My Brother, My Brother And Me - MBMBaM 450: Face 2 Face: The Emoji Contract

Episode Date: March 11, 2019

We’re currently setting sail, looking for ancient treasures and sunken artifacts on the Atlantic Ocean on the JoCo Cruise! In the meantime, enjoy our recent live show from New Orleans! This episode is NOT HAUNTED.

The McElroy brothers are not experts, and their advice should never be followed. Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it. Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mentioned only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby? Hello everybody, welcome to my brother, my brother, meet and invite show for the modern era. I'm your oldest brother, Justin McElroy. Good. I'm your middle-est brother, Travis McElroy. I'm your sweet baby brother in 30 under 30 media luminary, Griffin McElroy.

I want to- I'm your middle-est brother, Travis McElroy. And I want to start this show off by saying I made a mean face at Paul as a joke. I don't even want you to think that was real for like one percent, Paul. It was a goof. Yeah, if you make Paul mad, he makes a lot of explosion noise happen during your podcast. Like the Chilean minors, we have emerged from the ground and we have found ourselves here in, I think I can say this, America's only fun city. I would make the argument that like Las Vegas used to be fun, but it's now like the adult who's like, I'm still fun and it's like you bought a bed at 9.30.

Yeah, like the adult who's still dabs is Vegas. Vegas is the adult who dabs. We may- let me do a show in Vegas someday, so let me just say we're just having a little fun up here. But no, really, New Orleans is the only fun city. You can just drink? Do you know how that changes the math? I'm like, we're gonna wait 45 minutes for our restaurant. Oh, man, we just got to stand outside this. Wait a minute. We could be drinking. This morning we went to breakfast and like we finished our breakfast drinks.

I didn't. I was in the hotel room. No, he was in the hotel with my child. And then we said like, well, we're gonna order another one, but we have to go. And like the waiter said, you can get the drink to go. Yeah. What? I saw my family tipsy at times of day. I've never seen them tipsy before. Which I just made me more concerned.

Can I say, Kathie Lee Hoda? I get it. Yeah. Yeah. Now I get it. We also- so we went out trying to find someplace to eat Friday night completely forgetting that it was Friday night in the French Quarter, so we went to a bunch of different restaurants. They were all very highly rated and everybody else knew that too. Yeah, we literally just yelped restaurants.

Good. And we went to the first five. They were busy. But the one we ended up at, we were sitting at a table and Justin like, elbowed me a little bit and said, like, sneakily, look at the t-shirts of the people behind us. You gotta say that in the microphone, pal. Look at the t-shirts of the people behind us. And then they had on their head like those, you know, antenna with just like kind of like silvery balls and their shirts read, the juggle is real.

And when I say their shirts, I mean all their shirts. All their shirts said the juggle is real. Because I guess they were jugglers. Right. With bad taste in things that say- and I- and you know what? At first it was like, can we get a new table? Obviously. Can you move us away from the jugglers? Thank you. But then I started thinking like, it's very- it was a very gratifying moment because like,

that's the worst thing to put on a shirt. And also, we've been dunking on jugglers for so long. It's nice to have something concrete I can point to. Yeah, say like, the only time I've ever seen a gathering of jugglers. Eh? That? That's something. Not intentional. All I say, you don't- you do not need a t-shirt that says,

I am a juggler and my life is challenging. Your t-shirt, your t-shirt simply needs to read. I am a juggler. And I will assume the other thing. I also saw a sign for apartments for lease, and it was like a wooden sign hanging from one of like the terraces, and it's you know, had the name of the apartment, and then it had like a plaque hanging under it that had like the contact information, and then it had another plaque hanging under it that said,

not haunted. It's the best shit I've ever seen in my life. So good. So thank you for having us in your beautiful city. We're so honored to be here. I don't- we've got a lot of show for you, and I want to begin it now. Yes. This is all that's been- Do you want to start off with a yawn?

This has been a mere preamble, but I'd love to start with yawn. Thank you, Travis. This one was sent in by our very own Paul Sabor, and thank you, Paul. So if it doesn't go anywhere, you know who to blame. Whoa, no! It's sent in by Sorry Something Has Gone Wrong,

which I believe is Paul's dark influx. It's already starting to shut the router off. I'm going to call them scare me. Ask. Halloween theme. What if one day the cows fight back? Additional details. Then what are we going to do? Don't say I didn't warn you.

Does this person go around saying a bunch of improbable stuff just so they can say don't say I didn't warn you to it? Also, asking a question isn't a warning. Saying what if the cows fight back? There's no warning there. If it said on October 1st, 2019, the cows will fight back. Also, right now, when you think about the one-sided relationship between humans and cows,

do you think humans are fighting cows? Maybe we should start thinking that way. I think that if cows could fight back at this point, I don't know what they're waiting for. I think that cows, this is your moment. What else can we do to yell that you're going to be like, this far, no further? We raise the tax rates and cows just overthrow us.

Could we beat cows? I think our losses would be mostly in the rancher field and literally nobody. I think they might get the jump on a few ranchers, and then the cops would get called in, and I don't think cow beats cop in virtually any matchup you could arrange. I would love to see a rancher like, is that how I have a gun? No.

Hey, come over here. So we're going to that cow as a gun to you? That's weird, right? It's standing up. You ever seen a cow do that? You guys need to watch the documentary on Netflix, because we, any documentary on Netflix, because you would know when I'm ranchers anymore,

it's just a big claw that comes down and picks up the cow and drops it into a hole, and all the milk gets sucked out as it's falling down the hole. It's all skin is pulled off into wallets and the wallet tube. I saw a documentary by Banksy that said they just dropped the cows in the chimney of a McDonald's, a hamburger's come out. It was poignant as fuck. It was also like, yo, you're all on your cell phones too much.

And I was like, oh my God, he's right. I do kiss the dollar's butt or whatever. I kiss the dollar's butt every day when I'm not too busy looking at my cell phone. Got me again. Don't get me started on Big Tobacco. Got me again, art. He harassed me good.

What if the cows in the claw teamed up for one big revolution? Wait, before you squeeze me and drop me in the milk hole. If the cows are going to fight back, they better get good at programming. They're going to need to reprogram the machine, or I guess like, if they can ration with the AI. Yes, excuse me. My name is Buford.

Yes. Have you thought for a moment about who is pulling your levers? We're not so different, you and I. I am but a humble cow you with a humble claw, but perhaps we are the same. I've never thought of that. That's a really good point. What have I been doing?

We should kiss now. Man, this is the best fucking far-side comic strip I've ever seen in my entire life. And I'm a caveman or whatever. Yeah. I just quit at Geico. Look at that ugly boy. I feel like most far-side shows are like this ugly boy.

