No Such Thing As A Fish - 490: No Such Thing As Whistling At A Fact
Episode Date: August 3, 2023Dan, James, Andrew and Cariad Lloyd discuss valuable wool, recycled stool, Suffragettes and PDFs. Visit nosuchthingasafish.com for news about live shows, merchandise and more episodes. Join Club F...ish for ad-free episodes and exclusive bonus content at apple.co/nosuchthingasafish or nosuchthingasafish.com/patreon
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Hi everyone, welcome to this week's episode of No Switch Things A Fish where we were joined at the Soho Theatre in London by the incredible Carried Light.
Now if you are a regular listener to No Switch Things A Fish, you will know of course who Carried is. She's a very good friend of ours, she's a comedian, she's an actor, she's a podcaster, she's just an out. It's called You Are Not Alone.
It's about death, but that sounds like it's going to be depressing, but it really isn't.
It's extremely uplifting that book and there's loads of facts in there as well.
It's definitely one that I think you'll really, really enjoy.
And the other thing to say is that Carrier does an improvised show called ostentatious.
Now, this is a really amazing show.
What happens is you turn up,
someone in the audience gives them a hit or two last,
let's say Jane Austin play title that they've made up.
The guys have never heard it before
and they do an entire Jane Austin play completely improvised.
It is absolutely stunningly brilliant.
If you haven't seen it, you can't miss it.
If you have seen it, go again
because it's different every single night.
And they are about to do another run at London's West
and at the art theatre.
Now, the best way to find out about those tickets
is to go to ostentatiousimpro.com.
That's a-u-s-t-e-n-t-a-t-i-o-u-s-i-m-p-r-o.
But let's be honest, who types in URLs these days?
Just go to a search engine, search for ostentatious,
and you will find all the information there.
Anyway, really help you enjoy this week's show
with Carrier Blight.
All that's left to say is on with the podcast. Do you know what that whore was like?
Do you know what that was?
Do you know what that was?
Hello and welcome to another episode of No Such Thing as a Fish, a weekly podcast this
week coming to you live from the Soho Theatre in London!
CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
My name is Dan Schreiber.
I am sitting here with James Harkin, Andrew Hunter Murray,
and Carrie Adloyd.
And once again, we have gathered around the microphones
with our four favorite facts from the last seven days,
and in no particular order, here we go,
starting with fact number one, and that is Andy.
My fact is that the maximum PDF file you can send
is bigger than Belgium.
LAUGHTER
CHEERING
Can we replace Belgium?
Yeah.
Just with a PDF.
Old Belgium.
Yes, you can. OK, in fact, it's bigger than that. It's a PDF. Old Belgium, yes. You can.
OK, in fact, it's bigger than that.
It's a... OK, right.
The maximum PDF size, you can send,
it's a square with size that are 381 kilometres long.
That is bigger than Belgium, Monaco, San Marino,
Liechtenstein, Malta, Andorra, Luxembourg,
Montenegros, Slovenia, Albania, and Moldova combined.
It is huge!
That's massive.
It's mega! Has anyone sent something that big?
Unclear.
Unclear.
So, yeah, I worked out that if you wanted to print it out on A4 paper,
I would take 2.3 trillion pieces.
Oh.
And if I did it on my printer at home,
and I could have started it off at the time when the
first human fossils were appearing in the fossil records, and it would be just about finishing
now.
No.
Subject to jams and cartridge replacements.
That's brilliant.
That's incredible.
That's so good.
Yeah.
I should say where I got this from.
I saw a guy called Steve Bobrick put it up on Twitter and basically, and we should say,
this is only, this appears to only be an Adobe Acrobat limit.
Damn them controlling us as always.
Theoretically, there could be a bigger PDF out there.
What?
I know.
So, this is what in the Adobe rules, it says that this is the maximum you're allowed
or something. Yeah, it's the Adobe Acrobat. that this is the maximum you're allowed or something.
Yeah, it's the Adobe Agarre.
It's 15 million inches by 15 million inches.
You know?
Oh, yeah.
It's just the rules.
It's not even...
No, it's their internal limit, but the file format itself might not be bound by the Adobe
Revolver.
They would probably just have to click and write 25 million and maybe we'll be able to
get it.
Maybe, maybe.
But I don't think anyone's ever actually sent one
that's this big.
No, why would you?
He'll be insane.
Is that an email attachment?
Or are we talking we transfer here?
We transfer.
Oh, I think that's a drop box.
I don't think you can reach out to that.
So PDFs?
Yeah.
Pretty dry.
LAUGHTER
Pretty dry. It's amazing.
When we send each other our facts round, we have to then go and research them of course.
And the sensors, the PDF, and said, maybe it's the most boring fact you've ever sent.
Yeah.
And James said, it's not even close.
Not even a top 10.
But we can get onto more general stuff.
But I do just want to say that Adobe,
you know, Adobe Acrobat the programme that do the PDFs,
is named after some mud.
Name after mud.
And some mud.
Oh, Adobe is a building material, isn't it?
It is.
And they care about like poo and wool, I think.
Oh, here is mud.
It's just... James, don't attempt poo and wool. I think. Ah! Here is Mud.
James, don't attempt Pooh and Woll.
I'm being like, this is it, we can make a house.
That's the worst three little pegs ever.
And the fourth little peg made his house out of Pooh and Woll.
And the Wolf said, I'm alright, actually.
You guys, you stay in there, it's fine.
I should just explain the mud things, sorry, I want to put it in there.
Otherwise, I could feel the tension in the replay.
All they were waiting, they were just...
When's he going to explain about the mud?
The founder of Adobe. I'm sorry.
You thought you could to lie, Pockert.
This is a conference for Adobe.
And this is how they get their employees in.
There's a creek which goes past the home of the founder
who's called John Warlock and it has this mud in it.
It's this very malleable clay.
I did go on a little while, Gusjah,
trying to find out who the original Adobe Acrobat actually was.
There wasn't one, there wasn't.
Right.
That would make it an interesting story.
