Newcomers: Sports, with Nicole Byer and Lauren Lapkus - Fast & Furious (w/ Geoffrey James and Reilly Anspaugh)

Episode Date: August 17, 2021

Geoffrey James and Reilly Anspaugh (Review Revue podcast) join Nicole and Gabrus to discuss the fourth film in the Fast & Furious Franchise—Fast & Furious (2009).Be sure to check ou...t Geoff & Reilly's on Review Revue and The Headgum Podcast on Headgum.Like the show? Rate Newcomers 5-Stars on Apple Podcasts and let us know what franchise they should check out next.Follow Nicole Byer:Twitter: @nicolebyerInstagram: @nicolebyerFollow Gabrus:Twitter: @gabrusInstagram: @gabrusAdvertise on Newcomers via Gumball.fmSee Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

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Starting point is 00:00:00 This is a HeadGum Original. What do you want? Give me a name! Give me a name! You here to take me in, O'Connor? Y'all know. She's my friend, too. I'm going with you. I ain't coming back.
Starting point is 00:00:51 This is where my jurisdiction ends. And this is where mine begins. Let's just stop someone from telling them you're a cop. The same thing that's keeping me from telling them why you're really here. A lot has changed. You're right. Dom? Dom! Thank you. Wow! Welcome to another episode of Newcomers.
Starting point is 00:02:24 Lauren Lapkus is out for the season because she's got an eight pound thing that came into her life that she has to take care of. And you can guess what that is. It's smarter than a cat, but dumber than a dog. Right now. It's going to end up being smarter than everything. This is the fourth season of the fourth, no, the fourth episode of the fourth season. We're watching the Fast and the
Starting point is 00:02:42 Furious franchise. And well, baby, it's going to be ten episodes. We're going to cover nine movies and Hobbs and Shaw. And we're talking about the fourth film in the franchise. Fast and Furious. And if you Google it, it's hard to find any
Starting point is 00:02:58 information on the movie because it brings you to the franchise because they named these movies in the wildest way. It only gets more fun, too. This one people call Ampersand because they remove the articles and it's just Fast Ampersand Furious. Griffin Newman told me that some people refer to this as Ampersand because it's hard to say Fast and Furious.
Starting point is 00:03:20 Which one? Well, Fast and Furious. The Fast and Furious. Not the Fast and the Furious the one with Braga the most memorable bad guy of a film ever Phoenix
Starting point is 00:03:33 is any of this ringing a bell? so Ampersand is available on DVD it's free on Peacock and you can watch it for a fee on Amazon Apple TV
Starting point is 00:03:43 Google Play and Vudu guess what we're gonna fucking spoil it because we're talking about the movie so Gabrus it's free on peacock and you can watch it for a fee on amazon apple tv google play and voodoo guess what we're gonna fucking spoil it because we're talking about the movie um so gabrus you saw this in theaters i of course i've seen all i've seen all nine and hobs and shaw in the theaters this one was one that i was let down by but the ending and not just the final moment but the whole ending sequence was so fun for me uh at the time that i dug i dug in and enjoyed the rest of this see you said you were like this is one of the the worst ones yeah i liked this one this one returned to the gritty uh kind of
Starting point is 00:04:19 indie vibe of the first well what you liked about it is that it got that fucking toretto and well the last movie didn't have toretto or brian in it it's definitely they're definitely a major factor in what we like about these movies yes i like that people were back um gotta say they fucking kill michelle rodriguez but i know she's in later movies okay so're going to unpack a lot of this because she's one of the several resurrections that happens in this series. Let's introduce our guests. Yes, let's do that. We have some friends of the HeadGum family here. You recognize him as a dumbass, and you recognize both of them from the Review Review podcast.
Starting point is 00:05:01 We got Jeffrey James and Riley Anspaugh. We're recording at 10 a.m. Pacific on a sunday which is why we're on the episode no one real could would say yes well you heard us this is the worst episode of the series uh the movies uh so oh my god you guys this film took 12 years off of my life it really it, it really did. I, when it was like, I'm like, okay, I got 30 minutes left. And then I looked again.
Starting point is 00:05:29 I'm like, how do I still have 20 fucking minutes left? But your right gave us the last like 10, 15. That was worth it. But everything else beforehand, I mean, my God,
Starting point is 00:05:42 I guess I'm, I guess I'm the minority here. No, I guess guess I'm I'm the minority I guess you are I'm a minority I'm a minority I guess I'm a minority is a very funny title of a memoir I guess I'm a minority by Nicole Byer
Starting point is 00:05:57 but I liked it I genuinely loved it I thought it was so fucking fun I want to talk about this because I always remember this one as the worst one, but after watching them in order again, the flavor shift from Tokyo
Starting point is 00:06:14 Drift to this is delightful. I miss Han because I love Han. Well, we get a little bit of Han. You get a touch of Han and that's all you need. I fucking loved when Han was like, eh, make it to Tokyo. And I was like, wait, may I go to Tokyo? And I was like, wait, what?
Starting point is 00:06:30 And spoiler alert, but five ends with, where do you want to go next? How about Tokyo? And he goes, not just yet. Like, wait, let's do one more movie before I die. And do they ever go back? What? They do go back and he does die again.
Starting point is 00:06:45 Not just yet. But then he's also resurrected from that. We will get to it. He's the other resurrection. There's a few. Gabriel, my mind is blown. There can't be more than one resurrection. Because I thought I knew these movies and there's so much I don't know. Dude, I'm not exaggerating.
Starting point is 00:07:02 This is the movie of the series I've seen the least, and it is still four or five times. And I am confused by the fucking movies. I conflate them all in my head, because it's like, which is the one with the cars and the sort of steel drum Caribbean music? And it's like, that's all nine, bro. Is there a scene in all of these?
Starting point is 00:07:22 But I feel like it's the most prominent in two. Sorry. No, I'm sorry. I feel like every movie, most prominent in two. Sorry. No, I'm sorry. I feel like every movie, this is the only one I've ever seen in this franchise. But there's gotta be. Same here. We got newcomers, finally.
Starting point is 00:07:33 True newcomers. Old comers and newcomers uniting. Does every movie have a scene on the beach where there's like tons of bonfires happening and people convenient to just kind of stare at cars? And a lot of corona. Yeah. We talk about that a lot on newcomers
Starting point is 00:07:50 because it's the PG-13 sexiness of this movie. Yes, totally. This one was the sexiest so far. It was the most triple kissing of women for sure. There's way too many lesbian kisses. There was so much triple kissing. And you had a lot of butt shots. And then you had Letty and fucking Dom
Starting point is 00:08:12 in all white on a cliff where she's like fucking dry humping him. I was like, you better get it. Wearing a shirt from Diesel Jeans. His dad's company. Days before this, so I live in an area that was close
Starting point is 00:08:30 to like an F9 poster. And like a week ago, my boyfriend was like, do you think you'll ever watch a Fast and Furious movie? I'm like, in my life, I don't think so. I can't see myself doing that.
Starting point is 00:08:39 Three days later, I get a text from Jeff being like, want to be on Newcomers? We got to watch Fast and Furious. Let's fucking go. Life comes at you fast, Riley. Come true.
