My Therapist Ghosted Me - MTGM EXTRA! "Does he fancy my best friend?"

Episode Date: June 14, 2023

It's EXTRA time.... Ageing gracefully, mentors and convincing a listener that her boyfriend probably isn't going to run off with her best friend!If you’d like to get in touch, you can send an email ...to hello@MTGMpod.comPlease review Global's Privacy Policy: https://global.com/legal/privacy-policy/MTGM is going on tour in Ireland & The UK! Remember to check the venue websites as well as Ticketmaster! For more information about Joanne's gigs, just visit www.joannemcnally.comThis episode contains explicit language and adult themes that may not be suitable for all listeners.Thank you!

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This is a Global Player Original Podcast. Hello and welcome to the bonus episode of My Therapist Goes to Room with me, Bo Williams and Joanne McNally. Joanne McNally, your loss is always my gain. Oh, I left my, well, we don't really know what they are. I left the growths That I wear At the end of my Ankles
Starting point is 00:00:27 In Vogue's room They are like a furry Slipper shoe From Is it What are they called Ninth level Level nine
Starting point is 00:00:33 Tower nine Tenth floor Close Tenth floor Tower nine Yeah How did you get back To your room
Starting point is 00:00:43 Just in your little Trotters Just your feet You went up You to your room Just in your little trotters Just your feet You went up You forgot your shoes Just ran out of my bare feet Amazing that she'd forget her shoes Actually I didn't even
Starting point is 00:00:53 It was only when I was standing in the lift Barefoot And bollock naked That I was like Where are my shoes? What have I done? What have I done? Where are my furry slipper shoes
Starting point is 00:01:02 That I I wear around Just to see people's reaction I love them It's like my clogs That everyone slags And that I didn't wear For a year
Starting point is 00:01:09 Because that woman Threw me such a filthy look And started laughing at me In a Soho farmhouse A random woman In a Soho farmhouse I could see her face
Starting point is 00:01:17 Like curl up And then she just started Laughing at my shoes And I thought I might pop these away For a while No Folk
Starting point is 00:01:24 We don't What She's a key bag it was like that time remember me and you and Ewan right me and you me and you and me and you and Ewan me and you and Ewan were out for dinner and I was wearing
Starting point is 00:01:37 I'm not going to lie it was a loud outfit it was like turquoise multicoloured leopard print jacket with matching they weren't actually matching They were a yellow leopard print Flare And the look Like she literally
Starting point is 00:01:49 I didn't know a nose Could curl Her nose curled up In disgust I know we're about Women supporting women But the second one of them Curls her nose up
Starting point is 00:01:57 We're like No no no no no It's Jo's birthday tomorrow Happy birthday Jo I heard It will have been and gone he went on the absolute the absolute piss last night
Starting point is 00:02:09 and I have to drive home with him tonight we're driving home from Cardiff after the show perfectly legally and perfectly safely can I say because that was last night
Starting point is 00:02:16 that's tonight different and Joe when you drive with Joe it's my second time driving with him now his car is like
Starting point is 00:02:24 it's basically like sitting in business class the seat goes the full way back Joe doesn't try to talk to you he does play the worst music and I just I just put my headphones in I said you know it's his car he can do what he likes I'm not going to get involved but like shocking shocking and I said to you you can listen to whatever you want and you said you're absolutely fine With your Classic rock radio station Is what you said You insisted on the Darkness album That you played on repeat
Starting point is 00:02:49 Is that what they're called? The Darkness? Just read the t-shirt there Yeah Oh my god yes I didn't even notice that You're obsessed with the Darkness I'm upset about something
Starting point is 00:02:59 Go on I've missed my chance with Harry Styles Yep What? Who's he banging now Listen You say this every time He's banging someone new
Starting point is 00:03:08 He's been banging He's been banging new people For the last 30 years Joanne Joanne He is in Dublin tonight I could have gone to Slane Casually bumped into him
Starting point is 00:03:18 And been like Right Harry Come on Let's go Come with mummy Come to mama You're a bit old for him I think
Starting point is 00:03:26 No No He likes older women I know but you're a bit too old That was my point Oh too old yeah Yeah we're ageing positively Anyway
Starting point is 00:03:34 Harry likes the older lady I hate that word lady That just makes you sound old Do you know what Jennifer Aniston One of my One of my faves was She's bringing out some sports thing or something.
