My Brother, My Brother And Me - MBMBaM 656: Shagworth Boombastic

Episode Date: April 17, 2023

Have we got a deal for you! Pick a very high value coin – like the PR 70 Deep Cameo PCGS Quarter. Yeah, the one that's worth $17,250. You can have it! The only thing is that you have to . . . you have to eat the quarters.Suggested talking points: Heaven Gets Screeners, Occam's Candybar, [e-mail], Bat Bones, Poo-doku, Hungry for ChangeTransgender Law Center: https://transgenderlawcenter.org/ 

The McElroy brothers are not experts, and their advice should never be followed. Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it. Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mention only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby? To a precious friendship I could've never seen what was coming for me Hangs at the skate park, hangs by the beach My life

It feels love It's better, it's better with you My life It's better, it's better with you This is true It's better, it's better with you My life It's better with you

Hello everybody and welcome to my brother, my brother, me and advice show for the modern era. I'm your oldest brother, Justin McElroy. I'm your middle brother, Travis McElroy. It's a me, your sweet baby brother, Griffin McElroy. Gosh, it's a Mario, Marty. Wait, are we talking about Mario? We're gonna do Mario Watch. Did we talk about Mario last week?

We talked about how we didn't talk about Mario last week. We did talk about Mario, and then tomorrow we're talking about it on Besties, but you have a different skeered view. We also recorded a whole, we did a whole stream playing Mario, talking about Mario. You really got the big plumber on the brain. The big plumber has really, he really reset the culture for me. Now I'll say what's interesting, I would not say his defining feature is big. Like as a thing, he's actually quite small compared to Bowser. No, but he's big in my fucking brain, Travis, I got room for nothing else.

Do you know that 90% of American children pray to Mario more than Jesus? That's fucked up. It's messed up, this is a messed up world. And you know what, my daughter, my daughter can't identify Smokey the Bear, but Mario, she knows right away, skewed. I showed my daughter a picture of McGruff, the crime dog, and she said that Yoshi sucks ass. That's a bad Yoshi. I showed her a picture of Joseph Gordon-Biden, and she was like, is that Mario's dad? It was so weird.

I was reading the Bible to my boys last night after, no, before Butterfly Kisses. And they were like, these aren't cheat codes for Super Mario Brothers. That was like, it doesn't all have to be like, I know you like it when daddy reads you the game facts of all the cheat codes from Super Mario Brothers, but it's Bible time. I showed my daughters a picture of John Leguizamo and I said, is this Luigi? And they said, I don't know. And I said, not in this house! He's not our Luigi! I did the opposite.

It's fine. We're obviously on different sides of this issue. Look at the Shred Holidays, the Mario Citrus Holidays apart. It's fine. We don't have to raise our kids exactly the same. No. And that's a lesson. I think this country, this like wild mixed up country of ours could learn.

It's okay if you don't like or do like different stuff from the rest of it. There's actually room, I think that there's room to understand that all Luigi's are canonical Luigi's, right? Yes. That they are all just different facets of one, now there is only one Mario. I mean, obviously, there's only one Mario. But yeah, it's Bob Hoskins. It's Bob Hoskins's. But they didn't even let John Leguizamo have a mustache.

I like that somebody apparently, I think it was Variety. Variety asked Johnny Legues, like, hey, are you gonna go see the Mario movie? And he said, hell no. And here's the thing. Once again, I only read the headline, but it's framed like, oh, John Leguizamo, so upset. But here's the thing. Maybe he's like super busy or maybe he's like, maybe he doesn't see movies at all anymore. Like there, they could have been any movie and he's like, hell no, they scare me now.

I've been in too many of them. I know what it's like. It's scary movies. Movies are scary to me. He had an amazing quote when he was cast as Luigi, where somebody asked him like, do you think it's a strange casting choice that you are not an Italian gentleman and you'll be playing this Italian Italian character, very famously Italian character. And he was like, Pachino played Scarface.

It's fucking great, John. It's actually so funny. That's very good, John. Excellent work. Yeah. Full marks, you know, somebody asked Bob Hoskins if he was going to go see the Super Mario Brothers movie and he said, you wasted a genie wish to ask me this. Of course I am.

I like to think. Heaven gets screeners. No, Travis, because he's dead. No, I know. He passed away. I like to think. Wait, hold on. Ghosts can't watch movies.

No, it's just the way you sat on my very funny punchline made me feel like you didn't know that what it was. You didn't get it. No, I got it. Okay. I like to think that Heaven gets screeners, that they all kind of gather around to watch in the Ponderosa, like when they show like new Adam Sandler movies as a reward challenge on Survivor.

Uh-huh. And they can just bring in whoever, maybe it's like Wednesday nights, they all get together and just watch movies. That's what my heaven. That's nice, Griffin. That's what I think. All movies? No, just like the hot new ones.

I love when Survivor shows people movies. And these are people that have looked at crabs for 27 days straight. Yeah. So they're like, fucking Jack Black is back in Gulliver's Travels. This is actually the most exciting thing that's happened to me for literal months. I've eaten nothing but sand and rice for 30 days. Have you guys seen fucking Gulliver's Travels? They gave us popcorn.

I'm as high as a fucking kite. This movie fucks, I think it's six hours long. I love it. God, have you guys ever really eaten jujubes? These things are wild. It's so good. This is an advice show. But before we begin.

What? I have a new game. Oh man, really? So early? Yeah. It's good. I like to, I prefer to actually do them, like get them out of the way. Yeah, let's kick it off.

So the other day, I was listening through my Pitbull playlist. And I started thinking about Mr. Worldwide. And I started thinking about musician nicknames. So I've looked up musician nicknames in a game I'm calling Mr. Nickname. And Mr. Nickname is going to give you the musician appellation. Now, it's, I must, must clarify. I have no idea what the accreditation of these are except that they're on a wiki article about nicknames for musicians. But I want you guys to tell me the musician.

