Seth. It's Yahoo answers user. Miniminateckel asks, do doves like being used for magic tricks? Huh. Ethics. Ethics, y'all. Been watched a lot of good places, just the ethics though of this one is a real challenge. Is this, okay, how is this not already a cartoon movie? I've got, hold on, cartoon movie. Hey Travis, read me everything on that shitty notepad right now. I want to know everything you got. No, no, no. I'm googling it first just to make sure. Okay, understand what I think about you and sort of how your brain works that I was 100% sure you had a notebook full of

half-baked movie. No, I absolutely do. In my phone, I do keep a running note. The other day, I just wrote down taglines for movies that don't exist and my favorite one was she's one hip granny and it's about a grandmother who gets hip surgery and has a bionic hip that maybe turns into a superhero or some kind of dance champion. Yeah. Don't know how to flesh it out. I think it would be hard to make a compelling animated feature about a bird that spends multiple hours at a time in a man's armpit. Yeah. That, I don't think that that, like you could, you could get Jason Sudeggas to do the voice if you wanted to. Still would not be. The footage, the visual elements. Just the visual element of very dark. That's a good twist for the ending though. Like a bird, like a dove

who's trying to, maybe it's a pigeon, right? Who isn't a dove and the pigeon's trying to break into show business. Everyone's like, we only bring dozen here and the pigeon's like, I can do it, right? And the pigeon's training. And then at the end, he's like, oh, yeah, you know what, you made it. Come on bird. But then the bird, the end of the movie is just like him in a sleeve. And he's like, oh, this isn't, oh wait. Yeah, it sucks. All right, let's, let's break it down. Pros and cons. Okay. The con, I think that, like any performer, the dove probably hates the part where she's in a person's armpit. But then for many hours, that part is probably not a big hit. But I think that the dove probably loves the part where everybody's like, oh, shit, a dove.

Yeah. Like that's gotta be thrilling. Think of a time where you are that excited to see a bird. It's almost, pretty much never. My, my like interest in birds is a sliding scale to they're up in the sky. They're in a tree. Okay. They're right in front of me on the sidewalk as I'm walking towards them. I'm a little interested. I hope that thing flies away before I get to it. It almost certainly will. I'm not worried about it too. It gets in my house somehow. Oh God, oh God, I'm extremely interested in this bird, but not really excited for its presence. Yeah. To, oh shit, where did that thing even come from? Probably the armpit, but that's still kind of an impressive feat. Now to counteract, counteract the counter for the armpit thing,

is magicians are known to train their bodies to get a lot of space in there. I don't know, like pen, pen has like, you could get like a gallon and a half of water inside of pins armpit. Yeah. It's a deep, deep, deep pit. Chris Angel, before he started doing sort of more transgressive magical acts, he did a lot of sort of dove work. You, I mean, you could eat an entire bowl of gazpacho, like a full, like full belly's worth of gazpacho out of that dude's pit. If you were, if you were nasty, he actually had a lot of his dove pockets removed to make it harder on him to do magic because it was just, he lost sort of thrill of it. Yeah. You know, I'm too easy. I'm thinking about what that moment must be like for the dove, right? You're in a dark

armpit, you know, and you're like, I hate this. And then you come out the sleeve and you're like, you get half a second of like, oh, yes, I'm out. And then it's all bright lights and techno music and people clapping really loudly. And you're probably like, put me back in that armpit. This sucks. It's probably a little bit spooky. I've never been physically present for a show where a dove is magically sent out in the audience after a magician does his incredible trick. Um, I think that would be highly distracting because that has gone from magic trick almost instantly devolves from magic trick into serious scenario. I would be clocking that bird for the rest of the program, just making sure that its movements did not hove into my sort of like

action scene because what somebody in the audience has to get the dove. Like somebody's gonna have to grab the dove. Yeah. Well, I think the closest we've come just as when we went to the pirate adventure. And they sent out a big old parrot, big old parrot, made a loop. And then I get never showed up again for the rest of the show, which I do have to think like, I wish I could do that as a performer, like being a player, I just come out pre show. Hi everybody. And then I sit backstage. Here's a big wild dog. I'm just gonna let it out into the audience for the rest of the show. Keep an eye on it. Don't look at it. How come Parrot is okay to be out inside bird? But pretty much most other birds, if they're outside in the house, it's like,

if I go into a house and there's a parrot just like chilling, not in any sort of captivity, I'm like, yeah, all right. Any other bird, I'm like, you know, you got a pigeon in here, right? You know, a really fun goof would be like, invite some over your house for the first time. And there's like a parrot on a stand right. And then they're like, Oh, a parrot. And you react like, what? Oh, God, how did that get in here? It's because I can talk, right? That's it. That's because it's big, easy to spot. My concern about animal size can be plotted on a sort of bell curve to the peak of the bell curve is the likelihood with which I could spin kick the animal. So like, there's if it's very small, if it's a mouse or pigeon, which is a mouse that flies,

that I could would have a very hard time spin kicking. If it gets larger than that to like medium range, like a parrot, absolutely, absolutely one flying spin kick, I could take that down. If it gets bigger than that, a very, very like a bear, right? I couldn't spin kick it all day long. Yes. It's not going to have the desire to. So the real on the X axis is ability to spin kick. And on the Y axis is impact of me. Well, yeah. And there's a Z axis of need to spin kick because I want to make it clear. I'm assuming Justin's talking about self defense here and not that he is some sort of small game, the smallest game hunter who goes around with an insatiable desire to spin kick God's creations. The New Siebel is a monster hunter. Justin spin kicks a bunch of birds.

