My Brother, My Brother And Me - MBMBaM 646: Fart Power to the Max

Episode Date: February 6, 2023

We’re FINALLY bringing that energy. The kind of energy you find in a one-drink coffee shop someone invested all of their life savings into. The kind of energy you bring to impersonate your grandma. The kind of energy perfect for a very short sketch show writer's room.Suggested talking points: Cup-a-Chino, Boat Ingredients, The Grandma Inhabiting Me, Remember When Time?, MILF and Cookies, How to Draw Sports Cars that Look Like Your Dad, You Can’t Have UpwallsFoundation for Black Women’s Wellness: http://ffbww.org/

The McElroy brothers are not experts, and their advice should never be followed. Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it. Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mention only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby? To a precious friendship I could've never seen what was coming for me Hangs at the skate park, hangs by the beach My life, it feels like

It's better, it's better with you My life, it's better, it's better with you This is true, it's better, it's better with you My life, it's better with you Hello everybody and welcome, my brother, my brother, me and advice show for the Modron era. I'm your oldest brother, Justin McElroy. Oh, me? Thanks for asking. I'm your middle brother, Travis McElroy. And I am your sweet baby brother, Griffin McElroy.

I'm gonna be bringing a different energy to the show today. Okay. It feels like it's time, Justin. Me and Travis, our energies have been on a journey often entwined. It's growing a little stale, you're current energy. But I'll tell you what I am excited about, cause I love when they do this in TV shows or movies for that matter. When we don't see the character growth arc happening, it's like, well, I've been watching this character. They've been on every episode for a hundred episodes. Where is this coming from? Where's this? I don't understand this shift, but I'm excited for it cause it's way past due, just what do you got?

I've been watching a lot of videos by Morgan Eckeroff. There's a coffee genius. And Morgan was talking about some ways to sort of spice things up in your coffee. In the bedroom. In your coffee routine. Okay. And... Both, those are the same thing for me. It's a dangerous game we're playing. Yeah, sometimes Griffin just dips his dick into that coffee and pass on that, all that.

But Morgan on one of... Don't knock it, tell you've tried it. What? If you do it twice, then the ER, the ER nurses, they let the police know that the coffee guy is back. Morgan talked about how to make a... I don't know if you guys know about this, but a cappuccino. A monkey? All right. No, a cappuccino. It's a...

A cup of jeans? They got a cappuccino here! Yeah, so Griffin, you know about it. It's a... What you do is you get... That Ryan Atwood is one tall cappuccino. You spend... What you do is you spend $17. Yes, this isn't for everyone. You spend $17 on a milk frother on Amazon. And then you froth up the milk and dump it on the coffee. And what they... This is very big in Italy.

Oh my... What they call it is a cappuccino. So the foam, all of it, is going to be bringing a different elegance and refinement to my energy for the show, because I'm having a cappuccino. Now, Justin, I will say, even though $17 for a milk frother... Sorry, I have one second chance. I got a little bit of foam in my mustache. He's worked hard for this. I just thought I'd let you try it, and maybe I could talk for a little bit.

No, no, I just got a little bit of foam in my mustache. I was so embarrassed. Okay, well, okay. A $17 milk frother seems expensive at first, but then I think about all the money that this would save me. I spend so much money a year buying fancy coffee drinks. Like what? Oh, I buy... Sometimes I have a Lattie. I've been known to have a Macca.

I do all of them. Well, try this. If you enjoy those, you must try a cappuccino. I cannot wait, because at this one, I think I probably could have bought several houses for the amount of money that I spend on fancy coffee drinks. You can't get this in stores. Oh, really? This is one you're making on your own. It's sort of an elegant foam and coffee mixture. Griffin, have you tried a cappuccino?

No, I enjoy my lates with this. How are you, milk? Now, Justin, if you try to... This is another... It's a version of the cappuccino where you... It's just like whipped cream or foam, and it's cappuccino. Oh, but that sounds divine! Yes, there's also another version where you kind of blend it with ice, and it's called a frappuccino. Oh, that sounds a bit common for my taste. You see, in the video I watched, Morgan marinated cereal in milk, and then Morgan used that milk to make the cappuccino. That's a step in the recipe.

Yeah, it's a step in the recipe I forgot, is you have to do that. And then, if you're like me, maybe a little bit of a terrini sugar-free salted caramel syrup from a Kroger. Hey, Justin, can I talk to you for a second about how you said he marinated cereal in milk? Yes. Perhaps that was not the verb that you wanted. No, that is what... That's what they did. But it wasn't to cook the cereal afterwards, Justin. It wasn't to loosen up the protein strands, the tenders and the fibers and whatnot inside of there to make it more tender.

It was to give it... So, wouldn't it be it soaked... Wait, would you soak... You drained the life from the cereal in milk. Oh, no. I have a question. Yes, Griffin, have you ever tried... I was wondering if I needed to... If the cups I have now will suffice or if I need to buy special cups when I start to make my own cappuccino. Okay, that's a... No, I like Griffin's the best.

That's actually a great question about this beverage. Say it now. I use a traditional cup for this, which is to say a Theodore Lasso mug Taylor got me for Christmas year before last. So that is the traditional cup, I think. It's similar to the style of a traditional cup. So that's what I use. All my cups just look far too large and ugly for this lovely petite little drink with a hat. Oh, you could use one of your, like, children's cup.

I have a sky from the Paw Patrol mug that I think sounds like the perfect size to me. That sounds perfect. The thing I realize... This is my understanding of the cappuccino. Is that... The what? You can use any liquid. What are you talking about now? The cappuccino.

Thank you. You can use any liquid you want to in it. Wait, replacing which liquid? All the liquids are replaceable. If you have the milk frother, any liquid will froth perfectly. Really? Given enough patients. And time?

