Newcomers: Sports, with Nicole Byer and Lauren Lapkus - Captain Marvel (w/ Emily Gonzalez and Sammy Smart of Too Scary; Didn't Watch)

Episode Date: June 21, 2022

The MCU finally serves up a female lead superhero and Nicole and Lauren are... well, less than impressed. Emily Gonzalez and Sammy Smart of new Headgum show Too Scary; Didn't Watch go off-script to watch a non-scary movie with us, as we meet Carol Danvers and discuss the moral ambiguity of Nick Fury doing... that thing... he did... to the skrull. You know the scene we're talking about.  Next week's movie: Avengers: Endgame (2019) Like the show? Rate Newcomers 5 stars on Spotify and Apple Podcasts and leave a review for Nicole and Lauren to read on the pod! Follow the podcast on Letterboxd. Advertise on Newcomers via Gumball.fmSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

This is a HeadGum Original. War is a universal language. I know a renegade soldier when I see one. Never occurred to me that one might come from above. above. Space invasion. Big car chase. Truth be told, I was ready to hang it up till I met you today.

So you're not from around here. It's hard to explain. I keep having these memories. I see flashes. I think I had a life here. But I can't tell if it's real. We have no idea what threats are out there. We can't do this alone.

We need you. I'm not what you think I am. Thank you. Well, this is us. We're doing... This is us. My favorite show. This is us on NBC, and we're going through the Marvel Cinematic Universe. This is Newcomers. I'm Nicole Byer.

And I'm Lauren Lapkus. And this is the 16th episode of the fifth season. Oh my God, we've really been doing this. Flying through. We are working our way through the Marvel Cinematic Universe with the help of fellow newcomers, super fans, and sometimes even people who have contributed. So yeah, this season's only going to be 20 episodes.

We're going to cover as much as we can. We're not going to get to everything. And today, wow, oh, wow, we are covering Captain Marvel. Captain Marvel, and it's available on Disney+. You can also watch it for a fee on Amazon, Apple TV, Google Play, and Vudu. And obviously, we're going to spoil the whole film, so deal with that. voodoo and obviously we're going to spoil the whole film so deal with that and nicole just before we bring our guests out what do you think of this movie this movie warren was tough it like reminded me of star wars in the worst way possible wow wow um i didn't really like there wasn't much

like of a girl power anthem until she stole shit from the motorcycle. And then I'm just a girl. And I have to say, I have to say I saw this in theaters randomly because it was a very random situation. I might have even mentioned before, but I thought I got excited at that part. But I think I had been like, you know, sitting there for two hours going like, what am I watching? And then they played a song I like and i was like yay and then this time i was like this movie i can't even follow for the i don't know how i watched it before i don't know what i thought was happening i mean it's true and these alien people oh god the alien family

and then a wild cat that was an octopus the cat and then the Tesseract I was like wait isn't what so I guess Captain Marvel why is the Tesseract

always there it takes place before Garty no I don't fucking know oh god the juice man was there

and he wanted the Tesseract and then I know and then it was the 90s yeah it was the 90s I was so confused and then those aliens look like watermelon.

They did. With Thanos' bald chin, and that was confusing to me. And I just, it was, it was, it was. I think we should bring out our guests because I feel like. We should. I would love to hear what they would think of this. Let's just do it. So we are so excited about our guests today.

We have two guests. We have Emily Gonzalez and Sammy Smart. And Emily, okay, I'll just introduce you and then I'm going to say something. But Emily Gonzalez is an actor and designer and Sammy Smart is a documentary film editor. And together they host a show now on HeadGum called Too Scary, Didn't Watch, where they watch and don't watch, respectively, horror movies and discuss them. So welcome to the show. We're so excited you guys are here. Thank you for coming. God, thank you guys so much for having us.

I wanted to say that I was asking Paula Tompkins for a podcast recommendation and he talked at length about your show and said it's so great. We love Paul. We love Paul. We love Paul for doing that, for spreading the good word of our show. And I love that you have a show where you don't have to watch the movie. Me too. Yeah, that's nice because people get mad at us when we say we didn't pay attention.

Can I read you a tweet this man tweeted today? Yeah, please. Ryan said, this is where I tap out. You can only listen to someone go, hey, I didn't pay attention. Here's my opinion so many times. Tap out, Ryan. And thank you for playing. Yeah, thanks for letting us know.

Thank you for playing. Yeah. What can we do? We can't please everyone. It is the fun of the podcast that we don't catch every little detail. And I don't know what to tell you. Some people, you know what I will say? Most people think it's fun.

Most people. That's fun most people that's the best you can do yeah that is the absolute best you can do every now and again we get reviews too they're like you're not detailed enough or you don't uh this isn't really a skip to detail and it's like yeah watch the movie yourself if that's what you want to do i also disagree that you guys aren't paying attention. You're taking very close attention. And you're watching them for the first time. You can't be expected to have memorized the script. Oh my God, thank you so much.

Thank you. Like everyone's lucky I remember what a Tesseract was. We reference this shit and we catch callbacks. I mean, like we are paying attention. Like you have to, we will just admit when we didn't catch something or we're not looking at our phone for five seconds which god save us we have to do yeah I mean during this one oh man this was tough Emily Sammy how familiar are you guys with the Marvel Cinematic Universe I would say I am I am less familiar than Sammy

I'm as familiar as anyone who is alive is, which is to say that it is all over the place. I have seen some, but I'm not as good at the all of them together movies. And I did at one point early in the pandemic on a night where I was bored and felt like I just wanted to let a movie happen to me. I picked the event.

I think I picked the Avengers infinity war. One of the later ones got 15 minutes in and I had absolutely, I was like, surely the filmmakers will help me out. Um, and they don't. And so, um,

I find it a little overwhelming, find it a little overwhelming. It's a lot to jump into like without the context because even with the context we're going what like this one i will say captain marvel 20 minutes in there's 40 000 things that have happened yeah a lot of things happened and then i was like she got stolen she's got memories who annette bening why are you being so creepy yeah I know okay wait um Sammy how about you have do you have any experience with this franchise um I'm a little a little bit more into it I still feel like I'm also reaching a bit of a like maximum capacity

it just like keeps growing and it feels like there's more and more things I need to remember and it is getting overwhelming even for me who normally really enjoys it. I for some reason started at Iron Man 3. That's where I hopped in. And I've seen most of them since then. And I'm I also really enjoyed the the series. I'm big on the series. Loved WandaVision. Loved Loki. Okay. What about about Hawkeye Hawkeye you know I even found something to enjoy in Hawkeye wasn't Jeremy Renner yeah it wasn't my favorite but I still had some fun and Sammy on the podcast you explain the movie that you you watch a movie yeah scary movie and Emily is it simply that you are too scared to watch the movie?