I need to know I could defend my family from the animal. Yes. Via spin kick, if need be. Now, because there is also a number of like one parrot, the 100 pigeons, you know what I mean? Like, we could get into some tippy headwind shit. I'm just like, I don't mind a dove. That is a thousand doves. That's how birds ends to be hundred does the six street fighter spin kick gets like 20 doves at a time in that kick. I want to make it another point here. I feel like there would be sort of a mounting resentment for a dove used in a magic trick because there really is not much career advancement you could seek beyond that as a dove aside from John Woo movie use. Yes. And that is a very small or like even the job pool for this one very competitive is

sign of a miracle from God. And that's that's that's that's a I don't even know where you apply like you can't get a zip recruiter is great but I don't think you can get on zip recruiter, a duck bird zip recruiter and say like great dove, beautiful wings, beautiful lustrous beak looking to be used as in to show people that it's going to stop raining real soon from God. Trav, can I check in with you real quick and see how much energy you expended trying to come up with a punny name for a bird related recruiter? Oh, a lot Justin. Thank you for asking. I was sitting here in silence trying to do it. That's exactly what was going on. Thank you for asking. Do you have any failed failed things that you just want to like throw out there?

In the last 30 seconds has has the word bird recruiter crossed your mind? No, it was more like tweet recruiter. I was trying to do it like bird sounds, cheap recruit, you know, like something in there. And I just honestly just wasn't getting there. It just wasn't. I didn't even have any false starts. The engine wasn't even turning over because I was simultaneously trying to come up with a punny name for it and also thinking, man, I hope that there's not like a whole like magicians are bad to doves kind of thing. Um, let me just say let's like let's lay that on the table and yell at it. It's not a nice thing to do. One of my cool metrics is what I do it to a human child because I don't think that I would

do that to a human child. I put it in my sleeve and and then throw it out into an audience. Yeah, when you put it like that. Okay, it is an uncool thing. You're right. It's an it's inhumane and I think we can put put put this to bed. Doves do not like being used for magic tricks. And so I would like to present to you the magic trick of the future. You see me, I've got a white cloth and I say keep an eye on this cloth, folks. You're gonna love what happens next. And then I tuck it into my sleeve or whatever magicians do. And then I pull out a drone and then I just kind of fly the drone around the audience for a little bit for like 10 minutes. And that's going to get up a lot of magic showtime. I actually think that that would that is far more

impressive than a duck. Okay, cool. It's a small drone. I'm not talking about like one of those big ones they use for movies and shit. I'm not talking about one of those Avatar two drones. I'm talking about a little one you stocking stuff or drone. Here's it. Okay, here's the movie. All right, here's. Mm, here's a cool magic trick. No, go ahead and save the movie, Trav. Okay, chase that instinct, but there's no reason to shy away from it. Okay, here's the magic movie about doves. So the dove, it's all about it's kind of a John Henry kind of thing where now there's a mechanical dove being brought in who does the zone magic tricks. And the dove has to outperform the drone. But also, sorry, the dove, the dove is the magician. Because this can be great if

if a magician pulls a dove out and the dove's like, Oh, yeah. And the dove lifts up its wing and produces like a bee. Yeah. Yeah. And then the plankton or something like that is like, what's up? And then the plankton lifts up and what's that as the blue whale, and it just starts all over again. That's where the circle life is from Lion King. How about another question? Yeah, I'd love that. Don't put doves in your armpits. I actually I'm looking over these questions and realizing the first three are all about food. And then I just remembered I didn't eat breakfast. So they might all be connected. Anyways, next question. While leaving our apartment today, my boyfriend and I found a torn open unmarked cardboard box full of 10 boxes of tag along

Girl Scout cookies in our lawn. It was rained on. But none of the cookie boxes are damaged. There is a receipt with the attended address in it. But the address is half a mile away. The address also belongs to the house that I lived next to last year. And they were terrible neighbors. God, can we keep these? Are they ours now? Or will we end up in some horrible cookie hell? That's from taking tag alongs in Muncie. Now, I don't know if this is going to be important for the show itself. But tag alongs are the ones that are like a cookie with peanut butter on top and then covered in chocolate. Yeah. Oh, shit. I love those. But sure, of course, that's that specific cookie. There's two questions here. One, okay, are you going to eat these

cookies? And they didn't even mention this. Are we going to eat these rained on outside cookies? I don't know how to begin unpacking that. I don't know how to begin to take them out of the box. No, I know how eating cookies works, Travis. I'm very good at it. The other question is return returning them because here's my theory. The girl scout in this family of the neighbors you lived next year next to last year who were terrible is on that grift grind so hard. Yeah, just went out, sold the whole freaking box. It was amazing. Sold the whole freaking box. Don't even worry about it. So I'm going to get my points that I need for the trip to Disneyland because the box now this grift has not been thought through very well because I mean,

