My Brother, My Brother And Me - MBMBaM 575: Fluffy Like a Sandwich, Folded Like a Taco

Episode Date: August 30, 2021

Well. This is it. The peak of Justin’s career. Nothing will be able to top this, but I guess we’ll try anyway.Suggested Talking Points: Michelangelo Dirty Limerick Boy, The Dirtiest Thirty, Have I met a Serial Killer?, Die With Honor to the Ostrich , Let’s Give Them Pumpkin to Talk AboutSupport AAPI communities and those affected by anti-Asian violence: https://www.gofundme.com/c/act/stop-aapi-hate For resources on anti-racism and fighting police violence: https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/

The McElroy brothers are not experts and their advice should never be followed Travis insists. He's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mentioned only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening What's up, you cool, baby Precious friendship Could have never seen what was coming for me hangs at the skate park hangs by the beach my life It feels It's better it's better

It's better it's better It's better it's better Hello everybody and welcome to my brother my brother and me and advice show for the margin era I'm your boldest brother Justin McElroy. I'm your Mibblest brother Travis big dog a whiff whiff McElroy This is the show this is the my brother my brother me it's an advice show and I have Looking up I was I was logging into the app of this of note today. I'll talk about you were jacking in I was I was hacking in jacking in

You jacking them in so I'm huge on tiktok. Yeah, and yes, I just want to talk about it because is it your character where you talk about Cryptocurrency trends. It's not it's not crypto kid. Damn that hasn't found purchase in the soil crypto kid did not catch catch on is it the one where you just kind of posted a video of some guys that vaguely look like a Love child of our dad and Paul's the boring singing a song together. Well, no, that was oh, no, you did it the music from That's a music for the mercenaries app. It would take far too long to yeah This is um, I will I will tell you I will play the art of the audio this becoming comes such a big hit and This is a touchstone of my childhood

That I've been trying to get going again for years. Yeah So let me just play this and then we'll like move on from there. Give me one second When I was a little lad if I wanted berries and cream a mummy made me do the little lad dance Now mummy's gone, but I still like to do the little lad dance and you might too you just Run in place Nice form. So this is him like telling you how to do it, but here's the actual audio. It looks a little something like this You Look wonderful

Now sing the berries and cream song Berries and cream berries and cream. I'm a little lad who loves berries and cream up the octave go for it berries and cream berries and cream I'm a little lad who loves berries and cream So I've been trying to get this guy to make a comeback for a very long time by the way He's now a dance teacher. Yeah, who does not like to talk about the little no Jack fervor His genre defying performances, which have been called so extreme that they sometimes look and feel like

Exorcisms Explore the tragic comedy of the human psyche, but also he was the berries and cream boy Also, he fucking loves berries and cream and please don't mention it because he don't like it He don't like to talk about it. That's a shame because I like it so much So here's the thing I put this sound up and I I wrote I just uploaded the sound as a as a public service right to take talk And I just wrote on there. Please make great art with this sound It's what we all need and it sat dormant since January 5th. And then at some point in august

All of the teens. Yes All of the teens decided they could do something really special with this sound And so far it the the video itself, which is not even like a good predictor of Okay, the the the sound has been used in 12,600 videos A normal amount a lot. Oh, it's a lot a lot a lot of videos. That's a lot That's a lot. I don't know. It's so big and it went viral and here's the thing about it guys I'm a creative professional

If I may be so bold, I'm like I'm in an entertainer. I'm a creative professional, right? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Definitely. Definitely. Definitely It is almost now 100 assured That the biggest Cultural impact I will have speaking in a global sense Is the fact that I uploaded a clip Yeah, the berries and cream boy Nothing I do after or before

In terms of scope Will reach as many people as the time I clicked upload on the berries and cream boy dance When we get to the 2024 election cycle and msnbc brings you on to get your thoughts because I believe by that point you will be I don't know. Maybe a lawyer or a political commentator your caption at the bottom will say just a macroi berries and cream amplifier Yeah, berries and cream influx. You are you are living you are living the first line of your obituary Right, right. I'm in it. I'm in the moment. I'm in the moment. Just in macroi primarily known for putting berries and cream sound on tiktok Died today when he was murdered by jack fervor Well, justin was the berries and cream guy. No, no

He put the sound up on the tiktok app and all and then he was subject to the biggest thing he's ever And then he was subsequently murdered by the berries and cream guy The truth of this is just a career. I thought it would be fun to talk about but the truth of it is crush Yeah, no, it's the truth of it is crushing me. There's 12,600 Videos millions upon millions of views of my greatest work Which is uploading the south for the berries and cream boy dance. Yeah It's like when michael angelo unveiled uh the the roof of the the sistine chapel But then while he was doing it he farted and then that's all people would talk about for the rest of his life

How do you even that travis? It's not even that travis. It's like it's like if michael angelo Told everybody a dirty limerick that he heard when he was a kid and that was the thing Everybody was like. Oh, yeah, michael angelo. He's the one that always used to recite that dirty limerick for everybody I love that. Hey check out the ceiling of this beautiful building. It was painted by that guy who retold that dirty limerick Yeah, who recited a dirty limerick from memory Except it's like it's even worse than that because it's from a starburst Yeah, it's not even like a funny clip from a movie or a song Like if michael angelo's great claim to fate was he recited this mcdonald's commercial for memory

And we all loved it so much. It was better than his paintings. That actually would be pretty amazing If it was like michael angelo's saying ba da ba ba i'm loving it first But because something had traveled back in time And influenced him to do that Like we loved like you guys know like Sure, we love the nerd shit. You know what I mean? Like dungeons and dragons and munch squad and all this garbage But like our dream is always Like to be able to break free of it. You know what I mean? Yeah, and to be our own

