My Brother, My Brother And Me - MBMBaM 657: Face 2 Face: We Stan the Target Tortillas

Episode Date: April 24, 2023

Live from AUSTIN, at the Moontower Comedy Festival, the boys are back on the country roads with advice for Texas about sexy legos, Twisted Gen Z fast food, and bread that is so flat that it's TOO flat. Why is it so flat??Suggested talking points: Another Boy Space, That Good John Tesh History, Frasier Frasier, Joseph Gordon Levitating, Pretzables, No Longer Serving in the War on CreepersTransgender Law Center: https://transgenderlawcenter.org/ 

The McElroy brothers are not experts, and their advice should never be followed. Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it. Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mention only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby? To a precious friendship I could've never seen what was coming for me Hangs at the skate park, hangs by the beach My life

It feels like It's better, it's better with you My life It's better, it's better with you This is true It's better, it's better with you My life It's better with you

Hello everybody, welcome my brother, my brother, and me To an advice show for the Modren Oh yeah, that's too much That's a lot We did three seconds of a sailor dance, and we're winning That's too much I did Billy Blanks' Taibo before too, so that's not... Okay, so if I show it for the Modren air

I'll be lucky if I make it to the future era at this point, any future era And I'm your oldest brother, Justin Tyler McElroy I'm your middleest brother, Travis Patrick McElroy Yeah! Country roads Take me home To the place I belong Texas!

I will, I just want to... Austin, Texas does have the exact number of syllables That you would need Texas! Texas! I'm local boy made good Griffin McElroy, hello We did a sound check, and it didn't occur to me then, like it's occurring to me now The way that these tablecloths are shaped

If you're in that, you're getting a lot The sweet stuff I'm wearing some short shorts Yeah, right now, I'm at like nine and one right now I'm not, yeah, it is not a great split in here I'm gonna have to sit side saddle We are so thrilled to be back in Austin This is one of the first places we ever did a live show

Yes, in an empty barn Yeah, seriously, was anybody here who went to those shows in an empty barn that we set up ourselves and served eggnog? Yes, okay, good That's fantastic It was a lot We didn't know it was gonna be like that when we ran today Yeah, sorry about all that We were just as surprised as you were

Yeah, so what you can imagine after that what a thrill it is to be here at ACL live We get our own bathrooms at this time No problem And our friend Justin doesn't have to do the lights Yeah, which is cool So we were so happy to be here And we are really thrilled and honored to be part of Moontow Just for last comedy festival

I did walk past on my way here They had a big poster of all the names of all the people that are performing in it And they were ranked by, I guess, bigness Yeah Or goodness Or virility Something Probably not virility, Jeff

And it took I'm not sure how you'd measure that Well, there is a way A median virility between the three of us So I'm embarrassed to say Yes I'm embarrassed to say I start staring at this poster Doing a little math

That guy was on SNL and he's lower than we are That's pretty good Were there any surprises, Justin? I don't recognize a lot of the names, but I'm 42 So that's probably a mark in their plus column And then as I'm staring at the poster So it opens the door to the theater that the poster's on And says, are you Justin McAroy?

Whoa And what's interesting, then the poster updated And we dropped down We dropped down the bar rankings And she visually said yes, I was And they said they were coming to the show So I don't know if they're here, can you yell? All right, hey, it's good to see you again

Thanks, Trinnaut One thing, yeah, speaking of the promotion here Go on Y'all seen some of the posters they have for the acts? Yeah, the banners The banners are cool And of course, me and me, I'm looking around Where's our banner?

Where's our banner? And I was thrilled when I found it And this is my favorite image That humanity has ever produced something Okay, you're not overselling it, don't worry We have, let's see, Griffin 36 So let's say for 36 years, our parents have been attempting To somehow counter, like, the three brothers together

That perfect family photo And I think this is it I think we finally got it So, at first glance At first glance, you're probably like, what's the problem? That's the three, that's the three That's the three guys from the show What's the problem?

But man, alive in my small, huh, gang? So what it is, what I'm looking at here? Travis is looking at his secret brother, Griffin Who is looking at his secret brother, Travis And I'm looking down, hoping there's a secret smaller brother Yeah, sure But it's not, but he's not It's the equivalent of the Mulaney joke

About writing Happy Birthday on a sign Is they started with me and Griffin And they're like, oh, no! We got to get Justin on there, too We got a boy's face Yeah, because I just want to say If I'm walking down the streets of Austin, Texas I don't have anything to do in the evening of April 13th

And I see this fucking banner Nothing could stop me from going to that show Like you have obviously surmised At this point, it's an advice show And we're going to help you with all your problems Here's the first problem My dad and I are going to Colorado For a concert this summer

I know he enjoyed smoking that good green stuff In his college days, as did I Since it's legal there, parental disapproval Would hopefully be at a minimum How could I broach this subject And have a chill smoke session with my dad That minimizes awkwardness and maximizes fun That's from Herbal Enthusiasts in San Antonio

Are you here? Okay, so thank you Here is some additional info The concert is at Red Rocks The head and the heart is the band performing Sounds cool I like both of those things I need them to live

Not Red Rocks I just assume when you go to a show at Red Rocks One of the members of Widespread Panic Is there to just blow weed in your face When they punch your ticket It's not to use instead of a hand dryer It's just you wash your hands And then the guy from Widespread Panic

Just shotguns your hands He sings, row row row your boat two times So that you know you've done it long enough And then just What if your dad Is it A fun Yes

What if you're like, oh yeah He gets high and then he's like I don't know where I'm freaking at I'm like, aw man I can remember why I love this I feel so alive right now Ah beans I don't know dad

I'm gonna go fight the head You take the heart Let's go It's an opener Semisonic I'll fight them too Yeah It's closing time for your asses

I'm only afraid of full sonics It depends on what sort of relationship You have with your father already I don't know that I would trust Our dad with that stuff You could end the sentence So many different ways I'm just saying

I've talked to the man I've talked to that gentleman On ambient enough times to know that If he's not operating at 100% I mean you all If you've listened to one of our other products That our dad is on You know that's him at 100%

So I would say on a I would say he waved by By the 100% back in the mid 90s Or get him at like a permanent 90% Too much Coke Zero Too much Coke Zero They changed the Diet Coke formula

And so did our dad That's who we lost him He's fine He's fine Don't worry about it Don't worry about it He's sexed so many times Since we've been here

Just hoping we travel safe Telling us to have a good show Okay, but here's the thing I'm gonna put my dad on blast It's like a No The text he sent us was Guys, please travel safe

And I don't know How to deal with that emphasis Like, okay Yeah man Yeah I was gonna I was gonna But like what do you know

Planes are so shitty these days Make sure you inspect it Before you get on Please God For once I don't I don't feel like we've helped

Very much so far You know Maybe can you get your hands On an edible Cause that might start Like at that point It may start to blur the lines Of whether or not