Yes. Right. When a drink reaches a certain frothiness index, it has become... Then it is a cappuccino. Oh, okay. So this is... We're talking about a state of matter at this point where there's, like, liquid gashes cappuccino. Guys, bad news.

I've been savoring this so heartily. I'm starting to get to the bottom of it and the foam has largely dissipated and it's just pedestrian coffee in my mouth. Well, don't drink it all the way down. Read the grounds at the bottom to see what the feature holds. Oh, it says make another... And sometimes they put a joke in there. Let me look.

Okay. It's in Esperanto, but it says make yourself another delicious cappuccino. Yeah. I'm actually... It's funny. I'm in the studio today. We haven't been in here in a while because of COVID, but the lawyers are here and they're just pointing to a big sign that says Bean Juice 2.0 on it with a big, like, no sign.

No, don't do this. And they're pointing at it and they're shaking their heads. You guys can't have another fire sale. Oh, wait, right over there. Look, Derrick, our in-house barista, is pointing at the sign that says Bean Juice 2.0. Yes. Okay. And he's really into it because he doesn't have a lot of work to do lately.

So that is going to be the tenor of the show today, a lot more elegance and a lot more refinement. Cool. Badass. I like it. Can I be the same? Yeah, you can be this. If you want to be this same. I tried to get in on that bit, you guys, but I was like Jimmy fucking Fallon over here just

cracking up. I was trying. I was like, maybe I'll be a customer at there, but I was too busy busting up at YouTube. Well, hold on. Now, let's not stray too far. I would love to... No, I'm saying I can't. I can't.

I can't do that. Try and skit right now, group. Okay. Yeah. I'll be the owner. I'll be the owner. No, we got this. No, wait, hold on.

I have to say, we're recording this in audio only for the first time in quite some time, due to technical difficulties. And I do, I'm realizing in this moment, I have come to rely on being able to see my brother's facial expressions, or they're like, cut it out sign, or like the, I don't want to do sign. Or they get up and walk away sign. Yeah. Yeah.

So I'm going to be the owner who sunk my life savings into this. Every penny that my mama left me. Justin, you're the kind of pretentious barista who knows exactly what they think the customer should wear. Now, just Griffin, you're just your plain old average customer, and you just want a simple, drip coffee, and sing. Welcome. Welcome to Coffee Stop.

My name is John Luke. How can I help you today? Hey, what kind of coffee do you have today? No, only. Have you had it? You must. Hey. No, the word, the word sounds you over here.

Yes, boss. I'm ordering. Yeah. We don't just have cabuccinos. I'm ordering. Excuse me, sir. Excuse me, sir. Wait, you're trying.

Hey, my name is Jeremy Coffee Stop. I want to have, I want to talk to you in this way, my own. When you get a drink here, you go in through the front door, you get in the back of the line. I don't know how. I own this coffee. This is my shop. My name's on the, on the shop.

Excuse me. This is going on TikTok, and you are both the Karens from my perspective, and I'm trying to enjoy a delicious coffee, and I'd like you to keep it down. Gene, what are you talking about? You just said you don't have it. You just said you don't have coffee. What do you mean? I said we have cappuccino.

You said you had, yeah, you guys keep saying these words. Oh my God. He's got a gun. They sound like small. This is something, this is for later. This is different than this situation. Oh, he's waving $100 bills around Gene. We should give him whatever he wants.

Okay. This is a very, oh, this is, I thought we were on a million, like a, a TikTok about Karens. We're in one of those like rich people versus very rich people TikToks. Oh, I love that. Hey Griffin, can you show us how a very rich person would have dealt with the news that they only had cappuccinos? Yeah.

Sure, sure, sure. Try again. Okay. I'm sorry, but will you only have cappuccino? Oh, that was a shame. I was hoping that you all had moon water. Oh my God. Elon Musk.

No, I don't even want to pretend. No, you have to. Because the fact that he only drinks moon water is good. Yeah. No, it's what us the riches have now. They found some water up there and they were like, melt that shit down. And then I drink that. I have to.

I can't start my day without a big cup of moon water. I hear what keeps you super regular. No, it, no, it's got rocks in it. Uh, this is an advice, but it's a hundred million dollars. What a sketch. Um, my brother works on commercial ships in the Gulf of Mexico. He'll cook meals for his crew sometimes to help out and have fun. And lately his crock pot chili creation that he found online has gotten very popular amongst

the crew. He let me know about this. And in the same set of messages, if for me, he's telling the whole crew, I made the recipe. The thing is, no, I didn't. My brother and I don't swap recipes on top of that. I do make a good chili, but it's definitely not what he's been making on the boat with their boat ingredients.

Brothers, how do I find a way to um, actually the situation or accept my newfound fame amongst the ship's crew as a mythical figure of great cooking prowess? That's from cooking in California. And I will say this is a singular dilemma. The likes of which we have not encountered on the program. I would also say it's also a fairly, how often are you coming in contact with the crew of the boat that your brother works on in the Gulf of Mexico, that you're having to keep this lie up to such a strenuous degree that you're not sure if you can live with it or

not. The Gulf of Mexico is not touching California. Okay. Thank you, Mr. Wizard. A lot of people are not super great on geography. So I'm just going to say that one doesn't do that. That one doesn't. Little sus.

I say something. I followed the clues. They didn't add up. I say you take the W. Let them think about your, this great chili cooks that they like and they like it. If they, if you said your brother claimed you made it and they hated it, then I would think you would have a, you would have a case. You would, you should contact a lawyer at that point.

I'd better call Saul. I haven't seen it, but I think that's what the show's about. But I think if they like it and your brother gave you credit, you take that credit and you bank it. Yeah. Um, I also just want to say what a life. Just on the, just on the, the ocean, day in, day out, cooking chili. I don't think they do chili every day, Griffin.

