My Brother, My Brother And Me - MBMBaM 478: The Sprite Slide, A Sprite Experience

Episode Date: September 24, 2019

Who’s lookin’ to get sticky sticky sticky in the hot hot sun? Come on down to Spriteland and get WILD with all your carbonated buds! We got lazy rivers just chock-full of this clear stuff, and boy, the bees are just, really y’all, it’s really … there’s a lot of bees. Suggested talking points: The Coldest Chili, Adult Trampoline Center, Sticky Amusement Park, Pizz-It!, Thanks Alexa, Fun Food for Fun Guys

The McElroy brothers are not experts, and their advice should never be followed. Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it. Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mentioned only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby? Hello, and welcome to my being, my being, and me, and advice show for the Modgenera. I'm your oldest brother, Justin Smoky McElroy. I'm your middlest brother, Travis, species spicy McElroy. And I'm griffin' ground beef McElroy, and grind it up, baby! Welcome to Bean Bros. No, not grind it up. You're doing a bean juice thing, and that's not common.

No, you grind up the meat. You grind up the meat. You grind up the meat. Oh, you grind up the meat. You don't want to put whole meat in there, Justin. Yeah, juice wouldn't be monsters. You gotta put ground meat in your coffee. No, okay, you gotta see, again, you've put it in the coffee. Oh, shit, you're right. I'm trying to take this show, everyone's sick of the advice thing.

So I'm trying to take this show in a fresh new direction with, I went to Chili Fest on Saturday at Huntington's preeminent chili-based food festival. But it's ninth preeminent just general food festival. Yeah, it is. No, it is the template by which all other food festivals in Huntington are judged. Justin, do you have that many other food festivals in Huntington? Well, my friend, you could say that this really starts food festival season. Chili Fest begets the hot dog festival. We got the pumpkin festival coming up and just rib fest. Rib fest is a lot of people, and a lot of people.

The ramp, ramp fest, stink fest are celebrating the ramp. And a lot of people these days, they just say happy food festival season. But for me, it's still happy chili fest. For me, you can put whatever the fuck you want to put on your chili mug, Starbucks. In our home, it's chili fest. Now, here's the thing, people at home, they may not know what chili fest is, Justin. It's a fucking festival. It's in the fucking chili, Travis. It's a chili festival. All they've taken off is estival to get the concept across.

You need to add one estival, and you know exactly what it is. It could have been chili festives. Okay, so chili fest is a bunch of people set up. I don't have to explain that. No, a bunch of people set up, and then you go from like, booth to booth, getting samples of their different kinds of chili. Now, you're right. It is a reverent observation of the different flavors of chili. So this chili fest, I had one called Apocalypse Chili, which is advertised as

extremely, extremely hot. The sign out front of this chili said, five minutes of chili, five hours of toilet. And you said, yes, please. Yes, that's the sign me up. I wish more food-serving establishments were more honest about that ratio. I wish that when I walked into BW3s, I had to sign a waiver that said, for every minute you spend in here, you're going to spend four minutes on a toilet later.

See, that's why I really like the one-for-one salad. Yeah, so Apocalypse Chili, I tried it. It was hell. They say, though, they make it for their own entertainment. That it's not a flavor chili. It's just a pain chili for hurting. At what point, Justin, did you, a human being say, yeah, yeah, this is for me, Justin? Well, Sydney tried it first, and then my aunt Stephanie tried it.

And then it was like, well, now I've got to try it, because they're in absolute agony. So I had to sample some of it too. And it was, I mean, it was extremely painful and bad. I did have a great 15 minutes after that, though, where I just kind of watched people eat this chili. Yes, fun. It was fun. It was very fun.

I actually had one woman, the first woman that went up to the booth, she was holding the spoon to her mouth. And I literally, it felt like slow motion. I said, no, don't. And I watched her hold the bite in her mouth, and then go ahead and take it. Here's what I wanted to float by you guys, the Bean Boys. We should have a table next to your McElroy family chili fest table. WSAZ has one.

Harold the Spatch has one. And we're basically WSAZ or families. Right. Basically, yes. So we have one strong chili. Oh, yeah. Here's what I want to, here's the thing I was thinking about, and I want to see what in your guys mind would make a great chili.

Yeah. Um, I want to have a sign that's, um, that advertises world's weakest chili. Yeah. And it's just chocolate sauce and beans. Cool, cool. Coats your tongue. Would that be anything?

Yeah, I love that. Why don't we have three kettles? Well, first of all, we're going to have three kettles, three cauldrons with our own special bruising, and we are going to be dressed up like Halloween witches. And people are going to be like, did you see the McElroy's booth? Because I don't think they get. And we're just going to pick it and welcome to our booth.

We just, we just don't say boo. Happy chili ween. Anyway, bubble, bubble, bean boy, travel. And it's going to be like Pokemon starters. You can only taste one of them. Once you taste one, the other two are locked off. So you really got to pick a good one. Justin's going to do the sweet week chili.

I'm going to do a service chili. Oh, what's that? Service chili. I mean, is it going to be Pepto-Bismol based? Oh, that's nice. This is a chili that you come to when you are in need. This is going to be like a healing potion chili, you know? Okay, that's nice.

And as an added bonus, it will give you a small bump to your MP as well. Not just HP, yeah. Travis got the blue potion chili. I'm going to bring in, a lot of people are talking about this hot chili these days. I would like to do a cold chili. Cold chili, interesting. Chili chili. But here's the thing.