You're high or not Oh that's fun You'll ease into it With your dad Naturally like Are you feeling it dad I'm like I think I am feeling it son

Yeah But you're like Halfway across the room And he's whispering He's like okay It is a nice change though It's a circle of life That now you're providing

The orange slices and cheese You know what I mean Yeah That's nice John Tash played Red Rocks Right Statistically yes Yeah

That was his big He's just got Wait that way Sorry that was his big What That was his big foray Was playing Red Rocks Was like that tape special

They showed on PBS Fuck yeah Live at Red Rock This is that good John Tash history You come to My brother My brother

Me show for See it all goes back To the three tenors guys I believe Pull up slide 138 please We We'll skip his

Boyhood and then tuck it We went to see The Dungeons and Dragons Movie Today Very good Very good Very good

Very good Flick Had a great time Except for the first Half of it Because I looked over just As we sat down Just out of curiosity

I was like Hey did you guys bring Any weed with you from Cincinnati Ohio And Justin said Why yes I did And he

Very discreetly Showed me the thing I was like Oh cool I had a very discreet Just little And then The cast of the movie

Came out on screen And they were like We are the heroes Of this film But you guys are The real heroes The movie heroes That did happen

Because you're the ones Who here Are making the movie special You're Seeing movies like They're meant to be seen In a theater You're the real heroes

Now don't fucking talk And I looked over At the two of my brothers Like Is this You guys are seeing This too right And then they played

The don't talk Or a fucking kill you Screen that they show At Alamo Draft House Which hits A little bit different When You're smoking

Your brother's Magic Magic West Virginia We that he has For some reason I had a glass of water And a chicken salad Glock coma

You know that It's At the movie Started right after They were like Don't fucking talk Or we'll kill you Justin was like

Mm-hmm Great Great Show title Justin Leeds Over To Me And says Dungeons and Dragons

Which one are you Rooting for The best fucking movie I've ever seen In my life The best fucking movie I've ever seen In my life

It was good though I went to the bathroom Eight times during it This is why I only drink alcohol Cause that's my anti-drug Sure, thanks trap Alright, so I've brought

A segment Okay I've brought a segment To the live show That we've never done Live before But we have done before And this segment

Is called With Special Guest Here's how this works Folks I'm going to tell Justin and Griffin The host of the episode Of Saturday Night Live

And the musical guest That they are introducing Okay And Justin and Griffin Are going to try to nail The vibe of the introduction Great Are we ready?

The first one Coming out swinging Samuel L. Jackson Introducing Ben Folds 5 Okay Not yet Paul Not yet

I'm going to say Overabundant excitement I remember this with perfect clarity Because I was very into Ben Folds 5 And I was hoping Of all the songs That they would play

Something other than Brick And yeah Yeah, Brick it was My friends Can I tell you I also remember the episode And in my memory They played it twice

Brick followed by And they're like One more Yeah, I think So romantic If memory serves Absolute professionalism Perfect level of excitement

From Samuel L. Let's play the video Ladies and gentlemen Ben Folds 5 Now my favorite thing About that introduction Inscrutable Inscrutable

The emphasis on 5 Though makes me very happy He looks pissed off At Ben Folds 5 right now For only having 3 members 5 5 I guess

We get it Ben Okay, next one You ready? Yes David Hyde Pierce Wait, who won? Oh, I would say Justin

I'll give that one to you David Hyde Pierce AKA Niles Frazier Niles Frazier Niles Frazier Like Frazier is Frazier Frazier For Mario Introducing the band

Live Okay If you don't know They did Lightning Crashes And I alone love you That's live Okay

That was a good live I really enjoyed them Yeah, that was really good I'm gonna go This is maybe just hopeful Wishing But I think he's gonna say live Oh, shit

Oh, shit I'm gonna say Justin's answer Just because I want to wish it to be true Okay, play of the video, Paul Ladies and gentlemen Live He wants He said that

Like he got kicked out of live Like they weren't going anywhere And he's like, I'm going to try acting And I'm not playing the zither for you anymore And then they got big Can I see it again, Paul? We don't have that technology It's amazing how perfectly framed his face remains

Ladies and gentlemen, live I guess I think he probably went to clap But he kind of shrugged and it would have fit I don't know, man Live Okay Paul Rudd

Okay Introducing Paul McCartney Oh, my God I think he does an accent I think he does a Beatles impression Oh, no, not my friend Paul You think Paul Rudd does a Beatles impression But you really think that

He's played Beatles in the movie That's true before I think it's like I can't believe I'm here I can't believe I'm the guy from Clueless And I'm saying Paul McCartney Hey Paul Play that Paul Paul clip

Ladies and gentlemen, Paul McCartney What a stinker Nailed it Justin nailed it I feel like I was 100% off Yes I don't think he was right at all Paul, you know I'm going to need it again, pal

I think I was 100% off I think the end when he's like Paul McCartney Paul's going to be like There is no reverence here This is a stinker This seems like he's introducing his nephew Paul McCartney

Oh, okay Ladies and gentlemen, Paul McCartney Right? It's like his nephew Paul McCartney Now seeing it through your eyes It's like he's got another Paul I told him he could do one song I think it's great though

I think he puts the emphasis on McCartney So like, don't be confused I'm Rudd I'm a different Paul I'm a different Paul Okay Joseph Gordon Leavitt How many of these are there just for my own

edification? Fantastic Joseph Gordon Leavitt Introducing Dave Matthews Holy shit He's six inches off the ground Levitating I'm going to say this

Joseph Gordon Levitating He's Joseph Gordon Levitating Yeah I'm going to say I'm going to say he I don't know about tone or anything like that I think he leaves a full pregnant pause between the ladies and gentlemen

and then Dave Matthews Like enough room for him to think The honorable Dave Matthews The honorable, the most venerated My real dad Okay, Paul play the clip Ladies and gentlemen, Dave Matthews Bay Come on now

Joseph Joseph Hit pause, Joe Can we play it one more time? Are we going to get something else out of it? He scared me last time He doesn't have anything to go to the tank Ladies and gentlemen, Dave Matthews Bay

Maybe they were late And they forgot to do like Hey, 15 minutes Dave and company So Joseph was like I got to get these guys to fuck out of here I got to get them out Let's clap for him loud enough Like Tigger Bell

Oh, they're not coming out everybody Come on, let's show we really Oh my god, Dave, Dave, Dave, Dave He peeks his head Go, go, go, go No, too loud You scared him Okay, I got one more

This is the best one Good Johnny Cash introducing Elton John Jesus Christ I know When can you give me a year? Because this is going to change my answer Pretty dramatically

If I had to guess I mean, it looks like eighties, Paul What'd you say? Yeah, I'd say early mid eighties Okay Just really happy Like really upbeat Just super gized

I think I just kind of Kind of L.A.J. Kind of like moroseful Sad Oh, okay, let's play it Working with our special guest Working with our special guest Has been a big thrill for me

