My Brother, My Brother And Me - MBMBaM 616: Professor Honey and the Bone Drones

Episode Date: June 27, 2022

This show is for real BROS, living by the code. Brosephs, Broses, and Brosires. What kind of BRO are you? Listen to this episode to find out!Suggested talking points: Sony Phony, If God’s Not Dead How Do You Explain These Gains, Twelve Furious Bros, Frog Purgatory, Death By ConversationFairness West Virginia: https://fairnesswv.org/

The McElroy brothers are not experts and their advice should never be followed Travis insists. He's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mentioned only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening What's up, you cool, baby Precious friendship I could have never seen what was coming for me hangs at the skate park hangs by the beach my life It feels It's better it's better

It's better it's better Better it's better Hey everybody, welcome to what's the buzz our man versus be podcast I'm your queen bee Travis McElroy with me as always are my worker drones Justin and Griffin McElroy fucking bone drone The bone drones mr. Drone and miss we got we got professor honey over there Oh, yeah, we got my sweet boys my honey boys. Let me just say guys. Oh God

Finally Finally an old white straight dude Comedian has had the courage to say that they liked comedy better when they could say whatever the fuck they wanted Finally you bean you've done done it again Let's I listen, I don't throw this word around a lot anyone who knows me knows that but I'm just gonna say it hero Say I missed the time when I could fucking say anything and I didn't have to think about how other people Or like what my audience thought and so I'm so glad finally we have someone standing up for transgressive comedy Challenges our ideas so I can't wait to see what kind of challenging the status quo

man versus versus fucking fucking man Versus fucking bee press junkie is where bean feels like he needs to take his stand and Say, I might get listen This this one's gonna get me the hot water. It's I want to be the bee friend. I'm gonna be the marketing rep for Netflix, okay, okay, you're Rowan. Yeah, I would love this

Buzz buzz Rowan again Got you go for being so Classic and that is exactly the kind of magic. We're hoping you can capture today in your interviews about our Project man versus bee. Oh, yeah, for sure for sure So I brought in just so we can like kind of make sure we're on the same page. I've brought in You know

David Sims from the Atlantic. Oh We're good Travis you're David. Oh, hi. It's me David Sims so David has been kind enough to sort of do a I saw a mock interview if that's if we could try that. Oh, yeah, you know, you're not You don't think I'm ready for the real deal. I know you are. I know you are Rowan Oh, I just really want to keep it later. Yeah, so I'm just gonna start off with a real soft bonk. You're Rowan What what is it that you think makes man versus be such a great comedy?

Well, I was talking to my good friend Ricky Gervais the other day Okay, I was talking to him about Comedy Yeah, okay, so what makes me ever is going to say this is going I was about to say so good But like Ricky's actually been in a little bit of a I mean we love him over here at Netflix Enough of them. Yeah, so I think actually it's all going fine. So yeah, no notes Okay I've prepared a statement. Oh, okay

That doesn't normally happen in interviews, but yeah, go ahead Rowan It does seem to be that the job of comedy is to offend or have the potential to offend it I'm becoming Austrian Well, you're very you're very transformative as an actor row and I've always said that about you So what did wait? So what did you say about the job of comedy? It's to make people angry and you say you can't punch down But what if that's the closest thing to you? Well, hold on um Rowan It's so much easier punch down the job of comedy is to make people angry

Gravity But that's same Rowan isn't the job of comedy to make people happy and laugh Well, I was talking to my good friend best friend Man, he was a group sort of my wedding Richard Reves And He we were having a lot of laughs. We were watching a special. I was busting the fuck up at all of it and It got me thinking I Should be able to tell a joke about anything. I want with no repercussions whatsoever. I'm Mr. Bean

Well, that's certain that seems like a big ass Rowan and I do also feel like sorry. We're drifting away from the focus The beers it represents world culture. Oh, what yeah This is a scoop so you're telling me that what the movie actually is is man versus woke culture kind of But it's okay, but it's also like getting older Like it's me versus getting older and I we and I could squish it

Getting older with a beef flamethrower and see what I'm sorry. No, no, please. I we've very much I think I think what he I think what Sir Rowan is saying here. Oh, he's not the knighthood when you're fighting a bee You can't really punch up or down because I'm flying around so much that you're just punching every which way Arms and knocking over vases. I think is another great. Oh, so it's like a literal like, okay, that's it's a literal punching, right, Rowan I'm just saying That it seems to mirror the job of comedies to offend or have potential to offend and it cannot be drained of that potential Every joke has a victim. That's the definition of every let and let me make sure you get this quote

Which is the most bonkers shit? I've ever said or anyone really get it word-for-word Every joke has a victim. That's the definition of a joke Whoa Rowan Every joke has a Victim and that's and the rest of the quote that I didn't I'm not going to say off the record Is that jokes are like stabbings like that? Whoa, Rowan, okay, Rowan if I could just I don't want to feed

I'm ready to talk about my B film. No, no, no now. We're gonna talk about how you think the job of comedy is to offend people Entertain not to like make you feel better. So look at my boy. Look at my body It's very small With with comedy, uh-huh. I make her like a big weapon Sorry, sir. Oh, and by me. I but I don't knotted this particular ten episode long series Sir, oh, if I may even if you believe this bonkers thing about every joke has a victim

Let's just take that beautiful metaphor. So, okay, you don't like to punching up punching down thing. That's fine Why do you want to victimize? Okay in your logic? You want to be you think it's cool and fun? To victimize marginalized people that is what you think God God made me a comedian God made me a weapon Uh-huh look at my little look at my little body Yeah, wait, it's hard not to look at it now that you remove the robe You've contorted it into that big bug I faced that you do sometimes. Yeah Yeah, so anyway

So but when Mitch Hedberg said like when you're standing in front of a fire exit during a fire Right and he makes that whole joke about someone telling him to move because that's a fire exit Who's the victim in that joke? Well, it reminds me of a story by best friend Bill Maher told me when I was having dinner with him and Louie's and Louie's okay. Oh boy. Okay that Um Can we get back to the beefing cuz I've fallen out a lot in this movie and it hurts every time And I want a little bit of credit for that when you used a credit card to spread butter on toast Who was the victim there Rowan just out of curiosity?