Like to not to just be a mainstream success. Thank you boys is what we are. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm ready. I'm ready to Do somebody who's like who's like Oh, man, I was trying to think of somebody who has done this and has not come crashing back down to earth like fucking problematic Icarus. Hold on. Give me a second Um, no, I don't have anybody but you can definitely happen just sort of like conceptually it might be possible Yeah, it will definitely be us who will make this succeed We'll be the first ones but it's like I finally found mainstream success and

The real double whammy is it's not even a way I'll financially benefit even a little bit Stolen content that I don't have the right to reproduce now I would go so far as to say juice not only will you not financially benefit from it You will not Brand-wise benefit from it. No, no, there will be no increase in your seo because of it You will find Literally no benefit for your great work

The the actual The only actual repercussion might be actually that I find myself at the center of a tawdry legal threat Now but from starburst incorporated. That's something you could make into a drama You're right. Yeah You could make a movie out of that. Yeah, oh the guy that the guy that got sued by starburst I love that guy what a hero to the people it would have been that please you have to you have to come testify No, I don't like talking about the berries and cream thing anymore jack. Please Please jack you have to go testify

This is the biggest thing Biggest thing I've ever did me and jack fervor have a thing in common now Yeah, we don't want to talk about the berries and cream thing anymore. You get it now We get other stuff, you know, you understand why he is the way he is about the berries and cream ad because you also don't want to be just that There is also a possibility here and I don't want to get too meta here But this is such a specific reference and such a weird thing that was created back in like 2000 whatever That it's possible that this is something Justin puts out, right? And some youth sees it now who never saw the commercial

And then eventually time travel is created they go back in time Tell someone about it before the commercial is made and inspires the commercial to be made And it is that loop that allows our like universe to continue to exist Here is how badly that also doesn't benefit Justin though. No, it's not badly. I've bungled this Even if you were to go through to my tiktok page, here's what you would find My username is hoops macaroy. That is not my name. Okay. Can't search that My icon is a picture of four chicken nuggets with their labels on them. That's not helping make me and I have no bio There's no way I have made the perfect

Perfect dead end for content. There is no way I could benefit from this Yep, you fucked it up, but I guarantee you juice Superbowl 2022 Oh, yeah, he's he's back. He's back in a big way It's like how state farm was like, hey guys remember jake from state farm now. He's back in all the shit Starburst is gonna be like one more ride jack and he's gonna be like I can't I've talked so much shit But they're like check out this dope tiktok. I could at least at least fix the bio. You at least fix the bio

Uploaded berries and cream sound. Yes. Yeah. Yep. That's me All rights reserved No rights. No rights creative comments 3.0 attribution License berries and cream funny video tiktok. Justin, could we attempt To parlay this into you Becoming the next berries and cream spokesperson Right now you're now there's grand association

I can't overstate the extent to which This can't this doesn't help me at all. No, not without a little elbow grease. You got might as well be anonymous I get might as well be anonymous You you think anonymous can help you? Maybe anonymous could change that sound towards like Justin McRoy does different podcasts. You can listen to it and donate to him Listen, maybe they can all the anonymous can figure out a way to do that if anonymous is listening. First of all, thank you We're flattered second of all any insight any help you can offer here as to how uh, I guess we can Hack the berries and cream sounds. Yes. Let us know please and the biggest outcome of this would be

Is if starburst brought back berries and cream flavor fruit juice because those were pretty fucking good I think we can all agree and just if you could do something with taste stations next and see Those love that. All right. Please bring that taste stations. All right. Let's let's get let's do our show Yeah, so I don't know why you would listen to us. No at this point like seeing how badly I've bungled this Well, they were checking to see if you would do more of that berries and cream content that they love and hey look at that We did you did it. Yeah, here I am. You've probably found your way To the podcast because I'm so famous from when I uploaded berries and cream that one time Yeah, it's so weird to listen back to this now that you're president in 2024. Yeah, you know, it's like how do they get started?

I will not benefit from this at all. I've wasted it. I wasted my big shot at Like what this happens to people right like green shirt guy, right? You know green shirt guy who is in that one meme where he was laughing. Oh kin bone No, that's red It doesn't matter for my joke because they're both on cameo and like Green shirt guy who is laughing in that one meme is on cameo and he'll send a cameo to your friends and family But like there's a wear a rain shirt. He has to yeah, right? Yes wear a green shirt never video um, I hope he's

Okay, um this week. I'll tell you guys as I was putting the other the question list I think it really helps some people this week. Oh cool. I think we got some real nice change of page actionable emails I've been seeing my current partner for about two years. Most of it being long-distance due to covid. Oh, that's awkward timing I know that's uncalled. I know other people Uh, who've been in that similar scenario. It's gonna be tough All right A friend of mine told me that my partner is planning a surprise dirty 30 party for me The problem is i'm turning 29 this year not 30. Uh, the dirty is 30

God, why do we even need three of us? I actually have stuff to do is it I tried laying down some hints for him, but he seems to think i'm pulling his leg Do I now need to spend the rest of my life pretending to be one year older than I am that's too young in youngstown, Ohio Well, this is okay. It's just occurred to me I think a little bit of the wrinkle here is I think the pulling his leg Is that like media?

