My Brother, My Brother And Me - MBMBaM 653: Mardi Gras Hades

Episode Date: March 27, 2023

We’re showing off our serious character-voice chops in this episode: Clipping Yoda, the mashmallow-hungry puppet we all know and love; a creepy spirit; gum spokespeople; and a young candymaker. We promise Clipping Yoda is a sometimes-food. Suggested talking points: My Heart is Jokes, Subsession, Cool Dude Illuminati, Baby Boppy, Light a Cat Ball, Want that Sky Ale, Quarter FlounderEquality Florida: https://www.eqfl.org/

The McElroy brothers are not experts, and their advice should never be followed. Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it. Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mention only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby? To a precious friendship, I could have never seen what was coming for me. Hangs at the skate park, hangs by the beach. My life, it feels life. My life, it's better, it's better with you.

My life, it's better, it's better with you. My life, it's better with you. My life, it's better with you. And I've just been leaving it all out on the court. Yeah, I noticed that Griffin. I'm 11%. I'm gassed, gang. My hardest jokes, my most jokes.

Social media, off the charts. We got four days left, Griffin. You gotta hold stuff back, man. You gotta hold it together. We have a whole other week, work week. Dude, I can't. I don't have it in me. Griffin, let me inspire you.

I heard again from Dr. Professor Guhart. He said he was going to take all your favorite vinyls and cut them up into decorative clocks. Vinyls? Yeah, all your favorite vinyls. That's what he said. When you say that, do you mean records or do you mean like vinyls? Funko pops. I would say records.

Dr. Professor Guhart said vinyls. Travis, I have... Can we pause? I have two children. You have two children, Justin has two children. So I know you know what it's like. The thought that I have time in my day to say, I want to listen to music.

Let me go over to my special music machine in the corner and go through the heavy music. The slow music where you can't find it so good and put on some of that, maybe have a snifter of Brandy while I finish this. I don't think you listen to them, but I know you own them. That's good, actually, that's right. The only music I am allowed to listen to is Megan Trainers I Made You Look.

Oh, interesting. That's the only song I'm allowed to listen to. I am only allowed to listen to the song We Know the Way from Moana, a movie that came out a million years ago that my three-year-old is now like, now wait, hold on, let me... Is this some dusty old broken down movie? Your daughter's still watching. I'm like, what about in Kansas? That's that new stuff.

And she's like, no, no, no. And she only knows that... But how about Midnights, Bibi? Come on. Get on the new stuff. It's not Bibi. No, it's not Bibi. It's Dot, who... Wow, what a twist. ...requests a way away, which is not the name of the song,

constantly, constantly. Drag her for filth, Travis. It's in my head all the time, though. And you know what's in my head? The Max Fun Drive, which we are the second and final week of. It's the special time of year where we come to you with three hats. We're wearing three sets of little suspenders. Now, follow them. The lady's under one of them.

Find the lady. Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Find where's the lady? She's under the hat. It's a full-grown lady underneath my hat. Yeah, it's a huge, it's a huge Jamiroquai-style hat. And we are asking you to fill it to the brim with support for us and the other shows on the Max Fun Fun Network. It's a great, great community and a great family of shows

that we've been happy to be a part of for over a decade. And it's genuinely made our lives what they are, and we're so, so, so grateful for it. And that is only true because of the sport we've gotten over the last 11 years or whatever. Can I tell you some exciting things? So it's 13 years, and we... Good lord.

First off, and second of all, just like over the past couple years, we've been able to ring Tom in to do video stuff. We've been able to bring Rachel in to edit. We've been able to bring Shannon in to help with basically everything related to... Like, if you see anything on social media, that's not us. That's Shannon and Sarah. And we wouldn't be able to do that without you guys.

And also, this... Like in the last five days, we've done more streaming stuff than we normally do in two months' time. And it's very exciting to me. We figured out where the record button was on our computers because of the support we've gotten from the Maxfun drive. We were yelling at our dad while playing Stardew Valley anyway.

Yes. Imagine our thrill to find out that is of interest. Concentrate that. And you can support all of our shows. You can support Maxfun. You can support the people that we work with. You can support us by going to maximalfun.org slash join.

Find a support level that works for you. It starts as well as $5 a month. And know that you are, one, going to get over 500 hours of bonus content, which is fully worth it. And two, you're supporting our show. And we appreciate that immensely. Thank you so much for considering it. We'll talk more about it later.

If I can fucking muster up the juice. I went in to get... This isn't... I'm just pre-fanning it, though. I went in to get my haircut, a razor and shear from Manjoey. Oh, wait. Settle in. Oh, let me see you.

Shout out to Joey. Real quick. It's right. Oh, it's good. I asked Joey, like, go short. I need a shortcut for the year. And he was, like, very respectfully going short. Respectfully.

That's so good. Because sometimes the stylist gets in there and they're so rude about going short. Yeah, I hate that. Broke. Why is it so wet? When I first got home, I started messing with it. I was like, I don't really...

I think I did too much. I think I took off too much. I don't like it. And then I started messing with it a bit more. And I was like, I'll put some product in there. And then I was like, you know what? This is kind of the thought that I had. And this is where we're at the crux of the issue.

The thought that I had was, it's kind of like Chris Humsworth was doing in Thor Love and Thunder. Oh, I love that. Thor Love and Thunder. I love that. We love that. But then I started thinking about it. I was like, I should lean into this.

Maybe this is a new look. And then I thought, I don't think I can say to Joey, to anybody, I'm going for kind of a Thor thing in any part of my body. I don't feel like I could be like, I'm going for sort of a Thor. Right. Justin, I got you. I got you. You ready for this?

Next time you go, you're going to lead Joey to water. And he's going to drink. You're going to say, you know that movie? Oh, what was it? It had the big guy in it. And I think he fought the Hulk at one point. So Joey says Thor. And he says Thor.

And you're like, oh, yeah. I thought about it. Joey, I guess I do have kind of a Thor vibe. You've got to be super, super specific because you could lead him to the wrong water in this setup. And he could be like, oh, Groot. And then you can't say no, Thor. I would take it.

Frankly. At that point you say, yes, give me Groot. Make me Groot. I am Groot. I am Groot. Now I've got that big Groot. I'm just going to have to call on my team of special effects experts to get you to body cast.

I've got a very anime, if I may. It's going, it's higher than the frame. I really wish we weren't talking about our fucking haircuts right now. I'm sorry, Griffin, that yours doesn't do shit. But I'm going super saiyan over here. Travis is going Mardi Gras Hades. You're not going to say anything funnier than what I just said. No.

That's the end of the segment. I got to pat it back down now because now the bit is done. This is an advice show. We help people and now we're going to do exactly that. And there's not a thing you or anybody else can do about it because this has already happened. I accidentally put our card to the email. Well, yeah, I'm the only one who can stop me. That would be a good shirt.

I'm the only one that can stop me. Okay. Last year, I went to a craft festival with a friend. Nice. Nice. That sounds like a good afternoon. Hell yeah, it is. Hell yeah.