Every day, breakfast, lunch and fucking dinner, chili, chili, chili every single time. The crew is so sick, but what a life. Just exploring the waves. Yeah. I'll tell you what. The ventilation on a boat is different than I thought it was the good judging by this because I wouldn't think that you would want that kind of, um, struggling for word other than transformation.

I mean, fart power to the max, uh, in a boat. It doesn't seem like. Yeah. This one's fart power to the max. For sure. For sure. Yeah. Welcome aboard.

No. Don't stand over there. This one's fart power to the max. If you know what I mean, it's not a euphemism. I understand that phrase because I was worried I was the only one that knew about it. Part power to the max. No. We learned about that in boating school.

Yeah. Well, I mean, Juice, that was the only brand of t-shirts that you would wear throughout most of high school. I still remember that, that XXL white, white t-shirt just read, don't fake the funk on a nasty dark and then on the back, fart power to the max. Yeah. Yeah. You had that one that also on the front had Bart Simpson on it and he was saying fart

power to the max. And then on the back was just a big cross. Yeah. But it was spelled out, it was the word fart power, that was when it started right down to the max. It was spelled out in letters, which I appreciated and I'm sure God appreciated. And then on the back, there was the cross and then it said number 23 on it and it had the Nike symbol.

Yeah. That was a good shirt. Yeah, it was a good shirt. I wish I still had that one. I don't know what happened to all my shirts. How expensive would it be for us to start making and selling that shirt? I've just described it. With Bart Simpson on it?

Because I think that how to get pretty expensive pretty quickly, I would say if we sold one with Bart Simpson on it. I'm almost positive the cross is fair use. You could do that. I don't think that's trademarked. The Nike symbol, we could just do it backwards. Yeah, flip it. They wouldn't catch it then.

I think if you change Bart's appearance slightly, it's fine if we round off the top of his hair instead of spiky. I think it's cool. Give him glasses, maybe a t-shirt that says not Bart. Not Bart. Not Bart. That's good. Won't workshop it with the lawyers because I have them here today.

Whoa. Juice. Yeah, and you hit the mute button halfway through, which may sound like we disappeared. It was the wildest thing I've ever heard. You were just like, yeah, that would be a great t-shirt. That's the sound Justin makes when he folds in on himself into nothingness. That was cool. The sound was much faster than I thought it would be.

I don't have a mute button. I just have my old potentiometer here that I got a lower by hand. No, I'm not ragging you, man. I thought it was cool. I think we are not recording a video. I thought you had just stood up and done like a big kick in the air. Or maybe been attacked by somebody who if we had been able to see our video, we could have warned you that they were staying behind you.

Who then very quickly replaced you for all we do. We are speaking to Justin's assassin right now. No, no, no, no, no, no, no. Just you, huh? The wizard has some great stuff for us today. I feel like I didn't help that person at all. I didn't. Just take the W.

Take the W. Let's take the win. Take the win. Your legend continues. You've had so much shit go wrong lately. Yeah, you're out there. You need this. Yeah.

What a life, though. What a life. Siobhan sent this in. Thanks. Is how to write a letter to grandma. Do you want to make your grandma really happy? Yeah. Yeah?

Yeah, sure. That's always sort of front of mind for me personally, like top priority. I mean, in a perfect world, something would make us both happy at the same time. I mean, if I'm being honest, because there's no such thing as pure altruism. So, like, I would make grandma happy and me happy simultaneously. They just announced a Matlock reboot with Kathy Bates. That's sure to do the job. That makes both me and grandma happy.

It makes America happy. One of the easiest ways to do this is to write her a nice letter to thank her for a gift. Tell her what's happening in her life, or just let her know you're thinking of her. Yeah. Cool. I mean, that's easy enough. That's all true. I could text her.

One, start off with... I could text her, though. No, letter. Gotta be. Text won't get there, Trav. Start off with an opener. Dear beloved grandmother. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah.

What up? Nope. The only one that they've listed here. This is the shortest article I've ever seen, gang. Start off with an opener. Dear beloved grandmother, comma, dot, dot, dot, dot, dot, et cetera. Whoa. So we'll stick with that one.

Something like Dear Beloved Grandmother. Most cherished grandmother. Does kind of make it sound like you forgot her name. It does kind of. It does sound like someone has kidnapped you and is right, is just sort of cold calling a grandma. Dear fellow grandma. Indent the paragraph, then write a beginning for the letter.

Thanks for action. Or you could start off with... Remember when time... Now, hold on. Wait, thanks for action? Thanks for action? You really did it, grandma. Thanks.

I like the way you acted. What an incredible adventure, grandma. I can't believe we went inside a movie screen together. It's not the bad guys. Thanks for action, grandma. That was amazing. Hey, remember that time when... Remember when time...

And also, so far, your advice is indent paragraph and then begin writing. Are you sure this isn't just how to write a letter to someone? How to format a letter? I mean, I think it's good practice to write a letter to your beloved most cherished grandmother. And then you can kind of just change the names around whenever you need to use it to apply to a job. But whatever you do, please don't forget to indent it or it could kill your grandma. The shock of seeing words begin at the margin. Oh, boy, it could take her away to the river sticks.

And she doesn't have any coins on her eyes. So Kyron's not going to let her over on his raft. You know what I mean? Yeah, for sure. Yeah. Yeah, I definitely know what you mean. Fill the body of the letter with the facts, opinions, and special moments of her. Whoa.

Hey, grandma, here's some of your opinions. I hated writing these in my own handwriting. Please don't ever let anyone see this. These are the facts that contradict them when you think about it for even like a second, grandma. Even for like just a fraction of a second, you could get there yourself, I bet. I love just filling a letter with the facts and opinions of someone else. But remember when you won the volleyball tournament? That was a special moment.