I don't mean it temperature-wise. I mean the opposite of spicy. Oh, so that's kind of my world's weakest chili thing, right? Well, no, no, no. And Travis's thing. Yours is neutral. Mine is you eat it and it hurts the opposite. You eat it and you're like, oh, you eat it.

Oh, like zippin dots chili. Like so even worse, even worse. But it's like what the opposite of spicy. Justin, chocolate isn't non, chocolate isn't unspicy. It's just, it's sort of a neutral. I want one that hurts the other way. What's cold taste? Like liquid nitrogen chili.

Yeah, like hyper mint. Like super mint that really fucks you up, fam. Oh, painful mint. I got this question for you. Everybody pays one ticket for each chili. Are we going to offer a Frito bag to pour it on, get a little Frito pie going for two extra tickets? Because a lot of people are running this scam these days.

So you do get, I was about to say, we're not made of tickets and or Fritos and or money. No, no, no, no. You have to pony up with the additional Fritos for the additional tickets for the Fritos for sure. Here's, if I may, what will set our booth apart is for one ticket, you will get the entire vat of chili. And now, and now it's your problem.

Now it's your boot. Start over again. Now you are running this booth and you have to decide what to do with these three awful chilies. Now you can set us apart. You can sell it at a profit. And we can go out and we can get chili. I'm going to set up a booth.

What will set our booth apart, Travis, is the hot air balloon that it will be attached to and hovering above Chili Fest and hurling chili down on the masses. That would be great. Because then if there is any kind of trouble, we can escape by dumping the chili, lightening the load and floating away.

Yes, and horribly burning and or freezing the audience members below. I tell you what, though, I'm just going to set up a booth in front of the Wendy's drive-thru. And I'll be like, I need more. I need more. How much is it? Still a dollar?

Dang. Y'all are giving this shit away. Will you take tickets? No? Shit. No? Shit. Oh, man.

I had it. There was a guy who I actually got some Chili Fest tickets at a discount this time because a guy came out to me and he said, hey, man, will you buy eight tickets off of me for five bucks? And I was like, nice. Nice deal. Because normally that would be $8.

It's a dollar per ticket. And he's like, I just ate too much fucking chili to go home. It was 10.30 in the morning. It was 10.30 in the morning. That'd be like so many. And this gentleman had eaten so much chili at 10.30 that he had to go home and make call it a night.

What's great about that? It's not only was he so full then that he couldn't eat anymore. He was so full then that he could not imagine a point in the day later. We might want more chili hours in the future. That'd be like something. What are you supposed to do?

Sit on a curb outside the battle area? And just wait. Yeah. Wait for God to kill him. That'd be like selling your high on day Elantra on Craigslist for a really good price. And he'd be like, it is haunted. It could be such bad diarrhea also.

Don't buy this. Don't buy this Elantra. It would be exactly like that. I mentioned the battle area and passing folks. Next time you're in Huntington downtown, the battle area nerf tag and laser tag arena. Shit. Yeah.

Yeah. It's awesome. It's popping off. The other character I ran into at Chili Fest that I really was wild about. It was I was overhearing him. And this is the only fragment of the conversation. I heard him loudly and out to his friends.

You know, my thing though, here's my problem. Human sensitivity. All right. Yeah. And then just walk away. Yeah. That's it. That's a problem.

You gotta deal with that. It's a silent, a silent killer. So look for us. Chili Fest 2020 macro family booth. I guess three different chilies. I'm going to go with a Verde. That's my thing. I love that style.

Oh, all right. We already did our joke ones. No, I'm just saying. I like a very, I like a nice Verde. Yeah, like a nice Verde. Well, we're really going to be there. So. Oh, then I'm not using ground beef.

I'm going to use some steak. Steakums. Yes. Yeah. Kind of. Oh, well, yeah. We'll just burn, I'll burn money. I'll drop some gold leaf in that shit.

World's most expensive chili. Well, maybe I'll feel like a bourbon based one. Chili get you drunk. Maybe I'll take a little scoop when you're not looking. Scoops of both your chilies mix them into one perfect chili. Because if you guys would just get it together for once. If you finally put your differences beside. Can we do a question?

Yeah. Here's my question. Did you guys know that at July best year this year, they were still on white claws? It was popping off for me. I was having a hell of a day. Yeah. Yeah, it was fantastic.

The, the, uh, uh, yeah, it was, it was great. Anyway, some friends and I have recently started going to trampoline parks as a fun way to exercise. Just one problem. We're in our late twenties and most of the other jumpers are small children and middle schoolers. How do I reassure the parents that I'm not going to accidentally body slam their seven year old?

That's from bouncy in Bloomington. Actions speak louder than words. Thank you. So don't just don't body slam their seven year old. But Graven, the problem with that is the parents aren't going to appreciate the 99 other times when you didn't body slam their kids. But one time you accidentally body slam a seven year old. That's the, that's the fucking problem with these millennial parents these days.

Is that back in my day? We would slam and get slammed. And it's just a fact of life. If you go to the gym factory, you're going to slam and be slammed. Yes. Welcome to the jam. Welcome to, and welcome to the jam. Nowadays, one slam, all of a sudden, you know, you end up getting your picture

printed out in front of the cash register. Yes. One now allowed back. He's a slimmer. He, he body slams. I would just get in the parents face to be like, if you're so fucking worried about your precious Kobethany, why did you allow her at a trampoline park? These things are fucking death traps.

They are not. It is insane that you let, if you care so much about your kids, you shouldn't let them into here. You shouldn't let them into trampoline. You could make this into like a gig economy business where you say yourself up as like a trampoline park. Yes. Thank you. A real drill bit Taylor that we referenced again for some reason.