Like inspire your joke of like, oh, i'm not turning 30. I'm turning 29 again, right? Yes, exactly that kind of shit, right? I think that's it But because I was like, why would they think you're joking? It's not oh, okay now I get it Because I think we can all agree 30 is a disgusting number And no, I think it's like woof, right? I've said it. I've said it before and i'll say it again Turning 30 is great because you're the youngest old person like that's 30 You can like actively complain about feeling old and nobody rolls their eyes anymore, but you're still young enough

Yeah, that you can like you could start playing you could start playing tennis Shines off that apple by 40. Oh, yeah, but that's okay You don't enjoy that shit I think and I think we can all get on board with this Is that when you're born you're one? Because you're in the first year Oh, so you're you're talking about centuries versus like 19th century is like the 1800s on right centuries versus hundreds Exactly, it's fucked up that we do that that way, but not our age that way

It is weird to say like oh that baby's zero This how many how much how many years old is your baby? Oh my baby is five months old I didn't ask that They're in their first year. They're one years old. So you are entering your 30th year But they're not one years old. Are they they're in their first year But they're what griffin is arguing is they're you're entering your 30th year. Yes thus begins your 30th Yeah, no, I can see that that's for sure. That's definite. You don't say I have completed my 30th year No, and now I

Right like that's weird. Also. Yeah, I'm beginning my 30th planetary cycle Maybe the partner could be like that's right Oh, yes, I knew this this this information related to me. I was aware of this. It's a year-long party. Oh Yeah You get it. It's like a year-long party. What's that mean juice? Well, the party don't stop The party it's a celebration for you being 30 that's so monumental. Yeah, it has to start It has to start

The at your previous birthday. Okay, it's a year-long multi-tiered Multi-dimensional celebration pitch me a version of this that isn't terrible for me. Okay. Well, no for griffin specific Okay, so you anytime if you imagine your partner is having a birthday and it's a okay And it's like a year-long, right? Yes. So for one year Whenever there's conflict or anything approaching conflict in the relationship You don't have to do the mental calculus of Should I be supporting my partner's needs or should I be looking after my own needs to find that delicate balance? That's key to any relationship. Yeah for one year. You can just relax and really put yourself in the back seat

You know what I mean? There's no nobody could get me guff about it because it's their birthday. It's their birth year Yeah, now it's their birthday celebration. It kind of feels a little bit like what you're saying Justin is like a year-long birthday party But in the sense of like birthday party parentheses observed and parentheses where it doesn't sound like there's a lot of Celebration occurring. There are celebrations throughout but their surprises. Oh, I mean, cool. What do you mean anything? Well, what's cool is like for the whole year you can do whatever shady things you want to do and

If what do you do? Let me finish the thought and your you your partner is like, what are you what have you been doing? You can just be like Coming up on the birthday should be asked some questions. Oh, I see. It's like, why does your trunk smell like that? It's like Birthday boy. Got a birthday. You got a b-day coming up. I thought you were saying birthday birthday blood No, it's promotional for Dexter's back Oh It's a year-long birthday celebration and also That actually what that one I will answer for you. I'm part of a Dexter's back street team

that is promoting Dexter's back So I'm leaving uh, just you know some slides with blood on them all over town Some bloody knives all over town. Just whatever bloody stuff I can find. I leave it all over town Hey, did you fucking kill John Lithgow on our couch? Yeah, I'd said Dexter's uh laboratory Promotional materials. Yeah I haven't seen the show, but it's supposed to be really good and back. So Dexter's back. Yeah, this stinker he He doesn't like murder, which is fucked up, right? Because it's like you do it quite a bit, huh? He's like Kathy, you know where he loves murder

But when he does it, he's like, ah, yeah, sure You know, they're bringing Dexter's back Um, when they do it, he's gonna be on cbs So they've had to tone it down. So really what he does is um, he punches people But he can't let anybody know that he's because he his job is that he's not a punch But he does if he finds a serial killer, whatever, which that guy by the way, I know he's like technically Works at police But like that guy meets so many more serial killers than I do

Just per capita. Well, he's looking for them Justin And I know you well enough to say that you are actively trying to stay away from serial killers It is one of my key concepts for 2021. It's one of your top every year You have the same year's resolution. Avoid more serial serial killers. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, can't be 100% That's where I've been so far. I mean, I assume right. Yeah, I was about to say I didn't want to get too dark But like I don't know you've probably met a serial Well, that's probably met a serial killer. Hey, hey listener Take a second and rewind your whole life and try to figure out like

Have I met at least one serial killer? That's why I have accepted that I can't avoid all serial killers So I just try really hard to make myself not their type You know, I mean, I'm just trying to be like, oh no. No, not Travis though. Just let him get through this thing Okay, so in closing You could just say that you're nervous about turning um 30 in a year Oh, man, it actually I just tried to bring it up in conversation and it doesn't actually Theoretically, it's tough. Hey partner. I heard that you're planning a surprise party for me. I just want to make it clear to you

No, no, no, no, no, no, you've ruined it. You've ruined it. This is a prize party. He's fucking terrible Yeah, no kidding Travis, but we don't get to be the arbiter of that Just let it just do it. It'll be a fun story. Oh, look at that My grandmother confused the months and she sent me a birthday card earlier in here Uh, uh, but as she's written here happy 29th. Thank you grandma. I have a solution to this Your friend ruined the surprise, right? Yep Your friend needs to fix this. Yes If they ruin the surprise your friend needs to go back to him be like, hey, listen