Starting point is 00:08:48 Come at you fast. So why have you guys never seen a Fast and the Furious movie? Like you just didn't feel compelled? Because they're on their phones, these fucking Gen Zers. They're always on their phones. These kids nowadays. Because I got Snapchat on the brain. No, I...
Starting point is 00:09:07 I'm sending nudes to my BFF. I'm streaking on our streak. We've gone 106 days. I don't know. I think it's just like I was never... I listened to the first episode of the season. I know, Nicole, you were saying like you are into cars. So that was a draw for you.
Starting point is 00:09:25 I am not into cars. I am not like there wasn't anything. I also think I was too young when the first one came out to be like, oh, this is a new thing that's coming out for me. And then since then, it just it was something that none of it caught my interest in any way. Not even a big, thick, sweet potato-headed... Well, I did see the pacifier. See, I got my Vin Diesel fix in the pacifier. I'm like, he's great.
Starting point is 00:09:51 Wait, how old are you that you saw the pacifier but not Fast and Furious? I'm 25. That's there. Alright, that's... I just hit the cusp of being able to see the best environment talking to a 25 year old makes me realize that the pandemic was like eight percent of your life
Starting point is 00:10:13 that's brutal i'm so sorry at least you have more shit on the other end i'm coming down the home stretch i've only got a few more pandemics. Gabriel and I are going to die as soon as the pandemic's over. I'm not even going to get to hit my 401k, which I don't have either. I was just going to say, you have a 401k? I don't. I don't. Jeff, what about you? Do you have a 401k, Jeff?
Starting point is 00:10:37 I know Fast and Furious from the arcade game at the Solon Cinemas arcade in Solon, Ohio. What? What's that? Where is Solon, Ohio? It's where Kid Cudi grew up in Cleveland. Oh. And is it also where you grew up? It's adjacent to where I grew up in Sheridan Falls.
Starting point is 00:11:00 Okay. I went there because Kid Cudi grew up there. That's what it sounded like. I went there because they had the Tokyo Drift stand-up driving machine. Oh, heck yeah. I would play that. That sounds like fun. Be careful, Nicole.
Starting point is 00:11:15 I picture you being like, the Tokyo Drift machine arrived at my house today. Anything we bring up, you're like Googling how to buy it immediately. Yeah, I did buy the what is it Sabian Sabian the Sibian oh my god
Starting point is 00:11:29 congratulations it's not good no that's what I was gonna say I really didn't like I don't like it it's so hard would you say
Starting point is 00:11:35 you have buyer's remorse boo Ferris kick him off boo thanks so much for having me take the reins I guess I do have buyer's remorse well I appreciate Kick him off. Thanks so much for having me. Take the reins. I guess I do have buyer's remorse.
Starting point is 00:11:50 Well, I appreciate you re-gifting it to me. I'm going to get a lot of use out of it. Well, I was like, can I donate it to somebody? Like a woman in need? Leave it on someone's porch? Like, you need this, honey. Bring it to the new HeadGum studio and put it next to the NBA jam machine. And we should say Gabrus is in his childhood bedroom in Long Island.
Starting point is 00:12:09 I am. I am. It's changed hands like 11 times because I'm the oldest. So my brother lived here and then it was a guest room. Now it's, I guess it's back to a guest room since I'm technically a guest. There's a sun fade on the wall-to-wall carpeting of where an elliptical used to be. Yeah. There's a dried patch of jizz just offside the bed from when that brief period of time
Starting point is 00:12:28 before Gabrus discovered paper towels or socks. My God. I also love that there's two fans to cool off my big boy. And my mom's central air. And my mom's heavyset, too. So the house is like 44 degrees. It rules. Oh, what a dream it's like
Starting point is 00:12:45 walking around a meat locker i got out of the pool got in the house and i started freezing like t1000 i was like the water you started freezing like the opening scene where she like sprays whatever that is and then freezes off the oil truck spray it i don't have my hammer. Spray it anyway. There has to be a better way to do it than freezing it off. Before we get into the movie, we got to do the Toretto Gazetto. Of course. Everyone's favorite part. So F9 star Helen Mirren and Vin Diesel agree Michael Caine would make a great addition to the family. No way. and Vin Diesel agree Michael Caine would make a great addition to the family. While discussing the mysterious backstory of her character,
Starting point is 00:13:29 Magdalene Queenie Shaw, Oscar winner Helen Mirren, is it Mirren? Yep. Backed Diesel's proposal to bring Caine into the cast. She even suggested he could play her ex-husband. Mirren said, I don't know if I'm allowed to say, she's English, but apparently, is she? Is she English? Yeah.
Starting point is 00:13:47 No nuts. And you're doing an actually perfect impression of her. Vin had the idea of Michael Caine. I mean, wouldn't that be fantastic? That'd be so cool and absolutely perfect. So we'll see. So her character, Queenie, is an all-powerful criminal introduced in Fate of the Furious. She's the mother of
Starting point is 00:14:03 Dominic Toretetto's former enemies owen and deckard played by evans and uh jason statham respectively shaw of shaw she's mrs shaw yes she is yes shaw's mother which i don't think i tracked man you know, I truly, I just like accepted things as I watched these movies. Being like, yes, sure. That's a thing. Uh-huh. I remember that. Shoot.
Starting point is 00:14:31 The interpersonal relationships in this movie are just, they never, they make less and less sense as the movie went on. Oh, yeah. And they keep building. This is a quicksand foundation that they build all of the friendship dynamics on. Also, can we just pop back to the Torettoetto for a second yeah how is that news they're they're making the biggest franchise in the world like it would be cool if this famous actor joined everyone's like you guys are crazy it's like michael cain is gonna be in fast 10 now like there's never like why would he turn it down michael Caine does bullshit movies all the time but he's also so old
Starting point is 00:15:07 he might be getting picky and he's like in my late stage of life I'll only do what I want to do some people just want to watch the world burn Mr. Pareto okay we have to take a break and we're back so fast and furious is written by chris morgan directed by justin lynn hell yeah who has a hold on the franchise he has directed so many he is also uh lined up to direct 10 and 11. He directed 9. He directed 3, 4
Starting point is 00:15:48 and 5. 9 wasn't the last one. I thought with all the posters around, with all the family, the big hoopla, I thought it was like, and this is the end of the franchise. No, this franchise will never end. They're making one more two-part movie.
Starting point is 00:16:03 Yes, but also they might also making a lady spin-off yes that i really want to be in you gotta oh my god you gotta you need to be right like i could be the tyrese gibson you know comic relief part or let me be ludicrous uh you could it would be fun to have a female car expert like a female like mechanic head and you would be great at that wouldn't that be amazing watching you just yell at fucking paul walker's brother in a mocap suit no i'm just kidding that's offensive i also believe after watching fast nine and we'll talk about this in the 9th or 10th episode Of this podcast
Starting point is 00:16:47 But I believe they're trying to set up Young Toretto As well Who do you think would play Young Toretto? The guy who's in Fast 9 Playing Young Toretto He's an absolute fucking stud He's a better actor than Vin Diesel Oh my god
Starting point is 00:17:03 Gabers I'm so horny for this information you're gonna like you're gonna really like this ethnically ambiguous buff badass oh my god and i've been trying to do like my due diligence and not spoil anything for myself so like i'm not gonna look him up oh boy but i'm very excited oh boy So this movie was released April 3rd, 2009. And let's like, okay. So the beginning of this is wild. Immediately into what should be the climax of the movie. Jeff, okay, let's talk.