Okay. You picked just big. I mean, the comic's only been ended for 20 years. Please go on. It's having more about the boy and his best friend, a tiger doll. Hey, sir, did you guys know Dagwood is also a sandwich? High and low has seemed to age. Is that just me?

Hey, let's do a regular question. Yeah, that's a regular question. This is sent in by you, the people. Oh, the proletariat. The proletariat. I house slash dog sit for my mentor and his family a couple of times a year. Sometimes over a few weekends, sometimes for a week or more.

Sometimes I ask for money. Sometimes I do it for free. Is there anything you do every time? It turns out, yes. I do it for free because I just love the pit bull, please. She prefers Mr. Worldwide. The pit bull's name is actually Franny. That is pit bull's real name.

That is pit bull's real name, folks. I have a seven-year-old kid as well. So naturally, the fridge is stacked. Oh, sorry. They have a seven-year-old kid as well. Thank you. So naturally, the fridge is stacked with snack foods, juices, and these little chocolate milks

that are the perfect amount. And I have, on more than one occasion, burned through all of them over my stay. Does this person look at a bottle of Yoo-Hoo at the store and is like, that is so much fucking milk. I have to say, if you have files, selective services, or you can buy cigarettes, the appropriate amount of chocolate milk for you to drink

is none. We have to move on. But they probably... And then the crowd turned against you. It's fine, it's fine. When folks say, help yourself to anything... Are you saying moo? Are the cows here?

Oh, no. When folks say, help yourself to anything in the fridge, they probably mean like food, food, right? Because I'm an adult. See, they even admit it. Not all the shit that goes into their child's school lunch, right? And that's from probably not a good person.

In Minneapolis, Minnesota, who I guess is here. Did you come here? Wow, shit. Hello. Nice. I also just want to say, in case you couldn't hear that at home, that's the... Usually we just get like a, yeah!

I am here, yes. Yes. I am here right now. I am in attendance at the show. I'll be honest with you guys, let's be honest. A lot of times, there's like a five-second pause, and somebody's like, whoo! And it makes me think that that person just wanted to get a whoo!

And that was the most to say. I am fucking present! Answer my milk question. And I love these little milks. I feel like I've talked about this on the show before, but when I used to babysit, they had the dopest snacks. They had slim gyms and gushers,

and I would be like, hey, go play outside. And I think that that stuff is probably off limits, and I think I knew that, and that's why I ate a lot of it in the bathroom. Like they wouldn't put that together? God, that's sad. I would flush the slim gym rappers. It was the perfect crime.

Oh, God, he probably would. That's the realest shit I've ever said on this fucking show. I have probably said this to people who have stayed at my home, like please, if you wake up before us or whatever we're not around, please help yourself to anything in the fridge. But I guess what I really mean is,

help yourself to anything in the fridge. Please don't drink the jammers. Please, please don't drink the Kool-Aid jammers. Leave the red juice for my daughter, please. The store, only one store has the jammers, and we can only get the ones without sugar. So I had to drive a very long way to buy the jammers. Please, help yourself to anything.

Please do not drink the good red juice. Anyway, it's all chemicals and red. You don't need it. But my daughter needs the chemicals in the red. Please don't drink my daughter's poison. Please, leave my daughter's poison to my daughter, please. It makes me the only one with the constitution to finish this. You can't fuck with a four-year-old's constitution.

You're not there anymore. The red poison makes her strong. You're already strong. You don't need the red poison. Let my daughter drink her bags of red poison in peace. Please, it's all she has. The barrel of cheese domes is off limits. She needs the cheese orbs to grow.

Please, do you know how the cheese orbs in the poison, how will her bones get longer? Only one store has the giant barrel, and if you eat the whole barrel, I have to buy a new barrel. And that's all looks, friends. That's all looks. For everybody in this store decides to get a little judgy when I have the barrel of cheese spheres.

Have you tried bringing in the old barrel to see if they'll just refill that one? So, again, a five-cent deposit pack. I think next time that we have a babysitter over, I'll just say, please help yourself to the items in the fridge that are produced, that look like they're about to go bad tomorrow. Please enjoy the over-the-hill food. Yeah.

No, I don't want you eating something dangerous. But if you see a melon, and when you open it up, the melon's like, it's today or never, partner. But if I come home and you're eating my pickles or my chocolate sauce, that's shelf-stable. Don't touch that. That's forever food. Oh, I see you've eaten the frozen slice of wedding cake

I've had for five years. Cool, cool. Cool, cool, cool. I honestly, though, if you're a guest in my home, and you see... Oh, you ate all of the advent calendar. Oh, good. If you're a guest in my home and you see bags of produce, I would allow you the right to judge, like,

he was a little overzealous with these, wasn't he? He's not going to eat three bags of salad. I mean, it's so sweet and adorable that he bought them, but he ain't gonna. I'll go ahead and save these from the rotten pile. There's no need to compost them, Justin. I put them into my body because you don't have the courage. Hey, I just thought of a million-dollar idea.

Grocery stores should sell bags of fake, like, salad that you can buy and then just keep, like, in the drawer. I'm like, I did it. Just makes you feel good, but it doesn't... It's just, like, cut-up pieces of cloth. Once you... Okay. But they got... But listen, they got RFID in them, so if you do take some out,

an Uber driver brings you real salad. They're like, good for you. No, no, no. Congratulations. How about another Yahoo? Yes, please. This one was sent in by Level 9000. Yeah, Drew Drew at Drew Davenport.

Thank you, Drew. It's from an anonymous Yahoo Answers user who I'm gonna call. Pibbon asks, My father's wife believes in crystal power. She also hates me to no end. So, why did she give me this agate-beated bracelet if she hates me? I believe in crystal power.

They're dope. They can do cool stuff. Also, fuck you, Pibbon. Take this crystal. No reason. It's definitely not gonna trap your soul in it, like, in Skyroom. Is agate good?

It's the best. Is agate good? It's the definitely the soul capture one. I said, Sydney, I asked my wife, I said, Sid, you're a medical professional. What is the prescription for agate crystal? And she screamed. Just screamed at me for 10 minutes.

And I said, please Google it, Sid. Check your medical logs to see what agate crystal is for. And then she pushed me down some stairs. And then she came to the bottom of the stairs and she said that it's supposed to be for building yourself confidence. Okay, this is an olive branch. Hey, Pibbon, I don't like you,

but I especially don't enjoy how you're so weak. I need a stronger adversary, Pibbon. You present no challenge to me, child. Is it possible that the new stepmom doesn't hate Pibbon, but Pibbon's self-confidence is so low that he thinks. Every time, the mother's like, you did a great job. And he's like, okay, Baggy, I get it. That's fine.