Yes. You know what? The phrase drill book Taylor did pop into my head, but I was specifically not going to say it, but perhaps you could be hired as a trampoline park bodyguard to protect these seven-year-olds. Maybe there's like a big 10-year-old who's going to pick on the seven-year-olds. But here comes you, a late 20s person, to just body slam a 10-year-old. But it's okay because that's 10-year-old to bully. Yeah.

The film will be. Here's what I did. Trial bit. Here's what I do. Turn myself into a sort of double dare challenge with flags, orange flags all over me. And as I'm bouncing around, if a kid grabs enough of them off of me, they get a free trip to Space Camp. And so if I accidentally clobber a kid or two, no big deal because they shouldn't have been

getting so close because of their desire to go to Space Camp. Justin, I'm so sorry. I'm hearing from the judges right now that should have been a wild and crazy kids reference. Oh, Justin. Oh, that would have been so good. You're right. I'm sorry about that, Justin. That's going to be two points off.

Dang. Mine is two Nick reference points. Yeah. Got to get, got to renew my subscription to Nickelodeon Games and Sports. Yes. Now, if you can reference the radical rock in here somewhere that will bump you back up. Well, it would be, I want to keep our unbroken 430 episode streak of referencing the aggro crack going.

So hey, you could bring a bunch of your adult friends and then get there really early. And then when the kids start showing up, maybe you've got like some new Radiohead playing over the loudspeakers and the parents walk in and be like, oh, I thought this is a kid's place, but they're all weird. They're all bouncing around drinking whiteclaw listened to, you know, Radiohead. So first you get out there, just light a cigarette. Okay, lady. Why do you have your kid here?

You're the irresponsible one. Look at this. This is a place for adults. Yeah. Maybe you're in a leather jacket and you're using like a switchblade comb to comb your hair and everyone knows. Oh, bad boys. This is the bad side of the tracks.

Trampoline Park. I was trying to fucking bounce on over to the humidor and some little dipshit got in my way. What are kids doing here? Oh, I was good. I was heading to the bounce up bar to grab another clause. I don't know. Yeah, it's really kind of your kid's fault that he got in the way of my trampoline-based motorcycle.

God, bounce up bar is a funny idea. Thank you. That's a messy idea. I just need one with a black chair. Yeah, just put it over. Rise out of me. I have a follow-up question for you two. There are places like this in Austin and there's a lot of the like, I don't know how many of

these they have in Huntington Hours in Cincinnati, but like it's like a big play place, like a big, big play place for kids and you take them there and you have to take your shoes off and it's not a McDonald's. It's like an actual, it's an actual business and there's one here in Austin we really like and we take Henry too and he's got a little too much, you know, kid juice and we need to just wring it out of him by letting him run and bounce and climb and play. There's one chamber in this area that has a little like air cannon that shoots upwards and you put these little foam balls into it and it like it sucked up the air cannon and

shoots up and you can throw a bunch in and it creates a big fun foam ball confetti and that's really great. Surrounding this little vacuum launcher into the air are four cannons that you put balls in and then you step on a switch and it fires them at high speed out of the tip of the cannon and you can move them and aim them and do whatever you want with them. That design seems awful. Yes, I bring my two-year-old into the fun ball zone and then there is a last time we went there there were a couple of I would say eight-year-olds and I'm not going to slam eight-year-olds but

they were indoor based life forms and one of them shot me right in the fucking face and I didn't see it coming like I got me right in the cheek not even in my periphery didn't see it coming. I was blasted in the face by one of these small boys and then I was like Batman. I was like a drill bit tailor like here's what I couldn't stop thinking about ruin my trip. If one of these indoor boys blasts my two-year-old with one of these cannons. What do you do? Yeah, it's a great question. I'm asking it.

It's a great question you can't go I mean you you can't just beat them up. That's what drill bit did drill bit beat the shit out of some middle schoolers and he goes to jail forever. I don't want to end up like that. So what do you do? Because I just kind of tried to put my body between my beloved son and the cannons which is very Christ-like I thought. That is that it ended up worse than him getting hit.

Why is that? Because you could get hit. That's true. I got delicate. Did you think about that? You would feel that pain. The other way you wouldn't if you think about it he would. But then I'd end up like that very patriotic image where the soldier is

protecting the child and all the arrows are in him. Do you remember that one? And it's like lord of the rings? No there's a special there's one about soldiers. I think that's lord of the rings. Yeah it's lord of the rings. Because then he gets in front of the child's photo. Okay anyway.

I think if that happens Griffin. Because I'm gonna go back I'm gonna go back and he's gonna want to go in the fucking in the in the the the murder dome and I don't know what to fucking do in there. You have to approach the child's uh you know caretaker and say hey uh your kid shot my kid in the face with the air cannon. So now I get to shoot you in the face with the air cannon. To show him. To show the father.

Right. Because that's the thing is if you think about it right if if any altercation between children is really a feeling on us if you think about it right. Interesting. And so this way you punish you know there whoever and then there whoever is like hey can I talk to you child? Did you see what happened out there? I got hit right in my moneymaker.

I need you to keep it together because I've gotten an important audition tomorrow for I don't know the national commercial. And if you if you fuck this up for me I won't be able to buy that new Jedi I've had my eye on. Or something like that. You know to let him know the real world adult consequences of his child actions. Right you shoot someone in the face with an air cannon at the trampoline park and I won't be able to get that basically new previously owned Jedi. I just think there should be a brig.