Are you ready? Yes, go. Voice of a generation. Me? Bruce Springsteen. Oh, that would be Christina Aguilera. Damn it. What?

King of slackers. Right. John Mayer. Good guess. Rivers Cuomo. Beck. Okay, yes. Now this one, I'm going to give you guys these, there's three here.

And I think by the third one, you'll get it. These are three nicknames for the same artist. Okay. The Picasso of Pop. The Picasso of Pop. Yeah. That's Paul Simon. Carly Rae Jobson.

The master of reinvention. Oh, that's Mabana. Madonna. Madonna. The same person. Yes. Okay. Griffin.

Justin Timberlake. Ooh. The king of glam rock. Me? A bold choice. David Bowie. Huh? David Bowie.

That's correct, Justin. David Bowie. Justin's on the board. Woo! Okay, one more. And this is maybe my favorite nickname for a human being ever. King of the movie soundtrack. Oh, Jared Goldsmith.

No. Hans Zimmer. Kenny Loggins. Kenny Loggins. The king of the movie soundtrack, Kenny Loggins. Now why do I bring this up? Because I want great point Travis, because so far there's been no jokes. Because here's the thing, I can't figure out the right set of search terms to find more

nicknames like Mr. Worldwide that someone has given themselves. And I can't find it. I can't find it. And I'm not on Twitter anymore. So I'm using this as a platform. Hey everyone, email me more nicknames like Mr. Worldwide. With the source, please. With the source, so that I can do a fun version of the bit I just subjected you.

Jesus Christ. What about Mr. Neumbastic? Who is that? What's the real name of that person, Justin? Shaggy. What's Shag? I mean his Christian name. Shagworth Boombastic.

Shagworth Boombastic. They call me Mr. Boombastic because my Christian last name is Boombastic and my first name is Shagworth. But my father was Mr. Boombastic, please call me Shaggy. Call me Shagworth. Call me Shagworth. Shaggy to my friend. Well, many lovers call me Shaggy. We have a platform on this show to do great things.

Yes. Terrible things. I do not know that submitting our audience to a bad version of a thing and then asking for their help to make it good is something we should, we could, should ethically sort of do. But we haven't tried it yet. You know what, Griffin, this is episode 56, a palindrome. Yeah. And that's the time to try, I should have waited 10 episodes to do evil things, shouldn't I? Your games.

Trav, you should, Trav. Trav, there's a good way to get out of listeners being mad at you for this. What's that? It's like, I wasn't you. That's good. I get it. Sometimes, Trav, your interests in bits for the show become just trivia. Just trivia.

I don't know, but this is a good point. Why does it have to be funny all the time? Yeah, man. Why does that have to be funny all the time? Sometimes it can move you. Yeah. Sometimes you can learn something. Yeah.

Sometimes you can have a laugh. It's more like Kathy and Hoda. Yes, thank you. You're learning something. You're sitting with friends. You're learning something. You're having an eye opener. Can I say, I don't think Kathy's on it either.

Jennifer Garner's new job, like what's going on with her? Yeah, I don't know. I don't think Kathy's on it. I don't know. I don't think Kathy's on it anymore. Sure. Yeah, it doesn't matter. The fourth hour is what I'm talking about.

The fourth hour, whoever has their hand, the steady hand on the till. Me? I watched Al Roker this morning while I was waiting at the dermatologist's office. I watched Al Roker scream out loud for 30 seconds to avoid hearing succession spoilers. That's good. It was really good. They just cut down. He had his head between his legs like, ah!

I don't even watch that show. I'm about to DM that fool some succession spoilers for what he's done to me in the past, how he sort of victimized me in the past. Yeah. This I am relieved to inform you is an advice show, and I am very, very happy to say that we have a whole fresh batch of questions for you. Hot, hot, hot. So fresh.

I work at a movie theater and it amazes me how wasteful people are. I found everything from mostly full popcorn bags to unopened bottles of wine. That second one is what gets me. Why buy overpriced concessions just to let it get thrown away? They sell bottles of wine at movie theaters? Wow. Sometimes. It's a good flick.

Anyway, I find an unopened candy bar and my mind gear start to turn, kept safe from surrounding trash, sealed away in its wrapper in a Twix bar. Is it weird for me to take it out and eat it? That's from Cookie Bar Taker in Texas. I almost don't want to even do this one because you can't say, is it weird to take it out without telling us what your, a garbage can't, like if you're taking stuff out of a garbage can, you, it's really important that you say that. If you just find it on the ground underneath a chair and it's wrapped up in a wrapper,

go fucking crazy. Well, it says, but it says, sealed away and kept safe from the surrounding trash. But that, Griffin and I have both done cleaning in a movie theater. The surrounding trash also just describes the floor. Could just be the floor. Yes. Yeah. But like, it's in its wrapper.

Let's, let's assume that this is a garbage, yes. Well, assume it's a garbage can candy bar. Okay. I think that that is, if we're, if we have to go one way or the other, I feel like Occam's razor, this is a garbage can candy bar. Okay. Let's do that. Who's throwing away an unopened candy?

No, no, no. That question is literally in the question. No, I understand that. I'm just saying it's not like a half-eaten bag of popcorn. Yeah, we know, Travis. A candy bar is something, but it's also in the question. But what I'm saying is, you could just put it in your pocket and eat it later. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

It's not a thing. Yeah. They don't stop you. Sure. It's not, there's not customs. Like, yeah, yeah. Like you would use for an unopened bottle of wine, for example. Yes.

Something like that. That one gets me. Hey, listen. Hey guys, step over here. Step over here. Step over here for a second. My whole thing is why buy overpriced concessions. Hey guys.