no, yes, what like $40 that they unless they stole maybe they, you know, stole $40 or they went up to somebody said, Hey, can I just have $40? And they said yes. And they said good. And then they threw the box they were carrying as hard and as far away as they possibly could. I actually did a similar thing when I was a child. This is another Travis anecdote. Is this band candy? Yeah, it was band candy. And I ate I think all the bars and then like, it came time to turn in the money or the unsold bars and I had to go to mom and dad and be like, Hey, I need $30 because I just ate all of those. Yeah, yeah, the words candy fraud. And they did it and they were not they were not pleased with me for so many reasons. I think you have to take the cookies to them and

drop them on their poor. It's an angel test. The problem is the problem is that you don't know there's two things you don't know one have the people moved and maybe there's very nice new people there who spent the last $50 they had buying 10 boxes of tag along cookies. Are they bad with money? Of course they are. That's how they got down to just $50 left. And bad with cookies, it sounds like because they just laying on their lawn somewhere. Yeah, bad with cookies. But if you don't take the cookies as person, you're setting up a world where this person is going to be mercilessly hounding a girl scout asking about their cookies. And that's not very nice. Like that's not a good reality for that poor girl to have to endure. Not only that, but I look at this

and I think about all the factors here, right? 10 boxes, right? 10 boxes and it appears to be rained on, but no damage to the boxes. And it just so happens to be the address of a house you live next to. And you know they're bad people, but you also know that these cookies belong. This is a test of some sort. I've been watching a lot of good place. And I truly believe that this is some sort of ethical because to have all those factors of like all those factors, it's just far enough away that you have to drive there, but not so far that like you don't know where it is. You know the people who live there. Somebody's watching you. Yeah, you're being watched. If there is a van parked across the street from your place and the windows are blacked out, I can give you

basically a 100% griffin macro guarantee that Junkie Yonez is in there somewhere. Because he's run out of ideas pretty much completely based on how many times we reference him in our podcast about situations like this. Here's the problem. And this is where my dilemma is. This is a good thing to do, right? Taking the cookies back. That is a good thing. And by the way, I recognize the whole time that we've been talking about this question. You have been at home, chocolate all over your mouth. Oh, no. But it's a good thing to do. Or alternatively, you've just left a wet cookie crate in your home somewhere, which is also very unappealing. It's a good thing to do, right? Taking these cookies back. Categorically. Unless this is a

grift. And you are going to be putting this Girl Scout on blast. And you cannot just turn on a fellow grifter like this. Yeah, that's true. It's really rough. Maybe you could talk to the Girl Scout about maybe cutting you in on the grift. Now, there's an idea. An unaddressed envelope, you just drop it off at their front door as an envelope with one tag along in it as like a one. Maybe wrapped in a napkin. I know the grift. I need a taste. I've run this one so many times. I need I need into your grift. And maybe you could actually help with the grift. Like you could just be like, Hi, I'm looking for a tag. I want tag along so much. If you've got some coming, I'll pay you twice. If you just give me half of it now, half of the money now, I can give you

twice as many tag alongs later. Yeah, the parents might answer the door though. And you have to be like, Hello, your daughter sold me a box of tag along cookies. And because you got to get to her right to like set up the set up the grift. And so you're like, And I don't know how to eat them. So I was hoping to get a little bit more additional details from your little salesperson. And I need I I'm in the grip because you I wanted to discuss wine pairings. I thought maybe some she would have some suggestions. Oh, you're going to prison. Actually, if you do mine, you're going to prison. So don't do mine. Mine is seems like a bad idea. Um, no, oh, this is it. This is I figured out the grift figure out the graph. What's the graph?

Okay. The person orders the boxes from the Girl Scout. Girl Scout orders them, right? They then say the box never made it to me. Then another box of 10 tag longs gets sent. Then that person pays for it. Then the Girl Scout goes back, collects the 10 boxes, resells those by the bang, by the boom rolling in money. So wait, you think that the the Girl Scout is in some sort of shipping fulfillment business where she is handling bulk orders and something went wrong somewhere in the logistical side. And she's counting on you. That's why the address is so close to you. Counting on you returning the box once the second batch has been ordered. And then that doubles up profits. It's a profit game. I don't understand why the Girl Scout has to

use somebody's yard as a bed drop for this for this grift. It seems like she could just keep it somewhere in her home. Now they come and check that shit. Okay. The Girl Scouts are very thorough. Very thorough. I think you should return these cookies or one other thing you could do, PO box 54. No. Don't make us complicit in the sin. No, don't make us complicit in the sin. Also, I don't like tag longs that much. What? You scoop out the peanut butter with your teeth, you eat that junk, and then you eat the whole cookie. What's not to love? So there is a way to eat tag longs. Yes, there is. There is a correct way, yes. Okay. So maybe the scam is better. You can say that to the parents like, I need help eating these things and like, what the

fuck are you talking about? And then you take it and first you press it up into your cheek and you're like, oh, nope, missed again. Then you take just like a little bit of a nibble. You're going to watch me do this whole thing. Is the nose involved? Please help. How much do she stuff should I be doing? Does she have WhatsApp? I'll just, I can just hit her up there. That would be fine. Listen, if we're going to buy a bunch of Girl Scouts cookies around, I don't know if the season is on or not. I'm assuming if it is. Oh, it's on like Donkey Kong, my friend. Is it on? Okay. Oh, well, we're going to need to do the money zone. So let's go. Our first sponsor this week is Casper. You like to sleep? Coward. Whoa, huh? Wow.