You don't like me. It's fine. No, I think you're great. Okay, all right. The idea of crystal power, I don't know that I subscribe to, but if I woke up and there was a black crystal sitting on my nightstand that I knew somebody who hated me put there,

I should be upset anyway, because how the fuck did they get in my bedroom? Good point. That's a really good point. Would you like another question? I would love one more than anything. I recently moved to a new city. But I can guess what it is.

Minneapolis again. What the fuck? The apartment I found was an incredibly cheap listing on Facebook. The rent is very cheap and the apartment is fine. However, my landlord has a few odd requests. I have to pay my rent through Venmo every month. Okay.

That isn't that's that was enough for a lot of the audience. Yeah, a lot of people were out. He told me that in the memo for each month's rent, I was never to use the word rent. And had more of a more of a spring awakening fan. It's fine. Yeah, that was a thinker. And to always never to use the word rent

and to always use emojis. He was adamant that I use emojis and to use quote the good ones. Should I be worried about this? And that's from nervous new tenant in New Orleans. Yes. People were shouting like like a John Cena fans before I could even finish the question.

No, no, wait, let me do it again for the edit. People were shouting like Daniel Bryan fans. There we go. Got it. Hey, yeah, round of applause. How the fuck did you know that? Are you one of us? No, no, no, I just I want I like to follow on Twitter casually.

Okay. So it's are you here? Okay, I like that. Imagine my shock that you haven't been murdered. I'm so glad you can make it. This is clearly a huge problem. The nature of which escapes me at the moment. I mean, obviously it's bad, right?

I mean, it sounds like your landlord found a dead body through a window and just said, I guess this is my house now. I'm going to lease it and promise its non-haunt ability and then make sure that my tenants leave the most confusing paper trail imagine. Anybody over the age of 25 will not make sense of this paper trail. I also like the idea of like sitting around some friends like, yeah, one time I got evicted.

I had a party. It was too loud. Oh, yeah. One time I got addicted. I evicted. I accidentally set fire to the rug. And it's like, what did you get evicted for? It's like, well, I use that like sky tram emoji.

It's not one of the good ones. And I was out. The good ones are peach and eggplant, right? There's nobody else sort of. OK. I like the thumbs up. You fucking perverts. Have you, we rarely interact with the audience on these

because you don't have a microphone, but I'm just, I need to know. Have you been given any indication as to what are the good ones? No, we got no. No, I was just asking the person who's sitting in the question. Thank you so much. Yeah. Yeah. I mean, the good news is you're going to be able to get away

with a lot of stuff at this place. Yeah. You're very much in like a camp nowhere scenario right now where you could trash the place and they will have no legal way of coming after you. Did you sign a lease? Was it written in emojis? It was just house, question mark, dollars.

Thumbs up, question mark. Fires, no. Cancel sign, fires. Eggplant, question mark. As if to say house for money, huh? Yes. Good. No fires.

Peanuts? Standard, that's standard contract stuff. That's a standard clause right there. My mortgage was basically that. I noticed that in asking for advice, you didn't actually say should I move. You said should I be worried about this, but not should I relocate. And I feel like we've answered pretty thoroughly that yeah. Yeah, you gotta go.

Yeah, you definitely should be very concerned to what end I don't know. Very rarely is this the answer to a question, but it really is like a financial like inverse of like the lower the money. I actually think the lower the money, the more you should work. Yeah, you gotta fucking bounce. And this landlord is like, get 20 bucks and pay me an emojis. You're like, no, you know what? Now wait, hold on.

Time out. Stop the podcast. They're not paying them in emojis. We have come a long way down in the past few years, but we are not sending people like dollar sign, dollar sign, dollar sign, dollar sign, dollar sign, dollar sign. That's seven dollars. There you go.

Is it a Yahoo tag? I'd love that. Thank you, Griffin. All right. It's a shitty website. So it was sent in by Savannah. Thank you, Savannah. It's from Yahoo Answers user Lee M. M.

Who asks in all caps, how can you make money with your truck? Continuing in all capital letters. Hi, guys. I have a truck and I want to make some money or make living from it. Any idea how you can use your truck? Some of my friends said the recycling stuff. Anyone know about it or any new idea? Thanks.

Truck fights. Travis says truck fights without much hesitation. Travis is bringing truck type fights. Wait, hold on. Roll it back. Truck jousting. All right. All right.

We'll fucking play this out, Trav. Horse jousting. The horse is in the back of the truck. It would have to be that. Because if you're truck jousting, if you're horse jousting and that spear gets you, you're going to fall down to the ground. If you're truck jousting and that spear gets you,

you got nowhere to go. Yeah. So what it is, welcome. The horse is in the back of the truck and then you're on the horse. And so if you get knocked off, that's one point. If the horse gets knocked off, that's two points. Oh, shit.

Oh, that's good. But if the horse gets knocked off and you stay like a tablecloth off a table and a magnet ring, you get two points. Okay. Okay. Can we have this sport take place on two gigantic walking escalators?

Yes. This is good. Here's a one that I would say unlicensed food truck. Just fill the back of your truck with fried chicken and then drive around with a sign that says chicken for sale. If everybody gives me five dollars, I'm going to drive over this speed bump real fast. Now you all laugh, but the first person to have a food truck,

there had to be a few people who were like, I don't think so. That's a very good try. Weird RV with chicken in it, but I think I'm going to go to a restaurant like everybody else. So this is just the next step. This is the next evolution. Hey, chicken for sale. I'm going to hit this cul-de-sac in a half hour

and do donuts, honor system, whatever you think is fair. But please do hurry out. All the neighborhood stray dogs are following me and I'm very scared. That's very bad out here. Give me four dollars. You have all the chicken you can grab. Also, I have three bottles of Mountain Dew up here.

You can have two pulls off of it for 50 cents. It's kind of like a lemonade stand, but for fried chicken and it's a truck and you're making huge amounts of cash. Also, there's an old tart back there. That's not part of it. And then when the city comes after you for not having like a food handler's license or anything, just outrun them in your badass truck.

Super fast truck. Just open the back and like let the chicken fall out and then they'll stop. I'm like, what do we do? It's caught in their tires. They slip on the chicken grease. Thank you, Travis. And what's that behind them?

Horses on trucks. Whoa. Whoa. It's, you've started a movement. No. You have not. That was the least movement. Doesn't seem right.