This didn't occur to me before when I it definitely did occur to me and I was just too scared to mention it But like they are turning 29 like there is no reality in which this should be a dirty 30 party fix it Yeah, yeah Make them fix you are right Justin and you should say it I I mean he did just say it. I well, yeah, but I mean that's a I think it's the thing people say Hey, thank you. Uh speaking of um avoiding Getting murdered. Can we approach the wizard because I have more life saving I feel like this segment has stopped being like a humor

column and more like a A slum dog slum dog millionaire like little seeds that I'm planting in the lizard's mind so that when they do face off against a charging ostrich they like Know what to do weirdly like our best chance to actually help. Yeah and like a big in like a really important way Also, our best chance to have somebody like oh, it's a life that Exactly write us into their will or something like that, you know Um, seven like seven or eight people sent this in thank you how to survive an encounter with ostrich

They can be found in the wild on safaris or on ostrich farms. I feel like If you are if you get into this scenario It's mostly on you. I don't typically find myself in places where ostriches Are You know what I mean? They're not the most well Here's the thing. I agree with you Griffin if you go to an ostrich farm and you get attacked But what I'm saying is with zoos and transports and such The chances of an ostrich appearing in my backyard are very very very small but not zero

Yeah, that's fair. I guess you know what I mean? We got the Cincinnati zoo right here Yeah, one could escape one could escape. I'm not saying that it has please don't freak out everyone in the Cincinnati area But I'm saying you'd oh you'd know Oh, yeah, so monkey's got away here recently and it was a huge news story. Is that true? Yeah, there was another wiki how article people sent in about how to survive a monkey attack Maybe we'll do that one. Maybe we'll do that one next time But I feel like the ostrich is scarier because guess what I'm gonna just start reading about method one evading and charging ostrich Look for cover because these motherfuckers can run up to 43 miles an hour

That's that's going fast It's so fast. That's quite fast. You got you got those weird legs. So how do they do that? Yeah, it's it's I yeah, I don't even think about it the ostrich's body is in like the road runners legs Yes, exactly. They go they windmill Uh, you got to get somewhere that they is going to just break their break their stride Um, they're so much faster than you and they'll kick you in the back and then you're pretty much dead hide Yeah, conceal yourself ostrich fast Pretty stupid. So you got that going for you at least another thing ostrich can't do is fly get up a tree

That's okay. If you fly away, you're fine. If you fly away, it's fine ostrich can stand up to seven and nine feet tall So make it a big tree It doesn't have teeth That's a bonus it can jab at you with its beak and upset your balance and once you get into foot town Once you hit foot range of the ostrich, that's the ball game Here's a fun one dive into a thorn bush It sucks. It sucks. You know what else being is it sucks getting disemboweled by an ostrich Jump right in a thorn bush and ostrich will be like, uh, no, that's no, thanks

Just a quicker one. I think sometimes we uh, we people who are not around ostriches routinely Try to think of them as a little bit doofy um, but as you've been um Describing the ostrich. I'm reminded that uh birds will fall from, you know dinosaurs. Oh for sure for sure for sure Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah And the last thing to do if just all else fails you can't get up a tree or hide or whatever just lay on the ground Um, and you think like oh, it's just gonna leave you alone No, it's gonna still beat the shit out of you

But it's gonna be apparently a little bit better because the force of an ostrich's kick is dramatically reduced when you lay down, right? Because they kick forward and then downwards. So, you know, they the they are going to scratch your it says lay in your stomach to protect your organs I don't really know how to prioritize Them when i'm doing that But then guess if you're worried about disembowelment, that's gonna be tummy area That's gonna be as tummy town and also hey, um You're also not safe from the ostrich sitting on you because these bad boys can weigh between 200 and 350 pounds Fucking fuck. Wow

So that's how to evade an ostrich. So big There's gotta be a fight on how to calm them down, right? Well, no actually before that travis step two is a section That is it features some of the wildest illustrations That i've ever seen uh on I was gonna say on wiki how but really In any sort of format Um, and it's how to uh fend off an ostrich how to battle

How to battle a ostrich, uh wait in the avoiding damage section Does it mention that you should stop carrying ground its giant egg like an old timey fuck ball guy? Is that I feel like gets you in trouble a lot or on top of your head like mario too Yeah, they hate both of those because you seem like you are gonna drop it. I'm just uploading some cool pictures of people, uh Hitting an ostrich with a big stick. Okay, so you find a long weapon. Not a close quarters one because boy out of context This is terrible You gotta get a lot. No, there's nothing funny about hurting animals unless it's a life or death situation You gotta stay to the ostrich's side with your long weapon and these images a person is holding a long stick like a kendo stick

their form is impeccable to be honest Um, and then it just has this is like this is like the scene in signs where he just swings away Right, but it's like if it's like his sister-in-law just kept saying like hey when that ostrich comes around Um, Billy or whatever swing away the wiki how article here has literally Demonstrated the glowing weak points on the ostrich. There's neck. That's the weakest part of the ostrich clearly I don't think you need to wait if you are in this situation and you're like, okay I have fuck. I don't know what paths I followed to get me here

But I'm about to fight this ostrich with a big stick Where am I gonna aim this thing if you if you don't jump to neck if you don't jump to that long beautiful graceful powerful, but Somewhat fragile neck like what else what are you gonna do? That could be a trick though You know where you look at you know like I bet that's the lead point and it's like a ha ha idiot Yeah, I've evolved to have like an iron neck. Yeah, well should have gone for my butt There's more tips here actually the next thing in the order It says here if the ostrich refuses to give up despite your attacks to its neck aim for its wings when given the opportunity If the ostrich refuses to give up after you struck it in the neck with a big stick several times

Yeah, it is give it give yourself to it. Yeah feed yourself to it You've clearly done something that has like done a kill bill style life Die with war and oath on you. This is the only thing you have left now is you get to choose to die with honor to this Yes, allow the ostrich to five finger death punch you or whatever and then you slowly walk away into the sunset The ostrich will nod to you knowingly and one warrior to another before it eviscerates you It'll give you a chance to straighten your tie before ripping your guts out Isn't that better though? Then you like swinging this stupid stick after you'd have you struck it and it's beautiful powerful neck