No sleep is good. They want sleep to happen in this act. Oh, they want sleep. Okay, they want, oh, good. Okay. See, you know what? I should read to the end. Sleep is good. Yeah. Which is something that Casper, a sleep brand that continues to revolutionize its line of products to create an exceptionally comfortable sleep experience one night at a time, thinks as well. They offer affordable prices because Casper cuts out the middleman. And you know, what is the middleman doing to your mattress? A lot of people don't know, like, are they getting a sleep in on it? Are they maybe trying it out before you get to it? You don't have to worry about that with Casper. Is your middleman, Tom Brady, wearing a big fake moustache? Because

I'll tell you, it's going to do your mattress. Casper real mattresses combine multiple supportive, never fucked femurimomes. Femurimomes. Hold on. They combine multiple, I misread. I'm sorry, I misread. Multiple supportive. No, it says femurimomes here. That's on Casper. Never fucked femurimomes for a quality sleep surface that has the right amount of both sink and bounce. We will not be paid for this advertisement. That's fine. I get it. Kira, Max Fun, go ahead and email us when you want to set up the Make Good for this app, which we will not be compensated for. You can be sure of your purchase with Casper's 100 night risk-free sleep on it trial. Get $50 towards selected mattresses by visiting casper.com

slash mybrother and using promo code mybrother at checkout. Terms and conditions apply. I have a really serious question. We had a lot of fun there, but this question, I think we need to give it the weight that it deserves because it's heavy. Do you guys think that Tom Brady marries each mattress before he has sex with them? Yes. I want to tell you about Pro Flowers. I got a beautiful little bouquet of roses sent to me by Pro Flowers last week. They are so lovely. It is so exciting. We've gotten Pro Flowers in like this a few times. It's so nice. I never really think about getting flowers in the house. I'm not much of a plant guy, but it's really nice to just have a beautiful little vase of flowers just sitting in your house and making everything look

good and smell good. Pro Flowers sets you up like that. They'll send you a bouquet. They'll send you the vase you need. They'll send you the food that you need to keep the flowers fresh. It's really great. An exclusive Valentine's Day bouquet from Pro Flowers is a perfect way to make a big impression. Pro Flowers thought inside the box, so you can too. Their flowers are boxed fresh and delivered fast, so they'll last surprisingly longer. Seven days at least. You just choose a delivery date and it's guaranteed making you look good. Right now, our listeners can send a bouquet to their Valentine or whoever and save 20% off of their purchase of $29 or more. Hurry in order today. Valentine's Day is next week to get 20% off your purchase. What? Yeah, I know. To get 20% off

your purchase of $29 or more, go to proflowers.com today and use the promo code, mybrother, in the special codes box at checkout. That's proflowers.com and the code, mybrother. And that's the end of the ad, Pro Flowers, so you can stop listening right there. One fun thing is that Pro Flowers is sponsoring three of our podcasts, so I got three boxes of Pro Flowers sent to my house on the same day. Hell yeah. So now it kind of looks like in my house, it kind of looks like I'm trying to hide the scent of a corpse I buried underneath my floorboards because I have three vases of flowers on my dining table. No, that is a good question. How would you cover up the smell of the corpse under your floorboards? Because for me, it would be for breeze.

I would turn to, with these prices, I don't think you could afford not to use Pro Flowers. Fourteen Nights of Ahriman is an asymmetrical two-player unit and resource management card game. One player leads the defense of a medieval city while the other controls a reawakening ancient evil. Each player will take turns building their economy and recruiting powerful units for the ongoing war. Both players recruit from the same five decks, but a high priest in service to the city behaves quite differently than a cult leader pledged to the dark. You visit ATZGame.com or Find a Month Kickstarter to see more. That sounds awesome. Yeah, that sounds extremely cool. I want to get that now.

And that's made ATOZGame.com, ATZGame.com. I'm just looking at this website. This is a nice little website. This is a nice little website. This game looks dope as hell. Just going to go grab this one real quick. Just can't get this. While you guys do that, I'll read the next one. This is for, and these are all exclamation points, so I will try to read it with appropriate... Please don't yell. Please don't yell. I'm not going to yell. I'm not going to yell. I'm just saying I edit the show, and so if you yell, it's a lot of work. I'm not going to yell. I'm going to try to say it with excitement. Elena, Ash, Chris, Mike, Riley, Cheryl, Erica, Patrick, Meredith. Now, it is just

Sherry. I think you read the exclamation point. Damn it. L there. No, that's fine because there's a free one there because Sherry, you are included in this one. And Cheryl, just go make a friend named Sherry, Cheryl, and that's more free money zone for you. And this is from Turbles, to my beloved Vortex pals. If all has gone according to plan, you now have a recording of a macaroy exclaiming your name you can use as a ringtone. Yes, I threw one in for myself. My name is Sherry. You're all amazing people and good, good friends. Thank you for being horny for this one, even in the darkest of times. Love you always, Turbo. And that's so important that we find the ability, even in the darkest hour, to still maintain a level of hornyness.