Just to let it get thrown away. Like, why do that? Hey guys, can I talk to you for a second? Yeah. I know that you're mad at me about Mr. Nickname that I did earlier. I don't know why. I'm a little mad. It was a, it didn't have it.

So why are you fucking putting me on blast? I'm trying to riff. I'm trying to. Yeah. I'm trying to return to the themes of the question like elite motif. That's not riffing. That's harmonizing with the ideas already presented. So of our generation, can I tell you a weird thing that pops in my head when you say this

for some reason, I think. Is it germane? Yeah. Is it just confirm it's germane? For some reason I'm like, what if somebody injected drugs into this candy bar? Yes. And there was a lot of that kind of talk going around early on for sure. And I don't know why my almost 40 year old brain still worries about this.

That someone would think, you know, what's a great, here's a great trap. I'm going to inject drugs into a Trix bar, then throw it into a trash can and then not be there to see if anything ever comes in this. That's interesting Travis. So by that logic, and I'm not saying it's bad logic, I'm kind of a fan, if a garbage can is the safest place to find a candy bar. Yes. Because then who's going to poison a candy bar and then throw it away?

You're saying it's hiding in plain sight. If there was a little like alabaster pedestal with a single wrapped Trix bar on it, that has been placed there. That is a trap. That's a trap. That's a trap. Throwing away. A garbage can though is safe.

Okay. I want to, I don't think there's any problem. I think, I think food waste is a huge problem in this country. I think if you want to eat a Trix bar, if it's been unwrapped and it's been in the trash and you give it a rinse off. Wait, no, if it's still wrapped. If it's still wrapped. If it's still wrapped.

Yes. It's been unwrapped. It's been unwrapped. Interesting. If it's wrapped. That's the word. If it's wrapped, it's fine. I think the trouble you might have though, is if I'm a, if I'm Mr. Big Movies, right?

The guy at the boss of the whole deal. That's what they call Tom Hanks. That's his nickname. And I see one of my employees happily munching on a left Trix or right Trix, whatever. Yeah. I'm going to want to see some documentation to confirm the sale. Absolutely. You're not going to be able to convince me that somebody else earlier gave me money for

that and then threw it in the trash can. Yeah. Occam's razor. Yeah. I've worked huge on that one. Suggests that probably not. Occam's razor. What if there's, what if you're eating a candy bar and inside you find an Occam's razor?

That's dangerous. Occam's always tried to get us, get one over. Yeah. Hey, Justin, good news. Movie theater managers, they don't watch people clean them as long as you finish it before you exit the theater. You got to do it while you're working. You're safe.

You're fine. Okay. They don't check your work. Trust me. We used to have, when I worked at the blockbuster, we have to, we used to have to tape receipts to our fruitopia. It was, it was no joke over there. Well, and it's that kind of cost saving measures.

That's why they're still thriving today, baby. Yeah. I threw away so many cups of dip. Yep. Snuff, snuff. Snooze. I don't, I really snooze. Snooze juice.

Snooze juice into trash cans while working at the movie theater that this may be, you know, a sign of the times. I don't know if people are still, I haven't seen a person dip tobacco in this many years. So I don't know folks. Would you say maybe perhaps you haven't seen a person dip tobacco since just running the math here. You left West Virginia. Yeah.

I was just thinking, I was just thinking the same math, Jamie. Yeah. So that has instilled in me sort of a, maybe a fear of like movie theater garbage cans that's a little bit more elevated than average. Most of the time, grab the Twix, go wild. It is not poisoned. Hey, can we approach the wizard? Yeah, Mr. Magic.

Love that. Please. Let's approach Mr. Magic. That's the name he wants to go by now. That's a SoundCloud. So this is how to create a cool email address. Get this. Send in by Siobhan.

Thanks, Siobhan. Thanks, Siobhan. Starting to think Siobhan maybe owns WikiHow and like knows where all the best shit is. This is how to create a cool email address. Oh, thank you. Perhaps you're making your first email account and you want the name to be as cool as possible. Maybe you're tired of your current email and you want to use something more exciting. At any rate, cool means many things to many people, so you'll need to decide what you

want your email address to say about you. Oh, boy. Consider the different types of cool email. Some emails look cool because they're cool. And unique. Others are cool because they're simple, classy, and professional. Still others find an engaging and original way to express your interest. You'll need to decide what you want your email address to say about you.

No. No. I want all of those at the same time. I would also say WikiHow, if I knew what I wanted my email address to say about me, I wouldn't be searching WikiHow for how to make a cool email address. You're saying, oh, how to make a cool email address? Just make a cool email address. Make a cool one.

Oh, my God. WikiHow. I'm saying we can probably think of the perfect email address in this segment that is cool, kooky, unique, simple, classy, professional, engaging, says a lot about you. Do you want me to pull up the domains that we own? Do you think that could be a helpful tool in, like, plotting the perfect email address? Oh, that's true, Justin. You have introduced that you could add a lot of different domains to it.

Oh, wow. Yeah. That, like, the joke could be, you know, like. Not a joke. This is a professional kooky. Professional. Simple email address. All right.

So I'll tell you, Gmail has gone on an interesting trajectory. Yeah. The Gmail address used to, I feel like, show that you're kind of living free, living wild, doing your own thing, kind of getting silly. Yeah. Now, if I see an email address and it doesn't have Gmail at the end, I don't really trust you. Yeah, sure.

I don't think you, I guess if it's a redirect, that's fine. If it's like a fake thing that goes to a Gmail address, that's fine. But when I see people who are like, at Outlook or at, sometimes guys, I see at Yahoo. It's like, what do I do? That's not, you're not a real person. I'm pretty sure my in-laws still use a Hotmail email account, which makes me think that they are crypto dark web drug dealers on the, on the slide. Yeah.