He's a wonderful entertainer And you can't work with a guy like Elton John Without having his showmanship and flash rub off on you So Elton, I hope you don't mind But I took the liberty Of borrowing these threads And ladies and gentlemen Once again, Elton John

Now, what I think you're watching there For those of you at home Johnny Cash is wearing an Elton John-esque Like huge, flashy, gold lameille Pink boa outfit And it's a long clip And what I think you're seeing there Is a man who at the beginning of the bid

Is like, this is great This is great shit They're gonna hit this up They're gonna love this And then about halfway through this 22nd bid He's like, I've made a huge mistake He's literally the fucking I think you should leave

I got too much shit on Why did you guys tell me to do this? I got so much shit on Look at me I'm Johnny Cash Look at me right now That's exactly the arc He goes from

They're about to laugh at this so hard I'm not even gonna be able to get the words out to Oh Christ Oh Christ I don't even want to be around anymore I heard my soul I was about to ask for it again I don't think I could actually

I don't actually want to No, I don't think I could get through it Thank you Travis Thank you for your contribution You're welcome Special guest I am planning my upcoming move From Austin to Washington DC

I'm excited for the move Except for... That was acceptable noise for that Yeah, they're leaving you behind I fear leaving behind my beloved Texas grocery store chain Because they make the delicious Fresh tortillas

Target Target? I gotta say we got a few target heads in the audience We love this place here We have no choice but to stand We have no choice but to stand the target tortillas They're so good The tortillas

That's what we call them That's right Travis I'm above the blogs I want to stockpile as many of these Sweet sweet tortillas as I possibly can And bring them with me to put in my freezer The problem is Well, transport I would guess

That's not addressed here But that's definitely an issue The problem is I'm worried that if I show up And try to buy every tortilla in the store The staff will get mad at me For buying too many What's the maximum number of tortillas

That I can buy without drawing too much heat From the store How many do they have? Minus one Now wait Yeah, I mean it's embarrassing For me every time I have dinner with

Dr. Anthony Fauci and his wonderful family Because you live in D.C. now? I live in Washington D.C. Now the district as we call it Fauci Central And when I'm having a dinner with Fauci And his wonderful beautiful family And he's like

It's taco time And I'm like yes sir doctor And then I have to hand him A loose pile of seasoned beef And Lettuce and shredded cheese In his hands And then

He still makes you wash your hands though, right? I've told you this He does not give a shit about that Oh right I've tried going to D.C. grocery stores And I'm like I tell them what it is And they're like

Bullshit They have tortillas? I showed them a picture of it on my phone They're like that's too flat Do they have like Pitas? No They don't

No Travis they don't What about naan? Yeah they have You're having a lot of fun with you In the space right now Travis I'm having so much fun Playing with you right now In the little playground I just built

I had a playground built Where I was feeding Dr. Anthony Fauci loose taco beef In my hands And you're like Uh Wait a second I just thought of something

Yeah Crapes That's why I left That's why you left Because of you Wait left where Listen they do have tortillas in D.C. You'll be happy to hear

They're not as They're not as good As the target ones As the target ones that they have here Cause also like You can also get like You know a nice sweater Or something from the

A big ice A big icy A big icy Sometimes they have Starbucks right there Right there can't beat it They've put the cup holders Guys In the shopping carts

So you can have like Your mocha right there with you I've never been to an H.E.B. Where they didn't have Just a wheelbarrow Constantly moving From where they were selling the tortillas To the back room

Where I'm assuming They were being produced A thousand at a time You buy them in packages Of I think starting at 60 If I'm not mistaken I don't know I ever finished One of those bad boys

And do they Is it like a bakery Where they stop selling When they've made them all Or like they've sold them all We're done I don't know that it's possible I think that they have some sort of

Like quantum universe technology Where they're getting tortillas From every possible Austin Like the shrimp vortex That opens at Red Lobster one day Exactly like the shrimp vortex That opens at Red Lobster every day Maybe you're doing them a favor

By buying all of them Like thank god Thank you We were literally swimming in the back here We've lost a lot of good employees To the tortilla stacks They fall over once a day Damn I might hit up H-E-B

On my way home actually Hey Like Get some of their cereal too Because they got some of the best cereal The past couple of years They're like exclusive H-E-B cereal Sure

Thanks I can get, I can Venmo you Yeah We don't live together They'll send it If this person can get frozen tortillas Back to DC You can mail me a box of mango crunch

Or whatever you find Over the last year or so I treated myself to a frankly Irresponsibly expensive premium Brand of Midwestern milk Why are you talking like that? Why was that like a Catholic dirge? Milk Texas

It comes in a half gallon glass bottles That you can then return to the store And they'll give you a bit of money back I've justified this opulent luxury By telling myself it's not so crazy expensive If I factor in the bottle return Except I've been lazy and so far Have not returned any of the bottles

And now have an impressive collection Of empty milk bottles How can I return them all at once So I don't have to deal with them Without coming off as some lactose obsessed freak Now this next sentence is the kind of detail We're striving for on the show Thank you

If I put two in my bag They clink so loudly And it draws a lot of unwanted attention That's just two folks Now you can imagine Now you can understand why this is such a big problem Who's that from? David

Dave One more detail I do need when you say an impressive amount A collection How many? Roughly Like 20 Like 20 empty bottles of milk

20 empty bottles of milk What you just created for yourself, David Is like a full day Right? That's like Just getting them out to the car Then getting them out of the car Getting them in the building

Sacking them up You've... Oh, no You don't have a car Dave, no Hey, Dave How good a juggler are you, David? If two in your bag clink

Times that by ten I only know You'll hear you coming from the next time over I was sitting here worrying that maybe David Like, with milk bottles like that You have to clean them so good Yeah

Or else they'll be stinky I'm sitting here wondering Man, I wonder if David really worked hard And cleaned those bottles But the only thing I know about David Is that David has never returned One of these milk bottles to the store Which doesn't speak well

Of the tenacity of a David I feel like... Especially when you consider the cleaning part He would have been doing for free Yeah The returning He has incentive Yeah

For sure Oh, Dave Oh, David Oh, Dave Wait long enough And maybe some authorities will come collect them David, have you considered starting some sort of I don't know

Amateur carnival game In your front yard Oh, that's good Knock these over And they're yours Communities love one thing It's a DIY carnival That's great

Set up a folding table In front of your house Stack up these bottles Nine at a time And start handing out strangers baseballs On the streets And when they throw the baseball at the bottles And shatter them

You say, why did you do that? Those are glass bottles I'm gonna return that for money, maybe Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait Here's what you do You do ring toss And then if they sink it You're like, congratulations

Please take your bottle Take your bottle Take it all the way to the grocery store, please Thank you Oh, write a bunch of notes Yeah Stick them inside Throw them in the ocean

Great That's funny No, okay, but Specifically, I think David has to profit Because that's how David has been Justifying this expensive milk Exorbitant milk Hey, David, isn't that much better, though?