And so you're just afraid of horror films? Yes, but I would like to not be. So I am trying. I use the podcast as my way to dip my toe in. And I've started watching some, I've been doing it for about three years, and I've started watching some scary movies.

Because I'm very curious about them. I watched A Quiet Place, and I found that to be very tense. It is very tense. We went and saw Conjuring 3 in theaters with Betsy. We did. But it was not very scary, I thought. That's true. Which was kind of a bummer, because I was ready.

But Conjuring is, in general, a pretty scary. I mean, it was brave of you to even go into that. I think it's a pretty scary franchise. Isn't that the one with the nun with black eyes or something? She's part of that world, yeah. That's also a universe. There's a whole Conjuring universe. Oh, we could do that next.

We could. There's a lot of movies. I'm too scared, honestly. I think I'm too scared. Should we get into the Daily Bugle bop boop bop boop yes we should

this is our news segment this season where we give a recap of what's going on in the MCU so an animatronic there's a really goofy picture an animatronic

Spider-Man at Disney California Adventure Avengers Campus malfunctioned and crashed into a building that's really funny you can watch it on Instagram. So it's a 15-second clip of this gigantic Spider-Man flying backwards off this building. We're going to watch it.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Imagine being a child. I know. And being like, ooh, Spider-Man. Oh, my God. It looks like he's doing it on purpose. Oh, no. Oh, the stunt robot crashed for us i guess

he was he was supposed to do some of it yeah so i think in the show like there's an actor playing spider-man who does like some flips and then this robot like seamlessly transitions so it looks like he's doing this crazy thing but then he flew into a robot crashed into a building wow that's honestly my favorite thing i've seen in a very long time i loved it he flops so hard yeah it's like really lifeless oh boy someone was traumatized for sure probably it's I love Spider-Man. Spider-Man's dead now. Yeah. Because he literally saw him

flipping purposefully moments before. Okay, another piece of the Daily Bugle is we now know two new members of Guardians of the Galaxy Volume 3 cast.

Daniela, uh-oh. Mel? Mel? Ooh, that's good. And Maria? Bakalova.

Yes, teamwork. Either actress's roles have been disclosed. Mel Shure ooh that's good and Maria Bakalova yes teamwork either actress's roles have been disclosed oh that's Borat's daughter yeah oh my god

she's so good oh my god she's gonna be in Guardians of the Galaxy that's cool that's great one more thing is that Doctor Strange

and the Multiverse of Madness will stream on Disney Plus on June 22nd a little earlier than expected. So everyone hold your horses and get excited. Hold your little horses. It's coming this month. I saw it.

I was disappointed. Have either of you seen it? I saw it, yes. Samey did. It wasn't my favorite, but I liked it just because of the Sam Raimi-ness of it. Because I like horror a lot, I feel like so much of his little stamp was put on it. It's just so crazy.

Oh, yeah. Nicole, you said it was really scary. I thought it was pretty scary and pretty gruesome. Also, I did miss the first 15 minutes of it. You better believe I was so late, so I was pretty confused. It's confusing Yeah they're like I mean they're just getting to this point where You're like how the fuck am I supposed to remember

Everything that's happened They expect you to have done your homework I feel like You actually really need to know a ton of stuff for it Yeah I was confused as well But I don't understand where the little girl came from That must have happened in the first 15 minutes. Probably.

Yeah, but it starts with her in it, right? Like in the very first scene. She's like immediately there. Yeah. So there's not much explanation, but you've already gotten used to her. I guess you get a bit of explanation. But yeah, it is just, it's a lot. It takes 15 minutes to no longer care that you don't know where she's coming from.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's pretty much how this works, I would say. We just keep watching and then go. I guess I'll figure this out at some point. Yeah, I'll figure it out later. Sometimes I go, I don't understand, and the podcast will explain it. Like, when I am talking, it will make sense. There you go.

Something I like to tell people a lot is that what people I think that engage with comic book stories only in tv and film don't realize is that comic books have footnotes and so like if a character shows up or like a scene there'll be a little asterisk and then a little box that's like oh this happened in invincible iron man issue this is so nice do they not read the footnotes yeah so you flip through and then you go oh okay cool and then you don't have to worry about it you're like okay i believe you sure that happened in something I didn't read. And maybe you'll go and buy that issue if you are super interested. I would love if Marvel movies

would put in a black screen like silent films and just like a little bit like, this person is this and here's what their deal. And then like go back away and back into the movie. That would be so nice. But then that would make the movies five hours long. That's true. Because they'd have to explain every moment.

I don't have time. All right. Well, let's take a quick break and then we're going to jump into Captain Marymount. And we're back. We're back. Okay. So it was written by. I'm not good at names

and I've been accused on Twitter of not being able to read and it hurt my feelings. Do you want me to say it? It was written by Anna Boden, Ryan Fleck, and Geneva Robertson-Dourette which I'm not sure I said properly. I think you did. As you said all the names I was like, pretty easy.

I could have taken a swing. It was directed by Anna Boden and Ryan Fleck, and it was released on International Women's Day, March 8th, 2019. Oh, wow. That's extra thought. You know, and that kind of stuff means something to me as a woman. I actually love it now. Yeah, this is how I celebrated that year, for sure. Yeah, for sure.

I was like, I'm going to go watch a superhero kick some ass. So let's jump into our story here. In 1995, Verze, Brie Larson, a soldier for the Cree Empire who has no memory of her past or how she obtained her powers. Real quick. Yeah. So she's not blue like the other Cree people. And neither is, what's his name jude law jude law what was his name and nobody yeah and nobody explains that yeah i don't know i feel like why isn't jude law blue was like, oh, she's actually a human.