I would say that Hotmail is like a recognizable off-brand. We're like Kirkland, you know? It's like Kirkland. I have a friend, no Kirkland. I still understand I trust Kirkland, right? Even though it's not necessarily one of the big name brands. Then you get into some, right? I see people, I know a few people guys that still have at AOL.com at the end of their

email addresses. I don't trust them. And I don't mean the email address. I mean, I don't trust the person. That person ain't checking their email. I'm throwing that email into the garbage directly. A kooky email address could be anything from random words to a few of your basic interests. It could be kangaroogirlatexample.com or caffeine.fiend.seventeenatexample.com.

Kangaroogirlatexample.com. I would do anything. I would do anything to have that email address. Just send that email address and email right now saying. Any price. Any price to be, to become you. I'm just saying exampleemailatexample.com would be a great email address to have. That would be strong.

Personality-based address might be something that speaks to some of your interests or values. For example, mellow.chelloatexample.com or becauseit'sthereatexample.com. Wait, I don't know. Because it's there? A more professional address might be something that uses your business in an interesting sounding name. If your name is Billy Bones, you could use bbonesatexample.com. That's just one example.

If your name is Billy Bones. If your name is Billy Bones. Or if your company is bigbones.com or if it's batbones, you only sell batbones. B-Bones works for a lot of different things is what I'm saying. Okay, you get, I'm going to just start saying some email addresses suggested by this Wiki Har article, okay? And you get them in a big batch and they're all busy emails. I think we all realize that's the nug here at this point.

That's the nug. And you tell me which one of these you're going to open up. This is going to be a multiple choice test. Okay, so you get an email address from kangaroogirlatexample.com. You get one from bbonesatexample.com. You get one from calf.arsisatexample.com. Which one of those are you cracking open? B-Bones.

B-Bones for sure. I'm not open on calf.arsis. No, that's no way. Think of a word that sounds interesting before or after your interest. It's catharsis, Justin. I saw your face. It's catharsis, but they threw a dot in the middle. You could just incorporate your love of guitar into your email address.

For instance, you could use guitardude97 or guitarjamsatexample.com. Now, once again, I am opening guitarjams. I am not opening guitardude97. That's a fake. As soon as I see numbers in it nowadays. Yeah, nowadays. I just want to say my email was returned to kangaroo girl.com. They said it doesn't exist.

So I went to example.com. And you know what it is? What? It's just an example. It's just an example website. If you go to example.com, it says this is an example. You shouldn't have come here. This is just an example.

Why did you come here? Ain't nobody supposed to be here. How old is this website? Well, judging by the website, it was put up by some of the first people to ever do websites. This is like the 555555555 of internet. Yeah, you can use this one. If you go to example.com, it's just an example. You're not supposed to really go in there.

Try combining two words to make one. For example, crocodile and rocket can be combined to make the word Betty Crocker. I don't think so. All right. How about Bill Bones? Bill Bones. That's pretty cool. Yeah, it's short for Billy Bones.

Billy Bones. Please. Billy Bones is my son. I'm Bill Bones. Call me Bill Bones. Call me Bill Bones, Swaggums. Please. Mr. Bones is me.

Yeah. I prefer it. Please. Bones is my favorite TV show. Call me Billy. Another good method is to take a word. This is a really fancy carnival. I'm Dr. Bones.

Another good method is to take a word you like, such as laser or turbo, and use it to describe another word, such as laser boulder or turbo candy. The word you're describing can be quite random. All right. Two emails come in. Ting, ting. Laser boulder at example.com, turbo candy at example.com. Which one do you open?

Oh, my God. That's a toughie. I think I'm going to open turbo candy because my brain can make six big leaps to figure out what that's describing. I don't know what a laser boulder is. Is it laser guided? Is it laser powered? No one knows.

No one knows. Try not to make a generic or random address. Avoid abstract numbers or birth years. These are rather common. It may take away from the originality of your address. Again, however, you might consider using more generic style elements if you plan to eventually use this email for professional purposes. So do it, but don't do it.

But do it unless you don't do it. James.Madison.98 at example.com or JoeKSmith at example.com are examples of generic email addresses. On the other hand, they are simple and straightforward. It all comes down to what you think is cool. Yeah. What I think is cool is one that I can say out loud when introducing myself in some sort of business email situation and then not have to immediately follow it up with like an email

like, okay, well, I was. So listen, in order for this to make sense, you have to know I was really, really into incubus in college. Incubus 69. The number is, that is a sex joke. Yeah. That wasn't the year I was born. I don't know if that was clear.

Not the year I was born. 87 personally. Incubus 87 was taken. So I typed in incubus 69 as a joke to see if I could get it. And I did. And now it's my business professional email address. I'm Griffin McElroy, the president of the United States of America. Here's another suggestion.

Don't have an email that you established less than maybe like 15, 16 years ago that is not specific enough to even explain away that much, but more it was just like an empowering thing. Like say you just made it and it was just like Steven rules at gmail.com, something like that, but maybe contains the name Travis and a different word than rules. And then now flash forward to like, that is your most established. That's where everything goes. That's not your business email, but it still is the email that when, for example, like

you take your dog to the veterinarian and the veterinarian's like, where should we send the test results? And you have to say that email out loud. You got to make a like a new email. Oh, but maybe you, for example, have like ADHD and you have a hard enough time remembering to check one email. And then you have to create a business one. And now you're not going to create a third one that you definitely will forget to check.

Yeah. Yeah. And it will haunt you for the rest of your life to have to explain that it's not a reference to something so much as you just thought it sounded cool. Yeah, sure. I don't want to talk about email addresses anymore. Oh, who can blame you? Although I do have some Q and A's that are fun.

Can I have more than one email address? Yes. Yep. Don't let the government find out. How do I get another outlook email name? It's been so long that I can't remember my login information. That's God's way of telling you start over to use outlook. Yeah, start over on a different one.