Like that's, it's still, because sometimes you're like, oh no, everything seems so down and so bleak. And not horny, but still not horny at all. I'm so horny for this, you know, like it's so important. I have a message here for Clara, and that's from Savannah, who says, to the best wolf mom around, happy 21st. From your in town ensemble to company wives, every show with you is a joy. Can't wait for you to save the oceans. I love you to shrimp heaven and back. So does all of hoof and horn, which is why they pitched in for this jumbotron. Love Julia, Wes, Karen, Maddie, Libby, Shayna, Adam, Cole, Booty, and Savannah. One of those names is not like the other. And it's, it's Karen. I love when we get a jumbotron that makes me go,

what I want to know about these people. Yeah, I want to know all about this. These sound like great people. Are they all in the piss musical? I don't know. Are they in the piss musical? What is hoof and horn? Is it like skull and bones? Buffer, you know, Buffalo, Buffalo, Buffer, Buffaloes. Is this a message for like nine Buffaloes? So what's the story here? You know, do Buffaloes like being used in magic acts? Absolutely. They love it. Yeah, Mark. Hey, buddy. Oh, hey, what's up, man? So I'm at this mafia restaurant. What? I'm going to go in and ask these guys what they think the best pasta shape is. Mark, they're probably eating it. I have a hunch that it's probably ravioli, but I mean, you know what,

that's a good idea. Whatever they're eating, I'll just take a look in their bowls and see what they have. Maybe there's supposed to be a big meeting there today. Can you see it from the street? That sounds really dangerous. I'm just going to go inside and ask. Don't, don't bother them. They're probably eating, you know, I'm not threatened by them. How about we tell them what the best pasta is on our podcast? We got this with Mark and Hal. Oh, that's a great idea. Hey, God. Tuesdays at nine on maximumfun.org. Here comes the hot and ready. I who for you just picked it up. God, but I was, I was really excited. I want a month. I want to month. Are you trying not to wake somebody up because it was a very

reserved. No, I'm just getting over a little bit of a bug. Welcome to Munch Squad. It's a podcast within a podcast. I do want to get, there's an elephant in the room. The elephant is shaped like nachos at Olive Garden. Yes, I know. There are nachos at Olive Garden. Oh my God, Justin. What's wrong, Griff? This is the worst. This is the worst. This is so much worse than Taco Bell doing fries. This is so much worse than that. But that's not what the episode is about today. I just want to mention, I know that, but they don't have the fucking guts. They don't have, they don't have the guts to make a press release about their loaded pasta chips, which are chips made of pasta with stuff dumped on them. They don't have the guts to do press release for it.

This is just, this is just pasta they ruined, and now they're trying to find a way to get it out. It's extremely al dente. It's, it's extremely al dente. It's Alfred dente. Cherry peppers in an Alfredo drizzle. Oh my God. It's chilling, but they don't have the guts to press release. So I can't do. Yeah, you have to send me a press release, folks. That's the only way this segment works. And I do have one here from Einstein Bros. There are the bros that make bagels and they introduce breakfast themed alarm tones. So Einstein Brothers, a place that sells his bagels, announced the launch of wake up tones for limited edition downloadable alarm tones that mimic morning breakfast essentials to help people wake up on the right side of the bed

in time for the most important meal of the day, breakfast. Now, if you visit Einstein bros.com slash wake up, you can download the free mp3 alarm direct direct your mouth fights and you get a coupon for an egg sandwich. Now here's the thing. So the consumer that this program is for is the consumer that is like, I really need the sound of bacon sizzling or coffee brewing to use as a very, I would assume ineffective alarm, but I just don't know where to get the glossy mp3 file to upload. So what they're supposing here is that I'm going to go to I'm going to type in the web address Einstein bros.com slash wake up. I want to pick from bacon, coffee, a rooster crowing or eggs frying. I'm going to pick one of those mp3s to download. Yeah. Now only one of those seems to

me to be of alarm sound quality. I've never heard eggs frying and covered my ears and thought, oh God, no, it's so loud. The ineffectiveness, I think is what we're getting at there. I don't see how that would work very well. So this is a fun thing we can do because this is an audio program. Let's just play eggs frying right now just so we can have a conversation about it. Rise and shine, sizzling bacon, fresh cracked eggs and warm delicious bagels aren't going to eat themselves. Go ahead, get up, let Einstein Brothers Bagels handle breakfast so you can handle your day. So there's a few problems here with eggs frying. The first is that the sound that starts off is quiet, not loud enough to wake you up. If it does wake you up, it also kind of sounds like the sound

of, I don't know, drywall being a blaze, which is maybe not them like, oh God, oh God, oh God, smash through the window every time your phone goes off because you think that, you know, a fire has taken the house. That's a challenge. The other challenge is the, I'm sorry, stranger who has wandered into your bedtime routine to yell at you about this bagel store. These eggs aren't going to eat themselves is maybe the weirdest phrase to use to wake someone up. And you know, if you're going to go that far to have a voice in it, why not just make that, like, here's somebody telling you to get the fuck up. Like, that seems to me a more, this is not an eggs frying alarm clock. This is a human voice saying, hey, go eat some eggs.