Thanks for that action. And then remember what you said to me about that one person who was on the opponent's team after? That was not a special moment. Just to remind you, your opinions could use a revision. Thank you very much, grandma. Write your closing paragraphs. Write something like in conclusion. Or lastly, this hints.

In conclusion, I do need to borrow $50. It's real tough out here. Yeah. This hints her that your letter is coming to a close. Bring back the reason you wrote the letter. Don't you hate that when you're reading a letter and it just stops and you're like, Oh, man. Whoa.

I was still going 60 miles an hour. Whiplash. Dear grandma, remember when we watched whiplash together and laughed and laughed. Your closing should look something like this. I thank you for the object because it is one of the best things I have ever received. You are the kindest woman in my life. See you soon. Love name.

Word for word. Just copy and paste that. It's ready to go. Don't change a thing. This is like the A.I. Write a letter to your grandma for you. It's real. It couldn't be easier.

Now, that would be a good use of A.I. Yeah. That's the only use that I am interested in right now. Yeah. They'll probably plagiarize a bunch of, you know, well-meaning grandma letter authors. I did not give you permission for my words. It didn't pay any of those kids. So, here's how to ask your granny to come visit.

Start with dear beloved granny slash grandmother. Obviously. So, this one, they do allow you a little bit of freedom if you want to call them granny or grandma. Or Mrs. McElroy like we do. Or Mrs. McElroy, yes. Write about your favorite dishes that she prepares if you like food. Oh, yes. Oh, you say like, I love your blaze and hot wings.

And oh, if you could only come make them for my birthday party this Saturday. My little, my little Daniel knows. Oh, Grandma, I love your trash can nachos. My little Daniel knows me so well. He knows that I know he likes food. What a special letter this is. He really knows the facts and opinions about me. I love your jalapeno pig poppers, Grandma.

Please give me a wrap. I love your lobster lollipops, my beloved Grandma. The way that you make foie gras out of cotton candy, I love it. Come visit, Grandma, please. Love name. The Guy Fieri has, the Guy Fieri restaurant has an item called pig poppers, right? I don't think it's a functioning entity anymore. I mean, I think.

Fuck yeah, it is. It's right next to Capital One Arena here in D.C., baby. And they got them. They got flavor towns in Vegas. I think it was New York location that couldn't. The Times Square one could. It was overpopulated and the infrastructure, the building fell apart because too many people went there. Listen, if Mars 2020 can't stay open, whatever year it was.

If that. Mars 2008. It can't be 2008. That's not right. That was it. It opened in 2009. It was about the past. So here's some badass tips here in step three.

Take care with your writing. There are some things to bear in mind when writing the letter, such as, don't be too sentimental while writing. This spoils the natural effect of your message. Grandma's hate that. Grandma's do not like that. Look at this flowery shit. Get this off of my page. I'm busy watching American Ninja Warrior.

I can't get distracted by all this poetry. Don't give bad expressions about anyone whom she loves. What did you say about Perry Mason, you piece of shit? Don't avoid, sorry, do avoid, wow, that would be wild if it said don't avoid using slang or curse words. But it does say do that. Yeah. Yeah. I fucking love you, Grandma.

I fucking love you too, Jeremy. I hate to get sentimental, Grandma, but I fucking love you and I fucking hate pints. Okay, well, I agree with you. He's a stinker. I agree with you on one of those points and I won't see which. I don't love you. Whoa, just to make it clear, Jess, you've always been my least favorite. Hey, here in our second skit of the episode, can we take a moment?

No, no, no. Oh, sorry, I was, I was method. Yeah, but you were like a weird kind of met like a mean kind of listen Griffin. It wasn't me at that point. I was channeling the character like you had, you had to understand. So, um, Jared Leto was telling me all about this and he taught me. Yeah. It's not you.

Like when he left to use condoms and old fish on people's doorstep, it was because that wasn't even him doing it. Yeah. The Joker did it. The Joker made him do that. Do you understand that? And so I love fictional letter writer, Jeremy, but the grandma that was, let's call it is inhabiting me doesn't.

Yeah. I get it, man. What are you about to say about skits Griffin? They're good and funny and this show should only be them. This is kind of a writer's room for a much shorter skit show that we, you know, normally people watching us every, uh, uh, Thursday night at 1115 on free V when our, our very short sketch show airs. But that's the thing.

If I was sat down in a circle of other writing professionals and someone came in the room and we're like, okay, guys, we need 30 jokes for by Saturday. I think that would be easier than sitting in a room with you two and just, I don't know what's going to be expected of me every time we sit down here in the studio together. I mean, I've been trying to do salty grandma for a while. Yeah. He's been trying to get the heat. He made all the salty grandma was, you must admit a way for a thin concept.

You would never flush it out. I did have some character growth ideas. It's more about the way other people react to her than what she says, if that makes any sense. She's a chaotic force that acts upon others. You get it? I, I, I mean, I do now, but that stuff. She's also an alien.

See, cool. Now I want to know. I wasn't going to say that until like the fourth. Okay. Well, let's walk the skit back a little bit then. To write before the big alien reveal. Okay. Well, no, just you put the alien reveal in there.

Some like, Whoa. But diagetic. Diagetic. Say the thing. This is the second podcast I've been on with you today that I've heard you use the word diagetic. Well, maybe shit should stop being so fucking diagetic all the time.

That's a good point. Griffin, say the thing about loving grandma and hating my pants. Okay. I love grandma. I love, I hate Mike Pence. I agree with you on one of those. I don't love you. I'm an alien.

