My Brother, My Brother And Me - MBMBaM 584: Three Hunky Guys Podcast

Episode Date: November 1, 2021

Welcome to MBMBaM: Revelations. Our most embarrassing secrets, revealed - some new, some old. Tough-guy affectations! Questionable fashion choices! Attempted nicknames!Suggested talking points: Oops All Justins, Have You Talked to St Paul? He eats Board Wax, Goth or JK Simmons, Jimmy Buffet Blood Transfusion, The Passionate KissburgerThe Kissburger commercial: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=auPnjF4V4_kSupport AAPI communities and those affected by anti-Asian violence: https://www.gofundme.com/c/act/stop-aapi-hate For resources on anti-racism and fighting police violence: https://blacklivesmatters.carrd.co/

The McElroy brothers are not experts and their advice should never be followed Travis insists. He's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mentioned only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening What's up, you cool, baby I could have never seen what was coming for me hangs at the skate park hangs by the beach my life It feels It's better it's better It's better it's better

It's better it's better Hello everybody and welcome to my brother my brother me and it's an advice show for the modern era And we're oldest brother Justin McElroy. I'm your middlest brother Travis McElroy. Yep. I'm your sweet, baby, brother Oh, I got big dog woof woof. Okay. Oh, it's broken the curse is broken Oh Now that we finally hit the year and we've actually in a year about a dog with no bones And we really fucking nailed it and then there I go forget. Oh, okay That's okay, but you can never say it again that era. I'll find something different. Yeah, so I was listening to endless

I don't want to Promote on another podcast because as everyone knows all comp podcasts are competing all the time. That's right. We'll call it Schmed schmies on yeah, I'm dumb with Schmoner Schmatliff, right? Yeah, that is actually Yeah, you know, it's what you're talking about. Yeah, the podcast that eyes and there was an episode where they talked about like child actors Right who had played the younger versions of Tom Hanks Movie and it got me thinking that a lot of people talk about like if they made a movie about your life Who would play you and people always think about like younger actors or like actors their same age but I want to ask you guys because I

think The next move the next big step in like biopic or biopic Movies used to make movies about people who are still alive But what we think they're gonna do when they get older, right? So kind of a future channel nonfiction Yes, and so who would you want to play you as an older? Like if they made a movie about you right now But yeah, like 75 looking about all the awesome shit you did in the next like 40 years, right? Who would be irritated by the fact that this has come like it's actually a pretty good idea. Hey, thank you

It's like just but I don't think it I always get like I feel like there's a level of idea That's like podcast good. You know what I mean where it's like we can just kind of dump it out here. Oh Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's what that's out of the moving car. Yeah, I mean it's gotta be her camera Wow Controversial pick Griffin. I don't know. I don't know. I don't like the guy. I yeah, I find I find I love him. I love it It's so funny. You look at it. You're like, yeah, sure griffin He was funny and growing pains. It's like no this dude says Really funny shit all the time. Yeah, he's Andy Kaufman level ass committed to this weird character He's been playing so into it

Even his even his sister can't as Karen's like anyway, you guys know my dumb shit, bro She's also kind of in on the joke though, huh a little bit. She's got it on that a little bit See, I was thinking for me and maybe this is just wishful thinking but I really think he and I share the same energy I'm just gonna say Brian Cox because I think when you see Brian Cox you think like that's an old Travis McRoy but like I said, maybe that's wishful thinking and and It's probably not that is it. No, it's probably no Fisher Stevens might be a good Travis. Here's the thing that with this yeah Travis is I could say literally anything I could say literally anyone because who the fuck knows what I'm gonna get up to in 40 years

Well, but at this point Griffin, I mean you're what you're 34 at this point Yeah, and so I think you have you can look at yourself at like 12 and see the progression of 22 years So I think you could right now say like I think at 56 we've aged your baby to an adult And this is what we think he'll look like kind of thing. You know what I mean? Yeah So I think you can probably extrapolate where you're gonna be No, I don't think so, but I think her camera is a good start Okay, bold a bold choice Justin

hmm Justin McRoy type. I'm trying to figure out who's got like the heat Justin McRoy Energy, you know. Yeah Who's like my I get sort of like I mean Who's like got a Justin like who's got like a genuine Like I feel like everybody's saying deaf Patel So like a Justin McRoy Energy that the I'm not sure

Sexuality handsomeness Sir like Sort of like a dev Patel In there is one problem Justin. I'm not sure he's older than you I think that's the one issue that I'm having with that casting Travis. He is an actor This is true. He can play age Now Justin if I might take you to Kumail Manjulani like body. Yeah, like more of a Kumail body with like a dev Patel face

Yeah, no, I see that sexuality and chemistry and like handsomeness and stuff and now Justin I'm just gonna throw this out and this is a bit of a different Direction than dev Patel, but you know if we could get streep that almost guarantees an oscar You know what I mean get that oscar buzz going if we could get streep Yeah, um, it would be great if what a challenge for her. I know what a yeah, what a departure You know streep if you want to do something that's going to get people talking, you know, I mean, yeah Because you'll have to really dig deep to find the charisma within her to match your energy, right? Yeah, I kind of a dev Patel level energy and sexuality with us. Do like what was that?