Who were you really sticking it to there? That wasn't a joke. That was a story I Really have it. That was a story. I was did you just do an impression of me to me? I did do it again David that I'm sorry David hugely. I've actually been rowing this whole time He's David. You do it better than I do. I'm I'm transformative and scene the art

Must be separated from the artist in this case because it's Griffin I don't think it needs to be we're all rooting for the fucking B Oh, I hope the last shot is we find out early on that his character Trevor so challenging Trevor is allergic to bees and I hope the last shot of episode 10 At minute 100 collectively he gets stabbed in the fucking eyeball and we see him and like every flash of memory comes back And as he's dying he's like I was really piece of shit and then he dies That's what I'm rooting for. I just I think that's I think it's unlikely to happen the quotes. You're assuming it's a comedy the quotes that mr. Bean says in his article

Are truly truly truly outrageous? First of all, he says you've always got to kick up really what that's not I don't think anyone says you gotta kick a little to cause a stir What if there's someone extremely smug arrogant aggressive self-satisfied who happens to be below in society? They're not all in houses yeah, like trans people come on all arrogant They're not all in houses of Parliament or in monarchies Thanks, baby Anyway, this is not hard. It's not it's not hard then the other people God It's like fucking then the other people in that community

That arrogant person at the top in that community is up from them You don't just have fucking cart blanch Rowan They're not above you listen. I Don't have anything to say here But I just want to say This is about the most half-assed sort of condemnation of cancel culture that I have ever read it You can you can hear the trepidation in his quotes of like

It doesn't seem to me that uh Anyway, it's like he got a call from like other old white dude comedians and they're like hey Rowan buddy We notice you're getting a lot of press for man versus be and you are of a certain age And your skin is white in your hand be gonna need you to make a comment about cancel culture As is a requirement it appears for everyone who is a straight white Sis dude of a certain age

You got a credit. I will say the credit where credit's do yeah, huh credit or credit's do You have to be So deep in the paint on this belief system Like had a newspaper in the last five years and just been like I bet I can nail this Put me in coach you're just not saying it right. Give me one Anguishing Thanks, Rowan. It's given us it's given us I would say a lot to think about being That hard to say yeah, you're right. I fucked up shouldn't have made that joke. I'll do better

Exactly, I don't even think I don't even think he said it. I think he's saying other people say he's look around He sees the way the winds blowing he wonders when is spreading butter on toast with a fucking credit card going to be probably my medic Oh, and we don't know and he doesn't know he doesn't know that's the sort of Damocles swinging over his head So let's let's begin the show Yeah, it's an advice show as you know, here's some advice show your fucking mouth Travis, please everyone's opinion is incredible Travis now which way think about the small body You punching cuz you're a bigger guy. You're a bigger guy than Rowan. Oh, you're saying physically. Oh, yes, okay, physically

That's what it's meant the whole time. Oh That's why everybody's always fucking ripping on Tom Hanks. Yes, he's so tall and so broad Hey, it's why we have to make our comedy so weak because of our huge fucking bodies Yeah, a big ripped muscles. We should stop working out so we could make fun of more people That's why Tom Hanks is nice to everybody. It's cuz he's so worried. He'll notice there. He's fucking ass Yeah, and those one V1 me Tom one day Tom is gonna get mad, right? And he's gonna rip off his suit that he always wears and underneath this is gonna be huge glistening fucking muscles and everyone's like we had no idea and he's like why'd you think I was so nice

Not now and they just gonna punch through everyone's faces. You look at his eye You look at his eyes. They're the deadest eyes. You've ever deadest eyes because all the life has drained down to his huge fists Okay, this is my show. Oh real quick Thanks to everybody who came out to our shows in Boston and Mashantucket, Connecticut You all were really it was a really fun time, especially to like the platinum rewards members or whatever it Fox was to see now Oh, can we just real quick? Who just wandered in because they got free tickets if you're in their VIP program So they're like our shows come on and they came in and a special shout out to the lady who then went to buy a poster and said to the

Mercherson like I hated the show, but I will buy a poster and when asked why the response was I like that one's purple hair So that's good. Hey, thank you. Hey, thanks. That money still folds. You know, whatever Yeah, thanks to y'all that can't like they took a flyer on it. It's not for everybody But they were like, you know what I got a few minutes till the buffet opens I'm just gonna duck in on the macros real quick see what these cats are out to you. Anyway Thanks for coming. That's got to be a wild one to walk into but good good on ya Thanks to everybody. Y'all look great. And um, if you want to see us for doing some more shows in July and November and maybe some others keep a lot Okay