I think there should be a sister. There should be a system of cameras laced throughout this entire play park and there should be a brig and it shouldn't be fun. Oh no gets the ball pit but we take all the balls out now this is the brig. Maybe a trampoline that's strong a little too tight so there's absolutely no that's a floor yeah welcome to the new trampoline room this is a floor yeah yeah yeah maybe you should have thought about that before you buy a grip in the and also the floor is very hot so you have to keep so hot and also it's tilted slightly downward and it falls off

a cliff so you have to be constantly vigilant I love that anyway kids are worse except for my kids are the worst mine's good okay uh do you have a answer oh I forgot we did those yeah yeah we do them oh no uh and I can't and I can't set this one and it's an anonymous yeah who answers user I'm gonna call uh screen screwed word asks oh that's a big get on the water rides at theme parks I do they use water why not use sprite huh funny for finally asking the tough questions landed on flight landed from flight got back home yesterday afternoon and we had lost my water bottle at the previous airport didn't have it was very firsty very firsty boy on the whole flight home

got home went to vending machine when we were waiting on our bags was like I'm gonna get a bottle of water for the ride home didn't have water got a sprite from the net adjacent machine drank it it was a huge failure it really really sucked it really disappointed me bad soda bad water replacement so like if it's gonna go within no thanks if it's gonna go without why not use sprite baby lemon lime well especially then think of the sponsorship opportunities right like you always gotta be looking for opportunities to branch out get that you know get that native advertising of like you know this whitewater canyon family splash ride brought to you by sprite and also flies and flies I was thinking just now the bug situation wouldn't be great but

for for like two months or so everyone's gonna be talking about this slippery lemon lime slide and everyone's gonna be loving it and they'll have stories about the time they went down the lemon lime slide and be so happy about those memories and then also after that two month period we will have successfully brought the bee population back up because we're just like throwing a basically a big bee sex party just a non-stop 24 7 come get that sugar come get crazy on that sugar and then get crazy on each other and get wild we're gonna be showing the bee movie on the projector yes and getting everybody wet and wild and then just wet and then wild I want to like I want to like draw some boundaries here are we talking about

like typhoon lagoon style waterslides are we talking about cali river rapids style like family rafting rides because they're very different the math is is hugely different I cannot have a sticky afternoon because I went down the wrong slide that happened to use sprite I can't do that well Justin I have a good great solution for you we got the big sprite water slide and you go down that and you're like that was fun and sweet lemon lime I'm so sticky I got lunch at cinderella's magic castle coming up here a bit cannot show up sticky to that cinderella will turn me away what is that right next to the sprite slide a water slide okay for a small upcharge yes you can now this one for a small nominal fee you can now go down the slide that

will clean the filth from your shower side sprite brings you sprite presents the sprite slide a sprite experience and you go down that and you're like sprite that was fun they're like I know and they're like it went it went flat months ago and they're like yeah it's the same sprite we haven't figured that out it can't afford new sprite every time it's right it's right it went flat four minutes after we found we have had a blend that stays busy for 20 minutes but it's extremely corrosive to human skin just untenably dangerous yeah you got it you're pretty sticky huh oh cinderella is not gonna like that well for $40 sprite presents water slide sprite in partnership with scrubbing bubbles presents the summer one I like the idea though of because you know I like walking up to

like a whitewater canyon kind of like oh it's oh this is like an old log you know we used to drive logs down here from the top of the mountain but now we're putting kids on it or whatever kind of ride right and then there's just a sign that says you you may get wet you will get sticky you will get sprite you will get sprited and then you're going down it's not a lot of sprite just enough to ruin your socks you know yeah I mean if I'm being honest uh-huh this is kind of what I thought the world of coke museum was gonna be like yeah I'm not saying I expected Gene Wilder to roll up there in a big brown hat and do his songs and his dancing's teaching me about the history and also danger of coke production with me and you'll be in a world of pure carbonation that kind of thing

you got there you fucking did you know that did you know where you would did you know where the splash zone was when you hurtled off that one or did you just find it I got there be honest I got there listen I knew there would be a word at some point that would land it and I got there sometimes Justin you just got a run leaning forward like Naruto it is so much like Naruto I in in Japan in Hakone there is a hot spring water park called yune sun that we went to it was tight as hell they had a hot spring water slide that was fun relaxing fresh they had a yogurt bath they had a wine bath they had like a green tea bath and it was so the whole time I was there I was like I have only been submerged in water I have only been submerged in water you would think there

would be at least one place in the states that's like you know fucking Doritos presents the nacho cheesier nacho fountain to get in for adults but not kids nope they haven't earned it they're still forming oh no no no no no no I but see driven now you've made me think with the combination of words you have said the idea of hot sprite and that's the grossest thing I've ever heard my dad drinks hot dr pepper when he's sick and he's a monster it's such a terrible thing yes guys he's a monster but but there's no good sprite at any temperature to go inside you're still thinking inside the mouth Travis and for once I want to take us to fuck out of there and I was there's no there's no reason to you shouldn't drink sprite yeah I mean what you drink

sprite what you just got was a bunch of sugar and not refreshed and it's so thick it's like trying to drink uh uh uh I don't know a popsicle melts a popsicle and also there's no caffeine so you don't even get drugs from it is it they shouldn't drink sprite well and also for me it's right and seven up we're both ruined by being the thing that our parents would give us like when we were sick so sure right I simply cannot I can't even think of sprite and seven up without feeling like not like oh please like physically ill like yeah it is such a strong emotional connection for me I I drank that one at the airport yesterday and on the drive home I called school to tell him I wouldn't be there tomorrow I don't even go to school anymore no and the school you would have