Is Crazy Bopper a good name? That's one of the Q's? Is Crazy Bopper a good name? Answer. Create a name that describes you or what you like to do. If you are, indeed, a Crazy Bopper, that is a good name. I didn't say that. It doesn't say that.

It does. If you are, indeed, a Crazy Bopper, that is a good name. Cool. 14 people found that answer helpful. 17 did not. I know. 17 were like, neither of those words describe me directly. What am I supposed to do with this?

Yeah, it perfectly fulfills everything that it set out to do. It answers the fuck out of that question. Listen, yes, I'm crazy, but I don't like bobbing. I don't know what to do with this. Can we go now? Yeah, let's go. Speaking of emails and websites and stuff, like if you someday you'll buy example.com and it will not just be an example you use, but rather it will become the new ideal of

what a website can be. It will become the platonic example website because you took that domain and you built that website with Squarespace. That's right. Squarespace. Use it to build the website that all other websites will strive to be because it is all in one platform for building your brand and growing your business online. You can stand out with a beautiful, perfect website, engage with your audience and sell

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Use offer code my brother all one word to save 10% off your first purchase of a website in your domain. Squarespace change the internet for the better today. I mean I could talk about Babel. Yeah do it. I mean you know me I'm always about sort of a big reset for myself and trying to like reinvent myself and make myself better mentally, physically, socially, spiritually. I can't think of a better way to do that than like learning a new language because that

opens the door for a lot of travel opportunities for me that I'm pretty excited about in 2023. Where do you want to travel to Griffin? What's your number one destination top of your mind? Number one destination top of my mind? Yeah. That's mine too bud. You said number one. Yeah man.

Listen there's no judgment here. You can't take it back. And what are you going to do? I guess actually number one? Heaven. Yeah. So I can. That's on the other side of the moon that we can't see though.

Yeah. Yeah. Okay. I'm really excited. They're doing, they're watching Green Mile on Wednesday and I want to kick with Bob Hoskins and just like just sort of like pick his brain. You know what I heard. So Babel, Babel's the Babel's anyway Babel.

In heaven they only speak French. That's true. If you want to get to heaven you have to use Babel. That was the lesson that they learned so long ago when they made their cool tower. Thanks to Babel's fun and easy bite-sized language lessons you're going to feel like you're in heaven by how confident you feel no matter where the new year takes you. Was that a confusing sentence? Yeah.

Maybe a little bit. But if it had been in French it would have sounded beautiful. It was the conjugation and the localization that kind of chewed that one up. But with Babel you only need 10 minutes to complete a lesson. So you can start having real life conversations in a new language in as little as three weeks. You can access podcasts, games, videos, stories, even live classes with Babel plus it comes with a 20 day money back guarantee. You make it, you know, 19 days in you're like actually I'm fine with how I talk now.

No big deal. Right now you can get up to 55% off your subscription when you go to Babel.com slash my brother. That's B-A-B-B-E-L.com slash my brother for up to 55% off your subscription. Babel, language for life. Hey there beautiful people. I am your favorite author, Rastravel Anderson, of We See Each Other, a black trans journey through TV and field.

You know this is supposed to be a promo for our show Fantae and not your book, right? It's called Motetask. I can't with you right now. Trevella and I have an award-winning show called Fantae that we both host and it's a podcast where we dig into the complex and complicated conversations about the gray areas in our lives. Perhaps there is a public figure of some sort and you're like oh that person is so smart and so charming but you're also like oh that person gets on my nerves.

Okay, okay. You can catch us every week right here on MaxFun or wherever you get your slay worthy audio. And you can watch us on the YouTube every Friday. It's Fantae. F-A-N-T-I. Since we reached our highest milestone during the MaxFun drive, we are creating a MaxFun Foley library full of sound effects from your favorite hosts.

The whole MaxFun community will be able to use it. So what would you like it to feature? People high-fiving, walking through mud, chicken clucking, jazz kazoo. Get to MaximumFun.org slash Foley. That's MaximumFun.org slash F-O-L-E-Y and submit your ideas. We are excited to make this silly thing together and even more excited to see what you all create with it. And thank you again for a great MaxFun drive.

Who wants another question? I do. Can you be a little bit more sure? I do. Give it to me. I'm a teenager who sometimes spends their free time listening to podcasts while doing Sudoku puzzles. Hell yeah.

Fuck. Yes. And presumably fending off suitors because that sounds like a cool vibe. I recently bought a new book of them, which said the difficulty went from very easy to very hard while I regularly do what I thought was medium difficulty puzzles in a few minutes. This book put what seems like medium to hard difficulty throughout the book with seemingly no difficulty changes to the point that I got stuck on the first puzzle. This was supposed to replace a book that I already finished, so it's not gonna be terrible

at them. And my mom agrees that the book is mislabeled. The book teaches you how to do them at the beginning, so it's not like it's made for you. Go on. Is this the level of specificity that we are at now? Yes. Tell me where the fucking, tell me if the candy bar's in the garbage can.

This is good. Don't laugh at this. This is good. This is the amount of information we now need in the year 2023 to answer questions correctly. Yes. We have asked for, we begged for context. Yes. The book also teaches you how to do them at the beginning, so it's not like it's made

for people who are already experts at it. Good. The very easy title at the top of each page mocks me each time I open it. What would you do in this situation? That's from Sudoku Sucker. I mean, are you busting out? What kind of strategies are you working with? Yeah.

You're not doing it with a pen. I have to assume you're not doing it with a pen. Right here. I mean, I'm more talking about, are you like coming at it on the X and the Y axis? Are you looking? Do you do the numbers in the corners? That's huge. Are you doing this?

Are you pulling a swordfish? Can I? Don't put 11. Don't listen. Don't put 11 in there. No. No. That's a rookie mistake.