Something I've been gun-doing is painting on my front porch. I'm not very good But I enjoy it just for sitting in the sun laying my mind wander However, one of my neighbors has seen me doing this several times and every time tells me I should put my art in the local museum The thing is she has never actually seen my work and she doesn't seem to be joking In fact, she's begun asking me if I've sent my work to the gallery yet and when I say no, she seems annoyed How do I reclaim the contentment of painting on my porch? That's from porch Picasso in hamilton ontario Art is if we've learned anything today subjective Yeah, and so I bet right the right agent the right

Uh, I don't know dealer could sell your painting without anyone ever seeing it. You know what I mean? And I can tell you how I can tell you exactly how and this is why I think I would be a great art agent Okay, you think I'm in your painting. Maybe it looks good. Maybe it looks like a dog. Shit But I take like a literal like a like a painting of a rich guy and I say Check this art out and they say, oh, that's uh, interesting. I say yes, uh, $50,000 and they say why I say well the elephant did paint it with his trunk Oh

Why I'd love to meet the artist. It's uh, you can't he's too big He's so big you it's hard to get in places I'll go to him He's very territorial. His tusks are so sharp um But look at this and it's like it transcends the the Elephant experience and human yeah, it's really great. I'm just kind of into penguin art right now

Oh, well, let me see if I have any penguin art. Oh, here's one right here. It looks very same It looks similar. I know but a penguin did this one. He's friends with the elephant No way. Yeah, he did plagiarize I'll tell you what I'd love is if you could get a colab going between the two of them Oh, hold on. Uh, here's that here's that exact thing. Yeah, I'll take it How much did you say? Well, this one's a hundred thousand because it was the colab between the penguin and the elephant and so I have to I have to pay them independently

Can I trade you this painting that was done by a tiger? What if the painting is of the neighbor? Oh, wow Wait, they're like, did you send it in yet and you're like I have not even begun To capture A tenth of a million of the light in my subject's eyes and then you spin it around and it's them Yeah, and they're holding hands with the joker and the joker's hell. Yeah, and they're in it. I love this. Which joker which joker What which come on the funniest joker?

The only joker I would say by the way that's ever been funny the walkie-feet Oh, you don't think it's the only funny joker. You don't think joker that's out of out of time and out of universe Jared leto's very good. He's a funny funny so transgressive Hey, is there anything funnier than the fact that everybody was clowning so hard at morbius that sony was like They love it Let's put morbius back in theaters and they had leto up there on tick tock Like it's morbentime go see morbius in theaters, baby. It's so funny, right? And then nobody went and saw morbius Well, what happened as I understand that

It's that morbentime was a viral joke and jared leto saw it and was like, ah, yeah And announced we're making morbius too. And then sony had to be like, uh, there are no plans to make morbius too That's so morbius That's so morbius. Did we do a morbius watch? I think we did do a more we were ahead of the curve on that one. Okay, good um, you need to show them the art and you will be able to Micro expression

Judge whether or not they still believe it belongs in a museum or not And it's gonna be tough because they're gonna say like, oh, yeah that is But that is perfection. That is poignant But they're gonna make a face when they first see it like oh damn Oh damn that can't go into museum. Oh damn And you you will know from that I think the next time they ask if it's in gallery just say yes

Just say yes They'll be happy The next time you see the next time you look in their window and see them cooking in the kitchen Start pounding on their door and they run to answer it be like just send that pie to the Pie contest just so like they know what it's like when every single thing you do has to be adjudicated on the very highest level possible In this case a pie contest Or did you submit your painting to a pie contest? What why aren't there a part of painting eating guns?

Thank you I would love to watch I love watching uh, youtube art restoration videos, but they would be triple improved after sort of Dehydrating the work and repairing the the framework for the canvas and retacking it and to you know doing uh, You know very conservative touch-ups here and there and then they got a big yummy plate and a knife and fork And they tucked in a bit and just went to town on it and got pretty sick I'm guessing or what if it was like, uh, what's it called? You guys are both video game nerds when it's like an unbalanced Like pvp. What's that called when it's like one versus four something symmetrical asymmetrical

Where one person is trying to restore the painting while someone else is trying to eat it I see and it's like a race to see how much of it can get eaten before it's finished destroying How well you can restore it while it's getting eaten That sounds good to me I would watch the fuck out of that and also the floor is lava. Can we approach the wizard? Yeah, let's go supplicate yourselves Haters as we learn all about this one some a lot of people sent this in thank you. It's it is it's how to be a bro I've done that. I have I have siblings

This is different. Oh, they mean it in like the Okay, um, you know Barney Samson Oh, okay. Is that not like the dinosaur. Yeah, Barney. Yeah, Barney from Barney Brom Samson from uh, How I did meet your mom and so we are gonna start here with method one being a good bro live by a bro code Every bro's gotta have a code It's the thing that unites them binds and solidifies the concept of the bro separating bro from the common bees and squirrels of the world

Your bro your bro code is and squirrels. You say your bro code is up to you and your bros as well as the punishments for Transgressing but a few rules are generally universal when it comes to bros never mess with your bros date sister or mother Always have a bros back always take wingman responsibilities seriously bros won't make other bros look bad in front of girls bros don't let bros drive drunk That last one I don't think is typically in there, but it's the best way. It's awesome, right? It's a good it's I there should be more like that like bros Help bros make smart fiscal investments. Yeah, right bros let other bros know when they should be Moisturizing don't let other bros lease because you're honestly just stowing your money