Starting point is 00:17:37 Jeff, let's talk about this. You just said what makes the Fast and the Furious franchise work for me so well. Is that they don't give you half fucking bullshit and then fucking get you the biggest one at the end. Although the end of this movie does fucking slap. Yeah, it's fucking sick. They open hot. It's bookended.
Starting point is 00:17:58 That's such a fun way to start a movie. And almost all of them start with some elaborate car race plan, shit like that. So this, to me, really felt like a second beat of the first movie it felt like they were erasing two and three and four is the actual sequel which i guess it is because tokyo happens at some point after like yeah this happens down this movie takes place Before Tokyo Drift Which is the third movie But also
Starting point is 00:18:29 It takes place after 2 Okay And right before 5 But also 5 and 6 take place Before 3 Wow Why do they call it fast and furious?
Starting point is 00:18:45 That's what I was thinking about for half of it. I just ripped my AirPods out laughing at that. That's genius. They're calling it ampersand on the fucking subreddit. Yeah, I would just go four fast, four furious. Four fast, four furious. Six fast, six furious. It works.
Starting point is 00:19:01 I would have just kept doing that. The opening was cool. for never having seen any of them I was hooked by the opening like that was an awesome sequence it was super fun it was like like I caught myself being like oh shit like a bunch of times it was fucking dope
Starting point is 00:19:16 they make Dominic Toretto like a Marvel superhero like with his physical capabilities but what I like about this movie is they spread the wealth they let like let it get on the fucking gas car like they let like the women and the minor characters do like so much fun shit in this movie like everyone is equally capable as a matter of fact that's another hallmark of these movies i i hate to keep calling out patterns everyone has superhuman strength every Every movie, everyone has gained like seven levels inexplicably
Starting point is 00:19:48 where it's like Ludacris isn't in this movie, but in the next one he's like the master hacker and Roman is like a cat burglar and Han is like a weapons expert. Giselle Bundchen is in the next. Not Giselle Bundchen. Gal Gadot. Gal Gadot rather.
Starting point is 00:20:02 Gal Gadot was in this. Gal Gadot's in this. Oh, that was Gal Gadot. Gal Gadot, rather. Gal Gadot was in this. Gal Gadot's in this. Oh, that was Gal Gadot. I was like, she looks slightly familiar to me, but I don't know and I won't look it up. Tee hee.
Starting point is 00:20:12 Never. I gotta record the podcast in five minutes. I don't have time to look it up. Ludacris took a certificate CS program at UCLA Extension and then returned to the crew. Yeah, he came back
Starting point is 00:20:22 knowing way more about C++. So, okay. They're hijacking fuel tankers. Again, this trucker pretty like, I gotta get to where I'm going. They're stealing loose oil. Unlike the truckers in the first one, he bails. He's like, I'm not going down with my truck. With his iguana.
Starting point is 00:20:41 I'm jumping out. But also, is gas like that hot of a like go to the fucking 76. They say in this, they're like it's gold here, baby. And I was like, what? Why? Also, how the fuck are you supposed to sell that on the black market? Like that's so
Starting point is 00:20:57 traceable. You just bring it like in jugs, we need gas. They know a shit ton of car guys they could probably pawn the gas off on someone but this was like a western right this was like a train robbery yeah and it was very they're in their horses it's all cowboy shit and it's just and it's a real fun way to open the movie and then they fucking just kill michelle rodriguez off camera so quickly like so quickly so they're like making out on that fucking cliff i fucking
Starting point is 00:21:27 love it and then she's in bed sleeping in a way i've never slept and dom's like staring at her like all moody and i'm like i fuck if they don't fuck i'm gonna be so mad and then i had to get mad i want to see his head left her yes i want to see penetration show trish please but then he leaves her and goes to pan City to work on cars, and it's very clear he doesn't know the language. Oh, again, just a recurring pattern is him speaking half-assed Spanish to Spanish native speakers and seeming like el jefe. He's always like, mi amigo.
Starting point is 00:22:03 And they're like yes Dom you know a word but honestly I can't talk enough about when Han says I guess we'll see what's going down in Tokyo I can't remember what exactly he said he literally says to Dom I hear they're doing some crazy shit in Tokyo
Starting point is 00:22:21 yes that's what it was it crushed me I laughed so hard it made me I crushed me. I laughed so hard. It made me, I was just like, this is so funny. It really feels like they edited out the line
Starting point is 00:22:31 where it's like, yeah, they're drifting. Oh, yeah, I think that is what they're doing. On the beach, the beach scene where they're just kind of all like, oh, we're partying around cars,
Starting point is 00:22:42 mid-drip over there. And then like, butt cheeks, cleavage. Cars on the beach. Bunch of nice cars in the sand. Their crew is there and they're all having a good time and then Han just like looks over at Vin Diesel and he's like,
Starting point is 00:22:56 and then he's like, alright. And then everybody knows to disperse so they can have a private conversation. Like, what is this level of non-verbal communication? It's perfect oh wait also in the first chase they're driving american cars and i was like in the first movie they drove foreign cars yeah and i was like are they making a switch to american cars because vin's his dad's car is like a i think it's like a chevy something dodge something yeah and uh i think dom loves the old american
Starting point is 00:23:27 muscle yeah brian loves the fast imports the little like jet yeah which is funny because in the first one he drove a mazda r rs rx7 yeah but he had his dad's he had his dad's muscle car like on ice okay so he was like I'll drive this import for now and then I'm gonna drive daddy's fucking American muscle. For a guy who likes American muscle cars, he smashes like three a movie
Starting point is 00:23:54 for nine movies. Truly. My God. I love him. I owe a million dollars to my dealership in revenge. Also that one character, he's just like,
Starting point is 00:24:05 muscle beats import every time. Oh my God. Just to keep you, just so you know the two types of cars they're talking about. Muscle imports. Muscles or imports.
Starting point is 00:24:15 So Mia calls Dom at a payphone. How do you get the number to a payphone? How do you know Dom's going to be there to answer it? I was about to say, how do you know Dom's going to be there to answer it? I was going to say, how do you know that at that moment?
Starting point is 00:24:27 She'd be like, can I talk to Dom? And they're like, of course. And then that little kid's like, of course. I know where Dom is. Also, who's answering pay phones? Yeah, rings nearby. Oh, I should probably check if this is for me. It doesn't make any sense.
Starting point is 00:24:40 So we find out Leti has been murdered. And I'm like, Lord. My fucking jaw dropped because I was like, she's in later movies. Yeah. So he goes to her funeral and watches from like 10 miles away and then goes to the crash site and finds nitromethane. He's like fucking Sherlock Holmes smelling the methane and then recreating the crash in his head. That was so fucking... Like watching her, like watching him, even though he wasn't there, but he's like, I know exactly how it happened.
Starting point is 00:25:15 It was a That's So Raven flashback. Truly. It was. Yes. It was very that. Wait, can we go back to the first chase? I'm so sorry. No, please.
Starting point is 00:25:24 At one point. Wait, can we go back to the first chase? I'm so sorry. No, please. At one point, so this fucking truck is going off the cliff, and then Letty and Dom are in the car, and there's a truck barreling towards them, and Letty's like, Dom, no, Dom, no. And he's like, no.