What's different? Is it thicker? You can't go back Okay You could, though, right? Probably It's milk Sorry, David, when you say you can't go back

Hey, tell me a second You can't go back to regular milk Not, I've bought so much Not right there in the bottles I can't go back Because at this point, Dave 20 bottles in They know here

They do Yeah You're a regular What's he doing with the bottle? You're drinking a lot of milk I don't actually know how regular You are in this exact moment There's someone at that store that's like

Guys, you're gonna kill me But I do think we need to buy more bottles again I know I know, I know It's ridiculous Because of the trade back in for money Deal we've got going, which is still good But we're 20 short

I'm running inventory We're 20 short on these beautiful bottles And I've asked everyone, except Dave Everyone And most people will grab them back So where's 19 of the other bottles? Because Dave's got one Where are the other 19?

Dave, at the outside, David has three I mean, whoa, hey Dave is our store We trust him He's a regular here A trusted face There's no The problem is

There's just no system for bringing things to the store We have lots of systems for bringing things From store to house Sure But when I'm headed to store I don't think like Let me hit my bottles real quick See what I gotta need to take with me

There was a very recently We bought some strawberries Brought them home, opened it The top layer, very nice But like a prank Underneath all the other strawberries, bad And my wife said In what way?

They'd gone They'd gone Okay They'd spoiled And my wife said Should we return them? And I Can't beat that person

I was like I'm never gonna do that We ate the top ones It was the idea of like It was like $3 So the box of the idea of being like I can't believe it Can we have the top ones

From another box of strawberries On top of the top ones Of this box of strawberries, please I'm never gonna take something back into the store You're never gonna do this, right, David? You sent this in for a fun time For the polycast It's time to turn it

You can turn it into a craft Maybe make your own Christmas decorations Like that That's something to do with garbage You could... You could... I mean, you could YouTube it Just YouTube it

Act like it's a thing Like, hey I'm gonna return all the bottles I could fit in this square Hey, guys I'm doing the milk bottle challenge You all have been begging for it Now I'm doing it

What's up, Periscope? It's me, David What's up, Vine? It's David Doing the milk bottle challenge I'm never giving you up I've pirated my own Vine Just...

You don't even need to film it Just talk like that They're not gonna question you No Yeah, act like there's a camera with you Keep pointing there like Hey, say hi, everybody I'll tell you what, though

One thing I won't... He's had too much of the premium milk Wait, hold on David Is there any chance That you've been buying this milk at HEB? Let's say yes Um...

Because I think what we need Is these two to work together Oh, okay Because they can't be mad at two people At the same time Right? So David is like weird bottle pervert Someone in like, hey, everybody

Clink, clink, clink That's when you're like, tortillas For me, all you got Put them in the bag Nice and fast Please Hey, can you believe this guy? Oh, I'm paying for him

Yeah, all of them Yeah, I'm paying for him I know how I said it And it sounded like a holdup I heard myself saying it But check out those guys' bottles Right? Yeah

You best friends? You best friends? What are the fucking odds? Do this heist! All right, everybody We're gonna take a break Go buy some posters We'll be right back

We'll be right back Bye Hey, Justin Yeah You know how you're always at a loss Of where to find a doctor? No She's...

You're like How do I find a doctor, especially like That takes my insurance Or that are available when I need them That kind of thing, you know? Yeah, my wife's a doctor So I just see her She's not allowed to

But does your wife take your insurance, Justin? I beg her to But she just refuses But I understand Not everybody has a doctor that lives At their house And has to listen to all their problems Yeah, that's true

And not... That's first advice That's like playing a... Yeah, try to marry a doctor if you can Or get a doctor roomie That's fine, too What about plan B, Travis? Plan B is ZocDoc, Justin

Because ZocDoc is the only free app That lets you find and book doctors Who are patient-reviewed, take your insurance And are available when you need them Millions of people use ZocDoc's free app To find and book a doctor in their neighborhood Who is patient-reviewed And fits their needs and schedule just right

You can book an appointment with a few taps in the app Tap in the app, Justin A little app tap Tap in the app You know, Travis, this is a real problem Accessibility is sometimes a big barrier For people looking to seek care For whatever kind of condition

Yes And I think it's cool that ZocDoc Is making that a little bit easier It is Hey, Justin, it's wonderful This might be our most adliest ad in a while I'm really proud of it I'm finding the urge to...

Is Griffin been derailing us this whole time? Yeah, it's been Griffin's fault Yeah, man It's been Griffin's fault We're good ad guys Yeah, we're very professional We're good ad guys We're good ad guys

And he's a bad ad guy Check this out Go to ZocDoc.com Slash my brother And download the ZocDoc app for free Then find and book a top rated doctor today Many are available within 24 hours That's Z-O-C-D-O-C dot com

Slash my brother ZocDoc.com Slash my brother Whew, I got chills, Justin That was amazing It's good, right? Yeah, man I'm looking at it

I'm looking at it Back to the show Hey, before you go Come back, come back, come back Okay, okay No, not you, Justin Like the list Don't worry about it

This week April 27th We're in San Jose Doing adventure zone with the Brea Iron Guard April 28th We're in San Jose Doing my brother and my brother and me April 29th

We're in Denver Doing my brother and my brother and me This is a fancy takes flight set The final The final fancy takes flight set The conclusion of this tour If you don't have your tickets yet You can still get a few

You can go to bit.ly slash macaroytours We'll see you there It's going to be super fun And don't forget to go check out our merch 10% of all merch proceeds this month Go to the Transgender Law Center There's a lot of stuff on there Including the Richard Stank Room Spray

So check it out MacRoymerch.com Hi, I'm Jackie Cation Hello, I'm Lori King-Murton We do a podcast called the Jackie and Lori Show And you could listen to it anytime you want it Because there's hundreds of episodes Yeah, I mean, we've been doing comedy forever

And we should both quit So why don't you listen to it Before we leave this Not only terrible business, but this awful world And find out why we can't Because we love it so Jackie and Lori Show Every week, you're on MaximumFun.org

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I want to Munch Welcome to MunchQuartz Podcast Within a podcast It's profiling the latest and greatest in brand eating. I am your host, Justin McElroy. Okay. And I'm your co-host, Travis McElroy.

Are you guys, are you, hey, let me turn, no, this has gone badly before. I'm just turning the chair around. We don't all have peekaboo crotch windows like you do, Travis. I want to, I'm just saying that Justin, your body posture now is making love to that chair. I've now extended my legs split to eight o'clock and one o'clock. I'm not loving it. Hey, listen, I want to, the reason I'm turning around like this, because I want to talk to the fucking Gen Z people.

Are you here? Okay. Well, obviously I have been chosen to bring this news to you for reasons that you can surmise. Wetzel pretzels is launching a new concept built for you. Wait, now hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on. They're launching a pretzel concept for Gen Z. Like Gen Z, hey, we get it.

