My Therapist Ghosted Me - MTGM EXTRA! "The ride of my life..."
Episode Date: April 12, 2023This week, there's more to learn about crying on a plane, Vogue challenges Joanne to a 'How well do you know your bestie" quiz and an absolute adonis has got back in touch with a listener... If you’...d like to get in touch, you can send an email to hello@MTGMpod.comPlease review Global's Privacy Policy: https://global.com/legal/privacy-policy/MTGM is going on tour in Ireland & The UK! Remember to check the venue websites as well as Ticketmaster! For more information about Joanne's gigs, just visit www.joannemcnally.comThank you!
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This is a Global Player original podcast.
Hello and welcome to the bonus episode of My Therapist Ghosted Me with me, Vogue Williams,
Joanne McNally and Pod Prod Joe.
That's your Insta handle, isn't it?
Jo, are you watching?
Jo, welcome.
Have you watched Married at First Outs?
No. I can't get her off this
It's a severe addiction
Would you think about getting married yourself Joe
Would you get married yourself
He is married he had his wedding last year
What
Well I wouldn't know because we weren't invited
You dick
No we were invited
I did I invited you on the podcast
When you'd already said you definitely wouldn invited I did I invited you on the podcast When you'd already said
You didn't
You definitely wouldn't come
So I invited you as a courtesy
Knowing that you wouldn't come
I think Imo
My producer
And my other god
I think Imo
Did the same thing there
But like
Her wedding's in Sicily
And I've actually
Never been to Sicily
And I thought
That might be a nice way
To see Sicily
And go there
And she's kind
I think she's taken it back That I've said yes You're not actually Going I thought that might be a nice way to see Sicily and go there. And she's kind, I think she's taken it back
that I've said yes.
You're not actually going to go, are you?
You don't go to anything.
No, I don't like going to things.
You're dead right, Joanne.
Do you know what I did though?
I went for dinner last night
and I shocked myself.
I went for dinner.
I wasn't happy about it.
And do you know what?
Had a good time.
I leave my house, right?
I swear to God.
I look at my watch and I'm like,
right, two hours and I can go back home. All I want to do is go home. I'm like, even if I'm sitting, if I'm doing a job and I swear to God I look at my watch and I'm like right two hours and I can go back home.
All I want to do is go home.
I'm like
even if I'm sitting
if I'm doing a job
that I really love
I'm like I wonder when I can go home.
I cannot help it.
I know.
I just want to go home
and chill and sit
and just be with my kids.
As soon as I get home
I'm like fuck them
their hard work
I'm leaving.
It's just an age thing I think.
It really is.
Like there was a time
Where I would leave my house
On a Friday
And I'd be like
If I saw it by Sunday
I'd be disappointed
I know
Like I just never wanted
To be home
I hated it
I just wanted to be out
With my friends
All the time
All the time
Licking booze
Off the ground
At some club
That's all I wanted
Like I
Scrounging money together
To be able to buy
Absolutely anything
Like now Crawling across the ground Of a cloakroom Somewhere in town Like I'm at the age scrounging money together to be able to buy absolutely anything like now I
crawling across the ground
of a cloak room
somewhere in town
like
I'm at the age
in life where
I've brought
10 normal tea bags
and 10 decaf tea bags
away with me
for 10 days
like that's the stage
of life I'm at
sorry that's a lot Liam
that's too much Vogue
I don't
do you know what's too much
that I forgot
a big giant mug
because I've only got
shitty little mugs here
to go on the hunt
for a mug today
yeah I'm going
I'm going mug shopping today
cut that
what if you want to do
a show in Portugal
you just fucking rinse them
porch loves us
okay
she will divorce you
this is why she doesn't
talk to me for most of the week
I can't I can't.
I can't write the abbreviations.
Okay, you and Svenny have a great time.
You think I abbreviate.
He'll be having a go for some high nose.
High nose before you know it.
Do you want to do a quick quiz that I found online or no?
Sure.
Okay.
How well do you know your bestie?