That's a rookie mistake. That's a ABC, the rookie mistake, starring Nathan Villion. No letters too. Thank you, Travis. Yeah. If you start to put letters in the blocks, you need to stop and you need to look at it and realize that that's not how Sudoku works. Have you?

I've had the opposite end of this problem before where I bought a Sudoku book in, you know, maybe I've had a connection flight and I see that book in the Hudson News and I'm like, yeah, let's do it. And then I'm flying through the first 20 and I'm like, I'm a genius. And then I look and I'm like, oh, there's Sudoku for beginner. What was I thinking? Yeah, there's baby Sudoku. There's a baby Sudoku.

Like 10% is all that's left to fill in. Like most of the, they filled in all the ones and through eight and I just had to write nine something. This is nothing. Sydney forgot an activity on a plane that we were on together, which is just to me beyond unfathomable. Yeah. I have a very deep bench of activities.

So I was able to give her an activity to do to kind of, and it was a big, it was a Sudoku app that I had. It was a good Sudoku? Yes. It was a good Sudoku. Good Sudoku is the best app. I play that shit all the time. And then Sydney after the flight, which is about two hours long, says to me like, hey,

you got really good at Sudoku. After that, during that, I was like, Oh, really? And I put my phone out to see like where I was at, and it's just like a big square with like a three in it somewhere. It's like, I don't know, man, fucking go for it. She's like orchestrating it from her mind and give me a headache. Just to look at it. Yeah.

Figure it out. There are some hard Sudoku. Is that when you realized that your wife is smarter than you? Well, no, that she's willing to put the work in. Oh, that's what it was. Okay. So what I'm gonna tell you about Sudoku is that if you're ever doing it and you're like thinking you're crushing it, but then you look and there's like one row that has like

two fives in it, if it's just the one time, it's okay. If you have to break the basic fundamental rules of Sudoku to finish it like once or twice even, it's fine. That's fine. That's okay. So Sudoku is a microcosmic example of like exactly like a representative of my commitment to things, which is like, I'm good at this. I'm nailing it.

I'm doing it. I'm flying through. Wait a minute. This one doesn't match up. I could go back through and spend a lot of time figuring out where I messed up or I could just turn the page and start a new one. Yeah. Just go on.

You made a mistake. I made a mistake. And that's enough to make me not care about this puzzle. I just put 45 minutes into it. It's pretty hard to make Sudoku funny. I'm realizing now because it's basically a math crossword puzzle. Yeah. What about it?

Yeah. It's crossword puzzle with math. What if you called it Pudoku because you did it on a toilet? That's good. Or Sudoku. No, that's still not a joke. Sudoku. Oh, that's better actually.

Let's talk about something else. Let's talk about something else, huh? Yeah. That's not good. I forgot Justin fucking hates Sudoku, I guess. Yeah, man. I play pickleball at my local community center. The entry is $2 a night.

Last week I didn't plan ahead and only had $1.40 in change. I gave what I had thinking it wouldn't be a big deal, but then I overheard the person counting the money next to me asking around who had done this, complaining that someone shorted them 60 cents and that they hated change. I pretended it wasn't me out of panic, but now I'm torn. I was going to give it extra 60 cents next time, but I feel that would anger them more as it would be even more change and look like someone had shorted them again. I could give them extra cash, but that feels over the top for such a simple mistake.

Do I fess up and explain the situation, pay the extra money, that's from in a pickle in Oregon. I mean, it's not a simple mistake. You shorted them 30 percent. Yeah. 30 percent. Now, listen, out of $2, that's not that much, but if you were buying a brand new car and you only paid 70 percent and expected to get away with that, look out because I'm coming

for you. Someone's already only asking $2, which is a wild amount to ask for anything in any regard. This is a person who has really gone through the dollars and cents of the situation. This person said, I know how many people are coming to play, play pickleball. The only, I'm not getting out of bed for less than $2 a person. Yeah. So you're going to give me my full fee. This is my thinking on it, Justin.

Yeah. A nominal amount that is inconvenient enough to create a barrier to people who don't really want to play pickleball, but want to, like, I don't know, goof around or whatever, but not so high that people who do want to play pickleball will be like, well, I can't. I can't justify it. $2 is basically like a qualifying scavenger hunt that you have to do to qualify to come. You have to jump through a few coops, you have to get a ring or a crystal, you know, whatever.

Sure. Right. If you really were going to Danny Ocean this, because let's be honest, like, there's a sick thrill that you're chasing for, like, getting a little something extra, right? We're disgusted, obviously. We're disgusted by your act. Yeah, you're a bad act. Yeah, that's clear.

Right? Okay, you're the worst of the worst. Yeah. If you really wanted to be a sneaky, dirty, fucking thief, then introducing change into the equation at all is, of course, the wrong thing to do. Yes. If Danny Ocean stole the big crystal football from the vault and then left a real tiny football, like a tiny Nerf football in its stead, like a crime has a crime took place here.

So I was thinking, like, is it better if you just give $1, but then whoever counts out the till at the end of the night is going to be there's an odd number. This is something has gone terribly sour. So I guess not paying at all is the best, is the best option in that situation. Oh, I see. Okay, how would you, now, how are we doing that, though? How are we getting away with that? Now, Justin, obviously, there's not a human being taking this money in their hand from

you when you walk in or else the change would have been discovered right away. I'm betting at best, decorative shoebox. Are we thinking, like, honor system? Is that where we're at? I think that's what we're doing here. Yeah. It's got to be. Okay.

I don't know how else they could put change in the boxes. Yeah. I think that would be helpful in the future. Yeah. Um, boy, howdy, $2 is not very much money to play pickleball all night. It seems like. It seems like a really fair price if this is a, yeah, I mean, maybe an unfair price. Maybe next time, walk up, hand them a $5 bill and say, no, you're worth.