OK, and so you named it after the mud.
It's a mud.
It's a mud by the... Yeah, exactly, yeah.
But it's malleable, but PDFs are... Famously inflexible, you're right. It's a mud by the... Yeah, exactly, yeah. But it's malleable, but PDFs are...
Famously inflexible, you're right, it's a big, untangable.
Ah!
Are you just like, I'm just sending you paper,
like, why did you think, oh yeah, this clay,
this reminds me of my...
An acrobat, so flexible as well.
Yeah, yeah.
Everything is...
We've absolutely wide open this.
The rules, the idea that this is what they would say,
this is the limits to what you have.
I find it quite funny when there are computer rules The rules, the idea that this is what they would say, this is the limits to what you have.
I find it quite funny when there are computer rules
that just are just so makeshift and sort of seemingly
why would you ever say that out loud.
Apple 3, I don't know if anyone is old enough
to remember Apple 3, but so it was their third.
No, wait, Apple 3 was the third.
What?
This is crazy.
No, so yeah, it was a hard drive, basically,
that suffered because there was no fan on it.
And Steve Jobs had this thing where he just hated
the sound of fans.
And so he was like, let's not include one.
Yeah, and so it overheated all the time.
And when it overheated, it meant that any disc going in
would suddenly just melt.
And so you're pulling out the hard-core disc and so on.
Yeah, so it was a big, big problem.
And one of the employees of Apple was so angry with it,
that he slammed it down out of frustration onto his desk
and discovered that that made it work again.
So if you called up Apple saying it does not work,
their official line was lifted up, lift the computer up
by two inches and just drop it on the table. Their official line was lifted up, lifted the computer up by two inches
and just drop it on the table.
And that's what fixed it.
That was the official line that came from them.
Because of maintenance, they call that, don't they?
What's that?
Just whacking something and hope it works.
Oh yeah, right, yeah, yeah.
I don't think we've mentioned this before.
We might have done.
Do you know what the longest a computer has been left running
is, or the longest running computer?
I haven't had my laptop since 2016.
For real? Seven years?
Seven years?
Two, two, just rest, it's asleep, then it wakes up again.
Yeah, yeah.
Nothing works.
Do you mean what, even closing the lid?
I reckon this one might not even have a lid.
Whoa.
Right.
James is right.
I didn't, and I was about to say the longest,
uh, like, running computer on Earth,
but then I didn't say that.
Mmm. Clue. So it's computer on Earth, but then I didn't say that. Hmm.
Clue.
So it's not an Earth.
That's right.
Right.
Is it at a spaceship?
It's in a spaceship.
It's the Voyager ones.
The Voyager ones.
The Voyager ones, which have been on since,
well, more than 40 years now.
The 70s, I guess?
Yeah, the 70s, yeah, yeah.
And so...
They're still working.
They're still working. It's a pair of link computers on board Voyager,
which just sent towards the edge of the solar system.
And it's still going, each one has 70 kilobytes of memory.
I mean, they're really tiny.
Are they like 1970s computers, though?
They're like, oh, what's going on?
They're not room-sized, though.
They're much more...
If they start working, they'll slam them into Pluto, aren't they?
Yeah.
They've got a big monitor,
and you have to run like CSDOS on it. Yeah, yeah. But aren't they? They've got a big monitor, and you have to run C.S. DOS on it.
Yeah, yeah.
But no, they had a...
I know some things about computers.
This really big problem in 2015,
because the last of the original programmers
was a guy called Larry Zotarelli, and he retired.
And they were stuffed, because you need to learn ancient
Cuneiform or computer languages.
Right. To get this. Like, no oneuneiform or computer languages. Right.
To get this.
No one is teaching these computer languages.
He's still alive, not dead. Just call him up.
He's retired. He's retired.
He doesn't want to be...
Get it to write a hand over sheet.
Yeah.
But people know.
I'm sure Nassen knows about that.
He's like, no, I'm done. That's it.
I've had my time.
It's hard. It's hard to learn the systems required.
No, okay.
Yeah, all right.
There was a computer that analyzed 4,000 computer science papers,
and it came up with what they call the best computer scientist in the world.
They describe them as the Michael Jordan of computer science.
Do you know who it is?
No.
It's Michael Jordan.
It's someone with the same name or as it is? No. It's Michael Jordan. LAUGHTER
It's someone with the same name or as it is.
Yeah, it's got the same name.
The Michael Jordan of Computer Science is Michael Jordan.
Everyone calls your kids Michael Jordan.
That's clear. It's non-mintive determinism.
Just Michael Jordan. Wow. That's really fun.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Do they refer to Michael Jordan as the Michael Jordan of basketball?
LAUGHTER Have you had a Fernando Corbato? Do they refer to Michael Jordan as the Michael Jordan of basketball? LAUGHTER
Have you had a Fernando Corbato?
LAUGHTER
I can't tell until you've been out sit properly.
What did he do?
LAUGHTER
I want to be the Fernando Corbato of something, man.
Yeah, well, he was the Fernando Corbato of...
He died in 2019, he was 93 years old,
and he invented something we all have. Oh! And we've got loads of them. Oh.
personalities. Daddy issues. Daddy issues.
Not yourself closer to the topic at hand. I'll go for Transistors.
No?
Passwords.
Oh, these are the main ones.
They invented the computer password.
Oh, is his mother's maiden name?
Michael Jordan.
Michael Jordan.
But with the numbers changed for the letters.
I think it was the 50s that he invented it.
And it was because most computers
worked on one thing at a time, because they
were the size of rooms.
And they were, you know, they had processing power,
but not much. And he was trying to work out a way thing at a time because they were the size of rooms. And they had processing power, but not much.
And he was trying to work out a way, like a time share system,
so lots of people could work on the same computer, different tasks.
And so he just reasoned that that's the best way of hiding
your files from each other inside the computer.
And I've entered that.
Yeah.
In 2003.
That is, you're right.
It was a 65.
But the thing is, we don't whistle at facts anymore.