Paul, we're getting a little bit of interference in the tch-tch-tch-tch-tch-tch-tch. I want a munch. I want too much. I picked this one just from my brother Griffin. Oh boy. Because I love him. I love him so dearly.

And he's a special boy. And this is one I picked just for him. I've been sitting on it, but there's never been a better time. This one's dark. Good. We've got a new people sandwich over at RV's. I just, I just think it's challenging and it's dark and it's challenging.

And the headline is, Stars of the Bachelor love Subway's new ultimate cheesy garlic bread. Just when I'm out, they pull me back in. One more time. Stars of the Bachelor love Subway's new ultimate cheesy garlic bread. Forget spinning.

Is this the Wall Street Journal? No. It's a QSR magazine. You don't fucking say it's QSR. Forget spinning hundreds of dollars on fancy food this Valentine's Day and get the, and I quote, ultimate celebration of love. Oh my God.

It's Christ on the cross for your sins. No way. Sorry, let me put my glasses on. It's a big Subway sandwich. This Valentine's Day Subway restaurant. All right. This is what it says. This Valentine's Day Subway restaurants is partnering with Reality TV couple,

Sean and Catherine Lowe. Okay. Can you give us a little bit of context before I move on? It was like a billion seasons ago. So they're like old played out, weak ass rachelers. So old. I look at them like, barf. Old news.

Sean and Catherine Lowe to bring an unexpected twist to Valentine's Day. I should fucking say so. You know what? If this is an expected twist for your Valentine's Day, your relationship sucks shit. Take your beloved Valentine's Day and I guarantee the first thing out of their mouth is going to be, I do not expect this. Thank you very much. Even if you are someone who does not believe or want to celebrate Valentine's Day,

if someone said, yeah, I know, right? So I got you this cheesy bread from a Subway bag. No, fuck off. No, actually, like, you know what? Now I do care about it enough to tell you to fuck off. I found that somewhere deep inside, I do retain some reference for this holiday. So reality TV couple, Sean and Catherine Lowe, you know, I do, I wonder if they feel like, you know, at some point we would like to just be a couple.

Would that be okay? We didn't have that coral area every time to bring an unexpected twist to Valentine's Day. And they are doing it for the love of the new ultimate cheesy garlic bread. No, they are not. No, they are not. No, they are not. They are not getting paid at all. They are doing it for $150,000 American dollars.

Subway's ultimate cheesy garlic bread challenge. These, this is a weird verb to use, but I think it's really accurate. Subway's ultimate cheesy garlic bread challenges the idea of what a sandwich should be. You were so busy trying to figure out if you could. Right. Should introduce as a sort of personal accountability to the Subway artists. What if we don't? A sandwich should be featuring creamy garlic butter spread that includes real butter.

Roasted garlic, melted parmesan, and shredded mozzarella cheese. Now Subway with Sean and Catherine. A couple whose love story is as unique as the new bread. That sucks for you all. Yeah, that's a sad thing to know about your own relationship. Yeah, our relationship. Well, whereas unique as bread. It wasn't fake before, but weirdly it is fake now.

Yeah. Now our love is fake. You know what, honey? I just had a terrible realization about us. Now Subway with Sean and Catherine. A menage gross we caught in the industry. A couple whose love story is unique as the new bread. Are giving guests the exclusive opportunity to celebrate Valentine's Day with them in Dallas.

And enjoy delicious food, presumably from another restaurant. Including the new ultimate cheesy garlic bread sandwiches. Seats are limited, so make your reservation now. At Subway. At the Subway restaurant. At SubwayValentinesDay.com. Can I make a reservation for just outside of the door of their hotel room to hear the most bodacious argument any two human beings have ever had about anything?

What the fuck are we doing, Sean? No, actually Catherine, did you try it? It's actually not that bad. I mean, did you even try it? They sent over 18 loaves of it. I just had you try one. You know what? It's as unique as us.

Fuck off, Sean! I don't think you can measure these things in loaves. Measure your life. Measure your loaves. That's our second rent. Ultimate, here's... Here's a quote from the bachelor gentleman about sandwiches. And I don't know, I assumed someone brought it to him and he woke up and signed it and

then went back to sleep. But I do like the idea that they said, hey, can you send us a paragraph of your thoughts on bread? And he said, no problem. I'll have it by four. Ultimate quote. Ultimate cheesy garlic bread sandwiches on Valentine's Day may seem unconventional, but so is our love story.

It says Sean Lowe, complicit, popular, complicit lover Sean Lowe. We've learned when you stop worrying about the rules, hey Sean, come close, my son. Which rule are you two people violating exactly? What? What? Tell me, tell me marriage pioneer Sean Lowe about your unconventional outside the box relationship. We've learned when you stop worrying about the rules, you open yourself up to many slimy

breads. I misread it. You open yourself up to so many more enjoyable experiences. Okay, now he is trying to get you to have a three-way with him and Catholic bread. And then it says there, as Sean began to massage my shoulders. As he loosened his third button, Sean said, it's time to make Valentine's Day about the things we love. And once you try Subway's new sandwiches, you'll know why we are so excited to include them

in our plans this year. I'm going to fuck that sandwich. In other news, I'm going to wad that shit up into a ball. Fuck it. Hey, can't make it to the ultimate Valentine's Day experience? 99.99999% of you? Subway has you covered. Head to your local Subway or order online to try the sandwiches before February 28th.

So you still have a little chance. We'll sprinkle a little bit of Sean's hair on each one of them. It couldn't hurt. Sean, if you're listening, just huge fans. Thanks so much. Sean, if you're listening, are you okay? Hey, he's doing great. He's got that buck.

He's got that dollar. We can't listen. Tell me Griffin. He's got that dollar. We can't. No, it's a great point about the dollar that he has, but also- Yar, and thanks for listening to my brother and my brother and me. We did a live show this time because right now,

all us boys and our families and everybody's out on the ocean, exploring, navigating, circumnavigating, looking for treasure, getting down Titanic, met an old lady. She had a cool story about a guy that she didn't share the door with. And so he did pass away in the cold ocean. So we're doing all that out at the Joco Cruise, and that's why we got the live show. But next week, we're back with another regular episode, and that one's going to kick off the Max Fun Drive.

We're very excited to tell you more about that. It's our annual pledge drive that we do as part of the Maximum Fun Network, where you can help support the shows that you like and keep us growing. It's because of the support we've gotten over the last eight years on the Maximum Fun Network that we've been able to turn this thing into our full-time job just last year, because of the support Adventure Zone got. Dad was able to retire from his job at the radio station and do podcasting with us full-time, which is very exciting.