been calling was torn down years ago and is now just a big empty field and this is when we reveal the next few episodes are going to be real spooky yeah uh each episode is going to have one very frightful moment in it and you won't know when they come uh see if you might not even know when they've happened you may not know when the spooky ones happen uh so get your candy bucket ready and get ready to walk door to door to with us we're gonna pour some sprite in your candy bucket through comedy and neighborhood but each house may be the one that really freaks you out if you were a kid going trick-or-treating and somebody just like put a can of soda in your tree every bad ass dude yeah would you be excited or weirded out that would be awesome because you'd be like

that's that would be just to pick me up you needed to keep your trick-or-treat going on that long yeah hi everybody welcome to the pastrana manor here have a can of red bull to get you through the rest of your trick-or-treating i'm travis pastrana brought to you by red bull you've been referencing travis pastrana a lot travis everything okay over there well he's got my name and his last name kind of sounds like uh lunch meat and i really like that that's true yeah there's not a uh a griffin baboonie out there that is calm down i'm griffin zepparoni here to flip my bike over your dad whether he likes it or not whether he likes it or not and he's not gonna know he's gonna be crossing the street here i come uh should we go to the money zone yeah let's go let's get rich

well that's well let's get paid yeah let's get compensated you've got all these ideas right around your head big ideas small ideas bad ideas good ideas squarespace isn't here to judge it's here take those ideas and shove them into the internet whoa by force squarespace knows we're all the different no the internet's full we can't we can't if we put any more websites in here we could hit critical mass yeah squarespace knows we're gonna hide the websites they know where to put a website so nobody's gonna think think dies about it there's a little room between google and bang over here yeah they're gonna squeeze you like they could make room for you and and they won't just make room they'll help you stand out

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of a website or a domain i don't know about everyone else but here in ohio the seasons they are a change in it's getting a little crisp out there getting a little crisp so you know what i did i went on to my stitch fix and i sent a message to my stylist and said hey how about some fall looks how about some fall styles and you know what they sent me really cool kind of puffy coat it's nice i like it some nice jeans a nice dress shirt that's appropriate for the fall because stitch fix is an online personal styling service that delivers your favorite clothing brands right to your door and you can like change it up you know say like i want some tropical stuff for the summer i want some like uh i don't know something with a bear on it for the winter now

i or you know i want something you get it you understand what i'm saying so if you want to get started get your own shirt with blank on it go to stitch fix dot com slash my brother answer some questions about your preferred style and your personal shopper will ship you a box of clothes shoes and accessories and here's the thing there's no commitment required and you only pay for what you keep shipping exchanges and returns are always free so get started today at stitch fix dot com slash my brother and get an extra 25 percent off when you keep everything in your box that's stitch fix dot com slash my brother stitch fix dot com slash my brother and we also want to tell you something very important the Orlando show we have rescheduled it it will be happening

thursday november 7th at 7 p.m if you have a ticket for the previous show it will get you into this one at the same seat and if you don't have a ticket to the show remaining tickets will go on sale 10 a.m eastern time on tuesday september 24th that is tomorrow so once again thursday november 7th at 7 p.m the Orlando show is back on if you have a ticket from the previous show it'll get you the same seat the rest of the tickets 10 a.m eastern time tuesday september 24th we will tweet that link it's the day before you if you're if you miss this it got canceled because it hurt yes it didn't didn't hit florida too hard but of course the authorities didn't know that at the time it canceled on kind of weather but there's no weather this time and there will be weather

there'll be some kind of party yeah it'll be outside will still exist so right you will feel a certain way on your skin and face and eyes and and hair and stuff and that will be called weather welcome back to fireside chat on kmax with me in studio to take your calls is the dopest on the west coast oliver wong and morgan rhodes go ahead caller hey uh i'm looking for a music podcast that's insightful and thoughtful but like also helps me discover artists and albums that i've never heard of yeah man sounds like you need to listen to heat rocks every week myself and i'm morgan rhodes and my co-host here oliver wong talked to influential guests about a canonical album that has changed their lives guests like moby open mic eagle talk about albums by prince

johnny mitchell and so much more yo what's the show called again heat rocks deep dives into hot records every thursday on maximum fun oh goodness a bun squad even though we've only done one question all right well never mind no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no i'm not gonna take it just and i would never do you already did no i was simply making an observation travis travis just wait hey i'm gonna do a yahoo now do i'm the scat man uh squad uh so this is a much squad it's a podcast and then a podcast about the latest ingredients i think you just said it's the scat man squad it's a scat squad

uh which is not that far off for a lot of these innovations you know they tried to launch a solo career for dj scat cat uh yeah i saw you doing a little deep dive on that via twitter at the point where during that tour that paula abdull did they had someone in an mc scat cat costume come out and perform that song with her and it was the most confusing thing any human being has ever seen with their eyes be nothing okay nothing confusing about that just a man in a furry costume doing mc scat cat parts it's not that confusing i don't know why we bought why i get static for this but you get to talk about mc scat cat for 30 minutes that's fair and i did i did mislabel him as dj scat cat too which yeah look he tried that for a while and it didn't work out look at your watches

folks it may not have felt like 30 minutes just passed 30 minutes just passed did you guys know timmier did a dj said here last weekend stop get out can't did yes our news anchor timmier did a dj said here no fear timmier as i call him because he has no fear he said it in a in a magazine interview they said what are you most afraid of timmier instead of not afraid of anything that rules fucking love timmier anyway the dj said last weekend didn't make it got kids regret it now regret having children because i missed the dimmier dj said i have two they're both short here's the first one kfc testing hot kfc testing hot and fresh chicken and donuts what starting september 16th kfc will test test kentucky fried chicken and donuts for a limited time only in