What was the uh, uh Bob Dylan movie where like they had multiple actors play him we could do that with you Oh rams wonder and porium Exactly the magical the magical boat of dr. Parnassus exactly a very good act kind of thing because it's just called doctor No, I think it's called sky captain in the world of tomorrow But I think we could get because I would like to see I here's here's the lineup I think you go glen close then you go streep Then you go glen close and streep together like true west and how you like trade it off

And then you go a dev Patel and then you're gonna bring it back Uh, like who's a hot child star right now? You know, we're gonna have like uh, like yeah, Nicky We get limnicky in there. Maybe a timid timothe shall we we get all of them in and they but here's the thing They're all talking to each other. It's all just it's oops all just all just that's cool That's cool What would be really cool is if in 40 years the thing justin's best known for is not these podcasts But that like I don't know he invents Uh

A hat that smells good. So when you come out of the bathroom, you don't have a bathroom smell behind you You wear you wear like you're you're good smelling bathroom hat And then you get glen close out there like it's my bathroom hat And you're like is that actually justin or I'm confused. Is this one of those CGI things? What is hard is like the best chance I have of being depicted in the film at this point. Yeah Is if somebody does a berries and cream movie Okay, that's my best shot to get into a movie. I feel like a just a macro character

into a movie like Okay, see for me I think the best hope of getting a Travis macro biopic is probably some kind of whimsical but Definitely still like fairly serious crime spree Where it's just like Where people are trying to understand like where it all went wrong kind of thing, but also I have a certain Charisma much like, uh, you know that movie where it would they were robbing banks, but everybody seemed to like them a lot You know that one. Oh, sure. Sure. Yeah with that jazz musician Bruno. Yeah. Yeah, um, I would

I feel like there's also a decent chance I might be very briefly depicted in if they did rocket boys again The west virginia guys that did rockets if they did rocket boys again And that the end they wanted to be like and there's still people in west virginia today. It was just like me kind of like Yeah, oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. I'm here too There's actually a very good chance, you know That there will be A biopic of like lin that we might be depicted in and if that happens

And lin you're like you have any voice in it. Please make sure it's just three really ripped dudes full eight jacked Like six foot eight like hunks. You know what I mean? Right because you want it to be accurate. Hunky hunky guys We're three hunky guys and we do a podcast together. What kind of podcast you ask? Well, it's weird that you just started listening side unseen, but like Hey, good. Good. Appreciate it. Maybe it was just on maybe somebody's sitting in the tire disc counter. It's like waiting room right now It's playing. Yeah, they don't have their headphones on they're just playing it to switch from the view to our podcast

Yeah, it's streaming to their television or something. Welcome advice. It's an advice. Why isn't there a podcast channel? Come on. Come on Come on There's lots of channels, you know Yeah, right almost too many sometimes we're scrolling through there and I'm like, what's what's all this? There's like eight hreos. You know the chills. I like on tv I don't have them anywhere. I don't figure at least I is a music choice Oh, I like that there's a where your tv's like I could play music. It's like I know tv

Yeah, can you can you play whatever song I want? Um, no, I can come match a five But you want to feel like some weather channel jazz. Yeah, yeah Actually, I do but without all the trouble of the weather being there also. Yeah Um, I work for the us snowboard team. Hell. Yeah My role in short is to use wax to make the boards go fast like in, um, christmas vacation Oh, for sure. So you know what I mean when you use is a non-nutrient varnish. Yeah My job is inherently nerdy and I'm sounds cool to me. Yeah, I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. It's pretty fucking cool If that's if that's nerdy

Then I'm I'm I'm a thousand percent that minkus. Yeah, I just got a Uh, uh, my job is inherently nerdy and I am spending time with a lot of rad athletes who do rad stunts I don't like dangerous stunts. How do we come rad? That's from paul and saint paul. Well, that's a good hook Yeah, yeah, I think right there. I think when I first read this question What hit me paul if I may I think that you have won a fundamental misunderstanding of what is rad Yeah, um, but your view has been skewed. Yes, but you got too close Like icarus, you know, I mean like you got too close to to true coolness And you've kind of lost perspective a little bit. Right. Yeah, right, right, right, right, right

Like this is like I bet that there are top level like high school varsity baseball players that like look at You know people in the mlb and they're like, I'll never be that well here I am looking at you varsity player thinking I'll never be that so don't you worry about it But I I also think paul what you have to understand is these snowboarders This is their day-to-day right there. They are so used to doing dangerous stunts and seeing other people do dangerous stunts I don't think that counts as rad to them anymore Well, when you start talking about this cool board wax that you use And how the science works on it. That's what's gonna blow them away

They that that's what's going to be impressive to them or You're gonna have to get good at rad stunts. It's one of those two. I don't you don't want to do that That's not rad to them. What you know, I mean, you know, if I could suggest one quick thing You should start going by st paul. That's pretty good. That's cool, right? That is your name's paul just start getting people to call you st paul That's cool. That might be misleading though just in for people who first meet st paul That it might be like it's like a hood. It's sticky. I want to know everything about this. Yeah. Yeah for sure Who is it? Yeah, but what if they're really a saint? What if they get sainted later because of like cool wax miracles?

This is easy. This is easy st st paul. Um, I think in high school You know who was cool Not not me, but follow me. Um, okay all the all the athletes Yeah, but who was second coolest? Finger kids not not the equipment. Fuck. No, not the equipment manager. I kind of said it with my fingers crossed I was really hoping But it was the kid at the lunch table who would eat anything you can put in this cup for one dollar Ah, so cool for all the right reasons too, right?

