My Therapist Ghosted Me - MTGM EXTRA! "Who cares? We were into it."

Episode Date: March 13, 2024

This week, as the EXTRA was recorded on Monday morning, Joanne accidentally stayed up all night watching The Oscars. Meanwhile, Vogue gives her views on sexting and why she can't be bothered.If you’d like to get in touch, you can send an email to [e-mail] review Global's Privacy Policy: https://global.com/legal/privacy-policy/For merch, tour dates and more visit: www.mytherapistghostedme.comFor more information about Joanne's gigs, just visit www.joannemcnally.comThis episode contains explicit language and adult themes that may not be suitable for all listeners.Thank you!

This is a Global Player Original Podcast. Hello and welcome to the bonus episode of My Therapist Goes With Me with me, Vogue Williams, and... I'm Joanne McNally. Good morning. Do you want us to do an early record? I wouldn't mind because obviously I'm a grown woman with bills to pay

but I was up all night watching the Oscars by accident. Oh brilliant. I was up till 5am Hollywood time. I'm on Hollywood time. You watched the whole thing.

I don't even think the people who go to the Oscars watch it yeah no I didn't watch that I dipped in and dipped out basically I was up late I was working on something else and then it like

obviously the Oscars was on kind of in the background and then I got very into it indeed I've never given a shit about the Oscars to be honest I always think it's very boring

but they've turned it around this year this is the best year yet it's the only one I've watched, so obviously I'm biased. It was so good. Oh my God, I know. Who won?

Killian won. Oh, that's good news. Oh my God, that's great. First Irish person to ever win Best Actor in the Oscars, which is, to me, completely mind- Yeah, because we're so good at that stuff. That's like our thing.

What about Daniel Day-Lewis has he never won anything English born what Killian's the OG oh my goodness Daniel's a hybrid Killian's oh I never knew that

best actress Emma Stone Joanne you watched the whole Oscars what it was it was a real feel well it was that

or write the book so obviously I just watched the Oscars. Excuse me, can I just say Joanne read me only a tiny bit of her book yesterday. Like a tiny bit and I was very impressed. I thought about it after you left and everything. That's how impressed I was. That's amazing.

Thank you. You're welcome. What an impact those seven lines had. Listen, I'm proud of you whatever however many that's it your book's finished she did a

paragraph and it's finished I'm just gonna write a meme I thought I'll just write a meme instead the book seems like a huge

commitment quote would be surely enough to get me through at this stage I agree it's as good as that fine Brenda Fricker won

best supporting actress for My Left Foot in 1990. I thought you were saying now. I was like, what has she done recently? No, no, no, no. I just don't think, I just don't want Brenda to be ignored in the kind of fanfare

around Cillian. But yeah, Cillian won Best Actor. And I will say it was emotional. It really was. And I felt like everyone was really happy for him, but I could just be projecting. But it I felt like everyone was really happy for him but I could just be projecting but it felt like the other winners were happy for him I guess they're actors they can pretend but and he looked really I've never seen Cillian look happy obviously

it's Cillian Murphy he's always kind of you know he's quite dour like his hell he's an actor that's what they're like well they're not actually I actually I genuinely I think I think with Cillian Murphy though I think he just hates

all of that bullshit I think he literally just despises it and some people some people can play the game and he just doesn't want to be part of the game and now he's one best actor

so we can look forward to him also quitting acting altogether like Daniel Day-Lewis because he'll hate everything that comes around it. Like he just wants to be left alone and quirk. Well he looked pretty pleased last night now.

I will say he looked chuffed. And he looked genuinely chuffed. He was, you could tell, he kind of was chuffed. Like he'd, you know, come first in something, which he has. I'm going to look at this now to see if there is really. Joanne, he doesn't look that happy. Come on, I'm looking at the pictures here

yeah he is he is surprised okay fair enough yeah and then he said Gairdh Míle maith agat and they left it in that's Panks in Irish Joe we're fluent in that Joe just in case anyone asks

yeah it's going to take a bit of practice that one I'm not going to say it now because I don't want to embarrass myself did you see don't say it now it's none of your business it's a secret code

that you have no access to did you see me about are fluent in it. It's none of your business. It's a secret code that you have no access to. Did you see? But me and Bob are fluent in it just so you know that. When you're not around we speak that to each other. We studied it for 15 years

and we bet you about you behind your back in Irish. I mean it's not even a studying it just comes to us naturally. We don't have to study it really. We're just born with it in the tongue.

We all know that. What was I going to say to you oh there was something on TV TV Irish TV recently debating about like

not wasting any money on the Irish language and I just think that that is so like but it was in Ireland and some Irish people were saying yeah don't

and it's like no that is like our that's our national language it's actually having a research I love it I love when and what's your man Paul Maskell fluent Irish That is like our, that's our national language. It's actually having a research. I love it. I love when, and what's your man,

Paul Meskell, fluent Irish? He is, yeah. Well, he can say that. How the fuck are we supposed to know? Do you know what I mean? Because, he could be talking all sorts of shite.