Yeah, bros help other bros remember to start preparing their taxes in like february and don't wait till the last minute Find your neighbors and build up a brome unity bros. Fuck. I need to pay my taxes bros got Oh, Travis, we were a derelict dereliction of bro duties on that we gotta watch out for our bros His fiduciary health. God dang I like I love fiduciary fiduciary More like I love nothing more than the concept of like going door to door in your neighborhood. Hey, how's it going? I'm looking to put together A close-knit group of bros

Um, is that something you or anyone in this house would be interested in it's grecian if that helps It's like grease bros. Yeah, like from grease times not like gross. We're not bromans Okay, we're not bromans. We're just browing out with other in a grecian fashion right now Here it's just right now. It's just me and zack and we hang out in a little chamber. We called the barfittoria so uh Surround yourself with other bros ifs bras and bros yeas bros say bros say bros ears bros ears

Yeah, I'll wear it. It's just to give me a little shape up there. It's a bros ear. Learn. I love it Bros don't body shame other bros bro. Yeah, bro. That's true. It's a bros ear I love it, man. You look good. I love your confidence. I love how it makes you feel Learn the proper bro shake when two bros meet they don't shake hands like a couple of preachers and they certainly don't hug what Bros don't hug guys or give each other preacher shakes. They bro shake. They just gently touch this It's a combination hug. They just they just give a feather soft kiss on the lips Just butterfly kit, but broder fly cut but butterfly butterfly kisses butterfly kisses

butterfly kisses when my bro gets here Gonna drink a hundred thousand cases of beer They gonna talk about the feelings, but we will never hug Then he tries to drive home, but I won't let him cuz he's drunk They bro shake it's like a combination hug high five and arm wrestling match in other words perfect for bros They love all and then you share a bro to visualize that is that the thing where they're like bro and then their two hands like clasp in arm wrestling fashion and they just swing it back and forth like big bodies together

Yeah, and touch this. I just don't understand why can't bros hug. That's so weird They hug and like they hug in band of brothers. Well, you can hug jelson. Sorry. You can hug You got to do handshake into hug pat pat break Handshake into hug pat pat break. That's for bros That's the christian. They I mean you got the christian side hug And you can do a christian side hug, but no hugs before bro marriage It actually says the next step says abandon your faith in christ only have But do keep your grades up keep your grades up

It says How bother rose cram for tests I'm gonna skip around here. Say what you mean the world is for too many complicated things conversing with your bros shouldn't be one of them You should have open bro communication Um, if you're pissed that your bro borrowed your car and didn't fill it up say dude next time fill it up Word if if you're upset that your bro Borrowed your copy of iron giant and didn't rewind it before giving it back because you still believe in vh That's another thing about bros fucking love the hs. Yeah, they hate DVDs hate

They hate digital media and they like to have a collection a bro election if you will that they can show other bros That's very important Uh, always be rallying just like joe montana in the super bowl I don't under andretti at the indy 500 He drives or michael jordan in the playoffs. I know that one good bros can't stop and won't stop Whether you're partying working out or plugging through another round of madden on xbox because bros Are not sony phonies But that's a shame that's a shame because brony is well, that's a different thing is a different thing

Now griffin it's possible That i'm now starting to suspect reading between the lines here that this article is written by someone uh a lot like us Because all of their sports memories and references are at least 20 years old There's no way that the person who wrote this is an actual bro Because there's no way at all When you reference joe montana in the super bowl, yeah, like it gets big it gets so much better find bro inspirations The image for this one is pretty good It's just two boys looking at a big blow up of a cover of mince journal featuring ryan lochte and michael felps

This is awesome for me every bro should have some famous bros look up to swipe lingo from and in general idolizes the pinnacles of brodom Some classics of bros Include ryan lochte and michael felps Guys one time I got kicked in the brodom It's so bad, uh tim tebow johnny manziel Derek jeter and chad johnson On new line will smith chanting tatum matthew mccanae. Do they hang? I don't gotta Gotta hang now. I could see mccanae and tatum because they were in the dancing movies together

I could see that one. They're making the danzig movie together. They're making the zanzik movie They're making the danzig movie together, of course And I believe I believe tatum is running as mccanae's uh vice uh governor Yeah, um assistant governor If I remember correct a bro veneer, excuse me The next one is the bros from epic mealtime and then finally just to wrap it all up And I would love to be a fly in this fucking wall of the room that these boys are in dain cook jim belushi and joe rogan What's that hang out? What is it?

I'ma open the door urk. What's that smell? What is this? What is the smell in this room dain jim and joe? What have you all been doing in here dame jim and joe? Who are your guys like bro idols? Who do you look up to when you're like you're hanging out with your bros and you're like This is who I want to be like. Oh man Fucking Malcolm Gladwell. Yeah, hell yeah

fucking Jimmy Carter Those two bros they love hanging out. Love to hang out. Fucking david copperfield Fucking Homer simpson. Yeah bromer simpson. Fucking jesus christ and brone and o' brian So that's that's that part and try to make guys try to make everyday epic A bros just like that's nice bros just like a regular dude except more exciting You got to be in constant search that next epic moment tweak every situation to make it just a little more perfect

Now I will say I have been in many a bar and location where bros have come in And there is I don't know that the word I would use is excitement But there is a definite. Oh no kind of feeling There is a what's about to happen now kind of feeling. Is that excitement? Is that or is it fight or flush? Let me give you some great examples here travis and these are just normal things I would suggest everybody does don't go out to dinner with your bros But make epic eating occasions Seek out 72 ounce steak eating challenges or spicy food eating challenges to make it competitive never let the loser live it down