Oh, you see presents for friends. What a fucking score. If you can go to a friend and go, I got this to you and they're like, oh, at a store and you're like, no, no, at a craft festival. I went to with a different friend. One of the booths sold cheap silver rings and allowed customers to print custom messages on the outside of the ring. As a joke, I brought my husband a ring that read 69, 420, 69.

I think it's very important to know that there were hyphens in between that. So it looks like either a date or a locker combination. I think that that is different than just 69, 420, 69. No, no, no. Yeah. Those are coordinates that could take you somewhere, I bet. Oh yeah. Well, I brought it to him.

It also applies. Let's try 69. This isn't working. Hey, you know what? We'll try again. Let's 420. When I brought it to him, he this can't be real. When I brought it to him, he took off his wedding ring and put on the joke ring.

Brothers, it's been almost a year and he hasn't taken the ring off since. He has gained a bit of weight since our wedding and he says the joke ring is more comfortable than his real ring. He also claims if he twists the ring around, no one can see what it says, but I constantly see those embarrassing numbers upright staring at me. How do I get it to stop wearing a 69 ring as a symbol of our eternal love? I can't. I can't.

I don't have the energy for this one, guys. Yeah. Griffin left it all on the court. Holy shit. I put the question list together and it wasn't until Justin was reading out loud that it occurred to me to ask this question if you question asked her. Did you make it clear it was a joke when you gave it to him? It doesn't.

Because it's possible that you handed in the ring and he was like, oh, I love it. Right? And he's like, oh, thank you, honey. I really appreciate this and he has no idea. This is one of those rare and amazing questions for us. Sometimes we get a question and it's like, ah, man, I mean, nobody's technically wrong in this situation, but maybe you could be going about it in a different way. It's rare to get a question where just everyone in it is the villain.

Yeah. And you can be like, why are you wearing that ring? Why didn't you think that that was going to be the outcome of the situation? That's where I'm at. If I was given a ring by my wife that says 69, 420, 69 on it, I don't know that I'd wear it in lieu of my wedding ring, but I would never take it off ever. Yeah. I would be buried in that.

No, I would give it like a great heirloom. Yeah. You wouldn't be buried in it because then it wouldn't die with you. No, no, no, no. I'd be dug up for this great treasure that I had. Oh yeah. Grave robbing would be a real issue there, Rachel. Huge issue for me.

You didn't even think about that. Did you, Rachel? Huge issue for me. Come on. Come on. I'm 100% with you, Griffin. Frankly, here's where I'm at. You gave your husband a, let's reframe the question and remove some of the variables.

You gave your husband a present and he loves it. Whoa, what a great, that's wonderful. Oh, a thing you can wear and he wears it every day. That's beautiful. Oh, what's that you say? There were some numbers on it. Was it your anniversary perhaps or his birth? Oh, I see.

This is the greatest question of all time. You have given your husband the greatest gift I could ever imagine because if I was talking to someone that I didn't know and getting to know them and I looked at their wedding and I was like, oh, that's cool. You're married. And then they turned their ring around to reveal that it's a secret. Like something from like The Phantom or The Shadow or something. Like something from National Treasure Book of Secrets 69, 420, 69 on it.

I would do everything in my power to become that person's best friend. That is an enormous amount of social security. I'm in the cool dude Illuminati. That's what you can see here. Next level. You did a great thing without thinking about, you did an incredible, perfect, beautiful thing without thinking about the consequences, which are grave. And the husband is really, that's a big move to stick with that position and not just say,

yeah, I'll put the ring on that you gave me at the, I remember the wedding. That was a significant one, huh? I'll wear the ring then. The real one. Because Griffin, I'll take a step forward. You see your new friend is wearing this ring. You're like, is that your wedding ring? And you say, well, it wasn't at first, but then my wife got it.

And now it also is the right kind of annoying to my partner. Right? Where like, there are things I do, there are jokes that I make where every like fifth time Teresa laughs because it's like, I can't believe you keep making that joke. Right? I think that's intrinsic to any long term relationship. Right. And you gave your husband a physical version of that.

He's never taking that off. It's so good. You're going to have to cut it off of him while he sleeps. You're going to have to hire Danny Ocean to remove that ring. You're, you can get a ring cutter on Amazon for like $14.99. No problem. I've seen TikToks where you wrap a string around it and then you wrap it around his finger and you pull it off.

He might notice that while he's sleeping though. Hey, here's another option. I've seen ring cutters on Amazon for like $14.99. But what does that mean, Justin? What's a ring cutter? It's like a thing you twist underneath and then you crank it and it cuts. Usually like Sidney needed them for like medical purposes because you sometimes need to get jewelry off really fast.

Yeah. Yeah. It's exciting. It's not exciting. It's thrilling. Thrilling to cut. You guys want another question? Yeah.

We could. We could also approach the Wizards Throne humbly. Oh, let's do that. I love that. That's awesome. I rarely do anything humbly and it's nice to have that, like to change that up. That's wonderful. I'm coming here.

I think with a hat trick. Thank you, Siobhan. Just really, really found a deep and rich vein here. Sorry. Is it Siobhan with a V sound or a B? Like bubba bub or bubba bub? Is that Michael Chaban? It's S-I-O-B-H-A-N.

I believe that Irish people pronounce Siobhan. Ooh. Nice. So. Sounds like that name. Oh, yes. Shiv? Yeah.

Well, sure. You got that for sure. A lot of great Siobhan's out there. Sub-Session. Sub-Session. It's a show where Brian Cox's kids are all trying to get his beautiful submarine. Yeah. And he's had it for years.

And they all want it. Oh, I love it. And it's very obvious. Because they're all in it. Yeah. Okay. They're all stuck in the sun. In the submarine?

Yeah. They live and work and breathe in the submarine on Sub-Session. But it's like, there's somebody's in the brig and somebody's in the driving part. They're all usually in the- They're all usually in the missile. It maybe has missiles or doesn't. Yeah. Yeah, they haven't figured out.

That's a season four reveal. Yeah. Is that they have missiles. They usually, all their conversations do take place in the exact same room. And so, like, there's not as much room for sort of like- Yeah, this isn't a SeaQuest DSV Si Sub. It's important to know this is your standard. It's like private sub-sci.

There is a talking dolphin. Mike Yoda. What? Sorry? Go on, you will? How to speak like Yoda. Justin, you're exempt from this one. You just tested out, my friend.

Travis always does good at him. I want to try to do like, I want to try to have like a killer Yoda. Hey, Justin, I really appreciate that sleeping generalization, but I'm just going to come in here and say, I don't always do good at them. Travis does good at every impression. Travis, you have a skill. You have a latent skill for impression.

I mean, is that the word for it? Yes, but I can't do it on purpose. I'm like a superhero that can only do it when he's not thinking about it. Like the one who turns invisible in Mystery Men. I can't do it if you're looking at me. Was that kill Mitchell? Um, yes? Yeah.

Mastering? Speaking of, because we won't have another opportunity, Good Burger 2 did get commissioned. Dad texted us. I did appreciate that one. Yeah, I like that one. A rare Mac W in the text thread with the pop culture news updates. Dad brought me to the group chat with this one.