We're like, ah, yeah. It's the performance of the evening. Ryan Gosling performed I'm Just Can and it's the best live performance at an Oscars

since was it was the Oscars Will Slip Will Slip Will Slip what's his name Will Smith

Will Slap Will Slap that was two years ago he's been banned for two years yeah two no I think he's banned for longer

no he's banned for ten but this is his this is second year you have to google him doing I'm Just Ken and he sang it live like

did he he sang it live and then Slash came out and started doing guitar with them it was Mark Ronson was doing it with them it was

unbelievable it was like I don't know it should have won an Oscar itself that's when you realise like you really you really haven't made it when you see things like that it's like I don't know it should have won an Oscar itself that's when you realise like you really you really haven't made it when you see things

like that it's like wow people are so far ahead well I did think that I was like Ryan is sitting front row at the Oscars in a head to toe pink

bejazzled suit and he has the performance of the evening and I just thought Ryan's made it really yeah Ryan

Ryan has definitely made it he kind of owns the Oscars now you know he kind of owns it like he's just rocking around I'd say he's accessed all areas he can do what he wants everyone knows him by name

and he's singing live is there nothing that man can't do like and he's beautiful and he's I did and his wife's arrived

his wife's arrived I know His wife's a ride. I know, I'm sorry, but she is a ride. Why are you bringing her up? They don't even seem that close to me, honestly. We never see them together, actually. Maybe they're not even together.

She didn't go to the Oscars. Did she? No, she didn't. I did see a few, like, a few not Ryan Gosling's at the Oscars where I was just like,

because obviously I was looking at the Daily Mail before I fell asleep at half nine. And the first people arrive. So they get photographed and the picture lands. But like, I mean, I wouldn't,

I don't know how they got a ticket. They must've purchased one. Some people. Go on. Well, there's a lot of people allowed to go to the Oscars. I don't want to shade anyone like by name, but there was just,

I was just surprised. I thought it was like a tougher guest list to get in on, you know? Got it. Yeah, I know. Now I want to know who you're talking about, but obviously we'll talk about that in Irish later. Ask her again. Beep that out. But what was she doing there? Seriously, come on.

Come the fuck on. I was like, what? Doesn't make sense. I'll have to google her now hold on we can't even get a ticket to Burberry and she's going to the Oscars

I was when I was watching it last night I was thinking me and Vogue snubbed again yeah absolutely but that is something

we would attend just to put that out there wouldn't we we'd go to the Oscars wouldn't we 100% not for Ladbible or whatever no offence Vogue but like we want Oscars wouldn't we 100% not for Ladbible or whatever no offence vote

but like we want to be in it listen I'd go for Ladbible come on yes that would I hear you once I'm around I was just about to say as well I kind of got invited to the Oscars to the BAFTAs

and like when I say kind of like I was just stood outside on a red carpet screaming at celebrities who then ignored me and I didn't get to go in yeah no no

I'd go and watch it at home like the rest of you. I can't bear Vox Pops. I'm too self-conscious. I can't do them. But I want to be in. I want to be inside. Listen, as always, I will take any crust I'm given. So I will do Vox Pops and I will not be.

I like that. I'm telling you, you won't have fun in there. There was a TikTok going around that was very funny. It was an Irish girl and she was doing, she was like, please stop the embarrassing interviews

and she was doing impersonations of Irish people on the red carpets trying to interview Irish actors. And they're like, hey Barry, do you drink flat seven up when you're sick, do you? Do you love a chicken fillet roll, do you?

I did a whole Irish quiz and the Irish people loved it on the red carpet. Oh my God. Yeah. Thank you very much. It might have been aimed at you in hindsight. And actually, that was a great question. No, I don't drink flat 7-up when I'm sick. Not anymore.

It never worked. It tastes like shit and I'd rather fizzy ones. They're like, what's your favourite bus route? It was just like you know it gets very Irish but I was actually listening to this article

the other day about the Oscars and it's really interesting and this year I think went back but they were talking about the kind of the history of the

red carpet questions and how they've gotten to the point where the actors are now dicks about them and the people asking the questions don't even want to

ask them anymore and it's just gotten real like now I think Reese Witherspoon was like don't ask want to ask them anymore and it's just gotten real like now I think Reese Witherspoon was like don't ask me who I'm wearing like it demeans me you know I'm more than that they're like well what the fuck are we supposed to ask you like what do you want and I don't give a fuck who you're wearing either

by the way yeah no give a shit who you're wearing get over yourself yeah get lost and I haven't even seen your film I had to google it right I'm like, Rhys, I saw that dress on ASOS, okay, on sale. So you're wearing ASOS, babe.