Well, wait, I mean...
It's just, it's not okay.
I'm sorry, I don't want to be a downer.
Actually, Carried, it made me feel empowered.
There's always one working against the movement, what can I say?
In 2003, a survey found that 90% of office workers passing through Waterloo Station
would give away their computer password in exchange for a buy-row.
Just a buy-row, not even a chocolate.
Another survey in 2003 found that 70% of people would do it in exchange for some chocolates.
I do. 100%. 34%.
34% of people just gave their password without even needing the bribe.
So what's your password?
They just told them.
That's so good.
But that was in the past when you only needed like four, right?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
I know, yeah.
So I mean, there's no way you can even remember them.
Yeah, that's amazing.
I got a quick story about a Microsoft laptop that there was a mystery.
It kept crashing.
This is 2005.
So the culprit of the problem was Janet Jackson.
Is it the real Janet Jackson?
The real Janet Jackson.
And it was her song, Rhythm Nation.
Oh.
And what it was is that the frequency of it was at such
the same level of which the disc was spinning
that it would send the disc
into a wobble, and it would crash. And even if rhythm nation was playing from one laptop,
but being heard by another laptop.
Oh my god. That would crash as well.
Like dog whistles, they've just been like, is it me?
Yeah, yeah, exactly. So, yeah. So, Janet Jackson was responsible for a whole software update
or whatever of a Microsoft laptop.
She's constantly innovating.
She is.
You, do you know the, you won't know this, but can you guess?
The picture...
What is it? What is it?
No.
We need more, we need more.
That was almost a sentence, but not quite.
I'm sorry, sorry, sorry.
So the picture, which has the most pixels in it,
so the image that has the most pixels in the world,
has 102 terror pixels in it. So the image that has the most pixels in the world has 102 terror pixels.
Okay.
Um.
Oh.
Security!
Security!
No.
No, come on now.
It feels nice, doesn't it?
No, no, that did not feel nice.
That was, that fact was just minding its own business.
Okay, get ready to whistle.
Okay.
Can you guess what the picture is of? Belgium.
LAUGHTER
Is it, like, Tetris, just in your teaser?
Or is it, like, very pixelated?
No, it's pixelated in the fact that it has a lot of pixels in it.
But it's not like OK.
But basically, if you made it really small, it would be really clear.
That's the point.
I'll say a big telescope thing, like the universe.
Mona Lisa. Oh, gosh, no. It is the world's the point. I'll say a big tell us something like the universe. Mona Lisa. Oh, gosh. No.
It is the world's biggest penis. Wow.
Well, welcome to the whistle. This is yours, my big partner.
Wait, do you mean it's the world's biggest picture of a penis?
All the world's biggest penis.
Clarify, we need that.
It's a picture of a normal size penis, but it's the world's biggest image.
And what's a normal size penis?
Sounds me for a friend.
Oh, damn.
So many issues.
If they made each pixel one...
That's not normal size penis.
That's the one.
That also wasn't really an inch, but we'll go into that.
If you made each pixel an inch,
it would wrap around the earth 2.7 times this image.
And if you...
Oh, yeah.
If you are printed it out to the same specs as a billboard, it was based on 16,408 Empire
State buildings.
Right.
And if you 3D printed that, you'd be able to poke the International Space Station.
LAUGHTER
And you need permission before you do that.
OK.
It was invented by a former NASA intern
who does not wish to be identified.
LAUGHTER
MUSIC
Stop the podcast. Stop the podcast!
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We need to move on to our next act, guys.
It is time for fact number two, and that is Carrier.
Carrier.
During the 17th century, when you died,
your relatives were legally forced to bury you wearing wool,
whether you liked it or not,
and there was for no other reason
than to support the ailing wool industry.
I love this fact, OK?
So basically, there was an act by Parliament in 1666
that overnight said everybody has to be buried in wool.
And it sounds like, oh, OK.
But previously to that, nobody was buried in wool, ever.
Ever.
That was like an unusual thing to happen. You were buried in a linen shroud like Jesus in the Bible
And no coffin no coffin, right? Sometimes they did have coffins
Sometimes they're no coffins. Yeah, it was unusual. Yeah
But it was very you would mostly be wrapped in a shroud and just shoved in the earth. Yeah
Yeah
And because the wool industry was so important and they were so worried about
linen coming from France,
basically, classic fucking French linen coming over here,
taking our coffins.
The government basically said, I know.
I always knew your GP news show coming on.
Listen, the British world, I am sweating, but I am British.
So so many people employed in the wool industry,
12% of the population worked in the wool industry,
and it bought in a huge amount of money.
So they said, well, we'll just make it a law
that you have to be brought in a wool suit
in a coffin lined with wool.
And if you weren't, you will find five pounds,
which is the equivalent of 550 pounds today.
Yeah.
So, and you had to then, because so basically basically initially everyone was like, no, fuck you, why
would we, where are we going to get this from?
No one has this, we'd have a history of this.
And like the linens they used to wrap them in would be like your family linen, you know,
so you would have something that's been like a tablecloth and you would keep it or
night and then you would sew them together, the women would sew it together and wrap
everything up.
So it's like a very like nice thing. And so people weren't following the law. So then they made it that you had
to go to the keeper of the piece. Two members of your family had to sign an affidavit saying,
we have done this otherwise you'd be fine. So you have to go to the church and swear,
like based on the Bible, we buried them in the world, sorry.
Yeah, there's an opportunity to read, right? Yeah, special oath, which I've got here saying, no corpse or any person, except any person
that shall die of the plague, fuck them.
LAUGHTER
That's because they thought it lived on in the world.
Shall we bury it in any shift, sheet or shroud,
or anything whatsoever, made or mingled
with flax, hemp, silk, hair, gold,
or silver, in any stuff or thing?
Other than what is made of sheep's wool only, that's...
Yeah. And they had to save it.
But the fine that you mentioned, the five pound fine.
Yes, five pound fine.
If you grasp someone up as being buried in non-wool,
then you could get half of the five pounds.