That old pretzel, that's not for you. Gen Z people right now, the moment I said pretzels, you could see like, disgusting. We don't crave pretzels. Well, get ready because wetzel pretzels is coming for that ass. That's what it says. That's what it says. It's right there at the top of the page with the ability to unlock a powerful new pathway for expansion.

That's a quote. Holy shit. With the ability to quote unlock a powerful new pathway for expansion, wetzels, pretzels lifted the lid off a new storefront concept Wednesday called Twisting by Wetzel. Twisting by Wetzels. The chain referred to it as a street concept. What's that mean? A street concept.

Holy shit. A satisfy millennial and Gen Z tastes through an expansive, innovative menu curated to provide an array of imaginative and elevated options. You are going to fucking freak when you see this place. Gen Z, are you ready to nut? Paul. That's what it says right there. It says right here in the Brezorleys.

It says. Paul, send them, bud. It's time to bust Gen Z. Here we go. Whoa. Whoa. You're telling me they sell pretzels here? Yeah.

No way, man. Look at the paint splatter design on that table. They must sell cool drugs. Wait, are those yellow chairs? Get out. Are those 18 different drink machines with six of the same drinks in them? Yeah. Because it's twisted.

It's mostly lemonade. We're looking for growth opportunities. Too late, John. They just left the door. Sorry, John. All the Gen Z people left because they since you were a cop, but let's move on. We're always looking for growth opportunities for new and existing franchisees to evolve with whistles.

Says John Fisher. It's definitely not a cop, it says here. Says John Fisher. 18-year-old? He said it in a statement. It says here, to make clear he didn't say this with his mouth. We've shown our ability to adapt to a variety of flexible formats, which sounds suspiciously like your grandpa telling you he's just fine with the person you're dating now, no matter

what grandma might say. We've shown our ability to adapt to a variety of flexible formats, adding storefront locations to our portfolio allows us to bring pretzels to the people, wherever they are. How are they getting pretzels to people before that? It's about it, Travis. It's about accessibility. No, I'm sorry, Justin. I understand that, but did Wetzels not have stores before this?

No, this is the first time they've come out. And you didn't know about that, which is a real credit to your hipness. If you had ever heard about Wetzels before, I would assume you're a cop, but since you're ignorant of them, you're cool and young. Listen, until now, we've just been a fake brand that people could talk about because the word's wrong. And what we decided to do was build stores and sold real pretzels. Or like a ghost kitchen operating out of an ante-ance.

Twisted by Wetzels would debut spring in Orange County, California. Darn. That is one of the coolest places. Whoa! Look at the outside of that place. This is twisted in the W's appraisal. I want to... Well, Justin, one of the W's is a pretzel.

They didn't have the commitment to make both W's pretzels. The interiors are bright. But they did set... I'm so upset that they said, we'll make this one a pretzel. Well, should we obscure it? No. Right below it. Same color.

Same color. Different font. Listen, listen. These interiors are bright with open kitchens to showcase Wetzel's preparation of pretzels. It's not fucking Giro Dreams of Sushi. They take the dough log and they go like this to it. Okay, wait a minute. Hey, shout out.

If you've ever actually done that, is Griffin going to get it right his first try? I've... Hey. Most certainly not. I've made pretzels before, after like the third one, you get how to twist them up right. So, they're not making them fresh as ordered. Yes, they are. But guarantee they're making them by hand there every single day.

Every single day. This is twisted. It's fucked up. That's fair. Can I say that the color scheme does make me think that they're thinking about toddlers when they say Gen Z, where they're like, these kids love high contrast colors, simple shapes, train noises. Okay.

When mommy doesn't leave the room. And we've got Coca-Cola on the screen, 20 more seven. These interiors are bright with open kitchens to showcase Wetzel's preparation and ideally suited for power shopping centers in densely populated, urban, suburban and college town settings. It's twisted by Wetzel's seems like really twisted like they have a supervillain running it. We're talking at the highest density area.

More people means more pretzels. What do we mean? More pain? They shot viral in strain of salty breads. Now they decided just this is Kim Freer at the CMO over there. Just the size of the fucking blackout in the booth. Twisted by Wetzel's embraces the magic or our core brand and elevates it to a whole new level, providing bigger, bolder, more imaginative expression of Wetzel's.

What is that? Set yourself free, Wetzel's. You need to be bigger. Here. Live out loud, Wetzel's. We sell a mouth spray that reminds you of pretzels. Twisted. Wait, Kim's not done.

Building upon our legacy yet stuffing it in the trash before your daughter's friends come over. Our legacy, we're imagining how and where these twisty treats are enjoyed, said Kim Freer, who just didn't want to say the word pretzels again. Run out of ways to say pretzels. Hey, hey, Doug. Will you prove through this for me? Am I?

Yeah, you're saying pretzels. You said pretzels way too much. I knew it. I knew it. It felt like I was saying by bringing an innovative menu and engaging in in-store experience to neighborhood locations, we're making pretzels more fun and accessible than ever before. Sorry, does the press release say pretzels or did you?

No, we're making pretzels more fun and more accessible. I'm just saying, if they changed the name of it to Wetzel's Pretzels, I would eat only there for the rest of my life. Have you? Hey, by and large, is anybody having problems to this point with pretzel access? Because it seems like they're kind of all over right now. Sure. Can I tell you?

The scariest part of this whole press release so far has been them just casually dropping in-store experience. Are people like singing? Is there stuff happening? It's like a party 24-7. Sure. They don't want that when I buy a pretzel. If anything, slow down.

I want less time spent in the pretzel shop. If they could throw it to me, it's like, walk by, that's the ideal, yeah, that's ideal for me. We're proud to debut this new concept in our home state of California, bringing our vision of a wet coast wonderland to life. How could you? They do, if you're curious, there's like a bunch of different things here at the store. There's twists, and that's twisted and braided pretzel.

That's so, I don't know what I'm looking at right now. It's so big. It looks like someone has dipped an entire hot pocket in marinara. This actually, this seems like a threat. It does. If somebody sent me this, no context, no language, I'd be like, we need to go. We need to go now. Big enough for you, Chinzi.

What other food pics do we have, Paul? Let's see. I'll tell you what. Okay. This is the dogs with a Z. Options include the Baja boardwalk, complete with jalapenos, green onion slaw, and an almost complete bun. Authentic cilantro Baja sauce. Folks, in Austin, you guys have got to try cilantro if you haven't.

Get to Wetzel's, twisted by Wetzel's, and you're going to love this stuff. Most of you will. I don't even know what that is. Some of you will not get what all the fuss is about. Do they have any wet food? These are loaded, these are loaded bits with a Z, and it's Wetzel's riff on loaded fries. Cool. Yeah.

No, you fucked up. That's nothing like that. Here's, here's, here's loaded bits have three options, s'mores, bacon ranch, and Baja elote. Like, how is that the three different all over the place? Yeah, just, actually, could you just smooch one all together for me? Thank you. Thank you very much.