And so if just sometimes while you're waxing their boards and they're like definitely micromanaging like did you wax the the middle? You just scoop some of that wax up and you just take a big bite out of it And they're like hold what the holy shit? Did you just eat some of that wax and it's like, yeah, I did Why do you think i'm so good at this me and the wax are one and they're like, well, have you talked to st paul? He eats board wax. You got to see that When you said the sentence have you talked to st paul he eats board wax Did you realize that you had absolutely deep six this human being like you have absolutely lowered their stock

I don't think no no no because then that kid eats that kid eats paste that kid eats board wax. They are too Awesome, and they started calling themselves st paul Right, that's actually that me. Is that because of all the board wax they've been eating? Yeah, he's hallucinating. Yeah a little bit By the way, I never saw anybody eat paste my entire You know school career But if I did I would want to know more about that person Because that's a yes griffin, but not I think once again you are only thinking about the interest, but not Perhaps the

Kind of interest you would yeah, it would be a really quick like hey unless you're eating paste like yeah, i'm coming pervert It's like, oh my god I don't think that you would have a moment of like i'm interested in this kid on a really deep spiritual level I think it doesn't have to be interested in a spiritual. We're just trying to be cool and kind of mysterious But not eating. I feel like eating things you're not supposed to eat is not it's rarely like cool It's not cool unless you like unless one thing that I try to jump you can't write hop skip and jump over and unless like that unless unless when I was in

Middle school and high school more high school. I think for like a year. So I tried to be cool by having a habit of Keeping a thumbtack in my mouth remember this, huh? You guys remember this move? Unfortunately, I do I did I would like have a thumbtack in my mouth like the pointy side out right and I would have like Chew on the plastic in and that's uh, that's bonkers juicer Yeah I wish I hadn't said it now. At least it's just between us three. Yeah Yeah, it's just like it was a I don't mind to be open about the ways in which I tried and failed

To be cool. Be cool. Look cool. Be cool. Seem cool. Sound cool at cool Not any of it. Really. Yeah, because it worked out, you know, yeah inspirationally. Sure Um, I really really killed the mode there. Well, it's a revelation. I'm sorry Weird now as an adult to retroactively be weird really worried about my teenage or older brother Like that. I wish I could go back in time and just say like hey bud Hey, you're cool enough. I'm trying to own myself as a holistic person. You know, I mean, I don't need to be That's not a different me. That's the same me that got us all here. Oh, that's weird because I would say they let drive my kids around Yeah in a vehicle, you know

Um, it is fun I think that you should be able to like when you're like, I don't know filling out your taxes or whatever There should be a spot where it's just like you list all the actual dumb decisions you made and so Then when you're like late on taxes, they're like, I'm just glad we got it at all Yeah, do you see what this guy did when he was like 14 and oh my god He ate a bunch of boardwax Then yelled that his tummy was now a snowboard and and then he yelled Then he yelled hop on get ready to flip and I was like, I don't

I don't think flipping is like the main thing in snowboarding Um, but at that point he was already grinding on every surface in the office. So and he was slippery he was that um Can I do can I approach the wizard humbly and Prostate myself in front of him. Yes, but I really think you need to look that up before we record again Yeah, I don't think that that's exactly right Unless you want the wizard to stick a finger in your butt. No. No. No. No. No. No. I don't I mean No, no, no. No, I don't want that. Um

So here's this one was sent in by uh, tao. Thank you. Uh, it's uh, how to look gothic without your parents getting upset Oh We all and we please we all You know have gone through and or are still going through this stage of our lives And we all struggled with it because we were like You know, we watched, uh, Edward scissor hand. Yeah door deft. Yeah the craft or The craft just like uh Adam's family Adam's family saw that we're like, I would love to just sort of

Just chomp roll hulia's style right now and be that Um, but then we did it. We were just like overnight went bam. Thank you. Thank you, ma'am and came downstairs And we you know, we're perfectly cosplaying As as Gomez Adams and our parents were like, no, that's too much But here is how to really do it without upsetting your parents because that's the most important thing Part one nothing goth about upsetting your parents exactly to part one dressing goth transform yourself at a slow pace Uh, uh, I like a medic plan to look goth over an extended period Incorporate clothes that identify you as goth one piece at a time and over many months create a six month plan

Um, because it's like the easiest way to boil a frog or by which I mean your parents You just they'd look at you one day. Why are you boiling your parents? You're eight months in your parents like wait, uh, wait a tick. Hold up. Hold up a second You got a different sort of uh different flavor today. Hey, jeff. Jeffrey. Debbie Has griffin always looked like this? Because like I'm looking at him and I'm thinking Is that new but then when I'm like remembering griffin for the last six eight months I can't remember a time

Where he didn't kind of look like this Are we okay with this? Are we okay? Is it too late now? Yeah Uh, incorporate some bright colors into your fashion. Well, uh by incorporating some bright colors You'll send the signal that although you are goth you are not going overboard Mmm, you can still easing in. Yes. Don't rush it. No, it's savor it. Enjoy it This is these are your final days as a normie and so you can you know Enjoy that until you are ready to fucking, you know party party with the vampires You also need to be able to back off of it if it's not like

landing for you. Yeah Like you need to be like, I don't think I was Gough, that doesn't sound right. No, don't you remember yesterday? Like you came into school and you were like fully kitted out with like you remember it's like No I don't are you okay? Here's a good flip dress somewhat conservatively While the color scheme of your goth style might frighten your parents you can temper this by embracing a somewhat conservative approach um, the picture I am seeing here is uh, uh two people and there's a dude who is wearing like