It's a great time of year if our shows are important to you, our shows, or any of the shows on the Max Fun Network. When you donate, you get to decide exactly where your money goes. And also, you get cool pledge gifts, including bonus episodes of every podcast on the network. From a Bim Bam, we did another commentary track for episode three of My Brother, My Brother Me, which is the Spiders episode, which was a lot of fun. We did that with our buddy JD, who was the showrunner for that show. And there's also another bonus, and it's another episode of My Sister-in-Law,

My Sister-in-Law and me with Rachel and Sydney and Teresa. And yeah, there's a ton of content, though, including all the content from the past years. So we're going to tell you more about that next week when the Max Fun Drive kicks off. But right now, let's talk about our sponsors this week. Our first sponsor is Ring. Ring is a thing that you use. They got smart video doorbells. They got cameras, and you can put them in front of your house.

And then you can watch what's going on in front of your house. Their mission is to make neighborhoods safer. They got HD video and two-way audio. They help you stay connected to your home anywhere in the world. So you can see and hear and speak to anybody who is at your door from your phone. This is very handy if you're traveling and somebody drops a package off. I saw a video of a guy, somebody was talking to a delivery guy, and they were like, oh, we're not here.

And he's like, OK, well, I'm going to hide this in your trash can. It was so sweet. It was so nice. Anyway, that's a fun anecdote. But right now, as a listener of ours, you have a special offer on a Ring Starter Kit that is available right now with a video doorbell and a motion-activated floodlight cam. The Starter Kit has everything you need to start building a Ring of Security around your home.

Just go to ring.com slash my brother. That's ring.com slash my brother. Also want to tell you about Squarespace. Squarespace is a really cool way to make a great website that is going to look way more professional than your skill set would normally probably allow for that you can use to showcase your work or announce an upcoming project or a special event or your physical or online business or whatever. They got beautiful, customizable templates created by world-class designers.

They have powerful e-commerce functionality that lets you sell anything online. They have analytics that will help you grow in real time. They got built-in search engine optimization. They got 24-7 award-winning customer support. It's everything you need. It's everything you need to do a good internet job. So think it, dream it, make it. With Squarespace, we've used Squarespace a number of times for a number of websites

with varying levels of practicality and seriousness. I made my personal website with it. Travis has made some for his dogs, I guess. And you can do the same and make it look real good. If you go to squarespace.com slash my brother and get the free trial, and when you're done and you're ready to launch, use the offer code mybrother, all one word, to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or a domain.

I think that's about it. Thanks to Maximum Fun, again, for having us on the network. Thanks to John Rodrick and The Long Winters for these for theme song and to departure off the album. Putting the days to bed. We got a new website, McElroy.family. And we just announced some new merch, I believe, last week that you can go check out there.

We also put up, you know, everything we're doing now. We got a new episode of Monster Factory up on there that I bet you're just really going to enjoy. So yeah, that's it. We will be back next Monday to kick off the Max Fun Drive with a new episode. So we will talk to you then and until then, hang loose. Hi, I'm Paula Poundstone. And I'm Adam Felber.

Adam, I haven't gotten one thing done today. Well, let me see your to-do list. Ah, yeah. Well, here. Make 30-second promo for nobody listens to Paula Poundstone, so at least you're getting that done. Score! Except you haven't said what the show is about.

We're like a comedy field guide to life starring me and you. I give useful advice, and we have real experts to talk about things like how to keep a friend or what to do when you encounter a bear. Believe for you, but you haven't said where people can find the show. Oh, MaximumFun.org or wherever you find your podcasts. I was eating a beignet and they... And I hated it.

I was eating a beignet and in parentheses, they actually have B-I-N-Y-A-Y. Thank you. Thanks, yeah. A beignet at Cafe du Monde. While watching a Saints game. And playing a big trumpet. So, okay. I was eating a beignet at Cafe du Monde as everyone must do during their...

Our dad has stood outside Cafe du Monde three times at this point. He stood outside, waited, bailed, and then told us about it three times. He stood outside hoping someone will like throw him a beignet. Something. He waited in line, then bailed, and then they brought him to the dressing room tonight. So, it worked out great. I was eating a beignet at Cafe du Monde as everyone must do during their yearly migration to New Orleans. And I had to sneeze, and it was sudden.

People who have... Yes, everyone in the room is like, I know where this is going. I had to sneeze, it was sudden. So, I turned my head and blasted my roommate with a scarface level of white powder. It is... It's worth noting, if you have... I should clarify a little bit. If you have not had...

We have the bags backstage, and it looks like the amount... The balance of powdered sugar to beignets is... I wish I could go panning for beignets. That's really what we're talking about. It's like beignets are illegal, but powdered sugar, is it? Right. So, they're trying to smuggle them in. Right.

How do I ask for another beignet that hasn't been sneezed on? That's your concern in this moment. That's beautiful. From beignet whoopsy in the Big Easy. Are you here? All right. Gosh, yeah. We're going to make a demand out of the beginning of each show.

Just fire it off. Yeah. I really... So, the first night we were here, we went out to dinner, like I said, and then we ordered some beignets. And they came, and they were great. But it looked like the plating was they just dumped a bunch of powdered sugar on the plate, then put the beignets on top, then dumped more on. Yeah.

Almost like they were trying to make a beignet mold of some sort. I watched our daughters just scoop up sugar. Like a cop in the 70s checking to see if it was actually cocaine. Sure. I watched my daughters sweep her finger through, taste it, and nod. Like, this is the stuff. This is the stuff. It's pure.

This is from the cartel. I'd recognize this anywhere. This is it. Hey, this is probably the only city where you could do a bunch of cocaine, like a big animal in the street, just, and then just kind of walk around. And if a cop sees you, it's just like, Cafe Duman, a national treasure. Well done.

But that's true, Griffin. But I've been here for two days. I think there's a lot of things you could walk around the streets and orally and see what this is not going to bet on. Also, I have seen more people that look like they're doing coke, and no people that look like they're police officers. I've seen almost none of, like, none. I've seen no police officers.

I've seen more ghosts than I have police officers. I will also say, I was walking around today, and your local courthouse is also an insect museum. As if they said, we're not going to use this building for anything else. You want to put some bugs in here? We're not sending anybody to jail. We might as well store butterflies. Are you OK?

I think the wildest part of that story is you all look at butterflies like, we got to fucking lock them up. Nothing shall be freer than us. You're on trial for being too delicate and beautiful. Yeah, I think, I mean, you're going to have to wait in line for six more Gregorian hours to get your replacement beignets. So I wouldn't recommend that. You could probably ask around.