Oh boy, this was a spicy meatball. Hey, you're both welcome on the show. If I had to bet on which one would actually come through, I think I'm pretty sure about which one it would be, but I would love to get you to choose. I can't choose. Yeah, I can't choose. I can't choose.

Understand Yoda's sentence structures. It is theorized that Yoda's grammar is very similar to how ancient humans spoke in 50,000 BC. Yoda tends to struck. Yeah, I don't know. You heard him. A bunch of grammar stuff. I didn't know you could just say things.

I didn't know that that was. Yeah, that's probably how they did it. So, for example, I play soccer becomes soccer I play when Yoda says it. Does Yoda play soccer as the ball? Am I right? Look at that little nerd. I could kick him around so easy. Hey, it's rubbish.

Maybe you didn't see the prequels, man, because Yoda-man. Yoda-man. Yoda-man. You've seen him. You know it. But Yoda-man. Yoda-man. Hey, do you remember when Star Wars was in theaters?

Yeah. And they made a new one. And they weren't. They weren't good. They found one scene. They found one kick-ass scene and one of them. And then the commercial guys were like, we got to do something. And so they just put that in there with the words Yoda-man in the commercial.

Yeah. That was a big one. That was a big swing from George. If we could get the behind the scenes of that one, George, by the way, I'd pay so much money to watch this really do that fight with a tennis ball on a string or a stick or whatever. I would love that shit so much, please. Please.

Please understand Yoda's sentence structures. I will stay and help you stay and help you. I will. Right, right, right. OK. Practice rephrasing common sentences to fit Yoda's style. Choose some simple sentences that you use daily and restructure them to conform to Yoda's ancient grammatical tendencies.

You literally just took the sort of first sentence in each segment and then just made it a lot. You heated it in a longer form. Yeah. So you would say like, mocha latte, I will have oat milk, it must be. So shit, I do not. This is, yeah, here's, it's not a grammatical structure if he just does every sentence backwards, right?

There has to be some points where he just says the sentence without being kind of an asshole about it. Yeah. One of the examples they have in this section is, have a good night becomes a good night have. Which is not it. That ain't it. I'm pretty sure Yoda wouldn't be an asshole about that.

Yeah. He would just say, have a good one, man. Yeah. No, wait, maybe he wouldn't. Because that felt weird. Are you hungry for sandwiches? He wouldn't be like, hungry for sandwiches? Are you?

Because that's what he would say. No, he wouldn't. Travis actually, God. First of all, yes, that is how he would say that sentence. And second of all, you sounded so damn much like Yoda just now. It makes you furious, Travis. But you can't say hungry for sandwiches, are you? Because it's unclear there if that's a question or a statement.

No, because he inflects at the time. You don't listen. Hungry for sandwiches, you are. Okay, you're right. That's the statement. That's hungry for sandwiches. Study some of Yoda's most famous lines. Oh, wait.

Hang on. We have a brief presentation. Okay. A brief presentation. Oh, fuck yeah. I know what this is going to be. I'm about to get fucking totally cranked. You're the man.

Oh, fuck. Oh, please. Load, load, load. Load, load, please. On November 12th, Huda Man, Yoda Man. Oh, boy. When you take home Star Wars Episode 2 on DVD, digitally filmed, digitally mastered, a perfect code.

Own the first major live-action film on DVD, captured directly from its digital source. What? The student is satisfied with over six hours of bonus features you'll actually want to watch. Star Wars Episode 2. Yoda Man on DVD November 12th. Okay.

It's better. It's better than I even remember. It's better than that. They didn't have the strength. They did not have the strength of their convictions to leave it at Yoda Man. If I heard them regularly, they said, Yoda Man.

They came up with a catchphrase, and then they were like, guys, does Yoda Man sound stupid? And it sounds like just to cover our bases. Let's do it both ways. Let's do it both ways in the same commercial. Yoda Man. That feels so much worse to say Yoda Man.

There is a shot, folks, if you're watching the audio version of this podcast, which you can't be watching either. It's confusing. You're losing your pie. There's a shot at the end where Yoda reaches out and uses the force to draw in a not-to-scale DVD of the second, what is the second one?

Attack of the Clones. Attack of the Clones. Is the fact that it was both digitally shot and digitally mastered a selling point in the year 2023? I don't even know exactly what it means. You know that this ad is not from the year 2023. Yes, but I'm saying now I'm sitting here in 2023 trying to figure out what that means exactly.

My love, this is a 20-year-old commercial. They had to have something studied. I do love the little flex of like, we've got behind-the-scenes content. You'll actually want to watch. You didn't want to watch the movie. No way. But maybe you want to watch these six hours of bonus content.

Please? Please? Yoda man? Yoda man? Watch this movie, you will? Yoda. What if it had been like a statement to Yoda at the end? Yoda man.

Yoda. Yoda does have a man. Practice the sound of his voice. Fucking yeah. Keep your grades down. Practice the sound of your voice. Yoda has a slightly croaky throaty voice that occasionally cracks and breaks.

You're forming your voice in the back of your throat to give it that throaty, gargoyle sound. Do you think he always sounded that way? Yoda. Are you wanting to eat marshmallows? I do. Maybe? Maybe his voice sounded awful.

Travis, don't walk on Justin's incredible impression. Sorry, Justin. One more time. Let him take a swing at it. Okay. Marshmallows I will eat. Oh boy. Is that good?

Do it backwards though. Don't say marshmallows I will eat. Say it backwards. Marshmallows eat, I will. Eat marshmallows, will I? No, that was actually too close to the correct order. Marshmallows. Statement.

Statement. Marshmallows. I will consume. I will consume marshmallows. No, I don't. No, that was actually the right order, I think. That's like he woke you up in the middle of the night and grabbed you by your overpills.

I will eat marshmallows. Okay. Whoa, Yoda. Get it, man. I can't think of a worse spoken sentence on this show. Clipping Yoda is my favorite character. And our editor Rachel's least favorite, Clipping Yoda. Who ate marshmallows?

Sorry, man. I didn't know that you would do them. Clipping Yoda. Clipping Yoda, get out of here. I didn't know that you would claim the marshmallows. This is the marshmallows. Go eat marshmallows I was. Clipping Yoda.

Clipping Yoda, you're done. Clipping Yoda, it is the max. The max of marshmallows I had. Clipping Yoda. I can't work. Look forward to marshmallows I did. Yoda, I'm so sorry. I didn't know.

It's our pledge drive Clipping Yoda, please. It's the one time in a year. He had a better microphone. It wouldn't clip when Clipping Yoda came to town. Okay, listen. It raised my whole volume. I have to turn my mic down because I was getting so excited. Clipping Yoda.

Man, that's a really powerful, funny gun though, Trav. You can bust that out literally anywhere. I'm going to say it though. I can't do it too much or I might lose my voice. And our listenership. And our listenership. Hey, this was the first Max Fun Driver. Can we make a promise?

Can we make a promise right now? Because there's probably a good segment of our listenership that is listening in fear. That Clipping Yoda will be a sometimes food. Yes. And not a set. And all of our great bits. No.