Yeah. Annette Bening is also not. I was going to say that. Spoiler, but she's not blue. They bleed blue. Right. She bleeds blue. Oh.

Maybe that's something. I did like that, and I was like, that'd be kind of cool. Why do some bleed blue and some are blue? That I do not know. I don't know. Leah? We'll just see what happens. I'm Googling, why are some. We'll just see what happens. Is that now or next?

I'm Googling, why are some Kree white? Twitch feels awesome. It feels like you can't ask that. Why are some Kree white? I think the answer is that it's just like environmental factors. Sure. Okay, so. Okay.

Okay. Someone's going to yell at me. The environmental factors are they're white. A soldier for. Okay. Okay. Someone's going to yell at me. The environmental factors are, they're white. A soldier for the Kree Empire, so she has no memory of her past or how she obtained her powers, wakes up from a nightmare on the planet Hala. She trains Yon-Rogg, Jude Law, a Kree Empire commander and leader of Starforce. Yon-Rogg believes that Verz is ready to join Starforce, and Verz goes to meet with the Supreme Intelligence, the artificial intelligence in charge of the Kree Empire,

who appears to her in the form of a woman she does not remember, played by Annette Bening. The Supreme Intelligence approves her for a Starforce mission with a team that includes, uh-oh, Min, Uruk, Gemma Chan, and Korath. Digimon Honsu? I think I said his

name right. Previously in Guardians of the Galaxy, their mission is to rescue a Kree operative named Saurlar on the planet Tophla, which is inhabited by the Kree mortal enemy, shapeshifters called, what are they? Skrulls? Skrulls. Skrulls, yes.

Which I hated, and I just, I didn't like it either. All of this felt so Star Wars-y. It was so Star Wars-y, and all the aliens fighting, I didn't like it either. All of this felt so Star Wars-y. It was so Star Wars-y. And all the aliens fighting, I was just like, oh my God. I was like, get me out of here.

And some of their conversations were so earnest while they were aliens and I was like, that's embarrassing. There's just something rough about that. Verus is abducted by Skrull General Talos,

Ben Mendelsohn, while the rest of the Star Force retreat. On the spacecraft, Talos gains access to Verz's memories from various points in her life

that she does not remember. We gotta talk about that. Growing up in small-town America as a tomboy and enlisting in the U.S. Air Force. Again, how is she not a person?

Yeah, but I think she is a person. I think she is. And then that blast made she not a person like yeah it was i don't but i think she is a person she is and then that blast made her not a person okay so vers awakens and telos explains that he wants information from her pertaining to a light speed engine she escapes and lands on planet c53 aka earth but can i just say uh-huh her memories was this one she? Was this when she was like, karaoke? Like she was like doing a couple of things. Yes. I just was thinking about filming those because it was like, that probably took a long time.

Like she had to do a lot. She's like the one where she's trying to climb the rope and she falls down, but it takes a long time. But then it's like two seconds of a memory. And then there's the one where she like crashes the go-kart and the man's like, you suck at driving. You shouldn't be out there i was like who is he what is this it's so mean i know i thought he was like her dad or something oh maybe it was her dad i feel like it is yeah leah says oh the cree gave her a blood transfusion so that's why her blood is blue but she is human okay thank you okay okay great makes sense okay but then her body would continue to regenerate

creed blood sorry now i'm down i know it should be purple yeah it would be purple wow we need to write a letter to mr marvel that you know what should be purple marvel yeah mr marvel her blood reminded me of gushers. It reminded me of Gushers too. Or that twisty that plastic bottle that you squeeze with the twisty top. Yes, yes, yes. Yeah, that was always really good. I'm sure that was the nastiest stuff ever actually.

So Vers crashes through the roof of a blockbuster video in the middle of a shopping plaza in LA. She meets Young S.H.I.E.L.D. agents Nick Fury and Phil Coulson. What they did to Nick Fury in CG was very strange. I couldn't believe that they put his hairline so far forward. Anyway,

before the, the scrolls catch up to her and later in a chase through Los Angeles, one of the scrolls impersonates Coulson and it just arrived with Fury and is killed after Fury discovers his true identity. I clocked that. I was like, that's not him. Oh, really?

Impressive. Yeah, because he was being weird. I always like that kind of thing, though, because I didn't catch that, even though I've seen it before. And I was like, oh, wow. I always love that kind of surprise where it's like you think everything's like this,

but really it's been this the whole time. I also felt like the blockbuster like okay i like nostalgic things but i also feel like that was the most obvious choice you could have made to show that it was the 90s like we don't have these there's way too much 90s like ha ha remember we're in the 90s like it's that's like it was very obnoxious to me. It wasn't so long ago that we I love 90s stuff. I'm a 90s kid but it's like stop like I remember I know where we are. But I felt like they put those posters

all over the blockbuster that were like just pasted up brand new Smashing Pumpkins REM like Rock the Vote. They were like the most untouched. They were like so glossy and just like taped on top of each other. I was like, okay, we get it.

Here's something funny. I didn't realize it was the 90s until we read it was 1995. I thought it was like the 70s. Oh my God. I love this. I thought it was like the nondescript 70s. Well, they didn't really. I felt that the costumes of like all the background artists were not

made very 90s like there was like not you could have gone full force with some of the at least some trends mixed in there because I feel like

I didn't see any trends and I was like you kind of forget that it's the 90s really fast you just get her nine inch nails shirt and her flannel

that she has to take off and put away how did she even know to tie it around her waist like that because if you're a gal you're born with a cool jean. That's true. And then he was like, put this cap on.

You look like you're. I was like, that's not really making her not look like that. But then she like placed it over her wig, like really like. Oh, that wig. Oh my God, the wig. Can you imagine trying to fight with someone and like get, her hair covered half her face. Well, I know. Put it behind your ear.

Put it down the whole time. I know. If you're kicking ass. If you're kicking ass, you can't see out of one eye. I don't know. Why would you handicap yourself in that way? I like the soft beach waves. Well, it was pretty.