Uh, a very sleek blazer over a black button-up shirt with a black belt with some black pants And his hair's done all good and there's a lady with the same sort of fashion going on And I just am imagining one of us as a teenager walking downstairs in our In our you know vampire going to a wedding outfit and just been like, hello. Hello, mother and father Don't worry about me. I'm goth now Well time to go to work Yeah, gotta go. I gotta shift at tcby today I think if your kid's goth you got to cancel work that day and just talk through it. You got to understand it

Where's it coming from if nothing else just be like, okay? Because when you go into the world with other teenagers, they might be kind of shitty to you Because that's how it works. And I'm listen. I support this 100 percent I just want you to know that there will be assholes out there who will not and we're gonna talk through this I'm gonna just write and to be clear. It's not because you're dressing goth. It's because you're wearing A full suit A full men's magazine cover suit to your eighth grade class Yes, you're swung hard into what I believe is called executive goth

Yes, exactly. And perhaps you want to start as a more casual goth And then only do executive goth on I don't know like standardized testing days Like weakened goth is is pretty impactful. What if you found what if you saw one of your teachers at tcby? Yeah, and they're a weakened goth and they're like you too. That's good Or you could do I think it's called like fitness goth Where yeah, and you're like wearing like black track suits and stuff and it's still very gothic But you're also ready to get out there and work up a sweat You could also do old old fisherman goth

Oh, that's a good one where you you know, you sort of fuse those two things together Um, and that one will confuse people a little bit. So they'll be like, who's that old old fisherman? He'd be like, no, it's it's it's me. I love me. Who's that old fisherman who looks so sad? He looks so sad, but also so fucking cool. Yeah, um, there's a bunch of boring shit after that Let's get into accessorizing focus on goth. That's where it is, right? Yes, like if I saw someone in a black t-shirt in black jeans, I'm like, okay But then what's that a spiky wristband? Oh, okay Yeah, it uh, it could be uh, jk Simmons if it's just that like a tight

Tight black t-shirt tight pants like you don't know it might be goth. Is that's a fun game We could make that a game on this show. Is it goth or is it jk Simmons? We don't actually know if he is part of that lifestyle I hope he is actually. Yeah, I do too. Uh, I want that for him accessories can help you transform your existing wardrobe into one with a gothic flare Yeah, I had a big bowling shirts face in high school I wonder if I had tossed on I want to call this episode my brother my brother me revelations Yeah, I wonder if my brother my brother me a retrospective If I had maintained that look and also worn dark scarves jewelry like snakebone hairpins a spider ring a bat bracelet

Then it just says belts. Yeah. Well, we all need belts. Yeah, that's just practical But here's the trick sometimes Uh, you skip the belt loops. It's just about just the belt is there as it's only tiny That's cool. That's and that's so fucking goth That is so fucking goth. This is if we've learned anything from the fact that fitness goth exists Goff is kind of like I think the fashion equivalent of like steampunk is to storytelling Where it meshes well with pretty much anything so like I could take say my phase in high school where I wore button-up shirts dress shirts

And tear away exercise pants and dance shoes and add some goth accessories to that and now I'm embarrassing goth, you know, I mean it just ties in all the theater kid goth if you will but Travis by the Yeah, I'm sorry for how much I bullied you In high school, even I know I actually think you didn't bully me enough because like I did that for a long enough period That um, some some older girls had an intervention for me Where they said like hey, you seem cool. You gotta stop with this. You got this. Look your pants You're you are in public. Your pants should not tear away. Yes This was long before there were uh, you know, like flash mobs

And so maybe I was just ahead of the curve. You don't know. Um, yeah I I you can be like me and just kind of like stop evolving your style at 16 Just like get to 16 be like, yeah, that's good Well, no Justin jeans in a short sleeve button down. I got it I'm gonna push back a little bit because you did I would say inject some disney dad flair in there Later in life. That was just a circumstance of where I happen to be when I needed a shirt. That's like that's that's not my That's good point I would argue that in high school juice

You had yet to receive the jimmy buffet blood transfusion that transformed you Into the man you are that was actually when you don't need fucking island vibes You're on island time 24 hours a day and you don't even realize Yeah, you need coal irony of life of age. You may be listening to this right now And you might be in your house the other days So you don't need he you know, jimmy says take the weather with you as the name one of his albums And that's you do that when you're young you don't even think about it with when you're older You got to work at it a little bit still attainable. Um avoid dying your hair black right away

So fucking yeah, okay Make that one You know, it's too late. I already I already did. Yeah, I already did that. I assumed make that one. Yeah Um, because that's that one's gonna that's one's gonna get my name recommend purple Yeah, much better. Uh, you'll still ruin a lot of pillowcases and white t-shirts Trav yeah Are you got oh man travi Are you got I'm no no no no no no no no like I think about it. I understand and I understand the impulse and there's like zero

Just right here. Obviously. I'm emo. I'm a lot more emo than that I'm uh like uh like a dad emo like emo dad like a seamster dad Yeah, that's a lot more of my thing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah, because like the music I'm listening to is like playing at the disco And and fallout boy where it's much more like elder emo. Wow. Dan trav you're not kidding That really is sort of your set. Yeah. Yeah guys Hey, we've known each other for a long time, right? But I've never really thought of myself as someone who's living Like life with an emo brother

So when I have purple hair and like eyeliner And like I'm wearing, you know, like a suit with like a little like bird skull lapel pin Yeah, I bet trav is it seemed like more like a costume than an expression of your authentic self But now I feel like you're living it. Yeah Man, my you know my problem and I feel like this is something we could all learn from My problem is that I think of you too frequently as a person first And labels second. Oh, that's a mistake. I feel like we could all do do well To try to think of people in terms of labels. Yeah. Yeah as a person second