Bro, wait, did you start off with don't go out to eat with your bros? Don't go out to dinner with your bros, but make epic eating occasions. Don't wait. No, let me go. Don't go to class Don't keep this is this is unprecedented Don't keep your grades up. Don't go to class. Seek out epic new ways of integrating information. You're misreading it There must be this is what it says Research and you've been handed a knockoff wiki how article. This cannot be this is from sticky how get out of here Hey, I just want to jump back real quick when they say don't go out to dinner with your bros But do like plan like 72 is it like there's a 72 ounce steak eating challenge

I would love to do that with you sometime, but we can't make plans to do it But if we both end up there, it's cool. It's just a spontaneous thing Um, don't go to class. Seek out epic new ways of integrating information research Optimum workout routines to maximize your learning retention and record lectures on your iPod while you multitask in the lecture hall. What? Um, work out in the lecture hall Make your presence in class epic by answering questions arguing with the prof and making your presence known Hey prof now this this seems like This is now headed towards how to be like a totally ripped

Uh, like figure in a god's not dead movie. Yes, but if God's not dead, how do you explain these gains? Yeah I've been worshiping at the iron temple and at the southern baptist church down the street Do we have the fortitude as an organization to release a t-shirt which reads God's not dead. How do you explain these games? I'm also realizing that the knot in there makes that wildly confusing God's not dead Now it makes it seem like these gains are a crime against God

So if God's not dead, if God was dead, the only way to have these gains is if How would a living god is dead? How would a living god An acquiesce to a challenge of his power. He would have put a stop to this You see these fucking gains my eyes on the throne God is dead. I killed him. I punched up way way up I got him guys. I punched up so hard. I got him Got him

Now, you know what? Whenever I say that and we don't actually make the shirt, someone else makes the shirt We'll have to make it now. I don't think we can make that shirt. It's probably best if we let that one go I'm gonna just tell mccage to start working on it right now. Don't mccage. Please don't uh There's a lot of fashion ones of how you can be like a athletic gear bro or a gentleman bro My favorite is my favorite's the motocross gentleman bro always leaves his calling card at the scene of a crime Try out the motocross bro gearhead metal listening so cal bros have their own style and vibe all together You can see these sorts of bros at the vans warped to tour or at the skate park Typically, they'll be decked out in the following entire long dickies short skate shoes like vans or airwalk flat brim hats

Black socks pulled all the way up. This is how many more about their long dickies Griffin It sounds like scob bro more than anything which is not included here um, and then the last part is like We want you to this is to keep your grades up of it and it's called avoiding stereotypes It includes tips such as drink responsibly treat women respectfully eat a well-balanced diet and drive responsibly I mean, yeah, all good. You're fine. But that just seems like human Responsibility they didn't start the article with this section for a reason because they wanted you to have like A lot of fun and like think about all the epic times that you can have with your bro

Yeah, yeah eating a big steak and then the spiciest food ever to give you Some sort of new scientifically advanced machoria That would be something that we could write about in medical journals um Friends bros always carry tums for their bros With with soft tummies I want to circle back to try to make every day epic because there's a bit I didn't read which is don't go on dates

Go on adventures dinner in a movie. That's for regular dudes Take the cutie from econ whitewater rafting or ask the hot barista at your favorite coffee shop to go to a metal concert tonight Take your semi serious date to the racquetball court and see what you're made of What does that mean? Hey, never ask anyone out and tell them that it's a semi serious date They won't be serious. Don't get weird. Don't get weird. You can't tell them. It's a semi charmed kind of date It's 15. That's a different thing 15 love. I love you. What? What?

Hey, lift up this you see me pick up a heavy thing. I do Let's see that big guy over there. I'm gonna pick him up. I'll pick up this bit. I'll pick up this bench Oh, man Uh, that's all I don't want to read any more of this But it is helpful. I think if you want to if you do want to live this life, you know, don't hurt anyone That's beautiful. Thank you. If you want to live this bro life and you want to be like You know pin pinnacle Pinnacle human Ryan Lochte

Then this is your chance to do that If you want to kick it in a room with dang cook jimbaluchi and joe rogan and what are they talking about in there? They're talking about Uh, what culture? Probably probably. I mean, let's be honest Fucking be it's jimbaluchi. Here's what the conversation is jimbaluchi. He's like, hey guys. Have I been cancelled? I feel like I should have been by now. It's I've got that vibe I feel like I don't know if I actually have been or not help

um Which okay, wait, hold on So I just want to talk about joe rogan jimbaluchi and jane cook for a second. Who do you think? No, no I have to know who is the connecting person there Right. Who what's the friend that they all know? Right. You can't tell me they all know each other equally, right? Is it dang cook better friend dang cook is friends with both of them Or is it joe rogan that's friends with both of them? It's gotta be that right? They were all actually, you know, it was they were all in that

12 angry men remake Oh, right, right, right. It's 12 angry 12 furious bros. Yeah, furious bros. Yeah God jimbaluchi was so fucking funny in that movie. Do you remember when we stabbed that? It is like there's no chance anyone else would have that knife and then you stab the knife down But it you know, it went into dang cooks hand and he was like Shit fucking challenging challenging stuff You know what I think is the most challenging comedy

