My Brother, My Brother And Me - My Brother, My Brother and Me 22: Lovegoose

Episode Date: September 20, 2010

This week's episode is dedicated to the neverending leadership and heroism exhibited every waking moment by Mr. Matthew McConnaughey. We suggest watching at least two of Mr. McConnaughey's motion pictures as a complimentary experience to this episode. Might we suggest Fools' Gold and Sahara? Or, if you're listening with a loved one, How To Lose a Guy In Ten Days and The Wedding Planner? Suggested talking points: A constant bongo beat, wassassin, the Geordi contingent, big funeral home, Lolito, beer mall, deep cuts in the boneyard, the elegant curvature

The McElroy brothers are not experts, and their advice should never be followed. Travis insists he's a sexpert, but if there's a degree on his wall, I haven't seen it. Also, this show isn't for kids, which I mention only so the babies out there will know how cool they are for listening. What's up, you cool baby? If you change your mind, on the first in line, honey, I'm still free, take a chance on me. If you need me, let me know, gonna be around. If you've got no place to go when you're feeling down.

If you're all alone, when the pretty birds have long, honey, I'm still free. Game day. Time to play to the whistle blows. This is a sage device passed on by one Matthew McConaughey, and we are marching. It's a device we try to live by every single day. It's my brother, my brother, and me. It's an advice show for the modern era. What we do here is channel the wisdom of Matthew McConaughey and try to filter it to a form

that is usable to you, the common man or woman. What would you guys think of when I edit the show this week? We just get a constant bongo beat going on underneath it. Yeah, like a really groovy, really chill. Something you can really sack to. Yeah, and you can hear the spirit sort of welling up from the bongo tones. I am so disgusted right now. It's for worse.

Well, instead of the bongos, I would be happy listening to 40 minutes of bongos, but let's instead not waste our talent. Let's not keep our proverbial light under a bushel. Let's let's pass down some wisdom. Our first question comes from form spring. I proposed to my girlfriend a couple of weeks ago and she said yes. Congratulations. But I found out she's been texting one of her coworkers a lot lately.

One of the texts said that he was watching a movie and he started thinking of her. What do I do? Form spring, form spring, form spring. OK, I don't like the sound of it, but I also don't like the sound of you reading her text messages. Can I propose something, Griffin? I'm sorry to step on some toes here, but my advice is to pack your bags. No, no, I'm with them on this one. I think you got to get out.

You don't trust her and she's in love with Jerry in Accounts Receivable. You got to get out. Listen, man, you both fucked up. You both fucked up. You don't trust her. She doesn't love you. You fucked up. You have a reason to not trust her because she's fucking Jerry in Accounts Receivable,

but this is the true test of love that everyone goes through after they propose to their significant other. It's that both of them get the jitters and one of them fucks someone they work with and one of them reads her text message, which isn't as bad a crime, I think. Now, OK, now, joking aside, because this is serious, you are at a point in a marriage where it's possible that she is not regretting the decision to agree to marry you, but maybe she's feeling a little spooked by it and she's getting a little flirty with Jerry. And, you know, you are making a long-term commitment to her and you're being kind of a jealous dude about it, like all completely natural emotions.

But here's the thing, like, if you are at this point in your relationship, like you're not even married yet, you have got to be able to talk to her. Like, you've got to be able to say, hey, just walk up to her, grab her shoulders and say, hey, I forgive you for fucking Jerry in Accounts Receivable, and see what the reaction was. Just start the conversation. And, Forbes ring, I'm not trying to judge you, but this is like general advice for everyone. If you propose to your girlfriend before you trust her enough to not cheat on you, you shouldn't have proposed to her yet.

Now, listen, that's in the past. Look at Travis in the rear view. I'm looking at the future. I'm just saying, like, this is general advice for everyone from the future on. That should be on your checklist before you pop that question. I agree. I agree. But what you're feeling is natural.

The thing is, if you get in that jealous mindset where you think something's going on, that is something that your partner is not going to be able to talk you down from. Like, they're not going to be able to say anything that will satisfy that. You've got to let that go. Like, if you want to talk to her about it, talk to her about it, but then seriously, let it go. Because that kind of shit will haunt you forever. Also, you're a guy, right? I think so.