At Einstein Brothers, can we just, can we just before, can we just sample coffee brewing? Yeah, I wanted to talk about coffee brewing also because there's a sound and it sounds a little like something else. And let's go ahead and tune in. Good morning. Time to conquer another day. Stop by Einstein Brothers bagels for an incredible breakfast and cup of coffee to set your day up for success. You got this. Good morning. It's time to take a piss. It's definitely, I'm definitely already pissing. And guess what, pal? You are too right now because this is the sound you chose to woke up to today. Every so often in Munch Squad, I, like, Justin will talk about a food and I will think who will want that. And then I think

somebody, there's somebody who is experiencing some kind of food challenge. I myself just recently on Trends Like These, we were talking about a bagel place that for the Super Bowl was making a pretzel, excuse me, a big game. Tony was making a pretzel bagel with mint chocolate chips spread on it. Hell yeah. That sounds really good. And here's the thing about this. I don't only wonder who would want these, but also, like, the amount of work you would have to go to to actually put these onto your phone. It would be tremendous. It would be tremendous. Hey, listen, if you're a higher rank member of the Schmeer Society, which is actually a thing that they call their their fans, I guess, uh, it doesn't, you want this. You want these strangers to be the first voice that you

hear in the morning. You want the sound of this hot troubled piss to be the first thing that you hear in the morning because you hear that hot troubled piss and you think Einstein Brothers sounds pretty good right about now. You also, if the alarm, what if you were married and you, I think that's fair grounds for divorce is like every morning, my husband, Jeffrey, who I love very much wakes up to a pistol arm and then a man yells. Let me just say, let me just say, also, if you're the sort of person that would download an Einstein Brothers ringtone to service your alarm, you do not need a reminder to go to Einstein Brothers. I have to imagine that is your first fucking thought every day when you wake up is I have got to get to Einstein Brothers right away.

Now, I think we have an opportunity here, though, because they clearly missed the point here. Einstein Brothers did, but I mean, I think there's a lot of opportunity here and maybe we could just knock out a few wake up alarms for them. I have some coffee right here, so I could go like, hot damn, get your ass to Einstein's partner. That'll wake people up. I feel like the sound is bad, doesn't sound like piss, and then the voice is just more of a command. That'll get your pants on. Let me see what Foley stuff I have around here. Let me try this. A lot of paperwork at the office you got to do. You can barely wake up, just stop outside. Try that again, but yell it like louder, because it's not going to get long.

Try to make the paperwork sound less like farting. Yeah, it sounds a lot like a big toot. Okay. That paperwork isn't going to complete itself. Louder. Get louder at the end. Start off kind of quiet, but then get louder. Okay. That paperwork isn't going to do itself. Time to get some brothers. Bagels, coffee, they're not picky. You can have whatever you want. At Einstein Brothers Bagels, or other places that have bagels, I'm not getting a cut. My name is Eureka Inglacius, and I recorded this voicemail just for you. Perfect. Was it a voicemail? It was a voicemail. Also leave a message at the sound of the bacon.

If you are not a coward, you will download these and make them your voicemail message. I was calling to talk to a human being, but certainly I couldn't have reached that, considering your voicemail message. Jesus. All right, let me try another one. Oh yeah, try this one more. Bacon, bacon, bacon, bacon, bacon, bacon, bacon, bacon, bacon, bacon, Kevin Bacon. You've reached Kevin Bacon's phone. Leave him the message at the numbers, at the, leave a message. If you know Kevin Bacon, you can get that to him. So here's the IEU. This one was sent in by Level9000. We've done one similar to this before, but this one has some exciting sort of options for us. The IEU answers user

rrrrr. Orange Glow Ahoy asks, I need a catchphrase. Help. Here they is. One, I like a do what? Two, oyster burger piluza. Three, hack it, why don't you? Yeah. End of options. So, can I just think? We have a lot of great stuff here in the writer's room and I figure we could just kind of weigh them because obviously it's gotta be one of these three.

I feel like this is the new sort of like personality test of what kind of person you are. Like hack it, why don't you just wanna leave the party a little bit earlier than everybody else because they need to go home and recuperate to some of their energy. Here's my question. And I'm really trying to rack my brain

for a catchphrase from a popular media thing that I mean, maybe got me cheese, a question. I'm looking for a question catchphrase. What was the other catchphrase, I was trying to remember this last night because I was showing my daughter some Urkel clips on YouTube, what was the catchphrase that you identified that we didn't recognize?

Not while I'm pouring. Not while I'm pouring. Yeah, that was a great, I forget, I wanna watch that clip now. He had a lot of them. Yeah, it was almost like Merkel was purely written to just have catchphrases. It's weird, yeah.