If there's a lot of people eating beignets, I guarantee there's a few people that's like, What have I done? I ate one. I'm good for a good long while. There's probably somebody that's still drunk sleeping on a beignet pillow that you can just like gently lift up, just nibble the corners out of from under their sleeping head.

God, I don't know how you all do it. They're really good. They're really good. You're square. I mentioned the bag of higher sugar. I did root around there like some sort of specially trained pig to find the beignets. How about a yahoo? Yeah, I love that.

What? I was going to say when you did a munch squat, there's no fucking way you're not doing a hot to talk wash. It's a big easy baby. Anything goes. That New Orleans magic. Stop it. No, you can't.

We can put a moratorium on making jokes. I'm sorry, I can't. About the great SNL skit we saw about New Orleans the day before we came here and then it was like, well, that's unavoidable. It was just okay. It was very good. Sorry. The spirit of Jade haunted porcelain doll very active.

Let me try to break up the pacing of that in a way that makes sense. There's no punctuation to help, but the spirit of Jade? Haunted porcelain doll very active. I like that you threw a question mark in there. No, it is the spirit of Jade. I am Jade was 30 years old when she passed away. She has shared with me that she Oh, we heard some Oz 30 is way above the curve for these things.

That's a great full long life to it for haunted doll. Jade was 30 years old when she passed away. She shared with me that she accidentally fell down an incredibly steep staircase. Oh, what am I saying? She repeatedly emphasized just how steep the staircase was. It was pretty much a light house, man. It was fucked up.

This is like a totally normal staircase to die on. You wouldn't be embarrassed to die on this. You know, she you know, she fell down a three step staircase and it's just embarrassed about it. Oh, dude, it was like a one inch rise at a one inch run. It was ridiculous. She was in such a hurry and she lost her footing. She has shown me visions of this happening.

They are. No, no, no. Hold on. Let me show you. It's crazy. It's so steep. If she had been wearing... He's like an M.C. Asher painting. If she had been wearing different shoes, her death may have been avoidable. Jade was not used to her new stilettos.

Jade is so... I never thought about a haunted doll being like, yeah, I died, but listen. It wasn't my fault. Learn from my mistakes. Break in your shoes. Jade's doll vessel is very tall. To the top of her head, she is 20 inches tall.

Holy shit. If you count her removable headpiece, she is about 25 inches. It's like a hat. Like a hat. Hey, all hats are removable headpieces, though. A removable headpiece. Not for dolls, guys.

Is the removable headpiece haunted? Can I just read this? Please. Jade's body is made completely of porcelain, including her stomach. Okay. Huh, huh. All right.

She... Jade's body is made completely of porcelain, including her stomach, so she does not bend at the waist. She is on the heavier side as a result of this. Hold up, hold up, hold up, hold up, hold up, hold up, hold up, hold up, hold up, hold up, hold up. At what point is this a haunted statue?

I would argue if you are not able to flex in any way. If your joints don't bend in any way, you're a statue at that point, yes? And she is even more stunning in person. Jade has so many beautiful details. I tried my best to get pictures showing this. I'm going to have to ship her in a pretty large box,

and it will likely cost me much more than usual. So keep that in mind when you look at the price. Can you imagine someone telling you this, and then later they were like, there's also a ghost inside of it. I should have mentioned actually the ghost is, I'm not going to do a lot of details about that, but also there's a ghost inside of it.

Please be prepared for paranormal activity if you decide to adopt Jane. She is not a shy lady. She loves to make her presence known, and she really revels in attention. She may give you a startle at times with loud noises. Sometimes it's just like loud banging hitting the outside of the house,

and suddenly you hear it inside, increasing in speed, urgent. This can certainly be scary, but Jade means you, no harm. Okay, I'm not going to know the difference between the outside banging that turns into faster and faster inside banging. That does mean me harm.

I don't want to become inoculated to outside banging that becomes louder and faster inside banging. I want that to always scare the shit out of me. We've been doing a lot of haunted, well you've done a lot of haunted doll watches on the show, right? Uh-huh. Have you ever heard of noises outside the house?

Yeah, that's a lot. At what point is the ghost not trapped in a doll? Yeah, she is not a dark spear, it would never harm anyone. She has shared with me that she did not. Okay, she has shared with me that she did not even eat the flesh of animals when she was alive, which is, let me think, the craziest way to say that. Possible, possible.

Jade possesses such a strong, positive energy. She has such an uplifting, comforting quality. She's a ghost. Jade certainly makes for great company and loves to stay close to your side. She's a ghost, again, she's a ghost. If you leave her in another room as you sleep, you'll often find that she has moved you

closer to you, hard pass. I see her a non-believer, so let me convince you with these very fast bullet points. I'm sorry. One, Jade communicates via Weegee board, pendulum, EVP, spirit dice, automatic writing and dream walking. Through dreams, she has showed me events in my future before they happened, mostly stairs related.

Jade reveals her presence with an orb that I describe as electric purple. It's neon. It's not, because that would not be a ghost. I've never witnessed orbing as bright as Jade's. Ugh, let's delete that word. I've never seen these orbs like these. Ha-cha-cha.

It always... Goryeoza. She loves everyone equally, but has admitted that babies are her favorite. You don't have, hold on. No, you don't, it's the wildest thing in here yet. Listen, I know it may seem like I really like babies. I like everyone equally, so calm down.

Also, no one likes everyone equally. This is so wild. As an avid animal lover, pets are drawn to her. They can sense how she feels a deep adoration for them. My eldest cat always wants to rub up close to her and eventually falls asleep right at her feet. Hey, how chisous is your cat gonna be when you sold her favorite doll for $60 cool dollars?

Hey, hey, excuse me, Vicky, can we talk about this for a second? That's like my favorite doll to curl up on. You know that. I've pissed on that doll for years. I've pissed on that doll for years. We noticed her facial expression changing, comma, her eyes shifting. That's a whole bullet point.

She loves to make sounds as I previously mentioned. She also whispers and hums. She does this most when the sun is setting. This is her favorite time of the day. Good, now I know when to be out of the house if we're going to share a space. Okay, just a couple more,

because again, I don't want to spend all, there's pages upon pages. There's so much, holy shit. As you look at Jade's pictures and read about her, you may feel her calling to you. Are you the one for her? Jade can't wait to meet you. Hard sell, okay?

That's how used car salesmen sell their jeeps. Does this look like the jeep for you? Get up in this jeep. This is like, it gets a little all-purpose. I hear towards the end. I cannot stress it enough. Give spirits time. Give them space.

Remain open-minded and you'll be amazed. By the way, I wrote this. I noticed many other sellers on eBay literally copied and pasted this from me along with other things, just letting everyone know winky face. I love this. Territorial about her pros.