Because I'm working really hard to show my label and people are like, yeah, but I don't want to talk about that And it's like but that's all I want to talk about Please I'm gonna hop forward. Don't get any tattoos or piercings. Yeah Um, and then we're gonna move on to part three, which is I'm assuming by the way that they will tell me when it is Okay to dye my hair. Yeah, I have to circle back on it. If you're gonna delay me on it And eventually I can get tattoos and piercings, right? Someday. Yeah, I think could you do a um an ombra I think is what it's called where you just get a little bit of the hair dyed black And then your parents would be like, is he going is his hair going wait? It's not going gray. What's going on?

um So part three behaving well wait be true to yourself. You don't have to change your which one is it? Yes, um Be true to your best self. I guess uh step two and this is an awesome one for like any one of these like lifestyle things And it's uh number two get good grades Yeah, man They should put that in constant. They should put that in literally every yeah, that's what i'm saying. Yeah It's like how to live like goku and it's like practice meditation and get very strong

And then it's got to be like and then get good grades Because that's awesome. You're gonna learn stuff and have better opportunities And your parents will be very pleased with you even though you're living that full blown goku lifestyle Uh, oh man avoid friends who get into trouble. Yeah, you don't know what is going on on this lit I feel like sami's grandma. What wrote this? Yeah, right? I will remind you the whole list and sitting backwards on a chair and now griffin Yes, please remind us griffin The name of the article is how to look gothic without your parents getting upset

And so this one's like if you did dye your hair black and you got six lip piercings And then you found this article you'd be like fuck fuck fuck fuck, but then you get to part three and it's like hey it's okay Just get good grades And that's really gonna knock this out of the park don't have friends who get into trouble And it shows somebody guys and they're smoking a cigarette No, no, no, thank you. Yep. Stay away from this day and age What are they gonna do when they get on a long airplane flight? Oh, yeah, exactly final one show respect to your parents

The way you look might alienate your parents, but the way you act and talk to them is more important Um, but here's the kobi ashi maru if you're like mom dad I know I have a different steez now, but I love you both and I respect you and they say we love you too Please go back to changing to dressing the way you used to and you can't be like I respect you But but fuck no, I look so cool now. You don't even get it. I'm down. I'm pulling down tail 24 seven You don't understand

Parents just don't understand how much tail I'm pulling with my new gothic style Because it can't be like the last step in this is like go back to normal if your parents Wicked don't like it. You know what I mean? Like you could have good grades and get rid of your smoking friends and be true to yourself and all that And they could still even after all that work be like go change Go change immediately. No, here's what it is griffin griffin griffin griffin First before you do any of the style changes You start to get bad grades and hang out with kids who smell. Oh my god, travis. Yes

And then as you transition to the goth style Yeah, you start to clean up your act and they're like, I don't know what it is, but It's it's really working for them. You know and they see it as like they're connected I like that a lot. I like that a lot It's like when justin got blonde highlights and and then he started living wow. I didn't even volunteer that I thought I thought it would be okay because we're all just sort of dishing dishing out the And this is a private episode more like a self dish so far hasn't it felt like that so far that it's more of a

Self dish like a self serve. You know eat what you want kind of deal. No. Yeah, I think griffin's right Just anything you want to say about griffin Yeah, no, I love my brother very much. Come on, dude. Blast me. No, I don't you don't want to talk about when he bought the Red goggles from hot topic and his friend evan bought the green goggles and then they switched one lens of both So they had red and green goggles each Yeah, that's just he was going to see a 3d movie later that I do you want no I definitely wore them at school, uh, but and that and that theater practice and a theater But are you are you they're called rehearsal travels? Um, but how are you gonna blast the coolest thing I've ever done in my life?

That's fair. Yeah. Yeah You know, it's true I don't really want to blast you. I love my brother. Okay You did try to get people to call you Andy that one. Yeah, that's true that in depth Well, I also tried to get the nickname shades go in at church camp. This is all stuff that we've talked about on this show We've been doing it for a billion billion trillion trillion trillion years. Yeah, uh, let's take a break and make some money Right. Yeah, and then we'll come back and do some other things You guys know what

I just built a website on Squarespace yesterday Did you I did What is it? Uh, I'm working on a new podcast that I'm executive producing called chasing immortality And I wanted to build a website for that and I made what's the website address chasing immortality pod.com Okay, um, and I think it's uh, I mean listen, it's it's nothing It's not like I'm really worried about I'm charlie. I'm really worried about you. Did you just call Travis charlie? Travis I'm really worried about you. No, I combined two words

I'm really worried about you Travis because this website looks so expensive. Oh, and then you must have spent so much money Um, getting professional to design this website. Oh, no, just just Justin Justin. You dumb piece of shit I made it myself In about like 30 to 40 minutes You're kidding me. No, you stupid asshole. I made that You don't have to talk to him like that. Oh, you're right. You're right. Hey friends in case you I should I should clarify For the bit Squarespace is great. Travis actually did not work very hard on this website I am going to take another pass at it. Yes, I did. I mean I'm going to take another pass at it

But I needed something functional So that I could get started and the thing the bigger point Justin But I was trying to get to is I realized as I was making this one I was like how many websites I have used at Squarespace to build for just kind of off the cuff like ideas I've had the cuff indeed and Okay I know they have beautiful customized little templates created by world-class designers I didn't have the copy up and I know that there's many options. You could have gone with your travels. Listen, Justin's right