And of course, the fourth option, leavens, leavens, Wetzel's compass of quote, bringing pretzels to the people, wherever they are, as Fisher puts it, is something the brand amplified in recent years, with its extensive work with FEMA. The fuck are we looking at, Wetzel's? Wait, no, hold on. No, I made that up. That's a joke. Oh, God.

That's a twisted, sorry, that's a pretzel, this is, it's a pretzel, it's a pretzel chimney cake. A pretzel chimney cake. The brand's pretzel, the brand's pretzel dough, rhoda and cedar, sugar crystals. Hey, Jonathan, are you okay? Take a second, man. It's a pretzel chimney cakes. The brand's pretzel dough, rolled in sugar crystals and filled with soft surf.

This is the cookies and cream variety. Can I say what this image conveys is that the Oreo on top has defeated all its competitors in battle. Their bodies strewn about the ground, to reign supreme. So congratulations to Twisted by Wetzel's Harry Barclay. In the game of cones, you win, you win. Quite a cone, you made. Thank you very much, Wetzel's.

Thank you so much, Wetzel's. Thanks for listening to this episode of the Munch Barclay. We're going to bring some folks down to the microphone. I'm going to call you, as you come down, before we get started, I just want to say we have a lovely poster out there designed by Chloe Dungay that we are huge fans of. We signed a bunch of them, so if there are any still out there after the show, you should grab one. The totally rad.

And grab them and pay for them. Pay for them, yes. Thank you, Travis. When you come to the microphone, if you want to tell us your name, your pronouns if you want to, and a brief summary of your question, and then we'll have a lot of fun. Hello. Howdy. Hi, how's it going?

Are you ready to have fucking fun? I'm ready to have so much fucking fun. Great. Cool. Yeah, I'm Caden. Hi, Caden. Cool. I've been in this place for about a year now, and I used to have eight other co-workers,

and my boss. You ate them? Yeah, and then I got rid of them. Tom or Caden. Yeah. And my boss, every time the McRib would come back in action, he would forcibly buy all of us McRibs. That's the only time he's ever really bought us lunch.

And so he would be visibly upset if we refused the McRib multiple per people, at least two per person. Wow. Your boss was buying two McRibs per person, two McRibs per people. I think there was a deal. I'm pretty sure they come with a warning label, suggesting not to do that. Was he collecting UPC box tops or something? Caden, I need to ask, the first time it happened, was there a buildup like, y'all McRib

today? Come on, he's fired up. We were kind of excited in the beginning. Apparently it happened, apparently it's been happening. My co-workers originally told me, McRibs back, you know what that means. He's going to do it again. But with Caden, he let us all go, except for me. So I'm his only co-worker.

He set you free. I'm his only employee. Yeah. I'm his only employee. Do you think he was literally like, I can't afford to buy McRibs for all these people? Who seems to love it the most? Well, Caden, I know. Yeah, Caden.

That'll break his heart. My question for y'all is, how do I respectfully decline the McRib when it comes back and it's just me? Okay, Caden, just popped in my head. You ready? Yeah. I wish I could. Doctor says, I got to back off, man.

He said one more could do it. Send me overboard. Okay. And here's what you go to his office and knock knock, boss, take tomorrow. Let me buy the McRibs. And he'll be like, thank you, Caden. That's so sweet. And you show up the next day like, fuck.

I'm so sorry. I'm so that kind of sucks to me. I forgot to bring him this morning. I was going to get him away in the new. It went up by him for him and say, I just couldn't wait, ate mine on the way in. You got to smear a little McRib to yourself. Bring in a couple of rappers in your hands. I actually got three.

That's all. I was having a hungry warning. Do you like the McRib? I enjoy it, but after a while, we ask that of everybody. After a while, by the way, after a while is two in a row, I guess. I mean, about a year's worth of two in a row. Yeah, man. Too much.

That's what McDonald's knows. It's time for them to fly back to Capistrano wherever McRib goes when it's on circulation. Do they just move it from country to country? That's exactly it. Yeah. Yeah. Does that answer your question? No way.

Hold on. We can do better. Show up with sauce on my face. Now the picture's up there. I'm rethinking my question. That sucks. I want it. I would destroy one right now.

What's the green things? Pickles? Pickles, I assume. I hope so. Okay. I mean, not in this picture. In this picture, that's probably a plastic thing meant to represent pickles. Okay.

All right, Travis. Wow. Wow. Do you all know about food staging? Not everything's what it seems. Okay. Do you like the job except for that they make you eat McRibs at it? You know, I could, I'm trying to look for a new job right now.

Okay. Kaden. Hey, hey, hey, Kaden. Respectfully decline to McRib and quit my job. Is the McRib out right now? No. Thank God. Hey, shout out to everybody.

It was just like, I know this from memory. Let me answer without thinking about it. McRib's not out right now. You know how to do this. You have to find it. You're erasing the McRibs. You're on the clock. You're on the clock.

Kaden, next time, next time we come to Austin and we do, and I'm just talking to you right now. Everybody else do whatever. Next time we come and you want to ask a question where you're going to talk shit about your employer, you can use a different name. Yeah. I might have. Oh, you might have.

Okay. That's fine. If you didn't, let us know down below. We'll wait to release this until after the next time the McRib comes back. Yes. Because by that point, if you haven't found a new job by then, Kaden. Hey, are you telling me, Kaden, are you telling me there might be someone listening to this episode and thinking, boy, wouldn't it be, I'm glad Hayden loves the McRibs so much.

I'd be so embarrassed if I was this guy, this poor son of a bitch. Keep bringing me this ungrateful dude. I love y'all and I love the show, but there's no chance he's listening. Okay. You can give me your social security number and you're like fine. Well, no, hopefully somebody's listening to this. Does that answer your question? I think so.

Thank you very much. I've never had a McRib. They're not very good. Now, hold on. They're not terrible. I was excited that the bagel sandwich came back though. No way. Yeah, it's bad.

But not the McPizza or the Broadway. Come on. I know. Hi, I'm Jessica. Hi, Jessica. So here's the issue. Yeah. I've got this Minecraft server with all these kind of friends on it and we started adding

a few people that I work with. So there's probably five or six of us on there. And it's gotten to a point where one of us is no longer serving. What the fuck? What in serving in the in the mind in the war on Creepers? Yes. Okay. And no longer a delight to have in class.

There we go. Okay. They suck. They're not good. They're bad. Wait, no, no. There's been so many things. Are they like bad at the game or are they like burning people's houses down?

There's a huge rate. No, no, none of that. But like you hang out and you're like talking and you're being friends and it's kind of one of those things. Like when they come in, you're like, oh, well, let me head out. Yeah. Okay. And that's him.

Is that them? Yeah. Well, that's your problem right there. I know. I don't even know that much about Minecraft. That's one of the bad guys. And so now the question is, how do I go about saying, please, may you leave? And I still have to go to work.