And it's not phased by it and you're like And then you get murdered no Go for the legs anything after the neck attack is like completely excessive. You are not gonna reach out You guys agree that like if I just in macaroy At this point in my life in the victim of an ostrich attack It's a societal problem. Okay, there's been an a systemic Something has gone horribly wrong. Yeah infrastructure has Failed me. It can't be my fault

That i'm getting attacked by an ostrich because like the people that have ostriches and the people that are charged with looking after my welfare should have collaborated To keep me from this situation. There should be yes There should be lines of defense between you and ostrich and if those have fallen apart There are larger issues at play here. Yeah. Yes. Yeah, I understand if I am killed by an ostrich I want there to be like an investigation And like I want aoc to open up an investigation in congress like how do we fail our boy so bad? How do we let this happen to our boy?

Now my worry is that if those lines have broken down as jesson suggests and I get killed as an ostrich I might not even make the news No, right if if that is like an et cetera of like horrible stuff has happened C page 10 flip flip flip travis macaroy was killed terrible news tonight as the brother of the guy that uploaded berries I The only things that are left is there's two different tips saying stay the fuck away from ostriches And then there's one extra one that says stay the fuck away from ostriches, especially during breeding season Oh, yeah, I know when that is yep

If I knew what ostrich breeding season was I've probably been smart enough to avoid putting myself in this scenario Well, if you see the ostrich and they're like Like get out of there get out of there. That's weird. I smell I smell feathers and axe body spray Oh, no But no, we're in there griffin. Is it how to calm down the ostrich? No, your options are Stay away The order of this article is so fucking weird because it's like hide Run away if that doesn't work

If that doesn't work fucking hit it with a stick and it's glowing weak points But for real though, you should probably just stay away from these guys I like this idea that the ostrich is like a destiny to like boss fight of like yeah aim for the glowing spots. Yeah They are really giving this ostrich the business It's three different people in these big shoes, too The shakes it looks like it's three people ganging up and like you take the neck I'll take the wing. It's like the printer's seeing an office space, but with an ostrich instead That's horrible. They should be arrested. They should and the ostrich too just for questioning at least

Yeah, well for its own protection really Though this world isn't built for an ostrich. It's not the ostrich's fault that it got out here and panicked Try I mean it's an ostrich's world. We're all just living in it No, I agree with you griffin if I run into the ostrich on its native like habitat But if an ostrich gets out of the Cincinnati zoo and finds itself like in otr or whatever and it freaks out Everyone has to accept that like fuck. Yeah, that ostrich freaked out. It doesn't understand any of this Why why why is the parking so expensive? How come the restaurants are also small? Why is there a 45 minute wait right like that kind of shit?

It runs up on me and a trader joes And I'm like you're in my world now Welcome to my world And you hit it with a baguette and then I get a bright with a baguette right in the face Get with a baguette griffin now you want to do another question, but uh, unfortunately I don't It's better with you This podcast is sponsored by better help

Let me ask you guys a question So there's something interfering with your happiness or preventing you from achieving your goals Hmm, well Yeah, how long do you have so much so much stuff travis. Holy shit Okay, well, I don't have a lot of time because I had to get back to making this show But if you guys need to talk with somebody better help will assess your needs waiting for you to offer me Oh, you oh, I thought no, this is an ad. Oh, this is an ad regiffin, but I I No, it's it's uncomfortable. Okay. I meet with a professional therapist on a regular basis and it has changed my life

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Who have taken charge of their mental health with the help of an experienced professional In fact, so many people have been using better help that they are recruiting additional therapists in all 50 states So one more time that special offer for mbm listeners get 10% off your first month at better help dot com slash my brother Come and knock on our door We got spaghetti for you That's a good idea for you coming these buffalo wings and a little bit of Dairy free ice cream from the store And a hairbrush and a hairbrush. Maybe if they sell hair brushes at the grocery store. Hey doordash

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Delivered in under an hour with the contactless delivery drop-off setting for a limited time Our listeners can get 25 off and zero delivery fees on their first order of 15 bucks or more When you download the door dash app and enter code mabin bam That's 25 off up to $10 value and zero delivery fees on your first order when you download the door dash app and the app store And you enter mabin bam as the code don't forget that's code mabin bam for 25 off your first order with door dash subject change terms apply All right, and just to be clear app is short for application there not apple If you're sick of constantly arguing with the people closest to you about topics that really aren't going to change the world We're here to take that stress off of your shoulders. We take care of it for you on we got this with mark and hal

That's right hal if you have a subjective question that you want answered objectively Once and for all time for all of the people of the world Questions like who's the best disney villain mac or pc or should you put ketchup on a hot dog? That's why we're here. Yes. I get that these are the biggest question of our time And we're often joined by special guests like nathan filian or lando jones and pageant bruster So let mark and hal take care of it for you on we got this with mark and hal weekly on maximum fun Okay I want a munch

Welcome munch squad the podcast within a podcast profiling the latest grace of brand eating there is a I mean everyone decided to just Like jack it back up Like the munch my thing today that i'm going to say to you is the munch is back because people are going wild Do you think they were were they waiting this could be where we saw started to see like You remember when it seemed like cove was going away and we saw the push into Like some of them like travel and some of those other sectors And then it seemed like delta was like back and then it's like maybe the stay at home brands are where we want to keep