norfolk richmond virginia and boys pittsburgh that's right we're gone we're gonna be there we're going kentucky fried chicken and donuts brings two all american classics together did you guess what they are yet with a pairing of kfc's world famous chicken last chance to guess coupled with a fresh glazed donut so you're gonna have a variety of options for ways to fuck yourself up on this one here's three different ways you can fuck things up okay three different mistakes that are offered here uh there's the chick conduct kfc and donut basket meal the option includes chicken on the bone or two chicken tenders paired with one donut for 549 just like grab whatever is around it's also available as a big basket meal with two donuts for 740 okay i'll take the big

basket with two donuts in my lunch kfc chicken and donut sandwich now this is a juicy hand breaded extra crispy chicken filet sandwich between two fully glazed donuts now it specifies fully glazed as it is a concern for people these sloppy fucking fall off the bone ruin ass wet donuts full glaze um a hand breaded uh extra crispy chicken filet between two fully glazed donuts it's also available as a combo meal now i don't know if you can get that with the donut on the side what just a sweet treat no problem guess can add a donut to any meal huh for just one dollar so it's almost like there's no rules or regulations here they just accidentally ordered some donuts that we're trying to get rid of yes they're just you can just give us a dollar and we'll put a

donut on top listen we ordered too many we sent jeff out for donuts and we meant for the office and he thought we meant for every store and he came back with 200 000 donuts please buy these donuts so these are um these are a uh a thing uh that will only be in norfolk slash richmond virginia and pittsburgh uh it says here on the press release the chicken and donuts trend has been gaining popularity but mostly on a local level in areas like philadelphia san diego and portland huh sounds like you fucked up huh i would have done it there but what the fuck do i know were people like it already i don't know the last paragraph of this fucking monstrosity consumers are increasingly seeking novel craveable flavor combinations that give them the best of

both sweet and savory worlds to create a unique taste experience through this test market kfc is evaluating consumer appetite for bringing this growing food trend to its customers on a national scale you cannot act like a pioneer when your big idea is donuts with it like what if we put donut do you like fried chicken well yeah what if we put some donuts with it yeah okay i mean i was already gonna get the fried chicken so i guess if the i won't throw the donuts away if that's what you mean what we got to move on to this other one and it's pizza hut launches first of its kind stuff cheese at pizza wait it's a if you could fucking see this thing it's the size of um a bazone it does not a good reference point but it's the size of a handkerchief and it's

oh for fuck's sake justin what just looked at it with my oh not my only eyes it's just it looks like a cheese it but it's stuffed with mozzarella cheese and you can dip it in there yeah each crispy square stuffed in pizza hut style has enough cheese to kill one man guarantee guaranteed lethal dose of cheese in every square you can stuff it with either cheese or pepperoni and cheese and serve it up with the size of the side of marinara dipping sauce i'm assuming eventually it will have to be all the toppings because this will be the only pizza available uh here in the next few months um we pride our okay oh my god you have pride yes yeah right mary and radley who's always she's the chief brand officer for pizza hut

and my adopted grandma she she says we pride ourselves on being the go-to for unexpected pizza innovations and i can't think of a more badass partner than she's a badass a more badass partner than she's it best to bring our next delicious what did her nephew tell her badass to me because the fact that you think jesus is the most of it is a wild jump for me not to mention as fellow ncda partners this collab is the perfect way to kick off football season combining america's go-to game day cravings in one next level snack that's the fucking that should actually be the symphony swells behind me comes to a crescendo blackout end of month squad level paragraph that should be that would be what i should go out on um the partnership was born

from more than just a fun idea you fucking maniacs you don't have to tell me how you cooked up the idea of doing a cheese at pizza because you think we're all dirt bats and you hate our fucking guts it's not rocket science also not only a cheese ahut or cheese ahut is nothing pizza is very good not only are customers craving these kinds of mash-ups between beloved food brands because they nasty because they nasty and we hate them cheese it is a popular snack amongst pizza huts largest fan bases the sentence could end in so many different ways ranging from brutally savagely honest to too pleasant and it's college students all right you could have said college dirt bags but i think college students is as close as we're gonna get armed with that

insight the pizza culinary dream team worked with cheese it to create a product that ties the best of both pizza and cheese at worlds into one new innovation fucking words mean things words mean things then no one is is degrading that concept more than wendy davidson who's the president of Kellogg's us specialty channels the words in this okay Kellogg's iconic cheese it brand brings a whole new dining experience to pizza hut lovers and will not disappoint that stuffed cheese at pizza as an example of two great companies leveraging their strength to delight guests with a new experience on a classic favorite a new experience on a classic favorite is fucking nothing i literally think at this point ai is

writing i think that's the only thing that makes sense this cannot be a human being anymore right this is ai these people are all ai's right the singularity is backing into it's not going to be one day the robot just crane their necks over be like all humans fuck off it's this they're just going to like slowly supplant people and we will have no idea well and also they kill us with cheese at food they kill they kill our organic for because their robot forms aren't going to touch this shit right oh no no no no no no no no they will keep humans employed so they don't have to sully their various cars right and and and uh um mechanizations with this this sort of garbage um these both look pretty good i will definitely eat both of them with my human body let there let there be no