Think back. Think back for a second there, Forbes ring. You ever said some creepy stuff to a girl that's in a relationship? I bet you have. If you're a dude, I bet you said some creepy stuff to a girl who's engaged, married, or in a serious relationship, right? Let him without sin. Without sin.

Yeah, really. Cast that first tone for him. And honestly, the last thing you want to do is to go out to her and say, hey, I was reading your texts. Yeah. Black. I have another suggestion that's good for the economy, if you think about it. There's one industry that's been really suffering in these rough times.

Oil. No. It is the profession, the noble profession of the private investigator. Whoa. Yeah. Get Keith Mars upon that bit. Get Keith or Veronica if they're available. Or Encyclopedia Brown.

Encyclopedia Brown, Nancy Drew, any of these fictional characters. See if they're available to just follow her around. Guys, listen. I can't even say this, but I'll use Pig Latin so no one will talk about it. What about a professional prey assassin way? Listen. Listen. Assassin?

Well, like with a vowel. What is it? What's that? You got to add a W. It's French. You got a W at the end of his vowel. Hey, get a hit man. Hit man.

Hey, that's what we're talking about. Okay. Airy J. She'll run to you. She'll be so distraught. She'll respond to the loss of her precious jewelry that she'll never leave you again. And at the funeral, at just one point, say really cryptically, well, that's what happens. Well, sure.

And then there's that if you follow through with this plan, you delete this episode of Mabin Bam from your computer. Oh my God. So when the police read it, they'll be like, this is so weird. There's no episode 22 in here. We were really enjoying it. It just skips 22. Oh, and make sure, make sure as you're driving away, you hand her a handy wipe and she'll

look at you quizzically and you say, oh, that's for the blood on your hands. I hope the text, I hope the texts are worth it, creepo. This is from clearly not a stalker Gmail. Huh. Well, huh. Well, good start. I was recently in class and I overheard a girl's name. Okay.

Sounds pretty normal so far. She looked cute. So I ascertained her last name by checking the role online. And I proceeded to Google her and got information about her family and her brother and her birthday and everything. My question is this is asking about her family a good opener. Straight up ask. How's James?

I saw on Google. He was sick. Thanks. I can't finish the question. Don't do that at all. In fact, travel back in time and don't do all that shit. You just told us you did. What's more important is go back in time and not send us that question.

Listen, you can't, you can't ever be with her now. You've got to bail on this. You're done with this. You messed this one up. You get married, you got toddlers running on the floor and you look at her and you say, hey, babe, I know we've had a long happy decade together. I just want to tell you that I started our relationship by creepy. You remember Google that used to be on the internet?

You remember the internet? It used to be before y'all had implants. Before the Cybernet. I Googled you. Before the Cybernet. Before Skynet. I Googled you and your whole family. Okay.

Here's my advice. Go to a novelty store and buy a Jordy advisor and then run up to her and tell her that you're her grandson from the future. Come back and use all that information to convince her that you are her grandson from the future. I am a big fan. Wow. You guys have a complete 180.

I am a huge fan of everything that has happened so far. Clearly not a stalker. The Jordy contingent, let's call it. If you employ the Jordy contingent, I think that there's a really great chance that you could have the love of your life in your hands. Oh, and then convince her that you're your own grandfather. Yeah. That's good.

Just why don't we cut out the middleman and actually hire LeVar Burton to put on the Jordy advisor, come to your school and say that he is your great-grandson from the future. I'm sure he is not busy. Yeah. I'm pretty sure you could probably lock him down. And if you're a white person, clearly not a stalker, it'll show you like you're super open-minded. You're down for anything.

You don't care. You don't see race. And that's something people are looking for in a stalker. I mean potential partner, not a stalker at all from the future. Jay? Oh, Griffin, do you have a Yahoo for us? Yeah, let me bust out a Yahoo. This one was sent in by, see, this one's more of an in-this-show question.

How about this one's from WaxCatharsis, who sent this in via Twitter. Fan of the show WaxCatharsis. Thank you, WaxCatharsis. It's by Yahoo Answers user, I am life. Who asks, how can a person live young forever in this body? Is it possible for a person to live forever young in this body? We have been programmed to died. We purchased gravesite plot and life insurance.

So is it possible for a person to deprogram themselves to live instead of dying? Whoa. I'm glad someone finally cleared away the mist. You know what I mean? Yeah. Right. Right through the BS. Every time I go to a funeral, I just look at them and think, oh, you.