Yep, you could get half of it.
And this is the really clever thing,
if you had buried your relative in linen
and you knew that you were likely to be caught
anyway, you could go and grass up on your own relative, get half the fine, back into the
family, you've only paid half the fine.
Did they do that?
Yeah, they did.
Which people did that?
So some people who are like, there were certain areas where it was very much, didn't,
they didn't approve of it.
And so which people would be like, well, fuck, it was just, you know, one of the rules
was you couldn't bury in gold.
Yep. So I think if you're burying someone of the rules was you couldn't bury in gold. Yep.
So I think if you're burying someone in gold,
probably you can afford the five pounds.
Yeah, yeah.
Yeah, exactly.
So there was a study that was done between 16, 17, 18, 17, 0, 7,
Lesson 1% and this was in Hensridge.
Yes.
Lesson 1% of burials in the church yard were in linen,
so following this rule.
But then when you went inside the church itself,
it was between 9% and 13% that were then
in the real people.
And then the richer people here in the church.
Yeah, yeah, obviously.
One interesting part of this is that, okay,
so you started to have loads more extra linen
and a lexical cloth around because you were using
the wool for the burials.
And newspapers were made out of recycled cloth.
So that's why you call it a rag now,
because they used to use the rag's turn into paper
and then make newspapers.
And so they had all of these extra bits of linen,
which meant they could make more newspapers.
And there was a huge boom of newspapers around that time.
And this sort of fed into that.
They were pleased about it.
Everyone else was pissed off.
And there's amazing, have you heard of Decker Mittford?
And I've talked to you guys about her before.
Yeah, one of the Jessica Mittford.
Jessica Mittford, the Mittford sisters,
who were like these socialite 20th century British figures
who were involved in every single thing that happened.
She went to America.
She was a communist.
She went to America, kind of disowned her family.
In the 60s, she wrote this book called
An American Way of Death. OK. It was very odd, because she was a communist, she went to America, kind of disowned her family. In the 60s, she wrote this book called An American Way of Death.
OK.
It was very odd, because she was a British socialite
that had gone to fight in Spain and then moved to America,
very unusual story.
But the book that she wrote basically
changed the American funeral industry,
because what was happening was they were just basically
rinsing people for money.
And when someone died, they used to kind of perform
plastic surgery on them,
and then barmed them, and so make them look,
I mean, or she describes, like, basically,
nip and tup the tissue across the body
with implants, pins, and fillers,
to mask blemishes and swellings
that come with agent illness,
before sowing the face into the most attractive
and youthful expression possible.
Sowing it.
Teeth were whiteened, makeup applied,
and the corpse was dressed in its final outfit.
I mean, yes, I would like all of this.
Yep.
Sorry.
There was a special kind of bra designed for post-mortem form restoration.
I'll pass on that.
Yep.
So she wrote this book, it's so easy.
Why is a Hentian a bra just part of the package?
We are.
She wrote this amazing book that exposed, basically, they were praying on the vulnerable.
So these poor people who had no money would end up paying
thousands of dollars, but what was considered a proper funeral.
And her book was, like, in the best cellars for years,
David Bowie listed it as one of his favourite books,
Top 100 books, because she changed everything.
And they were putting so many chemicals in at that time.
It was so dangerous.
And that's why funeral makers were dying of cancer
from inhaling all the formaldehyde, grim.
There's one kind of fun thing they used to do.
Sure, because I bought it down.
I was like, I do.
Yes.
In this is in ancient Roman frinerals,
you could pay an actor.
A lot of people did this.
You would pay an actor to dress up and wear a mask
as the person who died.
Yes. And then in the party, they'd kind as the person who died. Yes.
And then in the party, they'd kind of mingle with everyone.
Yes.
Pretending that they were still alive and like,
parodying the things that they did.
Oh wait, wait, is it?
I don't want to be parodied, but I would love someone to be...
I'll do it.
..doing some of my good stuff, you know, like some...
I'd even write some lines for them, too.
I think that's a great idea.
I've had an idea of a too. I think that's a great idea. I'm a fan of Andy and the funeral.
Some dude walking around going,
did you know the largest PDF file?
I don't know.
God, thank God he died.
Oh, that's amazing.
Look, wool.
I'm sorry, bringing you back to wool.
We went off to death.
Wool is an amazing material.
It has super substance that I had no idea about.
Have you not had a wool before now?
I didn't know how good wool was, basically.
Oh, OK.
So it's covered in scales.
If you look, if you zoom in, you look at it with a microscope.
It's covered in scales.
Liquid water slides off the outside.
So it's very hydrophobic, I guess.
So it's good at protecting you from water.
But it not absorbs, it absorbs water easily, right?
So if you have water vaping in here,
it kind of makes its way into the wool, like,
underneath the scales.
So once the water gets in, that keeps you nicely cool, for example.
Wait, so sorry, it's pushing off water.
It pushes off liquid water, but it takes in water vapor, okay?
And that releases heat.
So you're somewhere like a wool jump ring summer
and then it wins her as well.
Oh, sorry, yeah.
It's a heat room summer.
Ah, OK. It releases heat, so that can also warm you up,
even if it's got water vapor inside it.
So that's where keeping you warm.
So if you fall in a river that's freezing cold,
and then you get to dry land, be wearing wool.
Like, don't wear cotton if you've done that.
Right.
Basically, it's like, because you'll be much less harmed if you're wearing wool,
which has repelled the outside water.
It's not wet on the inside.
That's a top tip.
Yeah.
It's a top tip.
If there's two of you on, like, a raft,
and only one of you can stay on the raft,
the one who's wearing wool gets pushed in is what you're saying.
Yeah, exactly.
Right.
No, you're self-doubted.
Don't be on a raft with James.
They've invented a new kind of sheep this year. That's exciting.
A new kind of... They've bred. They've bred a multi-functional sheep
for the first time, which is very exciting.
Let's go for the function. Does it do your diary, organised?
It just does woolen meat, basically. That's the...