You're just playing off your star man soundboard there. That was obviously Jeff Bridges for the hip film. Star man in that great scene where he reveals that he's an alien by saying I'm an alien. And I paid $50,000 for the rights to use that on this podcast and you're fucking blowing up my spot so hard that I said the right Jeff. It's one of them. It's okay. It's okay.

Torrent Goldblum. Nobody. Torrent. Torrent. He was an alien and a different movie about how Earth Girls are promiscuous. Okay. I'm pretty torrent now. So let's take a brief break and head on over to the money zone.

Okay. Quick guys, we locked Travis in a steamer trunk. We only have a couple of minutes to tell you about Bombas for some reason. He doesn't want you to know about these socks. So we had to lock him in a steamer trunk. He got, we started to talk about these socks and he got out of baseball bat and we were like, dude, chill out. Chill out.

I don't know what his problem is. Maybe he doesn't like socks, underwear, t-shirts that feel cozy, like a fireplace, soft like a cloud. I'm wearing Bombas right now, folks. If you have not treated yourself to the woman Rino's. Oh boy. I like a nice, like nice, like calf length wool Marino. Yeah.

Oh boy. Call me Dan Marino because I'm kicking a touchdown for comfort. Yeah. I will do, I will only call you Dan Marino for the rest of the ad spot. They got all kinds of stuff and not only can you get really comfy stuff from Bombas. Socks, underwear and t-shirts are the number one, two and three most requested items in homeless shelters. And that's why for every comfy item you purchase, Bombas donates another comfy item to someone

experiencing homelessness. It's, it's, it's really good stuff. I just bought actually a bunch of Bombas socks because I needed to re-up my supply and they got fun patterns. Oh boy. Fun colors, comfy feelings, lengths to your, to your specifications. Whatever you need. Bombas has got you as long as what you need is underwear and, you know, the aforementioned

item t-shirts, you know, the whole thing. Go to Bombas.com slash my brother and use code my brother for 20% off your first purchase. That's B-O-M-B-A-S.com slash my brother and use code my brother at checkout. Now that, oh. Guys, please. Oh, that's true. We really got to speed this up Griffin. Did you drill holes in the trunk like I asked?

No. Oh my God. How quickly can we tell people about Squarespace? I know you put some sticks and leaves in there to recreate his natural environment. Yeah. I got some, I have some gravel, some colorful gravel in there. Some colorful gravel. Some dirt.

Some pineapple from SpongeBob that you can mess with. Some aphids. Yeah. He's got everything he needs and everything you need in a website design platform. That's Squarespace. Yeah. We love this service. We've been using it for many years.

I have built websites. I have edited websites and it honestly, even for someone who's not traditionally brilliant like myself to figure it out, it's not hard. You're dragging and dropping these cool looking elements that are all already designed by people who know what they're doing. So it's just you put the things in there and it looks great because people design them to look great, people who know what they are doing. And you can do whatever with these websites.

It's not just a vanity project about how big your muscles are. You can sell stuff. Yeah. You can make pro level videos, I heard. Yeah. The Squarespace video studio app. Yeah. It helps you make and share engaging videos to tell your story, grow your audience and

drive sales, even if you're a fucking Mondo dumbass like Justin. Wow. This took a weird turn, but Squarespace is ready for weird turns. No matter how many weird turns you want to put in your website, they got you. Oh, you could do blogging there. You can share stories, your videos, share your life with a Squarespace website. Head to squarespace.com slash my brother for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code my brother to save 10% off your first

purchase of a website or domain. Oh, Russ. Thank you. Oh, I'm glad I found you in line. These clouds are really freaking me out. I hate having to stand in line. And boy, what a line. These giraffes do not smell good.

No, they do not. And they've set short nets. But I'm hearing we need to get on this arc. We've got to get on the arc. It is about to rain. God is about to destroy humanity. Hey, oh, sorry, sorry, sorry. Are you Noah?

Yeah, I know we look like humans, but we're podcasters. Yes, totally. We are podcasters, so it's different. Have you heard of Oh No, Ross and Kerry? We investigate spirituality, claims of the paranormal, stuff like that. And you have a boat and say the world's going to end. So it seemed like something for us to check out. We would love to be on the boat.

We came two by two. What do you think? Oh No, Ross and Kerry available on maximumfun.org. I have chills. I'm going to give you 15 points. All that and so much more on Troubled Waters. Find it on maximumfun.org or wherever you choose to listen to podcasts. Okay.

Yeah. No, I can't. I want to merge. Squad. Squad. I want too much. Squad. It's becoming very progressive.

Very fusion. The voice though was very much like a Nickelodeon 90s animation thing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's a good thing. It's a good thing. It's a good thing. It's a good thing. It's a good thing.

It's a good thing. It's a good thing. Nickelodeon 90s animation thing. It's experimental. It's under there. Welcome to Munch Squad. It's a podcast within a broadcast. What?

Profile is the latest and greatest in brand eating. I have two stories for you today. The first, we've never really had a sort of like protagonist in Munch Squad. You know what I mean? I think that the closest we've gotten to a main character is like Carl Laredo from Wendy's. Yes. 100%. The guy who loves Country Fries more than his family.

Yeah. Carl Laredo. We don't mean that, Carl. I don't know if you're a listener. Well, we don't know it. It's what Justin means. We have our suspicions. I come with you today.

I come to you today. My heart, my hand is to say that I have another story about Young Gravy. Oh, okay. I mean, when your name is Young Gravy. So there's a lot of merchandising opportunities there for you. Young Gravy, you remember, I think in KFC Canada was tasking us with honoring our gravings. And that was a big, a big campaign that they did feature Young Gravy. And now today, sort of alongside that one.

Milf. Milf. Sh. Sh. Milf. Now stands for moms I'd like to feed. Oh boy. Thanks to Young Gravy and Jimmy John's Red Velvet Cookies.