No, Clipping Yoda must be a sometimes food. That's the promise we make you, this Max Fun Drive. I talked a lot the last one. So one of you guys do it. Oh yeah, this is the Max Fun Drive. Our shows on this podcast network are owned by the people that make them. And they are supported by this network, Maximum Fun. They help us to sell ads, to schedule shows,

to make sure everything's working all together, to help us find guests. They also work with you. They work with you to make sure that you're getting the episodes correctly, that the rewards that you get from the Max Fun Driver are making their way to you. They're answering questions. They're helping with billing. All of that stuff.

So a portion of it. Travis you over compensated for Clipping Yoda just a little bit. You're a little quiet. Can I go too quiet now? Sorry, this is smooth Travis. So you are helping to support them, but you're mainly supporting the shows that you enjoy on the network. You just choose the ones that you are into when you sign up or when you boost

or when you upgrade your donation. And if you do start a new donation or upgrade, we've got some like beautiful, beautiful gifts for you. Oh yeah. Obviously a $5 a month, which is kind of our entry level. There's a lot, a lot, a lot of bonus content. We got some great stuff this year. We re-recorded our Margaritaville Blue Carpet episode with Matt Doyle.

And we switched parts and it's really like, it's really out there y'all. Even for us, it's pretty out there. If you can do $10 a month, you get all that stuff, plus one of 37 reusable stickers and a Maxfun membership card. The stickers are really cool. Each one is like themed to the show. I got a bunch of them in the mail yesterday. I did too.

They are gorgeous. Yeah. Olivia Fields, the artist on those really, really. Thank you Monster God for my rock and bond, which I believe is my brother, my brother and me sticker, is better than the show we make. So don't actually remember saying it, but I'm sure we did at some point. Yeah.

And there's lots of other gifts. We've got some like cooking theme gifts and all that stuff. You can check it all out at maximumfun.org for its last join. But the important thing is like we, this is the one time here we do it and allows us to pay people like Rachel who has to hear us unfiltered. Yeah. Yeah. Just raw us and cut through a lot of cruft.

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And it means so much to us. If you can't, you know, we totally get it. But if you could share that link around or maybe, you know, ask a friend to kick in, just help spread the word. It all helps. It's all good. But mainly like it's a good time in a year to say, thanks. We really appreciate you. Yep.

You demand. Oh. You do demand. You do demand. You do demand. Maximumfun.org slash join. Whoa. Whoa.

What? You can't be surprised, Justin. You're not allowed to be surprised, bud. Well, you guys weren't. So I was, I said, what? Yeah, I said, I said something like, what is the most universal, like in English way to be surprised? Do you want to try again? You want to give it to me again and I give you a reaction that makes you feel something freaked this time, man.

No. No, that's okay. All right. I want to show you the doll first. Okay. Whoa. That sucks, juice. Hey, juice.

What? That one sucks. Yeah, juice. That one sucks. Not like in a fun way either, Justin. Sometimes the dolls are like, oh, what a silly clown boy. And this is like this. The doll who's seen some shit.

Yeah. This is a rough. This is a rough doll. A rough, rough doll. This is a haunted doll, baby boppy. Oh boy. Genuinely haunted. Genuinely haunted.

Yeah. But once again, I would say not haunted by spirits, but maybe just haunted by the past. Yeah. Just haunted by. Well, you should let me get through this one because baby boppy is going to take you on a little bit of a trip. A lot of these haunted dolls, the reason I haven't done many of them, a lot of them are starting to get like a little formulaic and honestly like they're getting a little sad.

There's a lot of. Yeah. But not this one. I mean, it is kind of. Haunted doll, baby boppy, genuinely haunted. The other ones. The other ones. Bullshit.

I've been faking. The other ones on here. Fake. The first thing I came to realize is that baby boppy while she is a girl doll. Uh-huh. The spirit inside her is a man. Oh. We love this.

2023, right? Yeah. We're crushing it. Yeah. We're crushing it. Thank you for accepting your doll for who they are. Unfortunately, it turns out that this doll is kind of a shithead. Wow.

But still. Not baby boppy. Not baby boppy. It says, uh, I call the doll boppy because sometimes when I'm in another room, it sounds like the Dopp is standing up and popping down and making a bop. The Dopp. That's what this word's entitled. The doll is plop and make a bop.

Make no mistake. It's definitely a masculine spirit. Okay. The doll itself is very old, very broke down. Just like a man. Yeah. Just like a man. The spirit in this doll has referred to themselves as Hal.

Then call it that. Call it Hal, asshole. Call it Hal, asshole. It's not baby boppy. Tal. Hal's a, uh, says he's an older man between 50 and 60 years old. You know how people ask you how old you are and you're like, eh. I guess we're 50 and 60.

To be fair, I often forget. Well, if someone asked me too quickly and I'm like 37, no wait, 38, 39. Sorry. I'm 39. So now it is kind of just easier to give a scale where I'm like late 30s for sure. Uh, he had one daughter and was married. He has lied about other things, but has been pretty consistent about this. Hmm.

All right. Hal seems like a peach. Yeah. Yeah. The physical condition of the doll is not great. Yeah. But was found in the woods near my aunt's house. Wait.

Those two ideas. The physical condition of the doll. I don't think butt is the modifier. Yeah. I think maybe because might be the word you're looking for there. That's the result of my kids playing those woods all the time and the doll simply appeared one day. Okay. This, this spirit will speak over the spirit box and while I wouldn't say he's a bad spirit.

Oh boy. He likes to see people worried and afraid. Huh. What's our metric? I mean, what's our metric? You know, what's our metric? Once again, 2023 sliding scale, man. Like there's worse spirits out there.

I guess. There's worse, but there's better. But there's way better and we can't just go. We can't write Hal a blank check to just be. Yeah. But let's get a little, let's get a little more specific. Well, this is why I like, and I brought her over here. This is Roberta.

And just a reminder, Roberta's modifier is neutral. Yeah. This is neutral. Yeah. This is neutral. But Travis got the best one. Mine is always whispering stuff. And my kids like to leave Roberta presence at this point.

We have a little gummy bear, uh, Christmas ornament that they bring her when she's hungry. Um, I'm just going to say positive Roberta now. That's because of your support for the max fun drive. Positive Roberta making the difference in Roberta's life. I wouldn't say he's a bad spirit. He likes to see people worried and afraid. Yeah. He seems to know the names of the people in my house.

Oh, that's kind. He likes to say, he likes to say things such as put a name here has cancer. Whoa. And other things to have you scared. Whoo. Whoo. Whoo. Now to be fair, that's a thing we haven't explored in a lot of ghost like based movies

like paranormal 18 or whatever. The ghost just walks in like, Hey man, you should get that checked. What? Why? Hmm. I don't know. This wasn't like that. Whoo.

It's just a pale ghost climbs out of TV and is like good blood pressure. It's pretty bad. Hey, when was the last time you checked your credit score? Oh, it's, it's been a while. Why? No reason. I want to hear more about this. For instance, one time my husband took my kids with him to the store and how he began

saying, your family car accident, dying, hurry. And just repeating things like, hurry, there's no time until I found out they were fine. And in no way in any accident. And then he yells, gotcha and turn to the camera man and said, you've been watching crazy house YouTube videos. So he likes to lie. But other than that, he doesn't cause much trouble. I would say that's a, that's a bit of trouble.