The bulk of our sort of interests. Yeah, sure. Sure. Yeah, I think this is kind of where we're at right now where it's like This is a flush of people thinking like Time to get nasty again. You know what I mean But the chicken sandwich where it's also sucked a lot of the oxygen out of the room Yeah, well guess who's trying to start it back up and you're fucking kidding me Taco bell what? Taco bell is unleashing and it says unleash and they know They know they're unleashing the crispy chicken sandwich

Talk no already. No Nationwide on september 2nd. You can't just do that You the words mean something taco bell beginning september 2nd taco bell is long awaited Crispy chicken sandwich taco will be available nationwide at participating locations for a limited time not quite a sandwich Not quite a taco. It doesn't have to explain itself. It does After locally testing earlier this year in Nashville and charlotte to much success The test kitchen masterminds knew it was time to go nationwide Pull the trigger. It's fluffy. Okay, wait a minute. Wait a minute. Sorry. We've talked about this before in episode 550

We talked about this Yes, my friend. Yes This is now nationwide that we have not talked about The the fat wait 550. Yeah, bud. Yeah, this was the test. That was the test. It's it's here It's not fluffy like a sandwich, but folded like it. It's fluffy like a sandwich. Yeah But it's folded like a taco. Mm-hmm No Now I stand by I think what my position back then looking at a picture of these bad boys now, which is that I would fuck them up proper

I'm looking at it again. I'm getting hungry. I would ruin these bad boys The crispy chicken sandwich taco is a taco or a sandwich Might just be the greatest debate of recent time. Oh, yeah It might just be according to this press release in 2021 Whether this is a taco or a sandwich might just be The greatest debate of recent time And that's why Taco Bell has enlisted some of the brightest minds in the country to help fans James Carville

Now now listen It's me Ben Shapiro It's a me It's a Identity politics I mean Shapiro, I would need now back to my toilet where I live You didn't need to be some way of saying that it's a I need to find some way of saying it's a taco that reveals like Is also the most brutal self-demolishing own possible because that is his brand is like trying to chuck what he like

He does an airball and then it bounces off the rim and gives him a concussion. Um So It's gotta be a taco because when I ate it, I got diarrhea for six hours. That only happens when I eat tacos Right, uh, that's right on september 4th Taco Bell will use two real college debate teams from the university of georgia and climson university to go head to head In the name of team. It's a sandwich and team. It's a taco. Oh boy In a third team The great christmas chicken sandwich taco debate will air saturday september 4th

During the georgia versus climson prime time college football game on mbc Oh record numbers. It's it's What they have done here is they have wandered into the chicken sandwich wars That is what bothers me. Yes. And and while everybody else is like, uh, a new opponent a new contender enters the battlefield But taco bell is like hold up Because we have our own drama that we need to like Figure out first, please don't don't go on the attack Nobody else is allowed to announce a chicken taco until we figure out this

Shit and do some real soul searching. It's like it's like you can't decide if it's a taco or it's a it's a sandwich Okay, well one of them Will enter you into will thrust you into an international Conflict that has I will reiterate for maybe the dozenth time claimed human life so Again I feel like i'm losing it with this thing

But people have done right okay. It's not a joke One of them enters you into that the other one is like, I don't know. It's another bad taco. We did it or like It'll still be good. I mean bad in the sense that like It's not a it's not a taco, but it's stop I just want to you just no no no travis. It's important that we take a beat here And appreciate what justin just did which is Oh, I tried to like you threw your hat in the ring a little bit

I threw my hat there, right? I mean, but it ain't a sandwich either ask hodgeman That somebody get a hodgeman on the phone and ask you what this is. They want hodgeman, though They want hodgeman for free juice and we're knocking it like that I'm gonna get i'm gonna text it don't I just don't know how I feel about the fact that We've been doing munch quad now for a long time and it's reached a point where The fact that taco bell has enlisted human beings and let's human youths To debate whether a thing they made Is a taco or a sandwich on live television? They should know yeah

I don't know what you're asking me right It should bother me But instead I'm just left empty inside and thinking like well. Yep. This is where we are Where was this indecisiveness when they announced the naked chicken taco where the chicken was the Was the the shell the tortilla. Oh, they knew what they were doing. They made that they made that fucking Monstrosity and they were like this ladies and gentlemen this folks

This is definitely a taco Right here Well, just while we're here I just want to mention a couple of other things and I don't want to like Outstay my welcome here with munch squad, but there's a lot going on. Okay Sonic is doing a lineup of wine inspired slush. Fuck. Yes. Excellent. Love that fantastic Boos free. Well, it's that thing of like I want to capture the The feeling of drinking frozen wine that doesn't get me dry. Yeah, I love that. I love that stinky fruit flavor

They got strawberry frosse Redberry sangria and peach bellini. That's not going to get confusing Oh when people see that Well, why would it be confusing? It's just it's a peach bellini That doesn't have the alcohol in it. I mean, yeah, definitely. It's a sangria Uh, which I believe is only a term used for for the alcoholic drink, right? Not that It's not that one. No And then I did want to I just have one other thing to talk to you guys about and that's that pumpkin

Month. Hell yeah, it's it's coming up Starbucks just decided to pop it off august 24th, which I think is ridiculous We are a month away from calendar fall and a week away from justin fall And I I don't think that this is the appropriate time. I think you need to start wait till the beginning of justin fall Or calendar you can do it as soon as august 15th says incorrect Fall september 1st. Nope. August 15th That's a back to school season