I like a do what? I like a do what, it's so good. Let's circle back to I like a do what. Okay. Because I think it has the most promise. Oyster burger or peluza, the use case for that one is gonna be quite limited, I worry. Well, also it's got a lot of hard syllables in it.

Like it doesn't exactly drip from the tongue. It's hard to say. It takes a long time to say it too. People are gonna be tuning out in the middle of the catchphrase. Also, it's straight up dookie nonsense. And the other two are, yes, also that, but they at least form semi-coherent thoughts. Now I actually see a lot of promise for hack it,

why don't ya? Cause that seems like a good thing. Like if somebody's complaining like, oh, I can't get my iPhone to like connect to them. Well, hack it, why don't ya? Because in this day and age, if people try to figure out, you know, constant life hacks, 10 C.

Yeah, 10 things you didn't know your iPhone could do. That kind of like you too. You just like, this guy hack it, why don't ya? And it could both be used to encourage someone to figure out how to use their device properly. But also it's kind of a snarky like, oh, why, why don't you just tell me about some life hacks? Just hack it, why don't ya?

I think it means like hack it, like. Yeah, that's how I read it. Like, oh, he just can't hack it. Oh, buddy hack it, why don't ya? But I do think Travis is right. And we're wrong. We're the wrong ones. Cause it could just be like, you know,

I'm having a lot of trouble getting big wins and player unknowns battlegrounds. It's like, well, get, I'll hack it, why don't ya? Get some, you know, look through walls, do some cheats on there. I get the appeal now of hack it, why don't ya? But can I just offer this up? I like I do what?

I like I do what? Here's what I like. It's so good. It's rare to find a catchphrase, as I said, that is a question. It's even rarer to find a catchphrase that is both a question and a response to something someone else has just said.

That is so specific that someone would be like, Travis, do you like crosswords? I like I do what? Crosswords. Yes. Yes, I do. Thank you for asking. Yes.

Thank you for reconfirming that. I got some good ones here, though, from Yahoo Answerers. Thank you, God. Thank you. I want to thank God and Jesus, just my heaven friends for this one. How much longer do we have on the Yahoo Answers, by the way?

Do we have a timetable? Because they definitely killed Instant Messenger. Yeah. I mean, they in the broad sense here. Kim Trails. Kim Trails, they killed it because they didn't have the guts. It can't have long, right? Probably not long.

So let's gather our delicious rose buds that we're going to eat like you do with rose buds. ProFlowers.com. ProFlowers, the tastiest rose buds. They're edible. Well, everything is, if you try hard enough. Yahoo Answers user question mark says, don't let your farts on a hayride.

And again, the use case for this one, narrow, it's more of a folksy idiom, I would say, less the catch phrases have to be broadly applicable. I mean, the fact that, shh, not why I'm pouring God as many uses as it did is kind of an anomaly. This user who's just an emoji, so I'm not going to try and pronounce that, says eat my shorts.

That's a good one, but the problem with that is that it was already used. Well, just take it and turn it. Don't eat my shorts. Hey, stop eating my shorts. Stop eating my shorts. Again, the use case? No, you could use it if somebody,

kind of like don't blow smoke up my ass. It would be like, if someone was like, hey, I really think you're doing a great job. I'm like, listen, man, I don't need it. Stop eating my shorts. I don't need anybody eating my shorts right now. Um, smiley, smiley says. Someone eating my shorts is the last thing I need, okay?

Don't eat my shorts and tell me it's a goat. Listen, people have been eating my shorts around here all morning. Just be straight with me, Doug. Is it a good presentation or not? Don't eat my shorts on this one. Hey, Valerie, we're all counting on you. Don't eat your shorts, okay?

Just don't eat your shorts. This is your moment to shine in here, okay? Don't eat your shorts. You're the anchor. This is your moment to shine in the big presentation. Don't eat your shorts. Go in there, you make them eat their shorts. 14 seconds on the clock in the fourth period

and Tom Brady just has wide open receivers and he really eats the shorts on this one, folks. A big, sticky mouthful of shorts for Thomas Brady. He's basically chewing the shorts at this point. Smiley says, winter, winter chicken dinner or when you go out with friends to eat, when the bill comes, tell them you got the tip. Always wear clean underwear

or look both ways when crossing the street. That's like a routine. It's like a catchphrase. And the best one here's from... Sports with a Z 55 said, where did you buy those clothes at the toilet store? It's a mean catchphrase, but I mean some catchphrases are transgressive.

Well, now guess what's interesting about this? I guess it could be considered a catchphrase, but it is also a joke from Anchorman in which someone is trying to make a joke in the movie and fails. Well, that's a good point. Can we just do more jokes from Anchorman on our fucking podcast without realizing it?

Has it been long enough now? I mean, shit, dude, I ate the shorts hard on that one. Oh, god. Damn it. Now that's making me wonder how many other things we ate the shorts on and said like an Anchorman thing throughout the last 392 episodes.

I mean, the jokes per minute in that film is a lot. And so it's kind of, you kind of used them all up, I think. Well, and also they use a lot of words in there, that if we said like, you know, coffee, and it's like, oh, they said coffee once in Anchorman, that was an Anchorman weapon. You said coffee a lot when you were talking about the Einstein Brothers stupid thing.