Come on, you're providing pickleball services. Value yourself. If you really want to rectify this situation and give extra cash next time without adding more change to the situation, I think you're going to have to give them $3 and eat the extra 40 cents. Yeah. Yeah. And maybe say like, Hey, do you remember like a week ago when somebody only gave a $1.60

or $1.40? Man, that has been eating me up. And you know what? I'm going to fix this right here. Here you go. Yeah. That's for whatever piece of human scum gave you change. And not even good change, not even two quarters, but it sounds like maybe a quarter of a dime

in a nickel. I don't know, man. That's so many different size coins to just have in your pocket or four dimes, which guarantees at least one of them is getting lost in the shuffle because they're so little. Sure. Which coin would you guys eat? Eat? Dime.

I'm not. I'm not hungry, Justin. That's not the question. I'm not hungry for them. I'm asking the question. I'm asking the question. I'm saying which coin makes you hungry. Which coin do you want to eat the most?

Eat the most? Which coin do you want? It's not hard. Which gold dollar coin do you want to eat the most? The gold dollar coins because they remind me of geltz. Yeah. And at the end of the day, at the end of the day, no matter what, if you eat a coin, you're going to have a bad Thursday.

It's going to be not good to have the coin inside you. With a gold dollar, at least when it's done, you have a dollar. Yeah. Do you know what I mean? There's a way to answer this question where it's like, it's all going to be bad. So for me, actually, it's going to be a 1941 Buffalo nickel or whatever that's value is you know, it trades at $16,000 on the, so I actually solved your puzzle the best way possible juice.

I'm going to go with the 19- I mean, a dime would be less, a dime would be less intrusive for the whole situation. But then can you sell it for $16,000 at the big coin conventions? No. Yeah. Absolutely. No, you can't, can you? That's about $16,000.

I'll buy a lot of pickleball, approximately 8,000 pickleball matches, so. You should go in. Oh my God. What if you go in with like $50 in quarters? Whoa. And you're like, this should pickleball everyone for the night, I believe. Oh, that's cool. And you give them like all the quarters.

Is it in rolls at least? Yeah. No. Piles. Baggies with odd numbered. Yeah, $50 of quarters is not, I mean, that's five rolls of course. Like you could hold that in your hand. You understand that, right?

It's not that impressive, right? No. It's also though, Justin, once again, probably a volunteer, maybe a gym employee who's not getting paid enough because they're only charging $2 for a pickleball court and you're like, yeah, really? So this is like when someone's like, I got a parking ticket, so I paid it all in pennies. And I'm like, hey, at no point were those pennies a problem for the person who gave you a parking ticket.

You know that, right? Like you're not paying the pennies to the person who wrote the ticket. Justin, I'm confused as to who this quarter scenario is sticking it to. It's just like, you know, it's kind of like standing up for yourself. To who though? You don't have to stand up to somebody to stand up for yourself. That's something I've been saying a lot lately. But then you're just standing up.

Yeah, but you don't have to stand up to somebody to stand up for yourself. But you see, Justin, how two and four are the opposing words there, right? I'm standing up for me to you. So you get it. Okay. I'm going to say the 1999 Delaware Statehood Quarter Silver PR70 Deep Cameo PCGS. They only made 804,000 of these babies. Hey, traits me, before you go through your coins and sell them off, make sure to look

for one that's been through Griffin's Intestines. That one's going to be worthless. It's going to be worth $17,250. Now Griffin, don't you think the patina is going to be a little bit different on that one? It could be better. The patina has changed slightly. You do not know.

You do not, very good. You do not know what my sort of stuff that I have going on in there would do to the finish on a metal coin. Do you think it would increase like those coffee beans that like, I think it's lemurs eat or something and it comes out and people are like, this is the best? Maybe. Perhaps. But there's a problem with Griffin, once that happens, people are going to be knocking

down your door, coming in and be like, eat my coin. No, eat my coin. I need it. It's not the me passing it through my body that does it, Trav. It's the fact that this is original run state quarter program, 1999 Delaware Statehood Quarter. But you think it's going to go in and come out at the same price? No change.

No fluctuation whatsoever. Travis, Justin asked me what goddamn coin I wanted to eat. Yeah. The coin I want to eat is the 1999 Delaware Statehood Quarter. They only made 804,000 and they trade for $17,250. I have to eat a coin. Wait, they ate 804,000 of them? 804,000.

That's so many. That's a lot. Sounds like it. So many. Sounds like it. They made 350 million Pennsylvania ones. Oh, OK. Wait, hold on.

Yeah. How many did they make? 804,000 Delaware Statehood Quarters, chase for 17250. I'm eating that one. 17250. Yeah. Because half of that. $1,000.

Yeah. 402,000 of those Justin got turned into little cowboy hat shaped quarters. Yeah. So that already made them pretty rare. So what's the price again? What's the price they're trading on? $17,250 for this quarter. Yeah.

I think I'll eat that one. Thank you very much. So that. OK. OK. That is a value of $13 trillion. That cannot be accurate. What you're saying to me cannot be accurate.

Oh, you're saying if you add all those quarters up together, sold them all at once, you're a trillion there. $13 trillion. Justin. That's more than our GDP. What you're saying cannot be accurate. I'm not. Unless someone took 803,000 of them and threw them in a lake.

Or eight of them. Or eight of them. Thank you. This is not some. They can't be 30 trillion dollars in Delaware quarters. This is not some genie's wish where you have said what I'm respecting the boundaries of the question. You said what coin do you want to eat?

I didn't say I want to eat all 804,000 of the Delaware statehood quarters worth approximately 60 trillion. That way, when I shit out these 804,000 quarters, I'll be a literal trillionaire. Because Griffin, can I ask? Can I ask what your metric was your search terms? Because in five seconds, I found the 1894 SPR 66BM barber dime, a dime that's worth $1,997,500. You're kidding me.