Starting point is 00:25:38 And then figures out, like, with the velocity of this thing coming at them, to, like, when to gun it, and then it tumbles over them and I was like no Dom it was so wild I like they established that Dom
Starting point is 00:25:53 can get his car to pop a wheelie so that becomes like an integral plot point at the end of the movie which I kind of like it's like Chekhov's muscle car wheelie establish it in the first act and it definitely gets fired by the last yeah they do sprinkle treats
Starting point is 00:26:09 throughout the movie that pay off in the end they're very good at that also the when he's having his little like detective psychic episode like replaying it all in his head when he goes to see is it Mia his sister
Starting point is 00:26:24 yeah he's like like there were burn marks on the replaying it all in his head. When he goes to see, is it Mia, his sister? Yeah. He's like, there were burn marks on the ground that could only be a result of natural meth, which is like a shortening for methane gas, which I did not know. And I was like, I turned to my friend, I was like, drugs? And then why does he go into an auto body shop
Starting point is 00:26:41 that I guess this guy sells meth? He goes to talk to Walter White. Jeff, you were watching you were expecting a very different film I mean that could be in the movie
Starting point is 00:26:51 like there could be a meth dealer who owns an auto body shop I appreciate this sequence where they show where they do the recreation
Starting point is 00:26:58 where he goes full mind palace like Sherlock I like it because I was mad that they didn't give Letty her like outro
Starting point is 00:27:04 like she's dead and you're like, what? On phone? It was so fast. And then it's kind of cool the way they do it. This is one of the first times you see it but it starts getting sprinkled in the movies more and more until Fast 9 features a full on abstract art
Starting point is 00:27:19 sequence. Truly, there's a minute long tone poem in the middle of Fast 9 and I can't wait until we get there. But this is the first one where it's like like truly like there's like a minute-long tone poem in the middle of fast nine and i can't wait till we get there but this is the first one where it's like this is sort of like meta physical and and it's like what is this movie isn't it for car meatheads and it's like now it's a guy visualizing his lover's car hitting him and he's like, I left her. I couldn't stop visualizing the script. I think Chris Morgan deserves to go to jail. This is also
Starting point is 00:27:54 because we touched on the funeral where he watched from like 10 miles away but him and Paul Walker both on opposite ends equidistant from the funeral. Like kind of looking at each other. They can't see each other both on opposite ends, equidistant from the funeral, like kind of looking at each other. Like they can't see each other, but somehow again, it's like they have a feeling that like a football field away,
Starting point is 00:28:13 the other is standing there. But it's like, and Mia's just in the middle, like, what the fuck? Like neither of them are here. Oh, that was so good. You say Chris Morgan needs to go to jail. I say Chris Morgan pulls off a fucking circus trick in getting Brian O'Connor and Dominic Toretto's characters to somehow be friends by the end of this movie,
Starting point is 00:28:36 despite their history. Up to including the part, which I have not completely, I never remembered until I saw it this time, that he blames her. He blames Brian for Letty's death. It's like, why are they best friends by the end of this movie? Yeah,
Starting point is 00:28:52 it is wild. It's like, so he infiltrated his group to try to bring them down, ended up kind of bringing them down and then like, let him go free. And then he blames her for letting, yeah, like they shouldn't be friends. like shouldn't be friends at all
Starting point is 00:29:05 yeah but he's got to do he's got to muscle them into a relationship because it's got it's going to be the foundation of the next two films three films yeah so uh we find out that the this grant this uh 1972 ford grand torino sport is owned by this
Starting point is 00:29:22 man named david park david park is the one using the nitromethane gas. So Brian is trying to track down him and this drug lord Arturo Braga. Braga. The man himself. He like, so oh then
Starting point is 00:29:37 Toretto tries to kill David but then Brian saves him and makes him an informant and then David and Brian get into a street race to help the investigation, which is like confusing to me. But then I was like, no. It's the second one we've seen.
Starting point is 00:29:52 It's an audition street race. We saw it in Too Fast, Too Furious. Because I thought they were like, whoever wins gets to drive for Braga. And so then Dom won, but then Brian also got the map. And so then they were both driving for Braga. And I'm like, wait, but Dom won. Well, it's because Dom won, but then Brian also got the map. And so then they were both driving for Brock. And I'm like, wait, but Dom won.
Starting point is 00:30:07 Well, it's because Dom won. Dom cheated and he won. But then Brian arrested the very effeminate man who was sucking on toes. So he could take his spot. That's why that scene was in there. Yeah, that's why they arrest that guy. And he's like, okay. So he took his spot. Yeah. That's how he got to get in there. that's why they arrest that guy and he's like okay charges they
Starting point is 00:30:25 don't have to spot yeah that's how we got to get in there that makes a lot more sense because the whole time i've just been thinking like what a weird loophole that they're like and now we both drive through that no one talked about and if it was the logic that dom cheated people died they fucking died so murdering people in this race. That's the role I would have wanted to play, is like the crazy guy who is hosting all these women at his apartment. He's like, I didn't do anything. Speaks in the third person.
Starting point is 00:30:55 Yeah. And he's like, oh, I love her so much. But all he was doing was sucking on toes. It was a choice. Yeah, it was a choice. I mean, that's the level of sexy this movie can be, is like triple kissing and toes. Can't show any boobs.
Starting point is 00:31:07 It's so choogly. But I just thought it was so funny that they picked the most effeminate seeming man to be the ladies' man. I know.
Starting point is 00:31:16 Yeah, why are they at his place? It was just, it was such a fun choice for me. Oh, also, I have to address a lot of people
Starting point is 00:31:23 have tweeted at me that the bad guy in too fast too fierce could be white because there are white like venezuelans there are argentinians because a lot of nazis left germany and hid in argentina and brazil and stuff and then had some babies and shit. So, you know, sorry about it. We're in the Nazi diaspora. We're sorry, but if that's what people really had to lean into and let us know. Yeah, they're like, I'm a Nazi!
Starting point is 00:31:55 Trust me, a lot of us white people ended up in Argentina. Sorry, sorry, sorry. My family had to escape Germany for not the sad reasons. Oh, okay. So, okay. My family had to escape Germany for not the sad reasons. Oh, okay. So, okay. My family had to escape Germany and you go, were they Jewish?
Starting point is 00:32:10 And they go, no. You go, oh. Oh, no. Right. No, we didn't have to escape Germany until after the war. It's like, oh. Got it. Got it.
Starting point is 00:32:20 Got it. I understand. Sorry, could you play your mascot, please? Interviewing to be a diversity inclusion consultant at Deloitte. Okay, so then Dom confronts Phoenix and learns that he's responsible for Letty's death. A standoff ensues, and Dom has somehow, I guess I missed the part where he made it so this car could blow up. Okay, yeah, I guess I missed the part where he made it so this car could blow up. Okay, yeah. I caught this.