When you say the same shit people have been saying for the last 20 years fucking challenging It's hard when you do that Because it's like you have to say it and like you have to say it in like a silly voice Right. It's hard to cut. It's really hard to come up with those And also we should be careful about um criticizing people for making the same jokes over and over again Because we've been doing this show for about 50 years. Yeah, but we make the same stupid Yeah, it's different Let's go to the stop making mean joke or we try to now the only people we're mean to is uh old straight

Well, every joke has a victim travis Yeah, I guess that's true You know now that you say it griffin, I think it's time to go to the money zone. Yeah Griffin you got any big summer plans you're gonna travel to like Italy or france or maybe yeah I was thinking about doing a sort of italy france Germany Spain those the whole circuit just getting the big four The big four as we call them. Well, griffin, it's probably a little too late now

But you should start working on babble to learn all four of those languages in time for your summer trip Oh, I know all of the languages to the country's you do. Did you use babble to do it? I did. Yeah, I learned italian and um, I learned all of them. Yeah Yeah Well, it actually makes a lot of sense because it only takes 10 minutes to complete a lesson So you can start having real live conversations in a new language as little as three weeks Now other language learning apps use ai for their lesson plan and their love is real, but they are not But babble lessons were created by over 150 language experts

All in one room also It was the tower of babble up and that's how they got the name Yeah, and they won a lot out till they solved it with babble You can choose from 14 different languages including spanish french italian and german right now Save up to 60 off your subscription when you go to babble.com slash my brother. That's b a b b e l dot com slash my brother For up to 60 off your subscription babble language for life Let's give them something to click about

something to click about That's the new song square space commission from us for $500,000 and it's uh, that's what we have so far At first they offered $500 and we said Take that and multiply it by a thousand as a joke We were like what about what about half a million and they were like yes, and we're like holy shit square space Yeah, um, but they I mean if they have that kind of money to throw around then you know that they are like The name in making a website for your brand or business or whatever You can make a beautiful website so easy engage with your audience sell anything you want your products

Anything you create a little cupcake that looks like alf Your paintings of your neighbors paintings of your neighbors shirts Add online booking and scheduling to your square space website clients can easily see your availability or reschedule if needed Taking the hassle out of coordinating calendars You could also put a calendar up there that says you have no availability Just a flex on all of the haters you can sell your products on an online store Oh, you sell physical or digital products

They got the tools you need to start selling online and you could also make videos pro level videos with the square space video studio app It's so easy and it's if you do anything else To make a video You're a numb nuts Will you please check out squarespace.com slash my brother for a free child with for a free child For a free child check out squarespace.com slash my brother for a free trial And when you're ready to launch use the offer code my brother to save 10 off your first purchase of a website or domain How lovely here with breaking news on a revolutionary form of entertainment professional wrestling

For more we go to our correspondent daniel raffer professional wrestling is the craze that's sweeping the nation featuring Visticuffs and colorful costumes But who can help us make sense of this world of body slams? Lindsay kelk has the answer sources tellers of an amazing podcast called tides and fights Filled with discussions of the absurdity of professional wrestling plus all the sincerity and hilarity that you could shake a stick at Listen to the tides and fights podcast every week find it on maximum fun or wherever you get your podcasts and your all-timey radio Hey there i'm ellen weatherford and i'm christian weatherford and we've got big feelings about animals that we just got to share On just the zoo of us your new favorite animal review podcast

We're here to critically evaluate how each animal excels and how it doesn't Rating them out of 10 on their effectiveness ingenuity and aesthetics Guest experts give you their takes informed by actual real life experiences studying and working with very cool animals Like sharks cheetahs and sea turtles It's a field trip to the zoo for your ears So if you or your kids have ever wondered if a pigeon can count Why sloths move so slow or how a spider sees the world find out with us every wednesday on just the zoo of us In its natural habitat on maximum fun dot org listen and subscribe wherever you get your podcasts

Hey, mr. Question man question question Yeah, i'd love to ask you a question travis. That's not what i said Fuck you make this so hard. It doesn't have to be this hard. I said question me a question Whip him up a question right now. You make this so hard loving me Or like the show in general where we at are you the victim wait the whole time is just him in the victim That actually makes perfect sense. Hey brothers. So i met this Girl that i think is pretty cool. All right, and well I

Yeah, bro. Yeah. Yeah pretty cool, huh? Yeah, i get it. What's her sense of humor like me. She's rich When talking to her one day you heard me when i showed her this cute frog picture i saw from instagram Now i love frogs like every other guy, but now what that's the weirdest sexism i've ever heard my entire life Like every other guy like you know every dude i love frogs now whenever i talked to her she only ever sends posts of frogs i'm not like super obsessed with frogs So how do i get out of this frog purgatory so i can move on from this frog talk Thanks brothers, and that's from frog friend frenzy Uh, you can start throwing some toads in there

Oh, yeah, and then oh and then like a salamander. Yeah walk it out to other sort of amphibians It's a salamander Uh, i think i wait what's the one that has like a filling neck for his amp. He's a straight-up fibian. Yeah Axolotl i think is another one that's amphib. Yeah, that's a that's a fibby. They love water Juicy got any fun frog? I don't know. You know how many frog facts, but i do want to say The problem is you got to open up a bit. Yeah, this is the only thing this person knows about there. It is Is your frog thing you got to let him know some other things about you that you care more about