It's a good chunk of trouble for a doll in my home. Especially when in the past, we've talked about evil spirits are like flip lights on and off. Yeah. No, this is, this is pretty bad. House giving you cancer scares. This is what, this is maybe one of my favorite sentences in one of these ever. So I'm going to read the whole sentence. So he likes to lie.

But other than that, he doesn't cause much trouble. He can lie to cat ball when he wants and isn't very respectful. But I don't think he would actually cause anyone harm. He just talks a lot of shit. Wow. A cat girl. How does it do footsteps? No, don't even fucking ask pal.

Don't even ask him. How does it do the footsteps or banging on walls? Just pops. So it slides into house Instagram DMs and it's like, hey, how much for footsteps? I don't do footsteps. Do you do footsteps? How do you do foot stuff like steps? No.

When he decides to let you know. I can't lie to cat ball or maybe I can. What was it? Light. I can't lie to cat ball when he wants and he isn't very respectful. Yeah. That's all you're thinking you need to know. When he wants to talk, sometimes he will light his cat ball just once to let you know

he wants you to turn on the spirit box. He doesn't do anything on command. So all in all, I would say how is just kind of like having some control in little ways and his stubborn. It kind of sounds like having the most bored like grandfather living with you. I'm just like, yeah, man, I'll engage on my left. Oh, it's war with grandpa too. Baby.

He's revenge. Travis, it's so funny you say that because it says here when you call him out online, he may cuss at you. Having howl around is like having a grumpy old man around who doesn't really mean any harm. He just likes to do things for the attention. I think. Yeah. Okay.

Sure. Sure. Yeah. I mean, it seems pretty harmful. Some of the more stressful things that he's doing to you in your life. Sure. Yeah. Fine.

So I just Googled what a cat. I just had to Google what a cat ball was. Oh. Because I thought it was some sort of like acronym for like, you know, spectral activity. Well, I don't know. But it's just, is it just a toy that a cat plays with? Yeah, it's just a toy a cat plays with. Well, that's the amazing thing about being a spiritual investigator, Griffin.

Anything can become a tool, right? Anything can look around you. Yeah. It's a spiritual tool. If you want it to be, you know what I mean? Yeah. Great point. Thank you.

Anyone, you could start being a spiritual investigator right now with just things around your home. I got to start keeping funnier props on my desk. Yeah. I was just thinking the same thing as I started that bit. I don't have anything here. Nothing funny. I got neutral Roberta. Yeah.

But she is not funny. She's neutral. I mean, I got this. What is that? You guys want me to put on this cap? Yeah. I have this tartan cap. Where'd you find it, John?

Oh, no. Is this like today's special? It's like today's special. No, we can't. I become Daniel Day-Lewis. Don't do it. I'm gonna be fair, Justin, if we're following today's special logic, it would be Daniel Knight-Lewis. Thank you very much.

Yes, please. Wow. That's actually really specifically targeted. Yeah. Very powerful. I'm almost 25 years old and I've never been on a plane. My parents want to do a family vacation somewhere tropical next year and I'm not sure to expect when I get on a plane.

What's the best way to exist on an airplane? What do I do so I don't freak out? That's from 25-year-old flight virgin in Boston, Mass, Massachusetts. I feel like those are two different questions. What happened there? Justin Matthews. He thought about doing Boston Mass and then I think he chickened out. Yeah.

Oh, I thought it was like somebody doing a Boston accent, like 25-year-old flight virgin, Boston, Mass. Not bad. Boston, Mass. Yeah, that was bad. That wasn't good. Listen, one of us is clearly the voice guy and it ain't me. Let's do Yoda with a Boston accent.

If you guys can give me a couple reads of Yoda with a Boston accent. You get on the plane. You go. Like them apples, do you? How do you like them apples? Nope. That was the right order. Like them apples, how?

You're going to have a group on your ticket and then they'll call for your group and get on. Yeah. That part you got. You go to the seat that matches your seat. There's some reason that defies logic. One out of every four times, someone will already be in your seat. Yes.

Even though you yourself have never fucked this up in your entire life, a good amount of the time, there will already be someone who has fucked up getting in the right seat. Yeah. So you tell them to move and then you sit in their seat. If you're as much as I can do, what you will do then is you will unpack your overly packed carry on bag because you assume that in this like hour and 15 minute flight, you would need 18 hours worth of entertainment and you'll stuff it all into the seat. You have to unfurl it.

You have to unfurl it. You can't be stuffing your bag. You got to take out your different doodads and your activity books and the bag of munchos that you brought with you and put them all in different places. And then you will proceed to play off brand candy crush on your phone for the entirety of the flight and never once touch the novel that you told yourself you were going to read. You told yourself you're not going to touch that novel. You're going to do a lot of trying to watch movies on the screen of the person sitting

in front of you without just watching it yourself because it seems like easier this way. You might get distracted by the fact that there is a man sitting in front of you watching what appears to be the prestige, but he doesn't have subtitles on and there's no headphones plugged in, but he's watching every second of it. And you're going to be thinking, is he getting as much out of this as he could? What's he doing? And then suddenly you're landing. You're going to be freaked out by, you're going to see old men who have brought a newspaper

to entertain them on the flight. And that's really going to trip you out because like, what if there's nothing in there they want to do or read? And then they'll be very stressful for you. Then I'm keeping an eye on them like, do they need a magazine? Yeah. Are they okay? Maybe I could help.

I'm working on a spreadsheet on a full blown laptop and you're like, what are you, wait, how important is your business that you're doing it right now? Like what are you, you're in the sky, we're in the sky and you're working on business? I do take, I mean, I take, I become kind of a looky Lou on an airplane. I do like seeing what other kind of entertainment options people are enjoying. One time I did watch Hacksaw Ridge through a sort of two inch gap of the seats in front of me, which was a wild flit guys, wild, wild flit. That's what Mel wanted.

That's what Mel wanted when he made that one. That's actually how we watch Bailey's. Yeah. Lying around on a plane. But when some of them are really good, oh yeah. I love the part where the hacksaw. I can't wait to be in daddy's home too. Oh, this is good.

Hold it. Cow over. He's got to see some of this. This is some bloody shit. It's really good. My gear is cranking. That's actually really good. Justin.

Why can't, oh, I'm only the only one who can't, I just can't do cool voices like that. If someone is working on business on their laptop on the plane and the brightness is at a certain level, I cannot stop myself from becoming fucking Jason Bourne. Just like, yeah, I wonder what job they have. Let's see if I can figure it out by what data they're inputting into these cells. Yeah. Sometimes I feel like I'm going to look over and someone's just writing spreadsheets, spreadsheets, spreadsheets, spreadsheets, spreadsheets inside of the spreadsheet.

And then you look up and they're looking directly at you. There will also be someone who has a window seat that can't be bothered to close the window when every other single fucking person has closed it. They're not looking out. In fact, this is what's going to drive you crazy. They're trying to sleep. Yep. With an in front, next to an open window.

Oh, and if it's nighttime, they also might have turned on their overhead light to try to go to sleep. Yes. Yes. Oh, you're going to want to get a ginger ale. Oh, yeah. That's not me giving you advice. I'm saying when you are on there, you are going to want a ginger ale.