You dummy. You cog in the machine, doing exactly what the man tells you to do. Everyone knows that death is just a creation of big funeral home. Yeah. And big funeral home. Big funeral home. There's a really depressing answer on this, which says the inevitability of death is what gives us a reason to live.

Immortality would never work. You know you are going to live forever, so who cares? The population would fall into a depression. You know what? Everyone says that. I completely disagree. If I live forever. It would be awesome.

It would be a nonstop 24 seven party. Into infinity. I think I could probably figure out something to do. I mean, I know, right? Like, I would just start walking. Yeah. And just see where you're going. But like, I don't know.

I have forever. Not afraid to die in though. Yeah. Because it's not going to happen. It would make bad plastic surgery really regrettable though. Oh, that's true. Also tattoos. And you would need it.

Yeah. Tattoos. You would need it around your 48,000th birthday. I think it would also allow us to complete a bunch of projects that you like didn't get around to. Like, you know, living in space. I just want to program myself to live until the first time that I use a jet pack. Like, if I have a jet pack, I'll probably try to fly that bitch into the sun because it's not going to get better than that.

No. That's just saying. Humanity is going to peak. What's troubling about this question is the terminology that we have been programmed to died. Is there like a, is that an outpatient procedure I don't know about? Like a doctor can just cut you open and like hook this vein up to this artery and then mix these nerves.

And then what's up? I'm, I'm the Highlander now. Except what if, what if the person who wrote this is a, not quite human? If you catch my drift by Cent, by Centennial man, anyone, he only wants to be a human so that he can bone down on that one chick from that one show or movie. His love is real, but he is. Oh, I was going to say his love is real, but his understanding of Grammar is not. Damn it.

Damn it. Stupid AI jokes. Hi guys. Hello, James. Recently, school has started back up and my English teacher from last year contacted me saying, I had the most improvement between the last two quarters. God, I thought this email was going to take a sexy turn for a second. I got excited as such.

She wishes for me to choose a book by Friday for her to buy and add to her class library. Okay. Maybe it is turning around again. Last year, she had really boring cookie cutter books all year. So I want to recommend something interesting and appealing that a student would otherwise not find or read. I also wanted it to be something keyed into the nerd mindset without being diluted or corny.

I've come up stumped and wished for some McClare of William Hill. All right. I'll allow it. What do you guys recommend with befuddlement? James from MA. I, what about the secret? You want to set those kids on the right path. You want to get them thinking in a mindset that's going to equate with success and get

rid of some of the demons that have been tormenting them. What about Dianetics? James, Dianetics, that's my official recommendation. I think that there's a vein we can tap into of books that will somehow create a sexual rendezvous with your teacher. Books that will somehow suggest like, hey, if you're down, I'm down. But none are escaping me. Is there a book out there?

Is there a book out there that said, hey, teach if you're down, I'm down? This is my novelization. Lolita for dudes. Lolita for dudes. Dude, Lolita. Lolito. Lolita. Lolita.

Lolita. Have you, what about a novelization of the film The Graduate? See that, well, that's not a teacher as much as it is just a foxy older lady. Well, what about, is this what Tuesdays with Mori was about? I didn't read it. Yeah. No, but it is what Mitch Album's One More Day was about. Okay.

Yeah. I get his books confused. The ones are about getting wisdom from the elderly and the ones are about boning down with your teacher. Yeah, there's some that are about just having conversations with his dead journalism professors, and then there are some where he fucks older teachers. And there are crossover books that... The crossover books are in poor taste, Mitch Album.

You need to get it together, sir. Stupid Mitch. What an asshole. I recommend The Alphabet of Manliness by Maddox. Yeah. No way. My terrible secret is that I haven't read a book in about five years. Whoa.

Sleep tight. Sleep tight. People who are taking advice from us. How about The Stand since I've been working on that one for about two and a half years now? See, I was going to say Dune. Dune? Yeah.

Guys, Griffin came and visited me like two weeks ago, and he said, I haven't read The Stand. I got like 50 pages left. Yeah. I haven't picked it up for about three weeks. What are you doing? I got about 40 pages left now. I knocked out 10 the other day.

That's when I'll import for about six minutes. Yeah. You need to maybe start, you need to get more regular if that's all the reading you're doing. Maybe. Maybe that's the problem. Hey. Hey.