Starting point is 00:32:46 He pops the nose, the hose off the nose, so the car starts filling with nose. And then he pushes in the car lighter, which will eventually pop out hot. Yes. Don't know if that's enough to cause a full-blown explosion. Domino effect. The domino effect. The Dominico Toretto. The Dominico Tretto well it fucking blows up like six fucking cars well first we see we establish the tunnels too
Starting point is 00:33:13 which is a very fun part of the movie is does that the tunnel driving yeah i'm sure dude the tunnel driving is wild holy shit because i'm, how do they know where they're going? Later on in the movie when Brian O'Connor's guessing where the false wall is, it's like, why wouldn't you just slow down a little bit at that moment? He's like, this might hurt. And I was like, just slow down. Don't slam into this. It all looks exactly the same.
Starting point is 00:33:41 He dives into another car and just kills a guy. He looks exactly the same. He dives into another car and just kills a guy. But when Dom gets shot and then the bullet wound in his shoulder changes him. He like is a changed man. He's like superhuman. He like turns around and is like, I'm going to fucking kill this man. And he's like, doof, doof, doof. He's like fucking hitting him.
Starting point is 00:34:04 And then he's like, get in the car. he's like fucking hitting him and then get in the car get in the fucking car stop hitting him get in the car it's like this is a wild it makes no sense why dom doesn't just kill that guy right there it would be probably better for them in the long run if that dude just dies there yeah but i do like they do a good job of somehow establishing in this there's 25 guys with guns two good guys and a bunch of fbi agents about to enter one good guy can use brian o'connor good guys and you know gray guys brian o'connor grabs a machine gun and somehow vin diesel's squared away with just five guys that don't have weapons so you know what i mean it's like wait oh yeah there's 25 armed guys we're the five without weapons hanging out closest to you dom and it's like all right he gets to do is like uh his fighting style is like street brawler meets like it's like a video game fighting
Starting point is 00:34:55 style where he does like suplexes onto cars and shit and it's like just the moment you get to see like oh now you're all in big trouble they like established dom like he's a dad and he's just beating these five kids like however he wants i mean it's like when you see him there there's a moment earlier which like felt like superhuman strength to me and it was really early on when he goes to the really back drag you but like when he goes to that shop to like talk to the guy like you're dealing the uh the whatever the nitrometh or whatever and then he's like i don't know man get your hands off me don't touch me again and then he pulls him onto a car he almost lets the engine drop on his head and at the last second just
Starting point is 00:35:36 stops it with his hand i loved it i loved it and i when he was like, just don't let this engine drop on my face. If he let go at that point, it'd be fine. Like that plus then the bullet. Like, I'm just like, this man is he can do anything. This is he can do anything. Yeah. I was like when when the bullet hit his back it at first i wasn't sure it was a bullet because of how little damage it did how little it affected him i thought someone
Starting point is 00:36:12 like threw a rock and it like turned like and then i'm like oh no he was shot and he's just like yeah what the fuck was that it was like the bullet gave him strength. It was just like strength juice that was shot into him. And I fucking loved it. Yeah. That happens with this movie a bit, with these movies, is that Dom has like emotional powers. Like if you upset him, he's extra strong. If you hurt him, if you hurt his family,
Starting point is 00:36:43 like he can't handle it. Well, that would give Dom superpowers. It's always like the mom who lifts the car off the baby is Dominic's full vibe in this movie. And he took that personally. The Dom who lifts the car off the baby. So they get into a Hummer with $60 million worth of heroin in it and i feel like this is the
Starting point is 00:37:09 first movie where it's like the stakes of the bad guys is high yeah heroin's like a heavy fucking thing the first movie we're stealing dvd players second movie we don't really know what the bad guys are doing the third movie there's just a mafia and we have no idea what they're doing just vague mafia yes a mafia but now we've named it it is drugs
Starting point is 00:37:35 so they drive it to the impound and then Brian's like you owe me a 10 second car and then which is a callback to other movies yes to the first movie because Dom's like you owe me a 10 second car and then which is a callback to other movies yes to the first movie because Dom's like you owe me a 10 second car so Dom knocks in the window of a car in a way
Starting point is 00:37:52 that I was like I don't know if you can really do that which is a callback to the second movie when Tyrese and I guarantee Vindy's a watch too fast too furious saw that Tyrese got the smash your window and was like when I come back and I'm the producer I'm smashing a window
Starting point is 00:38:08 without the shirt on my hand yes I'm serious and I'm doing bad cause Dom is tougher than fucking Roman oh my god it really it feels like that feels like you know when kids play make believe but they always want to one up each other
Starting point is 00:38:24 it's like well what you don't know is like, I, I actually don't need the glove on my hand. Cause I don't bleed when I hit glass. And what you don't know is that I can bullets. Give me, I'm actually, I'm actually bulletproof.
Starting point is 00:38:34 I'm at my guys. The heightening of each movie is like, well, what you don't know is I actually have a force field around my body. And that's, yeah, it truly feels like that so it really does it fully fucking does i love that and the car meetups is just show and tell
Starting point is 00:38:54 um so it's subaru impreza that he gets a wrx hatchback and they drive back to dom's house where they reunite with Mia. And then Dom finds out that Brian is indeed the last person to be in contact with Letty. So then they get into a huge fucking fight. And then we find out that Letty was working undercover as an informant in exchange for clearing Dominic's record because she wanted Dom to come home from Panama.
Starting point is 00:39:26 He also yells it at him. She wanted me to come home. I'm sorry, Dom. I'm sorry. It's so nuts. So many grown men take full on fucking ham fists to the face in this movie and are in the next scene. Just absolutely fine.
Starting point is 00:39:49 If I was a sound designer, I would want to work on these movies because it's like, alright, these punches really gotta sound intense. He's angry. But it's not gonna actually hurt anybody. He doesn't bleed. But then later in the
Starting point is 00:40:04 movie when he shoves the other like annoying FBI guy into the wall, it's the most blood in the movie. Oh, yeah. He gets so bloody. Shea Whigham
Starting point is 00:40:13 gets his ass handed. It's like smashing a fucking honeydew melon. Shea Whigham? The actor's name is Shea Whigham. I forget what his character's name is,
Starting point is 00:40:23 but I like that dude a lot. He's a good actor. You hear his nose shatter. Stajic is his name Whigham. I forget what his character's name is, but I like that dude a lot. He's a good actor. You hear his nose shatter. Stajic is his name. Stajic? The way he shoves his face into concrete might kill a person. Yes!
Starting point is 00:40:34 I thought he was dead. I'm like, well, that man, he's passed away. But I also love after it happened, nobody really reacted other than they were like, clean yourself up. And I was like, no. I'm not going to say you're okay. You're bleeding on my floor.