Here's the good news It seems like she's invested in you and one way or another right she likes talking to you She was like this person like frogs. I'm gonna show them frogs Everybody's got like everybody's had that experience if you have a new uh a new relationship you're trying to foment and You're you're the fertilizer that you've chosen for it is like The one you just find one little bit of common ground. You know, this is actually that's Oh, you you have also seen

like You know All of os and you're like that you i have to make that my entire life right now for the rest of this conversation Like all i care about is os or else i'm not getting out of this conversation alive Like that kind of vibe and you've just done that a frog. It's it's so fun the way that you see human interactions. Justin It's so great Really, how do you mean trav go on please the idea of getting out of a conversation alive? It's just it's wonderful

Have you ever died at juice you ever died from a conversation? No, because i'm a fucking professional Because he's constantly got his head on a swivel exactly because i because i keep my shit I keep my fucking powder dry and my shit tight He's got one finger over the eject button at all times I don't go into a conversation without an x-fil plan right like of course it's fine I had a conversation we had There was a very nice gentleman that we met at the casino as we were or sorry, I guess it's resort, you know

after the show we there's a guy who's like The weirdest thing about the show is that it's in a self-contained location. So there's signs of us Like pictures of us big ones while you're all eating lunch or like going to the store Uh, there's no they put up one of me in the bathroom They're posters like our posters and this fella behind us in line to get coffee. He's like, hey You guys are the brothers and we're like, yeah, that's us. He's like, I didn't go to this show But I thought about it. I was like, okay. What kind of show is it? We're like, let's kind of bad advice show

And he was like, oh, okay. And and then like three minutes pass And he came back to us and he was like I'm sorry. Can you just give me an example of the kind of question? Yeah, oh my heart is racing right now. I know right travis stepped in And travis does not have my sort of like hang up So he's able to just actually talk to people

But he that he goes in a little hot sometimes and he said well like last night we had one where A person's partner was drinking too much milk. Uh-huh and he's like Okay Oh see jesson, let me tell you what I was thinking in that moment when that was my answer This person wants an excuse to not listen to our show Right, like we're all really interested We are all all of us looking for excuses to not listen to a podcast

Right the name of the show is literally plastered all over the place, right? Yeah So if you wanted to be like do I care enough about it? So I was like, I'm gonna give you the lowest bar. I can think of We had a question about milk and if you're like, I know okay That was all I needed to to bump me off of it. You're welcome. Also I was very sleepy and I didn't want to talk anymore So I thought someone asks us about milk was a good like we can all agree. Well, that's well that sounds terrible. Yeah. Yeah Da, da. Da. Da. That oh

Okay I want to munch Squ world I want to munch Tell bar bar bar bar bar. I want to munch munch munch I want too munch munch, much much much bunch much much SQUAD!

Oh, okay. Thanks, guys. Justin, you can't think where you're going with you on that. That's my Beach Boys, because it's the summertime and we got a lot of summer menu offerings. No, like, slam dunk, huge announcements, but I do just want to tell you guys what's going on out there. Please. This isn't funny, but Dunkin' is bringing back the stuffed everything bagel minis.

Oh, I do love those. They're good. Yeah, I fucking love those. They're good. They're good, they're good. They're good. They're good. They're good.

Yeah, they're good. They're good. They're good. They're good. I don't know if you know, they're good. Hey. They also got brown sugar cream cold brew. It's good.

Hey, Justin. Hey, Justin, when, like, are there just episodes of Munch Squad where you're actually, and you can tell me, because I'm your brother, are you being paid by Dunkin? Justin, you being paid by Dunkin? I'm just saying it's good. I'm letting you know it's good. Uh-huh. Put Justin.

Justin. Real quick check-in. Did they send you like a t-shirt or? I'm going to talk about BK real quick. I'm pivoting BK. This is beginning June 27th. So this should time out actually pretty good. This is hot, hot news for you, the listener.

They got some new offerings for the summer. There's current they got the rate for this. Yeah, yeah, man. The Southwest bacon whopper junior. It features a flame grill beef patty with avocado spread, crispy bacon, seasoned tortilla strips, American cheese, lettuce, sliced white onions, juicy tomatoes and creamy spicy sauce on the toast. It says we see but now that sounds like a good offering.

You know, that's like those flavors seem on trend, you know, as much as on trend. Well, yeah, so adding Southwest stuff to food really hot right now. I love that. If you live in like New Mexico and they're like, it's a Southwest burger. Do you think New Mexico is like again? Give me like a Northeast burger. Um, I want a burger with oysters on it. Uh, now here's the one that's a little bit.

The impossible Southwest bacon burger. That features an impossible flame grilled impossible patty made from plants with avocado spread, seasoned tortilla strips, American cheese, crispy bacon. Huh. Hey guys. Huh. A weird kickflip. Hey guys.

Huh. Hey, you guys, hey guys, you know what that's for, right? You know what the bacon is, right? You know what? No, it's from bacon. What do you mean? Oh, no, no, we did a good job. It's bacon.

It's just bacon. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, I know guys. It tastes so good and it's not like beef. No, you're right there. It's not beef, but you can all see. Oh, man. Yeah. So there, I just thought that was amazing that they're like, yeah, yeah, yeah,

we got it. You know what they call it? That's for people who are looking for flexitarian options. Oh, okay. So that's not any force. Yeah. People just want to eat whatever kind of hoes in their field of view. So that's a summer offering.