I will say. It was pretty. It was beautiful. Impractical. It was impractical. It didn't move at all. No. But I gotta say

If that was a wig Which I'm not quite sure If it was You're not I'm not sure I think it might Actually be her hair Or a fall

Where just her hair Is out in the front It is one of the best Wigs If it's a full wig In the Marvel franchise That is true Yeah

They got some bad ones But I felt like it was Because it was so It stayed so still I feel I felt like it was because it was so, it stayed so still. I feel like maybe sometimes it was a wig and sometimes it was her hair. Like maybe for some like some at some point in filming the wig came

into play. Because her friend Maria had one of the worst wigs I've ever seen. Someone did her dirty. I could not believe this weird bowl cut On this poor black woman But it was like

Who Who did this to her 90s or something On her only 90s would be more of a pixie Yeah It was very I think Destiny's Child

They all had great pixies At a point in the 90s Yeah Except Beyonce And Annette Bening She had a pretty decent wig Although it wasn't Ventilated properly

But it was nice. What does that mean? It means you can see the part. Oh, okay. So it looks natural, so you can see some scalp in there. Yeah, because I'm actually looking at it now, and it's like actively not showing the part. Yeah, it's just hair.

Hair! Oh, my God. Okay, so she's on Earth in the... Okay, here we go. Meanwhile, Ver's researches one of her lost memories and takes a stolen motorcycle to a bar outside of town. Nick Fury meets her there after witnessing his first-ever alien autopsy,

and the two agree to work together. They next travel to a facility in Nevada and pull files that confirm that she has a missing fighter pilot who worked alongside Maria Rambeau, Lashana Lynch, and Dr. Wendy Lawson and Nat Benning, and they also meet Goose, a cat who seems to know verse. Now, Goose felt very Guardians to me.

Yes, very that. Also, Nick Fury really takes this alien autopsy well. Gotta say, nobody freaked. He didn't even freak out when there was a dead alien next to him. He was like, better cover him up. It was wild. Yeah, do you think he's just seen so much? I guess,

but I feel like he hasn't because he just started. Right. What did you think of the part where they are, the alien autopsy? It's like on the, it's on like the bed

or whatever they put it on and then they look at his dick. You know what? I thought that was a little invasive. You know, he's dead. I think we're all curious, but like he did they wouldn't

do it together you know you would do that when no one is in there yeah we all would but you wouldn't share it with a co-worker i don't it might have been funnier if the other guy left then he went oh i'm just gonna peek but also if we're gonna be that invasive let me know what's up what's your alien working with show Show it. Yeah, show us. It could be anything. Like it could be like a maple leaf. Like it could just be like something really weird. It could be a maple leaf.

It could be a fish. Okay, so when Coulson, oh wait, in the trivia in this episode, Sam Jackson, oh, he improvised that. Okay. I like that. What a king. I love it. Now I love it. sometimes improv's not always friendly okay when colson and the other shill agent show up fury realizes their boss keller

also played by ben mendelsohn has been compromised and is being impersonated by a scroll fury inverse hijack a quad jet to go to the Rambo residence in New Orleans. Maria and her daughter Monica reveal Versus' original name, Carol Danvers. What a boring name. I know when she's like, my name is Carol. I was like. It's so funny because it's like a Matrix-y reference.

Like my name is Neo. But Carol is like the least badass name ever. Because that fight between her and jude law in the beginning is kind of like morpheus and neo-e i was getting some matrix and apparently i've never seen that apparently kiana you've never seen the matrix oh my god it's pretty good i like it but apparently kiana reeves was supposed to be cast in Jude Law's part in this which I would have liked it me too I wonder why he said no

I feel like he's gotta get in this franchise at some point it's like 2019 was he doing he was probably doing a wick probably doing a wick

which I did see and I liked the first one I liked the first one as well love them then you'll like The Matrix I think okay

I'll watch it eventually so Talos and Nordex arrive at the Rambo as well. Then you'll like The Matrix, I think. Okay, I'll watch it eventually. So Talos and Nordex arrive at the Rambo residence and negotiate an alliance. Talos reveals that Carol's memories

were tampered with by the Kree, that the Skulls are refugees on the run from Kree oppression, and that Wendy Lawson, whose Kree name is Mar-Vell, was a double agent

and developing the lightspeed engine to help the Skrulls outrun the Cree. Carol's memories start to come back and she remembers it was Yon-Rogg who assassinated Mar-Vell. I feel crazy saying Mar-Vell. She also remembers gaining her cosmic powers from the light speed engine's energy core. Gotta say, all of this happened so quickly that I was like, oh, okay, we we're just gonna take these watermelons word for it like what we thought they were bad now the watermelon's good i know yeah and then when

yong rong when he shot marvell i was like why didn't he just shoot carol too like he had an open shot he could have been like pew pew instead he was like pew and then he was like hello and then she was like ah and then she was like this energy core babow i was like you shouldn't have given her the time did we already talk about the part or does this already cover the part where carol like um fights that old woman quote unquote on the train oh yeah that's much earlier and that was fun can we just talk about the only fun i had that was really i. And that was fun. Can we just talk about that? That was the only fun I had. That was really, I thought that was very fun. And I was like, who's in that costume? She basically is on the train and she's like, someone here is bad.

And she's trying to figure out who. And then she just punches an old lady in the face. And that person is bad. Well, because she passed the old lady before. So she was like, oh, since I passed her, that must be one of the Skrulls. But my favorite part was all the other people on the train being like we gotta help this old lady and i'm like you just saw that old lady do a kickflip she doesn't need help she's like bouncing off the walls i know and also the

part where carol gets out i just call it carol from now on where she gets off the train and everyone's like looking at her like huh like I didn't think her outfit was that weird. And everyone's looking at her like, what's up with her? I thought her outfit was kind of normal. Like it wouldn't, nothing would, it wouldn't shock me if I saw that person on a train. No. I'd go, oh, she's going to work at a birthday party. You work at a birthday party

Off to her job Yeah I mean I wouldn't look at her weird I mean if she looked like Thanos Then I'd be like that's a cause for concern That man's big And purple And has a weird chin His chin looks like

In a berkley glove One thing I really didn't like Why did her helmet have a mohawk Oh the like underwater Or I guess in space too Not everyone did have a mohawk? Oh, the like underwater or I guess in space. Not everyone did have a mohawk, but she did. And I just think it's a signature Captain Marvel thing in the comics. I just Googled this.