Starting point is 00:40:48 You okay? It felt really like my dad and me and my two brothers where he would come in and be like, what are you all crying about in here? And it's like, he punched me in the face. I punched him. He's like, just everyone knock it off and walks out. Like no real punishment of like, just everyone stop being an asshole. It feels like the FBI guy is like, all like, ah, just everyone stop being an asshole. Feels like the FBI guy's like, alright kids, just everyone
Starting point is 00:41:08 go to your rooms. While we're jumping around talking about characters, can I just pop in on Campos, who ends up also being Braga? That guy John Ortiz, who ends up, this is one of his early roles, he's in a shit ton of movies, but he's fucking good. He's kind of like,
Starting point is 00:41:23 yeah, I like him yeah he sells you as like the the sycophant right hand man when it's revealed that he's braga you're like he's he like changes his demeanor and becomes the boss and he does it fucking works no he was great yeah he's also fucking hot he does it for me i will say what they do is they fill this movies to the brim with just like the sexiest hottest men and i fucking thank them for it thank you justin and very few white men these movies i know i'm the white i'm the white guy talking about this all the time but they fucking cast the fuck like the phoenix uh laz alonso who plays like i thought he was hotter than the main guy right the guy who kills letty that guy's an absolute gorgeous man yeah yes
Starting point is 00:42:15 laz alizano he's very sexy oh he can like fucking oh i want him to just hurt me you know I want I want me off the bed yeah yeah I want Letty to break my arm in a fucking jujitsu arm bar so bad yeah I would watch everybody cast in this movie like just have an orgy now I'm just looking at pictures of this man he is now I'm just jerking off
Starting point is 00:42:39 I'm using Nicole's discarded Sibian talking about Lonzo Lonzo everyone in this movie is so hot and then plus like the coloring that they do to this movie
Starting point is 00:42:52 it kind of makes everyone is like a little bit dirty and a little bit sweaty it's like they've all been working on cars in every scene so plus the fact
Starting point is 00:43:00 they're already all baseline hot and then it looks like you've just met up with them outside of a garage. Yeah. Sunkissed. A little dewy with some sweat.
Starting point is 00:43:11 A little bit of grime. I know where I know Laz Alonzo from. He's on The Boys. Oh, yeah. His mother's milk. He's great on The Boys. The Boys is a great movie. Not movie.
Starting point is 00:43:22 A fucking TV show. Hell yeah. You watch The Boys? Yeah, I read the comic The Boys. Nobody watches The Boys. And I've been Not movie. A fucking TV show. Hell yeah. You watch The Boys? Yeah, I read the comic The Boys. Nobody watches The Boys. And I've been dying to talk about it with somebody. Buyer, I'll text you. No way this is Newcomer Season 5.
Starting point is 00:43:32 Yeah, let's do it. It depends if Lapkus has another big hobby that takes nine months to start. Big hobby. Big hobby. I've got a big hobby in my tummy. What's Season 5? Twilight? Harry Potter?ter no it's the boys i mean i fucking love the boys it's i love i love the boys juicy hot people
Starting point is 00:43:53 yeah everyone's sexy in that show and it's like they exploit them on purpose they really do and then like the wildest shit happens that i never see coming and i really anyway back to this so okay braga uh uh brian tells his superiors he's gonna lure braga into a trap in exchange for dominic's pardon i don't know why this recaps is dominic he is dom dom toretto so okay at the drop site brian plans to expose braga but then it's revealed that it's a decoy and the real Braga escaped to Mexico. And then Brian is removed from active duty, which is, is that something that's going to happen in every movie?
Starting point is 00:44:33 Like he's, he's going to be an FBI agent and then they're going to be like, sorry, man, you keep fucking up. I got news for you. If we want the spoiler, eventually they all are just working for like some sort of CIA organization. They're eventually all working for the working for like some sort of cia organization they're eventually all working for the american government in some capacity you know shadow organization it rules honestly they should tell improv students to watch these movies they heighten yes they just
Starting point is 00:44:57 heighten so so like incrementally so like it works it ends up up becoming like an ensemble Bond. They're like ensemble James Bond movies because they get so heightened and it's like stop nuclear fallout from happening to Earth. It's like let's send these eight street racers. I found out right before we recorded that the first one is them stealing DVD players. That's unbelievably funny. Yeah. Yeah. And the way that they can incrementally heighten to that and justify it is phenomenal. Trying to figure out who's stealing the VCR players is a big case in the first movie.
Starting point is 00:45:36 Oh, my God. Oh, wait. I meant to make this joke earlier. How 2007 is this movie that GPS is so, like, cool oh my god i love it obviously so new love it and when brian's like shut up rerouting yeah yeah yeah make a u-turn you gotta be fucking kidding me it's like the first gps like it's so obviously like there's this new tech that people use when they drive it's like yeah they show the map to go exactly oh my god after after dom wins they were like when the gps calls you answer and i was like that's not how they work it's not how they work it's not a phone and gal is the one
Starting point is 00:46:18 like giving out the gps's and there was a moment later that like i'm just remembering like and thinking of like wanting to see some Vin Diesel like action wanting to see Dom like fucking fuck someone he and like a gal is on the car and she's like she keeps asking like every scene she's like why aren't you into me like what kind of women do you like and he
Starting point is 00:46:37 like when he said he's like 80% devil 20% angel and he's like someone who's not afraid to get 80% devil, 20% angel. And he's like someone who's not afraid to get car grease under her fingernails. And she goes, that doesn't sound like me. And he's like, it ain't. It ain't.
Starting point is 00:46:54 And what? It's perfect. He loves Leti so much. He loves Leti. Yeah. He does. It is. Oh my god.
Starting point is 00:47:03 But honestly, I wish more men were honest like that. Like, I wish when I hit on dudes, they were like, 80% angel, 20%, you know, whatever. And I like a girl who's not fucking fat. And I'm like, okay, I got it. Thank you so much. I understand. Goodbye. If I said that on a first date, she would get a call from her roommate.
Starting point is 00:47:25 He's in trouble. She would take a 45 minute dump and you'd be like, she's been in the bathroom for a really long time. She would take her purse to the bathroom. Let's just say that. I also love that gal was honest too. She's like, that is not me.
Starting point is 00:47:40 Yes. More people need to be, honestly, the Fast and Furious franchise can teach so much. They should show that clip in like sixth or seventh grade and be like, you know, if the person's not who you want them to be, it's okay to tell them.
Starting point is 00:47:53 And then you have to understand that you're not the person they want. And then it would just make everything so much easier. They should have shown this in a sex ed class. They just show the girls triple kissing in the background. And this is hot What? Thank you They have to establish how much Dom loves Letty
Starting point is 00:48:13 And this is a little bit of a spoiler So that in six when she comes back with amnesia And is working for the bad guys He has to try hard to win her back No! She comes back and has amnesia and is working for the bad guys. Gabrus,
Starting point is 00:48:29 the best part is you tell me these things and then I go okay, but then when I see them in action, I scream. When I saw Han, I screamed. And then when he said the Tokyo thing, I screamed. I knew it was happening. You told me. And I screamed I knew it was happening you told me and I
Starting point is 00:48:46 couldn't handle it there's something fun about dropping these little connections to people who don't fully know about them because it yeah when you really start articulating the movie like if Fast 9 started with previously on the Fast and the Furious franchise you would be like this is insane if they tried to catch you up to how they got to nine, like with voiceover. And then of course they started working for Mr. Nobody, a shadow organization. And Deckard Shaw joins their crew after he kills Han.
Starting point is 00:49:17 I don't think so. I don't fucking think so. Oh my God. I've never been more excited to like get through movies. Like I had so much fun watching all of them I hated Tokyo Drift but the last five seconds of it I was like it made up for the
Starting point is 00:49:33 whole movie this one I loved tell Riley and Jeff why the last five seconds of Tokyo Drift so Vin Diesel and fucking Paul Walker are not in the movie instead this weird man with a weird southern accent has to move to tokyo you better believe little bow wow is fucking in it
Starting point is 00:49:51 they have to learn how to drift there's this weird woman from australia and it's literally insane it makes no sense at the end uh the main character who has a Southern accent is doing like a race. And then we see fucking Dom Toretto in the car next to him. And then he's like, I knew Han back in the day. What does he say? Fuck. He's like, I did some jobs with Han.