How does your partner
like their eggs cooked
Joanne likes hers
rock solid
tennis balls
and it's
it's really hard to get
because some chefs
just
oh my god
speaking of chefs
have you seen the menu
the film
no
Spenny said it was great
though he watched it
it is
it's right up my alley
now I have to say
oh god I'm gonna have to watch that
is it a movie
or a TV show
it's a film
it's like the modern
it's like a modern version
of the Wicker Man
it's
so good
so good
I haven't seen the Wicker Man either
that's terrible
I think about it
that's a really good sign
of a film
when you think about it
in your spare time
like I've been thinking
about it ever since
Ralph Fiennes is in it
your man from Little Boy with Hugh grant is in it it's brilliant okay well we'll watch
that now how do i like my eggs cooked oh sorry because the menu sorry it's it's like a horror
about food but um i like mine rock hard i don't like any goopy gloopy i don't like any goopy, gloopy. I don't like any wet food. No, but how do I like mine?
Oh, sorry, sorry, sorry.
It's about folk.
You like yours, I would say medium.
I would say you like a bit of gloop, but not a lot of gloop.
I don't like the white, snotty bit on top, but I like the runny egg.
Yes.
How frequently would your partner ideally like to be having sex?
Once a year, New Year's Eve.
I got a review in
Once every two weeks.
Once every two weeks.
They were really nice.
They gave me a really nice review
but they're like,
she's so sex positive
and I was like,
I'm absolutely not.
Beyond sex negative.
We are not sex negative No we're not
If it was once every two weeks
We would be very sex positive
I actually love riding
I will say
And I
I do
I think I'm
I think I'm pretty
Good at it
When I
When I
When I
Pay attention
When you put the real effort in
Yeah
Yeah
When I concentrate
Yeah
When I concentrate
Yeah exactly
And if I've had a couple
of drinks even better i'm really good then sorry to see stormy daniels now all the donald trump
stuff she did a tweet she was like people are calling me a but i'd rather be under my man than
under arrest and i was like boom holla honey do you reckon he's gonna go to jail clap clap clap
no he won't go to jail he won't go to jail.
He won't go to jail, no.
It'll take years
and like, if anything,
because it's not a violent crime.
So,
I've done my research on this.
He won't go to jail.
At the most,
he'll get a fine
in 20 years time.
He won't.
And he's also doing it.
He could,
apparently he was offered
the chance to zoom in for that.
And he decided not to because he wants, he wants the pantomime of it. He's asking in for that and he decided not to
because he wants
he wants the pantomime of it
and he's asking everyone
for money and all
do you know what I mean
it's
yeah
no he's not going to
he's a strange
he's a strange man though
isn't he a strange
strange man
he's a proper narcissist
and I know we all call
we throw that term around
so easily
but he actually is
100%
he could even be considered
sociopathic
Like he could
I would think so
I would think so
Okay well we do some emails
Okay
I'll write to my mum
Now what are we doing
Let me get the emails
My mum
I rang my mum
It was the most
Mother answer
Rang my mum
And
I don't really
You know
Vogue knows
I'm a bit of a
Lone wolf
She's a phone dodger
I don't really
Ring anyone
Now to be fair
Joanne
I always get you
When I want you
You do
You do
You do in fairness
I love chatting to you
No offence to my mum
But like
I like chatting to Vogue
And usually it's kind of
A work thing
So I'll answer
But I rang my mum
And she was like
Well hello
I've the jacket
on me on the way to the solicitors
to cut you out of the will
I was like oh my god
Irish
mother is responsible to a found
will I take the jacket
off
your mum is actually gas
I loved her I finally met her I felt like
I was meeting my in-laws
She's got a good sense of humor
In fairness to her
I was on the way
Out the door
To cut you out
Of the way
Cut me out of the way
I'm good for half a water
For the crystal glass set
Go on
Cut me out
Okay
Here is your
List of emails
The ride of my life
Text me
The mile cry club
Breast pump shaming
And that's it
I'll take mile high club
Please for 28 points
Do you know what
Speaking of the mile high club
Right
Spenny and I
Had thought about that
And I was like
I don't want to
Sorry Vagabond
It was the mile cry club
No
Yeah I know
Well I'm talking about
The mile high club Oh sorry So are you in it Is anyone a member here I was like, I don't want to. Sorry, Vagabond, it was the Mile Cry Club. No? Yeah, I know. Well, I'm talking about the Mile High Club.