And I'm also not a fan of it. I'm not fond of it. In the cartoon version or the drawn version, it looks like her hair coming through. I think that would make more sense. But it was so I mean, her her hair is much longer than that i think that's what it's supposed to be though even in this because when she like undoes it her hair like flutters down i guess it would even if it was just a i don't know the helmet right that actually is probably the accurate for the length of her hair for real but the cartoon version looks longer like it flows behind like a sort of unicorn like mane it's sort of interesting i feel

like she should have had short hair i'm looking at pictures and she seems right yeah i think she does have some short hair at some point maybe in the next maybe when she returns in endgame she'll have short hair maybe okay wait i just googled this and maybe this is going to be in our trivia or something but like it says the mohawk costume is the result of a comic creator's bet. So basically, the writer Kelly Sue DeConnick made a bet with the artist Jamie McKelvey. And when Carol Danvers became Captain Marvel in the comics, it wasn't her first time as a superhero. She'd already been saving the world for years under different names, but mostly Ms. Marvel. And her Ms. Marvel outfit was a swimsuit, thigh-high boots, and a sash, which that sounds

pretty hot. Yeah. She looks like Pamela Anderson on this cover, which that's pretty good. But then, yeah, so they made a bet, basically. So the editor sent some designs that were done in-house. I did not love them. And I was like, can we get Jamie McKelvey to do this? And he was like, no, we don't have the budget.

And they ended up doing it. And I could read a 12-page article about this because it keeps going and going. I don't think you should. And I'm not going to. And then that's what happened. But yeah, so it was a bet. All right.

Well, now we know. I like the mohawk. I'm into it. All right. I think it's okay. I think it looks better in the drawing. It's a little spiky. So, Yon-Rogg arrives on Earth to confront Carol, who's actually Norax.

Meanwhile, Carol, Nick Fury, Talos, Maria, and Goose take the quadjet to Mar-Vell's laboratory orbiting Earth, where Talos is reunited with his wife and daughter. And we learn that the energy cord that gave Carol her powers is actually the Tesseract. Okay, this was so wild. I was like, okay, so we find out double agents, whatever. They're not actually bad. And then we find out that the rest of these people are just floating in space. Da fuck?

And then that conversation with like the family, like when he's like with his wife and daughter and then she's like all scared of Carol and then he's like she's a friend he was like in her ear like babe it's okay she's a friend

I was like don't they have another language he could be like like it just felt so crazy that he was just like speaking English everyone spoke English in this movie

she's good she's good that's Ben Mendelsohn and I love that they also just let him have his Australian accent like that there's inconsistent accents throughout the scrolls like they're just like him have his Australian accent, like that there's inconsistent accents throughout the scrolls.

Like they're just like, yeah, just do Australian. That's fine. Whatever. Oh, my God. That's so funny. It didn't even register with me. It didn't register either. But that is funny.

So Starforce ambush them and place Carol under, I don't know, stasis to confront the Supreme Intelligence. to confront the supreme intelligence. Danvers removes an inhibitor that has been limiting her full power potential and engages in an all-out battle with Starforce. Goose, who's actually a Flerken, swallows the Tesseract and several Kree soldiers. Yeah, the Flerken thing, I thought was wild. It was crazy. It was kind of fun. But it felt kind of silly silly and like a guardian's way. But it was so weird because the rest of the

movie wasn't silly. No. So there was basically no humor in this movie, I would say. Yeah. I did not tee hee hee not one, not one time. There was like the part where Carol comes up, like when she just lands in the blockbuster and then she walks up to like the car and she's like, is my translator working? You know, she's like, it felt kind of like a Buzz Lightyear sort of moment where like she thinks she's like doing something and everyone else is like, what?

Like that was almost a joke. I mean, it's literally Buzz Lightyear because Buzz Lightyear I think is from Star Force. Is he the same? Is it the same thing? I think it's Star Force Command. Do he the same? Is it the same thing? I think it's Star Force Command. Do you hear me?

Oh, my God. That's hilarious. And Chris Evans about to be in Lightyear. Yep. Which I also just read was banned in multiple countries because it has a gay kiss. Oh, no. Let the gays kiss. Who cares?

Who gives a shit? Also, it's crazy. It's animated. It's animated. It's like, yeah. You can't watch two cartoon characters. Somebody literally drew it. It's so fake. Yes.

Totally fake. No lips touched. Nobody's lips touched anybody's lips. It's in a movie about a toy, but the guy based on the toy or vice versa. Yeah, really weird. Okay, so Yon-Rogg authorizes Ronan the Accuser, Lee Pace, reprising his Guardians of the Galaxy role, to dispatch Kree ballistic missiles at Earth. And Danvers easily destroys the missiles and one of the Kree warships.

And Minerva, the last operable Star Force member, intercepts the quadjet to the Mojave Desert. and Danvers easily destroys the missiles and one of the Kree warships, and Minerva, the last operable Star Force member, intercepts the quadjet to the Mojave Desert. There's a lot going on. But Maria Rambeau shoots her down. Yon-Rogg arrives on Earth and challenges Danvers to a duel, which she wins, and she sends him back to Hala with the warning. I did enjoy when he was like,

prove yourself! And she was like, no. That was funny for me. So in the aftermath, Goose claws and blinds Fury's left eye, which I guess that's why he's going to wear a patch later. The Skrulls take temporary shelter at the Rambo residence and Carol vows to help them find a home. But before going, she hands Fury a modified pager that he can use to call her in the event of an emergency, which is what he does in the last movie in fucking Infinity War.

Okay, I actually really like that connection. While drafting a proposal for the Protector Initiative for S.H.I.E.L.D., Fury notices that Carol's call sign was Avenger in the Air Force and renames it the Avengers initiative. But you don't even see him type it. You just see him delete Protector. And then he smiles as he types the new thing. And I was like, he typed Avenger. And then I was like, wait, didn't he have an eye injury earlier?