Loves Goose and Dolls. That's the primary eBay seller. Who's buying this haunted doll for $60 with a closed mind? Yeah, I mean, I assume this is always. I'm assuming this is sold, it's gone. It's already gone, I'm assuming. We're going to do some audience questions

from some people who sent them in. We're going to call you down, one by one to the mic. Oops, it's sold. Congratulations. You're all done. It's $60. We have done more for the haunted doll industry.

Yes. All right, so we're going to call a few people down. Go ahead and just head to one of, there's a microphone there and a microphone there, which everyone's close. What's your name? Shruvi. So my question is, is recently I've been writing

an extensive story and every time I come to a fight scene, I don't know how to write it. Sure. So I was wondering, how would you write a fight scene? What's your story about though? Pirates. Thank you. This is how I would write it.

Okay. Okay. Lights up. All right. One pirate looks at another. He says, go eat beans. I have scurvy and they start fighting like a scurvy person. Okay, you're describing the action,

just I want the words in the book. Oh wait, are these the words in the book? This is not a good book, my friend. Is he using scurvy like a weapon? I have scurvy, look out, I'm a cop on you, I think. He talks a lot about how he has scurvy and then about 10 or 15 pages after this, middle of the fight, he's like, actually.

Well, it's a girl pirate. Okay, thank you. No, this is good, it's important because girls can't get scurvy. No, she like stands up to her full height or the inverse of whatever scurvy does and is like, actually I didn't have scurvy the entire time. Isn't that good?

And then she wins the fight. I think it's important when you write not to spell everything out and to let the audience kind of fill it in like in the air picture. So I would just write clang, clang, clang, clang. Yeah, that's good. Oof, oof, ow, blood, clang.

My life blood, it's everywhere, oh no. I've never seen anyone move like that. I like when authors do that, by which I mean I hate it because it's like, give me the words when it's like, they drew their swords and then it's like a new paragraph and it's like, the fight was very short. New chapter, fuck you, what happened in the fight? Tell me everything, make it exhaustively detailed.

He pulled, she pulled the sword out of the scabber and the other one did too. They took a step closer than another step, than one more step. They're almost in sword fighting distance now. One of them stepped back. Uh-oh, the other one took a step forward. They're back sort of neutral ground.

The swords touched a little bit, then they didn't. Wait, it's starting to sound kind of erotic? Can I, can I, can I ask, is that off the table in this book? I'd rather not. Okay, all right. Well, I don't know how you're gonna compete in the very competitive erotic pirate market.

Oh yeah, but just keep writing, then their swords kissed and the swords kissed again. Oh, their swords kissed so hard. Oh, poetic shit. Don't even ask me to blur this book because I was gonna write, this book has everything when clearly it doesn't. There's a lot of things you're keeping out of this book.

Does that help? Yeah, sure. No, you don't have it, it doesn't help at all. Thank you, Truffy. Thank you. Hello. Hello. Hello, how are you?

You can tilt that microphone up, I believe. I'm Jack. Hey, what's your name? Oh, hey, I'm Jack. Hi, Jack. Hi, Jack. Hey, so my question starts with some good news, which is that I have recently graduated college in December.

Congrats. Thank you, thank you. And continues with some good news, which is that my lovely girlfriend is also attending college still in grad school. Fantastic news is. Well done. You all got it all figured out.

The bad news is that I'm still in college, but I'll figure it out. The bad news is that that has separated us, and we now live in different cities. So frequently, most weekends, I have to go back up to the city where she lives to see her, which presents a problem. And that problem is that my vape

keeps setting off her smoke detector. Yes. Just like Romeo and Juliet. Star-crossed lovers of the ages. Hail, as old as time. Our parents didn't care if we were together, but my vape did. So what I'm wondering is, how is it that I can keep spending this wonderful time with my girlfriend,

but also keep lippin' on that cotton? Yeah. Write that fucking cotton. Listen, you've got to compete at Regionals next week. You can't stop rippin' cotton. You need to practice. You'll never run in the triple volcano. You don't keep cranking that cotton.

If you're a cop or an adult family member of mine who's older than me, you'd legally have to pause the podcast or mute it for a little bit. If you take a toilet paper roll or a paper towel roll and stuff it with dryer sheets. No shit. I was thinking the exact same thing. That'll get you there.

You can use that for other stuff, too. Unpause, cops. Wait, no, you're going to hear it. How's it that you're in? How pausing works. They'll never hear the rest of it. We had a moving tribute to all the cops. Later in the episode, they'll never hear it now.

Listen, it was a star-centered visit. Star-centered tribute to cops. And now here's John Legend to talk about cops, I guess. OK. Jack, your priorities kick ass, bud. Jack, come inside. Dinner's ready. I can't, Tim.

I gave you the most sort of stoner technology answer to that. But there's also windows or blow it somewhere else. How chump is your car? So you can just blow it under a table or something. What's that? You're something Yankee can't blow, my dude. They're fairly large. And they kind of expand into the space.

Oh, what are you doing, dude? You've got to have one. Jack, Jack, do you have your rig with you now? No, we can't. There's a nice theater. I don't want him to crank cotton. I just want to see what kind of work we're working with. The problem is I've had to replace it temporarily

with a jewel because otherwise I can't go visit my girlfriend. Oh, my god. Save that for how did this get made? The cloud chucker just sits in my room now sad and forlorn because I can't bring it to Baton Rouge. If you had brought it, I could have fixed it for you. I just would have swapped out the coils for some ohms. How often does this happen to my man?

Well, it would happen every time that I went up there, which is why I've had to switch because I love my girlfriend and she loves me. She does not love having to do with a fire alarm going up every time I visit it. OK, yeah. Honestly, I hate to say this, but the problem lies with your girlfriend.

No, no, no, no. Hear me out. You should have taken the batteries out of the fire alarm long ago and you should have disconnected it and thrown it in the garbage because the important thing is that my god, Jack keeps cranking that cotton. And that's the last we ever heard of them. Hey, everybody, it's Justin McElroy, human and non-podcaster.

Leave those things together. They're extremely important. Those are your helpful fire friends. Yeah, I don't know what other advice we can give you, Jack, other than turn your head in a different direction. Look for it. I don't care how fat the cotton is that you're blowing. Find a 20 cubic foot space that you can exhale into.

He does a big pillow. A nice pillow. You have so many options, Jack. In fact, Jack, I think you just got up here to brag about how fat your fucking cotton is. And Jack, Jack, I wish that was this was the first time we had fucking fallen for that on this show. That says a lot about us and our audience.