Don't let my Work ethic reflect the quality of Squarespace. You know you had to work that hard They have beautiful customizable templates They do and it lets you sell products and services well kind and everything's authorized for mobile out of the box But I am a lazy turd and I was like this has links. That's good They have analytics to help you grow free and secure hosting and nothing to patch or upgrade ever So go to squarespace.com slash my brother for a free trial When you're ready to launch use the offer code my brother to save 10% off your first purchase of a website at your main

Squarespace anyone can make a website even a dumb shit like Travis McRoy Space that's there. No, that's your tag tag line. It's printed right there This isn't a failure because you are a dumb shit. It's just that you were kind of lazy and you didn't work very Thank you Can we move on from this? This is kind of a weird energy. I like to okay Do you need to mail your brother's garbage website to the dumpster factory? Well, look no further than sams.com It's a way to skip the trip to the post office dodge all the the hectic halloween traffic

And uh save a little time and money at stamps.com. I love I'll hey listen. Yeah Nobody lives at a post office, right? Well, but you can I bet somewhere there like somewhere like in a small town unless you count like the The the one that's on uh that I heard about um where it's on a boat Yeah, I mean it's like a boat. There's one that's like a boat that like there's like boat ones. Oh, yeah Oh, right, right, right, right, of course But anyway, nobody lives really on a post office, but you can you turn your house into post office stamps.com Cool, you discounts can't find anywhere else 40% off us ps rates and 76% off ups. Are you kidding me?

That's a lot. I'm not kidding. That's a lot. You can save time and money together That's a hundred and sixteen percent off if you mail a package Two packages one using us ps one using ups add that together. That's a hundred and sixteen percent off Amazing amazing save time and money this holiday season with stamps.com Sign up with promo code my brother for a special offer that includes a four week trial free postage and a digital scale No long-term commitments or contracts. Just go to stamps.com click the microphone at the top of the page and enter code My brother did you say a digital scale? Yeah a digimon scale. It's a dirigible scale. You can put It's a didgeridoo scale, but you did right on there

Hey kid Your dad tell you about the time he broke steven dorf's nose at the kids choice awards In dead pilot society scripts that were developed by studios and networks But were never produced are given the table reads they deserve When I was a kid I had to spend my christmas break film and a psa about angel dust. So yeah being a kid sucks sometimes Presented by andrew reich and ben blacker dead pilot society twice a month on maximum fun dot org You know the show you like that hobo with the scarf who lives in a magic dumpster Dr. Who

I have lots of fish tanks One of which is on my bathroom vanity. The problem is that my bathroom is where I get dressed every morning Because closing the blinds in my room takes effort and I am lazy travis. You can certainly uh relate to this I should do Consequently my fish sees me naked a lot. Is this inappropriate huh That's some fishy business

There is no way that a fish Of any level of intelligence Could look upon the human form and parse it whatsoever, right? Not only are we like comparatively gigantic to them Yeah, so many of the parts are different. Yeah, you couldn't contextualize it I don't even know if a fish has a has a beamus. So What two? I mean, listen, they got eyes and mouth and as far as I can tell the

Well, I just meant externally Parts that they can like look at us and be like, I know those are eyes But what the fuck are those would be rest of it That's like elbows fingers shoulders I'm not even getting into any of the like, you know the stuff that are covered by clothes Like I mean, I can I mean we could just start here. Okay fish snake fish naked fish is absolutely naked fish is naked Fish has always been naked fish is naked all the fish doesn't even understand anything else other than naked Yep, except for the first time your fish sees you naked your fish is like, okay, I get this

Can I tell you guys something this I can get into it just fucked me up What don't google this but think right now Are scales fish's skin or are the scales covering their skin underneath? Are the scales yeah, or are the scales like hair the scales are scales because it's fish Yeah, but I mean like what's what's the corollary, right? It's not you don't need to meta you don't need to turn it into a metaphors just scales bud But are the scales the skin different or is there skin under the scales? Bud are the rocks their taxes think about it. Yeah

think about it Listen, you're being flippant because you don't know the answer and that's they're being flip it. They're fish. That's true That's yeah, they're being a lip it I Just threw it die across the room I was thinking you were talking about how fish is naked when don knots turns into the incredible mr. Limpet first of all he turns into a fish A real shark tail ass looking fish that looks a lot like don knots, but he also has glasses on

So he's not completely nude if you think about it. Do you guys ever think that we talk about uh, mr. Limpet so much that maybe we have thought it into existence and it is not Actually, yeah, that's interesting Yeah, probably because when you think about it is a movie about a man who wishes to be a fish so hard That he turns into a fish and then helps the u.s. Government spot Uh, like see like mines in the sea Yeah to protect submarines in the war Yeah, man. What a badass

What a complete badass and then I think this man turned fish Has relations with another fish. Yeah, definitely. It definitely does that. What a movie you guys and this is for kids Yeah, well, it's the god of something for grown-ups too. Yeah Travis, you just got a fish tank. How do you feel about showing your uh, I did it day one to establish dominance. Okay They were probably pretty wild now in there just like what's this new place? Oh, look, there's rocks. This water tastes different. Look at that big ass Is that dude evil or what? Whoa, what's his vibe? He's got purple hair. Wow a butthole. I don't know anything about that Why is he showing me this?