Yeah. You should lean into that. Your body knows that it needs the Sky Ale. You never wanted one before in your life. Never wanted one any other time. Ropes. They come by, you're going to want that Sky Ale. Yeah.

You're going to demand it. 100%. 100%. And listen, as soon as it starts, the person in front of you is going to recline their seat. You might be tempted to then reactively recline your seat so that the lines are the same, but don't. This is going to start a chain reaction until the plane tilts upwards at an uncomfortable

angle. And then the pilot has to fly the plane at an angle. Different. It's. Yeah. It's supposed to fly the plane different. Create a whole problem. Don't do it.

You're going to be fine. And don't ask if you can fly the, if you can have a turn flying the plane. Because someone's already asked and the fact, the chance that you're probably the third person and they've already let two people do it, they're not going to let a third person do it. Even if you say it as a joke, sometimes the captain will say, yeah, cause I got to go. And he runs in the bathroom and locks the door. And now guess what?

You've got to, you really do have to fly the plane. Now he's laughing. And don't do the, there's something on the wing from Twilight Zone unless you're in a. Twilight Zone. If you're in a window seat, then you can do it once, once, but what if there is something on the wing? You ever thought about that?

Stop it. Don't, don't talk. Have you looked? I'm in culinary school currently. I have a big project at the end of this. That's cool. Not me. No, this is the.

No, no, no. I know. I'm saying it's cool that this person's like in food school. That's cool. Yeah. Yeah. That's cool. I have a big project do at the end.

I have a big project do at the end of this semester that involves running a hypothetical fine dining restaurant. I get to name the restaurant and I'm struggling to come up with something that sounds refined enough to be convincing fine dining establishment. Google keeps telling me to name it stuff like five archers dining hall. Oh, that's. That's the vibe I want to give off any ideas. That's from needing a nuanced name in New Orleans.

Oh, well, if it's in New Orleans, it's in New Orleans. It's in New Orleans. You know, it's been a while since we've done a help me name this thing, right? But sure. The thing I'm looking at like three foodies on the screen right now, right? This is the thing we can do. This isn't like name my gerbil or whatever. Who knows?

The restaurant? The lack of details, though, again, like you all have to help us. No, no, no, no. Justin, there are no details. They are waiting on this name to have you ever watched restaurant, restaurant wars? You know, restaurant, restaurant wars. Restaurant, restaurant wars. When they do restaurant wars.

Yo, together, man. They figure out the name of the rest, the restaurant first, and then they figure out like what the menu is going to be around it. So this is. Have you watched it, Justin? Have you watched junkyard restaurant? Yeah, I've seen it. Yes.

You got Joe and. The junkyard restaurant wars? You watched it, right? Here's my first. With robots? Spice. Oh. Fuck yeah.

And it can be like spinach, but you took the gnaw out of it. Yeah, it's just, it's like, but it's also kind of like, it's like spice, the E got turned up on its side and turned into an H. Yeah. And it's called spice. Spice? Spice. Now, what is it? Forget to say, isn't it?

It doesn't feel so to say, what are they specializing? Spice food. Spice food. That's food that does not have the normal spices that you would expect. That's a fun aspect. See if you make all the waiters talk like that. There's mustard. There's mustard.

There's mustard. Mustard. Kessup. Yeah. Yeah. Mustard and Kessup. Relish. They got relish.

They got blanket gravy as much as you want. They'll keep bringing it. That's lovely. We're getting, I feel, away from a fine dining asset because really do I go to like a five star restaurant and they're like, how much gravy do you want? It's a same blanket. It's a high quality, high tech style blanket. Oh, this is kind of my take on gravy.

It's a blanket. I am not so deeply entrenched in the DC food scene, but in Austin, the hot thing was to name your restaurant. If it was a fine dining Michelin star restaurant, you named it something like the garage. Or the stinky pit. Laundrette is what, actually, I think that that's a different type of thing. French laundry is like a thing. Yeah, it's like a thing.

Yeah. You want, I think like one word and maybe an article in front of it, right? A workshop. But I think that the is played out, right? What if you call it a workshop? Hmm. Huh? Slop.

Town. Slop town. Slop town. You call it something like Slop Town, and then they're like, what, that sounds like a gross name. And it's like, because you don't understand the context of it. There's a very special cuisine where Slop is good and fancy. What about Hogtrough?

Hogtrough. It's a little. What about this? What about the post office, the United States Postal Service? Really good, Justin. I love that. United States Postal Service Veterans Memorial Boulevard Field Office. That's great.

That's the name of the restaurant. Number, and then you put like a pound, number 63 or whatever at the end. So people will think like, that's got to be a post, like it's got to be a post office. That's got to be a post office. And when they pull up, oh, what's it themed like? I'm glad you asked. A post office. Yeah.

Can you mail things from there? Yeah. You can mail things from anywhere. Absolutely. Can you get good service and fine dining? Yeah. Probably. Yeah.

Yeah. Now we're working out some kinks. Yeah, man. We had a kitchen when we moved in, so that was definitely a bit of a hindrance, but we can figure it out. Let me flip this. We've got a little hot plate back here. What do you want?

Let me flip this one by you guys, McDonald's. It's going to, you see it and you're like, that's wild that this McDonald's franchise made a typo, but then you see the menu and they have sweet breads and they have Rockefeller oysters. They got baked Alaska. In my mind, these are the fancies. No, they sound really fancy when you said them. I mean, not the sweet bread part, but what if you just call it like that?

They would just change every, every entree would be a McDonald's entree that they've made fancy by changing one word. So you go in and you say, um, I'll have the fig mac, please, an excellent, oh, a fig mac. That's a excellent choice. I'll have the quarter flounder, please. Oh, that's a very good one and that's so expensive because it's just a little bit of flounder.

But boy, is it good. It's so expensive. I don't have any good puns. That's okay. Yeah. That's all right. You'll come when you think of one. Yeah.

Just let, no, just let clipping Yoda. Yeah. No, we need a certain moment. At any moment. At any moment. I swear to God, our oath that clipping Yoda will only show up maybe once or twice a year must be ironclad. We cannot break this, this trust that exists between us and our audience.

Can I? Sure. Okay. Let's go with that. Try this. F, U with an umlaut, D. Fjöd. Fjöd.

Fjöd. Fjöd. This is my restaurant. Hey, should we go eat at Fjöd? Try it. That's cool. Fjöd. Should we eat at Fjöd?

That could be cool. Fjöd. F, E, U, D. And you walk into the restaurant and then they're like chicken or beef and you're like, this is a restaurant, not a wedding. And then they're like chicken or beef and you're like, I guess I'll take the chicken. They sit you on the chicken side. There's a chicken side and a beef side and they do everything they can to sort of stoke

the fires of war between these two halves of this fancy upscale restaurant. Bad news. Fjöd was the name of a vegan restaurant in the west side of Kansas City and it did close in 2017. So we tried it. The name is... Didn't work. They weren't ready in 2017.

That was pre-COVID. Okay. Things are different now. Oh, things are different. You're with an umlaut in CH. Munch. Munch. Munch.