Oh, no. Yes. Yes. Jimmy John's. It's true Travis is tempting chocolate lovers this Valentine's Day with the release of a sweet new dessert, the Red Velvet Cookie available for a limited time. Hey, Justin, but Justin, and I know we'll get to it. Why bring Milf into this?

What a question, Trav. To honor the release of this sensational new treat, Jimmy John's partnered with, and I hope this is someday on my business card, multi platinum rapper, TikTok superstar and notorious fan of older women, Young Gravy. Oh boy. To redefine. I've forgotten the business that this, this is not even, so far this doesn't sound like it has anything to do with a business.

This is just somebody wanted to pilot a show about Young Gravy, romancing older women. They're there to change for cookies? They're there to redefine the term Milf. Well, yeah. To me. Because they're leaving out like the M, which is mom, can't just say older woman. That's a cougar. You're talking about a Milf, which is, could be a younger mom, is any mom that has a child

that you find yourself attracted to. Why are you talking so much about Young Gravy right now? I'm just trying to talk about honoring. No, I'm mad at Jimmy John's. I don't. Yeah. Well, there's a lot of reasons to be mad at Jimmy John's. We're not going to deal with any of those.

What we are going to say is this quote from Young Gravy who said, I've been counting down the days until the release of the red velvet cookie. Oh Lord. In a hilarious, and that is the entirety of his quote. Yes. He's up. Okay. Young Gravy just released a new video and on the event, the hilarious over the top dramatic

reality show style video. Young Gravy is tasked with awarding a red velvet cookie to his favorite milk. And it says here, the winner may surprise you. Oh, so that's sort of a sneak preview. I watched this video and it doesn't, doesn't say which milk gets the red velvet cookie. How surprising. Yeah, it's really, it's really kind of surprising. So they don't say it.

And it's not the video. So I am, was surprised that they didn't include that. Wait, you were so entranced by the game mechanics of Milfen Cookies that you were upset. Milfen Cookies is the name of it? No. Wouldn't that be so? Yes, it's called Milfen Cookies. Milfen Cookies is the name of this one.

And maybe that's the, I mean, there has to be some reason for this. Maybe that's as good as we're going to get. Darren Dugan, the CMO at Jimmy John says, we have the opportunity to increase our menu offerings through innovative menu items that we know will delight our guests. Partnering with a true brand fan like Young Gravy to bring this delicious red velvet. He is. I don't know anything about this gentleman except for the fact that he fucking does love brands though.

Like he is, he is handling his career in very much the same way that we would give it a similar trajectory, I think. I'm also, I'm just going to throw it out there at this point. I could not name a Young Gravy creation, but I can name two brand related campaigns he's been in. As far as I know, he's famous for loving partnering with brands. What about oops? Supercalifragilisticepialidocious.

That was big on TikTok for a while if I remember correctly. Anyway, listen. Hey, partnering with a true brand fan like Young Gravy to bring this delicious red velvet cooked with the masses in time for Valentine's Day. And that is how they see you. Make no mistake, friends. The masses. The masses.

It just felt like the right thing to do. So. Oh, morally. Yeah. Don't forget the buck. We have a great moral compass here at Jimmy John's. The owner of Jimmy John's. He sucks.

Anyway, that's the, that's the end of this story. But I'm going to real quick. I got to take you over to KFC Canada, where we are partnering with Raptor star Gary Trent Jr. to launch a buckets our life that a campaign campaign that taps into Canada's love of basketball. No. Did they, did they have they already retired Young Gravies? Yeah.

We've moved on from honoring our gravies. Now we're hit. Well, they heard that he was in bed with Jimmy John's. And they're like out for decades. Canadians have gathered around KFC's iconic bucket to share a meal. Now KFC is rallying Canadians around the world. They're shared passion for buckets through basketball in a definitively Canadian way with the KF court.

If you can imagine this. KFC. No, I don't understand any of the concepts you just said. It's the world's first winterized basketball court. Huh. That can't be possible. That's not true. Winter is usually considered off season for outdoor courts, but KFC believes that nothing

should stand in the way of Canadians and their love of buckets. Wow. Hey, this is a nice one here. This has been my family for three generations. How choice bucket. Okay. So they made one basketball court in Canada. They doesn't freeze.

Here's what it actually says. KFC created the KFC court. The KFC court. A winter friendly basketball court located under one of Canada's busiest highways. The governor expressed way at the bit way. That's what it says. It says that this is a basketball court. They built under a very busy highway.

But to attract Canadians from around the world. Okay. Hold on. We have, if that is the logic for what it means to winterize a basketball court. Mankind discovered how to winterize a basketball court when it discovered how to winterize any object. We just build a building around it. Right now it snows.

Now what if, hear me, we came up with some kind of, I'm going to call them barriers, and they go around it and on top of it. An up wall? An up wall. What are you fucking talking about? You can't have up walls. Oh, can't I? Just watch.

I just can't. Ow, it's not working. Ow, it fell out. Yeah, of course it fell. It's an up wall. Dip shit. On my legs. Lift up the down wall.

Wait for a second. Everybody listen to this podcast right now. Look up at your ceiling. What's keeping it up there? Because if you can't answer that question, you need to be outside with the best of us. Up there was us all believing it should be up there. Be careful. I don't know.

You play a dangerous game. Sometimes, yeah. So good boss, where you want to build the court? Under the busiest fucking highway you can find, man. Just find one that cars are cranking over all day long, but it's not just going to be that. We need some new big commercial idea to boost our chicken selling business. Who's got one? We could build a basketball court under a super busy highway.

I love it. You're promoted. Can we get young gravy? What? He's busy? Fuck. Damn it. Reimagining KFC's iconic chicken bucket as a playable NBA regulation size bucket.