Starting point is 00:03:45 So she's all over the place at the moment. And she was saying one of her pet peeves, one of her most irritating sayings is, you look well for your age. And I was like, Jennifer, I could not agree more. You just look well. She said, you just say you look great. You don't say you look well for your age
Starting point is 00:04:03 because it's like you're getting away with something. It's like you're tricking people Or There's an There's just an assumption That once you hit 35 Or whatever age it is It always changes
Starting point is 00:04:11 Depending on what age you are Yeah That you're like Oh god It's kind of shocking You don't look like shit I know Do you know what
Starting point is 00:04:17 Yes But you will I know But when Do you know what I swear And I'm not just making this up I feel very comfortable In the age that I'm at now.
Starting point is 00:04:27 I don't want to be in my 20s. I've done my 20s. I enjoyed my 20s. And I actually feel very comfortable. I never thought I would feel so comfortable at this age, but I do. I'm 40 now. What age are you, Vogue? Are you 38, 37? 38 in October. I'm happy about it though I am
Starting point is 00:04:46 I feel like I'm in a good spot Yeah That was what I was saying It was like That We don't Like we don't
Starting point is 00:04:54 Lie about our age We don't fudge our age We're proud No we are And also we're fucking young Like this Jennifer's at a different stage Because she's
Starting point is 00:05:01 What is she Jo? Can you check? I was doing I was doing a TV show with it's different when you're it's different when you're under 40
Starting point is 00:05:08 like and you're like oh I feel good about my age or even 40 like I feel good about my age but she feels like she's literally coming to the end of her Hollywood chapter
Starting point is 00:05:14 she's 54 she's 54 so I think hitting your 50s is a different beast again then it's like oh now you're really
Starting point is 00:05:22 getting away with something do you know what I mean what I will say like I know when somebody very close to me turned 70 not my mum someone else they cried before their 70th birthday only because they were they were they're starting to get scared like that that time is coming closer to an end and I can understand that but like I was I did a radio show sorry today with them with a 90 year old woman who was on tour selling her fifth book she's doing all these book talks she's an actress she is like
Starting point is 00:05:52 so intelligent she was she's so glamorous she was really really cool yeah you see it's always it's always deadly when you meet women like that who you're like you can kind of look up to yeah or just look at and be like wow they're doing a really good job of just being alive and yeah she did say we were successful and being cool and just enjoying their fucking lives you know she was saying though she was like uh because we were talking about like best friends and something she was like well most of my friends are dead i was like oh god no, please don't start this with me. There's a, there's a woman on Insta and I still, to this day, I don't know if she's real or fake. Let me try and find her.
Starting point is 00:06:33 Grandma Droniak. I'm probably not pronouncing that correctly. Grandma Droniak. She's, I'm a celebrity. This is her bio. She's 1.3 million followers. Her bio is, I'm a celebrity and a 93 year old grandma. Yes, I can be her grandma too
Starting point is 00:06:45 contact Kevin Draniak for business inquiries but her videos are like get ready with me for the grave and she's like putting on makeup
Starting point is 00:06:53 and everything like I honestly like Grandma Draniak I don't mean to upset you but I can't tell if she's
Starting point is 00:07:00 if she if I don't know I don't want to speak out of turn, but I can't tell if she's, if she knows exactly what she's doing or not. Oh my God, I'm following her right now. I don't mean to insult her,
Starting point is 00:07:12 but she's gas is all I would say. She's amazing. I just see a picture of, she's pulling a knife out of her bag and one of the things, what the hell? Oh yeah. Here's what's in my bag. Stop asking.