Munch. I don't think that's it. I don't think that's going to be it. That's not the vibe that people are going for anymore. It's just like... Dugs place. Dugs house. Dugs house is good.

Dugs house. Dugs house. You want to go eat over at Dugs house? Yeah, man. So when you get there, the host, his name is Doug and it looks like a house but each room is like a separate little dining room and you eat in there and it's high upscale comfort food. It's high upscale low country.

Big tables. Big chairs. Yes. Everybody's in a high chair. All the food is chicken nuggets and mac and cheese. And a window for sandwiches. Yes. Yes.

Yes, please. They ask you if you want the crust cut off. Do you want triangles or squares when I cut your sandwich up? Yes, please. If you eat two bites of broccoli, they'll give you $50. Oh, I love this. Your meal is free. Yeah.

If you will just eat two bites of broccoli, you can have whatever you want on the menu. Just eat two bites. If you would just eat two bites, anything that you can have whatever you want. Two bites, please. Come on. One bite. One bite. One bite.

Such good restaurant tours. Restaurant guys. Did you watch the bear? You guys watch the bear? Kick-ass show. But also, I think it could be... It could be better. Not making a show but just sort of like running a beef restaurant.

I can't watch it because the idea of like just a bear wandering into a kitchen is terrifying to me. It's fucked up how it keeps happening and they keep putting down so many honey-covered traps and the bear outsmarts them every episode and steals all of their food. Well, it's like they said, you know Ratatouille, it's great and he's little, but what if we went bigger? And it's a bear who wants to be a chef and he sits on a man's head. Well, when cousin Jimmy brings in the bear to the restaurant in the first episode, he

does shout like, we're going to do a Ratatouille this time. But then the main guy with the curly hair, he's like, get that fucking bear out of here, Jimmy. Yeah. And then they fight for like 12 minutes. Him and the bear? No, the cousin and the curly- Well, the bear looks like, guys, please don't.

Guys, this isn't what I wanted. I'll leave. I'll leave. It's fine. I know when I'm not wanted and I'll go. Yeah. Jimmy, I'll see you at home. I love you.

Yeah. But then when they save the president from choking on the beef sandwich in episode two, that's when they took off for me. It's just the second episode. Oh, Isaac. Yes. Oh, sorry. Hi.

Hi. Hello, my name is Isaac. I'm a child chocolatier, a prodigy since five years old, but you have not to fear. I love to eat chocolate. I love to podcast. I'm a child chocolatier. Welcome back, Isaac. Hi, Isaac.

Hi. Thanks for letting me come back on your show. Yeah. We're really excited to come to the show. I noticed in your theme song, buddy, because when you sang it last time, I didn't know who you were, that you said that you love to eat chocolate in it. Yeah, I tried it. Finally.

It's good. It's a big thing. I liked it. What did you do? What did you go in with? What was your on-ramp? Just go straight. Hershey's.

100 percent. 100 percent. No sugar. Straight to the bone. Powdered. Wait. Isaac, did you- I took a third cup of powdered unsweetened cocoa, and I just chocolate is, here's my

review, drier than I thought it would be. That kind of seems like you snuck it, Isaac. That doesn't seem like something a parent would give you. Yeah. Yeah. I play by my own rules now, because I got famous on your podcast, and I do whatever I want. I have my parents know that I'm a meal ticket, and they love me.

I'm their little superstar, they say. They said that to you? They said, that's where the money is, podcast. It's nice when they actually say it, you know? Can I tell you guys about something I heard about? Yeah, please. I love that. Extra gum?

No extra gum? Oh, okay. Like the brand extra, not just someone who has too much gum, which is what I really thought you meant. I really thought you were just talking about it, yeah. There's a news story here in the paper, it says, extra pink lemonade is here to bring the summer vibes. And that's in a paper, a newspaper that you're reading.

Move over, Winterblues. Extra pink lemonade is here to bring the summer vibes. It's a new limited edition flavor to the lineup, extra pink lemonade, and it's going to deliver early taste of sunshine filled summer days to consumers through the introduction of a new and bright vibrant flavor. Are you a chewing gum fan, Isaac? No. Each fruity, tart, and deliciously sweet bite of extra's gum, pink lemonade, transports

consumers into a warmer season and usher's in the comfort of sunshine through the vibrant, refreshing, and long lasting flavor for which extra is known. Make a lot of big promises, extra. From gum. I'm going through a lot of seasonal, effective disorders. I need some gum. I need some gum. The gum will fix it.

This lady here is talking. She's at the gum company and she says, we hope extra pink lemonade flavor will inspire moments of everyday happiness and become the perfect companion for ushering in the highly anticipated spring sunshine. Wow. So pink lemonade is a beloved flavor that's sure to be an extra fan favorite and perfect to be shared while connecting with friends and family no matter what the weather is outside. Here's why I wanted to ask you guys because you're grown ups and I'm just a kid who gives

a shit. Whoa, Isaac. I'm just saying, I don't know who care if you guys went to the store today and you saw extra pink lemonade, would you think, oh, an exciting new opportunity to taste the spring sunshine? Or would you think nothing at it, would you think nothing at it and just think that's probably been there forever? That's right, but she's forever.

That second one, Isaac, but now knowing this because of the helpful press release you've given me, I know that I can stop taking my Lexapro and simply start chewing this pink lemonade gum every 10 minutes or so. It doesn't last, I mean, extra long or whatever. The thing that I think is interesting is that this story came out of the newspaper on March 7th and it says here that the gum began hitting shelves in January, so it makes me feel like maybe they even didn't care so much about it. Were they overestimated?

They thought we should tell somebody about the new gum we made up. You know that there was back in January, Isaac, because somebody said we should put out a press release on it, but there's nothing they said we don't need to. We also made ourselves a self. We're making a lot of big promises. It would be cool if extra rate of press release that started. You fucking idiots. Yeah.

We put this gum out for you two months ago. Do you have eyes? Like, hey, when you buy groceries, do you just run through the checkout aisle like some sort of crazed orangutan? No? You don't? Then why aren't you buying our fucking gum? We worked really hard to make this gum to make you happy.

We crushed up Xanax in it. Why aren't you chewing this gum? And make it feel like it's sunny outside. What's going to make you feel like it's sunny? It's gum. It's just gum. And call your mom. Call your mom.

Try our gum. Just buy more of it or something. Please. What do we do in here? It's like gum doesn't even matter to you. It's like you guys don't care about new gums. Hey, Isaac. Yeah?

It's pretty cool. What's up? It's pretty fun doing a podcast, right? I could tell you were nervous the first time around. Yeah, but now I'm kind of like... You're comfortable. Now I'm kind of a shock... Shock...

Did you hear when I said shit? Whoa. Yeah. Two times, man. The FCC is going to find us. No, they're not. Isaac, it doesn't... It doesn't work like that, man.

If you want to get raunchy, this is the... This is the place, man. Monetize it, you know what I'm saying? Okay. Chocolate's going under. You know that, right? It doesn't have the long-lasting power of podcasting. Let me go to my local candy store.