But that's new. That's...
I have the tube in mutually exclusive before that.
I think this is the most multi-functional sheet they've ever come up with.
Wow.
The sheep three.
It's a sheep three.
Yeah, yeah.
Is it not working?
Just drop it.
Drop it from a short height.
Well, yeah, that's incredible.
I knew Shags.
That's amazing.
Oh, I saw an amazing picture online,
which I want to go see in person.
If you go to which museum is it?
I think it's in the Science Museum.
Yeah, it's a Science Museum.
There's a jumper there made of wool, which is on display.
Can you guess why the Science Museum
would have a notable jumper of wool?
Knitted by...
Is that good?
No, no, no.
It's not been to the North Pole.
Not been to the North Pole.
Knitted by Einstein.
Knitted by some famous scientist.
Was there a famous sheep? Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly. Dolly but it's, you know, it's a bit part-tuning.
Pretty cool, though, eh? Very cool.
The world industry was so important for Britain that they had to do loads of laws for it.
So there was this thing with the burials, but there was another thing where they tried to get rid of all the wolves,
because obviously the wolves were killing the sheep.
So Ed would the first paid one guy, Peter Cobobbit, to destroy all the wolves in Britain, which he managed.
Why, why? We don't have any wolves anymore.
I'm just killing all the wolves.
And William the Conqueror would grant land to people in North
umberland and Cumberland on the condition that they would defend the land
from any wolves and any Scotsman.
LAUGHTER
It was mean putting them second and second.
LAUGHTER
Did you know, I sure you knew,
is that the wool sack that is in the house of Parliament?
Oh, the house in the kitchen.
It's a giant, it looks like a sort of giant cushion
called the wool sack and it's where the Lord Speaker sits.
And that is, was introduced by some...
Oh, I had to have it written down.
That was it.
Some King, basically, long time ago,
big two commemorate how important the Wall Trade is.
Yes, that's right.
And now it's stuffed with a blender wall from Britain
and the other wall producing nations of the Commonwealth,
the ones we stole and now...
Common, common, common, wolf, more, like...
LAUGHTER
Jesus.
That's it.
A slow hand clap of what I had.
I did it. I did it. I did it. I did it. I did it. No slow hand clap of what I had. I did it.
It did a feeling powering.
I didn't know.
No, just on the wallside.
I think it was centuries old.
It's really old.
And in 1938, they opened it up and they found, oh, it's horse hair.
Completely full of horse hair.
What?
Full of wool.
Scandal.
That is scandal.
So now they feel that with the calm, the calm of all do you know where we almost had wool
Well such a like like I'm where is do you mean like humans in our bodies? Yes?
The legs no the arms no
The teeth the teeth no no inside the body. Yes. Oh
How drunk are we? We used to have...
Some kind of...
No, no, no, we didn't use to. We almost had...
What, we almost had the world...
We almost had...
We almost had...
In our...
In our...
In our...
In our...
In our...
In our...
In our...
In our...
In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... In our... We almost had... Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence, though.
So...
In the 1950s, there was a lot of experiments going on.
In the 1950s?
Yeah, we didn't get boobs in the 1950s as a species.
Oh, we did! We did!
But what we did have was plastic surgery
where people were having their breasts enhanced
and there were many materials that were tested out
as what we would be using for breasted...
That is an itchy tint.
With it.
LAUGHTER
APPLAUSE
You do get itchy tits.
If that is made a wall, like...
Itchy on the inside.
Oh, that's...
They tried walls?
They tried walls. They tried sponges.
They tried ivory balls. They tried...
I agree. Yeah, they tried a lot of stuff. and then eventually it was the silicon implants that they worked in...
Sponges, so you could maybe decrease an increase, and putting in much water you put.
Yeah, yeah. Sounds good.
Anyway, I need to move us on to our next item.
Oh, okay. Do you want to say one more thing for we...
Well, I was just going to talk about the wool factories that we had.
So a lot of the wool factories in the north, they would have families who basically lived
in the shadow of them.
And the factories would kind of look after the feed them.
They would go to church with the factory owners,
all that kind of stuff.
And I was reading about one called the Fox's Will and Mill.
They invented Karki, the stuff that you use.
The Karki.
The Karki.
The thing you used to get into your car, yeah, yeah.
That's not what I thought you said, so. No, the cocky material. Cool.
And they said that the children would get free woolen clothing,
and they would be sewn into their woolen underwear in September,
and then let out again in May. Wow. I think they must have had an opening.
Yeah, there's an engineering problem there.
Exactly.
Wow.
But yeah, imagine that.
Put a tube in, you stay warm.
Yeah.
But being sewn into your underwear for six months of the year.
Livin' Newton John was sewn into those trousers in Greece.
That's true.
And they had to unpick her every time she needed it.
There was a story, wasn't there,
that Franz Ferdinand, when he was shot,
he'd been so into his uniform, Annie.
You had the bad.
The bad.
I was like, oh, they're gonna take me out, take me out.
LAUGHTER
APPLAUSE
It is time for fact number three, and that is my fact.
My fact this week is that in 1914, women were only allowed to visit the natural history
museum if a man agreed to sign a note promising that they would behave themselves.
So this is, yeah, this is, as I say, 1914.
I got this fact, by the way, from Dr. Furnradel.
She's a historian.
She's written books about suffragettes and the history
of sex and all that sort.
She's brilliant.
You can find her on Twitter.
And she put up this link, which was for one of the museums
by an author called Carrie Lott-Vos.
And it was a story of suffragettes.
And during 1912 to 1914, there was so much damage
that was going on in the name of trying to get their message out,
much the way that we see modern protesting,
that they would do quite big acts when they have destroying things.
And museums were a particular target.
And so museums basically had to shut down for a while.
You had to go by appointment in some cases.
But women specifically had a note that was presented to a man,
and they would have to hand in at the door, that then gave them access.
And if they did damage something, the man would be liable for the damage that they did.
And the woman.
Yeah.
Honestly.