You're not listening to what I'm saying. So that's a dime, Griffin. Okay, but that's not. That's an unbelievable. That's a pirate's gold doubloon found at the bottom of that. That's the heart of the ocean. Oh, so you're saying there's an approachability here. There's an approachability to the 1999 Delaware statehood quarter.

There can't be $13 trillion of these quarters anywhere, Griffin. I'm saying something's wrong. No, Justin. There's not. There's $200,000 worth of these quarters. Now let me say this. Griffin, let's compare. For Justin, Justin, to your point, the 1975 PR 68 Roosevelt dime, right?

I only want to talk about coins now, by the way. $2,845,000 and then some proofs produced in San Francisco, right? But two of them came without the S on it, making them worth $456,000. Okay. So, Griffin. That seems good. Travis, you eat one. I'll eat the other one.

No. I need to know how many of Griffin's special quarters had something wrong with them to justify the price tag. I mean, what was wrong with them is that they didn't think that Delaware statehood quarter is going to be the fucking hot item of Christmas. Travis said to me, is there's two coins that are each worth like a million dollars. That makes sense to me. You can't tell me.

What I'm saying to you, I don't care about you eating them. I remember you eating them for the picture. I was saying, you can't tell me. There's $840,000 of these coins rolling around and each one is worth $17,000. Yeah. There's just so many coins out there, guys. This makes the problem worse. If these were the only coins in the world, I could start to get there, maybe.

Right. If this is our only system of storing value, I could understand there being $13 trillion worth of these coins. Yeah, I know. I think we both understand what the other one is saying. I think that Travis's answer was a little bit cheating just because there's no way we're going to get our hands on two of these coins. I feel like I could probably source one of these $17,000 coins, eat it, and then resell

it. It sounds like you could comfortably source hundreds of thousands of them before you even start to. Oh, yeah. They're coin people listening to this right now and they're hearing what you're saying and they're hearing what I'm saying and they're thinking like, maybe I'm wrong about which one is the smart McElroy brother. For me, though, saying that I'm the amnit, that you're the smart one.

That I'm amnit. I can't think of a fight. Wait, up until now, Griffin, which one did they think was that? I guess Justin in this example. Why wasn't it me? And did you notice, Travis? Hey, why did you jump right to Justin? Well, did you notice that he didn't even answer his own question?

Yeah. What coin would you eat, smart guy? What coin would you eat? Funny. Hey, juice. Funny. Oh, it was not a joke. I was not a joke.

I'm saying dimes make me kind of hungry. That's perverted. That's fucked up. I don't want to eat this. Dimes generally. Not a specific dime. Yeah. It's worth a made up amount of money.

I do want to eat Scrooge's number one dime. That would be. Yeah. Well, you could, again, ransom that off. Do you think Scrooge pays income tax? Ooh. Ooh. It doesn't seem like you would, right?

It doesn't seem like you would, does it? I mean, this is a man who won't give away a dime. Yeah. The idea that once a year he sits down and gives the government a big hunk of his money out of the question. Well, I think probably the IRS auditor shows up to his house, like, you have to, and he's like, oh, come on this way. I'm going to swamp.

And then you go into his vault and it's just a big fucking silo filled with coins. And he's like, good luck. Yeah. Figure out how much I've got. They don't talk about this on the show. The first third of that, the bottom third of that stack is all IRS agent bodies that he's buried in. Yeah.

Exactly. Exactly. In Uncle Scrooge Adventures, number 14, Scrooge gained independence from the United States for Killmotor Hill, where I guess he lives. Killmotor Hill? He did secede from the nation. Cool duck. Cool duck.

Didn't know Duckburg was in America. Yeah. It wasn't America, but until it wasn't anymore and it became its own nation that seceded from the U.S. Well, guess what, Scrooge? We're coming for your ass, because guess what, Scrooge? These colors don't run. I don't know what colors you're working with now, Scrooge, but now you woke up the bear.

Now you woke up the bear and we're coming. The Beagle Boys are American heroes trying to collect taxes so that we don't have to we can single-handedly fund single-payer health care in America by just getting Scrooge's hand. Think about how many problems would be solved if we were able to collect tax payments from Scrooge McDuck. Yes. You know who the single-payer is?

Scrooge McDuck. Scrooge McDuck. He's just not doing it. He's a real piece of shit. Hey, thanks so much for listening to our podcast. We hope you have enjoyed yourself. We're going to be Travis San Jose and Denver, right? Have you heard about this?

I haven't heard about this, Justin. Yeah. He shows right. He shows right next week. Yeah, because we're doing Adventure Zone April 27th in San Jose with Abrea Iyengar. We're doing My Brother, My Brother, and Me in San Jose on April 28th and then Denver April 29th. We're doing My Brother, My Brother, and Me.

This was rescheduled, so this is still part of our Fancy Takes Flight tour. It's the last part, but there are still some tickets available if you haven't gotten those yet. Yes. And then the 27 C served the five tour in Columbus, Milwaukee, Raleigh, North Carolina, Richmond, Virginia, San Diego, California. Get those tickets at bit.ly slash McRoy tours. Thank you to Montaigne for the use of our theme song.

My life is better with you. That's the one that I play before all the kids softball games to like really get the team. Yeah. It's fired up. Get them pumped. Get them pumped. Hey, guys.

This is a fun one. Imagine this. Which is better? This is said by Jack Johnson, Surfer Musician, Jack Johnson the Boxer. Let's see. Slow down, everyone. You're moving too fast. That?

Maybe he was trying to box a bunch of people at once. Okay. Hey. Possible. I'm trying to punch you. Hey, slow down. Stop moving. My name is Justin McRoy.

I'm Travis McRoy. I'm Griffin McRoy. This has been My Brother, My Brother, and Me. Kiss Your Dad. Kiss Your Dad. Kiss Your Dad. Kiss Your Dad. Kiss Your Dad.

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