My bin bam. My friends are 21-ish and still think I'm, and still think going to the mall like a bunch of girls is still. Sexist. Are they girls? Okay. How do I get them to stop being so lame, turn that mall time into bar time? Thanks, Steve.

That's easy. By turning, you got to turn your friends into other friends. Can I try that? And you can. Thanks, Steve. Sorry. Turn your friends into other friends. I like that.

You could go to the, we have a place in the Huntington Mall Club, Block and Barrel or something where it's like a bar within the mall. I like that. Yeah. Go to a mall bar. I think there are two answers to this question. Well, there's one answer and one observation. The answer is to get them in the mindset that a bar is basically a mall for booze, for

spirits. Beer. It's like a beer mall. It's like a beer mall, basically. Well, not all are beer malls. Some of them are like shitty beer strip malls where they only have Miller Lite and you know. And some of them are strip beer malls, which is a whole other thing.

But the other way of looking at it is you have a problem, which is maybe they do go to the bar with you, you know, a normal amount, but you don't want to go to the mall with them because they don't serve liquor there. I picture this awesome like 1980s movie kind of situation where you're like, hey guys, let's go to a bar and all your friends kind of look at each other and smile and go, man, it's not bar time. And then in unison say it's mall time and then cuts to like a montage of them like doing jumping jacks in the mall and stuff.

But the whole time you're freaking out. You're just having a panic attack. You go drive your car into a house. Jeremy, what are we doing this afternoon? I got to go pick up a gift for my me mall at the Creighton Barrel. Oh, fuck that. Let's get drunk. Fuck that noise.

I need some cargo. It's noon. Hold up. Hold up. Hold up. Hold up. The mall closes at nine. What are you doing?

Like, how could you not work these two things out together? Like, how could you not work this out? Well, the mall is closed now. Time to go to a bar. If you're in the back of the hot topic hiding behind the corset, sneaking a drink from your flask, your friends are doing you a disservice from not tackling you and ripping the aboos out of your hand. Hey, guys, is it bar time?

No, Steve, it's funeral time. I want to put beer in my face. I'm 21. I already have a problem. Oh, God. I'm headed to university on the 26th. Speak English, motherfucker. Whoa.

He means college. I'm headed to university on the 26th, and I wondered if you guys had any tips for introducing myself to those who will be living on the same floor of my student accommodation blog. I'm usually rather shy when it comes to meeting new people. Before I would get my friends to do all the hard work and let the new person be introduced to me in conversation. However, my friends are spreading out, heading to different universities. So I'll be on my lonesome.

What's the best way to build up the confidence to say hi to someone new? Or would you recommend me doing the opposite, play some music on my laptop, then hope and pray someone will dig my taste in tunes, which is very broad, to act as a conversation starter? No. Don't do that, Richard. Don't do that. Hey, who's that guy that's always playing music from his laptop with his door open and looking expectably outside?

With a bowl of chips and a couple of open beers. That's weird, Richard. No one goes in his room. Don't go in there. He's always talking about deep Dave Matthews band cuts to nobody. He's just yelling it into the hallway. Oh, if anybody wants to talk about music, I'll be in here. He calls his room the boneyard.

He's a beast side to under the table and dreaming. Deep cut. I went out of the boneyard, got this deep cut. Richard real answers everyone else's feeling the exact same way that you are. You can set yourself up as the cool guy just by walking up to people and introducing yourself because they want to be introduced to you just as bad as you want to be introduced to them. Like you've got to pretend when you get there day one, you've already made five friends.

Act like a guy who's already made five friends there because then you won't come off as desperate and you'll have the confidence to really talk with people. Also a great thing to have in your room. Gold Nye. Yeah, that's what I was going to say. Set up a Gold Nye tournament. I knew Chelsea was going to win that thing. Yeah.

Gold Nye in your dorm room. I went one step further and I took my N64 to like the common room and hooked it up to the TV and started playing. So it's like people filtered in there like, oh, what's this? Also start a poker night. Poker night would be good too. Yeah. Something that people want to get into and try and it's like a good way to meet people.