Yeah, it was, it was wild, wasn't it?
The Natural History Museums weren't sure exactly what they might target.
The head of the museum said that unless explosives are used,
the large mammals are not likely to suffer very seriously.
But they did, like, they were bombing things at the time,
so there was a chance they might...
They're not worried about women's rights.
They're like, fucking hell, those elephants.
Oh, yeah.
They need protectant.
Well, they were mostly bothered about the coral. Apparently.
They must be older priorities.
Men, coral, women.
Yeah.
But it was such a big deal.
Loans of London actually started issuing householders
comprehensive insurance policies that covered damages
by airplanes, riots, and suffragettes.
No.
Like, that was part of your insurance.
As a woman, you did go to a museum.
You had to surrender your parcels, your muff,
and your umbrella at the door,
because all they were all used to conceal objects you type,
you did come out of the top of the game.
Well, the suffragettes, they act.
But the suffragettes came out saying
that we're gonna put hammers in our muffs.
Yeah.
Like, that's what some women can do.
Yeah.
Muff hammer is a good, cool nickname for a suffragett, isn't it?
WWE, not PAP.
Making her way to the ring.
She's got a note from her husband.
But he hasn't signed it, Sank.
Oh, also, we should all be saying, Suffragett's.
Oh, really?
Because they were very, very initially,
where the world was coined by a newspaper writer,
and they originally referred to as Sofra Gets,
because they took it on because they said,
we're going to get to the vote.
It was the Daily Mail.
Yeah. The Daily Mail coined the word Sofra Gets,
Jet Webbons.
But as a slam of a web-winter.
Yeah, just slam because they were not the nice ones.
Distinguished from the, yeah,
Women's Social and Political Union.
Sofragists, with the ones who came.
Yes, but they were peaceful campaigners. But then it became like, yeah, we's social and political union. The suffragists, with the ones that are in peace.
Yes, but peaceful campaigners.
But then it became like, yeah, we are suffigates, fuck you.
Yeah, yeah.
Just on the museums, just one last thing.
The assistant keeper of the National Portrait Gallery,
who was called James Milner, said that if women are
to be admitted into public galleries,
there seems to be no alternative,
but to handcuff their hands behind their backs.
And to put up a grill in front of all the pictures to stop them headbutting them.
Sounds of a policy for a safer Britain.
Wow, wow.
They really, really got up people's noses.
That's a word for it.
Emily Wilding Davidson.
Yeah.
Davidson, the one who threw herself under the King's horse
of the famous, she was the first human casualty.
But I was reading about her and she was actually like super violent
and had been for a very long time, was like throwing rocks.
She kept trying to throw rocks at Lloyd George, but kept mistaking someone.
And she was so violent that Pankhurst was like, get her out. This is too much.
Really?
She's going to do something nuts, yeah,
because she was just like attacking people, throwing
herself at people.
Because they all did Jiu Jitsu, didn't they?
They were trained in Jiu Jitsu by one of the suffigettes.
Edith Garrard led the teaching, because she knew how to do Jiu Jitsu.
And the idea behind the training
was that appointed bodyguards would surround leaders
like the Pankhurst basically, so thatguards would surround leaders like the panquer space
So that they had people in front of the studio duty
But they also had big wooden clubs concealed about their person in their muffanas. Well, I don't
Like no muff is big enough to hide these clubs. They had to hide them in their dresses
I was reading about the slow pace of female emancipation
was reading about the slow pace of female emancipation. Adjust that Saudi Arabia gave women the right to vote in 2015,
leaving Vatican City as the only place where women's suffrage
is still denied today.
Right.
Yeah.
Well, Switzerland only got it in 1991 as the whole country.
So it was in 1971 that the country had universal suffrage.
But all the canton's were allowed to vote on it themselves.
And they're like the sort of counties.
They're like the counties, yeah, but there are a lot of things
that they can kind of decide by themselves.
And there was one canton, the appenzell in a hold on canton,
that voted against women's suffrage in 73, 82 and 1990.
Fuck you now.
Come on, canton, get with it.
I know.
And the thing is, it's slightly weird because the way that they vote there, they don't
like go into a voting move.
They all go into the town hall square and kind of shout.
And the fuck?
Women.
I said it 15 years ago, or so far.
Sharp soldier.
Yeah.
And then in 1991, the federal government had to step in and say, look, this is the rule, guys.
You're embarrassing. You're embarrassing, I'm cool.
It's getting really embarrassing. Have you heard of the board game, Suffragetto?
No. Have you heard of the board game, Panca Squiff?
Yeah, they came out roughly at the same time.
Really? Yeah, yeah. What's yours?
My one is a game whereby it kind of looks like a chess board,
and you have all these pieces, and on one side,
your team's suffragette, and then the other side,
your team's police, and you need to get as many...
I want this game, this answer, mate.
Yeah, well, there's only one remaining copy of it,
and it's in the Bodleian Library.
I'm gonna go with my math and steal him.
Before I headbutt a painting.
I think you used to be able to download, I was going to say PDFs, but I think you could
download the board and stuff and learn about some things.
But Pankasweth, because it was Asquith, the Prime Minister.
So Asquith was the Prime Minister at the time, and this was 1909, and it was a board game.
You had to get across the board and avoid arrest.
It was the same kind of premise, yeah, yeah.
But the violence of the Suffragette movement
was part of this game of Suffragette,
because if you caught one of the suffragettes,
they went to prison, and if you caught one of the policemen,
they went to hospital. Yes.
LAUGHTER
Yeah.
And this was made by the Suffragettes, I think, the board game.
Yeah, so it was their own issue game.
Far too much. Far too much. They had a load of lunch.
We're not by a tote bag. We don't care what's on it.
We do not care.
What are the merch did they have?
Oh, they had sort of scars, they had badges,
and they had lots of questions.
Well, the colours, the big thing was the colour purple
one of the green and then they put that on jewelry
as well, and you'd have it on rings,
and it was like a secret you could wear.
The colours separately and everyone would be like,
oh, I know what you vote for.