Yeah. Get over yourself. Although you do a lot for women in the industry. Thank you. Supposing now, was I telling you about that thing about people who are meant

to be nice to work with and she's meant to be extremely nice to work with. Yeah. And Jennifer Aniston, very nice to work with. Professional. Professional Jennifer Aniston, very nice to work with. Professional. Southern bow.

She's got that whole yes ma'am thing going on, doesn't she? Yeah. And the Kardashians, meant to be nice to work with as well, but imagine all the free shit you get off them. I'd be thrilled.

When I was about to fall asleep and I was just buzzing from my Oscars buzz and feeling very patriotic like, oh! Also, and I know this is turning into a bit of a nationalist episode, BBC News,

straight out, Irish actor, Cillian Murphy, I couldn't believe it. That's never heard of. It's always British. Like whenever we do anything they want us to be British.

Whenever we do good, they want us to be British whenever we do something good they want us to be British when we do something embarrassing they don't want anything to do with us so it's kind of this ongoing thing but sometimes

we should just start sealing the Brits let's just start sealing the Brits that we want Peter Kay Irish comedian Michael McIntyre Irish comedian

who else would we take actually Emma Bunton Mel B well Mel B as well and Victoria Beckham and Dave Beckham would we take Lorraine Kelly would we take actually Emma Bunton Mel B well Mel B as well and Victoria Beckham would we take Lorraine Kelly

would we take her I'd take her well Lorraine Kelly is Scottish I thought we weren't stealing from the Scots Scotland are pretty fun we said British

you probably won't get her okay British we said British no we'll take her we're taking her they can have Nicola Sturgeon we'll just take

who else would we take god that's a really good question and then we should ask them if they'll come and then we can give them a ceremony

it's like it will be like that movie if you build it they will come we'll just start asking all these really high end people

if they want to come to our high end British people we're like the Illuminati. We're like, this is a secret code. Sometimes when I read the Daily Mail comments, I do see,

she's not Irish, you can keep her. About me. About you. Yeah. I'm like, oh no. Don't give me away.

You're like, Céibh mí le fóttá? Which is Irish for excuse me. Céibh mí le fóttá? don't give me away you're like which is Irish for excuse me fuck you he's an Amazon idiot yeah you're welcome

we could definitely form a whole sentence and that's for sure 100% yeah we're like eat your sweets out of the bin I mean

that old traditional Irish saying you dope hey ghosties Joanna's always talking about how she doesn't give a crap about germs and sharing germs etc so here's one for you okay i met i met a lad on bumble we've been seeing each other a bit and then he invited me around for a sleepover time to get worldly no i had a half a bottle of savvy before i left i see if i half a bottle I'd be gone and we then shared another couple of bottles

over the course of the evening and went to bed I'd be a dead fish if that was wine dead fish it led to that sort of writing where you both think you're porn stars oh yeah but if you could see what was actually going on

without the wine goggles you'd be horrified who cares we were into it do you ever wake up the next day and you're like oh Spenny will always

remind me of things as well because obviously he doesn't drink and he'll be reminding me of things and I'm like please

stop there's like handprints all over the bread bin. You're like, I don't know. I don't want to know. The next morning, I was lying in his bed

thinking it all over and thinking, yeah, that was a good night. But then something dawned on me. We'd used a few toys which he'd produced apparently from nowhere.

Oh God. Nice vibrating bits and what have you. Wishing to investigate I rolled over and opened the bedside drawer. There they were. A colourful array of tools.

He was asleep so I woke him and asked him about the toys. What lad has this many sex toys ready to go? Oh God. I'd hate this so bad. Oh'd he hadn't asked me what i liked or if i was into that so why have them all bought and ready to go for our first night together oh jesus christ

the long and short with that was that these sex toys were not bought specifically for me. Oh. They were left from his previous relationship. Sure. He assured me that he bought special sex cleaning toy wipes. I had no idea these existed. Yeah, they don't. This is disgusting. And he'd given them a piece of once over. Special sex cleaning wipes. I just, honestly, and he'd give them a piece of once over special

special sex cleaning wipes I just honestly if you knew how like this is making my insides feel hot and spicy I couldn't I could not I'd be straight to the gum clinic I am Milt Sean

this is the gun clinic I meant the gum clinic. Is that what it's called? Oh, to get tested for STIs and STDs and UTIs and UTIs. Oh, yeah, yeah. But that didn't take away from the fact that our first night together had been spent inserting things into me

that he had on other occasions inserted into his ex. Oh, God. Come on, lads. Two better. Oh God. Come on lads. Do you better. Oh wait. Anyway he proposed at Christmas and will be married

next summer. No way. Her man's wife be dying but it isn't quite dead. I honestly We all know he didn't there's not

like those wives do not exist. The wives don't exist and also they were not just he didn't just buy those toys with his ex they've been like

a long rolling line of toys he could have picked them up off the road for all you know I don't think that man gives a shit

what he puts in anyone it's disgusting a dead squirrel from the road he's like oh well it's it's got rigor mortis

so we could probably use it I'm sure he could go in somewhere it's so revolting I'll sure it could go in somewhere. It's so revolting. I'll give it a shake down in the garden. It's got it now the fur.