No one cares. Nobody cares. Well, PS PSL. Hey just for fun. Yeah, how many PSLs you guys think starbucks is sold since 2003? 1 billion Okay, I'll say uh 600 million Wow 500 million excellent job. Thank you. I still went over and lost. Yeah, he was over by 20% just and that's not that good Last year if you'll remember starbucks had a 1 800 number. Do you guys remember this where you could call? Oh, I remember. Yes. Of course pumpkin jokes or something Uh today. There is a this year. We got a pumpkin lovo meter

It's a quiz and we're gonna find out where you guys fall who wants to say I do different of Travis. Please me me me Oh, perfect. Here we go Which which would you get for a first tattoo trap a heart shaped pumpkin? What uh-huh Okay, a heart shape. Yeah, you know pumpkin in the shape of a heart A PSL on your tongue so you can always taste it A pumpkin cream cold brew goes here on your palm Or a full flannel sleeve. Oh

Please try to answer honestly. Uh, I think of those four full flannel sleeve Okay, that would be uh, it seems like all those would be something that a pumpkin fan would do What would you do if your significant other proposed with a pumpkin cream cold brew? Fuck would you would you take the drink and run? Would you say yes immediately? Pumpkin is my significant. Oh, wow or post a photo in the leaf rakers society asap Huh, I think I'd take the drink and run would be my honest answer It seems like it

I kind of thought this would be about like how much do you like pumpkin Jeff, what's the first thing you do after arriving at a pumpkin patch? Oh take a shit Pumpkin patch photo shoot give him pumpkin Wait, what is that a separate answer? Patch photo shoot See me call it give him pumpkin to talk. I was so worried that that was a separate answer Pumpkin patch photo shoot comma Give him pumpkin to talk about calm. Okay. It says this. It's a semi-colon actually pumpkin patch foot, which I don't think it's

Being appropriately used here, but whatever it's a it's a it's a it's a ai cloud generated quiz spend hours hunting for the perfect pumpkin hours hunting for the perfect pumpkin um Grab as many pumpkins as you can fit into your car and then some so I don't you tell me what that fucking means Shatter my car's windows with the pressure the internal pressure. I'm gonna duct tape them to the top, right? And then this was probably the wildest one of all Get your pumpkins and go. Wow. Okay. That's awesome

So what this is implying is a very uh mechanical very austere pumpkin patch. Yeah, yeah dutifully Yes, this is the pumpkin. No no more chat I'm leaving now to return I'll be honest fellas. Is this hard for me to move on from give them pumpkin to talk about I mean, that's the answer pumpkin to talk about is really good. But Travis, it's your quiz I wanted to reflect you as a person if I get the first thing I do when I get to a pumpkin patch I'm taking some photos for the gram to give them pumpkin to talk about of course. That's actually probably true Something to talk about by bonnie ray is a song about people

Spreading rumors that you and somebody else is is is our lovers Yes, so it oh so griffin are you saying that this is implying that I'm taking this photo shoot and people are gonna say like Is Travis fucking that pumpkin? I think it looks like in this picture. He's fucking the pumpkin. Yeah, that's what I do Yeah, maybe american pumpkin. I think Travis is trying to recreate. I think Travis, please dig in that pumpkin Would you ever name your pet pumpkin? Yeah I already did brb changing their name My pet is a pumpkin. No fourth answer provided. Oh boy

So here's the Again, would you name your pet pumpkin? I already did brb changing their name My pet is a pumpkin. How are you supposed to judge your pumpkin love with these options? Yeah, where's the fourth one? Like hypothetically, I would if that name fit with that particular pet if it's like seemed like a good name for I I guess my answer would be of those three Uh brb obviously change your name Would you rather let a stranger hold your psl or hold your baby?

No third or fourth options provided Um, I guess the answer would be that I'd let them hold my psl because if they ran away with that It's a lot easier to replace. Sure. Wait, is psl penis leash? Yeah Okay, wait, what what's the s for there, drustin? penis I Do you want to let them hold your psl or your baby? Oh, well, that is definitely my psl if that's the case Because why else have it? Why else would I have it?

You're not gonna hold your own. No. Sleesh. That's perverted. Why would I have that? It's for other people To hold p o v p o v You're lost in the corn maze. Yeah How are you getting out? This one's an essay answer Yeah, right the plan your plan your route. I'm probably not getting out tbh or follow the smell of penis leash Your starbucks. Well, I'm not a defeatist. So I guess I'm going to go with penis leash here

When the real answer the third one would be just start charging forward through the corn. It's corn What pumpkin item would we most likely find in your closet and it says no judgment? Oh, wait um A pair of shoes carved from actual pumpkins. Oh Pumpkin fashion isn't my passion A pumpkin onesie Or a vintage pumpkin patchwork jacket. Oh, it's the vintage pumpkin patchwork jacket There needs to be more options in this quiz. That's like, I don't actually really like the pumpkin spice. That's what the second one is

The second one was like, no, you know what on second thought? I know I've made it pretty far through this quiz But actually fuck pumpkins and not in a fun way This is the last one. Okay, trav you make your way to the pumpkin prom What move are you busting out? An organized fall flash mob A series of perfect pumpkin pirouettes Uh the pop lock and pumpkin Not my style

I'll be by the pumpkin punch. It's that one not my style. I'll be by the pumpkin punch ball Uh, because if I'm being honest, I was always a little nervous at dances. Uh, but I did love punch The results are in Travis You are a secret pumpkin admirer Okay, this is the second to least you can like The second to least you can like pumpkins is secret pumpkin admirer Even though you don't fully embrace the pumpkin loving lifestyle