Starting point is 00:07:23 A calculator. She's like, I've been single for decades. I think that's why I look my bag. Stop asking. A calculator. She's like, I've been single for decades. I think that's why I look so good. So she takes TikTok trends and then she kind of acts them out on her own page. And then she films herself dancing
Starting point is 00:07:34 and just screaming, Slay Queen, slay. Do you remember Irish Apple? Like she's still alive, but like she did a collab with H&M. She has her own like rug range and she is so cool like I
Starting point is 00:07:46 like and I think she's in her 90s as well she's amazing see she's actually I would say she's cooler than us we need more women like that they're out there
Starting point is 00:07:54 I just need to find them I was reading an article the other day about it was talking about the importance of intergenerational friendships for women so different women
Starting point is 00:08:01 being friends with different generations which is what Vogue thinks me and her are but genuinely genuinely intergenerational friendships like I don't have any female friends in their 60s like I've my mom and her sisters and stuff but it's not the same thing do you know what I mean I'm not like best friends with you see I women significantly younger women significantly older and I feel like I'm lacking that a bit I feel like I am like auntie Jean is one of my best friends
Starting point is 00:08:25 she comes on all of our holidays with us my Auntie Naomi. That's true you have Gina, yeah you do. Naomi is one of my really good friends, I would speak to her a lot, she's my Auntie Anyway, I just think, I think that's why people have mentors in certain industries so they can enjoy the wisdom of people who've been around longer than them
Starting point is 00:08:41 and I'd love it in friendships. I'd actually love I'd love a female mentor a female mentor I have a male one Des Bishop is kind of my male mentor really okay
Starting point is 00:08:51 I know what you're asking here I would like to be I will be your female mentor thank you so much sorry so Dame it was Dame Sheila Hancock
Starting point is 00:09:05 Who was 90 She would be an amazing mentor If you got Do you know her Jo? Yeah she's an icon She can be yours Yeah I'll have her I'd love
Starting point is 00:09:13 I would love I mean Joan Rivers Would be the ideal mentor Oh yeah Sadly I know Sadly those days are gone But An older female comedian
Starting point is 00:09:22 Would be amazing Yeah Like who? You know? I don't know. Like I want the comedian from Hacks but she's not,
Starting point is 00:09:31 she's fictional sadly. Well that won't really work. I know but she would be ideal. I think she's kind of based on Joan Rivers but anyone. Like you know
Starting point is 00:09:39 like someone just I just want I'd love to be in the in the bosom of an older female performer Judy Garland that kind of thing you're going for all the dead ones though
Starting point is 00:09:50 not helpful mother of god I'm ahead of my time no I'm behind my time will we do some listener emails sure Bette Midler
Starting point is 00:10:04 I'd have Bette share Will we do some listener emails? Sure. Okay. Bat Middler. I'd have Bat. Oh, she, yeah, yeah. I'd say share. Share. Share. Imagine having share. Folk, Joanne, please help.
Starting point is 00:10:25 Of course. I've got a massive fear at the moment and it's eating me alive. I'm going between being absolutely certain and then doubting myself, wondering why I'm like this. Sounds like somebody I know. For the last two weeks, I've been getting this feeling
Starting point is 00:10:37 that my boyfriend has a thing for my best friend. Oh no. I've been with him for a year or so and he's kind Loving and attentive But we went out With all my friends A couple of weeks ago
Starting point is 00:10:49 And my boyfriend Spent a lot of the evening Talking to my best friend I didn't mind And I was glad To chat to everyone else Since then A few comments he's made
Starting point is 00:10:58 Have had me thinking That he's got her on his mind He said that she's Really clever And they chatted about Loads of stuff That don't interest me at all. He asked how long ago her relationship ended.
Starting point is 00:11:10 I don't think that she's leading him on at all. I'm just sure it's all in his own mind. But I keep going over it. And even when we have sex, it just keeps flashing in my mind. Oh, dear. Ah, is my boyfriend going to shag my best friend and ruin my life? Hell, no. No. Spenny is obsessed
Starting point is 00:11:26 with Joanne I was just about to say I don't want to embarrass Alan but if he mentions Vogue one more time I'm like
Starting point is 00:11:34 Alan like it's it never stops when you come on the phone what does Vogue think about that what does Vogue think about that Joanne what does Vogue
Starting point is 00:11:42 if we have a fight I bet you Vogue would agree with me it's just constant and you know on Insta when there's like a you know the most watched
Starting point is 00:11:48 people it's usually I'm the first video and Vogue's always the second video he is bat in to Vogue well when I call you or if you're
Starting point is 00:11:57 on the phone or something and Spenny hears your voice his whole face lights up and he just looks everywhere for you he's like a little
Starting point is 00:12:03 dog he's very cute so obsessed do you know what I think it is and this is probably The whole face lights up And he just looks everywhere for you He's like a little dog He's very cute So obsessed Do you know what I think it is And this is probably sexist and stereotypical But fuck it we're in it now Go on We've never been one to ignore a stereotype
Starting point is 00:12:16 Don't shy away Don't shy away from the obvious Is that men From my experience Don't attack me, don't have a lot of female friends. Yeah. So when they get a woman
Starting point is 00:12:29 in their life by default, which is usually through their girlfriend, who they spend a lot of time with and they get on with, they have it like what we would call a, it's platonic,
Starting point is 00:12:39 but they just are very, they just are kind of drawn to them because it's something new for them. Yeah. They're allowed to spend time with this other woman. It's not sexual. They get to know each other, have a laugh. They get on.