What? And then it says here RSB. Okay. Canadians can come for a game of pickup or pick up some fresh skills from local hoopers. Get out. Hey listen, if you want me to teach you the ropes of the court. There's only one place that I like to hoop. It's under a really busy highway.

At the court conducting fried chicken. I love the idea of I'm out eating a bucket of fried chicken. I picked it with my family and someone comes in just fucking slams a basketball down into it. Like, oh, I'm so sorry. I've been doing this visualization of that it's a basketball hoop. I'm so sorry. I think you guys might be having trouble imagining it.

Yeah, no, please. Yeah. I'm slacking you a link. Again, we're not doing video, but I wanted you to have an image you could refer to. It's really, if you can imagine a basketball court underneath the highway. Oh, and a completely dismantlable. Let's talk about this is not a permanent basketball court they've established here. This is a basketball court that looks like it would take about 10 minutes to break down

into pieces. Charles, did you think the KFC was like in 15 years to be like, well, on one part of the budget that's really tough for us is maintaining our basketball court underneath the highway? No, Justin, but I didn't think they'd make a press release about this flimsy looking piece of shit. Like, cool, man. They'll make a press release about Pepsi flavored like peeps that they're making eight cans of.

Now, Canadians love finger licking good buckets is only matched by their love of buckets on the basketball court says a seam actor through what I'm assuming was a great deal of strain. The director of marketing for KFC Canada. That's why we wanted to bring these two worlds together like only KFC can and create an epic winterized court that feeds Canadians growing passion for basketball. And you know what? Ask any local Hooper and they'll tell you nothing makes you better at basketball than greasy hands.

True. You turned about the cold. Don't be chicken. The custom court has. Hey, come on, coward. What? What? You afraid you're going to freeze your butt off?

Come on. Come on. Little cold never killed nobody. The custom court has everything you need to ball your fucking brains out. It's got pre-warmed basketballs upon arrival. What? Excuse me. Pre-warmed.

Pass me the rock. Ow. Fuck. Pre-warmed basketballs upon arrival. I would say pre-warming them after my arrival would be a hell of a thing. All right. You want a plate? Give me 10 minutes.

They got rotating DJs on select Friday and Saturday's courtesy. Pre-warm the DJs. Pre-warm rotating rotisserie DJs. I know I would be so put out if it was the same DJ every weekend at the KFC basketball court under a highway. Let's also just take a moment to think about the DJ who shows up for his shift, I guess. Yeah. And he's like, there's no one here.

Eight hours. Just wait. Be ready. Okay. Keep playing no matter what. There's a Pepsi sponsored warming center with heaters and refreshments in case you're thinking they weren't going to get their nuts into this one. They have to bust.

Is he something like this? They got to get it on. They have to start it. All the young brands, family, all collaborating. You love to see it. Hey, Justin. Can you describe the basketballs themselves? They're buckets of fried chicken.

I said that. It's their bucket. They're standard regulation sized buckets. They're RBSs, but they're buckets like KFC. How far down the line do you think that this promotional brainstorming went before an employee of the young brand said, don't they mostly call them baskets? Like, I know people have said buckets, but primarily they say baskets, right? Canada.

It's different. You don't know. It's like how they say loonies and hoopers. Yep. You know. There's also KFC samples on select days, which I would love to know the math on that. Will we feed the trolls under the bridge today? No, I think not.

Have they scored enough hooper points? How many hooper points have they collected? Twenty? Not enough? Beware, they count the hooper points two or three at a time. To keep you crispy as a hot bucket of delicious fried chicken. Oh, God, no. Yes.

Yeah, that's horrifying. Guests can also gear up in custom limited edition number 11 puffer jerseys honoring the favorite herbs and spices. To keep? Yeah. You can you can gear up and probably bought by gear up. They probably mean purchase for a great deal of money, I would imagine. KFC is donating court time to local basketball community groups to run their programs and

offering a five dollar bookable time slot with funds going to jump through hoops. And it's got the address here, but I feel like it's under a highway. You know, you just kind of. Highway don't got no address. Hard to miss. Yeah. I would say. Mile marker 14.

I would say that the ground underneath this basketball court that I'm looking at does look extra crispy. So I enjoy that immensely. It looks like they have fried the ground. Thank you. I think it's just dirt. And that's this. That's just dirt.

My friend. My friend. That's how Canadian dirt looks beautiful, pristine, well manicured. Delicious. Now, all the chemicals. Like our dirt. How about another question? I would love that.

I'm a concept artist working in video games and I'm designing my first villain character. The character is a nasty tech mogul who's supposed to appear charming, but he has nefarious attentions. I made it most of the way through the design of my team's really happy with it. The problem is the more I work on it, the more it looks like my dad. My dad is a lovely pool barrier inspector and has no evil corporation aspirations. Should I redesign my nasty man? And that's from concerned in Carnegie.

Are you sure he doesn't have nefarious business intentions? You don't know? You don't know. He could be trying to establish a pool barrier inspection monopoly. Read under your nose. Have you asked him? I will admit to being a little excited for the first half of this question because I thought they were going to ask for like badass villain design.

If there was like green spikes filled with poison coming out. Oh, you could give him kind of like puffy white hair and like a white beard and then like kind of round-ish glasses and like a little bit of like an Ohio West Virginia accent. And he wears like a Marshall University ring. Yeah. And sometimes he wears like a puffy vest over like a button-up shirt. What if he looks like me? Yeah.

He looks like old Justin or also old me or strangely not old Griffin. No. No. Like imagine me and Justin, but just used up. Or like a snake tongue. Yeah. You could have both of those things. Yeah.