It's hard to ignore that tingly feeling you get inside whenever you get your hands on one Again, by that we mean a pumpkin get your hands on a pumpkin and you tingle Don't worry. We won't tell if you don't want us to it can be our little Pumpkin spice fills you can cook that pumpkin until the cows come home and we're gonna keep it quiet here at starbucks TM that that is until you share this with your followers, then it just says you can share now Uh, what is the least you can like pumpkin there? Well, travel it's a scientific quiz. I can't just move the needle to where it points Yeah, I would just love it if like the least option is just like well you fucking got us

Well, hey, we got caramel macchiato still whatever you hate this shit come in for a plain black coffee. Okay Um, so anyway, that's the bunch quad Do we want to do one other question real quick? Yeah, okay I was recently able to order one of the new xbox nice Nice nice during checkout the estimated arrival was sometime in the middle of next week great I recently got an email that shipping had been expedited And it would now be arriving this saturday also great right wrong saturday is my fiance's birthday

How can I avoid explaining to my fiance that I bought myself a new present for her birthday? Some additional context something similar happened last year We're ended up buying myself a new bicycle on her birthday. I don't know how this keeps happening Conflicted about cortana in kentucky. Well, I You hide and lie and that's not a bad that's not a terrible one to do It's a lie and you're significant out there on the spectrum of Of fibs is you know hiding away squirreling away your xbox for a couple days To make it seem like it arrived when it was supposed to arrive. That's a victimless crime

But if you don't want to do that, I do think you just got to get a better present Than the xbox like a position five and good fucking luck because I mean Master chief blinks the time sweeper Banjo kazooie. It's like how are you gonna beat you can't beat that's the that's the dream team right there You can't beat that At this point pretty soon you're gonna be married right at which point 50% of your stuff will be theirs anyways legally So just give them the xbox Like

That's that seems bad though. It's like I know you won't like this as much as me but here it is It's a gift for you Now here's the problem. Okay. Here's the problem question asker Is that a year ago you preemptively fucked this up by getting yourself a bike on their birthday that you could have easily not done Now this Is happening. You're gonna have to give that xbox away to me as punishment. Damn. Well, here's the other thing I was gonna say question asker and I don't want to be serving down down or but maybe just cancel shipment because there ain't no games

Oh, damn true. Damn juice I hate to bring it like this to be kind of sony crony right now with very no games There's no games. That's sony. There's no games. Sonny. We got them all Uh, sony's got them all Crash for xbox. They're eight. They don't have crash. No crash. Bam to coot on that one or gex Is the term sony crony because I've always used like i'm a bro for sony and just said like i'm a brony Is that not no? No, that's not the one you could be a sony crony or a sony

sony, uh What's the one you always it's sony pony. Oh, that may be just be one griffin sense See that's so weird because I've actually combined it when I said i'm a brony pony. Is that bad? No, that's good. That's a good thing No, it's good. Okay. It's a good name Uh, this it just and i'm someone who loves xbox. So i've also also just said i'm a sexbox Yeah, maybe you could try to do like Oh Man, I won the contest. Yes

Maybe like I won the contest. I entered. Okay, wait for xbox. There is a way This is gonna sound manipulative. I just did it. Of course. There's a way. I think you spend some time on this contest victory this good stuff There's just i'm just saying you want a contest. I did hands on i did hands on a hard body win. Um Over overnight Yeah, other people did a bad job I thought it would take way longer. I thought remember the other day when I was gone for 20 minutes That was it. It was a hands on a hard body. It lasted 20 minutes. They filled the fucking room with scorpions

And you know me. I think I think they're cute. I think they're neat. So uh easy xbox Godgex is so cool You can't just drop that on me. Thanks for listening to our podcast. We hope you enjoyed yourself We certainly appreciated you uh hanging out with us. We love to have we love to have you around I'll just I'll say that's very nice. Justin We love having um, I want everyone to know uh, if you're listening to this on monday You got two more days to grab our pen of the month, which is work of fart benefiting one tree planted Uh, we've also got some pixel art stickers of us on there, which are available individually or as a set

Uh, the stickers will still be there come the new month, but that pen will be gone and Just a little uh sneak preview starting on wednesday. Uh, there's some really really good stuff in there Uh, so go check that out at macroemerge.com And of course we want to thank montane for the use of our theme song My life is better with you if you haven't checked out, uh, that I would say super fun music video for that song It's available on our youtube channel. Uh, just search macroi family on youtube and it's all there Thanks to max fun our podcast home Check out all the other macroi shows at macroi.family

Griffin, do you have a final yahoo for us? Yeah, uh, this final yahoo. Thanks everybody for listening. This final yahoo was sent in by uh, rond Excuse rond And it's at it's asked rond and it's asked by yahoo answers user Jeffy from family circus

Who asks? Who asks? Mm-hmm. Yeah Oh You haven't so digital static. Oh on the website. Yeah, I'm having a lot of technical static on my hate that Yeah, I try adjusting uh, the the knobs Try adjusting let me yeah adjust the contrast Try the vertical and the horizontal

Yeah, oh, I got it now Uh, so this is Jeffy from family circus who asks No, check the antenna Try rebooting it real quick do a quick reboot put some foil on the top. Oh, okay Jeffy from family circus asks, um I found a gun Uh-oh I don't think so. I don't think that's what the question was. Did you try that again, Griffin?

It's Jeffy from family circus says I found a gun. Uh-oh No, it's not that do a refresh. Do I give it to my mom and dad or my ghost grandparents? That's from Jeffy of family circus a kid. You got to give it to somebody dangerous Okay, I was not correct. I'm Griffin Mackerel. This has been my brother my brother me gets your dad's square on the lips Oh It's better. It's better with you It's better. It's better with you. This is true

It's better. It's better with two Oh It's better with you Maximum fun org comedy and culture artist owned audience supported