There's also Richard a ton of like any university is going to have a ton of like clubs and stuff like that. People where you're going to like the people on your floor, they'll be good as like starters, but college is so broad and so much broader than high school, which are used to that you are going to make general friends there, but you're going to want to specify a little bit when you're making like your lifelong college friends, you know, because the people on your dorm are just geographically close to people who you meet and like music club for fans of a deep Dave Matthews band cuts, they're going to be people who really share your interests

and better friends. You said clubs, which made me think of night clubs, which sent me down this vein that I'm really, I really think he could get into. It would require a bit of an investment, maybe a $200 investment, but go out and buy a whole bunch of fancy liquors, like a Jen or a Scotch or a Scotchka. And then you put those, you arrange them in your room, like a bar and you could turn your dorm room into like a, a, a speakeasy. Whoa.

Yeah. That's actually a pretty good idea. That's actually a good way to get out of going to college. If you want it to be a short stay, cause you will, you will be asked to leave. No, if he's at university and he's like in some brick country, that can drink all the time. The drinking age there is like four in a beer garden. You can be.

And that's mandatory. Yeah. Some kids are born in beer gardens. Hey, get that toddler a Bruce key. I want to have an underwater birth at a beer garden. I would like to be born into a vat of freshness. I hate to bring it. It's a little bit late.

Yeah. Damn it. What, what's, what's the best way to get over a girl you are madly in love with? And one day her feelings just changed and she needed a break. I'm hurting but Ben Bam helped me this from Dex, Gmail, Griffin. You know what he needs to do? You have come to the right place. Well the obvious answer is pack up those bags and get out of town.

You had a good run, but it's all over now. The other thing you can do is surround yourself with dudes, which again, you've come to the right place because the three of us will just rail on that girl. Just that, that bitch, that awful, mean, I'm not the right person for this, but go find your bros. Wait, wait, wait, what if, what if he introduced her to the show while they were together? We don't really mean it. Oh fuck.

No, we didn't mean a girl. Hey, listen up. Hey, hey. You know what's wrong girl? You know what it is? No. You know what? I'm taking sides.

Dex is in her right, listen, you broke his, you done broke his heart and you should feel terrible about it, Dex. Taking her side. You're taking her side. No, I'm taking Dex's side. He was not good enough for you girl. I'm taking her side. I'm going to say, I'm going to say neutral here and say you guys should maybe talk it

out, see if there's still a spark there. Justin. Alright. Let's talk it out. Her feelings have changed. Listen. Listen, my feelings have changed. a good run together, but now I'm looking to move on.

I want to fuck Jerry, and it counts receivable. Griffin. Listen, he is all over the place. I'm the only one who can give you what you want, what you need, what you have to have, what you gotta get. It's not there. I cannot, I gotta feel the weight on my skin. Let's stay positive.

Let's stay positive here. Griffin, go. Let's take a five minute recess. Okay, but I want to come back to this. I don't want to just shut it out just like everything else. Why did you never open up to me? Dex. Dex.

I feel like we've made a lot of good progress here. You've gotta open up to her, Dex. You gotta open up as you're packing your bags. And can I side note? Let her go. Don't open up to her. Let her go, it's over. Get away.

It's me, it's Dex. I wanted to open up to you real quick. I'm packing, I'm moving away forever. I want to open up while closing this box. Toss it all, toss your cares, toss your worries and your woes into that big black Samsonite. You are done.

We get a lot of questions. Your name is Dex. You could fuck anybody you want whenever you want. Fact. The answer to this question is really cliche, but unfortunately it's time. It's time and getting lots of strange. Whoa, I'm half with you.

Which half? I really miss my old girlfriend and I have a VD. I don't feel better. I do not miss my untainted penis. I miss my untainted. Okay, then let's do anything, but don't sleep with lots of women, but get flirted with by lots of women,

flirt with lots of women. Just get the attention of other women until you feel happy and desirable again. Hey, this is an interesting coincidence. This is from Gmail. There's this guy at work that was just really nice and now he's become my occupational stalker. I'm a secretary and I sent out mass emails to our floor.

He always replies with personal, suggestive replies. I'm married and I don't want to embarrass him, plus it's not quite sexual harassment. It's just flirty old man creepy. How do I make him stop emailing me weird messages? You gotta forward it. You gotta forward his responses. And then when he gets uncomfortable,

he'll say, oh, I thought you were joking. Yeah. Just, yeah, you gotta forward him. Or you could do something where you accidentally reply all to one of the emails that he sends you and just say like, listen, creep, I'm not interested and he'll be so ashamed that he may have to kill himself. That's really the end game, Tayden.