Oh, sorry.
So are you in it?
Is anyone a member here?
No.
Why would you be?
No, I don't want to go into a smelly toilet box to have sex.
Why would you?
Why the fuck?
Like, unless it was a private plan, I would die of shame coming out.
I would die.
I wouldn't.
I'd never recover.
Do you know what as well?
I don't like the smell in there
I try to like cover my face
With something I'm wearing
When I'm in there
No
You're wrong
I've never smelled anything
In an airplane toilet
Because remember
I was saying
It gets shot out
From the
From the ass of the plane
And then it kills people
And feels
It's not
Okay do you want
Why don't
It doesn't
Okay
No
I'm sorry
That is not how cholera started.
It just doesn't.
It doesn't.
It didn't start from being something shot out of a plane.
Whatever.
The point is, there's no odor in there because it's so, the flush is so aggressive.
That's bullshit, Joanne.
Maybe I have a sensitive shrown, but I smell not nice things in the toilet, and that's
why I try to cover my face with it.
Anyway. Hi, girls why I try to cover my face with it. Anyway.
Hi girls and Joe.
I've just listened to the pod
and I heard Joanne talking about crying on planes
and thought you might find this interesting.
I too have found myself weeping mid-air,
mostly while watching movies.
It happens regardless of whether it's happy, sad or funny.
And yes, usually a gin or a wine is hard,
but I'm not a crier and see it as myself as very emotionally stable.
Turns out crying on planes is a thing.
The mild cry club is actually a legit phenomenon.
No.
Yes, it's something to do with the altitude, lack of oxygen, dry air,
the stress of travelling.
That's interesting now.
I would say, like, look,'t know i'm not i'm not a
scientist or a pilot but i would say it's to do with the gin no i would say do you know what i
would say that's what i would say i'm not a gin drinker so i don't know what it feels like to
to have one of like i'm a vodka girl and i feel like vodka just brings you up like if i have a
drink on a plane i feel sorry for someone sitting
beside me because it's like
I want to talk to them then and then the earphones
are coming out and they're like oh god she's
taking out the earphones and like it's like so
so are you going far
I know so that's why I don't drink
on a plane I don't want to upset anyone
so I just don't drink
I saw this video going around online
where this guy
found a photo of a pilot
but like kind of like a really sexy pilot
who was kind of taking his top off.
And then he
screen grabbed it and captioned it going
just about to take off
and then airdropped it to everyone on the plane
and then
yeah, it was
like a prank.
Like a little April Fools prank.
I can't tell you how much I love doing pranks on people. Yeah it was Like a prank Like a little April Fools prank But you love that
I can't tell you
I can't tell you how much
I love doing pranks on people
And then the pilot
Came across the tannoy
And he was like
That is not me
Because it was like
Yeah yeah yeah
He was like
I don't know who
Sent him that photo
Because your man
The pilot had like
A drink in his hand
And his top off
And he was like
Can't wait to fly
Fly this plane baby
And then like
Everyone's like
Sorry what He's like Sorry what
He's like
That is not me
I don't look like that
That is not me
I love it
I once pranked my dad
I'm not going to drive you
To a sexy mountain
Go on what
I pranked my dad
Once and I rang him
And I pretended to cry
And I told him
I'd been thrown out of school
And everything like that
No no that wasn't the one
No it's a different one
I was in his house
And I told him
His house had been robbed
Yeah yeah That did happen twice I told him His house had been robbed Yeah yeah
That did happen twice
I told him his house
Had been robbed
And he started going mental
On the phone
I was like dad
You have to come back
Your house has been robbed
I left the door open
And everything
And I was literally like
Wait
Burst through the door
No wonder your dad's died
It's like he's like
I can't fucking deal
With this shit anymore This is just I can't like he's like I can't fucking deal With this shit anymore
This is just
I can't stand
I can't
I can't live through
Another April Fools
That's what your dad said
Hi girls
And Jo
Last night I received
A text from the ride of my life.