But then his eye was fine. And I was like, OK, so it's like a fake out. Yeah. And then it's like a real thing. he was picking out eyeballs it was pretty serious that part was pretty crazy and then at the with the pager this is really a fun thing that you just put together so we watched that movie which came out way no it came out earlier why did i think it came out later no but then i don't like it as much. Oh, so we weren't supposed to fully understand. We don't know what the pager is in Infinity War. Now we know what the pager is.

But they should have made Captain Marvel first. So then that would be a huge payoff. I would have liked it way more if I knew what the pager was from watching this movie if I was a fan that had already seen them. That's weird. And it's funny because I have seen that one. You know,

that's what the Reddit's saying right now. She actually did watch this one already. So what does she mean? She doesn't know. Well, I didn't remember because I didn't know

what was going on. In a mid-credit scene set in 2018 after the events of Avengers Infinity War, Steve Rogers, Natasha Romanoff, Bruce Banner,

and James Rhodes analyze Fury's pager at the Avengers compound. Carol suddenly appears and demands to know where he is. In a post-credits scene, Goose coughs up the Tesseract on Nick Fury's desk. I guess which lets the Tesseract loose for Thor? I think that's where we first see the Tesseract. I went through it. So the first place we saw it was with captain america

red skull had it oh yeah and then it fell into the ice howard stark had it oh he he howard stark formed shield how did red skull get the tesseract he got it in germany or no not germany norway at the beginning of the first captain america yeah but how did he get from nick fury's desk to germany or norway captain america that was the 40s movie. Yeah, but how did it get from Nick Fury's desk to Germany or Norway? Captain America is before you. So that happened before. Did it just like come from space? Oh, fuck.

Yes. Okay. Jesus Christ. This is hard. Yeah. It's really complicated. Yep. So, and it was there and it was being developed by S.H.I.E.L.D.

I just looked this up. It's why I sound crazy. By Project Pegasus, which they've referenced in a couple other movies, just looked this up. It's why I sound crazy. Um, by project Pegasus, which they've referenced in a couple other movies, just like offhand. And that's what Annette Bening joined because she was looking for the Tesseract because she'd heard of it. She had it in that lab.

Then Nick Fury has it back. So then at the beginning of Avengers, that's how he, he's just had it ever since wow we've been talking about the Tesseract and then Thor got it for months now at this point

I liked when the cat coughed it up I didn't mind it you know liked it's you know relative I don't like when animals puke they make that awful noise. It's bad. I know.

It was really reminding me of my now deceased cat. Oh, I'm sorry. So bring it down. It's totally fine. She had a great life. Oh, Lord. I can't. I can't mention her without saying she's dead. I guess I'm still processing.

Well, animals are very important to people. I don't know what I would do if something happened to Clyde. I know, it's too sad to think about, honestly. Anyway, Captain Marvel was not nominated for any major awards, but it did win an MTV Movie Award for Best Fight Scene for Brie Larson and Gemma Chan, which, you know, I didn't love the fighting in this movie. You know, I like the idea of this movie,

but I did not think it was executed well. I think that's how I felt too, because I was excited about a female superhero. I'm into all that. Like, that's the one I would be, since it was like one of the only ones I've ever seen, I was most excited to see that. I'm like, oh, interesting.

But yeah, I feel like it was really complicated and convoluted and a bit like too many. Like truly, if you were just if you're just trying to pay attention to it for the sake of talking about it like we do. I was like so much is happening. I don't know what's going on. But then it actually was our quickest summary in a way. It was like you can just kind of pop right through it. But in the moment, it feels like so much is happening in each minute.

It just feels like it really lacks like personality. It just is sort of a movie that happens. I agree with you. There's like no charm to her or so that makes the stakes feel really low because I'm like, okay. I agree because I feel like the 90s part of it could have been a really fun thing. Like I think that like that's totally appealing to me and probably many people. But like it didn't feel like they really had fun with the 90s like it could have been like more of a thing like just have more fun with that the what's the point of them being in the 90s if you kind of just

show like two things from it and don't really like explore what that means that it's the yeah and none of it's like that connected to the story like I feel like the music being all 90s is like fun because I like 90s music but then I feel like in the guardians of the galaxy where it's happening because of the tape recorder adds something to it where it's like in the story as well and this just kind of feels like they're like well let's just throw some 90s music in there and it's like i guess yeah that's fun like not to harp on i'm just good good in this world. It wasn't necessary. Like I love that song, but I was like, I don't feel the need for that in this moment because there was nothing really about her being a woman and struggling or anything that I was

like, why are we bringing this up? She's been pretty strong the whole time. Just a little, you know, dizzy because she didn't know where she came from or nothing like that. But like she wasn't overcoming. I don't know. It didn't feel like she was overcoming anything. Now that we're saying that it's like the flashbacks I guess were maybe supposed to lay that

groundwork like oh this guy yelled at her because she was like bad at driving when she was little and she was also five. But I didn't think that had anything to do with the girl and just that she was like bad at life. Right because then she's like failing on the ropes and they were like yeah you'll never be good at this. It wasn't like you're a girl.

That wasn't really her. There's that one pilot who was like, that's why they call it a cockpit. But it's like, that was one guy. Oh, yeah. Oh. By the way, I did a pilot with the little girl, McKenna Grace.

Oh, my God. Years ago. We've spoken about her before because she seems like the hardest working child in Hollywood. She's in everything. She's in everything. She's in everything. She's so much stuff.

Wait, is she? Yeah, oh my God. Look her up. Especially horror movies and stuff. Oh my God, she's so much. Yeah, she was in The Haunting of Hill House, which we talked about. She's so cute and she's a great actor. And I worked with her like probably five, no, way more than that.

Oh my God. It was probably seven, eight years ago. Nine years ago? She was really little um she was probably like four or five yeah she's been doing it for a long time whoa how old is she she looks young she's like 13 i think she's 13 that would make sense and i worked with her when she was five yeah she's working she's working she's in huge huge stuff always i hope she's happy i know oh my god i think she is she has little music videos. Always crazy. I hope she's happy. I know. Oh my god, I think she is. She has little music

videos she makes. She's a singer. She's very adorable. How cute. She's adorable. Fantastic. That makes me happy. Yeah, and she's great. She's also very pretty. She's so cute. Stunning. Yeah. Just like a classic beauty. What a dream. I know. I hope someone's saying that about

me right now somewhere. They are. They are. Oh, my. Classic beauty. They are saying she is stunning. Well, you know what? You are. And someone is saying that. Thank you. Lauren, you're stunning.