I love that he pretended to clean them. I mean, come on. You know yourself. But listen, the moment had passed and the job was done. And you wanted it at the time, I suppose. You thought it was a great idea as I would after three bottles of wine or whatever you had

and I respect that he got involved you know he could have just not his interest was in your pleasure

not in the hygiene of the toys and I think pleasure should always win I agree and I mean if you were that pissed honestly I'd probably

have been dragging the bottle of wine to bed with me so I think that would be a better idea yeah much safer

you're like I'm wild look what I do wild it's like give it half a gin and tonic calm down please get that squirrel

out of the drawer honey please keep me in on my two sisters listen to the pod and I do not need them knowing this story anyway

I have a situation and I guess I'm looking for some sort of advice I am 30 and matched with this guy I used to go to school with on Bumble. Anyway, we got on well in school

and he was definitely, he has definitely matured like a fine wine in looks, not maturity. Anyway, it quickly became apparent he likes sex and that was probably what he was after. After a slight hit to the ego, I realized friends with benefits was fine for me and quickly came to the conclusion

I wasn't going to marry the man. Anyway, my dilemma, we probably see each other once a week and it's fun, the sex is good and we do get on well in person.

However, he wants to sext like most evenings and I just find it mind-numbingly boring. I agree. I sit there with my tea, cough,

wine, on the sofa, not even getting slightly turned on by the messages it honestly feels like a chore now is having

a casual sex partner worth having to sext him aimlessly five out of seven nights a week absolutely not

like sorry no that's your time that's your self-development time as Catherine would say and sexting

like absolutely bore off seriously I'm either getting some proper action or I'm not interested yeah like we don't need to

write it down and like are lads actually into that Jo Spenny tries to get me to do it sometimes and I'm like Spenny

I've left the house six hours ago I'm not doing it yeah as ever I can't speak for all men. But it's, you know, each to their own, innit? You're the only one we know. So, what?

So you like it or you don't like it? No, each to their own. It's not my thing. Texting and writing down, innit, is work. No. Yeah. It's a lot of admin, isn't it? Yeah.

Like, I would tell the guy, I'd always be like, oh, send us a photo, send us a photo. I'd just be'd just be like oh fuck that here i am my pajamas you know whatever go away no no i told you i've only ever sent one photo i've only once sent a topless photo you couldn't even see my tits because they're so small so it didn't matter have you only said oh jeez i sent i've sent a few now you sent me nudes for fuck's sake you sent it to the wrong person she's worried now you didn't actually that could easily be true

it wouldn't shock me at all I'd be like oh Joanne's been drinking she's sent a nude if I had half a glass of white now I'd be sent I have now like I'm kind of full of shit

because I have there's a couple of people out there now would have a fairly girthy I'd say you take I'd say you take a good shot I'm kind of full of shit because I have there's a couple of people out there now that would have a fairly girthy I'd say you take I'd say you take a good shot

I do take a good shot yeah I do I knew I knew that about you I'd say you have a drawer full of nice knickers that you never wear

only for the shots there'll be no knickers in the shots and then when you break up you're like delete my photos you know the usual although I went out with a guy once okay sure yeah I went out with a guy once and I, delete my photos. You know, the usual. Although I went out with the guy once.

Okay, sure. Yeah, I went out with the guy once and I was like, delete my photos. And he's like, sure, yeah. And then we got back together and I was like, did you delete them? And he's like, no, of course I didn't. And I was like, I don't consent to you looking at them if we're not together. Too late. You sent them to me.

They're mine now. I will not post them anywhere else, but I will post them to my eyes every so often. Well, if you do post them anywhere else, you're getting full blown arrested. Yeah, I know. I'm happy to just have them to my eyes every so often. Well if you do post them anywhere else you're getting full blown arrested. Yeah I know. I'm happy to just have them for my eyes. Fine. And use them as wanking material is what they would do. Well I just know that when you are wanking over my

hot sexy photos I'm not fucking happy about it. Okay well I am so I don't care and I'm going to wank on. Would lads not care that like you wouldn't want I don't care and I'm going to wank on. Would lads not care that you wouldn't want... I don't want that. Well, tough shit. You shouldn't have sent me the nudes.

I'm wanking. I'm wanking. This is to the end of the podcast today. I need to call the guard. Do you want to say goodbye I've changed my mind I want them back once the naked horse

is bolted very hard to put the horse back in the stable you