Fish got my holes Fish are not very freaked out by my holes. Yeah. Yeah Uh, when I bought the fish or a fish tank the person uh at the pet store said like that you had to put him You know in an opaque bag to drive them home or else it could like scare the fish too much because It's the equivalent and this is a quote the equivalent of an alien abduction to them In yeah, definitely. I've you seen Nemo And then I started thinking about how much farther that concept extends We're like if someone picked up me and put me in another house

Inside someone else's house. I and it's sorry. It started to get too much for me. I couldn't handle it Yeah, I don't blame you Huh, huh? Weird I want a munch I want to munch Dracula out a little bit in there. I didn't mean to be Dracula. I was like It's italian

Oh, I try to make it sound like italian. Yeah, that's awesome, man. Wait, is Dracula not italian? Dracula Transylvanian, bud Oh, right. Right. Right. Right. Yeah, garlic thing would have been a bigger deal Yeah, um, okay A new temptation is born Oh The passionate kiss burger to enjoy. Oh, no say that 10 times again The passionate kiss burger to enjoy with every bite. Is it brought to you by gene Simmons?

Hmm. What restaurant do you think is brought to you by? Oh, good question I'm gonna say Hmm red Robin interesting Griffin Uh, the passionate kiss burger passionate kiss burger It's gotta be not one of the main ones. I feel like it's gotta be a wild one like dairy queen or something like that

Oh, no, wait, hold on. I'm gonna say olive garden because you said italian earlier No, I mean literally italian A new irresistible temptation Stimming from the creativity of colonel sanders. What the kiss burger now available in all kfc restaurants in italy Whoa, whoa is a chicken sandwich It's a bad start italy, but go on a chicken sandwich for your burger Prepared according to the colonel's original and secret recipe Topped with double cheddar cheese

Crunchy bacon and two delicious onion rings. Great Enjoy every bite with the passion of a kiss Because pleasure Knows no obstacles. Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait, not even topped with onions Now, Justin, I I want you to know I listen to every word you just said Mm-hmm Are you telling me that the entirety of the name passionate kiss burger? Yeah is a lie

No, because it is neither a burger nor has anything to do with a passionate kiss except that One might enjoy it With the passion of a kiss Yes, this is what i'm saying. It's a sandwich that brings a kiss kiss burger What part of that tell you not understand in the advertising film and yes, it is a film colonel sanders talks about the new burger and all its delicacy A sandwich that brings you closer that unleashes passion for kisses In couples of all ages ethnicities and sexual orientations with onions on it

The launch campaign of the new burger Plays with the cliche of the onion. Oh, which could turn people away after eating it But colonel sanders recipe is so good that it has the opposite effect Everybody the sandwich triggers the desire to share and rediscover the pleasure of being together That's from palo tifano head of marketing and communications at kfc italia um Is it a sorry you I I think I a lot I didn't pay attention there for about Interesting three quarters of a second and now I don't know if this is a movie or a chicken burger

Right, so it's both. It's a sort of trans media experience where it's kind of a burger that they've adapted into an advertising film Yeah, a 30 second advertising film, right? Once again, we wanted colonel sanders as the protagonist of the commercial He is the best testimonial for the message we want to continue to share at kfc We are all the same and invited to enjoy the chicken Okay, and kfc We're all the same And invited to enjoy the chicken love that the atmosphere

The sharing and welcoming experience that we offer at our restaurants also Debunking some cliches like the one about onions. Is that a cliche? That's the what's the onion cliche? It do make your breath stinky It's but the recipe of passion for this burger that's chicken is so powerful that it gets you Fucking Oh, oh, I see. Oh, I like that. I like that. This one is a burger. That's what they're saying and guys This is kind of hard for the yeah, it is

Sorry, Trev, you were kicked off the podcast first. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah, you said hard and we're talking about getting horny And so I connected you said I lost you again. Oh, I lost you again. Can you try to yeah? Can you hear me now? I made it sound like a boner Okay, guys, I'm gonna send you a link don't watch it yet. Oh my goodness And you at home are gonna watch this too. How are you sending it to us? I'm gonna slack it to you, baby Oh topical Don't watch it until I tell you to oh my god. I want to watch it so bad I know but I'm gonna start the music so people can enjoy it with you. All right

Get it loaded up and get ready to start. I'm ready. Are you ready to start? Go The kfc il piacere non conosce barriere prova il nuovo kiss burger filetto di pollo preparato Secondo la mia ricetta originale segreta doppio cedar ve con croccante e due gollose ognon ring Qualche problema con la cipolla? Perché stare lontani dalle tentazioni Woowocky's burger come closer kfc She's united. Can you play just the come closer bit?

Woowocky's burger come closer kfc chicken united. It's so great That's yeah, it's really really good Actually extremely surprised by the horniness of that commercial. Yeah, dude If you guys google kfc kiss burger because we probably uh, man, we'll probably tweet it out and include an episode Ladies and stuff. It's like a very money commercial unabashedly said this is not like your side long glances or your implant People are full on Tonguing each other. Yeah, they're tongueing hard. Um Yeah, this is like kfc is trying to establish itself as like the new like make out spot

That like oh, hey eat this burger get totally revved up and then taste each other's tonsils my dude Is this now I understand why they're all like Talking about how onions Have a bad taste and smell to them Yeah, because they're assuming that you are going to be chowing down on your partner's face Moments after consuming this big burger because it's not a burger because of consuming griffon. That is important This is not like This is not the the burger is not superfluous

To the experience but rather integral without it. You are not going to be chowing down on each other's faces Yeah Hey, cool commercial Did we talk about the fact that there's about a thousand scenes of people kissing like deeply deeply kiss like just one trouble mind you A lot of couples maybe they um They're like they love the burger flavor. They're kissing the burger at the same time Like it's one of those like cool three-way kisses that you see in like cool movies That people do or it's like me