You don't have to say it just because I said it. It's fine. No, no. I'll say it. I believe it. I believe it, too. Oh, my God. Okay.

Well, the reception of this film, Captain Marvel grossed over a billion dollars worldwide. Well, good for that. And had the highest opening numbers of any female-led film. Well, that makes sense. Yeah. Wasn't it the first one? It holds 79% critic rating on Rotten Tomatoes, with most reviewers praising the performances of Larson

and the rest of the cast. Yeah. And ahead of its release, the film's Want to See score, an audience anticipation poll on Rotten Tomatoes, had fallen to 28%. Oh, that's mean. The low number was due to review bombing by trolls

who had attacked the movie on the site with negative comments about the movie and about Larson's feminist messaging. Fuck you. I remember that. Nothing should work like this. This is crazy. Rotten Tomatoes changed their rules

because of this movie because oh wow because people were yeah rating it like zero before it even came out so now you can't rate a movie until after it's out because of this i mean so wow and then a point of doing that like people are because people are mean sad people i don't like it and i don't like it however a poll by cinema score after the film's release shows that the film holds an a rating among audiences so people actually do like it i gotta say i think i would really like it if they didn't try to shoehorn an empowering message to me that was like not shoehorned even hard enough yeah that montage at the end of her like standing up over and over again i didn't feel like i was waiting for her to stand up like

yeah she's been standing she'd been right been doing awesome the sort of the whole time right yeah she like starts off badass and then they try to tell us that she's not as badass as we think she is and i was like no she's pretty cool i know and think she is? And I was like, no. She's pretty cool. I know. And then she gets her new outfit at the end and the little girl punches in the color codes. I'm like, how does she know how to do that on her arm, by the way? I know. I was wondering that, too. She seems to know her way around this little wrist thing. Why don't we make it

red? And the girl goes, okay. I know. She's playing on a computer game. I was like, how does she know how to do this? But that was cute in her costume. Which that little girl, by the way, will come back in WandaVision which aren't you guys watching WandaVision actor there we are gonna watch some of it later we're okay and this I thought I remember so I had seen this movie when it came out and then this was my second time seeing it when I watched it for this and I remember thinking this at the time and then I rewatched it and I

thought it again and I don't know if I'm supposed to or if it's in the comics or and I'm already teasing this way too much. It's not a big deal. Are her and her best friend, are they lovers? Are we meant to think that at all? Because their chemistry was incredible. And it really felt romantic to me. And I could be putting that on the movie. I would prefer that.

Does anybody agree? I would like that. Yeah, I don't know. I'm into that. It would be way, way interesting, I would say. I think, I wasn't thinking it during it, but I like that idea. I like it too. Cool.

Let's hope that happens. I want to see them make out. it if toys can do it they can i mean i can't watch toys kiss all right we have to take a quick break we'll be right back with more captain marbel We're back. Some trivia for you on this movie. Stan Lee passed away during the editing of the film. Marvel Studios put together the special opening logo to honor him. And I don't remember his cameo.

In his cameo, Lee is reading the script. Or on the train or whatever. She looks at him and they do a little knowing look. Yes. He is seen reading the script for Kevin Smith's 1995 film Mallrats and reciting the line, Trust me, true believer. As revealed on Smith's YouTube page, Stan's health was in decline and he could not muster his trademark enthusiasm for his line read. Aww. So the

producers looped in Lee's unused audio from that film. I'm sorry. If someone is not able to read a line, they shouldn't be on set. He... Well, yeah, like you're saying, he's not healthy enough to function. Yes. And we dragged him to a

bus. I'm sure that's not the last thing he wanted to do. Nicole, was it Paul Scheer who told us the story about how they like woke

Stanley up to speak? Oh my God. Paul was like just a fan and he was like at some sort of convention or a show

or something and Stanley was sleeping in a room and then he's like, well, wake him up. We'll have him say hi to you. He's like, no, I'd really prefer

you don't do that. Oh wow. Also just to meet like a random person. It's like, they don't know up. We'll have him say hi to you. He's like, no, I'd really prefer you don't do that. Those are just to meet like a random person. It's like, you know, they don't know each other. He doesn't care. Let him sleep. I know. Okay, so Samuel L. Jackson, he improvised peeking at the Skrull's junk beneath the sheet. I think that's a good improvised moment.

Brie Larson is allergic to cats, so her scenes involving Goose were filmed with a puppet or VFX. Oh. Wow. I feel like you, they'd be like, can you take a Claritin? Yeah, I'm allergic to animals and I have animals. The cat did look fake pretty much the whole time. Yeah, I was gonna say the CGI was

overwhelming on that cat. It was a fake cat. In the comics, Captain Marvel's cat is named Chewie after Chewbacca from Star Wars and this film was named Goose after Goose Bradshaw

from Top Gun yeah okay I've just I've seen Top Gun Maverick twice in the past week okay

everyone loves it so good I absolutely loved it Sammy saw it twice as well wow so all of the like yeah fighter pilot stuff

and I loved it but I also had this point where I was like they're not actually flying i've seen what it looks like when actors actually fly in planes and it made it much less enjoyable i was like top the comparison was it for real wait so the actors because i did we did talk about this i think that or maybe it was somewhere else but that they had to learn how to fly but they literally flew planes i think there were the actors. They did learn how to fly. I don't think they are while they are filming. Except for Tom.

Okay, maybe Tom is. Tom is actually flying. I believe he is. That's crazy. He's like notorious for that. Tom does it for real. He does love stuff. There's no green screen. I'm amazed by that. It just feels different. You know, you can feel it. Well, for sure.

It is on my list to watch both Top Guns. I haven't seen the old one either. Nicole, have you seen the old one? Sure haven't. I was going to go see the new one, but I was like, I should go see the old one first. Yeah, I think so too.

I feel like it'd be more fun to watch the new one if you know the old stuff. May I recommend seeing it in 4D? 4D? What's that where they like acted out as a play? No, it's... There's a theater downtown.