It's kind of a scorched earth policy that you're all the stocking. Yeah, I don't know. I've never worked in an office before. Sometimes Justin sends me weird emails, but I keep those locked away. Just tell him it's really sad. That's the best thing you can do.

If you say no, then it's like you're playing a game, but if you're like, this honestly kind of presses me when you send these because it's so out of the realm of possibility that I would ever look at you with anything other than contempt and just make him feel really ashamed of himself. You know what I mean? Is he rich?

Tell him that you're his grandson from the future. This is Travis' dude, pack your bags and move away. I like it. I think it can be applied to many situations. Because here's the thing. Even if he knows that it's blatantly not true. What? No, I think it's a lady.

Okay. It says secretary and have you ever heard of something so farcical and ridiculous as a male secretary? Get real. Hey, here's a pretty smooth transition. Here's a Yahoo Answers question that was sent in by Eric Nier. Thank you Eric Nier.

It's by Yahoo Answers user, Ben Edwards, who asks, I think, so he's not positive, but he thinks that he is in love with a goose. What should he do? You know what it is. It's that fucking neck, man. Oh my God, what couldn't it swallow, right? Well, I mean, I'm not even talking about the length.

I'm talking about the elegant curvature. Oh my God. Look, that's exactly what I have in that elegant curvature. So it would work out really well. It's like a mysterious, sexy question mark. Hey, I'll tell you what you need to do. Can you reread the question Griffin? Sure.

I think. Okay, here's our operative word here. Here's what you need to do. You need to shore this shit up and figure out if you're in love with a goose. Take a long look in a deep dark truthful mirror and think about whether or not you want to stick that goose's beak in your butthole.

Do you want to fuck a goose or not? This is not something you're equivocal on. It's something you know. Do you want to fuck the goose? I'm up. Yes or no? I'm on the fence on my position on goose fucking. Okay, no, wait.

Now we don't know he wants to fuck it. He may just want to be in love with the goose. There's lots of different love. There's lots of different love. That's so true Travis. Such a good point. Maybe he wants to adopt the goose. The thing is he dreams about it all the time.

He dreams about it all the time. So what is he dreaming about it? Like he's going antique shopping at flea markets with his love goose. Yeah, okay. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. This is fine. Give him a little suit.

I mean, it's not fine. It's not fine Justin. It's not fine. He's talking about a goose. And by the way, the side note the guy who wrote in asking for names for his band, Love Goose is an awesome name.

You could put a little Jordy LeForge visor on it and say it's your goose's son for the future. Well, that one didn't work quite so well. It works for me. It works for me. He comes from a weird island of Dr. Moro-esque future where man animal hybrids are the same. He has the brain of a man or a woman

if you don't want to be gay. Gay goose lovers, the worst. I want a hetero goose lovers, only in the ladies. Hey, I'm no weirdo. I'm gonna fuck a lady goose. I'm not in an aberration to God. What kind of deviant shit do you think I'm into?

I only fuck female goose's. Geese's. No homo or nothing. I just want to fuck a goose. I just like to fuck a goose now. I like to kick back with a cold brew and fucking goose. Just chill out, watch a game, eat some coin chips and fuck my goose.

It's been a long, hard day at work. Time for some good old fashioned goose fucking. I say goose, get back in the kitchen, finish making dinner and the goose is like, I'm a goose, I can't even get to the counter. The only recipe I know is seeds. Goose, where's all my bread? You ate it again.

Get over here, I'ma fuck you. Goose, I told you not to eat that ball of sun chips we left out, let's forget. Goose quit walking in a line with other geese. Get over here, I'm trying to fuck. Get over here, you're mine. I lost you, I forgot which one you were. I'm in love with one of you,

I'm gonna have to fuck all of you to figure out which one. Oh no. Oh God, I'm just sick of the neighborhood kids spray painting goose fucker on my porch. Well, I wouldn't mind if they would stop running gay goose fucker, don't they get it? Let's be clear. Listen, I'm at church every day with my goose wife

and a dress next to me while the Reverend preaches but I can't listen that close because all I can think about is how bad I want to get down on this goose. It's Adam and Geese, not Adam and Steve. Okay, that's it, the show is about to be over. That has to be where we start the show. We have to draw the line, let's be drawn there.