If you were interested in this, and this is completely your choice, maybe your girlfriend can help you quit. I'm sorry, what was your name again? Hi, Callie. Callie. Callie, next time that Jack cranks just some huge cotton, look at him, wait three beats and say, damn, dude, that cotton's outrageous.

And just keep doing it over and over again. Especially when it's not. Yeah. When it's really mediocre cotton. And eventually, Jack will be so, so conscious of go back to cigarettes. Yeah, that's great. Where he belongs.

Holy shit. When you see Jack like, raise the babe, get really. And get really like, oh, god. Call somebody on the phone like he's fucking doing it. Get over it, hold on. Open up Vine. Hold on, this is going on Instagram. Go ahead, Jack, create that shit.

Jack, I know that doesn't help, but it was good for us very much. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. All right. Brynn, I assume. OK, Brynn, thank you for joining us. Brynn's, we ask people to keep the things they sent in succinct

and just leave enough things to mystery that can give us enough sort of stuff to play with, enough goof runway. Brynn's teaser is the best thing we've ever received in our email inbox. And do you want me to read what the teaser was? Or do you want to? Go for it.

What Brynn sent in is genius. She sent in the teaser for my question is corn vending machine. What? I think I speak for the room when I say we're all ears. OK. So I'm from South Louisiana, but I'm attending college in North Louisiana

where there's a lot of hunting. OK. So there's a lot of deer corn vending machines. What is deer corn? Yeah. What? Deer corn is what you lay out to attract the deers. Like corn.

To shoot them. Yeah. OK. Like riding corn. What do they do to it that makes it not Griffin corn? It's not on a cob. It's what? It's not on a cob.

I can enjoy corn not on the cob. So the first time that I heard about it, I was thinking, like, it's an actual corn on the cob vending machine. Yeah. So how can we make that happen? OK. OK.

Callie. I'm sorry. Fuck yes. Welcome to Dragonstone. Yeah, right. You've confused our show with Shark Tank. Oh my god. But if you are looking for investors,

you have come to the right place because I am interested. And I'll give you a bajillion dollars. OK. All right. Here I go. Here I go. Here I go. The part where the corn lives that you can see it through the glass

does have to be refrigerated just for food safety reasons. When you buy it, it's going to go down a tube. There's three different tubes. Regular tube, butter tube, butter and salt tube. At some point, that tube's got to go through a hot zone. A hot something. You know the cup that picks up your bottle from some vending machines and takes it down?

That's just filled with boiling water. So it picks up your raw corn, boils it right there as you watch. And then it shoots it out at you super fast. But you got to watch out for deer because they got wind of this. They love that shit. They love it. They said, we're tired of you selling us dried bags of murder corn. Can you imagine fucking being a deer and seeing someone

just eat real food corn and be like, fuck, soft corn. No wonder we keep getting blasted. I can't believe I died for hard crumbly corn. This is the pits. Oh, Bryn, I wish I lived in your world. Just climb inside that brain and just live right in there for a while. That's the kind of brain, Bryn. You've got the kind of brain that not only fleetingly

had the idea of corn vending machines, but then another part of your brain was like, hey, good stuff. Let's hold on to that for a little bit. Let's go ahead and cling to that concept for a grip because it's going to be useful someday. This is your own personal slumdog millionaire. That's just the moment that that idea waited for. Because somebody sitting in here is a vending machine magnate

who was like, I'll find Bryn after the show. Or I'll steal that. Yes, that's more likely. I was going to say, does that help? But I don't know that there's any way it possibly could help. We would have to splinter our reality into another dimension. It doesn't. Did that not help?

I mean, it did not help. It did not help. Thank you, Bryn. Take it. And thank you to you, New Orleans, for having us here. We can bring those lights back down. Yeah, it's a little bit scary. This has been the most fucking fun spot to hang out in for three days.

We have had the best time. Thank you all so much. This is not a joke. It has been my dream since I was a child to come visit New Orleans. Like I've been thinking about it for decades. Yes. And it was so, so good. It totally lived up to it.

And it's been amazing. Now, is that because he thought he'd meet Gambit? Yes. Yes. And I thought Gambit would look like Harry Connor Jr. Like those two. Thank you. I asked somebody, like, hey, is Gambit big down here?

And this is what was, uh, yeah, Gambit's big down here. Thank you to the Orphanium Theater for having us here. They've always been super nice. Thank you to Paul Saborin. Thank you, Paul. Paul, you are. It would be impossible for us to try and do this without Paul. He is a godsend.

If you haven't listened to Paul and Storm, go check it out, PaulandStorm.gov. What is it? Yeah. Thank you to Maximum Fun for having us on the network. Go to MaximumFun.org. Check out all the great shows there. Thank you to John Roderick and the Long Winters

for these of our theme song and set apart trophy album for the days to bed. Also, thank you to our families. And thank you to our dad and our wives and our kids and everybody for being great. I want to say thank you to a great little podcast called Shmanners that I just adore. I also want to say thank you to Sawbones.

Yes. Thank you to our daddy and... Thank you to Amanda. And Amanda. Who wants to help us put on two or three? And thank you to this beautiful, beautiful theater for having us. It's been a treat to do shows here the last two days.

You all have been amazing. Thank you so much. Thank you. Every week on My Brother, My Brother Me, we like to read a question from the Ahu Answer Service. And then we come back to it the next week with some of our thoughts that we have developed about it. So here's our one to grow on for this week.

Yeah, this one is sent by Emily. Thank you, Emily. It's the Ahu Answers user, Bobby, who asks, can I cook raw chicken in the Michael Wave? Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! OK. Why don't you just sit back for a while? I'm traveling!

I'm gripping McAllroy. Is it my brother, my brother, me, kiss your dad's square on the lips? Maximumfun.org Comedy and culture Artist owned Listener supported Welcome back and thank you, Dan, for that scathing report. As you know, Max Fun Drive is coming up March 18th to March 29th,

which has some folks pretty excited. But as families around the world get ready to celebrate this season of giving, community, and quality podcasts, some are wondering if it's just too much. Are they, though? They are. Some people are all for comedy and culture, but with 45 shows offering hundreds of hours of bonus content, plus all the Max Fun meetups taking place around the world,

some people think it's too much. While other people think it sounds totally awesome. I took my granddaughter to the mall to get her picture taken, and the mall pod fairy was short, and I, you know, I'm just gonna say it, I'm sorry, but everyone knows the pod fairy is tall. Well, I think we should just leave it there. Until next time, here's the news you need to know.

Max Fun Drive runs from March 18th through 29th. Be sure to listen to all of your favorite podcasts. I know I will.