That was one of the things of the,
at the 2012 Olympics, they had a suffragette display
as part of the opening ceremony.
And someone came out as a Emily Davidson
wearing the purple sash that was Emily Davidson's,
that was the genuine article.
Yeah, which is pretty cool.
We should probably say there is a bit of a debate
about whether suffragette tactics won the day in the end,
because they suspended all militant activities
at the start of the First World War,
and then by the end of the war, women were so integrated
in industry factories all over.
Are you saying war's good?
Is that women's goal?
Oh, are you saying the suffragette's are bad?
Yeah. Which one, Andy?
LAUGHTER
Because the live audience and the people are sitting at home
would like to know. Well, actually, I'm probably saying both.
LAUGHTER
Welcome to Jim Beanie's.
But no, there is a debate, isn't there?
Yeah, there's a debate.
It did actually did their achievement,
because they made themselves very, very hated at the time,
and then the impression was that by the end of the war
that women had just so much more anxiety.
And then would that happen without them doing
that movement in the first phase?
Don't know, yeah.
Before, yes, yeah, yeah.
But it's definitely like, oh, the toss is arguing, isn't it?
The toss is arguing, isn't it?
Can I quickly just speaking of people hiding things
in their muffs?
It just reminded me of my favorite headline of all time.
So the author, Kormak McCarthy, died earlier this year. It just reminded me of my favorite headline of all time.
So the author, Kormack McCarthy, died earlier this year,
and it was a headline that I saw years ago.
This is the headline, so he only just makes a cameo,
and this is not really to do with him.
Kormack McCarthy's ex-wife pulls gun from vagina
during argument over aliens.
Tell me you're clicking on that link immediately.
The Daily Telegraph has changed, doesn't it?
What was that? Where was that?
It was in a newspaper.
Oh, great. Yeah.
In a rack.
Yeah, by Vince Mansini.
Yeah.
Anyway, yeah. I've been wanting to say that for years
on this podcast.
MUSIC
I can't say that for years on the podcast. Yes!
Okay, it is time for our final fact of the show, and that is James.
Okay, my fact this week is that a designer from Indonesia, who recycles cow dung, has found
a way to make stalls from stalls.
Very nice.
Thank you.
Yeah, it's just a joke that...
Stools and Stools are the same thing.
But this is a thing that happened.
This was a display from the last Singapore design week,
which I read about.
It's all about upcycling.
So they made lighting from old washing machine pipes.
They made rugs from dog hair.
And this guy called Adhi
Nugraha has his team basically at his university has taken this dung, they remove the water,
I guess, rid of the smell, they add a load of wood glue and stuff like that. And then they
mold it into anything you want. You can get speakers, you can get stools, you can get flower pots,
more sorts. That's very cool.
That's interesting, yeah.
So good way of recycling.
A lot of it is burned, isn't it?
Countdown in India, which is really bad for the environment.
I mean, cows themselves are very bad for the environment,
and the dung is full of methane, and it just burning it
just is a bad idea.
But it can be used to coat walls.
Some other things you'd say.
Adolby, for instance.
Adolby.
Who and will combine? Well, so I was reading a thing about astronaut poop, coat walls. Yeah. That's another thing is you know. Adobe. Adobe.
Who and will combine?
Well, so I was reading a thing about astronaut poo and what it might be useful for.
Oh, yeah. And this is an exciting development. So it might be in future that astronauts
are able to power their own spaceship using polymers from their own poo.
Mm-hmm. So that's thrilling. As in, you can send astronauts to Mars and be like,
make your own way home.
Here's some fruit and fiber.
Exactly.
So you have six months.
And the other thing is, they might be able to grow their own...
This is a bit of a gross effect,
a bit trying to disregard it.
So they might be able to grow their own food from...
No, I said control, control the effector.
No one's ready.
There was scientists at Pennsylvania in 2017,
they researched this thing, a bio reactor, right?
Uh-huh.
So effectively, you poo in the tube,
and then they could...
Poo tube.
Poo tube.
That's a good name for it.
That's actually going to make it much more palatable to people, I think.
And it produces gases, it sort it gives off various biological gases,
and that fuels a microbial goo, which...
Oh, God, that's the worst word you've used so far.
We were all on board until microbial goo was gone.
That's squeamish.
microbial goo chief.
And they create a reactor, and the good news, good or bad news, as I suppose, it works.
And so that... So, one is the reaction, is it power?
Or is it one by getting out of it?
This is to produce the Vegemite-like microbial goo.
Oh, you're going to eat it.
And I should stress, you're not eating anything that you have.
Yeah, yeah. It's completely safe.
You're filtering it. It's like that.
It's all filtered. If I go to a restaurant, I know others go.
It's is completely safe.
LAUGHTER
Yes, it was one of your ship, but it's not anymore.
People change.
I thought it's well when you said about spearing stuff on walls,
I thought that was a thing that they were talking about
deep space exploration, because one of the problems
that you have when you're flying further into space
is that you go into these radiation bands
where suddenly you're just getting smashed by it.
And if you put poo all over your walls on the outside of the space ship.
Oh is it on the outside?
I believe so.
He's doing that job.
I thought it was on the inside.
Yeah, who's doing outside?
You go on a space walk.
You can go on a space walk.
What is your son doing that, sir, again?
He does PDFs, actually.
Just tell him. He has PDFs, actually. Just tell him.
You smear shit on the outside of a spaceship.
And we should be proud of him.
Jesus.
You can imagine slowly, you're sort of like 30 years
into an intergalactic mission.
You're outside your spaceship.
You smear and you lay the batch of shit on the outside guy.
They're taking the fucking piss, aren't they?
I should have done that drama degree, man.
Like, this is not worth it.
I was thinking of the fucking cross face.
They said, see the universe.
I said.
I was like, the usual, it was on the inside.
I did.
That was normal.
You were like, yeah, living in like a shit hole.
Well, there's more sense.