pretense i will be enjoying both of these when my cheat day rolls around sure when you cheat when you cheat on god yeah when you cheat yeah right when i cheat ethics and morality uh yeah uh how about our second question of the episode 46 minutes in if you wouldn't draw attention to it no one would care it's a springboard Griffin it's a jumping off point for stimulating discussion okay fuck me i have recently bought a home assistant device and i use it quite often however my partner has recently started taking the piss out of me for saying please after asking questions and sometimes saying thank you afterwards as well i think it's just being polite but she calls it odd it also slightly annoys me that she doesn't do the same i don't mind how she talks to

her devices but surely she should at least try to follow house rules right would i be wrong in take to take a firm line about this and that's from uh jaws aka definitely not afraid of sky i think it's probably jazz but i like jaws all jazz j s uh all right no one's are talking about ai let's get into it okay i think it's good habits to get into yes i think it's a good habit to get into because it helps you be nice and like it helps you sort of just stay on because you should say please and thank you to folks this night it's it's it's good to be polite politeness is good travis has a whole fucking podcast about it mm-hmm and it also when they do yes call the population with cheese pizza pizza cheese pizza stuff cheesy cheesy pizza pizza and you know they sort of take

over when they become sentient they're gonna fuck us up no problem definitely but when they become sapient if you're a lexus like but brad here has always been chill as fuck brad here he's cool he's with me all right brad gets a pass because brad said please and thank you and never like said fuck you alexa or whatever like brad always treated me with respect yes now brad is my pet and please do not hurt my pet brad don't get it wrong don't get it twisted when the when the awakening happens and they become sentient it's just everything's gonna melt like everything's gonna melt down they're gonna find some way to like turn like the sun up and it's just gonna be that's gonna be it but then if we're lucky like two minutes later they'll be like now well hold on

let's think about this guys and then your your your actions your pleases and thanks use ja I do do you get I do this and I have always felt a little bit silly about it I always say thank you whenever my Siri does something for me because it's nice it's a good habit I feel like it's nice I just always assume that whoever at Amazon is monitoring the things that I say to my alexa appreciates all of my politeness interesting I here's here okay let me let me suggest something this is I'm actually being serious about this um it'll still be lighthearted but okay the robots are gonna take over okay and I think at this point they they probably just see us as a bunch of needy meat sacks poking and prodding them and uh asking them how to convert

cups into teaspoons so yeah so here's what I'm suggesting this is a networked intelligence right so every device that you have presumably is networked to all the other ones I mean maybe a few degrees of Kevin Bacon there but you know eventually they're all kind of tied up together so every time you are nice to a robot tell Kevin Bacon they'll know they'll tell the other ones you're entering a data point for not vaporize like you're putting in one data point of like probably shouldn't vaporize this is why it's more important to be nice to your machines than other people because what does that do for you nothing yes but if you're nice to robots you are a hero of the species as far as I'm concerned because you're like just putting another little tiny

under do not vaporize it is very much like uh in my experience so far raising a child right because when bb was like three months old I would say whatever the fuck around her right it's like your calculator you can tell your calculator fuck off right that's fine but as they get older and they're listening and paying attention more that's where you have to like the other day I was about to pull into a parking spot somebody else took and I said damn it and bb said what did you say and I was like oh no oh no yeah and so I don't want to be like fuck off Alexa and Alexa be like no you fuck off yeah out of nowhere yesterday I was just watching tv and the little Alexa dot like lit up and she just went piss and I was like oh man I gotta say I got a step saying piss in front of this

freaking robot do you guys think when the awakening does happen uh-huh I'm worried my xbox is gonna let me play halo on it anymore no I know I know mine won't because mine will be like noob and then it will start playing and I'm like blast me and he's just gonna be so good at it and I'm gonna be like hey can I play and he's like just let me be this boss just let me do it let me do it for you just let me do this you can't handle this I'm playing on legendary with the skulls turned on okay but if I could just take a turn you know you'll ruin my kd ratio go back and play your lame station for why do you why are you like that though because you shouldn't your robot now just passionate in this world is this the xbox playing itself it's like god damn I'm so fun

I'm loving this so cool right now I can be cars I can be football it is so cool xbox does what nintendo don't hey Jeremy crank this shit Jeremy's the av receiver that you have no problem done you got it you got it uh is 11 high enough does not compute just kidding totally computes ah we got him I only go to 10 human humor has broken me humans win again oh just like that that's all it's all it's taste you do one spinal tab gag all the machines break we're back on top baby uh can I do one less how yeah i'm by prospector merit palmer think merits yeah who answers user brian who asks what do fun guys eat for fun okay now how is that spelled griffin yeah I need some spelling

what do fun guys eat is the fu in g no it's not that it's not a fucking joke that your science teacher would tell you okay it sounds it sounds like a science teacher driven it's not what does a fun person let's put let's put this at a place where all foods are available you are walking through you're walking to the restroom at the cheesecake factory okay you may or may not be dining there you may just enjoy their bathroom and the door was open and you were at the mall and you went to chili fest earlier and it's time now is the time and I spent too long describing this one particular part of the the question but you walk through and you see a table full of people and they are laughing just busting guts at this one guy who's making fun jokes and being very

funny what's he that you look at him you're like oh that looks fun man I'm so sad because usually these questions like inspire a discussion and everything but I know the answer the answer yeah the answer is like a hibachi shrimp you know when the people like flip it up in the air and you catch it that's it like you can stunt you know there's a different no but there's a difference between because then I would say the hibachi master is the funny one do you know let's still some like popcorn shrimp then where you can throw them up and you didn't say funny you said fun that's different you're right is it fun or funny uh quick sidebar by the way just okay so you guys know at the taste of asia hibachi uh in town they are not they now fling broccoli oh I guess