Starting point is 00:50:17 Yes. And then that's it. But you're like, yes, that's $800,000 for that. I want to make. and also not only that, but a promise to be in four, in the lead in four. And then I think he becomes a producer in five.
Starting point is 00:50:32 Insane. Yeah. Also, there are parts of the movie where Dom is talking and it is not indiscernible English. I mean, it's just. I mean, I had to turn the subtitles on for this film. Five minutes in, I'm like, I cannot understand a word anyone's saying. And I had to turn the subtitles on for this film. Five minutes in, I'm like, I cannot understand a word anyone's saying. And I had to turn the captions on because he doesn't move his mouth when he talks.
Starting point is 00:50:53 I think it's called grumblecore. Nice. Absolute insanity. It was really wild. I was turning the volume. I was blasting the volume on the TV. Every sound effect was so loud. And then as soon as it would cut to him,
Starting point is 00:51:10 he'd be like, I'm like, well, fuck me. I'm like blowing my ears out with the engine. Because, because Don Toretto understands peaks and valleys of what you're watching. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:51:21 You know, the actions, the height that you bring down and you ground it a little bit. You know, the action's the height that you bring down. And you ground a little bit to the numbers. And you know, you feel. Anyway, we gotta get through this. Okay. So they're traveling down to Mexico. And Giselle gives them directions to track down Braga.
Starting point is 00:51:38 And then they're going through these tunnels, which is fully fucking insane. And then what happens? Um, and then, uh, what happens? Oh, so then like, there's a crash. This,
Starting point is 00:51:50 this racing through the tunnels was truly insane. It was really fun. It's easier to shoot like, and keep it scary. I feel like because the POV works so much better. You don't have to see a lot of wide shots. So you can kind of like use editing to your advantage way more and i had a lot of fun in the tunnel the geography of like what when you're making these big action sequences is very hard to be like who's where and why yeah
Starting point is 00:52:14 they do it it's an okay job and once you're in the tunnel you kind of lose track of who's where but it's enough flashy cuts but for me the, this is why I love blockbuster films, specifically the Fast and Furious franchise. The shot leading up where they show the chase going into the fucking tunnel. It's like Mad Max. It's a helicopter shot of like 16 cars chasing two cars. And that looks so fucking, in the desert, exactly. It looks so cool.
Starting point is 00:52:45 There's nothing else in the frame but two dozen cars blowing through a huge desert. Yeah, that was dope. And just, I love, just put that money on the fucking screen. Yeah.
Starting point is 00:52:55 How much money did this movie, who gives a fuck? Pour it on the screen with like tons of cars just flipping. I love seeing like lifted trucks and Jeeps too because so much of the uh movies are like the low fast cars yeah but every once in a while they need
Starting point is 00:53:10 like special missions like in the first one here they get those tow trucks that flip open but here you get to see some of the bad guys the drug runners have like those super springy pickup trucks and i love watching the tow trucks come back in Hobbs and Shaw when they go to Samoa or Samoa. Samoa. One of the people on 90 Day Fiance says Samoa, so I say Samoa, but it's not correct. It's not correct at all. Farrah says 360.
Starting point is 00:53:37 The budget on this movie was $85 million and they used every fucking penny of it. It made $360 million. Which is fucking nuts. made more than 70 million in its opening weekend which is like wild also i gotta say the the cops coming that was also pretty dope looking and then oh yeah this fucking last scene with dom on the bus. First of all, I was like, this judge, excuse me, we had a deal. You know? He brings down this bad guy. Before we get to the judge,
Starting point is 00:54:10 one cool thing. I want to talk about how the stud dies. He dies in a very cool way. Oh, yes. He's about to shoot Brian, and all of a sudden Vin Diesel's got another muscle corner. He's got his front of the movie. This part makes you scream. He comes flying out of the mountain. He's got his like fifth part of the movie. This part makes me scream. He comes flying
Starting point is 00:54:25 out of the mountain. Does any wee. He's just bearing down on Phoenix. Phoenix turns to him, opens fire. He does the pop a wheelie so that the bullets
Starting point is 00:54:33 are hitting the bottom of the car rather than the windshield. And then you're like, he's just driving right at him. And you're like, why won't Phoenix get out of the way?
Starting point is 00:54:40 Phoenix goes to get out of the way and Brian grabs his ankle and holds him in place to get hit by a car that is so fucking cool that is like the ultimate wrestling tag team move yeah it really is but then and then dom kills him and then it's like you see phoenix slumped over the car and then the part that really just i was undone is it cuts back to Dom and he just goes pussy yes so bad I lost my
Starting point is 00:55:10 damn mind I was screeching I rewind I'm like I gotta see that again I mean these movies they're so fucking fun like and I do love that they started at a fucking 11 because we ended at like a hundred like that they started at a fucking 11 because we ended at like a hundred.
Starting point is 00:55:28 It was so much fucking fun. Yeah. Real quick, we have to take a break. And we're back. So this film was not well received critically. It is a 28% on Rotten Tomatoes, which I think is incorrect. Fuck Rotten Tomatoes. Rotten Tomatoes is broken.
Starting point is 00:55:56 Uh-huh. So a critic from Time Out wrote, turn off your mind. Turn off your mind, though. And there is some fun to be have uh from some of the better whiz bang sequences what i don't fucking know what that means i think it's a perfect movie i thought it was a real throw to the original movie yes and i kind of think that was so good nicole it's funny you say that because i feel like when you zoom out and look at the entire franchise that was sort of the plan and i would imagine they were like all right we got vin and paul walker in this movie let's lock it in and do like it's a heightened version of uh the first movie and that'll re-ground us
Starting point is 00:56:36 in what the premise of these movies are and and i think it works and then in five they shift the entire premise of the movie kind of like the attitude that it comes from but they've earned it you'll see you'll see it's it's just a really and that's why it's my favorite movie they do such a good shift uh before we talk about any other trivia do we just want to talk about how cool the ending of this movie is so sick it's like it's a bookend it's like such a great it's perfect dominion he's on the prison. He sent us to 25 years without parole. With no option for early parole. He's in his orange fucking jumpsuit.
Starting point is 00:57:11 He looks fucking good. It plays with the olive colors in his skin tone. He looks incredible. It's a Big Bud Press coverall outfit. I'm like, this was fitted to your body. That very few people will get. But Big Bud Press, organic stuff, made in Los Angeles, very cute. Anywhere east of the 101, you know what I'm talking about.
Starting point is 00:57:31 Or the way I know Big Bud Press is that a lot of the kinds of models that I like to look at wear Big Bud Press. A little curvy. My kind of ladies wear those kind of big clothes. I'm here for it. My kind of ladies wear those big clothes. I'm so familiar with certain brands because it's like the models on Instagram are like, I'm wearing this.