My my beautiful wife and a chicken burger in between us with the stinkiest Indians I've ever been close to in my life But I do like the idea of each other's stinky breath making it okay, right? We're eating the same burger So, you know what? We're all the same here kfc. Everybody's breath is stinky. So let's just enjoy it and get into it. Yeah Um, cool commercial juice. Thanks for sharing that with us. Yeah, it's very good It doesn't look like a very good sandwich, but there was but I would eat the hell out of that It looks good as hell. I'm really hungry though. Yeah, that's also true. It's about lunchtime here It's also really funny because there's 319 comments on this video that's been viewed 6 000 times, which is quite a huge That's what that's 20

kfc. Italia has uh Put a comment on the On the top of it. That's like hey everybody, please be nice About this commercial it's like can't see you have the power to turn correct comments off and can't see like no no no Everybody gets their stuff free must be freedom speech, but be cool. Just please be cool Um, man, that was a good that I never want to I don't ever want to kiss again It's one of those things where it's like, oh, I think I'm done. I have I've had my fill They don't address choking hazards in this at all. Do the

Yeah, hey, how come their kernel is maybe the handsomest Older gentleman I've ever seen a very legitimate So we keep fucking bouncing around. It's like here's like kevin mealan for For some reason, you know what I mean? Yeah, well Thank you so much for listening to podcasts this one specifically this podcast all podcasts are equal in my book Yeah, all the lists go to the same place really, right? Yeah into the big podcast hole um, very very very exciting news, uh A lot of things actually so first

We've got the adventure zone live and virtual show this week november 5th 9 p.m. Eastern time tickets are $10 It's another episode of hoot nanny All about the intergalactic country band hootie and the nannies You can get those tickets at bit.ly slash taz virtual and even if you can't make it Friday at 9 p.m. Eastern time Video on a band will be available for two weeks after the show We've got new merch up and listen. We've got a wizards of the cloud pin of the month We've got a candlelight ornament that wizards of the cloud pin of the month, by the way designed by dana wagner And it benefits native women led which revolutionizes systems and inspires innovation by investing in native women in business

The candlelight ornament is designed by kate may and benefits harmony house Which is an organization to end homelessness in huntington area through permanent housing and supportive service programs Uh, we've got the candlelight smug there, which is similar to it the adventure zone stoneware mug But it has the candle nights logo, but we've also got for the first time Till death do us blart merch We've got a till death do us blart shirt, which is designed by tyler reid And proceeds from that benefit the first nations development institute Which improves economic conditions for native americans through direct financial grants

technical assistance and training and advocacy and policy So that's all cool. Uh, we've got tickets for the emerald city comic con show On sale now my brother my brother and me on december 2nd and taz on december 3rd Both shows are general attendance. So there's no assigned seating, but there will be a da seating available You do not need an eccc badge to buy tickets to these shows Uh emerald city safety protocols require full proof of vaccination Or recent negative covet test to attend you can find the full safety protocols at bit dot ly slash eccc

Safety, I think there's seven more. I think there's about nine to ten more seeds Yeah, in addition masks are required while on the premises and capacity will be reduced more info including the full health and safety procedures As well as ticket links, uh, is it bit dot oh i slash macro like tour also one last thing, uh, I have uh It's been working on a show for a long time now that I created an executive produced. It's a podcast called chasing immortality It's narrated by type diskin And it is the true stories of people throughout history who have attempted to cheat death in a variety of strange ways

It is a single voice Kind of narrative podcast all about these true weird stories If that sounds interesting to you, and I hope that it does you can subscribe by going to bit dot ly slash chasing immortality Or search chasing immortality in your podcatcher or as previously mentioned going to chasing immortality pod dot com And attempt to not judge my effort level but rather find all the information there that you need It's gonna be hard to not do the first thing though. Yes, I understand that but please please I've got a lot going on Thank you to montane for the use of our theme song my life is better with you

Fantastic track. We're so glad um that that she crafted that for us. Um So you gotta I know there's probably people who listen to this show who don't listen To the things we ask them to do you got to go listen to now in space and watch that video I've I've watched I've listened to it like a hundred times. It's it's a top bop She did one with card tom carty too. Yes called red flags. She seek that out very very good Yes, so thank you montane and thank you to maximum fun for having us on the network Uh, I'm glad to be here. Do you want the final y'all? Yes, cool. This one was uh sent in by kranston brian kranston Whoa

Yeah, I had no idea he was a listener Uh, he's not Oh, just sent it. Yeah, he just sent it. Anyway, uh, it's asked by yahu answers user from from fronken frankenstein from frankenstein Uh, which is the original frankenstein. Yeah, uh, and this one it says here specifically

It is the monster and to not be like a jackoff about it Okay, uh, fronk frankenstein asks I mean if it's his son, it's definitely gonna have his last name, right? Yeah, that's a good point Well, you but what's his first name charles frankenstein jr asks Um Does anyone know Does anyone know

a place to buy halloween costumes For an eight and a half foot tall Big strong big strong man No masks

that cover the whole head because of my special bolts that honest to Christ I swear to Christ I do not know why those are there the rest of me is all body parts but for some fucking reason my dipshit science dad put these fucking bolts in there please do not suggest I go as myself or some sort of different Frankenstein I'm the real deal holy field and I want to be one of the Paw Patrol my name is Justin McRoy I'm Travis McRoy I'm Griffin McRoy this is my brother my brother because your dad's square on the lips it's better with you maximumfun.org comedy and culture artist owned audience supported