We last hooked up pre...
Oh my God, that's good.
We last hooked up pre-pandemic.
Ooh.
Stunning.
This man is a Greek god and I'm a complete nerd.
Oh, interesting.
I managed to sway him into an FWB type situation for six months.
What does that mean?
Friends with benefits.
Sorry, Jo Watson.
Friends with benefits.
Friends with benefits.
But he never...
I know.
God.
He never wanted to progress more than a regular shag.
It's been over two years since we last spoke, smoked.
Sorry, Joanne's not been with me. It's been over two years. Since we ran through a bag of Rothmans together. Smoked Sorry she winds up
With me
Since we ran through
A bag of Rothmans together
And here we are
Out of nowhere
He texts me last night
Asking for a catch up
We spoke on the phone
For two hours
Oh wow
Which we never did before
He made numerous references
To be with someone like me
And I don't know what to make in it
It's escalating
He's asked me to go to the lakes with him
Where's the lakes?
That sounds fancy
Is that the district?
Yeah that's a Protestant thing
I've heard of the lakes
There's two
What?
Is it the lakes?
It's not a Catholic
It is
Might be the Italian leg.
Sorry.
Back on topic.
There's two things
to do with that, right?
I think that he possibly
wants something more
because he's realised
that you were actually amazing.
Maybe he started going out
with loads of other people
that were crap
and he thought
that she's amazing.
And even if it's not that,
you're still getting to go back
and have the ride of your life.
Go and do it.
Yeah, I agree.
But also don't 100% agree.
Okay.
I don't think, I don't know.
I don't think anyone changes really.
What I would say is.
Maybe his situation has changed that now he actually wants to be in a relationship.
Yeah, maybe.
Maybe.
I just think.
No, sorry.
The main takeaway is when the ride is that good, it's impossible to get out of that situation.
It's impossible.
I've had that with people before and you're like, I cannot turn this down.
It's impossible.
It's like turning down a free Concord to LA.
You're like, you're not going to do it.
You're not going to turn it down.
I'm there.
I'm trying to think of somebody that like
Digmatised as they say
That I'd go back to
Digmatised
You're hypnotised by the dick
It's impossible, it's so hard to get out of it
Even though outside of the writing
You're crying constantly
But like when the writing happens it's so
Do you know what though I will say
I was trying to think back there to think of like oh who
would who have I been dignitized by
as you say
and I don't know like I feel like when
I leave a relationship I kind of forget about it
then I forget but then you haven't been
dignitized well it's
really good I have to say well there you go you married
you married your dick
hypnotist
your dickmatist. Your dickmatist.
Joe Watson.
I'm glad he never listens to this pod.
He'd be so mad about himself listening to this.
Oh my God, if he ever listens to this.
No, but I've had a couple of situations like that
where you're like,
this can't work in the day to day.
But my God, like,
how do I get out of this?
I just only remember, I can really remember the shite ones, you know? Yeah, I get out of this I just only remember
like I can really remember
the shite ones
you know
yeah I had one of them too
but then we hired him
and it's
he's a shit rival
give him a job
there it is
you're welcome Joseph
he must be good at something
yeah
we're like
he's so shit in the sack
put him on the mic
oh he's not that bad actually
this sounds like something
like this sounds very immature but like have you's not that bad actually this sounds like something like
this sounds very immature
but like
have you ever had a bad ride
and you're just like
not counting that
I'm not counting that
that's not a person
I'm not counting that ride
as a real ride
and on that note
we would like to say
thank you very much
for listening
to the bonus episode
of My Therapist Ghosted Me. Bye.