Oh, wait, there are none because they sell it fucking everywhere. Right. You know what I mean? You need to find other revenues. You're young enough that it's not too late for you to find other revenue streams and really kind of diversify your portfolio. Do you guys know any books about podcasting that can help me? Yeah.

There's probably one or two out there. Probably actually a lot. Actually, I'm thinking about it. Probably a lot. One's that were a commercial success when they put on Sam. Oh, okay. I don't know if any of those off the top of my head. Isaac.

Once it earned out there in advance, like... We understand the concept, Isaac, only to all too well, my friend. Are you... I feel like you want me to wrap it up. I feel like my segment's done for this week. Is that okay? I can hop down. I need to hop down because my legs are getting tired.

I feel like there's a lot more to you than to explore, my friend. I'm going to calm down. Mr. Justin, take over. Bye, Uncle Griffin. Bye, Uncle Travis. Oh, my God. Now, do you think that... Wait, hold on.

You assume that that was like a fun, like, you know, you call your parents, friends, what was that? He's Isaac Justin's kid? Whoa, Isaac's chocolate shop just fell apart behind Justin. Justin just closed the fucking Tesseract. I'm back. He's back. Yeah, yeah, and you're totally in frame.

Really good, too, is the best part. I can fix it. Who cares? Like, I can fix it. It's fine. Hey, can I talk about something with the Max Fun Drive real quick? Yeah. Before we wrap up?

Yeah. You know what? Here's an update. Here's something. You've heard us talk about stretch goals. Last week, we talked about stretch goals. We talked about it on our social meds. And you know what?

Don't say that. Don't say that. Don't say that. Can't say social meds? Oh, sorry. No. I'm sorry. I can't say social meds.

Cool energy for the ass, Trav. Anyways. Good energy for the ass. Anyways, sorry about these snowflakes, but we've talked about stretch goals, and you know what we decided, stretch goals, it's a reward, right, for people joining. So why gate it, right? We're changing the way we're doing things over here. We're just going to put those out on the bonus content feed.

So if you're a Max Fun supporter at any level, you'll have access to, let's see, we're going to put out the video of us absolutely spiraling, trying to come up with a year name. We're going to do the BYOP Pizza Party on the Macquarie YouTube channel. That one's just, we didn't change that one just because we want to eat, we just want to eat pizza. I'm so excited to try it. You guys, I've heard. Okay.

My mouth's watering. I'm scared of how wet it's going to be. Yeah, I've seen that. There's a lot of wet stuff under the sheets. We talked about that in the Philip Seymour Hoffman movie, along came Polly, famously how greasy and wet the pizza is, and he has to dab it off. And then Philip Seymour Hoffman rings the pizza onto the other guy's pizza, whose name I can't recall.

Anyways, we're going to put out the commentary for episode six of the show. We're putting it all out there. We're putting it all out there. Let it hang loose. We've got other fun events for Max Fun Drive. I do have to plug because it'll be, you don't want to miss out on this. And 9 p.m. on Wednesday, this Wednesday, March 29th, Sid and I are going to watch, I believe, in Santa on Netflix.

Holy shit. And you all, if you probably haven't watched it and you're in, back me up. You're in for a real fucking treat. It is the wildest flick. I cannot believe that this is not the biggest movie on the planet after this past holiday season. Wild. Wait, we're going to watch it together for no reason.

It's a Christmas movie. We're watching it in March. There's no reason behind it, but we just adore it. It'll be like my fifth watch. And I'm so excited. I'm so I've watched Paul Boatman Cop 2 once a year for like eight years. And I dread it more than I dread watching this movie for the sixth time in like three months. This is a kick ass flick.

Kick ass flick. And go to YouTube and search for MacRoy Family and just go and subscribe there and watch the streams we've been doing for the last week and a half and watch the stuff that's coming up. It's all going to be there. You can also follow the MacRoy Family on Instagram for updates and any information you need. It's all going to be right there.

Listen, this is our approximately 38th Maximum Fun Drive with the Max Fun Network. We've been asking you to support us financially. For over a decade now. And a lot of you have done that and that's huge for us personally and professionally. But if I may go ahead, more of you have it. Oh, wow. Speaking of that, like on the grand scale of like the world, there's like nine billion people in the world who have not done that.

And we would really things are a little slow if you've been paying attention. And we but we know that the real heroes are just hanging back, waiting for Sergeant Slaughter to get a chair or, you know, wrestling. And we know you're just waiting back for your big moment. And this is it. We come on, grab a grab a chair. Get in here. Get in this Royal Rumble of generosity and kindness.

We've been able to make this our livelihoods for a very long time now because of the support we get from the Max Fun Drive. We do ads on the show occasionally. But if you've listened to really any podcasts at all, you know that advertising pretty much across the industry is not doing great. And so more than ever, we are relying on the the money you all give during the Max Fun Drive to keep keep growing. We've managed to hire like a bunch of people.

And that's been absolutely incredible for us to one, have the time to be able to make more stuff and, you know, hang out with our families and stuff and to put together like a team of people that we genuinely adore working with and have made some really cool stuff. We're really proud of all of that is possible because of of you, because of the people who have supported us in the Max Fun Drive in the past. And if you haven't done that, this is this is your chance to very directly contribute to something that you that you enjoy listening to.

Yeah, at this point, you're not just supporting us and supporting co-hosts on various shows. As Griffin said, you're supporting our team because we listen. I'm going to take a bold stand here. We believe in paying people what they're worth. And that's true. And thank thanks to you, Max Fun supporters. We are able to do that and we want to be able to continue to do that

and do like, you know, cost of living raises and give them raises and maybe even grow the business. Folks, this is business one on one. I know you're traveling until you know it's business. It's business one on one. It's business. You got to pay people to make money. Is that I think that's how the phrase we're in so deep.

Yeah. Maxfunfun.org slash join is the link you can go to. This is our last week of talking about it. I'm going to go to our YouTube channel. We have a bunch of fun stuff. We're going to keep doing stuff there all week long. Lots of streams, lots of stuff. If you're not able to support us now, you don't have the means.

We give, man, we get it. Listen, we totally get it. Tell a friend, maybe. Maybe think about telling a friend. Share that link around Maxfunfun.org slash join. If you're already a member and you've been listening forever and you have a little bit of extra spun duly lying around, maybe thinking about boosting or upgrading your membership.

If you make it to the next tier, then you'll get all the awesome pledge gifts that we have there. But most importantly, you get the feeling of satisfaction that you have helped very, very directly to put stuff into the world that you enjoy. So yeah, thank you. That's, oh, thanks to Montaigne for the use of our theme song. My life is better with you. Always gets, always gets my day.

Started on the right foot. Yep. Trab, you want to bring us home with a quote? You got a quote for us? I sure do, Justin. Let me pick the perfect one. Yeah, please pick the perfect one if you could. Yeah, this is, I don't know if I've done this one or not.

Let me know if I have. Okay, I eat cold eels and think distant thoughts. Jack Johnson. No, I haven't heard that one. You're sure you remember that one, Jack? Yeah, my name is Justin McRoy. I'm Travis McRoy. I'm Griffin McRoy.

It's been my brother, my brother, me. Kiss your dad, square on the lips. It's better with you.