You could have both of those things. What if he was wearing a turbo vest? He had orange goo bumping into it and you see that and you're like, I don't know what that's doing, but it's probably making him strong. Do you think you accidentally draw your dad because you've drawn your dad too many times or not enough times? Oh, you got a lot of end up dad drawings in there. Oh, it's like, you don't realize you're drawing your dad until it's too late.

If you drew your dad a lot, right? The warning signs would be there like, oh, this is going to be my dad, I think. I've done that. I've started to do that with my own humor in my daily life. Yeah. I think that maybe you should evaluate your art for traces of your dad. When you were doing your life drawing practices, was it always your dad? Did your dad always model for you?

Because then you might have just learned like, whoa, basic human face looks like, you know, kind of dad shaped. All right, now body is kind of dad shaped. Kind of dad. All your butts look like your dad's butts. Yeah, thank you. Or maybe it's just the books you grew up on that taught you to read was like how to draw anime characters that look like your dad.

Yeah. How to draw sports cars that look like your dad. I would also say even if your dad is the purest of heart, that doesn't mean that he hasn't styled himself in a villainous way. Your dad might enjoy like a super pointy goatee and maybe some like over embellished eyebrows and maybe he does wear like spiky leather clothes and stuff. He could be a very sweet pool barrier instructor, inspector. Yes.

Hold that fucking water. Don't you dare drip. Don't give up on me now, barrier. I was thinking of what a villainous pool barrier inspector could even possibly do. I think the most obvious answer is they find a hole leaking water in the pool barrier and just don't say anything about it. Which is worse, that or they make their own hole? Oh, definitely the latter one with their big spikes filled with like the orange turbo

that makes them strong. If a pool barrier inspector rolled up to my house wearing cleats that pumped out orange mysterious goo, I would be like, this guy seems like to know good. Yeah. And then you're like, what does that goo do for him? Why is it coming? Is it supposed to be coming out? Is it from him?

Is this a religious system? Is he using it or is he producing it? Is it both? Is it both? Also, why is he looking at me? Oh, he can hear me. Why am I saying this out loud? Doesn't this also kind of depend on what the game is?

Yeah. It's like a Ninja Turtles thing. Your dad's going to stick out like a sore thumb. I don't know your dad, but like I imagine. Once again, you're making assumptions that he doesn't look, he doesn't have like a big metal sharp hat on and he's not wearing a big old cape with like big metal spikes on his hands. But hey, the pool barrier looks fine.

If your dad looks too much like Shredder, then they can't. Oh, is that who I was describing? Yeah. If your dad is like, looks exactly like Shredder, they're going to get mad at you. Like you have to be more creative. We already have somebody who looks exactly like this. Shredder is taken, man. Listen, do you want a picture of my dad or not?

What? What a fucking life to have to go through it looking like Shredder. Chilling on a boat every day. Week in, week out. When the turtles were like huge, then fucking people would just see on the street like Shredder. Shut the door in your face like, I think I'll inspect my pool barrier myself. Thanks. I'll catch the next elevator.

I'm not writing in one with Shredder. Imagine if your dad was also super into cosplay, but not as Shredder. But it was like, then you would roll it to and they'd be like, I don't get it. Deadpool Shredder, Shredpool. And I'd be like, no, it's just Deadpool. Just normal Deadpool. I just happened to look like Shredder. Yes.

Okay. Yes. It's Freddy Shredder. It's a combination of the two. Thank you. Thank you so much for listening to our podcast. We hope you've enjoyed yourself. We got, okay, we're really close to the 11th hour graphic novel coming out so close.

In fact, that I have my own copy of it. It's coming out February 21st. And when I looked at it, I wept because it's such a beautiful book. And yes. That's so funny because when I looked at it, I wept because I had nothing left to conquer. What? Except for the ones after it. Except for what?

Some more books. This comes out February 21st. And we got a live virtual event that day at 8 p.m. Eastern to celebrate the release. We got live readings, special guests and more plus event exclusive sign copies available from Brookline Booksmith and left bank books. So go to bit.ly for its last Taz GN live 2023 for more info and to purchase the event exclusive signed book.

Also, we got some brand new merch because it's a new month. We got a 20 son and C sticker designed by Lucas Hespinhide, who is at mostly based on Instagram. We've got that space baby sticker designed by Cedric Wolf. We've got some steeple chase postcards for used to been gutter city and passions Cove, which are so glorious designed by Kate May and the 2022 candle nights video on demand. You can pay what you want. All proceeds go to Harmony House.

10% of all merch proceeds this month will go to the Foundation for Black Women's Wellness, which works to energize, mobilize and support black women to transform their health and their lives through education, advocacy, support and powerful partnerships. All of that at macroemerge.com. Go check it out. I also want to say mentioning steeple chase postcards. You should go listen to steeple chase if you're not already. We just finished a heist and it's a really fun time.

And also thanks to Montaigne. For the use of our theme song, my life is better with you. It's probably the world's best song and it's really good that we get to use it as often as we do. Agreed. Thank you for listening. We don't say it enough. Thank you.

That's going to do it for us. Bye. So, bye. Bye. See you next week. I'm going to start sweeping up. My name is Justin McElroy. I'm Travis McElroy.

I'm Griffin McElroy. This has been my brother, my brother, me, kiss your dad, square on the lip. Chilling. I feel a chill. Chill, chill. We have to fix this. This can't go on. It's better with you.

This is true. It's better. It's better with you. My life. It's better with you. It's better with you. It's better with you. It's better with you.

It's better with you. It's better with you. It's better with you. It's better with you. It's better with you. It's better with you. It's better with you. It's better with you.

It's better with you. It's better with you. It's better with you. It's better with you. It's better with you. It's better with you. It's better with you. It's better with you.

It's better with you. It's better with you. It's better with you.