Starting point is 00:57:58 Yes, you are. You're wearing it. Yes, you could be. You're wearing the shit out of that fashion, Nova. They added a sundial. So, okay, some trivia. Due to Universal Pictures moving the release date up from June 12th to April 3rd, Jesus,
Starting point is 00:58:15 composer Brian Tyler only had three days to record the orchestra. That's the score. That's insane. And I'll say this. It shows. It it shows it's not enjoyable at all it's not a it's not a you don't we don't go like the score of this movie ruled like you don't remember it you don't remember it at all no that's a very tyler perry move
Starting point is 00:58:36 does it say why they moved it up because that's not just like a week that they really something bigger was being released in the summer. So it's like, you have your summer tentpole movies, and then you're like, oh shit, this might not do well, so you move it up to the spring. Well, hey, then they made $360 million. Yeah, whatever they did, they made the right choice.
Starting point is 00:58:57 Good move. So we already said it, but Fast and the Furious outgrossed the Tokyo Drift in its first fucking weekend alone, which is very funny and that's the power of Vin Diesel and Paul Walker that is a magic chemistry that we will see be
Starting point is 00:59:13 that made these movies literally the movie leaves the two of them for two movies and you're so ecstatic that they come back together that's like a true charisma friendship on screen yeah dynamism in some way it's so fucking cool i agree i love it it was such it was so nice to see them all together um also i like that they let mia drive in the end yeah does she drive me as a doctor
Starting point is 00:59:39 and a driver it turns out wait she's a doctor well Well, she's the one who repairs Dom's bullet hole. He goes, I gotta get you to a doctor. JK, it's your sister, but she's good at doctor shit. Trust me, we play doctor every weekend. Oh yeah, then they fucked on the counter while Dom was in the garage. We didn't see them fuck, but we knew what happened.
Starting point is 00:59:59 We heard it, though. You heard Trish, right, Riley? I think we all heard Trish. I think we all heard it, though. We heard Trish. That was because she was like weeping. You heard Trish, right, Riley? You heard Trish. I think we all heard Trish. I think we all heard it. Okay, well, we've come to the end. Next week, we're watching Fast Five. Yeah! I'm really excited about it.
Starting point is 01:00:18 Me too. I fucking love these movies. They bring me joy. I was smiling ear to ear watching the whole thing. Jeff, Rileyiley do you guys have anything you want to plug uh can i just run a stand-up joke by you god damn it yeah it's related yeah god it better be cobs and slaw the fastest barbecue sides ever honestly it works in this context because we're talking about it.
Starting point is 01:00:46 Yeah. But you would have to explain that to an audience. Now, I'm not as well-versed in stand-up as Byron. That's my opener and closer. It's my type one. It's 10 seconds of saying it
Starting point is 01:01:00 and 50 seconds of a standing O. Well, I say you can work it. I know you're touring opening for Louis C.K. this summer, so maybe you can test out your material there. Special guest, I'm not supposed to announce it, but Delia's going to be at the Albuquerque show. And Jeff is solely doing Fast and Furious material.
Starting point is 01:01:18 In between movies 9 and 10 when it's completely out of the zeitgeist, hoping people... I mean, that's... I'm truly... This is my life. I'm like all I want to talk about is Fast and the Furious and it happens like once every three years
Starting point is 01:01:29 that everyone is talking about it. And then they asked me to fill in for Lapkus on Newcomers and I was like, more screaming about Toretto! Oh my god. I mean, it's fucking delightful. I'm truly having a great time. You didn't waste your plugs.
Starting point is 01:01:45 Don't waste your plugs on Jeff's jokes. I'm so sorry we wasted Jeff's plugs on a cops and slaw joke. We have our HeadGum show, Review Review. It's R-E-V-I-E-W-R-E-V-U-E. And Jeff, do you want to plug HeadGum? Yeah. Review Review is an improv comedy podcast based on Yelp reviews. It's a lot of fun.
Starting point is 01:02:08 Gabrus has done an episode so if you want an intro to that. Nicole you're always welcome on the show. I know you're really busy. And then I also have some show problems. I mean I would do it but like I have four podcasts that I have to record on the weekend now. Two or three TV shows?
Starting point is 01:02:26 Yeah, I'm working full time. I'm a little, yeah, on my break from the show, like Grand Crew, the show I'm on, I'm shooting Wipeout. And it's going to be fun. It's a lot. My roommate's the showrunner's assistant on Grand Crew. He says to say hello. Oh, Dylan Mason, hello.
Starting point is 01:02:45 He's really excited about it. Tell him Nicole did her famous Helen Mirren impression for him. Hell no! And I fucking crushed it, baby! Baby! And then I also host a show called The HeadGum Podcast, which is like a British panel show
Starting point is 01:03:01 of some sort with a lot of bizarre, uncomfortable quizzes and games. It's kind of Hollywood handbooky between two Fernsie and Gabrus. You got to come on. You got it. It would be fun. Yeah. Pass.
Starting point is 01:03:13 Not nearly as busy as buyer, but I'm too busy for that bullshit. You're a vacation boy. I'm supposed to see my family for the first time in 18 months and I've already taken two hours away to watch Fast and Furious. And then another two hours away to scream about it. To fucking talk about it. Tell your mom I said hi.
Starting point is 01:03:31 Where's Uncle Mommy? I fucking love your mother. Please tell her I said hello. She's a huge fan of yours. Give Tiff a hug for me. I love her too. You picked some great ladies. You picked some great ladies in your life.
Starting point is 01:03:43 Your mom. Wow, I can't believe you picked your mom. One of the best. I found a great vagina to come out of and another one to come into. That's the worst sentence I've ever heard. Eventually that takes the cake. That's my opener
Starting point is 01:03:57 and closer. I'm touring with Jeff Ross. Gabrus, find a man for me in New York. Where are you? Long Island? I got you. Yeah, I'm in Long Island. There's a lot of buff tan guys in your style. Find me one and tell them that they gotta move to LA. You got it. Okay.
Starting point is 01:04:15 If you write a nice review reviewing, oh, this is right in reviews. So this person, nice said this season will go too fast and I'm furious about it the latest season of newcomers is so fantastic it momentarily made me forget a tornado ravaged our property destroyed our roof and decimated our garage god bless I hope you're okay Nicole and Gaber's is joy and reveling in these movies is contagious and has been such a needed bright spot and otherwise terrible week.
Starting point is 01:04:47 I've always enjoyed the show, but the last season is some, the latest season is something special. I'd pick up a brush, deal with insurance claims or do any other menial miserable tasks willingly. If I had these two efforts, effort, but two F's like the movie always to,
Starting point is 01:05:03 to listen to for a while, a little heart. Well, thank you so much. If you write us a review, I'll read it. I'll stumble through it like I did that one. Here, let me read one real quick. This is from Meat Mug. He says, big fun, vroom vroom.
Starting point is 01:05:16 Solid review. Thank you for putting that in the notes. Big fun, vroom vroom. I love it. All right. Well, that's it We'll see you next week With Fast Five
Starting point is 01:05:27 And I'm fucking jazzed about it And maybe I'll have a boyfriend From Long Island Oh I got you You'll be getting some Long Island dick And we will be going From directly the end of this movie
Starting point is 01:05:37 We're gonna go jump One second in time At the beginning of Fast Five I can't wait I can't fucking wait Can't wait for that And my Long Island Ice D.
Starting point is 01:05:47 Nice! Long Island Ice D. That's such a nice bike. Thank you. That was a Hidgum Original.

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