I see that. I'm glad you saw it outside help. If that's the heat that you're bringing to this situation, Jess. Is that where we're? Okay. So where are they at in the hierarchy? Of work. Yeah.

At work. Yeah. Same level. Okay. Well, you got to get on a different level because then you can be like, I had really good, actually really good advice if you became that person's boss or vice versa. But if you're on the same level, I actually have nothing, but like if you get on a different level at some point, just like, this is actually uncomfortable now.

You understand? Conflict of interest. Conflict of interest. Obviously. This is, this is weird. How, Jessica. Yeah. How comfortable are you with subterfuge?

Because you could change the password to the server. That's not how it works. Can you create a scenario? Wait, hold on. Everybody shut up. This is me and Griffin. Can you create a scenario where they go to log on and they're not able to for some reason? I mean, you can just remove them from the list of people allowed to join the game, but

I don't know how you do that discreetly. This is a real, it's a real pickle. If you do that, do they get like an error message or something? They get a message, they get a letter mailed to their house from Mojang that says you're not friends anymore. Could you start a second server and not tell them about it? And then it's like, yeah, I got really busy. I'm playing this.

Everyone's gotten busy. Everyone's gotten busy. Yeah. We're not on anymore. Can you release 1000 wasps into the server and then you're like, why? Like into the physical, like the, no, into the, no, like this digital wasps from Minecraft and then they're like, your, your, your coworkers like, where have you all been like, oh, we can't with the wasps.

With the wasps is a big problem. We can't do anything in there. Minecraft play, that's pretty big, right? Yeah. Can you guys just move to a different part of the world? It doesn't work. And again, Griffin, can you tell me that'll work? No, yeah, you get on the boat and you go to a different part of the world.

They'll never find you again. Yeah, man. Just sail for the new world or whatever. Leave them behind to run the place. They're gone. It's fine. Can you trap them in the nether? Oh, good thought.

That's the thing that's in Minecraft for sure. If you kill their Minecraft character, do they die in real life? Yes. Yes. They're gone. They're gone. It's fine. Can you trap them in the nether?

Oh, good thought. That's the thing that's in Minecraft for sure. If you kill their Minecraft character, do they die in real life? Yes. Unfortunately, they do. Problem solved. You're going to have to... Hey, Jessica, how comfortable are you with murder?

No, we can't. That can't always be the answer. In Minecraft. Can you have someone in the server put on a skin that seems like a costume that's like... I mean, the only thing I can think is like Jesus and then have it when everybody's playing have them come in and be like, y'all did it. You beat Minecraft. Bye.

And you're like, we did it, guys. We're not playing Minecraft anymore. We beat it. But then next week... You do play Minecraft again. You're going to... Guys, we've been freed from Minecraft. We finished.

You have to build credits in Minecraft. You get a bunch of redstone and then you flip a switch and then you start rolling. Like, we did it. We got it. It's a game. Does any of that help? Yeah. These are a lot of Minecraft buzzwords.

I love them. Yeah, we are. Huge. Thank you. Thank you so much. Thank you. Thank you. Hello.

I see way more people at the microphone than we have called down, which is I'll be straight with y'all. Pretty terrifying. Hello. I thought for sure you were not going to pick my question. Oh, okay. Oh, Josh. Why'd you submit that?

Well, because I thought it was... I liked it for a second and then I sent it. It's really good, Josh. Own it. Let's go. Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh, Josh. Josh, you're going to say your question out loud and the reaction you get from the audience is going to make you feel silly for quibbling.

What's your question, Josh? I have a bunch of Lego sets. Yeah. And I live in a small apartment, so I can't, like, put them in the closet or anything. No, why would you? What a wild sentence. The apartment's small, so I can't put them away. You know how people in their palatial mansions, all right, hold the stash.

They're like a closet. They're walking closets. The bourgeois. So I've been trying to figure out how to make them seem more sophisticated or, I think, the other word that I used was... Sexist. Sexist. Yeah, you said sexy, Josh.

Sexy Lego sets for potential suitors. Yeah, sure, Josh. You could own it. You have to own it. That's for sure. Yeah. Oh, possibly important. Like, two of my bigger sets are the Disney Castle.

Hell, yeah. Nice. Everyone loves that. And the Nintendo NES set. Very cool. Okay. That rules. And presumably the set from Seinfeld, everybody's got that Lego set in the Friends Cafe.

Listen, the key is lighting, right? The way that you've lit them. Okay. This is going to not be a joke. Light them like they're museum pieces. Light them with like the tiny directional, they're on a thing. Maybe even like a rotating, they're on a turning table. Maybe.

And when the suitor comes over, you're taking close-up macro-physographies. Now, I didn't say that part. They're in compromising position. That'd be fantastic. Maybe even surround them with like laser grids. Oh, that's cool. And you say, don't get too close. And hire Danny Ocean to try to steal it.

Not George Clooney, mind you. The real guy. The real guy that it's based on. To come in and then catch him in the act. And your suitor's going to be like, what? I got to drive him off at least twice a week. This guy's always trying to steal my Lego sets. Yes.

They're pretty sophisticated. And if I may, sexy. That's like David. That's like David Ocean. That's who Danny Ocean is based on. They take advantage of the same like pathway and just put a little sign in front of each one that says first one ever. And then as you get into the tour, like, and yes, this is, I don't mean to brag, but

the first one of these they ever did. So it's pretty rare. Pretty huge. Maybe get a trophy that says best Lego building. Yeah. I'm just like, yeah, they gave them to me. You could also just point at each set and be like, yeah, freestyle that one too. Then they commissioned the designs based off of what I do.

What I freestyled. That's very good. Hey, I could talk about Legos for the rest of the night. If that's okay with you, Josh, I say that I don't actually have anything else to say about Legos. I got really confident. They show a commitment to detail and organization, focus, follow through all things you want in a potential suitor.

That's for sure. I'm saying not a bad way to go. Now, here's what you don't want to do, Josh. Start listing off how much you paid for them. Because that maybe is not a thing you look forward to. Oh, how much on the castle? Oh, look at the time. Are you factoring in man hours?

It's a lot. It's a lot. I think walking into someone's apartment who is a potential suitor and seeing all their Lego sets is pretty cool. You know, it's even cooler when they make you watch them build it right in front of them for two and a half hours. Josh, it kind of feels like sensual music and museum lighting. Josh, it kind of feels like you're just kind of standing there.

We're just launching volley after volley of half-hearted Lego. I don't even think you like that. You're more of a connect person, I guess. Does that help? It's very helpful. All right, thank you. Hello. Hello.

Who are you? You can bring that microphone up a little bit if you... I don't know how to do that. Oh, hell yeah. Look at you. You're natural. I'll just squint. That's fine.

All right. My name is Chad. Hi, Chad. Hi, Chad. My question. I recently bought a house. I've got a back neighbor. Yeah, let's hear it for a home ownership.