And I think we've said San Diego before, that's an Anchorman reference. Damn it. Na-nu-na-nu, that's a good one. That's a good catchphrase. That's a good one because it's, you can use it pretty much any time that you don't have something different to say.

I don't think so. It's a good one, but you have to say it like that. That's fine. Because if you say, I don't think so. That's not a catchphrase. I like to do what? I like to do what? I like to do what?

It does land. It does land. All right, let's end the episode. So that's the end of our show. Hey, I'm doing the voice of a guy named Barry Deadwood on a show called Slug Riot, and you can find that at vrv.co and search for Slug Riot. It's a fun animated series about a guy who makes

a mold core band, his sister tries to make him bring it back. It's fun, the episode is like three minutes long, go check it out, you'll like it. I destroyed my voice doing it. So please enjoy it. Make it worth it. Yeah, make it worth it. Also, that's where you can find my brother and me

to stream if you want to watch the episodes and own them for your very own. You can do so now via Google Play or on iTunes. You can get them there. And so thank you again to everybody who got that, and we take that to number one on the TV charts. We put up a commentary for episode two to thank everybody. So you can hear the three of us

and a director and showrunner, JD Amato. That's in the, in just our regular, my brother and my brother and me feed if you want to listen to the commentary and watch the episode at the same time. I also want to say, so I put together a secret society show here in Cincinnati. That's so secret anymore if you're talking about it.

Well, here's what it is. I mean, I tell you where it is, when it is, and how to get tickets, but the guests are a secret mystery. I can tell you right now, I have got six amazing guests that I'm... I know who they are, and it's pretty good. Yeah. You did a pretty good job.

And I'm also pretty excited to say it's already three quarters of the way sold out, and we're still about two months away from the show. So it has allowed us to go ahead and start planning for the show for April two. And so I'm hoping that this will become an every month thing. And it seems like people are into it. It's the Cincinnati Underground Society show.

If you want to get tickets, they're $15. And once we cover the expenses, 50% of profits are going to go towards next month's show. And the other 50%, I'm going to donate to a local Cincinnati charity. You can get tickets at bit.ly forward slash cussmarch. C-U-S-S-M-A-R-C-H, because it is the March show. And I'm also working, you might have seen

the great logo made by Justin Russo. And I'm also working on some like enamel pins and stuff for the show, and profits from that will also go to the charity. But yeah, if you want to get tickets, bit.ly slash cussmarch. The show is March 30th. And I hope to see you there. Also-

Real quick, can I tell us about the Jococruz? Yeah, so this is the last week to get your tickets for the, to get a booking on the Jococruz. Some of those performers include Amy Mann, Jonathan Colton, Gene Gray, Cameron Esposito and Rhea Butcher. Teresa and I are going to be there. Our dad is going to be there.

Full, Will Wheaton, Matt Fraction, all kinds of- Teresa's gonna be there? Yeah, all kinds of really cool people are gonna be there. And you can come hang out with us on this boat for a week and do some super fun shit. Just go to jococruz.com, J-O-C-O-Cruz.com. And you can come hang out. Real quick, we are doing a graphic novel

of the first arc of the Adventure Zone Balance called Here There Be Gerblins. And it's coming out this summer. And you can pre-order it right now at theadventuresoancomic.com. Also want to thank John Roderick in the Long Winters for the use of our theme song instead of partying off the album, Putting the Days to Bed.

It's a fantastic album that you should already have along with all the other Long Winters albums. And thanks to Maximum Fun for having us on the network. You can go to maximumfun.org and check out all the great free shows there. You're just gonna love all of them. And if you want to hear more stuff that we do or see the videos, stuff that we do at Polygon,

you can go to mackleroyshows.com. And do you guys want that final? Yes. Yeah, here it is, it's sent in by Leslie. Thank you, Leslie. See, I think it's her user. Sorry, something's going wrong. Let's just do a quick refresh of the data on the page.

Nope, something's still going wrong. So we'll just call him Kenny, asks. Encino Man. Fact or fiction? Ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha! Why, it was just a math. I'm Travis McRoy.

I'm Griffin McRoy. This is my brother, my brother, me. Kiss your dad's score on the lips. ["Snowman's Song"] Maximumfun.org. Comedy and culture. Artist owned. Listener supported.

I'm Allegra Ringo, and I'm Renee Colbert. And we host a podcast called Can I Pet Your Dog? Renee, can I tell you about a dog I met this week? I wish that you would. In turn, though, can I tell you about a dog hero? May I tell you about a dog breed in a segment I like to call a mutt minute? I would love that.

Could we maybe talk about some dog tech? Could we have some cool guests on, like Lin-Manuel Miranda, Nicole Byer, and Ann Wheaton? I mean, yeah, absolutely. I'm Ann. You're on board. What do you say we do all of this and put it into a podcast?

Yeah, okay. You think? All right. Should we call it, like, I don't know. Can I pet your dog? Sure. All right. What do you say we put it on every Tuesday

on Maximum Fun? Or on iTunes. Sounds good to me. Meeting's over.