Starting point is 00:12:50 They have good conversations. But it's not, they're not going to ride. It's just a mutual appreciation. Yeah. Because like I say, they don't, men, well, the men that I know anyway, their friendships would be predominantly with other men. Yeah. That's all it is. I predominantly with other men yeah that's all it is I'm telling you now
Starting point is 00:13:07 that's all it is yeah I would not be worried about that at all and I kind of love that Fanny likes you so much it's a nice thing to have your boyfriend like your friends
Starting point is 00:13:14 and it's nice that Alan likes you too I do think it is nice I tease him about it tell him I said I miss him I will yeah it's like
Starting point is 00:13:26 and sometimes why are you hanging out for Fogg's insta stories she's just a good friend I just really admire her well sometimes okay
Starting point is 00:13:34 when I'm tired Joanne takes the reins with Spenna and she sorts him out for me that's what friends do yes and also
Starting point is 00:13:42 you're like A it's not it's not sexual on his part like I say it's just a kind of
Starting point is 00:13:47 a respect or it's a new interest she's a bit she's got there's a bit of novelty there because it's a new
Starting point is 00:13:53 woman in his life but it's not sexual I would I would put my well not my life not my life I wouldn't put my life let's be realistic here
Starting point is 00:14:02 I do think what you're saying is true because even spending with Amber like he's very close with her Amber's a lesbian
Starting point is 00:14:08 she's definitely not going to go there yeah it's not it's a very Alan and Amber get on like a bloody house on fire
Starting point is 00:14:15 oh my god he's like is Amber going to be there is Amber going to be there is Amber going to be there she's dead is he going to shoot me or Amber
Starting point is 00:14:22 he has to choose one he'd shoot Amber wouldn't he he'd shoot Amber, yeah. Yeah, okay. That's okay. One shot's up. Because at least he can maybe hook up with you.
Starting point is 00:14:29 Do you know what I mean? You know. You know what I mean? So don't worry. We don't think your best friend and your boyfriend are going to get together. I'd just be happy that they're friends. Exactly. It's nice that they get on.
Starting point is 00:14:43 Yeah. Yeah. Because it'd be worse if you have one of those boyfriends who thinks all your friends are a dick and then you won't go anywhere and blah, blah, blah. You know, we've all had them. Yeah. They're actually way worse. Forgot about that.
Starting point is 00:14:54 They are. I'd rather Alan rode Vogue than wouldn't be in a room with her, to be honest. It would make socialising way easier if they just did it behind my back and I didn't know and he was always just pleased to see her. Instead of being like, I'm not going to Vogue's there. I'm like, fuck's sake. Vogue's everywhere with me.
Starting point is 00:15:10 Come on. Come on, we're joined together. We have started morphing into each other. We were going through the airport the other day. Same sunglasses, same handbag. Yeah, I know. It's cute. It's cute.
Starting point is 00:15:20 And I'm cutting my hair into a blonde bob next week. I'm not even joking. Yeah. It's getting single white female now Vogue and who also to top it all off
Starting point is 00:15:29 someone lost their passport and it wasn't me oh wow wow it's telltales on me there I was like oh I was like
Starting point is 00:15:37 oh my god Vogue she was like oh my god my passport we were on the way to the airport to fly from Edinburgh to Cardiff and she's like oh my god I have no passport and I was like
Starting point is 00:15:43 I'm so proud of you I was there looking this is beautiful I was looking up trains it was going to take me seven hours to get there on a train and then
Starting point is 00:15:52 luckily I had four bank cards and I had a I counted 19 she whipped out 19 bank cards on the counter even your man
Starting point is 00:16:00 in the high vids was like whoa all these bank cards I was like please It's me It's me Yeah Six grand in cash
Starting point is 00:16:09 Just out of her wallet She's like fuck They let her on Yeah so I got on I got on I did get on thankfully I don't know how that happened To be fair
Starting point is 00:16:17 I did have a copy Of my driver's license And a copy of my passport So Because it was domestic I don't think it matters Let's not name the airline Just in case
Starting point is 00:16:25 it was illegal but they were very kind to us and well Vogue and they let her on yeah that's it for the bonus episode this week we shall see you
Starting point is 00:16:37 Friday yes Thank you.

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