In this economy? Okay. I've got a back neighbor. It's a rear-facing neighbor, so I'm on a cul-de-sac. They're on a cul-de-sac. I've never had a reason to actually meet them. Two back-to-back sacks. Back-to-back sacks.

Back-to-back sacks. Cool. I've never met this person, but I can see their living room TV from my back porch when I'm letting my dog out. It's okay. Stick with us. So I'm letting my dog out. So I killed them.

What do you think is going to be the question? I can see into their living room. I can see their TV. We have similar tastes in TV. I've seen them watch Community. I saw Monty Python on there. All right, all right. A lot of good stuff.

Kind of niche. Close enough that we could be friends over it. Yeah, okay. I have no idea how to meet them. Yeah. They're not next-door neighbors there. Hey, Chad, I got one way. I know for sure you can't meet them.

And that's telling them that you've enjoyed their TV selections through their window. I can say that we can go ahead and roll that one out if we want to use throttle elimination. So you see the conundrum. Yeah, no, it's a trick. This is a very, very, very good question, Chad. I'll tell you why. Can you move your TV to your porch? Oh, that's good.

Loudly appreciate it. Yeah. I love this Democratic community. Let's sync up. I have actually started whistling the community theme song when I'm walking outside. That's a great start, Chad. Chad sounds like me in middle school. I like that you don't think that's something you would do now today to...

Do you do that when you saw a guy doing woodworking in his open garage? Yeah. That's similar. Yeah. Similar. Okay, Paul. Paul's put up a picture of her with the binoculars. You don't have to use any sort of like implements to see the TV better, right?

That goes wrong. No, I don't... Okay. God, is there anything better than driving past an accident and seeing what somebody's watching on the TV? Oh, man. Society's the only form of like, yeah, that's all right. You can take...

Listen, you can like one look at our TV screen. You can't slow down. But if you happen to notice we're watching sports, it just makes you feel a little less alone, you know? Yeah, sure. Well, watch the TV. It's the most I'm ever interested in sports on TV. Yeah, what are you doing?

Hey, what's up? Ooh, looks nice. I have two neighbors whose living rooms I can see with crystal clarity from our house in D.C. One of whom watches football and scandal exclusively, as far as I can tell. And one of whom... I can't say their TV too good, but I can see in their office and they definitely have LED like gamer keyboard lights.

And so I bet they probably... I bet there's probably some overlap in our sort of cultural sort of expertise. I do not know how to make that. Hey, I noticed your keyboard lights up. Now, hold on. They bought a light up keyboard, though. They want somebody to notice it. Probably not for my...

Then for who, Griffin? I assume they're many YouTube subscribers or... It's PewDiePie, my neighbor's funeral. I mean, the suggestion of like turning your TV out to face them is actually good, but then when you think through it, it just creates the inverse problem on the other side, right? Because then they now have to be the ones that are like, hey, I saw your selections. The rest of that is yard signs. Yard signs to say, hey, if you look at my window and see someone cool on TV,

let's be friends. Kind of say hi. You know what? Don't do that. Don't do that. That sucks. Yeah, this one sucked, too. You know what, Chad?

Close your blinds. Stay inside. Make other friends. Yeah. Start looking for hyper-local forums. Like, we're all my other Huntington people. The community community. Yeah, sure.

The community community community. T-shirts. T-shirts. Let's say I look at your TV and I'm sorry, but why don't we friends? No. Like that advertise the media that you'd like to discuss. If we're projecting so completely onto your neighbor, I think we can also assume that they...

No, it's not a projection. It's LED, right? Oh. Boo. Boo this man. I'm powered by it. I'm just saying that if you all like the same TV shows and you're pretty confident that you all would get along, if you went to them and explained your situation,

they might find it relatable in a way that I do right now. And you know what, Chad, if you need a little bit more information, go through their mail and see it. Yeah. Yeah. Maybe they got a TV guide in there that they've circled. And then mailed back to themselves. Mailed back to themselves.

As a poor man's copyright. If I'm honest. Like in the lake house. I submitted this question hoping that maybe they were out here somewhere. Does anyone here have a TV and watch community? Is your TV near a window? Does Chad live behind you? Chad, I'm sorry we couldn't be of more help, but you know,

normally I ask that we help, but I feel pretty comfortable. We didn't do much in this one. It's good. So thanks for our time together. I guess is what I'm saying. Thank you. Thank you for the confidence boost. Yeah.

Can we get a quick audience poll? This is the second time I've worn this sailors outfit. The first time was for a, thank you. The first time was for a virtual live show. The quick question is, is it stolen valor? Thank you, Travis. I don't know what rank this is, but I can't believe it's high enough that someone's going to see me at a cheap.

I'm not walking. Well, you have the blue anchor where you got cold ones. And you were awarded the blue. I'm just saying just as has captain on it. And that's way more stolen valor than whatever this is. Private first clap. Private. Second.

Second. Private second. You don't get anything for that. If I was going to steal valor, I would go for like admiral or something. Now I will say this Griffin, I would pay a lot of money to see a video of you walking and do like a, a yoga child that I would feel like a veteran. This guy. Walking to a twisted by Wetzel.

So just like, I'm not paying for any of these. I served on the SS lollipop. Don't. Okay. Once again, thank you so much to moon tower just for laughs and ACL live for having us here. This is amazing. Amazing.

I can't. I wish you could all come backstage because it looks really cool back. It's very cool. Very cool place. There have been like famous people here. Yeah. Coldplay was here once. Thank you to Chloe Dungate again for the poster design, which you may or may not be

able to find out in the lobby outside. And let's hear it for Paul and Amanda and Rachel. We couldn't have done the show without them. Thanks everybody. Thanks y'all. Thank you to Montaigne for the use of our theme song. My life is better with you. And a big shout out to our openers, the trailer bark boys.

I am meant a lot that they could be here tonight for us. I know nothing about them. Sure. Uh, Trev? Oh no. Are you about to get on your phone to find a Jack Johnson quote real fast? Did you forget that this is your responsibility? I did.

Talk about, just say something else. Keep thanking people. Uh, thank you to, hey, if you all thank us, thank you. We're going to be over in San Jose. You want to come out or Denver, which is closer? Denver. Denver. Yeah.

Whoa. Okay. We're going to be in Denver. If you want to come over there. Trev, you got those quotes? Hey, all right. I don't have a little bit of the old actors nightmare over here. If you want to go ahead and bust out the spell that sets me free from this prison.

Got to get to a good one, Justin. Sorry. Just give me a second. Any collection of syllables that you, that you. Here we go. Okay. We could park the van and walk to town. Find cheapest bottle of wine that we could find.

And talk about the road behind how getting lost is not a waste of time. Jack Johnson. Thank you. Jack, I'm Justin MacGor�y. I'm Travis Mackzroy. Griffin Macgar audio. My brother, my brother, my kiss your dad square on the lips. Thank you.

It's better with you. Oh, it's better, it's better with two, my life. Oh, it's better with you.