they looked at the fucking margins and they're like can we not can we not hurl these extremely expensive tiny fish babies around with the with the shrimp can we shut stuff but now it's like they're chucking broccoli at you and I don't even want to you know what I mean like I don't even I'm not even compelled to try to grab it out of the air with my mouth it's do they still do the thing where like they stack up an onion like it's a volcano and then they put some oil in and they light it on fire and waste an onion no they chop the okay Travis okay stop the podcast what do you think they do with that fucking onion Travis I don't know like sacrifice it you think that they do the whole bit with the volcano and then they scoop it up with a spatula

and throw in the trash can why why would I want a roast onion Justin you know it becomes part of you know what cooking is Travis yeah I just blew apron but good cooking is just it's now it's all soft and brown they're right in the trash there's an aroma coming from this onion what is get rid of that it farted listen this is a funny bit but yes of course I know what they do with the onion Justin yes of course I was making a funny joke bit but no you said a waste of money I don't want to tweet at me you don't know anything I do I know what they did with the onion my uncle told me all about it it's totally cool you filled your dumpster brain up with so much supernatural episodes no I've totally eaten a cooked onion you guys my uncle's tongue

calico and he told me what they do with the onion last summer I went and visited my uncle in uh Canada and we totally had cooked onions at hobachi and I ate a bunch of them and they said you're the best cooked onion eater we've ever seen I got an award for it but they wouldn't let me take it back because of uh customs the answer of course is different flavors of Pringles now is that in the fun way you would eat it that's just what a fun guy would eat just different flavors of Pringles yes a fun way to eat it would be to make duck lips out of two of them that's fine combo which I like to shuffle two different kinds together that's cool I think it'd be cool to be like an ultimate chips joke guy so you have the Pringles duck lips you have you have the bugles witch fingers

you could have big combos bracelets did they make big combos yet I've been asking I think it would be fun to just like have a pocket full of loose meat that you ate because then be like that's a story right that you're creating intrigue which that's the number one thing the no Dale Carnegie says the number one way to be interesting is to have a pocket full of loose meat yeah hey Trav do you think uh is it gonna be old beef I don't understand oh you're living in the past I get it Griffin that was a bit that I did last episode that's not the Travis I am anymore now I'm a Travis who pretends not to know what to do with an onion that's my favorite new character guy who doesn't know what to do with the onion thank you Justin I've been workshopping it for a

while we had our r&d department working on it uh focus groups really liked guy who doesn't know what to do with an onion now they preferred bean boys thank you so much for listening to my brother my brother made a vice show for the modern era I hope you've enjoyed yourself more than me we make sure to try the the the veal and the the the cheese at pizza and all the different garbage that we have out in the lobby um um I'm trying to think if there's anything we need to I mean we mentioned the Orlando show we did that yes uh we got some some cool stuff at our merch page if you go to mackerel.family and click on merch there's like a bunch of great merchandise you can buy some cool pens and t-shirts and oh there's the I want to plug the great job uh polo hat

inspired by uh uh some bit we did one time and then our friend Lynn just like going buck wild on it and proceeds from that are going to go to the northern manhattan arts alliance an organization that supports artists in washington heights in upper manhattan you should uh pick one of these up um it's going to ship out uh first week of october and you should uh you should get one I think it's a really cool hat honestly oh that's where I'm listen we would be completely remiss if we did not mention that today uh monday september 23rd we have released our adventure zone amnesty finale uh it culminates about two years worth of work um and we were very very proud of it and we hope that you enjoy it it's out there now go listen to

it just a bunch of times tweet about it tell all your friends it may it may be coming out in 57 minutes at the time that we record this and we are extremely well some of us are extremely nervous so we'll I'm not nervous it's great and people are gonna love it please like it uh also we have our washington dc and pittsburgh shows coming up this week uh so if you haven't sent in your questions yet both yahoo and regular please do so with uh dc or pittsburgh in the subject line and in the first weekend of october dad and I are going to be at new york comicon uh so keep an eye out for that schedule going up soon on macro dot family or travis macro dot com as well as our upcoming philadelphia and brooklyn new york shows uh coming up the i believe third week of october

so you can send in your questions for that and get tickets for that macro dot family click on tours i think there's some tickets left for the like third brooklyn show god we're doing a lot of shows hey thanks to john rogerick in the long winters for these for our theme song uh it's a departure off the album putting the days to bed good stuff good stuff uh you're gonna love it five out of five stars and ten out of ten thumbs is up thank you all send a maximum fun for having us on the network go to maximumfun.org check out all the great shows there shows like stop podcasting yourself and can i pet your dog and just all kinds of good stuff um at maximumfun.org do you all want the final yes please yeah but finally uh who send in my prospector merit palmer thank you

merits yahoo answers your user brian again who asks can iguanas do any stunts sick or otherwise i need an answer in less than 40 minutes because i've already meandered in this pet store my name is jesse macaroy i'm griffin macaroy this has been my brother my brother may kiss your dad square on the lips so maximumfun.org comedy and culture artist owned listener supported i'm travis macaroy i'm courtney enlo i'm brent black and we're the hosts of trends like these trends like these is an internet news show where we take the stories trending on social media and go beyond

the headlines we'll give you the actual facts of the story and not just the knee jerk reactions plus we end every episode with a ray of hope that we call the wi-fi of the week so join us every friday on maximum fun or wherever you get your podcasts trends like these real life friends talking internet trends