Few housekeeping notes before we hear Griffin's last question. It's always, it's always, it's great to have your support, it's great to have you listening, we super, super appreciate it. Everything you need to know if you wanna ask a question is on mbmbam.com, there are still t-shirts, we would love it if you wanted to wear that.

And if you've already got one, send us, I want more pictures, we're gonna try to get together a gallery to host on the website. If you've got pictures of you wearing a, my brother, my brother, me shirt in a funny locale or you put it on a baby, we love everything like that, send those to us. Also, we're instituting a new program this week.

We got the idea from our buddy Jeff Montelog and he had a party, a mbmbam party and we recorded a little special message to them and this is an offer we'd like to extend to everyone. So, if you are having a party for my brother, my brother, me and my brother, my brother, me listening party, we will let us know ahead of time, we'll record a special greeting just for you.

It has, let's see, what's a party? We need some parameters, yeah, because it can't just be you inviting those of you over to your cubicle to listen. The Bible says that anytime two or more are gathered in my name, I'll be there too, that's God. We're bigger than the Beatles, the Beatles are bigger than Jesus. Is Jesus bigger than God?

Five people. See, I was gonna say four, five. No, I think four is a good number, I think four is around four. No, five, one is the host, four guests. No, no, I don't think that's gonna, I don't think it's gonna happen, I think it's gonna be three people who listen to the show, who invite their one friend over.

Okay, we'll do four, we'll say four. Four people and let us know, you know, names or whatever, you can email that to us and the only thing we ask is afterwards, we're gonna need a picture. A picture didn't happen. That's brief. A picture didn't happen,

gotta have something mobim bam in there. And if you can, invite somebody new into the fold. Yeah, right, right, that's the idea. I mean, it's absolutely, it's crazy, it's absolutely insane that people are having parties that are centered around us talking for 40 minutes. That's completely bananas to me already, but that's how every party I go to ends up.

Try and get some new people, even if you don't have a party, just try and get some new people in the show because we don't have any way of getting new people on board other than getting new people. Jeff Monlach's weekly mobim bam listening party is blowing up, he's got seven guests. Oh man, they have confirmed.

Brenton, Henry, Zach, David, Jeff, Michael, Robbie, huge party. So seven is the number to beat. As long as you keep been fighting me, I'm gonna keep saying maybe, so feel free to use that. So yeah, send that to us, and you know what we'll do, we'll put something on the website or on the Facebook

that has the dates if you want to get down on this program. I want to throw out a couple of Twitter shout outs for people that have been pimping the show. First of all, anyone who's looking for new and interesting people to follow on Twitter, search hashtag mbmbam and then follow every single person that mentions the show. It's a community.

Some specific people. Of course, I want to thank Brento Floss. You follow Fridays every Friday. He's a great guy. Matthew Vos, talking about the week re-energizing us. Hilfins, H-I-L-T-H-E-N-S, big fan of the show. Atomic Fox, I want to throw that out just because he just realized that there's a connection

between Joystick and mbmbam. What is it? I don't know what it is, but he's keeping it to himself. Office of Nature, not only talked about mbmbam, but tried to get Son of Buzzo on board. I don't know. Whenever I see someone asking, yeah, you got to spread the word.

Got to get that follow up. Yeah, you got to jump them. You just got to hook them up. Go to our website, mbmbam.com or mbmbam.com. It's got all of our contact information. Email us at mbmbam.com. We read every single email. Even if we don't get to them on the show,

the number of emails is increasing exponentially every week. If we don't get to it, we apologize. We do read them and your problems are in our thoughts. If you email us about a listening party, make sure you put mbmbam listening party in the headlines so we can make sure to see it. We got some more voice mails this week. We did. We got a bunch.

They were a little long. They were in like the three minute range, most of them, which are cool to listen to, but hard to turn into a question on the show. If you can, try and keep it brief, unless you don't want a question on the show, unless you just want to chat to our voicemail. That number is 203 mbmbam1 or 203 mbmbam1.

That's it. That's it. Griffin, may I have that last question? Sure. This one was sent in by MrBaseball3030. Wow, that's already a really good name. Thank you, MrBaseball3030. Yahoo AnswersUserDeadBarbie asks, what are the benefits of circumcising a hamster?

What? I think that's obvious. I'm Justin McElroy. I'm Travis McElroy. I'm Griffin McElroy. This is gonna offend my brother and my brother, meaning kiss your dads or wear on the lips. You will never know me.

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