They got a bacon, a vegetarian bacon or a BK. So everybody's just trying stuff. Speaking of just trying stuff, White Castle is welcoming the summer with chicken rings. Chicken, sorry, just you misspoke. So chicken rings, the crispy, uniquely shaped chicken rings are made with all white meat chicken and they're sure to leave Cravers satisfied while not taking a big bite out of their wallets. If you find yourself craving chicken rings, you should just seek help and don't bite

your wallet. No. Here's Jamie. I mean, unless, unless you're like setting a bone in like a wilderness scenario and you need to bite down on something, then like you've dislocated the shoulder while running away from like the predator, bite down on your wallet so you don't like swallow your tongue. I could see that.

Jamie Richardson, vice president at White Castle, seems to have conflated the restaurant with some sort of eldritch text. Let's check in with Jamie. A hot and tasty meal at an appetizing price is how we feed the souls of Craver generations everywhere. Craver generations, the Craver generation, the souls of Craver generations, the chicken rings are delicious and fun to eat and will help Cravers enjoy a hot summer treat while not breaking the bank.

Can you imagine a world? Where they made chicken rings, but they were expensive. Why would you do that? Hey, it's me, Jamie from White Castle. So these chicken rings, each ring, individual ring, does cost $20. But the reason is we realized it was easier to simply genetically modified chickens to grow in kind of a slinky shape. A tubular sort of shape.

And that science cost a lot to guys. Um, and you know, and nowhere did we stop to think if we should. Um, and that one's on us, uh, but you're going to love these hollow chicken parts. It's fine. White Castle is going on. This is still Jamie, who's like, they were out of the office and Jamie's like, wait, I thought of something else to say. Come back.

White Castle is going all out this summer to deliver quality meals at a great price point, the pairing of three favorites, chicken rings, bacon and Hidden Valley original ranch. Yeah, yeah, dude. Is a tasty treat that will satisfy cravings throughout the season. That's right. They're putting the chicken rings on tiny sandwiches. Yeah, dude.

Cause they're White Castle and they fuck. I was going to say they don't fuck around, but they only fuck around here at White Castle. We believe that fast food can exist without a victim. So welcome. The job of fast food is to offend fast food cannot exist without a victim. Hey, get there and get these offerings. You've earned it.

And hey, speaking of other things you've earned, you've earned this show. You're welcome. By listening to it, by trading us the time for it. And we thank you so much for that, for, for being here and, and enjoying the show with us and having some fun and laughs and never punching up or down, just punching wildly around. Sometimes we don't even punch. Sometimes we're just feeling like that little boy from Secret Garden.

They're like, I think they're bad all the time. And we're like, papa, bring me some tea. I don't feel like punching today. That's a sweet, sweet thought. I do think if we tried pretty hard, we could enumerate a list of people we did punch at today, beginning with being himself. But also, I believe some things were said about Dan Cook's character that he would not enjoy so much.

Who else? Who else really got it? Who else did we really fucking razz this time? We, we gave that nice boy, Rick, your face. All right. Thank you to Montaigne for the use of our theme song. My life is better with you. Great times, great oldies.

It's a noose. It is a new song. And thanks to Maximum Phone for having us on the network. Go to maximumphone.org, you goof. Check out all the great shows they have on there. Dialed. Pre-orders. Pre-orders are open for the Taz 11th hour, the graphic novel.

You can go to theadventureszonecomic.com to pre-order now. That comes out February 21st. And like we mentioned earlier, we got stops coming up for the 20 rendezvous fancy takes flight tour. You can get all those tickets at bit.ly slash McRoy Tours. Our next stops are Salt Lake City, Portland, then San Diego. And then the next tour after that is Washington, DC, Detroit and Cincinnati. Mask and proof of full vaccination or negative COVID test was in 72

hour of event start is required. Get those tickets at bit.ly slash McRoy Tours. You've only got a few days left to grab, you know, the merch. I mean, it will still be there, the merch at the merch store, but you only have a few days left for 10% of all merch proceeds to go to Fairness WV, which is a statewide civil rights advocacy organization dedicated to fair treatment and civil rights for lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender West Virginians. All of that at McRoyMerch.com.

Hey, quick programming note. He talked about it on Wonderful this week, but Rachel and I are going to be moving at the end of July to Washington, DC. Are yeah. Yeah, we're moving on up to DC. But I just bought a house in Austin. Well, good news for you. You can sell it for a billion dollars.

Yay. And yeah, we I only mentioned that because we're probably going to be running a couple of live shows in a row toward the end of July to sort of cover us as we relocate cross country. But yeah, just quick programming note for you. And now you're in. Now you're now you're a part of it. The fandom, the moment.

The movement. The Griff and McRoy ARG. Yeah. Griff, I would love to hear your. I did. I started this episode doing Rowan Atkinson by about for about 15 minutes. So can I get, can I get a car? Can I get me one?

I'll do one. Yeah, Traff. Can you do you? Dane, Dax, Shepard is stung by a bunch by a bunch of bees. Yeah, Dax, Shepard in Mississippi. OK. Oh, man, I hate this. Oh, God, oh, my eyeball.

Oh, God, everything's flashing before me. Now that is a mistake. OK, give me a different one. Give me a different one for you, but my name is Justin McRoy. I'm Travis McRoy. I'm Griffin McElroy. It's been my brother, my brother, me kiss your dad square on the lips. It's better with you.

It's better, it's better with you. It's better, it's better with you. This is true. It's better, it's better with you. It's better, it's better with you. Maximumfun.org Comedy and Culture. Artist owned.

Audience supported.