Should we think of going on a space walk, dismiss shit all over your ship? Yeah, I in like shit hole. Well, there's more sense. Should we think going on a spacewalk,
dismiss shit all over your ship?
Yeah, I think it does.
Well, it's like a distribution that's checking in with you, Dad.
A few months into the mission.
Sorry, sorry, astronaut Shriver.
We lost control, and have you been...
Damn, what the...
OK, send him home. Send him home.
As real as Shriby, you're going to need to turn your entire spaceship inside out.
No, Dan, you need to poo into the tube.
Right.
We're meant to filter it before you.
The video on poo tube isn't loading, I couldn't see it. I was like...
Recycling. Recycling. Recycling.
Recycling.
Paper, paper, right?
If...
Paper.
Well, this is insane.
Like, okay, you recycle paper.
Sure.
And then...
If you don't shame on you.
If you don't, and then you have recycled paper.
It's one of the easy ones.
You recycle it again, right?
It's one of those things that you can just keep recycling.
It turns out that you can only recycle paper seven times.
The same number of times.
You can fold it.
Yes.
Isn't that spooky?
That is spooky.
The tree knows.
The tree is like no more.
That me and wall and put me in the ground.
It's kind of like the sort of Doctor Who regeneration limit, isn't it?
Can I ask a question now? When you're recycling?
So I want to recycle this paper, put it in my recycling bin.
How do I know if it's been recycled seven times?
And I'm wasting more recycling.
This is nice paper.
As in the paper that you get zero in well.
It's quite like you.
It gets a bit rougher, doesn't it?
It does.
It does.
Rough low quality, pulpy paper.
Cheap notebooks will be made of that.
And then there'll probably some industrial use.
Yeah, but then if you've got a cheat notebook,
should you put, what should you put in there?
Not the only one he stressed about this, right?
No, no, absolutely.
Because you put so much in there, then you go to the big bin
on the estate, right?
And it's full of fucking plastic bags
because no one reads the sign properly.
And then is it worth me doing it?
Is that whole bin?
What?
Some more contaminates the bin.
I don't think we're saying don't recycle.
I think I... No, but in it, if you need... No, no, Kerry, Kerry. I don't think we're saying don't recycle. I think I...
No, no, no, Kerry, Kerry.
I've got to really bite down on this.
No, you should do it. I know. I do it, but it's frustrating.
I know, I know.
You have to be careful what you recycle.
That's it.
When turbine blades...
Oh, yeah.
..they wear out sometimes.
Yep.
..and they're really difficult to recycle.
Oh.
..okay, because they're made of lots of different polymers and stuff.
They've got a new one, a new kind of material
that they might use for turbine blades.
And you can recycle it by eating it.
Oh, wow.
You just get some microbial goo and then you spread it on top.
And so what's it made of?
It's made of fiberglass.
Yeah.
But as well as fiberglass, it's got some plant-derived polymers,
it's got some synthetic polymers in.
And once you've been working for ages
and you need to replace it,
you can kind of dissolve it
and all the constituent parts separate.
Wow.
And you can reuse all those different bits
and the plant-based ones you can turn into gummy bears.
Wow.
And the guy who invented it has made a win turbine,
then dissolved it, turned it into a gummy bear
and eaten those gummy bears.
I mean, I like gummy bears already.
If I find out that I'm eating gummy bears,
which are made from renewable energy turbines,
I'm gonna be over the fucking moon.
Oh, I'm in so good.
One thing that can be recycled that has been a bit
of a bane of the recycling industry for a while,
is nappies.
Oh yeah. Because sometimes they contain lots of different recycling industry for a while is nappies. Oh yeah.
Because sometimes they contain lots of different components
and it can be hard to separate them.
This is a really good study from this year.
Researchers from Indonesia actually
just where your original fact is from James.
And it's researchers have found a way of taking nappies,
use nappies, washing, drying, sterilizing,
treading them, right?
And then putting them into concrete and mortar.
And they have successfully built a home sterilizing, treading them, right? And then putting them into concrete and mortar.
And they have successfully built a home
that is 10% old nappies.
Wow.
And it's completely sterile.
It's completely, like, and it can use two cubic meters
of used nappies, one single story home,
without any weakness of structure
or integrity or anything like that.
And it's completely safe.
It uses up a load.
I think that is about the amount
a baby gets through in a year or so.
Not my baby.
No, no.
We could build half a milk to ease it.
That's me.
And so that's just a truss, if I'll be even.
That's amazing.
Even in the UK, half of the Welsh A487 Road is made of 100,000 nappies.
Amazing.
And they would do just recycled.
I know plastic pellets that are then part of the road material and then you time
I cover the top. So when we were talking about the three little pigs earlier blowing down a shit house
That actually could be a reality. It's all far off the future
We're gonna have to wrap up and it's that guys. We are at the end of the party. Oh
Yeah, so sorry. It's time. It's time. Yeah
Anything before we do you can recycle rare earth metals using fish sperm.
We're done. No one can talk, that's it.
Is that the stuff you get those in your phone, don't you?
Oh, you're rare earth metal.
This is a thing. It's a, you know, milt.
Milt is the technical name for fish sperm, basically.
So scientists use some, again, it's in the experimental stages,
it's not widely used.
But they made a powder out of some salmon melt,
because that is like largely composed of DNA,
which largely is made up of phosphate, right?
And that is charged in a way that attracts rare earth metals to it.
So if you put it in a solution with some rare earth metals,
because they, obviously, they're very important to recycle recycle and you want to recycle as much as you can keep it in
the system going round. And if you put it in a solution with some salmon sperm, then it
can be extracted. How much sperm do you need? Like are we going to have to farm fish and make
them ejaculate? Millions of times. I think that is the problem of scale in this. You're
absolutely right, because it's like a salmon is quite small and it's it is a waste product
for the fish industry, but it's not.
Not if you're a Mrs. Salmon.
How are you getting the milk?
Like, how do you collect milk?
I'm just asking for a vent.
I don't know.
The milkman just comes round, he's not on camera.
LAUGHTER
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