I mean, I guess there's 4D theaters everywhere, but your whole seat shakes like you're in a roller coaster. It's like that Honey, I Shrunk the Kids ride. That's immediately what I thought of. Where they spray water at you. There's a part where smoke goes off in the theater and lights flash.

It's so funny. I laughed so. Sammy, I did that too. Oh my God. Oh my God. That's really fun. It was stressful. Kind of.

But I mean, it does sound pretty stressful, but fun in a fun way. It's an immersive experience. Our last piece of trivia is when the Captain Marvel trailer dropped, some fans express express their disapproval that Larson doesn't smile in the trailer. In response, Larson posted a Twitter user's reimagined MCU posters that had the iconic Marvel superhero sporting an over-the-top smile. This is creepy. Oh, boy. Oh, boy.

Oh, my God. It's so weird. Ew. People were also very mad in the trailer they showed the moment where she punches the old lady on the bus

in the trailer but just out of context so people were like wow she's so mean she punched an old lady Carol Imbrace is a villain it's pretty funny

oh my god that's so dumb that's so annoying yeah and also just telling a woman to smile is like truly such a cliche it's like shut up I know

at least be original yeah okay well it's time for our very important segment is Chris in this this is a moment where we ask if a Chris was in this film like Hemsworth etc well we had Chris Evans in the

mid credit post credit scene yeah that's the only Chris this is the point where we ask Sammy and Emily if you can think of a Chris Christine Kristen et cetera

that should have been in this film any sort of person whose name could be Christy maybe I think Christoph Waltz would have made a great addition to the

to the scrolls that's nice doing this again normal accent just mixing up some accents in this scroll people that would have been helpful just to balance out the Australian like it's anything

throw Kristoff in there our second segment is is a kiss in this? was there a kiss in this film? we got close we got close with Talos and his reuniting with his wife.

Did they not kiss? I don't think so. They just pushed their faces closer. They did the forehead touch. That's worse. That's more intimate. I know. It's so serious.

And then when he whispered in her ear, like, baby, baby, it's good. Baby, don't worry. She's chill. She's chill. I hated that. I don't think I wanted to see any romance in it. Maybe I wanted to see Captain Marvel fuck that motorcycle man and then steal his shit. Yeah, I think maybe with the female superhero, like, I guess it was good that we didn't see her get, like, really horny while she's figuring everything out.

It's kind of like, there's no room. There's no time. I don't know. I mean there's always time but you know. There's always time. These movies are two hours long. You can take five minutes and show me some smooches. Yeah. I mean like she and Jude Law could have made out. It wouldn't have made any sense. Or her and Maria.

Yeah right. Now we say we were all waiting for her. I rewrite history. So this is our segment, Five Stark Industries, where we read five star reviews of our own podcast. Oh, my God. This one says five stars. Oh, boy. This podcast does the incredible job of making me think I like movies that I never liked and that I hate movies I thought I loved.

Five stars. Wow. Interesting. So this person's trying to grow. I love it. Yeah. I feel like that's true for us. I'm kind of surprised we didn't end up liking this one more because we often, as we talk about it, go like well I guess it was pretty good.

After talking about it, this is one of the only movies where I was like I don't ever want to see it again. But I am excited to see Captain Marvel in Endgame because I'm really excited to see Endgame because I got to see how all these dusty people come back to life. But I got to say, so she was a maid and my very good friend kind of ruined the movie for me. She told me something. She told me a big old spoiler.

Oh, no. And then after she said it, I was like, wait, that didn't happen in Infinity War. She went, oh, no. Oh. Oopsie. I will say that little post-credit scene, I also did not really enjoy this movie, but then I saw the post-credit scene and it did make me think,

well, I want to know what they're all talking about. It made me feel like I was literally missing out on something. That's how they get you excited for Endgame. These little post-credit scenes leave you wanting more. I know. I'm a sucker for them as well. They worked.

It's like a good little cheesecake. You're like, can I have another nibble? In addition to Apple reviews of newcomers, we're also going to be reading reviews of Letterboxd. And if you don't know what that is,

how dare you? So here's a Letterboxd review by Fran. Haven't felt this empowered since i watched the breakaway scene from the princess diaries to royal engagement 2004 wow and then we got three stars from allure samuel l jackson's nick fury and his cat goose kind of carried the whole thing not gonna lie it's pretty funny. Well, what would you two say is a one sentence review and star rating you would give this film? I would say I liked it slightly more upon a second viewing, but won't be watching it a third time.

I give it three stars. Okay. Okay. Fair. Good movie to have watched. Not so fun to watch, two stars. Ooh, okay.

Lauren? I'm gonna say, I wish Goose would barf up the whole movie. Generally, too confusing, too long too not horny I guess

at that point it's like if we're going to go this long and I'm going to be so confused I do wish there was a kiss I will say two stars I feel like that might be my lowest review that I've given yeah I'm going to say three stars because I really like Brie Larson in The Room. Well, for sure.

We can't even comprehend her other works. You're just saying you liked her in something else? Yeah, of course. I just feel so bad giving it a low rating because I really like Brie Larson. Well, me too. To me, this has nothing to do with that. Okay, then I guess two and three fourth stars, a little confusing,

not as empowering as I thought it was going to be. I did like her flying around and stuff. I like Samuel L. Jackson. And then I like the old lady fight. Okay. All right, great. So you guys out there should write us a review

on Apple Podcasts. We read one on each episode and we also ask that you rate the podcast on Spotify because it helps people find us and I guess it's just good. Yes. It's nice.

Sammy, Emily, do you guys have anything that you would like to premiere? Just our podcast, Too Scary Didn't Watch, available wherever you get your podcasts we recap horror movies it's fun

it's fun we like more fun than this movie was good well that's great well we will be back next week with Avengers Endgame and I'm so excited to see how everybody's

dusty and then not dusty, maybe. True. I am curious about what happened with all the half people who are gone. Right? Yeah. All right. Very, very curious. I need answers.

Because I know Tom Holland. He's got to come back. Right. How's that going to work? I don't know. All right. Well, we'll see. Bye-bye.

Bye-bye. Bye-bye. Thank you. That was a Hidgum Original.